Beyonce: Renaissance (2022)

[0:00]In 2020, four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums as decided by Rolling Stone Magazine. That bit put an end to these super long intros. This resulted in a text chain. You're making it very hard for me to edit. This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music, excoriated the order, and led us to making this podcast. We are far from experts. We promise to do almost no research. Okay, just let everybody know. I just edited that to the beginning, but you are missing a bit about how my kid can't read very well and a bit about Russell's husband. Okay, so that's the bits that got cut. Just to let you know. We are far from experts. We promise to do almost no research. All opinions are our own, unless you disagree. Please sit back and enjoy. Beck did it better. Imagine all the funny jokes we could do from those bits and then slice it by like 75%. That's what you're missed out on. Do you think my husband would be critical of me sorting and throwing away bad baseball cards and alphabetizing all the other baseball cards? No, your husband would be all about it. Well, I need to be introduced to him then. Yeah. If he doesn't want you at your baseball, he doesn't deserve you at your Metallica album list.

[1:00]We are all the way down. The album, 71. Again. 71? Now, guys, what album did this replace? Exodus. Oh. But Exodus moved up, right? Russell. Exodus. Yeah, Legends. Legends came off at 47 or whatever. So, Russell, we don't need to see what moved up for that. We don't need to see what we would miss if we had to delete. We don't need to delete the Exodus bit Because I got to say... I had that email fired up and I got to go to the... Oh, sorry. I got to say... I got to go to Legends, yeah. The bits about our best bit tend to be pretty good. Like, when we're just bringing up our best bits, it actually makes for a pretty good show. Just cannibalizing our own stuff. We don't need to make new stuff. We're like Hollywood. I'll get it ready if we have another terrible voicemail that you need to delete like the last few weeks when you've been deleting all those voicemails. No. Magic Mike 69. The fact that Bartender came around and hugged his date and he was like, I know. I don't know exactly who to tell this information to.

[2:00]He was right. We're all the way down to album 71. Again, 2022, we have a new entrant on the top 500 albums as decided by Rolling Stone Magazine. It's one of the first albums that is younger than this podcast. Oh, wow. Hopefully, we can help this little album get a little bit of press. It's Renaissance by Beyonce. Guys, let's... You know what? Why mess around? Let's just get right into... Let's turn on the radio. What's up, everybody? Welcome to K-Rob. K-R-O-B. Sometimes I just want candy. Oh, yeah. I'm at the grocery store. And I see all that candy up in the front. They have that big Reese's cup. Hey. How about a crunch bar to pick me up? Peanut butter Snickers. How about some Twizzlers? I'll eat a Squishy.

[3:00]I want a box of Junior Mints Wash it down with lemon heads I'll take a baby Ruth My sweet tooth I'll take five A couple of Twizzlers would be perfect for two nights Candy tonight Eating a Cadbury egg in just one bite I'll take candy bars Three musketeers or bars I'll have a milky way Settle for a payday I'll take a candy bar by Dove I'll eat it before I even get to my car When you want to hear about the greatest albums of all time I think the nastiest things they do at the grocery store Is you know when you buy a candy bar and they say to you Hey, should we put this candy bar in the bag? It's like...

[4:00]Right in my grummy little hand, right? I don't know And I know this candy bar ain't going home It's not making it out to the card Unwrap it Put it straight in my mouth Rob, the key to that too is to throw that wrapper away in the garbage can Before you go in the house That doesn't go in the indoor garbage can Or it doesn't stand... It's got to go in the garbage can in the garage Russell sounds so much like a married guy Referring to the indoor garbage can Listen Those condoms... I was practicing putting on those condoms That's why they were all the garbage Oh, by the way, can I just say this? My wonderful dog, who I now give shots to twice a day My daughter had a gallon-tine's-day sleepover last night Where like seven of her teenage friends came over The dog immediately devoured two pads that were in the garbage Brought them out to the middle of the party And then ate them Oh, yeah Yeah, he's a joy He's wild He's wild and out I don't even know what to say

[5:00]That stuff only happened when he died Yeah, I was going to literally say I reminded me of some guys in college Who probably tried to do something like that Listen Okay This is back to the better We are talking about Beyoncé, Renaissance Okay, and who better to talk about this album Than four 40-year-old white guys White dudes Although I have to say when she did say tickled bitties I was like, yes, finally some music for me Our first album that uses the word tickled bitties We've been waiting for four years We made it I thought I heard it once on Ray Charol's Sounds of Modern Country Music, but I'm not sure Okay You said I can't recall I've got Matt in Minneapolis Matt, how are you doing tonight? Good, Rob I just wanted to say Take a look on your left there Everything you own is in a box on your left Make sure you're having me Oh, no, my DVDs I've got Russell in Minnesota Russell, how are you doing tonight? Rob, you can be my daddy if you want to But those cryptid songs won't break my soul

[6:00]You won't break my soul Listen By the way, speaking of breaking a soul My shoe did blow out It worked the other day too It's not what I think about it this week I've had more different blowouts Should probably be seeing a doctor You have a family of heart and stuff Do you have any weird funguses on your body? Is any part weirdly brown? Have you blown out more than three pieces of clothing this week? Hey, Rob, this is like unrelated But could you send us the password To take the podcast down just in case? Just in case Never know Yeah No What would hurt you more if we took it down Or if we replaced you instantly with John From Edina and had bigger listenership Oh, listen, I only want the best I would happily die for that You would Oh, yeah, if it took me committing Harry Carey for that to happen I would definitely, I'd be in my kitchen so fast Really, what is the conversation?

[7:00]Because you have that thought of If you were talking to your spouse And you're like, I'm gonna die And you're like, I want you to be happy But I don't want you to find anyone else Or we would say, go out there and find someone else I mean, who is the choice, Rob? If you go, is it only John from Edina? You don't think I've tried To tell my wife, listen, I just got back from the doctor I'm dying You should go fuck somebody else tonight Bring him back And then if you could have your head by the foot of the bed Because I don't want to be filming his asshole the whole time She's like, wait a minute, what? Are you faking your death So you can film me having sex with somebody? Sweetie, I told you I wouldn't do that again Pretty sure it's the plot of Cruel Intentions 2 There was a 2? Yeah Meanwhile Meanwhile, there's some symphonies playing in the background I have to tell you I do get Rob confused with Ryan Phillips on a regular basis

[8:00]Russell Russell didn't realize that it's Cruel Intention This is how many times you'll jack off It was in small letters at the bottom and then it's 2 What? Yeah Cruel Intentions is how many times you'll jack off Here's the question I mean, I don't like talking about this Because if something happens, you feel bad Is it my wild thing? Is it my wild thing? Is it my wild thing? Is it my wild thing? Is it my wild thing? Is it my wild thing? Is it my wild thing? Would John from EdINA jump all 3 of us to The main host or would the 3 of us be applying To be the main host? John, would You be the main host? I don't think I could do it No The skill You have, there's no way You can replace What you do No There's no replacing You Yeah cause You see the unedited, what I'm dealing With Like the madness of Eve It's pretty emerge The madness Sort of the end of an episode would I just tell Just a killer joke, okay?

[9:00]A killer joke, okay? Let's just say it right, but how big is this musmexion? And I get absolutely blank stares back on the podcast, Just totally defeating me. It's like the ripped pants of the podcast. Do you think you could ever do anything like brave After ripping your pants? Like, is there anything you could pull off? It happened to me, it was one of your guys Bachelor parties we were downtown. I hopped in the car with some random people, Tore my pants, jumping into the car At the beginning of the bachelor party downtown. Why were you getting someone else's car? I don't know, I thought it would be funny to do that. Tear the pants right off the crotch. Later in the night, we were at a gentlemen's club. I've got to like, stay in the corner and hide, And I was terrified the whole time. You definitely didn't catch anything from it. You're like, oh, it's a bad night to wear a jockstrap. You just catch something from every chair in there. What?

[10:00]This is a good thing you're in CPR class. It's like the problem with that. It's like the problem with Aaron's laptop last week. Yeah, the same thing. Virus. God, and then you're, what's the next sound? Beyonce? I'll tell you what. Russ goes to the doctor, he's like, I didn't even know there were pubic crayfish. That sounds bad. What the fuck is that? Down here we call them pubic crawdads. What are you talking about? You got pubic crawdads, monomy. What? What am I really going to explain what I'm talking about? Okay, here's what I'm talking about. You blow up your pants. You got to watch this because next week He's going to make a song about one of us Like jerking off to pubic crayfish. Yeah, right. We're going to hear from an actual member of the Bayhive Is going to be like, don't disrespect his album With your pubic crayfish talk. I what? But you said it the first time we did Beyonce, Who would talk about pubic crayfish more than Beyonce? Dirty? This album again. Yeah. Aaron, there's a whole song. That has the word, your favorite word.

[11:00]And Rob, what do we do? He does not. It does. What are you doing? There's a whole song about somebody being Old country buffet-y. Yeah, though. No. Look at genius. No. Move it along. Can't do this. I think pure honey, maybe it is. Look it up, Aaron. I'm going to look it up. Okay. And I've got Aaron out in, I got Aaron out in California. I got Aaron. And Aaron Aaron was telling me That he used to know the Slovenian sound guy. Okay. He would go to a theater And the guy who ran the sound was Slovenian. Okay. That was the guy who ran the sound was Slovenian. But then he also knew a Czech one too. Czech one too. Hey, Rob, let me sit on top of you. Let's talk about Renaissance. That's funny. I swear to God. Look it up please. There's a song that has that in it. You can't even acknowledge Aaron's joke. He just plowsed right through. He didn't like it. He didn't like it. Hey, maybe we should sit Rob down For his annual review of being the main host

[12:00]Like he got last week at work. That's true. We should give a review, performance review. Performance review. Yeah. Look at him. Look at him. It's not funny. The thought of it is just terrifying. I don't want to hear it. Okay. Let's start. Let's go on through one. Aaron, you want to go first? Yes. I can go first. You know I hate this. I can go first. Rob, you need to listen to people more. Oh, why? You know, people are trying to have A conversation with you. You need to listen. I agree. I thought my song last week was great. No, not last week. It was terrible. And Rob, when you're listening, You have to actually hear people as well. You can't just listen and you need to hear them. Okay, do you want me to say What I was thinking to their joke then? You can't do it. Look at him. Beyonce does love to sit on people for sex, Doesn't she? She has a number of songs over a number of albums Where she is sitting on people having sex. And I thought about that for quite some time today. Like that was something where I was like, I better meditate on this idea. Rosie, will you look up here, honey, And just read the lyrics for us? Maybe just the first part.

[13:00]Sure. Thank you, man. See what I can find. Thank you, man. You don't need to do the whole thing. Just the first. Okay, let's just see here. Give me a moment. Oh, Aaron. I can't believe you said that. Wait, I'm still looking at it. Oh, Aaron. All right, oh. Oh yeah, that's a lot of the, wow. I think she says, check my technique, right? I think that's in there somewhere. Two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Wow, I've listened to this song a lot of times And I'd never actually noticed That's what she was saying. Yeah. I know the bad bitches to the left. Oh, Aaron, I don't even like that. I have to say that makes me very comfortable. To the right, but I do not know. What do you guys think is your number one technique? If you had to say like, I'm the best at whatever Technique, what is your best technique? You talking about sex-wise? Anything. Could be anything. Your bartender, sex-wise, it could be whatever. Be cooking, it could be whatever you want. What's your go-to technique? The technique you would show off to people?

[14:00]I don't know, but it has to do with the pinkie. The one story I told my wife about John Is that he told me once he jacked off And he was driving a car, I've never forgotten that. I think about the sock all the time. If you see a random sock in John's car, He goes, don't pick it up. The idea is that we jacked him driving a car. I was like, oh, is this sock my size? I thought I love jack it off. That guy loves jack it off. It's his favorite thing to do. There's this scene between Red Wing And Rob Parks and Still Boat, And it is such a great drive to just jack off. The interesting conundrum about that type of activity, You almost got to be going like 60, 70 miles an hour. Like you can't be going like 35, 40 Where you're running into stop signs or lights. You've got to be going pretty damn fast, right? Listen, you can't be going somewhere, Like you've got to have a little while Before you get to your destination, And you can't have to like go see your grandma right away.

[15:00]Like you've got to. Aaron, Aaron. Don't even talk about grandma's strength. That is true. Maybe that's the wrong, I'm. Officer, my grandma is stuck in her washing machine Right now. I have to get there. Her name is Mona. There's some other techniques. I mean, I remember one called a wristwatch, One called a bird bath, One called a mount. You get into penis puppetry. You'd have to display the art purposefully When you just, you show the wristwatch. That's a classic, but yeah, you got to get the... Can I just tell people, There was a guy on the football team Whose penis was so big That he would say to you, what time is it? No. And you'd look over and he would have his flaccid penis Wrapped all the way around his wrist. And he'd be like... This is what John did. This is John. So John's hung like a horse. I can't even relate to this. He would pull it away from his body rustle And it would still wrap around his wrist. Like it was crazy. It looked like he was, They had like a name tag on it laying here. Crazy.

[16:00]Crazy big penis. My wristwatch was very different from that guy's. My wristwatch was, Didn't actually get around the wrist. It was... I don't even know if I can get over the broad side Of the top of the wrist. You're a little on and around the holster cuffs. I did something called the Jedi Strikes Back. What's that? And that's where I'd bend over And I'd stick a Boba Fett doll in my butthole. And it would be like a sand monster. What are you? What is? What is this? This is Sarlock. Yeah. And then I'd be like, Wait, here comes some Ewoks. This is what happened to me. It's one new audience member, one. And it's, he's been sitting on these jokes. Like he's been holding out on us. Bad air. He's got some material. I think we have confirmed that John, From he died at Wood, Joe, Paul, three of us Would be the new bananas. I mean, you get it. Can I just say this? The idea of having to check over your shoulder, Like on a yield and orgasming at the same time Would be such a bummer. Wouldn't it? Like, can you imagine an action you want to do less

[17:00]While you're orgasming and then like, Oh, what's over there? You know, get your flight spot. No, I didn't keep checking on Highway 61 Because there's a lot of semi truck traffic And you got to watch out for the higher vehicles They can see down. It's kind of a hill area. You know, finishing. This fucking pervert was watching me jack off While I was driving. You got to look out. There's a lot of sickos out there. You call the number in the back of the truck. How's my driving? Yeah, you drive a sample because you watched me jack off. Put something on the roof of your car. How's my jacket? Hey, is that the studio where Nirvana Recorded or is that a new jack off for his car over there? How far are we? Right. Sure. All the pins show. You're going to go right at 19 to get to Northfield here. Let me go north to south, right? If you're coming from the south, you'd have to go left on 19. Oh, god, damn it. I mean, hey, can I just say a little message to my kid

[18:00]Who may be listening to this after I passed away? This is who I really am. OK, this is your dad. Oh, all right. Any time we read the Doctor Seuss book, I was thinking about jokes like this. I'm sorry, you have to find out this way. Fish, two fish, red fish. It's like that Keanu Reeves movie Where he like is talking to his dad through the mailbox or whatever. They're a frequency, right? Where they're talking over the radio. But all the person on the radio is insane is like, oh, I jack off on a drive. You'd be like, well, I don't know who this is. I don't want to talk to this person from the future. I was wondering how awkward this is going to be for like people Or that are in a car and there are two people in the car listening to this And they're looking at each other, being like, wait, Would this ride be different if I wasn't here? But then I realized like there's probably not anyone who listens

[19:00]To our podcast with another person in the room Or other than Brian and his son, right? I think just Brian and his kids. Yeah, Brian and his whole family. Yeah, they gather around like we're FDR doing a fireside chat. I want to talk to you about how a condom should be small if you're smuggling drugs. One inch longer in my pocket could just hold my life. We're not that weird. Can we not go one episode without Lyndon Johnson as a big dick jokes? Can we not? You guys, we are not the only I learned. We're not the only podcast that talked about the Lyndon Johnson pants. No, this week. There's a podcast called You Are Good that my wife listens to That also talked about it last week. Of course. We're not the only ones. Guys, this reminds me. There's before we get to the voicemail, We have an emergency back dinner better moment. OK. And this one is going down as an all time. And thank God you're here. Thank God you're here.

[20:00]There has been another celebrity cox I did. Oh. Recently on Twitter, I was alerted to the fact That none other than Drizzy himself Had not just a photo, but a video Of him jacking off that he was going to send to a woman. What? And I'm happy to say I went out and I found that video. No. Of Drake. Yes. And I. He had jeans. He had jeans. I'm much joy to report this. Great. As a massive hog. It's absolutely enormous. It's so big that he was doing a full hand up and down. And that thing was still like a helicopter. It was crazy. OK, out of respect to you, I will not pull it up right now. But go on Twitter, type in Drake video

[21:00]And just know that we have another thing to bring up and talk about. I come from North Carolina. Take your shirt off. As you know, with Lenny Kravitz getting into the rock and roll of fame, That's one coxman. Liam Neeson wins a Nobel Prize or a Academy Award. What? Maybe a Nobel Prize. OK. I was going to bring up Drake in the context of this album, But you already. Wow, it's already. Yeah, I'm bringing him up because I saw his hog a couple days ago. Really beat that at all. And that's the thing. It was so big where you got a question if he put it out there himself, Because I would have. I would send that to my work email. In response, you'd be like, You can send it in response to any messages From the guy who gave you the performance review. Just like, yeah, I got your message. Here's what I've got for you. I would see it. So if people want to start a group chat about it, they could. OK, I'm not even going to buy and see it. They know it's going to. That's a fun 43 year old joke. All right, listen.

[22:00]Hey, we're running a little long tonight. So let's get into the voicemail. Don't say like that, Russell. We actually have plenty of voicemails. Don't call me. It's not a problem. We've got backline. Plenty. And I don't see that being a problem any time soon to 7 7 2 3 2 5. If this is Magic Mike 69 with another disastrous date, It's going to be so clutch to save your fur podcast. Best of the better host. I have a question that I thought you all might have good insight on. Several years ago, I set my wake up alarm tone to play the song One day more from my meds and I've never changed it to anything else. My question for you all is, what is your go to wake up alarm song For your morning routine? Or if you don't have one, what do you think makes for a good Wake up alarm song? Thank you. Bye. Wow, that's that's really. Oh, I like this is a wake up.

[23:00]Man, this is good. Now, it's never ending road before you guys talk about your alarm. Can I tell you about one of the best alarms I ever had that Won't be able to make it to the crime? Surely come a second time. Hey, Aaron, just a warning. We can replace the third lead host on this podcast. You can keep it up. He's sitting right there. That shit up. He knows how he's ever heard it. Are you obviously not going to sing along with this? I don't even know what this is. Bullshit this. It's not legit. Don't it's lame is the show. You're some lame is on this podcast before. I only know the two songs. Listen, the fact that Russell picked Aaron As the third co-host without even thinking about it, Just automatically went right to number three. He's been thinking about it. The last can I tell you guys the best alarm I ever had. There was an app for a while on the phone Called the wakey, where you could either call the app And it would randomly set you up With somebody who has set their alarm for that time.

[24:00]So then when you set an alarm, Somebody from a different time zone would call you. And so you'd wake up to a phone call. You would immediately have to talk to a stranger on the phone And it would automatically cut off after 10 seconds. So you couldn't like be weird or calm back. You didn't know their number. So they'd be like, hello. They'd be like, where are you from? But I'd be like, oh, the U.S. They're like click and you're up. You are not going back to sleep after that. Oh, yeah, it's creepy. Yeah, it was wild. It was really fun when I was doing it. I was like, just starting the day off in a chaotic way. Aaron, what do you have for an alarm? I bet it's a weird shit. I don't use an alarm because my son wakes us up. If I were going to use a song for an alarm, I would have said wake up by Arcade Fire. But I think they're canceled. So I think I would just use international players, Anthem, because I think that's the greatest song ever. You don't use an alarm at all. Like what do you have to get for a flight or something? I said, but yeah, I guess if I'm doing that, Then I use just like whatever default alarm is on that. You're a default alarm guy.

[25:00]Yeah, I think I might just like slow rise. But yeah, like imagine that this was your alarm. If I didn't set an alarm, I wouldn't get up before noon ever. Like somebody coming in and jumping on your bed. I always jump the room. This is your alarm. Wouldn't this be a great alarm? You got to be kidding me. This is why just top international players, Anthem, to play this or is it only a 10 hour video? So we'll just go home. My button's broke. I can't do it. This is what you'd wake up to, man. This I think this is what my wife wakes up to. This is brutal. I cannot wake up to a real alarm. Russell, what do you got for an alarm? I just have like a normal phone alarm now. But you know, when I was really doing better with working out, Getting up early, getting stuff accomplished. Rob, you're killing me. You got to stop that sound. Jesus. This will sound weird. I used to listen to Jocko Willink Warpath. What's Warpath? It's like a it's like a motivational type speaker,

[26:00]Like a guy who has no Jocko, like the Navy Seal. Yeah. So I used to listen to him and he would talk about, Like, I don't need an alarm o'clock. My passion wakes me up. So I used to listen to him when I would get up And I probably should start listening to him again. It's probably part of the reason that I'm drinking espresso martinis Instead of getting up and doing productive things. But wait, are you drinking espresso martinis in the morning? No, I'm drinking one now, though. And I'm telling you, the new key to espresso martinis, A pinch of sea salt over the top of the foam, Aaron. Love it. Yep. I'd be I'd be in for that. Isn't a quick path and there are no shortcuts. Bro, you're waking. This is six minutes long. You're lying there for six minutes, getting motivated. Listen to it. It's a miracle drug or an orange. No wonder you're getting shit done for some super food. Guys, I listen to this every morning. I would be dating new people all the time, too. A hack or a trick or a one. This is what you listen to before you update Your dating profile every morning, right, Rob?

[27:00]That's right. Is that Macklemore? It's a daily, a weekly. Russell, that is unbelievable That you wake up to an inspirational message. I don't anymore. Well, yeah, if I was sleeping next to somebody And they woke up with that, I would immediately leave Because I think they're going to chop off my head. God, that has to be the first thing to go. We all make some changes when we... Now, Russell, did you ever have somebody Over in that alarm accidentally goes off and they hear it? Are we talking, is this the wife's swap episode That's not going to make you a wrap? John just turned on his driving background Zoom screen. It's strange. The only way you can do it now. If that were an aphrodisiac for someone, Would you feel better about that person or worse? If they had to be in their car to come? No, the jack-of-willing thing. That's what you were doing for your life. And your bed partner were like, yeah, keep that on. Let's go. And you got any David Goggins on this playlist or what?

[28:00]I saw him in Las Vegas. He was out for a run. I saw him in Henderson. Bro, all my coffee beans have been shit out by cats. Okay? All I drink. I've had that stuff. Matt, what's your wake up? Because you say it's a pumpkin? I can't even talk to a brother right now. I can usually just wake up But if I don't, I just, I get my watch And it's just a little heptatic or whatever they call it, Have a heptatic, it's just the tapping. So I don't even have an alarm per se. Well, some psycho shit. Listen, was that the, oh, so Matt, What do you have for alarm? I know you can, you're a watcher. You know, I usually don't have an alarm, But I just if I do have one, I can usually just get up, but if I don't, I've got my watch and it just got the heptatic Little, just taps me, taps my wrists and wakes me up. Guys, I'm so sorry. I was writing a joke while you guys were talking about that. Last time I was listening. I think what we said is Rob could use some listening

[29:00]Improvements on his performance review. It's in there. It's right there. I'm seeing the comments on the performance review. Last time we gave you these criticism, You didn't appear to listen to it, Rob. You didn't respond to our message To know that you got our message about listening. This confirms why they need to make sure Rob responds to emails to me. Like there's, I feel bad saying it right around When I can see him on the screen, but I guess, come on. Hey, it's too hard to fuck with a guy. Oh my God. What a terrible criticism to get. Now listen, it's just not listening again. Are we gonna change it? No, I guys, I listen, I try. You know what? I actually listen to this podcast more than anybody Because I have to edit the whole thing. No, you listen to it on repeat. You don't listen to it when we're on. And then, well, and then sometimes I do When I'm editing, I like, you're a good joke. And I'll be like, oh, I wish I would have heard that. That was a really good joke. I could have wished on that for a while. If only it's wearing some headphones In which I could have heard these guys. Too bad we don't have some more of them, Rob? Anyway, so I think what we're gonna do now is,

[30:00]Oh yeah, Matt, what's your, No, well, you did Matt's alarm. John, what's your alarm? Hey, I go in with, if it's Monday, I use to do John Prine. It's gonna be a long Monday and that wakes me up. And if it's not Monday, Then I listen to Cranberries, The album that has the eyeball, It's just the big eyeball head. Zombie, zombie. No, after zombie. There's an album after zombie. That was the weird thing to wake up to. Russell, that was the weird thing to wake up to, wasn't it? No, the album was the big eyeball. Wait, listen, we're at Music Podcast. We don't know the album with the eyeball. We have no idea. Well you know, the Cranberries, Great music, not zombie, but after zombie. We made some great music. Never will love can't wake up. This is a great way to wake up. I love it. You know, mine is kind of like yours, John. I do what my alarms are? I've got a mixture of this one by Bob Dylan. This is a, I, this one is a kind of Bob Dylan

[31:00]In the morning. Oh yeah. You use Oxford Town? Yes. It's so pleasant to wake up to. Please don't Google what this song is about. No, I don't do that. Jesus. I mean. Guns and clubs followed him down. This was brown. Oh, this is great. No. Oh yeah. It's great to wake up. Great song. Or I do, this is my all time, This is my alarm all the time too. Dylan, you guys, waking up just, Songs like this. On the island of Stromboli. Oh, it's such a pleasant way to wake up. Now, if this goes up at 6.30 a.m. On a Saturday, When your wife is singing. That's Billy Bragg singing, right? Yes. Unbelievable album. Bermade Avenue, Billy Bragg, Wilco. Yeah, it's got California stars on it. Yeah, so good. You want to hear what I've been listening to Every morning this week? What have you been listening to? I'll play it through the speaker. We'll see if you guys can hear it all right. I'll pump it away up. Ready?

[32:00]Maybe it's not working. Oh, what? Oh, you'd fuck. I just sent. I have my phone on the Bluetooth speaker upstairs In the record player. And I'm pretty sure I just started blaring Where in the world is carbon San Diego. And there is someone screaming upstairs. I've been deep shit right now. Oh, hey, Magic Mike, If you want to send that girl's number to the podcast, Just text that to us. We've got somebody who's looking. A scream from upstairs and my phone Was not playing carbon San Diego. So someone, I'm in deep shit now here. I'm going to try. Hey, Rob, recue me up. This is what I'm listening to this week. Oh, fuck. Here we go. You hear it?

[33:00]Rob, pull up Rockapella. Where the world is carbon San Diego. That's all I listen to all week. Yes. The beginning. At the beginning is the greatest moment In music history. Yeah. Wow. That's not through here, but that's OK. How long are you guys alarms going up? I would say I'm a five to seven snooze guy In morning. Oh, my God, Russell, that's not very inspirational. Five to seven snoozes. That's the best snoozes. I don't listen to the Jocko anymore. Listen to fucking Rockapella. So you're sleeping next to somebody Getting five to seven snoozes. Rob, the idea that you think my upstairs roommate Doesn't get up before me is the most laughable thing In the history of this podcast. I just couldn't manage to be in a bed with you, Russell, Getting up and leaving. That's crazy. Last time I was in a bed with you, Rob, you kicked me out. Oh, it's like a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, Russell, this isn't your bed.

[34:00]Huh? What? Listen, it was a great voicemail. That was a great voicemail. Thank you so much. Let's get into rolling and going. It's it's it's time to see what everybody's up to. It's time for rolling and going. My nephew is like three, again, Not quite sure how old he is. We went over that earlier. No idea. But he, the thing he knows how to do on a phone And he will do it instantly if he gets your phone, Is he resets all your sounds. So for a while when I got email, You were that submarine clackskin one that went, Went. I was like, what is that? I changed, he had gone through and changed all my sounds To the craziest sounds. It took me like a week to recover from that. Just hearing random sounds out of my phone Every time I got a tweet or whatever. Rolling, going, Aaron, how was it? Things going with you? Things are going great. Two weekends ago it was, or last weekend I can't recall.

[35:00]We had, we went up and had some adventures in the snow. It was fantastic. We did some, we took Friday off. We did some downhill skiing on Friday. We did tubing on Saturday. We did cross country on Sunday. It was all wonderful. But what I wanted to talk about, I teased it last week. Teased him last week. I was in line for the chairlift on Friday. And it was with my son. And this was really cool. My son, it was, he's done downhill once every winter For three years in a row. And he has decided he doesn't want to take lessons. But he's getting, he's learning, he's getting better. So he now was able to do the chairlift And go down a real hill. He still doesn't stop or turn. And like anytime he's like going on the ski, He's just like so stoked and just like Puts his hands up in the air and yells like, This is incredible. Like it's so fun. And then he just falls over when he wants to stop. So it's all wonderful. So we're in line for the chairlift. Can I recommend Aaron? Yeah. Couple lessons. Wouldn't hurt. Yeah.

[36:00]Wouldn't hurt. He kind of refuses him. So and you're never sure if you're going To be able to make it up there because of the weather Or whatever. So you're like, well, we'll just, and, You know, we're going to do the chairlift. I was really stoked. We're having a great time. I hadn't I I had my flasks. I had a couple of sips of something, But nothing major. And so I was like, Spacing out and I hear people. And this was Super Bowl weekend. Right. So we're there on the Friday of Super Bowl weekend. We've already talked about my feelings on the game, But I heard some Niner fans. Like I'm at the chairlift in, You know, at Donner Pass in Northern California. Like this is everyone's are going to be a Niner fan. Now, can I just ask you when you're at Donner Pass, Where they have like fun human themed things where it's like, Oh, a settler finger hot dog. Some pretzel bites. No, it doesn't happen. Like, but you have to, Anytime you are up there, You got to make the jokes about it. Like an Argentinean rugby team comes by And he's like, this is the place for us to be. It was a little thigh piece. Yeah. So we're in line for the chairlift And like I'm kind of just enjoying life.

[37:00]Like I'm really happy. And I hear like these Niner fans that they're like, But they're getting louder and louder. And they're saying like, yeah, I mean and then, And then we're going to beat that ass on Sunday. And I'm kind of thinking like, cool, All the Niner fans are excited. And then like my son kind of like looks at me and he's like, Dad, like, yo, like these people are like, They're kind of talking to you. And I was like, why would they be like talking to me? And then I remember that when I go skiing, I wear my Iowa state cyclones jacket. So this thing is like full red and gold. And I'm thinking like, well, everybody knows That Brock Purdy is the Niner quarterback. Like it's got to be fine. And I realized these people were like trying to start a fight With me because I was wearing chiefs colors. I see what you're doing, Rob. Yeah. They're like, they're standing behind me in line Trying to like get a thing going with me Because I was wearing, They thought I was wearing a chief's jacket. I was wearing my red and gold. So cardinal gold. I was state jacket. So I try to turn around this kid.

[38:00]Now, wait a minute. This kid has already seen you get bitten By a very small dog. Okay. It's true. Yeah. At this point, And then have an old lady come to care for you After it happened. That's right. I don't even think I told you guys, I'm friends with the lady, Susan, whose dog it is, Coco. We're buddies now. We went to, we had Peach Pie at Wendy's house For Wendy's birthday. We're friends now. Now, Aaron, are you trying to... Coco is still alive? Yeah. Are you trying to infiltrate this To poison the dog later? Or have you just... No. I'm good, man. This is the Asia thing, huh? Yeah. Did you play this song for her? Will she download the podcast? I'll give you a try. Just Air Drop is the word I do. I do that to a lot of people in the same way. They hate it. Here's the thing, Aaron. So now you're going to turn around on skis. There's a chance you could fall over. Yep. Okay. Are you going to turn around And show them the front? Are you going to say... Yes, I tried. I tried. So I turned around and I was like, No, no, no. It's Iowa State.

[39:00]It's Brock Purdy. These were not the type of Niner fans who know Where their starting quarterback went to college. So they are not picking up on what I'm putting down. And they've probably had more Hennessy than I have that morning. I think that's almost every Niner fan. Even as a Viking fan, If someone was wearing a green and white coat, Like starter jacket, Before the Eagles were playing the Vikings, And they're like, No, no, it's Michigan State. I would be like, what? Even sports fans don't know that shit. I would say the kind of people that yell at people in public About wearing a jersey for a different team Are not the kind of person where you turn around and say, I understand the mistake that you made. Let me explain this to you logically. And I'm sure we can get through it. Yeah. So, and like other people in line were like, Kind of trying to help me out. They were like, Oh, you should like write Purdy on the back. And like I didn't explain to them, Like I don't wear another grown man's name on my back. Like that's not something I want to do. But you sure talk about how they perform in sporting events. Well, sure. Yeah. Of course.

[40:00]There's a different thing. Aaron, what I would have done is I would have held up my hand Like this kind of like I'm, I don't know, like I'm going to maybe, I don't know what, but then I would, Like a princess wave. I would point at them like this, Aaron. I would point over and over with my hand. I would say, you are mistaken. You know, like that, Like just making this choppy motion. And I would make the choppy motion that they would know That you're forward. I wish I had you guys along with me. I would have thought of that. So it all blew over, but my son had to clue me in. He was like, dad, those people think you're the chief. So I was like, oh, I made a huge mistake, But it all. I've been there once before for a game. I went to a Colorado state football game At mile high in Denver. Nice. And I was actually wearing an Oakland A shirt That I bought when I visited Aaron once. Got a nice Oakland A shirt that I bought for five bucks From a roadside vendor. Get it for less now. Wow. And it's a green and yellow shirt. And that's kind of the colors of Colorado state. And I'm sitting in the dead middle

[41:00]Of like the Colorado section. And I went and got like a beer And people were yelling at me. And I was like, Oh no, I immediately went and bought Like a Colorado shirt and put it on over. And I was like, I'm not, I'm not going to be accosted by college students For the next three hours. That would have been smart. Yeah. I got to remember my color ways next time And next time this happens. That's like, I'm close to like three NFL stadiums I could get to by train. And I have zero interest In seeing the Vikings play there because I'm like, I don't, I don't want to get harassed. I'm not going to wear the jersey. You know what I mean? Cause my dad used to do that thing Where you just run up to somebody To hit him with a beer bottle. You know what I mean? That's that old. I was like, I don't think so. And I'm playing that old way. Didn't your dad also do the thing Where he gave people like super, Like tainted drugs and then throw, Like put them outside of his house And then lock the doors and let them in or not. No, no, no, no, no. They knew what they were doing. They chose to go out there, Russell. Oh, I thought we were talking about chiefs fans. The dumb guy defense. I don't know. I think they just went out there.

[42:00]I don't know. Sorry. We shouldn't have brought that up. I apologize. How's it going with Rob? I thought I went to a bad Super Bowl party. Oh shoot. I didn't win the squares. This will be the worst thing That happens to me all day. Well, I'm going to head up to the backyard, Hang out in the backyard for a little bit. Once again, I tried to get Rob. I tried to throw the ruling going to Robin. He didn't even, he didn't even. Over time, Super Bowl. That was pretty exciting. He's still going. That'll probably be the greatest football game I ever see. Over time in the Super Bowl. Well, better walk to my car. I think it's out this door. All right. Russ brought it up. He's listening, but he's not here. You know what? What? He heard me. He heard my tee up. You guys just didn't let him run with it long enough. Thank you. I'll freeze you in the backyard bit. Okay. Write that down in the best of Russell. We're putting that in the best of. Trying to throw him the rolling going. Rowling going to Rob. How's it going with you? Now, listen, two questions.

[43:00]Oh, listen. We're, of course we're listening. My friend Suzanne. Hey, listen, please. Sometimes you guys don't listen Because you're not laughing at what I say. So I assume you're not listening. My friend Suzanne is coming to the Twin Cities Early or mid July. I'm taking her up to the cabin. We're going to hang out for a couple of days Up at the cabin. Shores of Minnesota. Seriously? You have a friend traveling here. You're like, Hey, we're going to take you Up to Northern Minnesota. I'm going to make you get fly here And then get in the car. Watch my wife's phone disappear. She is a New Yorker. She has never been outside the city of New York. She's going to think the cabin is a nightmare. She's going to hate it. Okay. It's going to be fun to watch. I was thinking Russell, We have a couple of days in the city. Now she is coming with a queer, Black gospel choir. Now, why she is in this choir? I don't know. But here's what I'm thinking. We get to Minneapolis. Russell throws a little party at his place.

[44:00]Matt goes, Aaron is on zoom. All the friends from college. We all come over to Russell's place And see his place. And everybody gets to meet Suzanne Russell. What do you think of this great idea That I asked her on the podcast? I would do a great job of, I could be a bartender, But if I had to sheet too many drinks, I'd pray you'll want me. Sorry, Russell, go ahead. First thing I would probably do Is take them out for pizza. Pizza in Minnesota is way better Than pizza in New York City. We always hear about New York City pizza. Next thing we're going to hear about the bagels And waters different from the Hudson. Bagels are better in Minneapolis Than they are in New York. Pizza is better here too. Matt, anything else that they need To try while they're here or not? I mean, the people are just nicer in general. We don't have all the rats. We don't have all the mice Just floating around everything. Just a nice little walk around the town Without having to worry about a rat

[45:00]And on on your ankle. Guys, Matt, are we going to have A party at Russell's or what? Matt, come on. We should, right? It doesn't sound like it. Russell, come on. You know what, Russell? I'll bring a crudity. Matt, what are you going to bring? I'll bring a couple bags of chips. John, what are you going to bring? John, what are you going to bring? Well, if Matt's bringing the Doritos And I'll bring something else. Does anybody else want to see Russell's apartment? I want to see Russell's place. I'll bring hot dogs. Russell, you bring double eggs. Second part, Aaron earlier mentioned The eight, the coffee that was pooped out By the animal. Aaron, tell us about that. Yeah, civet coffee. It's what, Indonesian? And I had a friend. Yeah, I think my friend went to Bali And brought some back for me. Now, Aaron, explain to us what this coffee is. This is coffee that.

[46:00]So civets, which are related to a cat, I believe they eat the coffee beans And then poop them out. And something about their digestive tract Is supposed to change the flavor Of the coffee. And I mean, I don't think it would. I didn't find it to be anything spectacular. I thought, but yeah, but it's like a, And I think it's They'll charge like $35 a pound for this stuff. But yeah, I was, somebody gave it to me as a gift. Don't you have a civet that lives with you? Yeah, I got a civet. Yeah, I just, yeah, I just, the civet. I know you have that cat or civet from the neighborhood lady. Yeah. They're wild, but they live in his house Collecting the civet's poop. And then it's, I don't even know if civet is the correct way To pronounce that, but that's what I've assumed. But yeah, I have tried the coffee. It didn't like blow me away. Can you imagine getting, You get a job at the civets coffee factory And you're like, oh boy. I hope I get a job where I'm Working upstairs and writing papers And stuff like that. And maybe doing some ads. And then they were like, Okay, put on these big gloves

[47:00]And this mask and you're like, Oh no, I'm sifting through the poop Looking for the beans. That's the worst job here. Honey, how was your day? I'm going to tell you right now. Not great. Remember what my job is? Looking through animal poop, Looking for little beans That people will then grind And make into coffee and say, Man, I don't know. Not that great. I think I'd lost between, I would say I lost between Five to seven second dates When I told women online dates What the coffee company was running at. I mean, that would be a cup of coffee Where it was like extra muddy. You'd be like, I don't know about this. Extra muddy? Yeah. Grounds at the bottom. You're like, oh, I don't like this. Oh, honey, I had a great day at the factory. Yeah. Oh, I found so many beans. What? I lost that. I could get a, I might be one of the best bean finders Ever seen. It's like a truffle dog. Hey, thanks for coming to my kids'

[48:00]Birthday party. Why don't you grab a beer out of there? So what do you do? Listen, I, I'm just going to ask you To not ask me that. Okay. Please. I preferred that. I did get a, I did get a positive performance review. Oh, geez. Hey, Pour more beans out of that shit. Got it. Send. Magic Mike, If you're looking for dating advice Every time just pretend that you're bartender, That's what he does for his other job To pay the rent. Hey, can you work a double shift today? No. No. Look at this. Look at the beans I found. There's not that many. Just tell me at least, Do people like this coffee? No, they think it's okay. They don't really see what the difference is. You know all those beans? Yeah. Yeah. You know how you used to work at that factory Where you didn't have to sift through poop To find these? They actually think those tastes the same. So what are we doing here?

[49:00]Like in the big sense, Like the world, I mean, who knows, Crazy world, right? Rolling going. Russell, How's it going with you? Hi, man. I really hate to do this. I'm going to go down the poop train here. We're doing more poop topics here. This bugs me. This is rare. This is rare for me, Russell. We're here for you. I don't know what to do. I guess I can eat it more. Your stance is too wide. Back-to-back days in the office, In a professional office building, Day one, I go into the bathroom. I'm using the urinal. Yeah. There's a person in the stall Taking a shit on the phone. On the phone. On a professional call. So bizarre. I've heard this. A professional call? I've heard people do this. I'm in there, And they're clearly using the bathroom In the stall. I didn't really want to start Robbing on this road,

[50:00]But... No, this... Hello? No, that was not the alarm. You wake up every morning and say hello? God, that'd be terrified. So much trust in your mute game. You've got to know your mute game is strong. You've got to not drop your phone in the toilet. No, Aaron, Aaron. You've got to slow down. They're not muting. There is a full conversation going on. This is like a Wednesday. I go in using the urinal Right next to the stall, And they are legit having a full-on conversation Where they're talking about a deal With a client. And I'm like, There is noises happening Coming from your stall While you're having this conversation. This is insane. Is this a person work with you? Am I right? Is this a person in your... No. Does this person report to you? No. I would have fired him, But I wouldn't quit. Russell, I could see where... Because when I used to do that With girls growing up... What? They'd be like, Why is it so echoey? I'd be like, I'm in my garage.

[51:00]So I had that ready. I knew right away What I was going to say to that. But then can you imagine Like you're on a call And it's just like... Listen, I know... Don't play the preview in the sound effect. I mean, that ruins it. Don't you just walk into the stall Next to that person And just flush the toilet? Matt, you're right. Matt, let me... Literally, I've worked in this office For five years. You're just flushing it For like a minute? No. I've worked in this office For five years. I've never once had this happen Where I ran into Someone who was doing that. And I was like, This is insane. Like to me, I think it would be insane If you were doing it at home. I think taking it to the next level, Doing it with a professional colleague Is beyond insane. Doing it in the office With a professional colleague Is like beyond, right? That's so bizarre. So I go in the bathroom The next day, A different person. I see him walk in And he's like doing his whole Getting ready to eat. You can tell what's going on.

[52:00]He's starting the call. He's starting a call. And here's the craziest part. It's a fucking voicemail. It goes to voicemail. And the guy is leaving a voicemail While he's in the stall. At this point, I'm like, I want to just start yelling. So instead of yelling, I just am like, I'm flushing this toilet As many times as I can. I start hitting the urinal flush Over and over. I'm like, this is so insane. And you can hear him. You got to do what you can. You can hear him. He was going in there thinking He was going to have Be able to just have his conversation. And he realizes while he's on the voicemail, Oh, shit, there's someone else in the room. And so I start flush And he's like having it hard. And he's having like a legit conflict. It's like, hey, We're really going to need you To make a decision on this offer. In the next couple of days here, We need a decision to move forward. And while there's nothing going on, Is this the craziest shit ever? You did the right thing, Russell.

[53:00]You did the right thing, Because I guess not going to try that again, right? How about William Huggins, Who has, William Huggins has 37,000 subscribers. Toilet flushing has been viewed 511,000 times. Can I tell you, Do you guys like this plug-in I put on my YouTube Where I can just loop videos As many times as I want? It's a good one. I mean, Aaron, I could loop any video. He has a hundred-type subscribers video More than a hundred. No, I don't like it. No. I mean, I could loop it. Any video I want, really. Oh, yeah, I was thinking it's been a while Since we did the Hot Sauce On Feed. I know all of our listeners Are hoping to hear that one. If I went into a work bathroom And someone was pouring hot sauce On their feet in the urinal, I think it would be less inappropriate Than having a professional call. Hot Sauce On Feed. Hot Sauce On Feed. Hot Sauce On Feed. Just Russell's bathroom. It just sounds like this all the time. What is going on here?

[54:00]It's making me lose my mind. So I bring this up. We've talked before. Rob is willing to, He'll go stand at a urinal with his phone. That's a Rob thing to do. I would never do that. Rob does it. But the person using the phone in the stall, What is going through their mind When they do that? I use a phone in the stall every time. No. I'm on my phone. You're not calling somebody though. You're not calling somebody. I would never call somebody on my phone ever. Ever. If they said your grandma in heaven Has a phone and you can call her once, I'd be like, listen, if she doesn't have SMS, I'm not doing it. No thank you. If it was Dirty Granny. I went to her for Dirty Granny quite a while. Rob, I think my phone's ringing. It's not the Jocko, but it's my phone's ringing. Do you hear that? Real quick, can you guys just remind me What was the Dirty Granny bit, actually? Is it just what it sounds like? Yeah, it's just the Dirty Granny. Hello?

[55:00]Hello? This is Dirty Granny. And now I'm starting to remember what I sound like. Dirty Granny. It's great to hear from you. Have you been up to anything recently? Oh yeah. You know, recently I just got this job In a new office. I really like it. But the only problem is I don't get many breaks. My boss doesn't let me go on breaks. I have to. This is kind of... I guess... And the worst part is, They take down all the cameras I set up in here. I love watching people go to the bathroom. Dirty Granny. All right. Thanks, Dirty Granny. I'm going to let you go. Don't get the COVID vaccine. Oh, Dirty Granny. I'm going to go on Matt. How's it going with you? Good. You know, one of the things I've been... It's been fun to watch on Instagram lately Is Rob and Jenny have been really gearing up for this. They got a meet coming up.

[56:00]So Rob, what's this... What are we gearing up for on the lifting side of things? Oh, yeah. I have the Arnold coming up. It's not a tool. Oh, it's that time of year. It is that time of year. It might be the last time I'm going to the Arnold Because I'm switching federations. So I'm switching federations And they don't lift at the Arnold, So this might be my final appearance. I'm cutting weight, but at this point, It doesn't look like it's happening very well. Are you going to have to go to the water cut? Yeah, because I eat too much stuff. Okay. What are your goals? How much weight are you going to lift? I can tell my kid was so my kid this morning She woke up and her jaw was like locked Because she was so stressed. What? She was like, my jaw, I can barely eat. She had to take an Oreo mega stuff, Cut it in half and stick half in her mouth. She was like, all right. What? I was like, so you can barely eat And the one thing you shove in is a half Of Oreo mega stuff. I was like, that's my kid. I love you.

[57:00]Well, how many people are you competing Against this year, Rob? In what? The Arnold. Oh, nobody. There's nobody there. It's not really a competition. You won the Arnold. Today, if you show up, you win the Arnold. No, there's nothing to win. I'm not competing against anybody. Wait, you've talked about how you're going To the Arnold and you're not competing. Well, I guess I technically am competing Against other 40 year olds, But I don't think about it like that. I don't get prize money, But I would never win because I'm too big. I'm too heavy. Guys are doing twice their body weight. I can't do that. I just can't. It's a scale based on your body weight. No, it's much more boring than that. It's a very complicated formula called dots. Dots. Yeah. And I get killed on dots. So I'm just going to set some American records. That's what I'm going for. Where are we guys? I'm lost in the sauce. Ready to talk about that. Hey, if you guys send your upstairs roommate A text apology about the blaring music

[58:00]That came through the Bluetooth speaker That scared the shit out of him And you don't get a response, Is that a problem? It's fine. You can just leave in the basement. Yeah. Just go up in the morning. Russell, take out that Bigfoot poster You have in the basement and fall asleep. He's got that picture of Bigfoot Walking like this. You know, where it's all blurry. It's like me watching Japanese porn is Russell Looking at cryptid porn of Bigfoot. Just blur it out. Hey, Rob, if you squint just right, It looks like a chupacabra. Yes. By the way, the fact that you guys didn't laugh At my Japanese porn blurred out joke Shows me that you're not watching as much porn As I am. It turns out once again, That was a deep cut porn joke Because of the way they censor Japanese porno videos. Didn't know that. Yeah, I didn't either. All right. Let's talk about Beyoncé Renaissance. This is her seventh album. This is the first person. She's the first person to do it six times, But she's the first person to seven albums,

[59:00]Seven albums debut at number one. Wow. This was made during the pandemic and basically Beyoncé had the goal of throwing it back To club dance music and kind of like the way, You know, Taylor escaped is coming up With this fictional character, fictional place. The way Beyoncé escaped was basically A time machine of like, Hey, Let's go black back in time. Go back to the clubs, talk about dance music And how it's time and how dance music is originally Like this black music coming out of Chicago, Especially with the house stuff. We're going to talk about a little bit. Black queer music. Yeah. Black queer music. Thank you. And so she comes out with Renaissance again, Kind of a surprise album coming out. I remember when it got dropped, Like her sitting on the horse. And this was nominated for four Grammys, One best dance electronica. And like Aaron mentioned before, It was up for album of the year. Did not win it. She still has not won an album of the year. She was beat by Harry's house. Yeah. Oh my God. Harry's house. I mean, that was not bad, but I mean, it doesn't.

[1:00:00]It's like 493 on the list. It's fine. It's like enjoyable, but come on. So then, and if you're interested, This is kind of timely. We're actually doing time in this pretty well. Her act to Renaissance act to just came out this week. And it is a country themed album, Which is what it, how fun. Yeah. I mean, as soon as you heard the track on lemonade, You're like, well, she's got to do a country album. Something like it's, it's in her for sure. I mean, it's going to be fun. This is fun now that she's in her kind of, She's in her era for a theme part of her career. I like it. I love it. I think it's great. This ain't Texas ain't no hold them. Let's get into Renaissance. That girl, you get the tone of the album right away. Right. House, Chicago house. I've tried to mark what people thought the different Sounds were because I am not as familiar with house music. I'm not either. I, I did a lot of reading about it when this came out Because I played this thing so much when it came out, But I don't know much about the history of. Aaron, can I just say one thing?

[1:01:00]Yeah. Well, it sounds like maybe I better educate you With a very quick list. I would love to be educated. Right when math out there are no lists tonight. It turns out I do have a list. And this is a quick list. Oh, because Aaron, I said to Aaron, Please research house music for tonight. Let me know what you find. Aaron pulls a Rob on Rob. He pulls a double Rob Russell. Yeah. You listen to figure it out. He sends me an article and says, Here, look at this. I haven't looked at this yet, but you can. It's like the lazy shit. The reason I had looked at it was because I already ran Out of free articles on OprahDaily.com Because I was reading Linnae Denise's Review of Renaissance. And then I clicked on a link in there And took me here and I was already out Of articles on OprahDaily.com. Please stop. Please stop. Please stop. Please stop. Please stop. You ran out of articles. You hit your daily limit on OprahDaily.com. And yeah, I hit my limit. They found me out.

[1:02:00]I couldn't reach for free anymore. That's wild that you hit too many articles. I just want to tell you the years, The history of house music. First of all, we have Mr. Fingers. This is from 1986. This is early house coming out of Chicago. It's called House Russell because it was played In a warehouse sometime. Oh, and a club called The Warehouse, right? Aaron, do you know what a warehouse is? Is it like where werewolves live? It's a house with a full moon. Listen to me. And we heard a little bit of this even with like, The relationship this is a natural extension Of disco, right? And we heard that relationship when we talked About the Bee Gees copying that drum loop To make staying alive, right? It's kind of the same idea with this four On the floor rhythm. Next up, 1991. We're going all the way up to Frankie Knuckles, A name you hear over and over When you're talking about house. This is the whistle song.

[1:03:00]This is a really fun song. I'm transfixed by this, Aaron. I got to say, you said this was a fun song. I was going to make fun of you, but you're right. I mean, you can't not love it. Yeah, like I played some of these tonight Before I played Renaissance. And I was like, why don't I listen to more house music? Imagine getting disciplined by your mom Because your back's too messy to this song. You can't do it, can you? No. So what are some of the hallmarks Of these songs we're listening to? Is it like the drum beat? Or what's the thing that connects them? So it really is like, we've got percussion breaks, right? It's a true four on the floor rhythm. Like it's a constant driving rhythm. It's up tempo. And we're starting to see more kind of changes In tempos too. Like it's just this, and it's pretty much, It's usually instrumental, although, Russell,

[1:04:00]Listen to this, I want to show you What this transformed into in the 90s Because you will know this song. This song is an absolute bop. Yeah, it is a bop. Like Crystal Waters who was quoted When this Beyonce album came out and said, Thank God somebody's releasing a dance album So everybody can remind it of songs like this. Gypsy Woman. This is a bop, Russell. Wait till the beat drops here. Okay, fast forward till the beat drops. Yeah. Ooh, so good. I love Crystal Waters. That's just fun. Her other song, Erin, 100% pure. Pure. So good. Finally, by C.C. Penicent. Russell, you remember this song, don't you? This is such a great song. Finally! Yes. This is it. Ooh. Yeah, this is really what, yeah,

[1:05:00]Beyonce's pulling from, right, When she's making an album of this. This got all the way up to top five On the Billboard 100. Ooh. All about dancing, Russell, having a good time. And I'll just play one more. I wanted to play one more recent one. This is 365 by Honey Love. This is 2002, Russell. And this all is from a list that Oprah Daly sent Erin About what to listen to before he listened To Beyonce's Renaissance. And so we did it. We set the stage. This is 2022, right? Oh, yes. Sorry, 2022. We haven't done a ton of electronic stuff. This is, I like it. It's fun. Anytime I listen to it, I wish I listened To it more. And it's fun that in 2020, Taylor Swift knew that everyone needed something Introspective, some storytelling. Everyone's sitting at home. And in whatever this was 2022 or 2023, Beyonce was like, Everyone needs to get back out, dance.

[1:06:00]People got to remember what's fun. And then Drake was feeling the same vibe, right? Because honestly, never mind came out the same weekend. And he was also on the dance musical. Totally. It's kind of fun. Guys, a lot of fun stuff came out during The pandemic and some stuff that actually Kind of ruins your life. A little hit or miss. Yeah. That was a great list, Rob. And of course I'm talking about the vaccine. At work, I play, I think it's Mellow House. It was like a Mellow House station, Which is pretty good just to have out of the background. But. Oh, good. You know where I would like to live? You'll never guess. Mellow Yellow House. I had one guess. That's what I was going to guess. Can you get like Mountain Dew, But make it flatter somehow? I think it's always flatter. It's never as crispy as Mountain Dew. Hey, can I get a Mountain Dew? Oh, would a Mellow Yellow be okay? No, not at all. I what Russell, I finally did say in a restaurant the other day, Somebody said, Dipeps, you okay? I said, no. That's not what I'm going to do it. See what you do instead.

[1:07:00]You just said, no, thanks. You need good water. Yeah. I gained self-respect. I was like, I'm not just going to get. It's good for you, man. Dipepsi. I'm too good for this world. You know where they start Mellow Yellow at? Where's that? Cole's Resort. They have Mellow Yellow up at Cole's Resort. On tap? Not on tap, but they have it in the cooler Because one of their key employees Loves a Mellow Yellow at the end of his shift. They got Mellow Yellow up there. Just Cole's Resort. Oh, I like that. I like that. I'm still a little traumatized by Mellow Yellow Because one of my favorite NASCAR drivers, That was their car. And they got a terrible head injury And they didn't know if they'd ever be able to race again. No. They found a little religion where They had to fly up into outer space. On science. But yet there was a volcano on the cover When I was watching the ads for Dianetics all the time. I was like, this book looks fucking sweet as hell. There's a huge volcano. This book is right up my alley.

[1:08:00]And then we take all that Mellow Yellow money And we go buy a bunch of real estate. In fact, we buy the most real estate Of anyone in the country. Did you guys get, Did you guys see a Scientology commercial During the Super Bowl? Yeah. No, I didn't, Darren. Did you see it? Super weird, man. Listen, if they would send us some money, They could sponsor this podcast. So reach out, please. Cozy. They said this is deep house. It does the tempo is slower, actually, Than some of those tracks we are just listening to. I got to say, guys, walking around today With this on my headphones. Good time. Good time. Good time. I don't have my headphones turned on. Alien superstar. Weird house. Yeah. This is the one that to the degree there was any, She's got bars.

[1:09:00]Look at that. He's going. Drift intravenous. Now, can I just say this? I see criticism. I guess, especially since like rock and roll hall fame nominees Come out where they say, well Some of these rock and roll guys, They were doing it just themselves. And you look at a Beyonce album And there's a million people working on each song. And it's true. If you look at Wikipedia, Who contributed to each song? Yeah. 10, 12 people a song easy. And I got to tell you, I don't give a shit. I think this album sounds so good because of it. I hire a bazillion people. You're making awesome songs. She doesn't hide from it. It's all in the credits. It's not like Michael Jackson. Totally. Well, I believe on one of these songs, She does rip someone off. I believe she ripped off the milkshake song. Let's pull this out. No, no, no, no. Oh, that was a little bit of a controversy. You're right. That's energy. I'll jump ahead to that, Russell.

[1:10:00]This is energy. A little bit of a thing. Yeah. She put on the label. She put on the album That this is an interpolation of Keyless's milkshake. She didn't get permission though, right? But because she didn't ask Keyless in person, Keyless was offended and said, Well, this is bullshit. She should have asked me. And so Beyonce said, Okay, and then took off on the notes That it was interpolated. I think she took the interpolation out, right? Did she? I think so. I think so. I think she just didn't give her credit. Maybe I'm wrong. Who knows? We want to look that up. That'd be interesting, actually. I just can't imagine that Keyless is there. So I have a question. This is, I think, a fair question. We've had albums before where we've said, Hey, they've got like, We listened to one a few weeks ago where it was, Who's the band? Who's the famous backup band? The second wrecking crew?

[1:11:00]Like the wrecking crew, And we've said, hey, The reason this is good is because They got the wrecking crew. We've listened to other ones where it's like, Is Beyonce controlling all this stuff? Is she producing it? We have been critical in the past of somewhere They've got all these other musicians coming in And really adding all the sound. Is that a factor here or not? Or do you think about that or no? I do. I don't know if it's good or bad, But I'm looking at Alien Superstar. There's 24 people that are writing credits on it, And there's one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, Eight or nine, That have producing credits on it. I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing. It could still be an amazing song, An amazing album, right? Yeah, but I mean, but that's nuts. Isn't that nuts to have 24 people? Is it writing? I don't know. It is a lot. It is a lot, but it's like, If you're telling me that she's not in control Of what that sounds like at the end, Or at least that's fine. She's number one on all of them.

[1:12:00]I mean, she's got to, Even if she's not, She still is the driving force, And it's her image that's on the line for the song. You know what I mean? Like nobody cares if Drake helped write a song. They're not going to say, Oh, Drake's bad, listen to this Beyonce song. They're going to say, Oh, listen to this bad Beyonce song. It doesn't bother me at all. To me, like Part of being like an amazing artist, If you can bring in other people to make your sound Like stronger and add something else, Like why would you not do that? That reminds me, We're doing back did it better tryouts. Back did it better tryouts. Do you want to be a coast on back did it better? Feel free to come on in. We're going to try you out. Okay. When I do some funny bits. Okay. About the Bob of Boba Fett stuff earlier. Okay. I mean, it's been most of her career. Right. She's, she's a figurehead. She's the biggest piece of a big machine. She's the CEO. Yeah. Yeah. She is the CEO. And I think she's moving into and, But I don't think anyone else could have made this album For whatever reason. And I feel that she's moving into this point in her career Where she's a documentarian.

[1:13:00]She's, it's going to be the same with the country. I'm the country. I'm going to have a ton of collaborators and she will be Touching every point on the country. Music is very cool. Especially as it relates to black people and all like Everything she's producing now is going to go to the Smithsonian. She's making documentaries about different Types of music and where it stands and where it's Gone and where it's going, which is cool. And yeah, she's using a big team to do it. Erin, once again, you're brilliant. And Russell, I have to say this. Do you think anybody at a Beyonce record is using Their phone in the stall? Like, do you think anybody is going right from that doing That? And then saying, I better make a phone call in the bathroom. Like, are you we've talked before About how, like, what Rob's life would be like, how His vacations are not like Jay-Z's and Beyonce's. Like, could Rob, if he was one of the Producers call up the queen bee and be like, Hey, I've got a thought on track seven. Oh, wow. And meanwhile he's, he's just here.

[1:14:00]And you hear Russell flushing a hundred times in The background. I don't think Beyonce, I got to think Beyonce is Not talking to you if you have a foil flush in The background. That is just that's beneath their station for Sure. The song we skipped. Cuff it. This was the second single. Got Niles Rodgers on guitar. Right. This is so catchy, isn't it? Of course, she had also from the death Song. This is such a great song. It is amazing. You guys know this way better than I do. But even when you're talking about this country, I haven't like followed all the news with it. I think it's just out recently. As far as I know, I don't even know. Yeah, it's just the first single. The whole thing. She talked by the news about it, Russell. Which was the album where we said if she did Country, she would be the biggest country star There is, right? It was lemonade. Yeah. You could pick all these genres and you're Like, if she just did pick one of these, She would be the best at it. It's credit to her. It's amazing. Yeah. Break my soul. This is the anthem, right?

[1:15:00]Like this is the... Now, Russell, this is a interpolation Or a hobby. Russell, does that sound familiar to you? It does sound familiar. I don't know what it's from though. That's because it is... You got to show me love. I mean, sampled is not even the right word, right? It's like a... Yeah, it's like a cover almost. It's like a cover. Are we working? Robin S, show me love. Oh, see this? Classic house from the 90s. Yeah, the whole play great stuff. I mean, Russell, this is when men were Their underwear slightly sticking out of their pants So you could read what kind of underwear they were wearing. So when men were men... Only the Calvin Klein models. This song reminds me of jacking off to the grind a lot.

[1:16:00]It's not going to lie. And Joe needs moments like you have Steven Tyler. Oh, wait. Joe Dan Cortez. Oh, no. Listen, when you come to Kurt Loder, The rest of your day is uphill from there. Robin, were you ever at the mall Picking up some new underwear? You're like, I need to get something Where the people can clearly tell The brand that I'm wearing. I need to change and get something Where the brand's sticking out for you. It never occurred to me that I should be caring About what brand my underwear is. You know what I mean? That was thick. I saw something on TikTok Where they're selling underwear where you can buy the size And then you buy the pouch size that comes separately So you can customize the size of your legs And the size of the pouch. Hey, no, I need the bigger waist With the smaller pouch. No, you mean the bigger pouch. Not the Linda Johnson ones. I want the John Popper pre-weight loss ones.

[1:17:00]That's what I'm looking for. It is, because I had a pair of pouch size. Because what they did is it had size of the underwear. This would be so cheap. And then it would relate the pouch size to a ball. So you could get anywhere from golf ball Up to soft ball. No. I'm not going to lie. As I get older, I'm becoming a soft ball guy. When you got to go into the big and small store On that odd light store, that's not good. Big and small? Big and small. You get the small and big section over here And the big and big over here And then the big and small is back up. You don't understand. I'm looking for the big and small section. Yeah. No, no, no, no. Not that part is big. No, no, no.

[1:18:00]I know you're confused by the way I look at this shirt And the cut of these jeans. But no, I'm looking for the big and small section. Big and small. I'd keep them in business forever. Oh boy. Now see there, now there, I feel like I listened. Because I wanted to hear what pouch size You would relate to what ball size. Your pouch would relate to what ball. I listened and nobody said anything. Aaron, if you could just pick one ball, Aaron, For a pouch size for underwear, what would you prefer? I'll edit this out. Tennis ball? Breed hockey? The cross ball? I don't know. Cross ball is kind of small. We're talking about both of your nads, right? We're talking about two nads too. Got to fit in there. Yeah. You could fit two nads into a lacrosse ball. I mean, maybe like one of those high wiffle balls.

[1:19:00]Oh my God. I was thinking bowling ball, 10 pounds. 10 pounds, not even the eight pounder. What about one of the ski balls? The ski balls are good. Yeah, ski balls, that's a little big. Somebody showed up with underwear, Wearing ski ball size, you'd be like, that's big. That's the thing about ski balls, they were so big. I'm looking for the big and ski ball size. Aaron, we talked about this last week. Aaron, the drum machine. This whole thing is predicated on drum machine, right? Sure, yeah, that's the genre, yeah. I guess Aaron just doesn't like it when Lannis does it. When Lannis does the drum machine, he shits on it. I mean, that's central to what they're doing here. It's supposed to be a repetitive sound. Plastic off the sofa. This is a song about why she likes her husband.

[1:20:00]I thought for sure that her, I thought for sure that Solange Must have collaborated on this one, but I didn't see it anywhere in the credits. It sounds like a Solange song too. What would my wife write about me, about why she likes me? This is such a nice song. Like what do I bring to the table? Like if your spouse got mad because he wanted to watch UFC Every Saturday night, that would bug you, right? I mean, to be fair, like if you're being criticized for like Not watching the paper, like you're watching like the ESPN, UFC's, you got a problem. Oh no, is that true? If you're doing the pay-per-views, it's five, But like if you're doing like the ESPN, that's not good. Whether in the eight-pace or whatever, that's not good. Okay, well, I'll let that person know that. That's actually another thing. Another thing he actually values a lot in his life And it has been doing for quite some time, very often. Speaking of relationships in the sofa,

[1:21:00]My upstairs roommate and I have found a new show that we've been watching. They watch without me. And then when I come back, I will watch episodes of this show. And it's become uncomfortable recently because the upstairs roommate Cries regularly during watching the show. It is this is us. Have you guys ever seen this is us? Isn't that supposed to make people cry? It feels like that's like a parenthood. I think so, but we had a very uncomfortable moment where there was a, There was a lot of crying going on over one of the episodes today And I didn't know how to react. I'm uncomfortable with the crying. Just cry along, just get into it. Nope, nope. Russ and Aaron, have you lost your mind? Yeah, a little. I mean, a little. Listen Aaron I would be crying. I cried at a TikTok the other day. I did. I would sit there crying my eyes out about it. So sad. Here's the thing. Russell, how did you know this is a safe space? I want to remind you how did you react to them crying?

[1:22:00]I got uncomfortable. Did you get now? Let me ask you. Cause this is something that happens. That's fine. Did you get mad? Cause I've had that response. Why are you crying? Something like that. Oh, I didn't get mad. I don't get mad. Okay. Neither do I. All right. Virgo's groove. Another thing. Normal stuff going on over the Robahouse. This is another sex song, Aaron. You know, I love a Beyonce sex song. I mean, right? What's better? She does it better than almost anybody. Lock in right now, right? It's like, what if Beyonce did a sex song And then Luda was a guest on the track? That'd be the best sex song. I like the keys on that one. Disco funk. This one has Grace Jones on it. Wow. And an artist from Nigeria named Tim.

[1:23:00]They kind of get some Afro beats here on this. Move out of the way. Move out of the way. I want to play this part cause Grace Jones is on this. I mean, you want to call back to black dance music. Right. That's, it's kind of hitting the nail on his head. She knows who to call. All right. Now, of course, I know Grace Jones from James Bond Where she was a woman who tried to choke people with their legs. I thought about that a lot growing up. The beats, the house music, the Afro beats, And this is so different than some of the other Beyonce albums. Like how do you compare this? Like we had the one, what's the, we've, We've had a few of them where I got, I thought, I think the last Beyonce, When I listened to the wrong one by accident And it was like, how is this one not higher? The songs are so good. Like how do you compare this to where other albums, They're, they're all just killers, aren't they? Yeah.

[1:24:00]And this one's so different. This one's so different from the others. And like this was really Every track we're not going to like listen to a track to track, But the tracks flow into one another. It was sort of, There's a lot written about how this was made to sound Like a dance floor piece that was supposed to be like A full DJ session. You know, like she really is what she was, You know, she just captured what she was going for. Eated. Drake has a writing credit on this one. He says, Monday I'm overrated, Tuesday you're on my dick. It's the perfect line. I'm like, oh, you don't want me and then I'm so great. I gotta say. And this is, Is this the one where she talks about her uncle Johnny? Cause this was the one, The one criticism I read about the album was that, You know, is she appropriating queer culture? And this goes back to alien superstar. Cause I think when she's, When she's doing that category call out, That's directly lifted from some very specific dance floor stuff

[1:25:00]That went on like in the eighties. And so I think a lot was made of that. She had this uncle who was he a cross dresser? Or I couldn't, or trans or not. I'm not sure exactly, But I think she does shout him out here, But that's the one sort of thing I read about, You know, is she, Is this homage or is it appropriation? And it's really like only she could do it. Cause Madonna got it a lot worse for Vogue. You brought that up. Madonna kind of had the same feedback on her album. Right. Right. Yeah. It would be hard to do dance music though and not get, You know, and, And how do you give a credit to that appropriately? Like if that's not who you are, That would be so tough. Yeah. Thick little trap beats. I wish I could have a break in Dosh's track about my body. You can make one. Russell do it. Soft ball pouch. Guys, when are we switching over to

[1:26:00]Tiny weights? What age can we just do that? Ever. What? Never even thought about it. Never even considered it. Isn't that something where you just turn in age And you just have to... Oh no. I think our parents grew up at a different age Where that's all they had. But all was in 1800s, Rob. Yeah. Okay. That was good. Don't bring it out right now. Don't bring those out. I thought they wanted to see him, But they don't. They don't like him anymore. No, in the 1900s. Okay. Anyway. What were you guys saying? All up in your mind, This is referred to as hyper pop. What? Who refers to this? That's, I've never heard of that. What? This is all the having to define everything. No. That's because I love it. I love defining dance, Like music types. Oh, I love defining things. Scientists and me. I mean, something called hyper pop?

[1:27:00]Sounds awesome. F-Man. Half pop. Hyper pop. Murphy. Oh, I got you. He's coming. He's coming. We spent too much time together. America has a problem. Yeah, the price of Big Macs. It's $17. Dude, there's been multiple. I thought this was a joke. There's been multiple articles about all this. You know, here's my question. All these people are complaining about it. Don't go to fucking McDonald's. If the damn cheeseburger is too much Or the fries are too expensive, Don't go. Right? Not good for you. What are we talking about? Well, I think, That's for a lot of things in life though, To Russell. What the? Come on. Russell, I'm just going to say this. I forgot Kendrick goes on that track. The fries. The fries are so good at McDonald's. Now listen, Did we have a traumatic experience this summer? Yes. Because my kids have officially switched off happy meals

[1:28:00]And are now on 10-piece chicken nugget meals. Russell, do you know what the bill is When myself, my mom, And my kids go to McDonald's this summer? Probably $50. $60. It was $60, Russell. I paid $60 to McDonald's. But you'd probably pay $100 If you guys went to Applebee's, right? That's less than you paid at Noodle's, right? It is less than I paid at Noodle's. Oh, fuck. Don't even make me think of that. Russell, I am Russell at Applebee's. I'm getting one. All you can eat riblets. Everyone else is getting waters. We're ripping them off. Right saps after 9 o'clock. Get in main riblets as you want. Hey, you want to order yourself a Spike Lemonade? Go ahead. I believe they're electric Lemonades, Rob. Electric Lemonade. Electric Lemonade. That's what it is. Yeah, that was... She was comparing herself to cocaine on that one. So I thought I'd air it up again. No, that was Matt who did the cocaine in the bathroom. Pure honey. This song is two parts.

[1:29:00]Hang on. You got to play it from the beginning And I got to hear it because I've never... Check my technique. Yeah, I never knew. That's what he was saying. Coming for my technique. You want to feel my technique. It's sampling a song called Bad. Right. It's pure bad bitches to the left. Oh. Money bitches to the right. Now, Russell, if they said bad bitches to the left, Where are you going? What? On the left. You consider yourself a bad bitch, Russell? I don't know. Russell. Did you get Russell like I did to her yet? You're not a bad bitch. We've had albums that inspire A lot of embarrassing sing-alongs for me. This one inspires a lot of embarrassing dance moves In the kitchen. Like this is not an album Where I should be around other people. Aaron, I saw what you did just sitting in the chair And I got to say I need more of it. Okay. That's uncomfortable. If that's wrong, you better lock me up And throw away the ghee baby

[1:30:00]Because I don't want to be right. All right. Put me in the face-off prison Where they have the boots, The magnetic boots, Because I love that dance And I thought it was great. This is the second part. Honey. All the pretty boys too. Disco throwback. Whoa. This is so good. Yeah. Like the sun just came in. And she continues this disco With the last song. Summer Renaissance. Calling out, not calling out, But giving tribute to Donna Summers. Renaissance rebirth. So kind of doing like a dance, Rebirth, motif, Maybe smart guys to figure out. Aaron, 10 through 10. What do you think of this as a have sex 2 album? I mean, it's a 10, right? Like 10. It's gotta be a 10. I mean, this... Yeah.

[1:31:00]I peel off my tidy whiteies that Have the smallest pouch size. The gray penis. Where did I get those rustles? What section again? Big and small. Big and small. No, no, no. You don't understand. I'm not looking for the regular size. I want the longer ties That I know is going to cover my belly button And I want a corresponding pair of underwear That is very tight And does not have a lot of room down there. Not the Linda Johnson section. I'm looking for the big and small, The Howard Taft section. I was suspicious when Russell said, Hey, when you guys put on tidy whiteies, Does it feel like boxers to you? And I was like, Russell, that's... Your pouch is too big. It's big and small. Now, Matt, let me ask you this. You don't have... Because I have to have a pair of tidy whiteies To lift in. So sometimes I just wear them Like when I'm feeling... They don't have to be white, though. You could choose a different color.

[1:32:00]No, I get... Sorry, you're asking me. I'm sorry. I get like... I buy splotchy ones online. They're more expensive, but... They've got lots of blotches down there. Anyway. So they got to be the briefs. They can't hang on the... They can't be on your thighs. That's what you're saying. Right, yeah. They got to be the briefs. So I'll tell you what, though. When I wear those, like underneath... I feel like I have a little sexy secret. Okay, I'm not gonna lie. I feel faster. I feel like I can walk faster. And I'm like, nobody knows that I got these sexy panties on. I think Rob, though, generally wears... We've seen Rob stand up in the Zoom enough. Oh. I think Rob just wears... What I would consider tidy whiteies normally. I think that's a normal thing. We have come to this point in the show Where I regret to inform you. There has been... There has been a change. In Rob's underwear. He's been wearing... I used to wear the bamboo small ones With the huge pouch.

[1:33:00]Had to stop that. Then started getting cheaper ones Where they would sell it by 20packs On boot.com. 20packs. Unfortunately... What is going on? Unfortunately... Because my dog eats them. We go through so many underwear here Because my dog eats them all. What? Can't you, like, put him in A thing with a top? Listen, this guy ate another pair Of my headphones the other day. Okay, he is ravenous. You have to look out for him. We already talked about the party. What happened there? Yikes. Now... I have gone all the way To non-synthetic Boxers from Amazon. They are Totally square. There is no pouch whatsoever. They are officially Old people boxers. Like boxers? Like, they're just, like, fully loose? They are fully loose. Wow. Good news is, End of the day, they smell great. That natural fabric. You don't need to smell them. You don't need to smell those. That they smell. My dog doesn't even eat them.

[1:34:00]He doesn't even want them. Yeah, he doesn't smell any sort of funk On there whatsoever. They're great. Unfortunately, they're the least Sexy underwear I've ever owned. Oh, it is officially the end. No sexy secrets. It is the end of my Time with sexy underwear. Fucking damn it. Type, you... And the words of Barry From Burnsville prove it. Stand up. Let's see it. I don't have Them on right now. I am currently wearing sexy underwear. Gotcha. Hey, but let's what? This is doing better, Aaron. Okay. I'm going to take off my military whites here. I'm going to show you Aaron is saluting, Which is appropriate, Russell. He's still wearing tiny whiteies. Sexy underwear. Your call is at an end. Rob is such a big guy to wear Tiny whiteies. They look so small on it, don't they? Yeah, they do. Be in the 90s.

[1:35:00]Big pouch. Big pouch. Big and small. I regret to inform you sexy underwear Will soon be no more. Thanks to boring Amazon boxers That I bought. Speaking of, Rob, you might need to keep The trumpet playing. Bob Marley legend got knocked out. If we would have never done legend, Can I share what bits we would have Never done? Wow. That's so important. We need to do this. Matt is dying. We did the Russ game of no woman, No cry. So I was giving you guys what I did Out of a trip. No woman, no cry. Matt was giving us some summer jams. Or Aaron was. Matt was trying to find the poop deck In the new office. So another poop story for this episode. Oh, no. That was a good one, man. Rob doesn't have a blender. Aaron was upset about Rob not having a blender For some reason.

[1:36:00]Yeah. He can make smoothies, man. We also did. This would have been a big whiff. The best chorus first songs where we all Sang build me a buttercup on the episode. Build me a buttercup singing is a classic bit. That's true. It's a hard one to pull off. It's a good one. So that's what we would have missed. I think we probably could have done without it. That's episode. Not like this one, Russell. Put this one in the best of the boxer stuff. People are loving it. Can you imagine your John? Your John, you log out. And then we have the boxers. Bulge size conversation. He's going to be like, shit. We also, this was also the impetus for Rob's Joke about, why are there no lines At men's bathrooms at public pools? It's. Wow. I mean, John logging off Before we did our boxers both twice. It'd be like walking home, Walking out of game six of the world series Before pocket like sends it.

[1:37:00]It's just, you're missing history. What are you doing? Listen, this is the rating system, Matt. Okay. Don't hold us back anymore. Don't hold us up. Renaissance. Yancy. Rolling well toned at 71. That means it's perfect. We should be right here. Rolling. Boned. Okay. It should be even higher up on the list. Unfortunately, today folks, It is illegal to pick rolling groan. Okay. You cannot pick that because we will be harassed online. If you remember, Kid Rock said something bad about Beyonce. And for the next five years, His Instagram was just bees. Everybody would comment bees on a million times. Okay. And to his response, he said, I would have bought. I bought with a body. Dig a dang diggy. Jump to the boogie. Bang to bang. Bang to dang diggy. Yeah. Which is judges. What's your name? It's kid Rock. Then he told everybody his name.

[1:38:00]He told everybody his name. That my name is kid Rock. My parents were rich. It turns out. Actually said my name is kid. Kid Rock. Oh, that's right. Better if he said my name is Rock. Kid Rock. Chris Rock. Chris. The Rock. Yeah. This is the Rock. This is the Rock. Can you smell? Not anymore. Got the boxers on Amazon. By the way, Also point in your life where you're buying clothes that don't smell. Got to think about where you are. Got to think about what's going on in your life. Got to fix things up. Okay. Anyway, Aaron, what do you think? Rolling well toned. Rolling. Yes. When, When every shirt you have to buy is like a sweat wicking shirt. You might have a problem. Yeah. He might sweat a lot. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, I don't have deodorant in my desk at work because I have Forgotten to put on deodorant that many times. Like that's why I am 43 years old. Just put on deodorant every morning. What are you doing? Where do you get distracted by? Answer my phone. It's right there.

[1:39:00]I love it. Got it in the bathroom with me in the morning. Give me that phone. Aaron, What do you think? Rolling well toned, Rolling bone or rolling growing. Now remember, Aaron, We are at album 71. Yeah. Okay. Are you back in that mode? Legend. No, this was Exodus, Which remember the parody song was the stud Russ. Well, Help us out. What's at 70? What's at 70 and what's at 72 right now? Where are we? Like help orient us to where we are. All right. 70. Okay. So we're on the list. And of course last week, Straight out of Compton. Remember last week, We did straight out of Compton, Which remember all our great bits from that album. 72 is Harvest, Neil Young. Wow. Geez. Listen to the ones leading up to this flash. We'll start with her husband, 67. Reasonable doubt. Yeah. 68 hounds of love. 69. Jagged little pill straight out of Compton. Then Renaissance is coming right in before Harvest. Loveless by my bloody Valentine college. Dropout by Kanye and Lady Soul by Aretha. [100:00] That's now I do. [100:02] It's very tall. [100:03] I want to remind you that Harvest,

[1:40:00]of course, is the song that I made where I legitimately had to apologize to Aaron after playing a song. [100:12] Because it was a song about how miserable your life would be. [100:15] Aaron, I am your wife. [100:17] I remember that. [100:18] That is sick that Aaron. [100:19] No, don't make me laugh at it. [100:20] Don't make me laugh. [100:21] But I'm just going to say, I love this album. [100:24] I listen to it so much when it came out. [100:26] I do listen to this fairly regularly. [100:28] So I'm biased because I love it. [100:31] I think I'm going to just call it Rolling Well Tone. [100:33] I think it's actually better than some of those things that were lower on the list, but I don't know that it's as good as a couple of things that came after, but I'm very glad it's on the list. [100:41] I'm very glad it exists. [100:43] Rolling Well Tone. [100:45] I wouldn't bias it, Aaron. [100:46] You can just stream it. [100:47] Russell, Rolling Well Tone, Rolling Bone or Rolling Drone? [100:51] I'm going to go a little bit different route. [100:53] I really enjoy listening to it. [100:54] The first time I listened to it was a little different. [100:56] I didn't really know what to expect. [100:58] It caught me off guard a little bit. [100:59] The second time I started enjoying it more and more,

[1:41:00]I think it'll come back to listen to it. [101:03] But I'm going to say, we haven't heard I Am Sasha Fierce. [101:07] I Am Sasha Fierce on this album as if I were a boy, Halo, Ave Maria and Single Ladies. [101:15] I'm sorry. [101:16] I need to hear I Am Sasha Fierce. [101:18] I'm going to say it's Rolling Grown because I think a different Beyonce album should be up higher. [101:22] That would have three or four commercial hits. [101:24] I'm sure all these on the new album are hits too. [101:27] But I'm going to take I Am Sasha Fierce. [101:29] I'm going to say Rolling Grown. [101:30] I wanted a different Beyonce album in that spot. [101:33] And I've got Matt, Rolling Well Tone, Rolling Bone, Rolling Grown, Beyonce Renaissance. [101:39] And I do want to say, I forgot my opening joke of, I've got three guys here who are disappointed because they didn't see any winches with low-cut shirts. [101:48] Not that kind of Renaissance, folks. [101:51] Where's the turkey legs? [101:55] I think this is a great album. [101:57] Do I think it should be at 71? [101:59] So now we've got three Beyonce albums in the top 100. [102:03] I mean, it just feels like eventually that should happen. [102:06] I just don't know if it should happen right now. [102:09] Like this is instantly go to number 71

[1:42:00]of the greatest albums of all time. [102:14] No, I don't think so. [102:16] I don't want to say that it doesn't belong here, but it just feels like it should have came in like, been in the 200s and then down to maybe low 100s and worked its way up kind of a thing. [102:26] You have to age like a fine wine a little bit, right? [102:28] Yeah this will age out some of those Rolling Stones and Bob Dylan ones. [102:33] So instead of having 13, maybe down to three or four, just the gradual way things happen. [102:39] So I don't know. [102:41] I'll just say it's fine here. [102:43] And maybe they did it because this is where it fell in the list. [102:47] I think it's probably better than the Taylor album in terms of listed ability for me. [102:54] Well, I don't know. [102:55] It's 100 spots ahead of it. [102:57] Yeah, that's weird. [102:58] I don't know in itself, but so I don't know. [103:01] How much of it is just the fact

[1:43:00]that they wanted to not mess with the list too much. [103:07] They just wanted to fill in different things. [103:09] It just feels like once everything gets reallocated next time they do the list in a year or two, and we have to do this whole process over again. [103:19] It's going to be a little different. [103:21] So I don't know. [103:22] I'll just say it's rolling well-toned, but it's weird. [103:25] All right. [103:26] Unfortunately, you guys, of course, are incorrect. [103:31] This gets a rolling history less own. [103:35] Okay. [103:36] To appreciate this album, all you need to do is do some history, a little research on the history of dance music in the U.S. [103:43] much like I did on my website, OprahDaily.com, which I had to buy a membership to because I went over my daily views. [103:51] All right. [103:52] Next up, we're going to essentially from MTV to VH1. [103:57] All right. [103:58] I've seen fire and I've seen rain. [104:00] Who wrote this Captain Planet? [104:04] He's a hero. [104:06] Is it James Taylor? [104:08] You know what? [104:09] I don't get rustles when I said

[1:44:00]where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? [104:12] She was in Thailand. [104:15] She was on a work trip. [104:18] All I thought about the whole week is doing a parody called where in the world is Robbie Sandiego? [104:23] About him like being in the Carnival Court hotel room, getting with the dober's wife. [104:30] There's your chance, Russell. [104:32] You just hear me in that room. [104:34] Bop, bop. [104:36] You know, that's Mbop. [104:38] I was doing Mbop. [104:39] Maybe you had a confusion there. [104:41] Ooh. [104:42] But you're just too lazy to look it up online. [104:47] If you want to hear from guys who chant He not only has three in the top 500, three in the top 80, three in the top 90, and then no more. [104:56] So I am Sasha Fierce's nunner? [104:58] No, I'm a nunner. [104:59] Whoa. [105:00] Let's try to find Sasha Fierce or what? [105:03] Let's see if it's not. [105:05] Wow. [105:06] Aaron, it's time to wake up, Aaron. [105:08] Oh. [105:09] It's all been a dream. [105:10] It's Saturday. [105:11] You're going to record two episodes with the guys today. [105:13] I can't wait. [105:14] I'm so excited. [105:15] Aaron, what the fuck is your alarm going off? [105:19] It's time to say goodbye. [105:24] Guys, can I just say this? [105:26] Aaron's Wi-Fi went out. [105:28] I did get a text message from him. [105:31] Okay. [105:32] Let's see what's wrong with Aaron's computer. [105:36] And I want to remind you I did this way earlier tonight. [105:39] Sorry, my computer broke. [105:41] I found Drake's newest video in the small and big section.