Drake: Take Care (2011)

[00:00]In 2020, four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums as decided by Rolling Stone magazine. This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music, excoriated the order, and led us to making this podcast. We are far from experts. We promise to do almost no research. All opinions are our own unless you disagree. Please sit back and enjoy. Beck did it better. We are up to album 95. This is Take Care by Drake. Uh, Aaron got all excited because he caught this. This was podcast was called Take Hair. I'm hoping, man. One of these times, this guy collects bags of hair. He, uh, if you, if you went in his closet, it's just bags of hair that he has labeled by date. He's got bags of it. That sounds like a serial. I'm not going to say it. That sounds like a bad situation. No, no, no. I think if you were over at some place and they were like, oh yeah, this is our bags of hair that I've been collecting. I think that's totally fine. And you put it on. You put it on. You put it on. You're like, oh, this is what I'd look like with hair. That is right up there with collecting your cat hair and then like making a sweater out of it.

[01:01]What? Oh, man. Would you even know that? Matt knows what's erotic. That's the thing. All right. Let's, let's stop talking about all this erotic stuff and let's turn on K-Rob. Hey everybody. Welcome to K-Rob. So no more erotic talk. Listen, I got a little story to tell the children. So tell them to come on in, sit down in front of the computer and listen to old Rob tell you a story about his friend, Aaron. Oh, yeah. My name is Aaron and I love feet. They're exciting. I like to make believe they're inside me. I put all 10 toes in my. What? When I. It's a bit. I still love feet. I know it's kinky. I like my women's shoes. Extra stinky. I like the long toes right under my nose. This is the greatest song you've ever come up with. You're like, I'm not even on this album. What do you want to do about the greatest albums of all time? It's not on the album. Is that? It's a tan. It's a tan. Okay. I got to admit. Guys, I got to admit something.

[02:01]That was a fake opening song. Fake out? That was a fake out. That was so great though. When I was saying that Aaron likes to put feet inside of his rectum, that somebody would stop me and say, this is too much. But you didn't. All you guys just smiled at me with it. No, no. Aaron said stop. Aaron said stop. It's true. I did. Well, I wasn't listening to Aaron. Oh, God, Rob. Rectum. Damn near killed him. Aaron, that's a song you can play for your kids sometime. If you really want to try to explain that on this album once again. Oh, well, that album's not on the list. I looked it up. All right. Let's get into K-Rob. K-R-O-B. What's up, everybody? Welcome to K-Rob. K-R-O-B. Listen, the other day I went on Facebook asking for advice on the podcast. I didn't get quite what I wanted, but it's a good thing. It didn't bother. Just let it slide off my back. I'm asking for Facebook comments, but these people are incompetent. They're giving me advice, but I didn't ask for none of it. I'm saying every night that they often eat a bag of dicks. I didn't ask you, dumb fuck, what it is that you would fix.

[03:01]Parody song in the back? Well, that idea is whack. If you don't get all the jokes, then just go and listen back. If you haven't listened to every ep, then you can lick my sack. Don't tell me what you think when I didn't ask for that. If you listen to just five minutes, then just shut your fucking trap. I'll listen to your opinion like my fucking Zodiac. Watch how to even listen to some dumb fucking hack. Your podcast is probably... Like audio Prozac. Oh, you chode. Down such a fucking load. I look at you like you're my personal commode. Luckily, I'm impossible to goad. But what you're dumb and didn't know. You count as a download. Download, download, download. Download, download, download. Download, download, download. You're helping our fucking show. With those extra downloads and dumb shit. When you want to hear about the greatest...

[04:01]Download, download, download. Download, download, download. Like I said in the song, I don't know if you heard this. I'm impossible to goad. Yeah, impossible. I just like that, you know, like you say that every time we do like a hip hop album. Yeah. Like that, like download just goes sky high, right? We get all these people. So that's like just a great song to... Introduce everybody to this podcast. Well, I think people are going to be like, you know what? I'm a Drake fan, but I also want to smell stinky shoes. Is there a podcast for me? And the answer is yes, we are in. This is back to it better for all the foot freaks out there. Guys, we are talking about Take Care by Drake. We were doing all the songs on the Rolling Stone Top 500 album list. We're doing all the albums. Today, we're talking about Drake. And I've got three guys to talk about the album with me. I've got Matt in Minneapolis. Matt, how are you doing? Rob, you said it. You said at the beginning that we promised to do almost no research. Well, I promised I did zero research on this album because I couldn't wait to get on.

[05:01]We know you heard it. Zero. He's a true hero. Zero research. Zero research. I put in zero effort to this album. Matt's normally got binders and binders of research. We just never let him talk. But this time, he's just going to improv it today. A lot of graph paper. A lot of graph paper. Got out his TI-85 for this. Colored pencils, right? Is that back in the day? There's some colored pencils in there? Yeah. I've got Russell in Minnesota. Russell, how are you doing? Okay, look. I'm being honest, guys. I can't lie. I've missed you. You and the podcast are the only things that I can commit to. I never cheated on my co-host when I've been with you. But your takes on Cheetos and Nooch, guys, I don't get you. Oh! Russell, tell me you got to do the intro songs. Now, I noticed that you didn't have anything about buying pantyhose in your opening. So, I think that that's something you could work on. All right. But, guys, I know for a while, Matt, I was like, listen, we got to stop saying Aaron loves feet. And I was like, I don't think I can stop. I think I'm addicted. I think I'm fully addicted to.

[06:01]Yeah, it's your number one addiction. Oh, my God. I can't get enough. And speaking of the man, I've got Aaron out in California who was telling us earlier he's upset Dr. Strange wasn't about a doctor out getting strange. That's weird. Aaron, how are you doing? I love this podcast like they love Mac Dre in the Bay. Let's talk about Drake and take care. There we go. Dr. Strange. Dr. Strange. All right. Let's get into our voice, man. I love Rob's reinforcement of his joke. Yeah. Are you sure you guys didn't want to hear that one more time? Did we get like, did we fully get the laughs? Like, it'll be back later in the episode. Don't worry. Sometimes what I say is so subtle. It's kind of a wry humor. You know what I mean? Leave me alone. I'm like a human New Yorker cartoon. Like, you just kind of when you hear me say things, you kind of give it a little upturn like this. You can't go. You kind of upturn the mouth a little bit. Like, oh, that was. Interesting. Listen, we've got. Today's a double. Today's a double voicemail day. Today's a double voicemail.

[07:01]Yeah. D.A.D.V. Believe you would talk shit about the replacement and then go out dancing to a fucking party in the USA. What the fuck is wrong with you? Another satisfied customer. Hey, guess what? Get your money back. You dumb fuck. So, yeah. So they are mad at us about talking, making fun of the replacements and then going out and dancing to party in the USA. When did we read dancing to party in the USA? Because that sounds like a good time. I don't know what this guy was talking about. I was talking about that at a bar Abilene. You know, just hammer party in the USA. It's a good song. It's a good dancing song. I don't think everybody's been gone to the jukebox. I'm like, oh, my God, I got I got three quarters. I can't wait to play three replacement song. Song number one. I have played the replacements on the jukebox. It of course turns sad pretty quick.

[08:02]If you make the wrong choice, which which one was your favorite replacement? Monica Chandler or never gets old. Not as bad as when I once heard someone play Johnny Cash hurt on the jukebox. That one is Jesus Christ. How do I help this person? Like this is not spoon my eye out while you're at it. Right. Like a crash test dummy. So people used to play crash test on me. So there was this girl. Oh, great. Way to really bring it down. Yeah. Yeah. You need some help. Wouldn't go and change with the girls in the change room. That's why, like, I think in the 90s, I just thought I could be in a band because I saw crash test dummies. I was like, well, fuck, I guess anybody can just have a hit song. Right. Like, yeah, it's not even singing. He's just got a low voice. He's just telling a story. I feel like I can do that. You want to know what really bothers me about that song? It's really personal.

[09:00]What is when the person's hair turns from a regular color to bright white? Yes. I feel like that's a bit personal for me. Yeah. That's something Russell can relate to. His hair. Aaron's going through all his bags. He's like, well, see, I got white in here somewhere. He goes, ah, yes, here's the white hair. I have good story. Not me. I've got a full. I've got a full head of gorgeous brown hair. And it's. It's only getting thicker and fuller over time. So I don't know what it is. I look great. Actually, every time I bend over now to deadlift on a video, I can just see my bald spot is getting bigger and bigger. And I'm like, at some point, am I going to have to shave my head? Like, Aaron, what made you want to shave your head? Because I think if I shave my head like somebody like I feel like when I shave my head, it's going to look like like putting on a condom for the first time, you know, where you don't unroll it far enough. So it's like squishing everything down and it's like forcing. That's what my shaved head is going to look like. It's going to be all lumpy and weird. The best part of this. This is Rob's Bill Simmons ask asking me a question. And then I was so annoyed when you interrupted my answer.

[10:02]You got to give me time to answer. Yeah. So, Aaron, will my head look like a full up condom? And by the way, I'm assuming condoms look weird for everyone the first time they put it on. Maybe. Why are you looking at the condom? Like, I mean. Oh, yeah. I'm just going to put on a condom and then not look at myself in the mirror. You psycho. Guys, there's lots of other stuff to look at. And that's. Oh, yeah. There's actually. Oh, yeah. I'm at home putting on a condom for the first time. What am I going to do? Oh, I don't know. Not look at it. Get out of here. You guys. I've been going to, you know, all these events like dinner in the dark. A few weeks ago, I went to this thing called putting condoms on in the dark where I couldn't even see it. It was wild. You hear Russell. You hear Russell. He was chewing the wrapper opener. Like, is that all you can hear? Right. Is chewing. Russell's dates like, hey, how's it going? He's like. It's the condom. It's on my head. I don't know how this is going to work. Wait, you put the condom on your head? What? I couldn't read the directions.

[11:00]It's so dark. I didn't squeeze the tip. Is this bad? I didn't squeeze the tip. I'm trying to get this thing open. I'm trying to get this thing open for you. Aaron, why did you decide to shave your head back in the day? I decided to shave my head because I think I've told this story before. I lived my first year out of undergrad. I lived with a friend of mine, a friend of ours in a house. And his girlfriend also lived in the house, which if you've ever lived with your friend and his girlfriend. Yes. It's like having it's like having a second girlfriend, but without any of the benefits of the girlfriend part. So just just the part where the girlfriend says things to you like, hey, Aaron, you're kind of going bald. You might look better if you went ahead and just shave your hair. Yeah. Things of that nature. So I was hearing that. Which we've learned that that's sexual harassment. It's right. Yeah. And that we've learned. We did send an article. The guys did send an article to me where it says in the UK, harassing bald people is now sexual harassment. And to which I wrote back, Aaron, you sexy bitch.

[12:01]Yeah, you did. Sexy bald bitch, you said. Oh, and Aaron printed out, made it into an inspirational poster in his house. No, he just said he sent it to his lawyer. He's got copies. I think I think what I think what's telling Aaron before you continue with this story, I think what's telling is that the girlfriend was like, hey, by the way, I see you over there in my stuffed animals with your head. Where Aaron was in the room. And it's how she picked me out from the stuffed animals because she could get the bald spot. Yeah. And so. So the. One of those dolls over there is breathing so hard. Right. So that was going on. Every day a pair of my shoes goes missing, Aaron. Why? Do you know why? And then at the same time, I was I was working with with kids in a group home and it was I was I was 23 years old and it was always the same conversation. Like it'd be a new kid on the unit and I'd be talking to them and then they'd go off and do a thing and they would like walk behind me to do something. They would look at me and they say, wait, how old are you? And I'd be like. Oh, I'm 23. And they'd be like, oh, and you're going bald.

[13:01]And then like every week it was like getting roasted by a new group. That's a bummer. I was going bald. And finally, I took her advice and I was like, OK, you might be right. Maybe it won't be so bad if I just shave my head. So that was it for me. I was 23 years old. But we should tell everybody. I mean, like when I first met you, I mean, you had luscious head of hair. It was like Brad Pitt, for God's sake. Yeah. I mean, you had you had really outstanding hair and it's it's gone. A really good friend of the program. Brandon from Edina. We've talked about him. He's been on talking about the Wonderwall song and all that stuff. He he got voted best hair in high school. And now, you know, do you kiss it? That's not a joke. No, you did not get voted best hair. It's 100 percent true. Come on. It's 100 percent true. Would you would you would you take that deal every time, though? Rob, if someone could have told you back in high school, you would have won best hair. But right now you'd be bald when you've taken the deal. No, because I won best smile in high school. So I already have. I already had one locked up. I already had one of the superlatives locked up and I went to like a big school.

[14:01]So that's that's impressive. I told you the story, right, where I won best smile. And then the picture of the yearbook is me smiling real big. And the woman that also won kind of looking at me like, what the fuck? This guy is the best smile. Because if you look at my teeth, I have small teeth. Look at what? Look at this. Do you see how small my teeth are there? It's like my middle finger. I've got a little anything like hanging off my body is just small. And I'm going to go back and wish I hadn't said that. But I can't edit it out. I can't edit that out. I can't edit that out. Matt, did you ever win best anything at high school? No awards. No. No. Yeah. I actually I was best kisser, but that was an award I made up and put on the letter jacket and signed in the yearbook. Right. Yeah. And I wore it to college a ton. I actually fell for it. I don't remember. I didn't get anything for like the whole school wide. But I remember I was actually in choir. Aaron knows that I was in choir in high school. I do know that. I was talking about that with my lady this weekend. They gave out awards like those types of awards. Best whatever. Best whatever. And I think almost I think everyone had to get one. And I ended up there. So there was a male and female man and woman won like each of the awards, whatever it was.

[15:03]And I ended up winning best waddle, like best essentially, essentially, like essentially like the portly guy walk. I got the best. I did. I did win. I won. I got biggest. I was the biggest brown noser. Oh, really? What? Yeah. Because you were a wife of one of our friends, one of our listeners. Her and I, we were the biggest brown nosers. I get that. I can see that. He's always saying nice things about me behind your guys's back when you're not around. He's on our double secret text chains. We're talking about documentaries and restaurants and stuff. I'll tell you what. Aaron might have won best hair. But what's weird is when his dad voted, he was second best air. Second best air. I get it. We're only doing one voicemail. Yeah. Fuck that second voicemail. Well, I'll say that. No, I lied. All right. All right. Oh, yeah. Just like Aaron lied about not stealing those shoes from the roommate that one time.

[16:03]Guys, can I share some big important news with you guys before we get into this? It's kind of like a life changing type thing that I think is important for the podcast. No, we're pretty busy. So, you know how we've been talking about a lot of things lately. Important things. Well, this week, my big announcement is I went and bought some hard Mountain Dew. Have you guys seen the new hard Mountain Dew is out? The zero sugar, zero carb Mountain Dew. Have you guys gotten this stuff? Zero sugar. Zero carb Mountain Dew. It's hard Mountain Dew. Alcohol Mountain Dew, man. Oh, yeah. It's like a truly or a white claw, but Mountain Dew. What is in the Mountain Dew? I don't know. There's I'm eating. I'm drinking the Baja flavor. Baja blast. Hard Mountain Dew. I love Baja blast. So you go to Taco Bell and you get a Baja blast freeze where it's like, oh, it's so good. This has got booze in it, Rob. Oh, my God. I would have been drinking all the time as a young man if they would have had hard Mountain Dew. Oh, my God. Oh, weird.

[17:00]It seems like that might be the idea behind this sort of thing. So when you bought that, Russell, how much shame were you fooled with going up to the counter and having just a thing of hard Mountain Dew? I went and I actually I picked it up and I went and put it on the counter and then went and bought the rest of my stuff just so nobody walked by me while I was holding it. Well, I mean, is it good? What does it taste like? Yeah, it's pretty. It's very good, actually. I would highly recommend it. I've only had the Baja blast, but I would say go check it out. Is there like an alcohol content? I mean, like. Is it like an equivalent to a beer or what? It's 5% alcohol. I think it would be like a White Claw or a Truly or any of the other kind of hard seltzers. So that was my personal news I needed to share with you guys. That is like. I mean, we've been waiting all week, like wondering if there was any personal news. I mean, it's been a while since we talked. Yeah. We've been on pins and needles. Like, is there anything? If I'm being honest, that's the biggest personal news I could think of. Russell saying, I mean, that's just huge to me. I've made a I've made a big commitment to the Baja blast. Matt, I'm happy to share with you guys. Matt, maybe had some different ideas.

[18:01]Matt's got some other thoughts. Russell, you know, he's he's been out there playing the field, but he's ready to commit to one alcoholic drink for the summer. And it's hard Mountain Dew. Watermelon, zero sugar, hard Mountain Dew. Yeah. Or flavors. I mean, if you I feel like if you went to a doctor and you're like, listen, I can't get an erection. I haven't got one in three months. The doctor's like, listen, are you drinking hard Mountain Dew? Like, this is something we're seeing. Like, if they said, by the way, hard Mountain Dew. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. By the way, all boners. I'd be like, you know what? I get that. That makes sense. We definitely we definitely did not get an accidental text from Russell this week asking some random person if they wanted to truly when he had already picked out. Could have been. We don't know. Wrong thread. True. Wrong thread situation. Right. And we reacted normally and was not a big deal. Listen, rolling going. What are you up to this week? Aaron rolling going. How's it going with you? Hey, it's going great. I had a I had a I had a dad's gone wild weekend last weekend. One of our. Yeah, I went out to to Phoenix, Arizona to meet one of our listeners.

[19:04]Had a super fun time. We got to record on a weekday because Aaron was out on a dad's gone wild weekend. That's right. That's what I said. Yeah. I messed up the whole recording schedule because I was out there being a dad gone wild. Played some golf. Had some time in the lazy river. Are you guys lazy river people? Do you guys do the lazy? Wait a minute. Shut up. So you went for a dad's night or dad's weekend and you're in a lazy river. That is with a kid. Hell yeah. That I barely go into the lazy river with my kids. It's so fucking boring. That's the thing. Have you ever been there by yourself? Just like in an inner tube, just like drinking tequila and floating, floating around the lazy river. It's amazing. And then if you notice everyone else in there are kids and their parents are standing to the side. Like, that's true. That's true. I mean, we were in there on Friday and no one else was in there. It was amazing. And to Rob's point, did you see anybody get out and go to use the restroom? Men's restroom at the water park. Always chlorine in there, right? There's I mean, there's chlorine. We took a shower after. It's fine. So. So. So. So what else did you do?

[20:00]Go to like Legoland and then like. No, I mean, it was like we went to brunch. We went to dinner. Pizza with Bianco. No. No museums this time. You guys got to check out this video at this museum. I couldn't stay because my son wanted to stay too long, but we got to check it out. Watch some basketball. Went to. We did some Topgolf. Topgolf is like bowling for golf. It's amazing. Agreed. I still haven't done Topgolf. This was my first time. It's delightful. Like, you don't have to be good at golf. No, not at all. Not at all. It's totally great. I am good at golf. Would it be fun for me? Yes. Good. I was also. I took a flight, obviously, to get to Phoenix. A flight? Was it a night flight or was it a day? I took a flight. It was a day flight. No, it was a flight tonight. I like that I get the special acoustic version. The Joni Mitchell version. Flight tonight. Go ahead. Russell, just as it occurred to you as in the last one, I did move your singing. So it matched up with the song. So it didn't sound like you were singing. It didn't sound like you were having some sort of breakdown.

[21:02]Well, you let it go the first 12 weeks. 12 weeks? Is that all we've been doing this thing? I forgot about that. I flew to Phoenix and then on my way home from Phoenix on Sunday, there were two gentlemen sitting in front of me. Wait, you flew home too? Yeah. All right. Oh, my God. These are the stories that I like. All right. All right. I can't do it. There were two gentlemen sitting in front of me who were like becoming, they had just met, they were becoming best friends on the flight. Have you guys ever seen this? That would never be me. Absolutely. No, me neither. Hell no, me neither. But these guys would be coming. Did they have to be compressed up or down? Well, they were leaning across the aisle to each other. Oh, no. Yeah. And one of them turned out to be. It's so much next to you, you can't get away. It's across the aisle. I mean, jeez. These guys, oh, they were loving it. They were loving it so much. Just eating it up. These two dudes just like yucking it up, having fun. The one guy. Give me one thing they were talking about. I'm going to give you one thing they're talking about. I will, Rob, if you let me talk. In fact. So the one guy, I had to look him up. His name is John Schaefer. He's a special teams coach for the Indoor Football League Bay Area Panthers.

[22:04]He was an NFL long snapper for the Niners. How do you know their names? Yeah. Because he was telling everyone. I had to look him up. He was telling everybody that he was his coach for the Bay Area Panthers. He was very loud. Like, this whole thing was like. You were on a plane that did like an icebreaker? It's like, okay, everybody turn. This dude was loud. So he was, yeah, they were making all kinds of friends. My name is Aaron. I'm bringing an apple. But I'll tell you one other thing they were talking about. So the two dudes make like fast friends and they're exchanging numbers. And the, you know, the football coach signs a football to give to the other guy's grandson and whatever. And then they're just like totally like they're going to be best friends for life. And then they finally get around to like introducing each other by name. And so it's like, oh, I'm, you know, I'm John. And the guy's like, I'm Ron. And then, you know, Ron's wife happens to be there. So he says, oh, yeah, this is my wife. I can't remember the wife's name. I'm Blonde. And the guy, John, the football coach, looks at the guy's wife and he says. He like sticks his. Arm. He's a big guy. Sticks his arm all the way across the aisle and points right at her.

[23:02]And he says, you look just like my girlfriend. You could be twins. You and my girlfriend. And then he was like, and like the woman was totally dark hair. And he's like, I mean, my girlfriend's blonde. But otherwise, you guys look totally like you could be sisters. And I was like, this is getting weird. Like, this feels like a very odd way to be. And you, the guy behind us who's taking off his pants. We could see you two. Stop doing that. I've been on flights with Matt before. At least one. And I don't think we said a word. To each other. And I think we sat there without. He said on a runway for two hours. I'm not talking to anyone on a plane. No, I mean, either. These guys talked the entire flight. Start to finish. Then in the bag claim, they were still talking. It was like, it was like a, like a buddy comedy. I don't know. Like, there's a bug. Whenever when people are talking, it just bugs the hell out of me. And there's always. And usually it's not two guys that I see. Usually it's like some middle-aged guy and some hot lady that are sitting next to each other. So the guy feels like obligated to like, oh, hey, so what are you doing? What are you doing? And it's like, shut the fuck up.

[24:00]And she's like too nice to be like, shut up. Yeah. Well, and then half the time, the really bad ones are when then she is like half in the bag. And so she is just jabbering. That's like, it's like the unicorn and the four moons line up with the Mars and all that. And it's like, and they're so loud and they start getting over each other and they start having more drinks. And it's the worst because nobody, one, nobody wants to have the shade up so that the sun's shining over on them. Shut your goddamn shades. And two. Nobody wants to hear your conversations about, you know, trying to hook up with this lady when you're like 48 years old. Like, just shut up. I bet Rob is a plane talker. I have a feeling Rob talks to strangers on planes through a whole flight. Well, I was going to say, this sounds a lot like when people got mad at me for talking to the woman next to me on that Vegas flight I went on. I was so loud. And I got on a flight from New York to Vegas at like 7 p.m. And I was like, I had been drinking in the Delta lounge. I got on the plane. I was drinking on the plane. I was like, yeah, this is a plane to Vegas is a fucking party. Everyone is putting on I'm ass and going. I'm like, yeah, party time. And the woman next to me.

[25:00]And I'm talking like this loud. I'm like as loud as can be. So then I turn to everyone. So then I get a look from people on the plane and I turn and I say out loud. Oh, I don't have my hearing aid in. No, I don't wear a hearing aid. But I said that out loud because then people would be like, oh, now I feel bad that I was mad at him for being loud. So that was you know what? That's I'm sure that's actually quite wrong. I think that's I just violated. So you not only you steal valor. But you. So like pretend like you have an affliction or a handicap. And then I'm at a military. I'm at a military funeral saluting the flag. And then when they say something, I go, what? I'm doing both at the same time. Yes. No, thank you for your service. You know, stuff like that. It's no big deal. I was going to ask you guys when it comes to stolen valor. I noticed at my gym there is a parking spot for veterans right near the thing. If you were to park in that spot, would that be considered stolen? Valor that stolen valor? I think one thousand percent.

[26:01]Oh, yeah, it's that's it's you know, it's like those pregnant mother spots. Unless you're just going to be in and out real quick, don't park there. It is always hilarious to watch like two 18 year old kids pull up in their dad's car and pull into the mom and kids experience parking stall and then go into the gym. Oh, yeah, it's just hilarious. And then, yeah, how do you not as a as a person on like these two dudes were just carrying on as a person on the plane? How do you not eavesdrop on their conversation? Like, oh, how do I how am I not supposed to pay attention? Even if you don't want to? Well, you just stare at a blank screen. So you're going to hear like, right. Think of like a normal person who's like trying to watch a movie and it's already loud with everything going on and trying to turn that thing up and get your. Yeah. How much special teams is even an indoor fucking football? He's got to be on the field like once a game. Like probably not much. He's like, oh, yeah, we're really working on our kicking game. No, you're not. Nobody. We just want to see Bob. That's why we're watching indoor football. I mean, if we're watching indoor football, we're doing it for one reason.

[27:02]We are gambling on it. There is no other reason to watch it. None whatsoever. We couldn't give two shits about. I mean, can you imagine if you're like, oh, yeah, I'm ready to I want to coach in the NFL or NCAA. Where have you coached for? Oh, the indoor football league. Oh, I see. All your kickoff returns are drawn up for five guys. Well, yeah, they're, you know, that was part of the rule. You pick it into that big net all the time. Right into the wall. Yeah, totally. I mean, I'm pretty sure I saw Kurt Warner playing. I probably actually saw. I saw Willis Jaycox, not Kurt Warner, but I went to some indoor arena league games back in the original arena league at the Veterans Memorial Auditorium with the Iowa Barnstormers, which still exists, by the way. That was on, by the way, a dad's weekend. He was on. He was like, OK, is that for some arena league football? OK, the tickets cost minus twenty dollars. That doesn't even make sense. They're going to pay us to go into the stadium. So, Aaron, did these guys walk to the baggage claim altogether and continue their conversation? Because that's where I think it gets weird is they did. If you were to slightly chat up someone on a plane for five minutes, the awkward part is getting off and where you're walking together and you

[28:00]got to decide someone's got to fake a bathroom break. Someone's got to break away from that. Yeah, they did. And more than that. Oh, God, my stomach. Oh, I can. They all walk to the bag claim together. And then Ron left his wife with John and Ron went to get the car. And John and Ron's wife were waiting for bags together. I don't know, man. It was it was getting weird. That was it. That was my rolling claim. Trying to think of a baggage, a dirty baggage claim joke. And it's really. It's got to be like a stuck joke, right? Couldn't someone get stuck? Oh, no, I fell into the baggage claim and I'm stuck halfway through going into the airport. Let me help you out there. I've heard about layovers, but this is ridiculous. Russell, how's it going with you? Rolling going. Things are going great. I was mentioning earlier that I've been to a few of these events by fever up the dinner in the dark. I went to another event this last week. I think I was telling you guys about it.

[29:00]It was called it was called Bach and the Beatles. It was a string quartet concert at a church in downtown Minneapolis, a big, beautiful church in Minneapolis in the dark. So there's no lights. Thirteen hundred candles. So probably five, six hundred candles up on the stage. Oh, my God. And then candles throughout the rest of the church. And you went in and you guys were like this. Fifty minute concert in and out and under an hour. Matt, it is your style. So we go. No, not for a concert, man. Like I need my three hour Pearl Jam concert. No, I need my thirty five songs smashing pumpkins. What if you're sitting in a church pew, though, Matt? Yeah, that's OK. Maybe 50 minutes is good. So, hey, hey, I got a problem here. I've got some I've got a bad back. Oh, I'm sorry. These pews not working for you. No, this group is terrible. This is bad Bach. Bad Bach. Hello, sir. You're the eighth person I've heard make that joke today. So one of the things we've talked about dinner in the dark before. How do you get there?

[30:00]This one was a little bit more treacherous. Rob, you asked before. How did you get around? The room was very dark and we were sitting in the balcony up in the balcony of the church. So the upper level and walking through a balcony of a church in the dark is a nightmare. It was a miracle. I didn't fall over the ledge. Oh, yeah. I mean, steps are steep. Sometimes they're really thin. Right. Or like, yeah, short ones. And then you don't know. And then sometimes they're really tall. And yeah. And walking through the pews. We're trying to get through like those really narrow pews. You get from one side to the other. The other is not. It's a risk. And passing by every single person and saying, P.U. P.U.? P. You know what? I'm not going to apologize for that. That was a good joke. So we go to this event and I thought I could share some of the songs that they played. So if you were going to go to a concert and they were going to play Bach and the Beatles, what would you want the ratio of classical music to Beatles music to be? What do you think is the right ratio? I think one Bach to two Beatles.

[31:00]I think one Bach to two Beatles song. Aaron? I was going to go one to one. I think if it's 50 minutes, that's short. I'd go one to one. That's a good point. Matt, what about you? How many Bach to Beatles songs would you require? I mean, it feels like, I don't know. It feels like it. Yeah, I'll go one to one. So they ended up playing. It was about 40% Bach. The rest was Beatles. So it was about four Bach songs. 65% Beatles. And the rest were Beatles. So one thing I wasn't a huge fan of is. They didn't interweave anything. They didn't go back and forth. It was like, here are the four Bach songs we're going to play. They played them. And then they would introduce the other songs. So it was all Bach at the beginning and all Beatles at the end. It feels like you could have like wove them in. Yeah. Yeah. I don't like that. I'd like them to switch off a bit. That's weird. They put Beatles on the Bach end. Now, at any point, did you turn when like the cello player sat down and were you like, wow, baby got Bach? Baby got Bach.

[32:03]I do not. Boo. Boo. I do not objectify the cello players. Let me see if I can guess which Beatles. I want to see if I can guess. I thought we could start with the Bach music first because we are a Bach did it better podcast. So I thought I could share some of the music that we played. Okay. Rob might have a song cue or two there. But one of the Bach songs that played was Bach cello suite number one and G major. You guys know this one? Yeah. The famous one. Yeah. This is in the dark of the church. I think you might have been to the wrong place. Boy, Bach was more advanced than you would think. Pickle juice. They're much creakier than you would have expected. It got loud in the dark. Bach had like 16 kids, man. He was like, yeah, he was like the our friend Darren of the Baroque age. Bach loved to fuck. That's just the way it is. A lot of his songs. He's like, oh, I want to fugue so hard. Is that a good joke? That's a good joke. I want to fugue you so bad.

[33:01]I want to fugue you like an animal. Yeah. Yeah. It sounds like. I want to smell your shoes. It sounds like he never got cock-bocked by his. Hey, Mozart, Beethoven, bro. Don't. If you want to. You guys will know that song. But I was. They told you a little bit of all the songs in this one. They said, Aaron, I don't know if you know this, but this was like not played for 200 years after Bach died. It was not really for a long time. Then it became famous again in like the 70s. And then Yo-Yo Ma has made it famous again in the last however many years, 20, 30 years. It is beautiful. Well, you know. You know, you know why they, you know why that wasn't played. Why? Is that they went to Bach's grave and they heard the scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch. And they're like, what's going on? What's going on? So they open up Bach's tomb and there is Bach. And he's got his music and he's got that song, which we all know. And we don't need to say the title again. Okay. And, and I'm not going to make a Bach door joke. So don't even think about that. But he's got his music and he's erasing it. All right. And they said, well, what are you doing?

[34:00]And he says, I'm decomposing. I'm decomposing. God, I tried so hard not to laugh. I really didn't want to. I didn't want to give him satisfaction. Good jokes are good jokes. Rob, do you know if the composer Charles Gnode is also decomposing? Because they also played a song from the composer Charles Gnode. And this is Ave Maria, which was actually inspired by Bach. Aaron, did you know that you're a musical, classical music guy? I wouldn't have known that. I know Gnode from his operas, Romeo, Juliet, and some others. But so supposedly I knew that. You could do that. I did Gnode that. So it was about a hundred years later. They were listening to this. And they, he essentially wrote this while listening to Bach and kind of superimposed the two. Do you think this music was for fucking too? Like music is now like, is this like their doves? This is the Drake. Yeah. What would be a new equivalent in the 1700s? I like how all of us have different songs in our head when we think about fucking to a song.

[35:02]Party in the USA. It's like, oh, you know, you know, the one song, you know, wait, you know, the one song that anybody has, I'm going to, I'm going to go downtown at you. But my Bucky, but my Bucky. Russell's got it. I'll tell you, I'll tell you the one song, the one song that none of us and nobody ever has when they're talking about fucking is anything by the replacements. I can tell you that. That dude is not good. Wait. Yeah. I'll tell you what, when Jenny comes in and she hears Chumbawamba playing. Yeah. She knows. Jesus. She knows. She knows. She knows. Na, na, na, na. Na, na, na. We can knock down. This bar is a Chumbawamba bar. Please don't play any Bach. The jukebox. The jukebox. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Jukebox. Jukebox hero.

[36:00]Did I just invent something where it's a jukebox, but it's just classical music and it's called a jukebox. Oh my God. Jukebox hero. So Russell, how fucking smart are you going to a classical music concert? Like you are so, you're the fucking smartest guy I know. This is crazy. I have to say these guys did a, everyone should go check out this website. Fever up. Go to one of these shows. They do a great job of playing music, but then also just giving you a little bit of info. Not too much. Just a little bit. But they give you like a buy one, get one free or like a punch card. So if you go to eight, you get the ninth one free. Man, I don't know. One of our listeners bought the tickets to this event. Oh, so he didn't go. It's one thing. I love going to arts things for dumb people though, where they're like, this is Bach. It's classical music. There are no words. And you're like, Hmm, am I cultured now? So they played about 10 Beatles songs. I'll just rattle them off quick. And then I had two quick ones I needed to share with you guys. Can I guess one? Yeah, go for it. In my life.

[37:00]Yes. Good choice. That was in friends. That's when Phoebe got married. And that's when I heard it. And they had a real. Oh, geez. Four string quartet playing it. And it's beautiful. Some of the other ones were hold your hand. This one by the boys to men. I believe did it first yesterday. Boys to men. You were just listening to this. I was just listening to it. Blackbird, Strawberry Fields. All you need is love. Michelle, love me do. Hey, Jude, here comes the sun. Come together. But then they did two that I thought were really important. If you're going to connect them to Bach. First was Eleanor. Go ahead, Rob. Well, I was going to say Bach in the USSR. They didn't play that one. Oh, what the fuck? They're missing out. Maybe they did. But I was sitting too far in the Bach of the church. And I couldn't hear it from back there. Get Bach. Get Bach. One they did play was Eleanor Rigby. And an interesting thing about that was they there were two string quartets on that one. If you guys remember that. Oh, we remember that. That's an important song in the history of this podcast. Oh, my God. Did you have a flashback, Russell, to moving shit around?

[38:01]I did have a flashback to being in the limo. And one of the things they said about that was, I don't know if you guys remember this, but. Paul McCartney wanted those the string players right up against the microphones for like a really biting sound. But they didn't do that because they weren't used to doing that. So they backed away. And this song never sounded the way McCartney wanted it to. You guys know that? That's so strange, right? But it sounds just how Cisco wanted it in the song. Oh, my God. And again, if you haven't listened to like episode eight, you might not know that Cisco is the single greatest story. He dyed his hair gray. He said when he wrote the thong song, it was just like Moses finding the tablets. That's how big of a deal it was. So just like Moses's hair went gray. Cisco was like, I shall not. Thou shall not have dumps like a truck, truck, truck guys like what, what, what? And then there was other one other one other Beatles song I gave you. I think Rob in my life. The other one they said was actually really inspired by Bach.

[39:01]This is the one where they sped up the piano. If you guys remember. And it sounds like a harpsichord. It is. Do you hear, do you hear Bach there? Oh, totally. Yeah. It sounds like a harpsichord. So I thought they did a great job of taking it from Bach to the Beatles. I like it. I like it. Great. Was, uh, was Michael J. Fox there? Oh, no, this could be really bad. No, no. This is, uh, we're going to go Bach in time. Ah, we're going to go Bach in time. We're going Bach to the future. You mean Bach to the future? You want to try that again? He's listening to this shit right here. He's like, hello, Johannes. This is your cousin. This is your cousin, Jake Bach. You know that sound you've been looking for? I think I got it. Bach in time. By the way, my mom is going to try to fuck me in the parking lot. Don't ask me why that's a weird thing that only comes up when you watch this movie with your kids. And they turn to you and go, is he going to have sex with his mom? And you go, I actually can't remember. I think he might at some point in one of them. It comes close, but I don't, I think there might be some like over the bra stuff, but

[40:02]it's itty. It happens. It's, I mean, if you think about it, Aaron, almost everything is over the bra stuff. On a long out of time. On a long timeline. Yes. I mean, like in my life, most of it is over the bra right now. There's only so much stuff under there. Unlatching that thing on the box, right? Always had trouble reaching on the box side to unlatch it. Don't get me started on that. Makes no sense. Can you imagine if you had to wear a bra every day? I think we've talked about, you've brought this up a few times before too. It would be a nightmare. I just wouldn't take it off. I'd be like putting it on backwards and then spinning it around. I mean, what a disaster. Matt, rolling going. How's it going with you? Good. A couple of quick things. I guess the, I've come to a realization in my life and I don't know if I'm happy about it, but you know, I've been called sir, I think too many times in the last week or so. And I don't think it's just saying like, yes, sir.

[41:00]How are we doing? It's like, oh, thank you. Thank you, sir. Here you go. Old man, sir. Yeah. Old man, sir. I don't know if I can handle that. I don't know. So I'm struggling through that. I need you guys help. You're okay. You're younger than us. You're going to, you're going to, you're going to get used to it. You're going to get used to it. It's all right. Okay. Now I think part of the problem might be you are wearing a full coat of armor around Minneapolis, right? Is that true? That's true. Yeah. Yeah. I got like that puffy hat thing on and carried my sword. Is it because you're wearing your Paul McCartney mask while you're walking around? Is it the Elton John outfit that's doing it? My Nick, my Nick Faldo mask. Is it your Ian McKellen mask that's doing the. Oh, oh, I thought this was a Renaissance fair. I'm circumcision. What? What? He's in. He's wearing a whole armor and he comes in and says, I'm circumcision. What? Like Sir Arthur. Okay. Nevermind. But it's come scission. So the other. Excuse me. I'm circum. My dad was circumcision. You can just call me scission.

[42:03]Guys, we're so good at improv. We should start a theater. Sorry. So the other good news. Well, kind of the good news of the week is that. Sorry, sir. Go ahead, sir. I have finally finished the album. Well, or the list. I did it all five. There's going to be a celebration song for this. What do we do? What do we do? Yeah, there we go. So I've made it through all 500 albums. Wow. Holy shit, man. This is a major accomplishment. And Matt, you're telling us that it gets better. They get better and better as we go. You find good. You find good albums. What was the song, Rosie? I pinged you about the far side. Yes, it was a bizarre ride or live. Cabin, California is bizarre to the far side, right? It's far side. Where is it? I got to find out a list here. Someone's got your mama. It's got passing me by, right? Or is it lab? Yeah, Russell. We're so fucked on this podcast. Do you have any idea what they're talking about?

[43:00]Any at all? No. Far side is great. The shit they're talking about. We're going to be doing like 2028. She keeps on passing me by. How do you feel about finishing? Do you feel like you need to find like a new list to accomplish or something else to work on? Or how does it impact? Your life now that you're done? Finally found it. 482. It's going to bug me. I couldn't find far side 42. No, I am happy to be done with it. I'll tell you why. Because you find some artists that you didn't know you liked. You didn't even know it was out there. I mean, like the far side, things like that. Right. And you find some that you knew are out there, but you never were forced using my air quotes because nobody's forced us to do this to listen to their albums. I don't know. It kind of feels like it now. I've got this massive list now of artists that I want to go. Kind of celebrate their entire collection. And I'm going to read off this list and see if you guys can find a theme. Okay. All right. So the first one is Arcade Fire. We've talked about them.

[44:00]We're at like 151. They're unbelievable. I've listened to all their albums. That's what I've gone to. The Pixies. Oh, good stuff. I got to go through Neil Young stuff. Well, there's seven albums on the list or whatever. All right. Beck. Beck. I want to get through all of his. Yeah. Oh, my God. Apparently, there's 1,000 Beck songs, too. He's got a lot of those, too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. They're so good. Holy shit. I don't know. Picking up any sort of. Do you like that? You like that? That rock with some edge, but then can also. I like that white rock from the late 90s. Yeah. I was going to say, it's almost like the music from when you were like 18 is like the most important music in your life. That's so weird. It's crazy, huh? I was kind of excited because there is this band called Yola Tango. That came up, you know, and I was like, oh, what is this? You know, what is this going to be? Well, it turns out that they're just a bunch of really smart white guys that went to some small college in New York and somebody from the Mets would

[45:01]always instead of, you know, you say, I got it. So Yola Tango, that's what he's saying. So whenever they were visiting white games. So it sounds like it would be some sort of band from some. Not from the US. Yeah. It sounds like it's Minuto or like. Yeah. So all of a sudden, it's the exact same thing. It's the replacements. It's the pavement. It's all of that jumbled into one. So, yeah. Well, Matt, congratulations. You're right, Matt. Yeah, dude. That's that's. So, Russell, you asked what I'm going to do now. I'm trying to get through all that. And I think I'm going to do what you had originally promised all of our dozens of listeners you're going to do. You're going to listen to the 500 albums, but then also the ones that were on the list from 2012. So I'll do that. Get up the older. Fill it in. Wow. Yeah. Wow. You know, that would probably. Good for you to report back once in a while and say, hey, this got bumped off. Should have got bumped off or stayed on. So I can't believe you guys listen to new music. That still is mind blowing to me. I listen to the same fucking Pandora station every day. I listen to like the same five songs.

[46:01]And I think I might do that until the day I die. It's all just hot for teacher. It's just I don't know what it is. It's just Morrison song. You like Rob rolling, rolling going. I was going with you. Listen, I was back in Minnesota for my birthday the other day. I got to see Russ. Matt didn't show up. He was invited. He didn't show up. It's not me. I don't want to bring it up. I don't even think it's worth bringing up. But Russ showed up and a bunch of guys from college showed up. All of my good friends showed up. Matt didn't show up, even though he was invited. Unlike me to Aaron's wedding. So where I was not invited and I also didn't go. So was this a surprise thing, Rob? Or what was it? My sister knew what I love more than anything else. And that is a surprise party. So I'm sitting there. I am in the skankiest tank top that you've ever seen. Like a string tank with like my short shorts on just lounging around. And all of a sudden, like my cousin shows up and I was like, oh, hey, this is fun. It's my birthday. I must let me know. Maybe my sister invited some of the family members over. And then all of a sudden, my buddy Steve shows up and I go, oh, hey, cool. Steve's here, too. Wait a minute. What is Steve doing here?

[47:00]Why is he here? Is that Steve? And it turns out later that he found himself in the very unenviable position of getting invited to somebody's house with a group of friends and being the only friend who showed up for the first 10 minutes. So it's just Steve and my family. That's the worst. And I know. It was that Steve, though. So it was that Steve. Yeah, that's true. It makes it a little different when you're that Steve as opposed to that Russ. Because they're like, oh, you're the one Rob's wife's been talking about. Yeah. Yeah. I thought it was strange when my sister was like, oh, hey, Steve, good to see you. Here's a big hug. And Russ, good to see you. I think a firm handshake is good. I think we're actually good. Rob, one thing about this surprise party, Aaron didn't know this at the time because I didn't clue him in because he didn't live local. But actually, your sister reached out to me and said, hey, can you get Matt to come? To the party and any of the other guys you guys went to college with? But she specifically wanted Matt there because he he is on the podcast. But he didn't show, did he? No, he didn't. I was pretty tired. That's what your point was. That's why you broke it to reiterate.

[48:00]No, no. I like that. I was actually going to say when I when she reached out and said, hey, we're going to do this party. Would you guys want to come? And then she said, you're going to have to cancel your podcast because I know you're recording that night. Yeah. And I have to say, I would have much rather done the podcast than gone to your birthday. I know we are kind of sitting there and we're talking to each other at the party. We're like, oh, what are you up to? And in my head, I'm like, rolling going. I was going with you. Do you guys find yourself more and more like when you're having conversations in real life that you're doing things like you'll make a callback to a conversation you had five minutes earlier and be like, oh, that was a good callback. That was a really clever of me. You guys have real life conversations. That sounds amazing. Yeah. I should tell this is, oh, you know, we were talking about, oh, I'm a big Twins fan. And so they just said, hey, I'm a big Twins fan. They don't know what it is. I'm mostly having conversations when I'm sitting on the plane across the aisle with this guy. Did you see that ball hit off the box? Stop. Get it. The box.

[49:00]So my sister had these old videos of us when we were young. And so we were going through and watching him. And one of them she had is a very vivid memory of mine, which was in fourth grade. The only year I played organized baseball, I was leaving for the summer. So my dad apparently begged the coach, like, hey, can he just pitch one game like this kid? He doesn't have it going on baseball wise. He can't hit a ball. He's scared. And I remember that game as kind of a traumatic incident where I did have fun pitching. And I did. I thought I did. Okay. But I remember distinctly the number of runners advancing because when the catcher would throw me the ball, I would not catch it. And then like the first time it happened, the ball went past me and like went to the outfield and the guy just ran from first to second. And I was like, well, what the fuck? He can't possibly do that. That can't possibly be the rules. And I just remember that happening over and over. And guess what? Watching this. This video of me doing it. It was the fucking catcher. This guy could not throw me the ball back. Every ball he threw back was at my feet. Like I was making these unbelievable circus catches just on there.

[50:00]And it turns out it wasn't my fault at all. And I was watching and I was like, oh, I actually am an okay pitcher. And it's the catcher's fault. This was like one of the few times in my life I had a negative thought about myself. And it turns out I was wrong. Once again, I am awesome. And it's vindicated on film. So. It was great to see. Now, I do have to say they did show me an at bat. And I think I took a video and sent it to you guys. My at bats did convince me that I had some major troubles. But I did blame the coach because I started with the bat like in front of my nose. That can't be how you teach a kid to bat, right? Holding the bat in front of your nose. So when they pitch, you got to bring it back and then swing. You start. No way I'm going to get a hit like that. I feel like I'm in therapy. So I think that's that's enough. But I was going to ask you guys. Speaking of pitching, I was down and I was watching my niece and nephew in Rochester a few weeks ago. And they're both in baseball and softball this year. I think it's their first or second year. And so I brought my glove down. We went out and played baseball, softball for about an hour each day. But I realized Uncle Russ is not a great pitcher to little kids like every other. Every third was like hitting him in the shoulder, you know, round ball way to the left.

[51:03]You know, get the fuck off the plate. One of us hit one of them. I was being one of them. And I was like, OK, we're done. Uncle Russ can't be pitching anymore. Like that's not easy. Yeah, Matt. Matt feels like he'd be a great pitcher for young kids. But are you guys do you ever pitch your kids or anything like that and have any bad moments? I've done it forever, but I was also like coaching baseball for how many years, right? So you're throwing batting, throwing back. I've had a lot of experience throwing batting practice, Russell. So I'm pretty darn good at it. Probably, probably the bet, you know, only because we have one listener who listening, who probably thinks he throws a little better BP than me, but he definitely doesn't. He kind of had a little bit like a curveball. So it was hard to hit. You know, my yeah, I was definitely a better BP pitcher. Yeah. Bad conversation. Oh, I love this. No, my son's just learned how to catch. Like he's got his little glove and he's learned how to catch. And I even like I'll I'll short him, short arm him on the underhand throw because I'm like, I don't want to hit him in the face with this ball. You know, he's only five.

[52:00]He's just learned how to catch. Yeah. And then you're going to make him think that he's bad at catching when really you're bad at throwing. It's going to mess him up for quite a bit of his life. When you're playing catch, you have to throw the ball to his glove. Yes. That's the key. That's what it is. You have to hope that your throw lands in their glove. Yes. They're not going to catch it. So no, it's got to it's got to be right on. Yeah. That's a lot of pressure, man. You don't want to mess that up. I cannot. The idea of going outside and throwing a ball back and forth with my kid is such a foreign concept. No, I'm on VR baseball. I got a season going on there. It's going great. Why do I need to bring a kid into this? Say it, Rosie. You got to say it, Rosie. You got to say it. Are you standing up or laying down when you do the VR baseball game? That was not what I was thinking, but it was better than what I was thinking. You got to say it. You got to do the thing. What the fuck do you do all day, Archie? What do you do? Tell me. I want your job. What the fuck? I'm out of here working all day. You got a VR baseball league? Yeah. You're playing VR baseball?

[53:00]Guys, just imagine a job where you not only teach the material, you also grade the material. And then that grade you give on the material you taught is how people judge whether or not you're good at your job. Oh, no. This feels like you're giving away the secrets. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. Pull back the curtain. All you guys got A's. I must be such a good teacher. Wink. You know what I mean? Well, let me think. If I give all A's, who's going to be mad? Let's see. Me? No. The kids? No. The parents? No. Grading the thing that you taught to them in your performance is based on the grade of the thing that you taught. I can tell you what nobody's ever said at once was like, when I think about important moments of my life, I think about seventh grade. Nobody's ever said that ever. Get through seventh grade. Get done with it. It's. Listen, it's the absolute worst. Sounds like getting through this album. Let's talk about the album. This album might be the absolute worst. It's the seventh grade of listening to albums. I don't know. I would say it's a lot.

[54:01]I mean, I wish I knew this album when I was in seventh grade, right? Can you imagine seventh graders now growing up to get to hear this album? Oh, you would just be. You'd be all about it. This would be what you'd hear when somebody said, hey, listen, this isn't going to work out. And you'd be like, I'm going to drive home so fast. This is the album. You'd listen to on the drive home, right? Like, you'd just be like, finally, I get to live in a Marvin's room and understand what they're saying, because I just got my ass dumped. Like, that's all I can think about when I'm hearing this album. So we're talking about Take Care by Drake. This is his second album. And Drake named it Take Care because he felt that his initial album, which was called. What was it called? Thank you for something. What was the album? Nobody cares. I don't think it was called that. That would be a terrible name for an album. But basically, his first album, he felt like it was too rushed. And he said, listen, the second album. I want to actually do a little. A little bit more singing than rapping, which now I think like a rapper, an R&B song, a guy who sings and raps normal stuff. But you got to remember, like 2011, this was absolutely revolutionary.

[55:00]Remember? Like, remember the one we heard Snoop Dogg singing for the first time when we were younger and we're like, wow, he's a terrible, terrible singer. That is that is why Drake is kind of an amazing thing. Like, he is a good singer and a good rapper. And he kind of is a good singer. I listen. Listen, this. This is the problem with Drake, right? Is that he gets this. He gets this producer, this Noah Shabib to work with, if I'm pronouncing that right. And he's not only thought of as one of the greatest artists of all time. There is nobody who is higher up on the streaming platforms than Drake. It's not even close. Like, you pick anybody. You can think of Justin Bieber or whatever. Drake blows them all out of the water. And part of that. And Herb Albert is second. And Tijuana Brass is third. I don't know how they got separated. They kind of lost their way. They've got two separate albums. Herbie Man. But he's also probably the greatest criticized rapper of all time. And I don't know if it's just because he's so successful. That was before the Jack Harlow album came out, though. And why?

[56:01]Because he showed up for my hip hop heads. Okay. We're trashing the Jack Harlow album. And so here's the thing is that, like, Drake gets so criticized that when you tell people that you're doing that, that you're doing an album on Drake, all people want to do is tell you why they don't like Drake. I'm going to edit all of it out. I got it. Why? They're going to find out why they don't like Drake. And basically, it's because, well, when you ask people, why don't you like Drake? It's like, well, he's not really hip hop enough. He didn't come from a bad enough background. But at the same time, it's like, well, every album he's released has debuted at number one. Every album he's released has a number one hit on it. Like, just because he came out when we were 30 something, does that make him not as good of an artist? I don't know. This is what this whole episode is about, right? Drake is not afraid to be cringe. I agree with that. Yeah. That's a huge power he had. And I was listening to a podcast called My Favorite Album, and they compared him with Coldplay. Where they're like, he's kind of like R&B's Coldplay, where it's like, they're cringe.

[57:01]Everybody knows it's kind of corny, and yet they still sell millions and millions. So what are we going to say, Aaron? No, let's go. Let's hear some of the album, because it's a long one. So I'll get my takes in at some point. Over My Dead Body. I'll take care of the takes. And you get the, I think right away, this gives you a good impression of what this album is going to be. I have never, ever listened to Drake. I've never sat down and put on Drake. Not me neither. I've heard him on the radio a lot. Honestly, this was tough for me to sit down and listen to. Like, I don't know if it was just the down tempo. It felt like he was complaining all the time. I don't know. Russ, what did you think? Did any of us enjoy this album? Like, I don't want to give away the ending, but nobody's listening. It's pretty long. I thought some of the songs were pretty interesting. Some of them were jams. I like the faster songs with more of the rapping. Some of the slower songs were just not what I'm looking for. But there's so many slow songs on this album. I mean, it's crazy. Shot for me, this is what, this is all about breaking up with somebody. And isn't The Weeknd the writer on this one?

[58:01]Wasn't he on four or five of these songs? He's on a bunch of these. The Weeknd's on a bunch of these, yeah. And sometimes you don't know when it's The Weeknd singing or Drake singing. They obviously were sharing a lot of stuff back and forth. That's, they sounded so similar on this. Yeah. But when you look at where The Weeknd is now, you're like, wow, Drake really nailed it with Drake. Yeah. It's a shame you didn't keep it. Yeah, I mean, The Weeknd's, he's like a top five pop star, right? It's like. Yeah, if you were going to say, hey, here's a guy who's going to have all these hits. And by the way, his name is The Weeknd. I'd be like, well, no, that's wrong. There's no way somebody named The Weeknd is going to be a huge star. He's going to be great in Uncle John's. Uncle John's. Uncle John's. Here we have Headlines. And this is, I think Headlines does illustrate why Drake is successful. This song was the second single. It was released on Drake's blog. A lot of these were released on the blog. Really? Really? I don't know. Yeah. Can you imagine, like, in the day, like, Dr. Drake being like, hey, guys, I got this new song. By the way, it's going to be out on my blog. Like, Dr. Drake didn't have a blog. He wasn't blogging.

[59:00]What are we talking about? DrDrake.blogspot.com. Do you think, like, did Drake make his own blog? Like, was he sitting with, like, his computer, his laptop in his living room one night? He's like, I'm going to make my own blog. He's, like, pressing Alt-U on WordPress and being like, how do I get into the source code of this shit? I don't like the fonts on here. Like, this banner doesn't have the right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm calling Angel Fire's helpline. Hello? Right. I can't get my text to be blinky enough. How do I get it to be more blinky? Headlines. Guys, you guys know I've been getting a lot of, remember when I got all those compliments from the person who reviewed the podcast for Rob? Oh, no. Well, I've gotten strung out on compliments. Oh, no. Overdosed on confidence. Overdosed. I've started not to give a fuck and stopped fearing the consequences. Drinking every night because tonight we drink to my accomplishments. And so beyond the Mountain Dew hard. Oh, no. Oh, you have multiple drinks today? Multiple drinks. And I'm drinking in honor of Drake. Drake supposedly is always seen carrying a white wine glass. He's always drinking Santa Margarita Pinot Grigio.

[60:02]And a lot of times he drinks a white wine spritzer. So I'm drinking a white wine spritzer tonight. Oh, nice. Nice. Nice. We got wine. We got Pinot Grigio, club soda, and a lemon. It looks nice. It looks real nice. If you saw the Venn diagram of people who are both drinking a white wine spritzer and Mountain Dew hard tonight, it would just be Russell. This guy. Recommended by zero out of zero doctors. Yes, I'll have a white wine spritzer. Oh, you know what? Could you also get me a hard Mountain Dew, please? Thank you. Zero carbs. Oh, I did like this. I did like headlines, though. I thought it was kind of fun. And he also includes the phrase in there, trying to catch a body. Well, that's the thing about Drake. That's the thing about Drake. And I think headlines is my favorite track on here. But I don't know. I don't know enough about his background to know, was he street? Did he grow up in a certain way? And hip hop is one of the only.

[61:01]Johnny Cash didn't shoot a man in Reno to watch him die. And no one cares. But in hip hop, it's always like, did you really do these things? And authenticity is a different thing. But Drake has this. He does have an ability to make songs for everyone. And so when Drake talks about catching a body, you believe him. But when he talks about being heartbroken over a breakup, you also believe him. And he's got a way. He's got a way to give of this kind of chameleonic approach. Some would say Drizzy's got the money, Aaron. Drizzy's got the money. He knows how to make the money. It's smart. Drizzy is a nickname. Got to admit, it's smart. It rhymes with so much stuff. If I picked a nickname, it would be like Dr. Orange. And I'd be like, Dr. Orange is on the scene. He can't think of anything that rhymes with Dr. Orange. This is a terrible decision. I think this next song would be what happened if there was a fuck fest on a boat. What would it be called? It would be called Crew Love. Crew Love. I was going to say this was like when. I was rowing in college. Here's The Weeknd, right? Yeah. Weeknd's got a great voice.

[62:01]Now, a lot of this album is about people doing lean. Guys, should we be doing lean? No. Why? It should fucking kill you. I mean, but I mean, I'd like to try it. Yeah, exactly. That's what I'm saying. Let's do one episode where we try lean. What is lean? It's fucking cough syrup with coney, dude. Yeah, that sounds like it's awesome. I read that this was originally a Weeknd solo. And then at the end, Drake was like, well, I'm going to add my own verse to it. That's kind of a. What do you think? I want you to do a song on my album, and then I'm going to drop something on the end of it. It doesn't surprise me at all. Guys, I heard that this was a Weeknd solo bit. And at the end, Drake put a verse just for himself to get some credit. So kind of an interesting idea. Maybe something that could work for the podcast. Something to think about, actually. Yeah, I think we should be like, I think like we, they were talking about weed. Rap guys were talking about weed for a long time. And it turns out, it gets really popular. What if that's true for lean, too? It was popular. It's killed people.

[63:00]We're going to talk. Oh, God, I didn't know it killed people. Half this album is dedicated to Lil Wayne. We're talking about Pimp C later. R.I.P. Pimp C. Lean killed him. You can die from lean? I didn't know you could die from lean. Stop your fucking breathing. Yes. We don't need to get into this. Aaron, I don't care what you say. We're not doing lean. Okay. Forget about Aaron. We're not doing lean. Take care. This is a Rihanna song. This reminds you. This reminds you how good Rihanna is, doesn't it? Yeah, if Rihanna's on a song, it's going to be a good song. I don't know a ton of Rihanna's music, but I thought this was great. I like the Nicki Minaj song later. I liked when he had the female singers or rappers on during the album. Yeah. And when the beat really drops, we're going to get into it. And actually, I was reminded of it when you were playing, Rob, the James Brown. Because this whole thing is about tuples. It's just like, here comes the bass. What? This is a tuple? Everything is in like twos. It's a two-syllable song,

[64:01]Take Care. And then the whole beat is about It can all be divided into twos. I feel like a lot of the rhyme scheme can be divided that way, too. Aaron, stand up for the drum. I love this beat. I love this beat. I got to say, I do like the way this album sounds. He says, I care about you. You hear these tuples. I like it. Listen, Marvin's room had no joke. I think you've got to be in the right mood, right? You've got to get your ass dumped in that. You've got to be high for this, too. You've got to be dumped and high. It helps. He gets drunk and calls an old flame to say he's lonely. I was curious. Did you guys ever do that in your life? Did you ever call an old flame like something wasn't going well and you called back to someone you were dating before? Are you serious? When I broke up with my longtime girlfriend in college, every female I knew from high school was like, what's going on? I was like, I was like, I was like Rain Man doing math.

[65:00]It's like, okay, lacrosse is an hour and a half drive. I was like the horny guy driving to different states. Like that was me. If any of those women would have been available, I'd have been like, okay, I'll drive. You want me to drive over? Like just on the off chance, like Aaron's trip down to Kansas City or whatever. That was not my trip to Jefferson City. That was my friend's trip. I went along. Let me be clear. Dude, this is a good idea. This is such a good idea. That's such a good idea. All right, let's turn around. Didn't work out, my bad. My thing was I like, I was mad about not making the choir. That's the kind of shit I wouldn't be getting mad about. But like, I mean, that's more or less pathetic. Sorry, Russell, go for it. No, I think it's great. I was going to say, did it ever go the other way where someone, you broke up with someone or they broke up with you and then they reached back out to you, Rob? Did it ever where they reached back out to you where they got lonely and were seeking you out as the old flame? That time where my ex showed up at a football game with a burrito. That's pretty solid. Well documented on this podcast. I was like, oh man, this actually rules. One thing I noted on that song is there's a piano player named Chili Gonzalez. I don't know if you guys have ever heard of him before. No, but it was one of the few times where there was a piano

[66:01]player was credited on the, on the song, but Chili Gonzalez actually broke the world record for the longest piano solo ever. What? In 2009, he played. Wait, wait, wait, Russell, can I, so are you telling me that Chili Gonzalez is, has the record for being like the longest pianist? The longest pianist ever. Wow. It's Chili Gonzalez. My, what's my, what's the plaque I have? And, what's the plaque I have in my house for them? I mean, this doesn't make any sense at all. His pianist goes for 27 hours, three minutes and 44 seconds, 300 songs. Rob, I played it. I give you a clip of it. You guys got to check this out. So this was in the 27th hour where he's busted out the glissandos at the very end of 27 hours, 27 hours. But the interesting thing about this guy, his real name is Jason Shirell's Beck Canadian music songwriter pianist. So when it comes to being the longest pianist ever, who did it better? I can't imagine a better Beck did it better than that.

[67:02]Can you imagine being in that crowd and being like, God damn, I love piano solos, but this one's only 27 hours. Like this sucks. Boo. Only 27 hours. What am I going to do for the next day? That's so long. Like, what would you, you'd have to start with like chopsticks, right? Do, do, do, do, do, do. Everybody be like, I hope this isn't the 27 hours. I hope this is. That's not at all how chopsticks goes, but okay. I picture Aaron in the music library being like chopsticks. Very interesting. That's my chopsticks. Do, do, do, do, do, do. No, that's not. It's late. Underground Kings. So this is a song about Pimp C from Underground Kings. Kind of a tribute to him. Guys from Lean, Rob. Don't do Lean kids. Okay, guys, I got to go update my blog. I didn't know. This is the one song I looked up the lyrics on Genius and I, cause he's, he's like,

[68:00]so much of this album. Drake is shouting out the South. He's shouting out New Orleans and Memphis. And I thought it was just like, you know, Drake has this ability to understand hip hop and understand the regionalism and know you got to appeal to different groups. But in his case, his dad was from Memphis. I didn't know this. His dad was a Memphis musician. So that's what he's talking about. He's a bass player for Prince, right? Yeah. I didn't know that. So he's talking about Yo Gotti, Memphis, and obviously like he was talking about Underground Kings. He's got to be talking about UGK. And this is my favorite Drake. Like, Drake is a huge rap fan. Like you can tell he loves rap. He's listened to a lot of rap and I like listening to him rap. Like Russell was saying, the singing, I'm not sure if I'm, I'm all in on, but I like hearing him rap. And I like that. He is open about his influences. So if he's a huge rap fan, he must love like big pun, fat Joe. I'm a huge rap fan. He's got a little big, but I mean, everyone should love big pun and fat Joe. Those guys can rap. Uh, uh, do you think part of why people don't like Drake is that is Canadian, right? Like, like they were talking about how this was really one of the

[69:02]first, like real true non USA guys to break into hip hop with the exception of possibly slick Rick, who it turns out is British. Did you know that it's sir? Slick Rick. Yes. There's one more. Matt knows. Matty Doughty. Matt. Matty Doughty and rapper. Matt can tell us party in former. Yes. Yes. Yep. I believe his name is snow. Oh, snow. Yes. Snow. By snow. Yeah. That's it. And to that, all I have to say is leaky boom, boom, down leaky boom, doing down. Aaron just stepped on my joke. Motherfucker. Also, I want to make sure. Did you listen to the joke I made earlier about slick Rick being British? That's not a joke. That's a true story. Uh, Lodi Dodi, Lodi Dodi. I love to tea. Pouty. What? I like to eat crumpets. Have you ever heard that song? It doesn't say Lodi Dodi. Yeah, it does. Lodi Dodi. We love to tea potty. Those are very different. We don't bother nobody.

[70:01]I've heard that song. A million times. Give me a, give me a break. Uh, we'll be fine. Featuring Birdman. Birdman. It's like Batman. Yeah. Lewis Birdman. Or Aquaman. This, this was one of the bigger hits, right? I think this was one of the ones I'd heard before. I could be wrong. I don't know. I don't know any of the hits on these, man. I have no idea. I, this is, this is a tough one. I know his headlines really. And now. You got a song and then the, the motto. This, this is why Drake makes me laugh. It's, he's like, listen, Nicki Minaj, you're a good friend of mine. Time to tell everybody I've got a huge crush on you with this song. And it's like, this is such like a middle school thing to do of like, I'm going to write her a note and put it in her locker. And then we're going to date and we're going to be married forever. But with Nicki Minaj, I'd take that chance. I've never listened to a whole Nicki Minaj album, but what would you rather listen to this Drake album or eight songs from Nicki Minaj? Oh, not even close. Listen to this. Eight songs from Nicki Minaj. That's what I would do. I'd take the Nicki Minaj album.

[71:01]Matt, she can rap her ass off. Oh, for sure. Yeah. It's, it's, I don't know. Lord knows featuring the boss, Russell, Rick Ross. I do anything with a choir. I'm in on this. So this is just blaze. Just blaze. Producing this. This sounds to me so much like Kanye. It's crazy. It's the best song on the album. I think, I think clearer in a way that I love the choir. I like the Rick Ross. I like the, like the quick little jabs. This is the best song there is on this one. Yeah. I mean, just blaze was producing stuff on Rockefeller as Kanye was coming up. So that's a good one, Rob. I mean, I'm sure just influence Kanye. Totally. And that stuff sounds like an event. Like when that beat drops, you're like, this is a thing that's happening. I got to hear this. We've talked about this. We need more choirs in songs. It's so good. Yes. You can't always get what you want is a song that has acquired it. Now here's the thing. Gangsters paradise is you said Rockefeller referring to Jay Z's album. And it doesn't make me think to the point where,

[72:01]I can't go on without saying it. Anything about the hit band, Rockefeller where in the world is carbon San Diego hit at Rockefeller. I Rockefeller to me was the height of music. When I was like in seventh grade, I was like, God damn, if I could live, if I could buy a Rockefeller album, I would just hear the guy be like, I'm at San Diego. He had the deepest voice in San Diego. And ironically, it came out later. He had the smallest penis in the group. A lot of people don't realize that the guy with the lowest voice had the smallest penis, much to everyone's shock. That's, that's why you like them. I think if you took the four members of Rockefeller and put them by penis size, you would never think that the lowest guy has a small, but it's true. Inverted. It would be, you would think you would have the biggest by far, but it says like, listen, I have a micro penis. I'm so sorry. I mean, that's just weird to hear, right? Yeah. A little bit. And by the way, you don't have to apologize for micro penises to see that. I mean, Matt, have you and your wife seen the micro penis episode of new girl with JJ Watt? That's a good one.

[73:00]That's a good one. Cameras. Good one goes. Good ones go. This was about trying to convince your girlfriend that you're not cheating. When a picture of you with another woman shows up in a magazine, what would, what if you showed up in a magazine picture with another woman? What would, what would your wife say guys? The idea that you think my wife would notice a magazine that I'm in is such a joke to me. She was mad. She was mad at me tonight. Cause I was going to bed and then waking up to do this podcast. And she's like, this fucking podcast better not wake me up too. She doesn't give a shit what I do at any time. I could be in a magazine with my micro penis out with Rockefeller. And she would be like, who's doing these dishes. You lazy fuck. Somebody's got to do the dishes. She, she, the other day at work, she texted me. She's like, I've been doing housework all day. I'm so mad, but I get home. The house was not that clean. I was like, what exactly are we doing here? You can't both complain to me about doing too much housework and not have

[74:01]the house absolutely spotless. What is going on? Not good thing. She doesn't listen to this podcast. I can say stuff like this. You might be doing it wrong. Doing it wrong. I got to say, I clap myself on the back. Cause when I heard this harmonica, I was like, God damn, that sounds a lot like Stevie wonder. And it turns out it is Stevie. One is right. Absolutely. Wow. It's beautiful. Except for the rest of the song. It's kind of a drag, isn't it? Oh, I don't love it. Yeah. But if you get a co-sign from Stevie, I mean, yeah. Hey, here's an 85. Here's like an 80 year old guy who wants to come play harmonica on my album. Like he's old, right? Crazy. We looked this up the other day. Stevie wonder, not that old. He's like 74. I think he's because he's been, he was 12 when his first hits showed up. Like he's been around our entire lives. He's not actually that old. Do you think John Popper's out in the waiting room with like his best of

[75:01]harmonicas and he sees Stevie wonder go in and he's like, fuck shit. I'm not getting this one. God damn. All right. Put all these harmonicas. Put all these harmonicas back. And then when he walks, he goes, we, he, her, he, her. I'm thinking of the best of harmonica. Sounds like an accordion when he's walking around. Have you ever thought about that? An accordion player having sex and go, it makes that noise at the same time. We're her, her, her. I know. Hello. Ever thought about it? Hello. The real, it's all I can think about. The real her. Which one's this one? Real her. Yes. With Lil Wayne. This got this Andre 3000 on this one, right? This is his text. That was, that was badass. I thought. Anytime he shows up, you got to listen. This is him singing about one of my favorite things with men. I cannot get enough of it. When guys think strippers love them. I just, every time you go with a group to a strip club,

[76:02]there's always a guy who's like, I think she really liked me. And I'm like, Oh God. Oh, this fills me with so much joy. I just can't get enough of it. Is this something you do often? I didn't know. Every time, every Wednesday when I'm at the strip club, during my lunch, I see a guy. Listen, I would love it. Well, I, you know, there was a, I, when I worked in, uh, Gilbert, Minnesota, it's a town of 800 people. One of the smallest places I've ever worked. They had 800 people. They had like eight bars and one strip club in town. Oh no. And it was a strip club that on average, I think had three people in it. So if you went in the one time I peeked in, there was a dancer at the end eating. Hey, just the one time, only one time. He just like the only one time. He just, open up the door and just to check it out. Just, I taught in the town. So I never could go in the strip club, but she was eating out of a styrofoam box of leftovers, like wings. And then like, if somebody came in, she would like get up and dance. And I was like, well, this, this seems like a honey barbecue sauce all over.

[77:02]Like Rob's, Rob's filling an application. Like, wait, did you do is the strip club had the greatest strip club name I've ever heard in my entire life. What was it? The gladiator. What? Rob's sitting there with a plate of wings and said, are you not entertained? It was a strip club. I mean, you got to admit, would you go into a strip club called the gladiator and you see naked women? You'd be like, Oh, well, this is not what I was expecting at all. I will have my vengeance in this life or the next. It's like, Oh yeah. The gladiator, a very erotic name for a strip club. Oh yeah. I'm going to lease a live tiger into the strip club and it's running around like chasing people away from sniffers row or whatever. You just see, you just see Russ in the crowd with, the thumb is down by live animals. Look what you've done. I'm in your basement and I'm in love with Nebby and I still love it, but it fell through because I wasn't ready.

[78:02]Hell yeah. Fucking right. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Fucking right. And we say, hell yeah. Is this little Wayne? Yes. Wayne. I don't know anything about little Wayne other than like he gets in fights with people at grocery stores, right? Like, is he a respected rapper or what? What's where? Yes. They're, they lie in like the Pantheon can't be fighting the grocery store. It's a place of Chile, New Orleans rapper. He's a New Orleans rapper. He's been rapping since he was 12 or 14. And he had a stretch in the early two thousands where he was when he, when he did dedication to, and the drought three, I mean, the dude would just rap for days and days and days. He's another one who would just get strung out off lean and just rap. But he definitely had a stretch in the early two thousands where he had a claim to the greatest rapper alive thrown, but he's, he's part of the young money cash. Money group that Drake was a part of. Go ahead, man. He's got, he's got two albums on the list. Two or eight is the Carter three Carter three. And then at three 70 is the Carter two.

[79:01]Yeah. Yeah. So this list makes no sense. He's just a dude who would wrap his ass off and, and rappers love him because he made, I mean, he just made song after song and just like mixtape after mixtape, just never stopped stream of consciousness kind of stuff. Uh, next up, Russell, just like, uh, Allen Iverson, we're talking about practice, right? Practice. Here he is. He's back in new Orleans. He's back. Love in New Orleans. How good that fucking juvenile song is. Yeah. I mean, back, this makes me want to listen to back that ass up for sure. Another song about a stripper. He's got a lot of songs about strippers too. It would seem that he might spend some time in the strip club. I don't know. Were you guys ever a fan of the strip club? I haven't been to a strip club since I was like 25. Probably. I'm sure the last time I was there was with someone else from this podcast. I wouldn't say who I, I just, I just, I, I always went and like, it just kind of stressed me out. And it was like, Oh, it's expensive. And like, and then at the same time, it's like, Oh, I don't feel great about being here.

[80:01]I mean, I work in the town. This place is called the gladiator. And I volunteered to come here during amateur night. Like, no, this makes any sense. Not a fan. What if Matt was like, guys, I fucking love strip clubs. I go once a week. They are the greatest. I love it. I was there today for lunch. You go into the Seville club and Matt's got like a gold plate on one end of like the, where it says Matt sits here. Like it's his spot. He's got his little cabinet with the drinks in there with his name tag on it. Mike Tice at that bar in St. Louis park or whatever. Bunnies. Bunnies. The ride. You won't feel me till everybody say they love you, but it's not. I thought this album ended pretty strong. I thought there's some good stuff here at the end. Yeah. I think a lot of the skips are in the middle. Yeah. But he gets into kind of the soul. Soul samples here. Go ahead, Russell. That makes it hard to get through though. Right. When you live, did you guys get through this on one listen ever or not?

[81:00]No, God, no, no, no, no. It's too long. It's an hour and a half. What are you doing, Drake? Like, let's just, let's just maybe like put a good song. That's the other problem too, right? Is when you know it, when you're not limited by your vinyl length, you can just be like, fuck it. We're going to release everything. And guess what? If you're on iTunes, you get an extra one. If you subscribe to the blog, you get an extra one. Like it's just, it's too much. Here is a song, which Matt declares the greatest song on the album. The fourth single, the motto. I mean, like this song is credited with making the phrase YOLO so popular, which as a middle school teacher, I heard for the next 10 years, approximately 1 million times, but I got to give it up for the phrase YOLO. It's great. Cause for a long time, you could do whatever you want. Somebody that's dumb as shit. You could be like, I'm going to go naked in this Chipotle and just be like YOLO. And everybody'd be like, guys, he's YOLOing. He could do what he wants. He's going naked. He's going naked in the Chipotle. And they're going to ask him for extra guac. Now that joke doesn't make sense.

[82:03]Unlike my wife hates sleeping alone. How many, how many more songs are there? I thought we were done like three songs ago. This is an iTunes bonus track. We don't, we don't do bonus tracks. Right. You guys didn't use. So is the motto, but you had to do the model. That's the, that's right. Popular one. You didn't let me do Saturn for songs in the key of life. So we can't do hate sleeping alone for this one. Oh, what was the one on the key of life? It was like Uranus, right? Is that what it's called? Oh, going back to Saturn where the people smile. Saturn is a way better bonus track than hate sleeping alone. All right, guys, that was the album. Let's get into the very popular and patented rating system. This album is at 95. Take care. By Drake. Gotta say, this is one reason I love doing this podcast. I've never listened to Drake. And now I have. Okay. And I can say that if somebody says, Oh, have you ever listened to Drake? Which is a conversation nobody's ever going to have with me. I could say, yeah. And guess what? It's number 95 on the list.

[83:01]And sir, excuse me, sir, sir, sir, would you say that album belongs at number five? If so, that's a rolling well-toned. It's perfect. Rolling stone did their job. Oh my God, this list they put together. They put so much time into it. So much thought. It's great. It's a rolling well-toned. Is it a rolling grown? You don't like it. It shouldn't be up at 95. Maybe it could be lower on the list. 96, 97. And I know what you're thinking lower. That's a higher number. But in this sense, it's kind of like a teeter-totter. When you go farther, it goes down. We're talking negative correlation with that. That's a rolling grown. If it should be higher on the list, a higher number, but somehow also lower at the same time. If you think about it, or is this a rolling bone? Okay. This should have been higher than 95. And in this case, higher, if you're going up the teeter-totter, you would think, Oh, that's a higher number. No, that's, that's actually down. So that would be a rolling bone. It should have been at 94, 93, 92, 88. Any of those numbers. What do we think? Russell rolling,

[84:00]well-toned rolling bone or rolling grown with Drake. Take care. 95. I like some of the rap songs. I like some of the music. Some of it got a little, I don't know if you'd call it techno or whatever, but I know we've talked about the drum machine. It got a little repetitive for me. I didn't like a lot of the slow song. So I'm going to say a slight rolling grown. I think it's too high on the list. I don't think, I'll come back and listen to it that often. Matt, what do you think? Rolling? Well-toned rolling bone or rolling grown. And this is a big mystery. Nobody knows what Matt's going to say. Who knows? It could be anything. I'm going to agree with Russell and say, this album is way too highly rated. It's rolling. I don't even say that. No, but I'm with us. I think it's either listening to it with you guys here tonight. This first time I listened to it in a couple months, I guess it's not bad, right? I mean, there's a whole bunch of stuff. I just think it jumps all over. The place that I'm probably being nitpicky, but you know, at one point he's trying to find a girlfriend in the strip club and then he's talking to Jesus and then he's trying not to cheat on his girlfriend.

[85:01]And I mean, I don't know. It's just the best songs are a little way, little Wayne and Rihanna songs. Yeah. Not even like his songs, you know, things like that. So it's just feels like it's all over the place. It feels like a bunch of one or not singles that are kind of just placed together and they've all got a purpose. That's more for making money, by selling on blogs than just like the art. I don't know. I probably nitpicking when I get to it, but I just don't get it. So I'm just going to say rolling. I think it'd be tough growing up. Like if you were in your teens, if you were 18, right. And this is the music that was big in your life. It would be kind of a bummer. Cause it's a kind of a sad song, right? I mean, it's, it's like we used to have Bob Hope, Johnny Cash and Chumba Wumba. And now we've got no hope, no cash and a whiskey drink. No cider drinks. That's no cider. Not even a cider drink. No. And I will have a lager drink, which I, I'm not even sure what that beans actually, but it sounds delicious. I mean, I guess if you put a lime in there, it's nice.

[86:00]Aaron, what do you think? Rolling well-toned rolling bone or rolling grown? Yeah. I also had never listened to this album. I think that when Drake is really rapping, I enjoy that. I like what a fan of rap music he is, but Russell mentioned techno music. And I think, I think a lot of this music to me, I've not been in a club for maybe in my life. But a lot of this seems like not for me. I'm with you. That's probably the best way to say it. It's just not for me. A lot of this music seems like club music or dance music. And I'm, I'm going to do the thing I always do, which is think about another artist, which is if we're talking about dance music, where the fuck is Madonna? How the fuck do we have Drake on this list before we have Madonna? So I cannot, like if we're talking about dance floors, nobody can rock a dance floor like Madonna from 80 through 95. There's got to be a Madonna album in here somewhere that's better than this. I'm giving this a rolling groan. And if you want to hear us talk more about albums that we, or artists that we haven't covered yet, it should be on the list.

[87:00]I want you to listen to next week's voicemail. Okay. So again, this is one of those times where just go to next week, listen to that voicemail. You're going to get a lot of replacements. I think you're right. I think, I think, why haven't we had Madonna yet? That is crazy. Right? 138. 138. Wow. That's so far back. She's got three albums on the list, but it's coming up at 138. The Immaculate Collection. Which is a greatest hit. So it's a cheater album anyways. Ooh, Mac. It's a good one. Dress you up in my love though. It's a great one. It's a banger. It's a great album. We used to have, that used to be a real makeout album for my wife and I. Hey. Well, for mostly me. And a pillow with a drawing that I made of my wife. And that was before we were dating. It was weird. Did you give a rating, Rosie? Did you say what it was? I said rolling, rolling groan. This is too. Listen. What do you think, Rob? This is a, unfortunately you guys are wrong. This is a, this is a rolling 2000 in tones. 2010. It seemed good. Like a rolling, like a rolling well,

[88:00]2000 in tone. Listen, you are going to have strong opinions about Drake, no matter what. But the bottom line is this influenced music for all of the 2010s. You can hear this all throughout. Anytime you're picking up rapper hip hop. Now you hear the same noise. You hear the same singing slash rapping. Like Drake is a juggernaut. Whether you think he's the real deal or not, he is the man of the 2010s. He's an absolute, I mean, just unbelievable. The biggest artist in the streaming era ever. So you got to get up for that. Even if his, you know, even if maybe his voice causes you want to think it was like just to have an angst 200 plus songs. If it, the billboard charts or something like that, that's crazy. He's number one. When he releases an album, every song on that album hits the charts. Like it's like, so that blogger million downloads, a lot of blog hits a day. Yeah. Guys, do we need a Beck did a better blog to blog? Yeah. Yeah. A little behind the scenes during the week. Like here's what the prep looks like. Aaron's Aaron's foot corner.

[89:00]It's like, Oh my God, this foot corner has 10,000 clicks a day. Let me look at the IP address. Let me see. It just says Aaron's IP address. Well, that's a weird that he would call it that. That doesn't make any sense at all. Listen guys, next up, we've got an album that remind us. Oh no. Oh God. I forgot. I'd written this down. This, this is an album. That remind us according to DeBruy, DeBruy Lee, never said that name out loud. All matter is made up of waves. That's true. That's true. DeBruy Lee said that all matters made up of waves. Matters way about made up of waves. Yeah. That's why everybody hurts. REM. Oh man. It's REM next. Wow. That's automatic. Better when you want. Oh yeah. Automatic for the people. Sorry. What's the frequency though? But you're just too lazy to look. That song makes me want to eat the shit out of Dan. Rather. I'll tell you that right now. Hey, Dan, rather get a taste of your nooks. We haven't had a taste of your nooks for a while, bro.

[90:01]I bet it is satisfying to beat the shit out of Dan rather though. Rob, did you tell any jokes on this podcast? Sorry. I didn't have my hearing aid in during the whole episode. I'll have to put it back in in case you make a funny next week. So there's a, a, a small potato and the potato, the potato has this kid. And they go to this, this city, right? Yeah. And the potato comes back and it, and it's gone to college in New York city. And it's like, Oh my gosh, this is the great. And now, you know, all these people and the potato gets a job on wall street. The potato kid gets a job at wall street in New York city. Yeah. And as they're working, they're climbing the ranks are going up and up in the company. And the parents, you know, they're just telling all their friends like, yeah, they're working at this investment firm and this potatoes get a better, better job. I just can't believe it. And then the potato turns out to be vice president of the company. Unheard of for potato to be vice president. Of the company. And this potato kid comes back and tell their parents, you know what? Things have changed. I've,

[91:00]I've met the love of my life and it's Dan rather. And I can't believe it. And the parents go, Oh my God, sweetie. He's just a commentator. Aaron, put your, put your, your, your piece in. Not doing it. Not laughing at that. No, sir. Not doing it. Not laughing at that. Sorry. Hold on. What was that? Are we still recording? Commentator. Somebody checking their iPad. Somebody checking their podcast app. Oh, the Drake episode is two hours long. Wow. Get back. They're going to talk about Drake a lot. Can't wait to listen to this. Turns out they're doing Dan rather jokes. They actually look at the after editing. It's a half hour long. Oh, this one didn't go so well.