Joni Mitchell: Court and Spark (1973)

[00:00]all right here we go hey energy up rob yeah just because everybody else in your house is sleeping

[00:07]and you're probably been sleeping for like three hours too just oh no way longer three hours you

[00:13]kidding jane went to bed at like eight just to let you know when i went in and i had to get the

[00:17]toothbrush for the last episode for that bit i had to like sneak in like indiana jones with the gold

[00:23]statue i was like moving so slow and like not closing the doors all the ways they don't click

[00:29]and then like closing the door so the light doesn't spill out it was a total nightmare you're

[00:32]not drinking rhubarb blueberry are you oh my no no i wish i were but no that's just regular old

[00:38]red wine i almost played strawberry wine again couldn't help myself oh god what a song in 2020

[00:46]four friends decide to listen to every one of let me start over in 2020 four friends decide to listen

[00:53]to every one of the greatest 500 albums is decided by rolling stone magazine this resulted in a text

[00:58]that's every music excoriated the order and led us to making this podcast we are far from experts

[01:03]we promise to do almost no research all opinions are our own unless you disagree please sit back

[01:09]and enjoy beck did it better guys we're just like aaron driving down the road we're all the way up

[01:15]to 110 and from 1974 there's no way it's ever driven 110 no never been 110 i think i hit 100

[01:24]once i think no no you're on the 110

[01:28]we'd rather talk about speeds isn't there a highway called 110 and isn't it just a one

[01:32]there's the one there's the 101 there's no way that red dodge neon you used to have here

[01:39]you're thinking of my nissan center i definitely hit 90 in that nissan center

[01:45]from 1974 it's court and spark by joni mitchell

[01:55]guys you know there's nothing to say there's not we're not tired okay we're definitely fresh

[01:59]haven't seen you guys for a week let's just hey we're driving down we're diving down the one

[02:03]one the 110 okay the very famous highway the 110 we're driving down let's just turn on the radio

[02:09]real quick and see what's on this is a k-rob with a message from aaron's neighbors please

[02:15]don't bring over any more figs we don't like them help me the figs are falling in my yard again

[02:23]it's true

[02:24]when i bought this house i thought there would just be some now and then

[02:29]yes i'm in trouble i made a can of some jam and i did it all again

[02:34]i baked a pie in the oven

[02:40]like figs please take some the figs have uh figs have overtaken my life i cannot pick

[02:48]up figs fast enough to get rid of the goddamn figs

[02:51]way too

[02:54]as many people as we can my lady already made like three jars of fig jam and then i picked

[02:59]enough things to make three more jars of fig jam the pigs are completely overrunning our lives

[03:03]it's terrible i don't know what i'm gonna do for the next month help me the figs are falling

[03:08]way too fast i made a fig preserve but since then even more have amassed the neighbors run

[03:18]when they see me because they are constantly being harassed

[03:23]we have a fig preserve but since then even more have amassed the neighbors run when they see me because they are constantly being harassed

[03:23]we have a fig preserve but since then even more have amassed the neighbors run when they see me because they are constantly being harassed

[03:23]we have a fig preserve but since then even more have amassed the neighbors run when they see me because they are constantly being harassed

[03:23]we have a fig preserve but since then even more have amassed the neighbors run when they see me because they are constantly being harassed

[03:23]we have a fig preserve but since then even more have amassed the neighbors run when they see me because they are constantly being harassed

[03:23]we have a fig preserve but since then even more have amassed the neighbors run when they see me because they are constantly being harassed we have a fig loaf in the oven

[03:29]yes don't run without taking some

[03:37]there's a joke here right

[03:53]there's a joke here right

[03:53]there's a joke here right at the end too i've got the perfect

[03:55]at the end too i've got the perfect

[03:55]at the end too i've got the perfect podcast for you jack

[03:58]podcast for you jack

[03:58]podcast for you jack beck did it better

[04:01]beck did it better

[04:01]beck did it better oh never mind i thought i said fix at the

[04:03]oh never mind i thought i said fix at the

[04:03]oh never mind i thought i said fix at the end oops

[04:04]end oops

[04:04]end oops uh here's the deal you didn't know i

[04:07]uh here's the deal you didn't know i

[04:07]uh here's the deal you didn't know i forgot about that part

[04:09]forgot about that part

[04:09]forgot about that part it's a good joke in my head listen we

[04:11]it's a good joke in my head listen we

[04:11]it's a good joke in my head listen we are here talking about the best albums

[04:13]are here talking about the best albums

[04:13]are here talking about the best albums ever as according to rolling stone

[04:14]ever as according to rolling stone

[04:14]ever as according to rolling stone magazine

[04:15]magazine

[04:15]magazine i've got three guys here who'd like the

[04:17]i've got three guys here who'd like the

[04:17]i've got three guys here who'd like the last song on this album the best

[04:19]last song on this album the best

[04:19]last song on this album the best so strange that's so weird i've got

[04:22]so strange that's so weird i've got

[04:22]so strange that's so weird i've got russell in minnesota russell how are

[04:24]russell in minnesota russell how are

[04:24]russell in minnesota russell how are you doing

[04:24]you doing

[04:24]you doing guys i was a free man in paris i felt

[04:26]guys i was a free man in paris i felt

[04:26]guys i was a free man in paris i felt unfettered and alive

[04:43]i was a free man in paris i felt unfettered and alive and i've got aaron and aaron i

[04:45]and i've got aaron and aaron i

[04:45]and i've got aaron and aaron i i want to tell you you know you're you

[04:47]i want to tell you you know you're you

[04:47]i want to tell you you know you're you really are a great friend to me and i

[04:49]really are a great friend to me and i

[04:49]really are a great friend to me and i want to tell you something earnestly

[04:51]want to tell you something earnestly

[04:51]want to tell you something earnestly uh do you know what i mean verne

[04:54]uh do you know what i mean verne

[04:54]uh do you know what i mean verne aaron in california

[04:58]earnestly verne you'll you'll not be

[05:00]earnestly verne you'll you'll not be

[05:00]earnestly verne you'll not be surprised to learn that i saw ernest goes

[05:02]surprised to learn that i saw ernest goes

[05:02]surprised to learn that i saw ernest goes to camp

[05:02]to camp

[05:02]to camp in the theater me too

[05:07]in the theater me too

[05:07]in the theater me too those turtles come down with their little

[05:08]those turtles come down with their little

[05:08]those turtles come down with their little parachutes you're like hell yeah

[05:10]parachutes you're like hell yeah

[05:10]parachutes you're like hell yeah great plan you have this i'm glad i know

[05:11]great plan you have this i'm glad i know

[05:11]great plan you have this i'm glad i know what i mean

[05:12]what i mean

[05:12]what i mean i'm glad my parents paid seven dollars

[05:14]i'm glad my parents paid seven dollars

[05:14]i'm glad my parents paid seven dollars for this ticket uh rob is that a pretty

[05:16]for this ticket uh rob is that a pretty

[05:16]for this ticket uh rob is that a pretty girl in your bathroom thinking about her

[05:17]girl in your bathroom thinking about her

[05:17]girl in your bathroom thinking about her sex appeal let's talk about joni mitchell

[05:20]sex appeal let's talk about joni mitchell

[05:20]sex appeal let's talk about joni mitchell whoa

[05:22]whoa

[05:22]whoa this is throwing me off now listen you

[05:23]this is throwing me off now listen you

[05:23]this is throwing me off now listen you guys if you guys could live in a world

[05:25]guys if you guys could live in a world

[05:25]guys if you guys could live in a world with only ernest goes to camp or only

[05:27]with only ernest goes to camp or only

[05:27]with only ernest goes to camp or only peewee's big adventure which world would

[05:28]peewee's big adventure which world would

[05:28]peewee's big adventure which world would you pick big adventure peewee over

[05:31]you pick big adventure peewee over

[05:31]you pick big adventure peewee over ernest yeah yeah yeah yeah peewee's a

[05:34]ernest yeah yeah yeah yeah peewee's a

[05:34]ernest yeah yeah yeah yeah peewee's a comic mastermind

[05:35]comic mastermind

[05:35]comic mastermind ernest was i don't even know what

[05:37]ernest was i don't even know what

[05:37]ernest was i don't even know what ernest

[05:38]ernest

[05:38]ernest he like wasn't everything we talked

[05:39]he like wasn't everything we talked

[05:39]he like wasn't everything we talked about we talked about the latest peewee

[05:42]about we talked about the latest peewee

[05:42]about we talked about the latest peewee movie that came out like 2016.

[05:43]movie that came out like 2016.

[05:43]movie that came out like 2016. no no and there's literally this scene

[05:45]no no and there's literally this scene

[05:45]no no and there's literally this scene and it turns out it's one of his bits

[06:01]Three and a half minutes to squeak out.

[06:03]Not now, Rob, at the end.

[06:04]Okay.

[06:04]Yeah.

[06:05]You can do all our talk here.

[06:07]Let's just do it now.

[06:08]Let's just do it.

[06:09]Oh, God.

[06:09]Hey, Zeke, what do you guys do for fun around here?

[06:12]I'll edit this.

[06:12]Oh, no.

[06:13]So Pee-wee is now.

[06:14]He was actually a judge on Top Chef in one of the recent years.

[06:17]Oh, wow, Russell.

[06:19]You can go to one of those restaurants.

[06:20]Oh, he's really working.

[06:22]I've told you this is one of my greatest fears, right?

[06:26]You'd be a good recorder player.

[06:27]Jesus.

[06:28]Yeah, the wind on this guy.

[06:30]My kids and I literally watched this ten times.

[06:32]Just couldn't stop laughing.

[06:34]If you blow up a balloon and it blows up and takes out one of your eyes,

[06:38]that would be the worst because you have an eye patch.

[06:41]Okay.

[06:42]He's got a huge balloon.

[06:53]Watch everybody in the background starts gathering.

[07:00]It's so late.

[07:01]Hold on.

[07:01]It's so bad.

[07:11]Oh, God.

[07:12]It's literally the funniest thing he's ever done.

[07:16]There's no way we're just going to pull this off.

[07:19]Hold on.

[07:21]Oh, my God.

[07:29]Oh, my God.

[07:29]This is a good bit.

[07:31]The balloon is still so big.

[07:33]Still going.

[07:41]What if this is what gets us taken down for copyright?

[07:49]Yeah, this is it, right?

[07:50]You just played an entire scene for the QE.

[07:52]How's he keeping all the air in the balloon?

[07:59]Hold on, just wait until they all collapse again.

[08:02]We're going to lose the last four listeners we have here.

[08:09]Hold on.

[08:12]The most mind-blowing part from this scene

[08:21]is that according to this YouTube clip,

[08:23]it is from a movie called Kiwi's Big Holiday.

[08:26]I have never, ever heard of that movie.

[08:28]It's on Netflix.

[08:29]It's on YouTube.

[08:29]It was from 2016.

[08:30]It's on Netflix.

[08:31]That's right.

[08:32]Kids, we got into the big adventures.

[08:34]We watched it.

[08:35]Adrian, Mr. Herman.

[08:36]Mr. Herman.

[08:37]We had a telephone call at the front desk.

[08:40]Yep.

[08:40]And then, so that one came on,

[08:42]and then literally it was like,

[08:43]oh, the thing's dragging,

[08:44]and then this scene comes on.

[08:45]It is the funniest Pee-wee three minutes

[08:48]in the history of Pee-wee Herman.

[08:50]This is so good.

[08:51]No, it's just a balloon.

[08:52]No, I got to say, the worst part of this is,

[08:54]this does step on.

[08:55]We have a brand new bit.

[08:57]Instead of a voicemail this week,

[08:58]I have a brand new bit.

[08:59]Now, I'm just going to tell you,

[09:00]if this bit is a bomb,

[09:01]we can cut it.

[09:02]It's not a big deal,

[09:03]so don't get mad.

[09:04]Russell sometimes gives me a mad look

[09:05]when I come up with new...

[09:07]Is he getting a cowboy hat on?

[09:08]Is he getting a mad look with a cowboy hat on?

[09:11]But I'm going to tell you right now,

[09:12]we've got a new segment on the show,

[09:14]and this segment of the show is called

[09:16]Video Breakdown.

[09:17]Video Breakdown.

[09:18]It is time.

[09:20]Five, four, three, two, one.

[09:24]For another better...

[09:25]Video Breakdown.

[09:27]Are we going to break down Pee-wee Herman?

[09:29]Pee-wee's big holiday Amish balloon video?

[09:31]Yeah.

[09:32]Because if we do this twice,

[09:33]it'll be awesome.

[09:34]No, unfortunately, we're not.

[09:37]We're doing something that...

[09:38]It would be pretty epic

[09:39]if we broke it down a second time.

[09:40]We can't do it, Russell.

[09:42]I get why it'd be funny.

[09:43]We can't do it.

[09:44]Rob hates funny podcasts.

[09:46]How about when he does it on Conan?

[09:50]Can we do it when he's doing it

[09:51]in front of Conan?

[09:51]Guys, here's the deal.

[09:54]You're going to thank me

[09:55]for rushing along with this.

[09:56]We are going to watch the video,

[09:58]and I've been thinking about this

[09:59]ever since Russell got his cowboy hat

[10:00]that he's wearing.

[10:01]We are going to break down the video

[10:03]Chattahoochee by Alan Jackson.

[10:05]We're going to let it play.

[10:05]Way down yonder, huh?

[10:06]And we are going to watch this video

[10:08]because ever since I saw

[10:09]Russell's white cowboy hat,

[10:10]it reminded me of the

[10:11]Alan Jackson Chattahoochee video,

[10:12]so I watched it.

[10:13]Way down yonder on the Chattahoochee

[10:15]Never knew what it meant to me

[10:18]And it turns out

[10:20]this is the most insane video of all time.

[10:22]There is a reason

[10:23]there has never been another star performer

[10:26]who for the entire video

[10:28]is wearing a life jacket.

[10:29]Can you think of another video

[10:31]where somebody is wearing a life jacket

[10:32]for most of it?

[10:33]Watch this video.

[10:34]Here we go.

[10:34]Life jacket doesn't seem like

[10:36]the coolest way to go, does it?

[10:37]At least it's not the big orange one.

[10:40]The orange life jackets are the worst, right?

[10:41]Like if you have to go on a boat

[10:42]and the only one they have left,

[10:43]Russell, is the orange life jacket.

[10:45]And I feel like we've talked about this

[10:47]on the show before.

[10:47]Chattahoochee.

[10:48]We're doing a video breakdown.

[10:49]Let's watch it.

[10:50]It's from 92, by the way.

[10:53]It's the water skiing video.

[10:55]He's water skiing with the white cowboy hat on.

[10:57]With Alan Jackson.

[10:59]He's got a pink life jacket.

[11:02]He's wearing the ripped jeans.

[11:03]And he's doing slalom style, too.

[11:06]He's one ski, he's slalom style.

[11:07]He's wearing jeans in the water.

[11:08]This is like jeans that are

[11:10]straight to fit right here.

[11:11]This is my shit right here.

[11:12]He's just trying to get it.

[11:13]I mean, he did wear some tight jeans.

[11:14]Whoa, that's pretty impressive.

[11:16]He's a good skier.

[11:16]He's literally a good skier.

[11:17]Now, here's the thing with Alan Jackson.

[11:20]You find out why he wears sunglasses so much.

[11:23]He has a very feminine...

[11:25]We're going to have to cut the audio on this.

[11:25]If we were going to get cut before,

[11:27]this will do it.

[11:29]He has a very feminine upper face.

[11:34]What?

[11:35]When he wears his sunglasses,

[11:36]he looks badass.

[11:36]He's got a mustache.

[11:37]When he's not wearing his sunglasses,

[11:39]look at his face

[11:40]when he's not wearing sunglasses.

[11:41]He looks like Alan Jackson's sister.

[11:43]What are you talking about?

[11:44]Look at those eyes, though.

[11:46]He's got a sideburns, a mullet, and a mustache.

[11:48]Also, that's not even an official cowboy's jersey.

[11:50]That's like one you'd make.

[11:50]No, it's not.

[11:51]It's a knockoff.

[11:52]That is Herschel Walker.

[11:54]He went to Georgia.

[11:55]So it makes sense.

[11:58]I mean, this video has...

[12:04]It's just him water skiing and wakeboarding now.

[12:07]In jeans.

[12:07]Oh, wow.

[12:08]In jeans.

[12:09]He flipped.

[12:10]We took a little wipe out there.

[12:11]This, guys, this video is insane.

[12:13]Rob, you drive people around on like the tube and stuff.

[12:16]Are you one who tries to whip them off

[12:18]or do you let them try to stay on?

[12:19]I, you know what,

[12:21]now that my kids are tubing,

[12:23]I'm the nicest tube rider ever.

[12:24]Like, compared to what my dad used to do to me

[12:27]when I'm doing it,

[12:27]I'm trying to be very, very...

[12:28]You gotta let that thing go slack

[12:30]and right when they think they're good,

[12:31]you hammer it down, right?

[12:33]His life jacket also is just really something like the...

[12:37]Oh, there's a little pup.

[12:38]Yeah, look at their life jacket

[12:41]with the sort of cosmic print on it.

[12:44]And how come...

[12:45]Why in the music video

[12:46]is it going from daylight to nighttime?

[12:48]It's daylight and then all of a sudden it's nighttime

[12:50]and now it's daylight again.

[12:51]There's a turtle across the street.

[12:53]Hey, the turtle...

[12:53]Do you know who would really do well in this video?

[12:56]Who's that?

[12:57]It's Jenny with her...

[12:58]Transition glasses.

[12:59]Oh, from Day to Night.

[13:00]She'd be perfect.

[13:01]Oh, my God.

[13:04]Maybe that's what Alan Jackson had on him.

[13:06]Why do you think he has such a feminine upper face?

[13:07]Now he's skipping rocks.

[13:09]Are you guys good at skipping rocks?

[13:11]Man, I could see you being a great rock skipper.

[13:13]Oh, yeah.

[13:14]You know, I was almost a sidearm pitcher.

[13:17]So, yeah, I can do pretty well.

[13:18]Oh, wow.

[13:19]Look at those cowboy boots.

[13:20]The red and white cowboy boots,

[13:22]those are one of a kind.

[13:23]Do you guys ever have cowboy boots?

[13:25]As a kid, yeah.

[13:27]I've always thought,

[13:28]are cowboy boots for people with fat feet?

[13:30]I feel like my feet are too fat for cowboy boots

[13:32]that they would just get squished.

[13:34]Yeah, if you ever have to have a concern

[13:36]that you won't be able to get them off by yourself,

[13:38]you probably shouldn't have them, right?

[13:40]That's true.

[13:40]That's a...

[13:41]Oh, my God.

[13:41]If he's going to have someone else take them off...

[13:44]He's not going to be tubing with a guitar.

[13:45]Alan Jackson is now tubing

[13:47]and playing a guitar at the same time.

[13:48]This video is un-fucking-believable.

[13:50]This is the most amazing thing.

[13:52]And then he's got a party

[13:52]where there's, like, some people playing fiddles

[13:54]and some people just dancing by fireworks.

[13:56]And there's people just shooting...

[13:57]Just shooting...

[13:58]Shooting off fireworks, right?

[13:59]Right next to people's faces.

[14:00]I'm way too cautious.

[14:02]I would be like,

[14:02]we need to be away from the fireworks here.

[14:04]Yeah.

[14:05]Now there's just random people

[14:06]making out in front of a car.

[14:07]Do you think Alan Jackson was like,

[14:10]listen, guys, I can water ski.

[14:12]We're going to put this into the video.

[14:13]Or do you think they said,

[14:14]hey, Alan Jackson, can you water ski?

[14:16]Because I have this idea for a video.

[14:17]Like, it's kind of the chicken or the egg.

[14:19]It's the Alan Jackson or the water ski.

[14:20]It's got to come from Alan Jackson first, right?

[14:22]No, it had to be him, right?

[14:23]Yeah, he had to be like,

[14:24]I got to show off my water ski skills.

[14:26]What happened to Alan Jackson?

[14:28]Why?

[14:28]Why isn't he...

[14:29]Nothing.

[14:30]He just got old.

[14:31]I think he's a member of the Grand Ole Opry.

[14:32]Never got out in 1992.

[14:33]I think he still performs at the Opry occasionally.

[14:36]When you're a member of the Opry,

[14:37]I believe you have to,

[14:39]you're required to perform there

[14:40]a certain number of times a year.

[14:43]And I think he's a member.

[14:43]I think he still performs at the Opry.

[14:45]All right.

[14:49]That's a nice little tag.

[14:50]And then the fisherman at the end

[14:54]pulls up his white hat.

[14:55]Russell, does that make you kind of sad

[14:56]seeing a fisherman pulling up

[14:58]the white cowboy hat,

[14:59]implying, I assume,

[15:00]that Alan Jackson is dead?

[15:01]What?

[15:03]Well, that's right.

[15:04]I mean, he's pulling the cowboy hat.

[15:05]Do you see what he's doing?

[15:06]The fisher person,

[15:07]he's pulling the cowboy hat out of the lake.

[15:09]I feel like my white cowboy hat

[15:11]has much more credibility

[15:13]now that I've watched this Chattahoochee video.

[15:15]Is that also why you've been wearing a life jacket

[15:17]for this whole record?

[15:18]So you're trying to really get in the...

[15:21]What's he talking about

[15:23]when he says it gets hotter than the hoochie-coochie?

[15:24]Oh, Aaron.

[15:26]What's he saying?

[15:27]What's that about?

[15:28]I don't know.

[15:29]Now, it's possible that I've watched this video so much

[15:32]that I did kind of a deep dive, maybe,

[15:34]on what that is,

[15:35]and I did some research on it.

[15:36]A hoochie-coochie was the sideshow

[15:38]at a circus where they had the women stripping.

[15:41]So that was the hoochie-coochie.

[15:43]That's like what a hoochie-coochie man is, right?

[15:46]Like the song.

[15:46]So it's hotter than that.

[15:49]And guys, think of this.

[15:50]It's a summer night.

[15:51]You take your family to the fair.

[15:54]Your kid is riding the little kid ride,

[15:57]you know?

[15:58]They've had funnel cake.

[16:00]You've had a full fair experience.

[16:01]But you're dad.

[16:03]You know, you've had a hard week.

[16:04]You gotta see some women stripping in the tent next door.

[16:08]You go in there.

[16:09]There is no air conditioning.

[16:10]It is going to be so hot.

[16:11]It's full of guys watching women strip.

[16:13]That would be one of the hottest places ever.

[16:15]Alan Jackson makes a great point.

[16:17]What would the announcer sound like

[16:18]if they were the announcer at the hoochie-coochie, Rob?

[16:28]Here comes Ginger.

[16:29]Ginger, come on up to the stage.

[16:31]Quit your grinning and drop your linen, Ginger.

[16:35]By the way, we also have Star coming around.

[16:39]She's got mini-donuts.

[16:40]Mini-donuts, Star, from the fair.

[16:42]You want some mini-donuts?

[16:43]Feel free.

[16:43]I mean, would that be the perfect night, right?

[16:48]I mean, we talked about the perfect day last episode,

[16:50]but the perfect night might be you're in the hoochie-coochie tent

[16:53]eating mini-donuts, I think.

[16:54]Actually doing anything and also eating mini-donuts.

[16:57]Really?

[16:58]Whatever.

[16:58]Have you guys ever gone to a hoochie-coochie

[17:00]with someone who claimed they only wanted to go there

[17:02]to get the tater tots?

[17:03]Because I have.

[17:06]Tater tots.

[17:09]That sounds even worse.

[17:10]That sounds super dirty.

[17:11]Well, guys, I hope you enjoyed that new segment

[17:13]on Beck Did It Better, Video Breakdown.

[17:16]Yeah, that was good.

[17:19]I like that.

[17:20]Excellent.

[17:21]Well, we have lots and lots of voicemails and text,

[17:24]so that definitely wasn't the reason for it.

[17:26]We don't have a voicemail?

[17:27]Seriously, how many people do you think listen to this a week?

[17:31]Are we under 10?

[17:32]I don't know.

[17:35]I think on this podcast, we're under three,

[17:38]so I think that's not a good sign.

[17:39]Listen, let's get into it.

[17:43]Let's talk about what we're up to.

[17:44]Let's talk about rolling and going

[17:45]and not think about who's listening and not listening.

[17:47]It's time for rolling and going.

[17:53]I assume what's going to happen

[17:55]is that this is going to be some sort of

[17:57]that one of us are going to pass out

[17:59]before 3 a.m. tonight?

[18:01]No, no.

[18:01]I assume this is going to be one of those situations

[18:03]of like, we're famous artists,

[18:05]but we're going to die before we get famous.

[18:07]You know what I mean?

[18:08]Like, this podcast is going to be in a museum somewhere

[18:10]and everybody will be like,

[18:11]wow, they were really underappreciated

[18:12]while they were alive.

[18:14]Yeah, I think you're right.

[18:15]I can't believe they all went tubing with a guitar

[18:18]and died because you shouldn't do that.

[18:20]And then they pulled Russell's hat out of the water

[18:22]at the end.

[18:22]And do a nice cowboy hat.

[18:24]Speaking of Russell, rolling and going,

[18:26]how's it going with you?

[18:26]Rolling and going.

[18:27]Things are going great.

[18:28]Last week I told you guys I went up north

[18:30]and on my way up north, I went to a wine bar.

[18:33]It was a great time.

[18:33]Another thing I did up north for the first time

[18:36]is I went out brunching at a restaurant

[18:37]called the Red Stew in Bemidji.

[18:39]The Red Stew.

[18:40]It's kind of like the hot brunch spot in Bemidji.

[18:43]What's the Red Stew?

[18:45]Now, Russell, how hot was it?

[18:47]Hotter than the Chattahoochee?

[18:51]That's not what the line is.

[18:53]So I went up north.

[18:57]I went up way up yonder

[18:59]past the Chattahoochee in Bemidji.

[19:01]Wait, am I missing it?

[19:03]What's the joke?

[19:04]Hoochie Coochie.

[19:05]It's hot.

[19:05]I don't know what a Hoochie Coochie is.

[19:06]Go ahead.

[19:08]So anyways, this Red Stew restaurant

[19:11]is famous for having these cinnamon rolls

[19:13]that are huge.

[19:14]They're like the size of a pizza,

[19:15]a $10 cinnamon roll.

[19:17]And they have a new cinnamon roll each month.

[19:19]And can you guys want to guess

[19:21]what the cinnamon roll of the month was for this month?

[19:23]No, wait.

[19:26]What?

[19:26]What?

[19:27]Cinnamon roll?

[19:28]So there's flavors of cinnamon rolls?

[19:29]If anyone wants to check it out,

[19:31]go to Red Stew, R-E-D Stew, S-T-U.

[19:34]It's a restaurant in Bemidji.

[19:36]It's kind of like the hot brunch spot in Bemidji.

[19:38]Was it an M&M cinnamon roll?

[19:40]It was not, but it was hot.

[19:42]It was hotter than a Chattahoochee, Rob?

[19:45]Oh, my God.

[19:46]A Hoochie Coochie?

[19:47]A cayenne cinnamon roll?

[19:48]You're going to give them that hat pretty soon.

[19:50]But it was called the Campfire S'mores Roll.

[19:52]A cinnamon roll incorporated in cream cheese,

[19:55]frosting, drizzled with milk,

[19:57]milk chocolate, marshmallow whip,

[19:59]and graham cracker crumble.

[20:00]Holy shit.

[20:01]And the thing came out, and it was legit.

[20:03]You know when people talk about food being big,

[20:05]and they're just saying that because they want to act

[20:08]like they're not going to eat it all in front of other people?

[20:10]This thing was legit huge.

[20:12]It looked like it came out like a pizza.

[20:16]Whoa.

[20:18]And it was a s'more cinnamon roll.

[20:21]A s'more cinnamon roll.

[20:22]So they have a monthly roll,

[20:24]but they also have another cinnamon roll

[20:26]that they're very famous.

[20:27]It's called the Cinnamon Roll French Toast Casserole.

[20:31]How do you guys feel about a cinnamon roll

[20:34]French toast casserole?

[20:35]I feel like I need a nap already.

[20:37]That makes me hotter than a Hoochie Coochie.

[20:39]I thought you would like that, Rob.

[20:42]Oh, my God.

[20:43]But so I went to this place called the Red Stew,

[20:45]had these amazing cinnamon rolls.

[20:47]And while I was there, you guys know I'm a bruncher.

[20:49]I like kind of going checking out new restaurants.

[20:51]And so they had mimosas and Bloody Marys,

[20:55]but they didn't really have any other food.

[20:57]They had some other brunch-style cocktails.

[20:58]And I didn't really know what to do

[20:59]because I'm not really a mimosa person.

[21:01]I'm not a Bloody Mary person.

[21:03]So I was curious, what is your guys' brunch style

[21:05]when it comes to breakfast drinks?

[21:07]Do you do mimosas, Bloody Marys,

[21:09]or are you looking for something else?

[21:10]Coffee.

[21:12]I'm looking for coffee.

[21:13]Coffee.

[21:13]Yeah.

[21:14]Well, we know Russell's not going to do that.

[21:17]He's not going to.

[21:17]He might get some hot chocolate, but no coffee.

[21:21]That coffee gets hotter than a Chattahoochie, right?

[21:24]Yep, you're right, Russell.

[21:25]You nailed it.

[21:27]I've never had a mimosa, Russell,

[21:28]where at the end I said,

[21:29]oh, wow, that was really worth it.

[21:31]It's always too sour and too sweet.

[21:33]What if it was a pineapple orange mimosa

[21:36]or a tropical mimosa?

[21:37]Because the Red Stew has like six flavors of mimosas.

[21:40]One of them was a blueberry lemon mimosa.

[21:43]What do you think of that?

[21:44]I don't know.

[21:45]I have been trying to eat more pineapple lately.

[21:47]Where do the blueberries and the lemons come from?

[21:50]I'm also not really a mimosa guy.

[21:52]I'll drink one if it's in front of me.

[21:53]I like a Bloody Mary, but as you guys know,

[21:55]I'm shot in a beer.

[21:56]So the last time I went out for brunch and drank

[21:58]was actually in Phoenix with my brother

[22:00]and they happen to have old-styling cans

[22:02]at this place called The Larder in the Delta.

[22:04]So I think I had a couple old-styles

[22:06]and a shot of Mezcal.

[22:07]So that's usually where I go.

[22:08]You're just a shot in a beer,

[22:09]whether it's brunch or not.

[22:11]I mean, why not?

[22:12]Yeah, it's a good time.

[22:13]When's a bad time to go shot in a beer?

[22:14]I respect that.

[22:16]I think a brunch, you could do whiskey on the rocks, right?

[22:18]There's nothing wrong with that.

[22:19]You're drinking.

[22:20]You're drinking.

[22:21]Yeah, let's get into it.

[22:23]Let's do it.

[22:23]And then give me one of those big fucking cinnamon rolls.

[22:26]No, I don't have to leave.

[22:28]You're being belligerent.

[22:29]Your blood sugar is spiking, you know, stuff like that.

[22:34]We might have to post this on the Instagram.

[22:36]I was also told by one of our listeners today

[22:39]that our Instagram has been pretty weak lately.

[22:41]I don't know if I forwarded you guys that one or not, but...

[22:44]No, that's fine.

[22:46]Don't mind getting criticized.

[22:47]It's cool.

[22:48]Once again, Rob's not concerned.

[22:50]Well, you know, those three likes that we got

[22:52]and everything we posted, you know,

[22:53]that's really motivating to keep going.

[22:55]Yeah, one of them is usually me.

[22:56]Or maybe the no voicemails leading to us

[22:59]watching a video from 1992.

[23:00]It could be anything.

[23:01]I mean...

[23:02]It's a good video.

[23:02]It's a great video.

[23:04]Better than most of the voicemails we get, actually.

[23:05]Are we watching Crazy by Aerosmith next?

[23:09]Is that the next video breakdown?

[23:10]We've already done that breakdown, man, believe it or not.

[23:14]Oh, shit.

[23:15]Holy shit.

[23:16]There is the picture.

[23:16]I will send you guys the picture for Instagram

[23:18]of the s'mores cinnamon roll.

[23:20]So did you eat it?

[23:22]Did you try it?

[23:23]Aaron, of course I ate it.

[23:26]What's yours?

[23:26]What's the review?

[23:27]It was fantastic.

[23:29]It was amazing.

[23:29]It was a must-do.

[23:31]I must say, though, I'm a bigger fan of the French,

[23:34]the cinnamon roll French toast casserole.

[23:37]That had a little more to it than the regular s'mores.

[23:41]You had two different cinnamon roll items at this restaurant.

[23:44]So hold on.

[23:44]So hold on.

[23:45]Can I talk?

[23:47]Can I talk?

[23:48]When I was talking mini donuts, Russell was like,

[23:50]oh, that's amateur hour.

[23:51]Hold your hoochie-coochie.

[23:52]So this place has, like, good, you know,

[23:54]they've got good food beyond the cinnamon roll.

[23:55]They've got, like, frittata.

[23:56]They've got stuff that Aaron would talk about some guy

[23:59]in some movie flipping over perfectly.

[24:00]Like, you know, they had, like, eggs,

[24:03]and they had, like, all your brunch things.

[24:04]So, like, me and the fellow brunch driver I'm with,

[24:07]the foodie, we're like, well, let's,

[24:09]we're going to get some normal food.

[24:10]We're not just going to get the cinnamon rolls.

[24:11]We'll get, like, normal, you know,

[24:12]like some sort of egg or scramble or something like that.

[24:15]And we decided to get the cinnamon roll of the month,

[24:20]the s'mores roll, which is $10, so it's huge.

[24:23]And so it's not a price thing, but it's like,

[24:26]you know, we're probably,

[24:26]we're probably not eating both of them,

[24:27]but the brunch driver I'm with, the foodie was like,

[24:30]well, we need to try them both.

[24:31]And I'm not going to argue with that.

[24:33]So we got them both, but then immediately

[24:35]we became the people at the bar where, like,

[24:37]you have way too much food in front of you.

[24:39]And then, like, people are looking at you.

[24:41]So it's like, is this buddy that you're with,

[24:42]this big dude that you're with, like,

[24:44]I mean, can he put this stuff down?

[24:45]Is that, I mean, is it like one of those things?

[24:48]I'm so happy.

[24:49]So it's not a big deal?

[24:54]I will just say,

[24:56]I will just say this.

[24:57]We did have to take the s'mores roll home,

[24:59]and we had to take part of the cinnamon toast,

[25:02]french toast casserole home as well.

[25:04]What kind of friend is this?

[25:06]What kind of friend is this that doesn't want to just put this down?

[25:08]Boy, I would yell at this guy.

[25:10]When you say home, at what point do you, like,

[25:11]at what point do you split up the leftovers and send some to their house

[25:14]and take some to your house?

[25:15]When you say home, I mean.

[25:17]It almost makes you wonder when this friend's going to become a roommate.

[25:20]It would just be simpler, I would think,

[25:21]to bring this stuff to one home.

[25:23]I don't know.

[25:23]There was a point where we had to disagree,

[25:25]but when we refilled,

[25:26]we reheated it in a microwave.

[25:27]We were up north,

[25:28]and Kohl's Resort has microwaves here,

[25:30]and they don't have toaster ovens.

[25:32]Oh, that's fancy.

[25:32]Very fancy.

[25:33]We decided to reheat both of these leftovers in a microwave,

[25:36]and then we may or may not have had a disagreement

[25:39]about who ate more of the leftovers,

[25:41]and that maybe I ate more than my fair share

[25:44]of the cinnamon roll, french toast casserole.

[25:47]Do you guys ever have that,

[25:48]where you're splitting something with maybe a friend

[25:51]or someone that you're a roommate with,

[25:54]and then you ate more than your fair share?

[25:56]Or maybe you're just.

[25:56]You're just rooming with them up north,

[25:57]you know, or whatever.

[25:58]And you get to that moment where it's like,

[26:01]oh, is there any left for me?

[26:02]And you're like, oh, no,

[26:03]I thought you already had all of the bites

[26:05]you were going to have.

[26:06]Oh, terribly sorry for that oversight.

[26:08]Then Russell yells,

[26:10]puts his hand on the glass and water skis.

[26:12]I've had enough.

[26:14]I'm going water skiing.

[26:15]I'm out of here.

[26:15]I may or may not have also been told this weekend

[26:18]that this was the first time where I didn't let this foodie

[26:21]have like the last bite of something,

[26:23]where I've essentially claimed the last bite of something.

[26:26]Oh, no.

[26:26]And they said this was the first time that happened.

[26:29]And I was made aware of that.

[26:31]That's not very Minnesotan of you.

[26:32]No.

[26:33]Next step.

[26:35]Roommates, I think.

[26:36]I think that's the next step

[26:37]when you're not thinking about that other person like that.

[26:40]Russell, you had so much.

[26:43]I just got to say this.

[26:45]To go up north and room with this foodie

[26:48]after you've eaten and drank so much fruit in one day,

[26:52]that's wild to me.

[26:53]If I had that much fruit between all the fruit you had.

[26:56]The bread was on day one.

[26:57]The brunch was on day two.

[26:59]They were split apart.

[27:00]Oh, but you had fruit with that breakfast, too.

[27:03]I mean, that's so much.

[27:03]That would just destroy me.

[27:05]What do you mean fruit with the breakfast?

[27:06]There was no fruit with this breakfast.

[27:07]Oh, there was no fruit?

[27:08]Oh, my God.

[27:11]It was just cinnamon rolls.

[27:12]Cinnamon rolls and eggs and bacon.

[27:15]You're right.

[27:16]That sounds good for your stomach.

[27:17]I'm wrong.

[27:17]Sorry about that.

[27:18]That's my bad.

[27:19]All good there.

[27:21]No concerns.

[27:21]Should we do a thing?

[27:23]I'm thinking, guys.

[27:24]Should we do a thing where when you're doing the rolling,

[27:26]going, that when you think it's over,

[27:28]you say to somebody, what's rolling going with you,

[27:31]or do you want me to do it?

[27:32]Matt, we're only going what's happening with you.

[27:35]That sounds pretty good.

[27:37]I'm dying to hear Aaron's, by the way.

[27:39]Cannot wait.

[27:40]We'll just save that.

[27:42]We'll let that one marinate for a little bit.

[27:43]I'm going to go before Aaron.

[27:44]We'll go to you next, Rob.

[27:45]Yeah, thank you.

[27:45]We'll let Aaron go last.

[27:46]How about that?

[27:46]Oh, wow.

[27:47]Geez, I hope I can live up to it.

[27:48]We're into the fall, right?

[27:51]So we've got a lot of things happening.

[27:52]The Twins, Major League Baseball.

[27:56]I think it's good again.

[27:57]Autumn Classic.

[27:58]I had one already, by the way.

[27:59]Delish.

[28:00]What'd you have?

[28:01]I missed it.

[28:02]The pumpkin spice iced coffee from Starbucks.

[28:04]Hey, if you're a hater, fuck you.

[28:07]It is delicious.

[28:08]The Twins are in a real hot race, aren't they?

[28:13]You know, Twins are getting good,

[28:17]and watching the Twins get good,

[28:18]they're just going to rip our heart out again.

[28:20]So by the time this episode comes out,

[28:21]they'll probably be out of the playoffs.

[28:23]But at least for right now, it's kind of fun to watch.

[28:26]Just a little bit.

[28:26]Just a little bit.

[28:27]All they have to do is win the AL Central.

[28:29]It's not that big a deal.

[28:30]No.

[28:31]Or that hard.

[28:32]To do that was like plus 400.

[28:34]It would be great if they won the AL Central.

[28:36]I'm a huge Twins fan right now.

[28:37]Yep.

[28:38]Yep.

[28:39]I was going to say that my favorite hoochie-coochie experience

[28:44]is there was one of our friends that lost a sweatshirt

[28:46]at a hoochie-coochie place one time

[28:48]and still talks about losing the sweatshirt.

[28:50]You know, never got it back,

[28:52]and he's still pretty bitter about it.

[28:53]But were there tater tots?

[28:55]I don't know if there's tater tots there.

[28:58]Oh, that's what you call them, Russell?

[29:00]I mean, you should just say breasts.

[29:01]Well, it also comes with the fall.

[29:07]Can I say this?

[29:08]Your friend who lost a sweatshirt,

[29:09]did he not understand how a hoochie-coochie place worked?

[29:12]I don't think so.

[29:13]You don't take the clothes off.

[29:14]I don't think so.

[29:16]When he's like, quit your grinning and drop your linen.

[29:18]He's not talking to you.

[29:19]He was from a different state, though,

[29:20]and I think they do things a little different over there.

[29:22]You're a flirt.

[29:23]Take off that sweatshirt.

[29:25]I can't remember if he's on all of the text chains we're on

[29:29]or just some of them.

[29:30]I can't remember.

[29:31]He got dropped from one.

[29:34]Oh, I can't believe.

[29:35]He got dropped from one.

[29:36]Somebody dropped him from one.

[29:37]Literally, it's a source of stress in my life.

[29:40]It should not be.

[29:41]But the Vikings are also starting up again,

[29:45]and I know Russell hates sports

[29:46]and never watches sports anymore,

[29:48]but I don't watch sports other than the Vikings.

[29:52]Every Sunday, yes.

[29:53]Hey, Matt, thanks for showing up.

[29:55]Thank you.

[29:55]I watched our fantasy football draft the other night.

[29:57]I showed up.

[29:58]Hey, that went nice and quick, guys.

[30:01]Good work.

[30:02]Rob was the slowest guy.

[30:03]It was literally everyone in the league, Matt,

[30:05]was on the Zoom call.

[30:07]We were all chatting.

[30:07]We were having a good time.

[30:08]Yeah, you know, when you schedule the draft

[30:12]like four days before you actually have the draft,

[30:15]I mean, it's not like anybody else

[30:16]has got anything else going on in their life.

[30:17]Oh, here we go.

[30:18]We should schedule it.

[30:18]Here we go.

[30:19]When does fantasy football start?

[30:21]I don't know.

[30:22]This just surprises.

[30:23]Every year, it just comes up on us.

[30:25]When should we have this draft?

[30:26]If only somebody would have reminded me

[30:28]like two or three weeks out.

[30:30]Yeah, or maybe like in July.

[30:32]Like, hey, are we going to do this?

[30:33]Maybe we should have set a date for the draft.

[30:35]Yeah, if only somebody would have done that.

[30:37]That's fine.

[30:39]Don't mind criticism.

[30:40]It doesn't bother me.

[30:40]Yeah, I got you.

[30:41]But the Vikings come in,

[30:43]so I'm trying to get...

[30:44]I want to say this, Matt.

[30:45]It was you, then not on the Zoom,

[30:46]and then somebody else in the league

[30:48]who we asked to get on the Zoom,

[30:49]and they informed us they don't have Zoom.

[30:51]It was the craziest thing I've ever heard in my life

[30:54]that they didn't have Zoom.

[30:55]I don't have...

[30:57]Which means you don't have the internet?

[30:59]Right.

[30:59]You don't have Zoom.

[31:01]I was like, the what-demic?

[31:03]Like, what?

[31:04]I mean, who doesn't have Zoom?

[31:06]COVID-19, huh?

[31:08]Like, who doesn't?

[31:09]It's craziness.

[31:11]Maybe they could have afforded Zoom

[31:13]if Rob would have paid them

[31:14]for their hotel in Vegas, Rob.

[31:15]Oh, my God.

[31:16]Yeah, there you go.

[31:18]It's another source of stress.

[31:20]Well, you could always...

[31:22]It's because he lived at the gym.

[31:23]Oh, I'm sorry.

[31:24]Okay, I'm sorry.

[31:24]I'm done, I'm done.

[31:25]Go ahead.

[31:26]I'm sorry, Matt.

[31:27]Go ahead.

[31:27]What we have learned

[31:29]is three things you don't do in the world, right?

[31:31]Yes.

[31:32]Yeah.

[31:33]You don't rip the cape off of Superman.

[31:36]No, no, no.

[31:37]True.

[31:37]You don't rip the mask off of Batman.

[31:40]No way.

[31:40]No, no.

[31:41]And you don't just never, ever, ever

[31:44]lend money to Jeff.

[31:46]Those are the three things you don't do in the world.

[31:48]You can't do it.

[31:49]You just can't do it.

[31:51]Three things you don't do in the world.

[31:52]Maybe peeing in the wind, too.

[31:55]3B.

[31:56]Yeah.

[31:58]So the Vikings are up,

[32:02]and I want three hours every week

[32:05]to set aside,

[32:07]and I'm trying to get my boys excited

[32:10]about watching the Vikings.

[32:11]So I'm doing everything I can to play up like,

[32:13]guys, the Vikings are playing the Packers this week.

[32:17]We have to celebrate.

[32:20]We have to get ready for the game.

[32:22]So I'm getting them excited about watching football.

[32:24]It's a party.

[32:25]Bob, you have a strong connection with football

[32:29]and your dad, right?

[32:30]But you guys used to go to the games and everything.

[32:32]Is that right?

[32:33]Oh, it's a huge part of what we talk about.

[32:36]Do your daughters watch football with you now?

[32:36]Do you watch football anymore?

[32:38]Or what's your Viking watching these days?

[32:40]I watch tons of football.

[32:41]I watch all the Vikings.

[32:42]I got to admit, since I've been putting five bucks on a game,

[32:45]I watch more sports than I used to.

[32:47]But my girls have tried watching with me,

[32:49]and it just hasn't taken.

[32:51]So I let it go.

[32:52]Yeah.

[32:52]By the boys, they're getting into it.

[32:55]They understand the hatred for the Packers.

[33:01]Yeah.

[33:01]And it's not real hatred.

[33:03]It's just sports hatred.

[33:05]Sports hatred.

[33:06]Which makes it even more fun.

[33:08]But having $5 on a game is even more fun than sports hatred, usually.

[33:13]Especially maybe if the friend advises you to take the Gophers to not cover.

[33:19]I didn't advise you.

[33:20]I didn't advise you.

[33:21]So, Matt, if you can convince your sons to be into football,

[33:25]that counts as a win.

[33:25]That counts as family time,

[33:26]which means you should have three hours of Matt time somewhere else in the day.

[33:29]You know what?

[33:31]Is that how it works?

[33:31]Russell, this...

[33:33]I agree with this.

[33:37]Yes.

[33:38]And I think we should just...

[33:39]We'll just implement that, okay?

[33:40]And if anybody has any problems,

[33:42]they can call into the Beck line and talk about it.

[33:43]Please do.

[33:45]Sweetie, I need some me time.

[33:49]This has been we time.

[33:50]Because we've been watching the Vikings.

[33:52]It's so good.

[33:55]But it used to be when they were younger,

[33:56]you know, I would take...

[33:58]It would be like four hours in the morning of going to the zoo

[34:02]and going to the Mall of America and all this stuff

[34:04]so that I could get three hours.

[34:06]But now, no, no, no, no, that's weak.

[34:07]Now I need to get that time back.

[34:09]You're right, Russell.

[34:10]I think, yeah.

[34:12]For me, the hardest part of parenting is making sure

[34:14]their devices are fully charged

[34:16]so they don't bug me about it.

[34:18]You know what I mean?

[34:18]Like, just plug it in the wall.

[34:21]You're sitting there anyway.

[34:21]Like, let's do it.

[34:22]That's good.

[34:24]Rob, rolling, going.

[34:25]How's it going with you?

[34:26]Whenever Rob does this, it worries me he's making something up.

[34:32]I don't want to talk about this,

[34:34]but it's what I've written down, so I have to.

[34:36]Oh, let's talk about it.

[34:37]Oh, okay, I'll tear it.

[34:37]Have you ever seen somebody, like, that has augmented breasts?

[34:42]Right?

[34:43]Speaking of the hoochie-coochie place,

[34:44]they have augmented breasts.

[34:45]I was too busy eating the tater tots.

[34:47]I wasn't paying attention to that.

[34:49]The breasts sometimes, you know,

[34:50]have you ever seen where they get so big,

[34:52]you're like, wow, that's kind of, it doesn't look right.

[34:54]You know, it's kind of strange.

[34:55]And you hate to say that.

[34:56]You hate to judge people.

[34:56]But I was thinking about this when I was walking the dog,

[34:59]and there's no reason that this would come into my mind

[35:01]while I'm walking the dog,

[35:01]that if men could do the same plastic surgery

[35:06]but change their penis size,

[35:08]it would be way, way worse.

[35:10]Like, the proportions would be so bad.

[35:13]People would just go crazy.

[35:14]I mean, if you could do plastic surgery

[35:16]to make your dick any size,

[35:17]you would make it ridiculously big every time, right?

[35:20]Like, crazy big.

[35:23]Like, you know,

[35:25]bodybuilders, like, impressed guys,

[35:27]women aren't that attracted to them

[35:28]because they're so big.

[35:29]That's what my penis would look like.

[35:31]I think it would look like a bodybuilder, but a penis.

[35:33]There's, like, veins popping out.

[35:35]So what would...

[35:36]God damn, Aaron.

[35:38]So would guys be judging other guys,

[35:40]like, with the size of their increase?

[35:42]You'd be looking at it and be like,

[35:43]oh, that's totally fake.

[35:44]And then...

[35:45]Yes.

[35:45]You would feel like the Aarons of the world

[35:48]who said they have a carving knife

[35:50]or whatever he called it the one time

[35:52]would look at it and be like,

[35:53]have no respect for the people that...

[35:55]They're calling him a penis.

[35:56]...that were artificially enhanced or what?

[35:59]Oh, 1,000%.

[36:01]I mean, here, wait a minute.

[36:02]I have so many...

[36:04]I mean, I have so many...

[36:05]No, I've always said...

[36:06]No, like, I love having a penis.

[36:07]I've always said, like,

[36:08]it's the greatest thing now.

[36:10]Like...

[36:10]That's one clip.

[36:11]Now, listen, here's the second one.

[36:12]I absolutely love my penis.

[36:15]Like, I wouldn't trade it for anyone else's penis.

[36:17]That's the second clip I have of him.

[36:18]Now, listen to this.

[36:19]Here's the third.

[36:20]I would compare it to my favorite chef's knife

[36:22]because I use it every day.

[36:23]I mean...

[36:25]And that's not even this one.

[36:28]That's what I'm going to start calling him a penis.

[36:29]That's a whole separate bit.

[36:30]I'm starting to think I have an obsession with something, okay?

[36:36]Or Rosie does.

[36:38]Rob, when you're playing those all together

[36:39]and then you're reorganizing it,

[36:41]so you have to have, like,

[36:42]an eight-minute period of your life some weekend

[36:44]where this is all you're thinking about, right?

[36:46]Yeah, I just go through and I'm like,

[36:48]oh, what's this one?

[36:48]Like, I'll be like, oh,

[36:49]I haven't played this one in a while.

[36:51]That's what I call my penis.

[36:52]You know, like...

[36:53]But I have to stay on top of it.

[36:55]It's tough.

[36:58]It's important, no.

[36:59]It's a hard job.

[37:00]Yeah.

[37:01]You could isolate it's hard there.

[37:05]There was a pause where you could isolate it's hard.

[37:08]Rob, what percentage of men do you think

[37:12]would take advantage of this enhancement surgery

[37:14]if it were an easier process?

[37:16]110%, because I'd go there twice.

[37:21]I'd be like,

[37:25]listen, these doctors in America,

[37:27]they don't want you to actually have freedoms.

[37:30]They want to limit the size of your penis.

[37:31]That's why I'm down here in Nicaragua

[37:33]getting the biggest penis I possibly can worldwide.

[37:35]I'm getting legal penis surgery.

[37:38]I'm getting that cement, like, injected in.

[37:40]Bigger, bigger, bigger.

[37:41]Let's go.

[37:42]It's...

[37:45]You need to carry around pencils when you're going...

[37:48]Exactly.

[37:49]I got to pencil it up when I'm going to the bathroom.

[37:50]I'm going to use...

[37:52]I'm going to have to use the kid's urinal.

[37:55]That's how big it is.

[37:56]Otherwise, it's going to be down there snaking that drain.

[37:58]The boner came at the Timberwolves game

[38:03]would be a completely different experience.

[38:05]Oh, my God.

[38:06]Right?

[38:06]They need to put the wide lens on.

[38:08]Zoom out.

[38:08]I mean, you'd see it.

[38:11]I'm just...

[38:11]They'd trip on it on the court.

[38:12]That's what I'm talking about.

[38:13]I'm just imagining all of the dozens of listeners that we have.

[38:19]And a lot of them are female.

[38:21]I don't think it's dozens.

[38:21]Just loving the section.

[38:22]Just really enjoying it.

[38:23]None of whom...

[38:25]None of whom have ever given feedback that we may or may not talk about Rob's genitalia too much.

[38:31]Well, that was just my mother.

[38:32]I was going to say, I apologize to Patty because she has actually called me on the phone personally

[38:36]and said, please stop talking about your penis.

[38:37]And I want to be clear.

[38:39]I wasn't talking about mine.

[38:40]I was talking about everyone's and a fake one of mine.

[38:43]So if you're mad at that, you're actually mad at yourself.

[38:45]So, like, Rob, what do you think would be the optimal, like, increase size?

[38:49]Are you talking like a 20% increase?

[38:51]A 50% increase?

[38:52]Like, what do you think would be the optimal increase?

[38:55]Let's see.

[38:55]20% of two.

[38:57]Is that 20%?

[38:59]That's tough.

[39:00]No, I don't know.

[39:03]I just think, I just think in general, wouldn't you just, like, best size?

[39:06]Honestly, I would probably double mine.

[39:08]And I'm not kidding.

[39:09]Double it.

[39:10]Two carving knives?

[39:14]Two carving knives.

[39:16]Like a fucking chainsaw.

[39:17]I mean, this is like a Boston and...

[39:20]What was that restaurant?

[39:21]Fuck, Rob.

[39:21]Pull this.

[39:22]Boston Market?

[39:23]This is like a Boston Market up in here.

[39:24]There's...

[39:25]There's multiple carving knives everywhere.

[39:26]My nickname would be Arby's.

[39:30]We have the meat.

[39:33]And Arby's would be for Rob's boner.

[39:35]So a lot of people...

[39:37]Arby's.

[39:38]I don't feel like there would be this moment of pride either, Rob, when you would take your pants off.

[39:42]I mean, I know you said you don't, you normally didn't do that.

[39:45]It would take a while for you to get to that point with the lady.

[39:47]Oh my God, I forgot I had said that.

[39:49]But, but like, I don't think you would have any sort of pride in saying, like, it's all natural, right?

[39:54]Like, like...

[39:55]No.

[39:55]No.

[39:56]No.

[39:57]This would be the first thing I'd tell him.

[39:59]It'd be like, hey, I'm like RoboCop down there.

[40:02]Do you think if people saw your enhancement, they didn't know that it was enhancement?

[40:10]They'd start looking at your dad a little different?

[40:12]That's all I think about.

[40:18]I also wonder if they wouldn't call him Little Rosie anymore, Matt, if they would have those enhancements.

[40:25]That's true.

[40:27]It would be like that balloon bit from Pee Wee, but it would just be me taking it out through the fly.

[40:32]Okay.

[40:36]We're yours, Ed's, mine, Ben's, right?

[40:41]Milton Berle style.

[40:46]That's right.

[40:47]Aaron, actually, we have run out of time, so we don't have time to talk about the album.

[40:53]Okay, Aaron, roll and go.

[40:55]How's it going with you?

[40:55]Well, quick update.

[40:57]I spend so much time wondering about what my rolling going's going to be.

[41:00]I think of, like, something that Rob's just like, if we could have penile implants, and here's my toothbrush.

[41:06]Look it.

[41:07]Here are my notes.

[41:08]Right here.

[41:09]If you guys could do penises plastic surgery like girls could do their boobs, we would all have way bigger freakier dicks than even the biggest boobs in girls.

[41:17]Helmet bag?

[41:19]Helmet bag is next week.

[41:20]Don't look at that.

[41:20]Don't look at the helmet bag.

[41:22]Oh, you got to separate that there.

[41:25]So don't tell me I'm not putting time into this podcast, okay?

[41:27]Because we had the nice fig song to open, I do have to give an update.

[41:31]Yeah, again?

[41:33]Yeah, I spoke with a very nice young gentleman today who wanted to sell me solar panels on my house.

[41:38]So we chatted for a bit in the backyard, and he said, oh, yeah, by the way, thank you for the figs.

[41:43]And I have never, I've met this guy once, but I've never given him some figs.

[41:49]And it turns out that my neighbor, to whom I gave some figs, gave the figs away.

[41:55]Oh, damn.

[41:55]They re-gifted your gift.

[41:58]They re-gifted my figs.

[41:59]We're done.

[42:01]We've been seriously on it.

[42:02]We're done.

[42:03]No one would complain.

[42:04]We're done.

[42:05]They re-gifted your fig gift?

[42:08]Yeah, they gave my figs to the solar panels.

[42:10]I mean, what's worse?

[42:11]Like me throwing them in the garbage or re-gifting it?

[42:14]Yeah, they re-gifted the figs.

[42:16]Hey, awesome figs.

[42:17]And not only that, they re-gifted it and said, listen, dude, these ain't my figs, okay?

[42:23]These are my neighbor's figs.

[42:24]Thanks.

[42:25]Thank you for them.

[42:25]Yeah.

[42:26]Well, what they probably did is, oh, you're selling panels?

[42:29]Well, here, have some figs.

[42:31]You take these with you on the road.

[42:32]And oh, by the way, that's the guy that gave them to me.

[42:33]Why don't you go over?

[42:34]I'm sure he needs some solar panels.

[42:35]He probably needs solar panels, too.

[42:36]Yeah, right.

[42:37]Yeah, he sent them right over to you.

[42:38]Aaron, so is this a door-to-door salesman?

[42:41]Because I came across this the other day where in the COVID world, there was no door-to-door

[42:45]people coming and saying, hey, can I take that tree out?

[42:47]Can I redo your roof?

[42:49]Can I do this?

[42:50]Can I do that?

[42:50]That stuff has started happening again.

[42:52]And I got to tell you, it pisses me off.

[42:55]No.

[42:55]I do not like people ringing doorbells.

[42:58]Like, I've become used to no one ringing doorbells.

[43:01]Matt, what do you think of this?

[43:02]Well, two things.

[43:04]One, a doorbell, there's two screws, okay?

[43:07]You unscrew the top.

[43:08]You remove it.

[43:09]You unscrew the bottom.

[43:10]Sounds like my month.

[43:11]There's two wires that go in.

[43:12]You disconnect those wires.

[43:13]Oh, boy.

[43:14]You shove those wires back in the wall.

[43:16]That is some needle-banding shit right there.

[43:18]Put that doorbell right down.

[43:18]People start digging the doorbell.

[43:19]They don't have it.

[43:20]So we did this to our doorbell when we had kids, right?

[43:22]Because people would come up and you'd forget that it was like nap time.

[43:25]And they'd ring the doorbell and it was the worst thing because all of a sudden your kids

[43:29]are going to wake up from the doorbell.

[43:30]So we just disconnected it.

[43:31]Two, I have found it's very easy, very, very easy to just not answer the door.

[43:37]Yeah.

[43:37]Even if we are sitting right in the window and they're right there.

[43:39]I've done that about 70% of the time.

[43:41]But I've given in a few times.

[43:41]I'm watching TV and I can see them walk up.

[43:43]It's just, oh, you know what?

[43:45]I'm not going to answer the door.

[43:46]And they can see you.

[43:47]They can see you.

[43:47]Oh, yeah, for sure.

[43:49]And you're not answering the door.

[43:50]No.

[43:51]You're the strongest man I know.

[43:53]I'm with Matt.

[43:54]Like, I can see the door.

[43:55]I can see, like, the window of my door right through there.

[43:57]And so if I'm sitting there, they can see me sitting here.

[43:59]And I've held strong a few times, but I've also went and answered it a few times.

[44:03]One of the last times I answered it, they were like, I'm putting together a real estate

[44:09]empire and I'm looking to buy houses.

[44:11]Can I make it?

[44:12]Can I, like, would you be willing to sell your house?

[44:14]And I said, what's your offer?

[44:15]And they go, well, I'd have to look at the house first.

[44:17]And I said, you don't have an offer for me?

[44:19]Then I'm not interested.

[44:20]And he's like, oh, I would need to look at the house.

[44:23]I'm like, you're going to come to me and say,

[44:25]you want to buy my house?

[44:25]You better have a number down, you asshole.

[44:27]And if you don't, keep walking.

[44:29]And Russell was wearing his cowboy hat.

[44:32]So the guy was like, holy shit, this guy's a real man.

[44:35]I'll never be able to buy this house.

[44:37]That was kind of shitty.

[44:39]He's like, I'll never be able to afford this house.

[44:42]Look how rich this guy is.

[44:44]He looks like fucking.

[44:44]And then him and I grabbed some figs and we went out boogie boarding together

[44:51]after.

[44:51]This is one great thing about living in an apartment.

[44:53]If anyone, when somebody,

[44:55]brings my doorbell, I yell, come in because I know it's like my kid's friends.

[44:59]Nobody else is coming up and ringing my doorbell ever.

[45:02]They all get stopped at the front desk.

[45:03]Nobody can say, do any of that stuff.

[45:05]Nobody.

[45:05]It rules.

[45:07]It is awesome.

[45:08]Having a person who lives in your building and then says,

[45:11]hi, and buy it to you every day and collects all your packages.

[45:13]It's the best.

[45:14]I love it.

[45:14]Aaron, you, did you buy the solar panels from this guy?

[45:17]Can I just say, before you answer that, Aaron, before you answer that,

[45:20]imagine you're the solar panel guy, right?

[45:25]You stopped by to sell solar panel.

[45:26]Aaron then talks to you for 15 minutes and I, and I'm trying to be nice to Aaron.

[45:30]I really am.

[45:31]Just imagine that you're now talking to Aaron for 15 minutes about God knows what

[45:35]he's putting out all his figs.

[45:36]He's pointing.

[45:37]What did you, can you tell me what you talked about?

[45:39]Yeah, we talked about the spike ball.

[45:40]Uh, okay.

[45:42]Okay.

[45:42]Yeah.

[45:42]Okay.

[45:43]That's it.

[45:44]The thing, everybody thinks I mean, they really do.

[45:51]They're like, oh, you're so mean to Aaron was saying that to me.

[45:53]She's like, oh, you have these bits where you're.

[45:55]Mean.

[45:55]Mean to Aaron.

[45:55]You guys don't understand.

[45:57]I'm right.

[45:58]I know Aaron so well.

[46:00]When I said that he talked to the guy and he talked about spike ball.

[46:02]Yeah.

[46:03]Cause we got the spike ball net in the backyard and he was like, oh yeah, I love a spike ball.

[46:06]We play it all the time.

[46:07]I'm in charge of the, uh, like team building at the office.

[46:10]So we play a little spike ball.

[46:12]You let this guy come into the backyard.

[46:13]Yeah.

[46:14]He's very, very nice kid.

[46:17]Russell.

[46:17]What do you think of that?

[46:18]He knows the entire neighborhood.

[46:19]Have you not, have you not seen home alone?

[46:25]It's a wet bandit, Aaron.

[46:27]So Aaron, if you, if you like windows in the back.

[46:31]Yeah.

[46:31]Oh yeah.

[46:32]That one doesn't have a lock on it.

[46:33]Does it serve?

[46:34]Very interesting.

[46:35]Do you like to jack off?

[46:36]Hmm.

[46:37]If you engage him in real conversation for more than two to three minutes, I would say

[46:43]you're obligated to buy a solar panel from him.

[46:45]Oh God.

[46:46]I think that's, I mean, he's coming back on Tuesday to give me the real proposal.

[46:49]So I think that's where we're at.

[46:50]Wow.

[46:50]If he comes, if he comes back wearing a spike ball Jersey, look out.

[46:54]Yeah.

[46:55]He's not selling solar panels.

[46:56]So Aaron, do you think you're just kind of an easy mark for these door-to-door salesmen?

[47:02]Are there door-to-door people where you're like, oh, I'm just not interested in this

[47:05]moving along and you'd be a jerk like I would be, or do you think there's just more

[47:09]conversation about a product that might be useful?

[47:11]This is the only one.

[47:12]And in this case, it is a product that might be useful.

[47:14]And then it's this one company that has the whole neighborhood covered.

[47:17]So as soon as they see a house sold, they like go in and say like, oh, Hey, or they

[47:21]walk down the street and say like, oh, that's the one house on the street that doesn't have

[47:24]solar panels.

[47:25]I'm going to go knock on their door.

[47:26]What is the sale?

[47:27]You know, that like, what is it?

[47:29]They have to tell you, like, it's going to take you 13.7 years to make up the cost of

[47:35]this by the amount of energy you're saving.

[47:37]Like there has to be something that they tell you, right?

[47:40]Before and after we finish the podcast.

[47:41]Sir, this is worth 32 spike ball kits.

[47:44]The sale is you're going to end up paying, you know, 10 to 20% less than your current

[47:51]electric bill.

[47:52]And there's no money out of pocket because it's all fine.

[47:55]It's all financed or whatever.

[47:55]And then you also get a big tax credit.

[47:57]That's the, that's the.

[47:58]Oh, they know just where it is.

[48:00]All those things gave me a big dad boner.

[48:02]I liked all those.

[48:03]Right.

[48:03]Yeah.

[48:03]That was great.

[48:04]How do you pass up on that?

[48:05]And when I say big, look how big, I mean, I've gotten, I went to Nicaragua.

[48:08]Double the size.

[48:10]Six.

[48:11]Is it a double if you're a shower and a grower?

[48:15]Does it double everything or is it only double part?

[48:17]I was going to ask that question too.

[48:18]And then I left it off.

[48:19]Rob.

[48:20]Guys, we're talking about air and solar panels.

[48:24]What are we doing?

[48:25]No, we wanted to ask if it doubles everything or does it double every size

[48:29]or just at certain points?

[48:30]I think it would have to, right?

[48:31]Unless it's like that peewee's balloon where it just gets bigger when you

[48:34]blow it up.

[48:35]I don't.

[48:35]You'd have to double both.

[48:37]You think so?

[48:38]I think so.

[48:39]So here's the thing.

[48:42]Aaron will always buy stuff sold door to door.

[48:45]He can't help it.

[48:46]Aaron is a big sweetie.

[48:47]He's the sweetest guy I know.

[48:48]And I'm just going to prove it with this question.

[48:50]Aaron.

[48:51]Okay.

[48:52]If somebody rang your doorbell and you

[48:55]know they saw you through the window,

[48:56]could you possibly sit there and not answer the door?

[48:58]I would probably answer the door.

[49:00]Yeah.

[49:01]I would probably answer the door.

[49:02]You would do it a hundred percent of the time.

[49:04]Yeah.

[49:04]If I knew they saw me, I'd probably.

[49:06]Eye contact.

[49:07]I'm talking eye contact.

[49:08]They look in, you look at them.

[49:09]It's eye contact is the worst.

[49:11]Yeah.

[49:11]No, then I'd answer the door.

[49:12]Yeah.

[49:13]Then I would answer the door.

[49:14]Seriously.

[49:15]The guy could have at least had an offer for me though.

[49:17]You can't come to my house to read the doorbell.

[49:18]You can't just show up with no number.

[49:20]Even low ball it.

[49:21]He's like, Hey, did that rich guy with the cowboy hat buy a,

[49:24]did he sell you his house?

[49:26]And the guy's like, no, I rang the doorbell.

[49:28]He's in there eating a giant cinnamon roll.

[49:31]He looks at me, takes the last bite, does not answer the door.

[49:35]It was the craziest thing I've ever seen.

[49:37]He keeps talking about the hoochie coochie in there.

[49:40]And then I went next door.

[49:41]And I went next door to Matt's house.

[49:44]He's watching this Pee Wee Herman balloon video over and over and over,

[49:47]not answering the door.

[49:48]Cannot help me.

[49:49]But see, here's the thing.

[49:50]It goes quicker, right?

[49:51]If they know that, you know, that they know that, you know,

[49:54]that they're there and then they say, Oh, he knows I'm here.

[49:57]He's not answering the door.

[49:58]Then they get out even faster.

[49:59]And if they're hanging around, maybe somebody else,

[50:02]they go to the other door.

[50:03]Cause some of us have a two doors with two doorbell on each side.

[50:08]You have a two door style house.

[50:09]So then they're like, well, maybe they didn't hear that doorbell.

[50:11]I'm going to go to the side door and ring that doorbell.

[50:13]He comes by, he sees Russell unscrew the doorbell.

[50:19]And he's like, wait a minute.

[50:24]So Matt, after you did that, did you have so much Halloween candy?

[50:30]Cause you're like, Hey, nobody's coming for Halloween.

[50:33]I haven't heard the doorbell once.

[50:34]No.

[50:35]I mean, we just, I mean, usually we're taking the kids out.

[50:38]So we're not there for Halloween anyway.

[50:40]So, you know, we do the old bowl thing and then leave the sign.

[50:43]Only take one, please.

[50:44]Cause then we know it's just going to be cleared out anyways.

[50:46]First Richfield kid that walks by there is taking that whole bucket.

[50:49]Exactly.

[50:50]But we still put out the sign just for the ironical nature.

[50:54]So we are talking about the 1940 74 court and spark by Joni Mitchell.

[51:00]And basically this is Joni Mitchell's sixth album.

[51:03]Okay.

[51:04]Since she made her first album in 1968,

[51:07]she released an album every year until 1973.

[51:10]It's the first year where she really took a break.

[51:12]And basically what happens is she kind of sat down.

[51:14]She, she said, you know, I've been doing this.

[51:16]I've been going so hard making this folk music.

[51:18]We heard blue that I want to start making kind of new music,

[51:24]but for the stuff that I'm interested in.

[51:25]And Aaron, you've mentioned it before.

[51:27]Guess what?

[51:28]Joni Mitchell got interested in that influenced this album.

[51:30]Jazz is 100% jazz.

[51:35]Is that real this time, Aaron or not?

[51:38]I think it is real this time.

[51:39]Yeah.

[51:39]I mean,

[51:40]she ends up recording an album with Charles Mingus later in her life.

[51:42]Yeah.

[51:43]Mingus, Mingus, Mingus.

[51:44]Yeah.

[51:46]We're so fucking smart.

[51:48]I think the album might be called Mingus.

[51:50]Yeah.

[51:50]I, um,

[51:52]Oh shit.

[51:53]What was that?

[51:54]What was I talking about?

[51:54]I think here's the problem.

[51:55]When you listen to the last couple of songs on this album,

[51:57]I think she's listening to shitty jazz.

[52:00]Right.

[52:00]She's listening to bad jazz.

[52:02]She's like going to the junior high jazz band and be like,

[52:04]God damn, I love jazz.

[52:05]I got to put this thing in my album.

[52:06]Yeah.

[52:07]There's some stuff at the end that it's not.

[52:08]I have strong opinions about the end of this album.

[52:10]Yeah.

[52:10]Not my favorite stuff either.

[52:11]This album.

[52:13]I, so basically,

[52:15]but this album is Joni Mitchell's most successful album by far.

[52:19]Higher than blue.

[52:20]This reached number two on the charts behind,

[52:24]uh,

[52:24]the late great Olivia Newton,

[52:25]John,

[52:25]and it was there for four album,

[52:28]four weeks.

[52:29]And basically this album,

[52:31]when we're talking,

[52:32]I don't mean to interrupt you,

[52:34]but I,

[52:34]I heard Olivia Newton.

[52:36]John was just splooting.

[52:37]She was not.

[52:38]Splooting.

[52:42]Is that right,

[52:44]Matt?

[52:44]Splooting.

[52:44]That was like last week.

[52:47]I don't remember back that far.

[52:48]I.

[52:49]Sorry.

[52:50]This show is so good.

[52:54]We're so smart.

[52:54]Squirrels.

[52:57]They're hot.

[52:57]So court and spark nominated for album of the year.

[53:01]Help me rec nominated for both record of the year and best female pop vocal

[53:05]performance.

[53:06]Joni Mitchell won a Grammy for,

[53:09]uh,

[53:10]best arrangement and accompanied vocals on this.

[53:12]This was up for four different Grammys for most successful album.

[53:15]It's it's,

[53:17]it's just wild.

[53:17]So here's the deal.

[53:18]Let's get into court and spark and Aaron,

[53:22]Aaron,

[53:23]Aaron,

[53:24]just like with a book.

[53:24]First thing you see.

[53:25]It's the titular track.

[53:27]Oh,

[53:27]open it up.

[53:29]We haven't had one of these in a while.

[53:30]Open it up.

[53:30]Let's see them.

[53:31]See them titular tracks.

[53:32]You think,

[53:36]you think that's definitely piano forward on a lot of these,

[53:39]right?

[53:39]Yeah.

[53:40]And again,

[53:44]Joni Mitchell's,

[53:45]we talked about it two weeks ago,

[53:46]playing with phrases,

[53:47]right?

[53:48]Like being able to take a phrase,

[53:49]twist it.

[53:50]I can tell you doing a parody song that he's,

[53:53]it's almost impossible.

[53:54]Oh yeah.

[53:54]She's all the way in her bag on this.

[53:56]And yeah,

[53:57]you can hear,

[53:57]it's fun to hear this just two weeks after Fiona Apple,

[53:59]cause you can hear the action.

[54:01]Totally.

[54:02]And,

[54:02]and,

[54:02]and,

[54:02]and in these songs,

[54:04]these early songs,

[54:04]I mean,

[54:05]she is bringing it.

[54:07]These are great songs.

[54:08]She's got the,

[54:08]she's got the piano,

[54:09]but now she's also adding,

[54:10]you could hear there like the steel guitar,

[54:12]right?

[54:13]We're going to hear more horns and strings.

[54:15]Isn't,

[54:15]isn't Graham Nash or David Crosby.

[54:18]Aren't they all on this,

[54:19]this record?

[54:19]Yep.

[54:19]Crosby and Nash.

[54:21]I don't see.

[54:22]No,

[54:23]Steven stills.

[54:24]No,

[54:24]he's always Robbie Robertson from the band.

[54:27]Oh yeah.

[54:27]Right.

[54:28]A bunch of players on here.

[54:29]And then we're,

[54:30]I was going to get to it later,

[54:31]but when we get to the final song is the background voices are.

[54:35]No,

[54:35]no,

[54:36]no.

[54:36]Yeah.

[54:37]Oh,

[54:37]cut it out.

[54:39]So in earlier this year,

[54:41]Joni Mitchell in 2022 was honored as music cares person of the year.

[54:45]And there was a concert honoring Joni Mitchell for this and St.

[54:49]Vincent.

[54:50]Oh,

[54:52]a band called St.

[54:53]Vincent,

[54:53]actually played court and spark at the,

[54:55]the concert honoring Joni Mitchell at this music cares.

[54:58]Turns out there was another musician that was also honoring Joni Mitchell at

[55:02]this.

[55:03]It was back back playing at every thing for Joni Mitchell.

[55:07]And he played a song called jungle line from his thing of his thing of

[55:12]summer lawns from 1975 recordings.

[55:15]Not great,

[55:16]but Beck is honoring Joni Mitchell here.

[55:18]Wow.

[55:19]He shows up to honor everybody.

[55:20]I believe he honored Lou Reed last time.

[55:23]If that didn't get cut.

[55:24]And this week he's honoring Joni Mitchell.

[55:26]So when it comes to honoring Joni Mitchell as the music cares person of the

[55:30]year,

[55:31]who did it better,

[55:31]Beck did it better.

[55:33]Yes,

[55:34]he did.

[55:35]This recording is a wild one.

[55:37]Russell.

[55:38]Trust me.

[55:38]I tried hard.

[55:39]I looked at Vimeo on the ones you,

[55:41]you mock us for Rob and I couldn't find a better one.

[55:44]That's wow.

[55:45]Now probably one of the most popular songs off this album.

[55:48]Help me.

[55:49]She got LA,

[55:50]LA express is the backup band.

[55:53]This album.

[55:54]So quiet.

[55:54]This is Joni Mitchell.

[55:57]This is Joni Mitchell's only top 10 hit in her career.

[56:04]Yup.

[56:04]Is this the Laurel Canyon sound?

[56:07]Have we discussed that at all?

[56:09]Yeah,

[56:10]I think definitely.

[56:11]I might,

[56:12]we might've discussed it two years ago.

[56:13]Yeah.

[56:14]Okay.

[56:14]There's,

[56:15]there's zero chance.

[56:16]There's any people who listened to episode three that are still listening.

[56:19]No chance.

[56:20]What's the Laurel Canyon sound.

[56:23]I heard.

[56:23]So I know it's kind of this laid back,

[56:26]you know,

[56:27]groove sort of lush sounds.

[56:29]And I don't honestly know.

[56:30]I think it's relates to an actual geographical place in Los Angeles,

[56:34]right?

[56:34]Yeah.

[56:35]Laurel Canyon.

[56:36]Yeah.

[56:36]Where all those guys live across.

[56:37]We still as national young.

[56:38]Right.

[56:39]The birds.

[56:40]Matt,

[56:42]would you say that was noodling or not?

[56:43]No,

[56:45]not,

[56:45]not,

[56:46]not too much.

[56:47]I mean,

[56:48]noodling is just going up and down,

[56:49]you know,

[56:51]like what fish does.

[56:53]I can't stand fish bunch of noodlers.

[56:55]Or it's that method of catching catfish with your fingers.

[57:00]Yeah.

[57:00]I was going to say,

[57:01]it sounds like something we do down on the Chattahoochee for sure.

[57:03]Like we're down there noodling like crazy.

[57:05]I think it can be a lot of different extremities that you can be putting in

[57:08]those little,

[57:09]it's true.

[57:09]Especially if you double it and then you can really,

[57:11]especially if they're augmented,

[57:12]right?

[57:12]Why is that guy so proud?

[57:20]Look at his face.

[57:20]He's like,

[57:21]ah,

[57:21]yes.

[57:22]I'm just in all the way.

[57:24]You know how sometimes I'm going to edit this out,

[57:27]but you know how sometimes you see somebody like just leaning against the

[57:29]pool and they're just relaxing and there's a big smile on their face.

[57:31]I picture me doing that,

[57:33]but I've got my dick in a noodling hole.

[57:35]There's some catfish just going down on it.

[57:37]I'm like,

[57:37]like,

[57:41]wow,

[57:41]that guy's really relaxing over there in the white cowboy hat and life jacket.

[57:44]I'm just like,

[57:45]he gets out of the pool.

[57:46]There's a fucking big catfish just hanging on.

[57:48]Oh my God.

[57:51]The catfish choked.

[57:52]To death.

[57:53]He's like,

[57:54]well,

[57:54]I promised to buy the catfish breakfast.

[57:55]I had to bring it with me.

[57:56]Like I said,

[57:57]brunch,

[57:58]brunch,

[57:58]brunch.

[57:59]Wait,

[58:01]I didn't order this more cinnamon roll.

[58:02]What's all this marshmallow sauce on here?

[58:04]What?

[58:05]All the way.

[58:07]A few weeks ago,

[58:08]Aaron had to work.

[58:09]Robbie said,

[58:10]he goes,

[58:10]you didn't need to make that joke.

[58:13]We understood what joke you were making.

[58:15]Aaron scolded Rob for like explaining a dirty joke.

[58:18]That didn't need to be explained.

[58:20]Taziki looked like cum.

[58:21]That was the joke.

[58:22]This is a song about that old Vikings quarterback,

[58:26]Freeman in Paris.

[58:28]There was probably a Morgan Freeman joke.

[58:34]A little pace to it,

[58:34]a little tempo.

[58:35]I love that.

[58:36]It's got a groove.

[58:37]I loved,

[58:39]loved,

[58:39]loved the first three fourths of this album.

[58:41]Yes.

[58:42]This is a fantastic song.

[58:45]I'm trying to figure out,

[58:47]she's,

[58:48]I mean,

[58:48]she's Canadian.

[58:49]Right.

[58:49]Yeah.

[58:49]There's this other band,

[58:50]Tragically Hip.

[58:52]And there's,

[58:52]you know,

[58:53]that we've talked about a few times that it's like universally,

[58:56]well,

[58:56]not universally country of Canada loves the Tragically Hip.

[59:00]And there's a few other bands like this,

[59:03]that it's like,

[59:04]they have this weird rhythm about how they produce their songs and write

[59:08]their songs.

[59:08]And I'm trying to figure out if it's Canadian because they talk just a

[59:12]little bit different.

[59:13]And so they've got this different rhythm or what it is,

[59:15]but like,

[59:15]she's got the same thing that the Tragically Hip have,

[59:18]where it's like,

[59:19]I know nobody else does these rhythms like this.

[59:22]And comes in and out and puts things together like that.

[59:25]I don't know.

[59:25]So I got to do a little deeper.

[59:27]I mean,

[59:28]Barenaked Ladies kind of does that too.

[59:30]I mean,

[59:30]they're like more pop,

[59:31]but they kind of do this like longer phrases and off kilter kind of.

[59:35]It sounds like we might need to do a Canadian Mount Rushmore.

[59:39]You know who would be on that Mount Rushmore?

[59:42]There should be more Rush on there.

[59:44]For sure.

[59:44]Not Drake.

[59:46]If you don't think that's,

[59:47]if you don't get that joke,

[59:48]get the fuck out of here.

[59:49]Oh,

[59:50]what a rush.

[59:52]But the song is about David Geffen.

[59:56]That is a good way to get your songs played,

[59:58]isn't it?

[59:58]When you write songs about the guys who are like running the studios or

[60:02]whatever.

[60:02]Yeah.

[60:02]I mean,

[60:03]it's brilliant.

[60:04]It's like,

[60:04]it's like,

[60:06]I met the most beautiful man in the world.

[60:09]He had a supersized dong,

[60:12]Jeff Bezos.

[60:13]You,

[60:14]I love you Jeff Bezos.

[60:16]Like you just get that song published.

[60:18]It'd be no big deal.

[60:18]I think it's cool that you're so cool.

[60:22]Suddenly jacked when you got rich.

[60:24]You're so muscular now.

[60:25]That's not weird at all.

[60:27]Okay.

[60:27]Nevermind.

[60:27]Jeff Bezos.

[60:28]Have you seen him before and after where now he's like super jacked.

[60:31]Right.

[60:31]It's probably got all the time in the world.

[60:34]It's.

[60:34]Oh yeah.

[60:35]That's what it is.

[60:36]Time.

[60:36]Love it.

[60:38]Drugs.

[60:38]Yeah.

[60:39]People.

[60:39]Aaron said the Aaron LLC.

[60:41]Enhancement.

[60:45]Aaron.

[60:45]Enhancement.

[60:46]He's got low T Aaron.

[60:48]He needs it.

[60:49]I love the guitar strumming on this.

[60:52]I spent a lot of time reading about guitar strumming and what a strum

[60:55]consisted of.

[60:56]We don't need to go into detail,

[60:58]but I just love the guitar on this one at the beginning.

[61:00]You don't want to go into just a little detail.

[61:03]Russell,

[61:03]but what a sperm is.

[61:04]I got deleted.

[61:05]Cause I got a different list coming later.

[61:07]Oh my God.

[61:08]So good.

[61:08]Same situation.

[61:12]So this is not the Aerosmith song.

[61:18]I was,

[61:21]I was fearing nudely.

[61:22]This felt a little doodling to me,

[61:24]but it does pick up steam in the second half.

[61:28]And she's an amazing singer, Aaron.

[61:32]I don't know if we've talked about her before,

[61:33]but like,

[61:34]what do you think of Joni Mitchell as a singer,

[61:36]what her vocal range and what she does vocally?

[61:38]I mean,

[61:39]100% unique.

[61:40]You can't sing along with her.

[61:42]No,

[61:43]you can't predict where she's going to go with her melodies.

[61:47]Yeah.

[61:47]Totally unique.

[61:48]You could,

[61:49]you could play any of her songs I've never heard before.

[61:52]And I could tell it's Joni Mitchell.

[61:53]Like it's that kind of voice.

[61:55]It's a Bob Dylan level.

[61:56]You know,

[61:58]guys like Bob Dylan.

[61:59]Who else?

[62:00]Like a Neil Young,

[62:01]a Neil Young,

[62:02]you know,

[62:03]as soon as you hear Neil Young,

[62:04]a Jacob Dylan.

[62:05]I mean,

[62:05]you know,

[62:06]there's just so many voices.

[62:07]I got an issue with apology about that.

[62:08]I last week or two weeks ago said that that wall flowers record sucks.

[62:12]It.

[62:12]What?

[62:13]Matt called me out on it.

[62:15]And it definitely does not suck.

[62:17]Matt sat up and looked at,

[62:18]he's looking at you at the camera.

[62:20]Like he can't believe he said that.

[62:21]But then the next day,

[62:22]you were like the first three out of four songs on that are bangers.

[62:25]I listened to the whole album and it fucking rocks.

[62:27]I was completely.

[62:28]Yeah.

[62:28]I was like,

[62:29]I thought it affected a better apology.

[62:31]A hundred percent.

[62:32]The Michigan apology.

[62:33]Yeah.

[62:33]I was absolutely wrong.

[62:34]That wall flowers record still rules.

[62:36]Now here's where this is going to get weird.

[62:38]I was thinking about what's this.

[62:41]Here's where it gets.

[62:45]Everyone pause.

[62:47]Now we're talking about our augmented wiener getting sucked.

[62:50]I'm just going to.

[62:52]Matt made that really real.

[62:56]Earlier it was fun.

[62:58]When Matt put it into actual terms, though, I don't want to deal with it.

[63:01]Made me feel weird in a tingly way.

[63:04]Here's the thing.

[63:07]I think we should do a no interrupting policy because I was just about to talk about stuff and you guys really interrupted me.

[63:12]I heard my feelings.

[63:15]It's rude.

[63:15]Oh, contraire, mon frere.

[63:19]Earlier we were talking about the Laurel Canyon sound and I had watched a documentary where they talked about it.

[63:24]And I'm like, God, what was the name of the documentary?

[63:26]It's not, I can't remember.

[63:27]And you know who directed it?

[63:29]Who produced it?

[63:30]Jacob Dillon.

[63:31]We talked about this on episode 23.

[63:34]Echo in the Canyon.

[63:35]And you know who one of the main guys who's there talking to them about the Laurel sound, Russell?

[63:40]Probably David Geffen.

[63:41]Nope.

[63:42]Beck.

[63:43]Beck did it.

[63:44]When you're talking about, watch Echo in the Canyon.

[63:47]Beck is front and center along with Fiona.

[63:49]Fiona Apple's there.

[63:50]I mean, it's just like this whole podcast is summed up.

[63:54]Plus they do that cool thing where they keep interviewing Brian Wilson and it makes you feel awkward after a while.

[63:58]Love it.

[63:58]It's my favorite thing.

[63:59]Okay.

[64:00]That's getting edited out because it's mean, but it's true.

[64:02]I'm going to say this right now.

[64:03]I was going to say.

[64:04]These Brian Wilson documentaries are elder abuse.

[64:07]It's just these people who want to make a documentary.

[64:09]They grab him.

[64:10]It's terrible.

[64:11]Okay.

[64:12]Now let's think funny things.

[64:14]Here we go.

[64:14]Ready?

[64:14]And remember my Josh Freeman joke earlier.

[64:17]Oregon Freeman.

[64:19]Car on a hill.

[64:20]Car on a hill.

[64:20]I knew, you know, in high school, I knew somebody named Karen Hill, but car on a hill.

[64:24]Please stop the podcast.

[64:27]I'm begging you.

[64:27]Let's not do this anymore.

[64:28]We've had enough problems with cars on hills in this between the four of us over the last six months, haven't we?

[64:33]Karen flushed all the drugs down the toilet.

[64:38]Oh, yeah, you're right.

[64:38]Hank Hill needed that, you know, after he got busted.

[64:42]I was reading that this song was about Jackson Brown cheated on her.

[64:46]Did you guys know that this was, that's what this is about?

[64:48]I didn't even know.

[64:48]No.

[64:49]But I didn't know they were together.

[64:50]Man.

[64:51]She was with everybody.

[64:53]We figured that out in the first episode.

[64:55]Yeah.

[64:55]So it turns out this is about Jackson Brown cheating on her.

[64:58]And I thought we could do a list tonight about the best songs ever that celebrate cheating.

[65:03]Celebrate?

[65:04]Or discuss cheating.

[65:06]All right.

[65:07]I thought we maybe had done this one before, but then I realized we did.

[65:13]We did the best songs about one night stands before.

[65:16]So this is different.

[65:17]All right.

[65:18]This is about cheating.

[65:19]Russell, I'm just going to say this.

[65:20]If you come home and your roommate is playing a song celebrating cheating, that's a red flag.

[65:24]Cheating is great.

[65:27]I love to cheat.

[65:28]It is great.

[65:29]You're like, wait, what is this song?

[65:30]I don't know.

[65:31]My roommate ate all the cinnamon rolls, so I ran out of it.

[65:34]Yeah.

[65:34]I'll tell him it was the Peloton.

[65:36]We've heard once before.

[65:37]Remember we did Marvin's Room by Drake.

[65:40]We did Amy Winehouse, You Know I'm No Good.

[65:42]We talked about Timberlake before.

[65:44]We've talked Taylor Swift.

[65:45]We've talked You Ought to Know by Alanis.

[65:47]So all these we've already discussed.

[65:49]I'm not on the list.

[65:50]Get them out.

[65:50]But the first one is I was going to do the Marvin Gaye version, but we were talking about Pee Wee's Big Adventure.

[65:56]And I believe Pee Wee at one point featured the California Raisins.

[65:59]So we're going to do the 1987 version of the California Raisins doing Heard It Through the Grapevine.

[66:05]This is about cheating.

[66:06]Am I right?

[66:07]Yeah.

[66:08]The best version of this song.

[66:10]No.

[66:11]Yep.

[66:13]That's what Aaron said.

[66:13]No.

[66:14]This was written by Norman Whitfield.

[66:19]Who wrote Papa was a Rolling Stone.

[66:20]Ain't too proud to beg.

[66:21]And just my imagination.

[66:23]Amazing songwriter.

[66:24]I don't know if you know more about him or not, but I was like, damn, that's a lot.

[66:28]That's a lineup.

[66:29]Yeah.

[66:30]He would have been one of the Motown, you know, hit makers.

[66:32]Right.

[66:32]I don't know much more about him, but that's incredible.

[66:36]I know.

[66:37]I have to say when we were listening to the California Raisins clip, I can picture the

[66:41]raisin that was singing that in my head.

[66:43]Yeah.

[66:43]I when I watch California Raisins, I used to be like, this is the fucking raisin.

[66:48]This is the fucking future.

[66:49]In the future, every show is going to be like the California Raisins, right?

[66:52]This is the yeah, is the craziest thing I've ever seen.

[66:54]And then to have celebrity deathmatch after that on MTV.

[66:57]I was like, I was fucking right.

[66:59]This is great.

[67:00]I love claymation.

[67:01]The lead singer from the California Raisins was a guy named Buddy Miles.

[67:04]He was also a member of a band that played a lot with Jimi Hendrix.

[67:08]So we listen to a lot of Jimi Hendrix stuff.

[67:10]This Buddy Miles was the lead singer for the California Raisins.

[67:13]That's wild.

[67:14]Yeah.

[67:15]He played drums in the band of gypsies.

[67:17]And then he had his.

[67:18]His own hit went down by the river.

[67:19]Back in the old days, we used to have Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs and Claymation.

[67:25]Yes.

[67:26]And now we've got no hope, no money, no cash and no jobs.

[67:31]And Clay Aiken.

[67:33]I didn't know Buddy Miles was.

[67:38]He was like the funk drummer for Jimi.

[67:41]I did not know he was a California Raisin.

[67:42]Aaron's trying so hard to get this back on the rails.

[67:44]Aaron, I love you.

[67:45]Next song on the list, Rob, I'm going to warn you.

[67:47]I know you've had problems.

[67:48]But the next song on the list is TLC from Crazy Sexy Cool 1995.

[67:53]It's Creep.

[67:54]Oh, can I just tell you this?

[67:56]Oh, it's so good.

[67:57]I got aroused when I opened your email.

[68:00]And that barely ever happens with you, Russell.

[68:03]My understanding is this essentially is like, hey, she found out that he's cheating.

[68:08]And so what do you do?

[68:10]What better way to get back at him?

[68:12]You go cheat yourself, right?

[68:14]What do you guys think?

[68:14]You get cheated on.

[68:16]You got to cheat back.

[68:17]Don't you guys think?

[68:17]No.

[68:18]You take the high ground.

[68:19]You let them hang out in the gutter.

[68:22]Yeah, make them beg.

[68:23]You take the high road, Russell.

[68:23]Make them beg.

[68:24]You know what, man?

[68:25]It's funny you say that.

[68:26]Put milk in a bowl and make them drink out of it, man.

[68:28]I agree with you.

[68:28]Is it Left Eye?

[68:29]Is one of the members?

[68:31]Lisa Left Eye Lopez.

[68:32]Lisa Left Eye Lopez actually said she was against the song when it came out, Matt,

[68:37]because she said you should take the higher road and you should just leave that relationship.

[68:41]She did not support cheating to get back at someone.

[68:44]So you were on the same boat.

[68:46]So what does she support?

[68:48]Rob?

[68:48]Well, so the rest of that quote.

[68:50]I think she supports setting fires in her house.

[68:51]God damn it, you guys.

[68:52]No interruption of Rob policy, guys.

[68:56]No interruption.

[68:57]Let's try it again, Matt.

[68:58]One more time.

[68:59]This is what happens when we have four guys who have all watched the same behind the music.

[69:03]We're like, what the hell?

[69:04]I don't know about Left Eye.

[69:05]We'll make a cut right here.

[69:07]Let's do it again.

[69:07]No, no, no.

[69:08]We're not doing it again.

[69:09]That was funny.

[69:09]That was funny as hell.

[69:10]So Rob, Rob, Rob, what does Lisa Left Eye Lopez support?

[69:13]Me f***ing off constantly watching that video.

[69:16]I literally.

[69:18]I literally got aroused when I read TLC Creep in the email.

[69:23]I was like, oh, a normal email from Russ.

[69:26]I definitely won't get aroused from this.

[69:27]This was 1995.

[69:30]That was the third most successful single.

[69:33]Yeah.

[69:34]Can you guys guess what the two more successful singles of 1995 were over Creep?

[69:39]It was Black Spite.

[69:41]It was by TLC or overall?

[69:43]There was one song ahead of it.

[69:45]So TLC had two of the top three.

[69:46]Waterfalls was number two.

[69:48]There was one other one.

[69:49]It was at Black Street.

[69:51]It was Coolio Gangsta's Paradise.

[69:53]So those were the top three singles of 1995.

[69:56]No, that's true.

[69:58]Can you imagine?

[69:59]God, I wish I was older then.

[70:01]Can you imagine losing, like just losing your virginity?

[70:04]And the songs on the radio are Creep, Gangsta's Paradise, and Waterfalls.

[70:11]I mean, erotic songs.

[70:13]You can imagine driving home too fast.

[70:16]I mean, isn't.

[70:18]Isn't Red Light special on that same album?

[70:21]I mean, that's the one you'd be getting it on to.

[70:24]Aaron, you know what happened in that movie, Gangsta's Paradise?

[70:26]It was Michelle Pfeiffer was, I think, hooking up with one of the students.

[70:30]The movie was called Dangerous Minds.

[70:32]Oh.

[70:32]That movie, Gangsta's Paradise.

[70:34]We've all watched the same chunk of MTV in our lives.

[70:38]That's it.

[70:39]Yeah.

[70:40]Yeah.

[70:41]So that song, Creep, was written by a guy named Dallas Austin, who also must have had

[70:48]a problem with cheaters or something, because he also wrote this next one.

[70:50]It's Blue Cantrell, Hit Em Up from 2001.

[70:53]You guys remember this one?

[70:54]Yes.

[70:54]Yeah.

[70:55]This is the best one.

[70:56]You know, I talked about Rock Marciano last week.

[71:01]Rock Marciano quotes Blue Cantrell on his new album, The Elf and Man's Bones.

[71:06]Time is a flat circle.

[71:08]I'm serious.

[71:09]Like, it's all coming together.

[71:10]And I was thinking about rapping this, because this is really about, like, retail revenge,

[71:15]right?

[71:15]This is, like, going and taking your guy or your...

[71:18]Your spouses, your partner's money, and going spending it all, right?

[71:21]Like, isn't that fin-doming, Rob?

[71:23]You're brunching, mate?

[71:24]Since that podcast has come out, I have met two fin-doms.

[71:28]Two?

[71:29]What?

[71:29]I've met two people who had good friends that were both fin-doms and would talk about it.

[71:33]I'm related to somebody who knew one, where eventually she had to tell the guys,

[71:38]please stop sending me money.

[71:39]What?

[71:40]Like, that's how much money she was getting.

[71:42]Can you imagine how anti-boner that would be if the one thing you're into is fin-doming?

[71:46]She's like, please, no more money.

[71:48]You'd be like, oh.

[71:48]I just went and got this enhancement on how you won't take and spend my money?

[71:52]It's like, well, I'm going to click unread on Russell's TLC creepy meal and open it up

[71:56]again.

[71:57]It's the only thing that gives me joy anymore.

[71:59]Wait, what?

[72:01]Next song on the list about the greatest cheating songs ever.

[72:06]It is Shaggy with Rick Rock, It Wasn't Me.

[72:08]It Wasn't Me.

[72:09]The King.

[72:10]This is it.

[72:14]This?

[72:15]Wow.

[72:16]Now, Russell, I assume this is the question.

[72:17]Is this the question you're going to ask with this?

[72:19]What's that?

[72:20]Do you have an opinion about banging on the bathroom floor?

[72:23]I always thought that was a gross idea.

[72:25]Imagine you're down there, right?

[72:27]And again, this is what you do.

[72:29]Rob's face is in the Zoom camera right now.

[72:34]Oh, by the way, I want to mention during Creep, Aaron was doing the Creep dance and it made

[72:37]me laugh so hard.

[72:38]I can't not do the Creep dance.

[72:40]And you're getting bone butt naked on the bathroom floor and you look over and you see

[72:44]like under the toilet.

[72:45]Like, have you ever laid down on your bathroom floor?

[72:47]You look just under the toilet.

[72:48]I can tell you right now, not erotic.

[72:51]Not as erotic as noodling.

[72:58]Yeah, I always imagined that this took place in like a mansion type house where the bathroom

[73:03]was big enough to like be on the floor.

[73:04]No one's ever used the bathroom.

[73:07]No one's ever used the toilet, right?

[73:09]This is for banging on the bathroom floor only.

[73:11]Yeah.

[73:11]That's better because I pictured it was one of those bathrooms where you need to keep

[73:15]it.

[73:15]They call me Mr. Bombastic.

[73:16]Oh.

[73:17]I'm sorry, Rob.

[73:17]You broke the interruption rule.

[73:19]I apologize.

[73:19]You must be on mute.

[73:23]Aaron was on mute a few weeks ago.

[73:25]You might be on mute this week.

[73:26]I don't know how you guys don't quit the podcast after I do this to you.

[73:30]I picture it was like a bathroom that you have to get a key from in the gas station.

[73:36]And that's the bathroom floor.

[73:39]The worst part about that is like how, like you, you, you go, you get the key and then

[73:45]you go into the bathroom, then you wash your hands and then you have to touch the key again.

[73:47]Like, I don't know if the key is the dirtiest thing about the whole transaction.

[73:51]Or the real, the real rundown bathrooms where it's like a shared towel or just kind of like

[73:55]floats like it goes up and around.

[73:56]Like, how long is this towel?

[73:58]Yeah.

[74:00]That's what you're using afterwards.

[74:02]You use just the towel that comes out.

[74:03]My favorite thing about that one from a cheating perspective, like we've talked about, we were

[74:09]talking earlier about like, do you cheat to get back at them or what do you do?

[74:12]And this one, he just denies it, right?

[74:14]He's like, it wasn't me.

[74:15]Like he's caught red handed.

[74:17]He just says.

[74:17]It wasn't me.

[74:18]What do you guys think of that strategy?

[74:20]Just deny.

[74:22]It's, it's, it's what works, right?

[74:26]You have to keep the lie up.

[74:27]You have to keep going.

[74:28]Once you dig in, that's it.

[74:30]And no, I didn't eat the cake mix.

[74:31]This has nothing to do with that.

[74:33]Okay.

[74:33]It's not.

[74:34]So I think this song was actually a big comeback for Shaggy.

[74:37]He got dropped by his record label in 1997.

[74:40]And then all of a sudden he was doing nothing for like three, four years.

[74:44]And then this song got him back up on the charts.

[74:46]He made it to number one for two.

[74:47]And it was the biggest selling single in 2001 in the UK where the queen

[74:53]Elizabeth was just a bunch of blokes.

[74:57]And you know, what's, you know, what's weird.

[74:59]You know, where they found the queen Elizabeth.

[75:00]Where?

[75:01]But naked on the bathroom floor.

[75:03]She was splooted.

[75:07]She wanted to cool down.

[75:08]She wanted to cool those Royal jewels.

[75:11]In 2019 NPR called blue Cantrell hit him up the second time.

[75:17]70th greatest song by a female artist of the 21st century stating before

[75:22]Carrie Underwood, Maroon five and Timberlake blue Cantrell wrote the script

[75:25]on cheater revenge fantasies.

[75:28]But one of those cheater revenge fantasies to me is gotta be Carrie Underwood

[75:32]2007.

[75:33]This is before he cheats.

[75:34]Check this one out.

[75:35]I don't know this.

[75:36]You don't know this.

[75:38]Are you serious?

[75:39]What the fuck?

[75:47]Come on, guys.

[75:48]This is a huge song, Aaron.

[75:50]You gotta back me up.

[75:51]I don't know.

[75:52]I don't know this one.

[75:53]I don't know.

[75:54]Sometimes I miss stuff.

[75:55]It's good.

[75:56]In part of that song, she mentioned something called bathroom polo,

[76:00]which is vending machine cologne.

[76:01]Would you guys ever buy a vending machine cologne or no?

[76:04]When you're trying to pick between the Spanish fly and the vending machine

[76:09]cologne, it's such a tough decision.

[76:10]A Spanish fly does make me super horny.

[76:15]Hmm.

[76:15]Is that what a Spanish fly does?

[76:17]I think it's supposed to.

[76:20]Yeah, it's an aphrodisiac, right?

[76:22]I've never tried it, but I've taken so much.

[76:25]I think it's affected me permanently.

[76:27]That's all I think about.

[76:29]So Carrie Underwood, Aaron, I think she's a famous country artist

[76:33]that might have been on American Idol.

[76:35]She was on American Idol.

[76:36]I know her.

[76:36]I just didn't know the song, man, but she almost passed on that song

[76:39]because she thought she would get backlash.

[76:41]But I thought that was a very famous song.

[76:43]But maybe this is where Aaron and I diverge.

[76:45]That song is a huge hit, man.

[76:47]Pile on Aaron right now.

[76:49]Make fun of him for that song.

[76:50]No, I like Aaron.

[76:51]I choose to just respect the fact that he's got other tastes in music.

[76:55]He knows so many more artists than I do.

[76:58]And the fact that he doesn't know Carrie Underwood's song,

[77:02]what is it, Before He Cheats?

[77:04]Oh, no.

[77:05]It was the first country song to become a double platinum digital single.

[77:09]Before He Cheats?

[77:10]You know, he didn't know Party in the USA.

[77:12]That was more shocking than this one.

[77:14]Wrecking Ball.

[77:15]Wrecking Ball.

[77:16]Wrecking Ball.

[77:16]That's the one.

[77:17]But either way, if people are going to cheat,

[77:20]these are the songs you better celebrate it with.

[77:22]Russell, I need to tell you something.

[77:25]Yeah.

[77:25]Earlier today, before we started recording.

[77:28]You need to do another podcast.

[77:30]I had a friend do a podcast, and I heard another list.

[77:33]So, it turns out that this is only the second best cheating list ever today.

[77:37]Did you at least listen to it on the bathroom floor?

[77:40]Oh, God.

[77:41]It wasn't him.

[77:41]It wasn't Rob.

[77:42]Yeah.

[77:43]It wasn't me.

[77:44]It's so gross.

[77:45]So gross.

[77:46]And then when you get one of those,

[77:47]one of those clawfoot tubs.

[77:48]I mean, the bathroom floor then.

[77:49]Forget about it.

[77:50]Disgusting.

[77:50]This is going to shock you guys.

[77:52]There's a surprising number of cheating songs that are country.

[77:56]There's a lot.

[77:57]Yeah.

[77:58]I had to get rid of Thunder Rolls by Garth Brooks.

[78:01]Too hard to get a Garth YouTube clip.

[78:03]How about Who's Bed of Your Boots Been Under by Shania Twain?

[78:06]That's a good one.

[78:07]You're Cheating Heart by Hank Williams.

[78:09]Kerosene, Randall Lambert.

[78:12]I was going to do more country, but Rolling Stone doesn't like country music.

[78:15]So, I figured we can't talk about it.

[78:17]That's true.

[78:18]We can only talk about bands that are New York bands.

[78:21]What about that band that all they talked about was cheating?

[78:23]Cheat Trick.

[78:24]I want you to want me.

[78:28]Sorry.

[78:29]So much editing for me.

[78:31]Next up is Down to You.

[78:34]It's about a one-night stand.

[78:35]This is what won Best Arrangement for Grammy.

[78:39]Beautiful song.

[78:42]They look so high.

[78:43]You brush against a stranger and you both apologize.

[78:46]Felt like a poem.

[78:47]Not a song to me.

[78:48]It is so poetic.

[78:50]It's like the line about Mad and Target.

[78:53]Brush against a stranger and you both apologize.

[78:55]I think it's like Minnesota was a hope.

[78:59]Russell, at the end of this song, I heard she mentions a hobgoblin.

[79:04]So, I thought maybe this was a fairy tale.

[79:06]No, you should.

[79:07]There might not be a fairy tale, but I just want you guys to listen to this part of it.

[79:10]I heard two very distinct songs that I think have come directly from this song.

[79:15]Rob, just play the end of this.

[79:17]I'm going to tell you two songs I want to hear if you guys hear it, too.

[79:19]It's switched on.

[79:20]God damn it, Rob.

[79:21]I'm sorry.

[79:22]It's three in the morning Eastern.

[79:24]Let it go for a little bit.

[79:31]It's not around.

[79:34]Oh, gosh.

[79:37]I just got that.

[79:38]It's not around.

[79:40]Sounds like some musical theater.

[79:44]Sounds like musical theater.

[79:45]If you do Peter and the Wolf here,

[79:47]it's going to blow my mind.

[79:48]Is it Wicked?

[79:49]No.

[79:49]I heard Walking in Memphis.

[79:52]Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[79:54]And I also heard Night Swimming.

[79:56]If you guys rewind that, that sounds exact.

[79:58]There's no way REM didn't rip that right from this song.

[80:01]And I hear Dashboard Light, too.

[80:03]Yes, exactly.

[80:04]Play it one more time.

[80:06]Just one more time.

[80:07]I want to hear Night Swimming.

[80:08]I do Bear Big Ten.

[80:15]There you go.

[80:16]Right?

[80:16]Yeah.

[80:17]influential yeah absolutely night swimming which is a top 10 song of all time great song

[80:26]such a great song also known as rob's family tradition of skinny dipping they call it night

[80:32]swimming did not do it this year we didn't do what what i like to call night noodling

[80:36]this is like the balloon bit but a little different oh it's so good

[80:56]we started out this episode with the balloon bit

[80:59]i thought that was last week no just like this train

[81:05]it's an hour and a half

[81:06]26 minutes ago i i put this is where this album starts to fall off for me there's a huge tone

[81:11]change right here listen what is this it's the csy stuff right yeah but it's where it gets weird

[81:21]am i wrong i mean am i do i am i too harsh on the in this album listen to this raise down a robbery

[81:28]whoa this felt like a wayla jennings song to me you got like the wah-wah guitar

[81:36]and

[81:36]i heard wayla jennings on this one it's a little stevie influencer i think

[81:41]guys this is not like this one you didn't like this one no no it was way out of whack with the

[81:48]rest of the album and i enjoyed it wait wasn't you talking about sports gambling yeah he's this

[81:53]is about a prostitute who's meeting a guy in a bar who's betting uh the twins to win the al central

[81:58]this is wayla jennings go listen to some wayla jennings that sounds exactly like i think it's

[82:04]nice

[82:06]problem child

[82:07]not to be confused with the hit movie problem child

[82:12]starring john ritter who died i don't think he died by a car accident so i've got no jokes

[82:22]that phone's not gonna ring i have to go to the bathroom too so that phone's not gonna ring

[82:27]all right and finally we get look at rob twisted in his seat

[82:35]the absolute

[82:36]weirdest ending to an album we have ever had more than nirvana more than this was the jazz one

[82:44]this is the weirdest fucking song this is a song called twisted where joni mitchell you know who

[82:49]she used to date chich maron jackson brown chich maron oh so she invited to make an appearance

[82:57]in 74 chich and chong if i if i asked you right now bet a million dollars is chich and chong on

[83:04]any joni mitchell album you would easily say no and think you're going to win money and you would

[83:09]lose because here they are yep this is what i'm talking about bad jazz all because there was no

[83:20]driver on the top drugs are bad one of a kind one of a kind here yeah

[83:25]my analyst told me that i could not make it through this album i couldn't do it i think

[83:32]that it's you instead because yeah this is the kind of vocal jazz that i often complain about at

[83:37]home like when stuff like this comes i mean i love joni mitchell so i don't want to say anything bad

[83:41]about it but when stuff like this that is not joni mitchell comes on the radio i'd change it

[83:45]do you think there's any song that wouldn't be made better with chich and chong talking

[83:54]in the background i don't think so right shaggy it wasn't me oh oh oh my god creep imagine if

[84:02]you're listening like if you're listening yeah rob rob is rob's putting his taking his headphones

[84:06]out in the basement all of a sudden what is that song creepy step in there instead of his mom

[84:11]walking down his chich and chong what is that hallelujah by what's his name i don't think

[84:18]oh yeah hey man you get it you like heard you heard a chord hey man

[84:25]who took all the baloney

[84:32]and i don't want to i don't want to bring this up i don't want to bring this up but i used to

[84:37]have a primus album i had a song called hamburger train and at the beginning of that song there was

[84:44]a clip from a chich and chong movie that starred peewee herman saying you're the man from the

[84:51]hamburger train right to the guy from the hamburger train right there's this huge bass solo i'm playing

[85:00]it right now

[85:02]this whole thing is the matrix we're in the matrix we're in the simulation

[85:06]we've reached the extent everything is looping back in on itself

[85:11]this is like the end of 2001 i'm going forward

[85:14]at the post game show tonight or not oh my god earnest we i forgot we fucking talk about earnest

[85:20]he went to camp he went to jail that was like a very even a lot of places in his life

[85:26]rob was making nash bridges jokes three weeks ago and here we are

[85:30]what

[85:30]yeah

[85:32]what i didn't get is on netflix i watched earnest goes noodling

[85:36]it was you know what i mean verne hey this feels good when the fish sucks me off you know what i

[85:42]mean verne oh god this is what you're telling me you don't need to do that you don't need to do

[85:48]that part we are it's too you don't have to explain it it's like it's out there already

[85:54]hey rob no edits on this episode post as is post it right i mean i've heard of getting i've heard

[86:01]slapped by a fish but slobbed by a fish i mean oh no oh my god are we getting the rating system

[86:08]now now we're just feeding it more bait like rob would be feeding that catfish

[86:12]all right so we are into our rating system guys court and spark this is

[86:20]110 like the famous highway referenced apparently 10 days ago from how long this podcast has seemed

[86:26]to last uh is this album at 110 is this perfect okay i would say yes i would say yes i would say

[86:31]you know what it's and because it's right in the middle it's not court it's not spark it's and it's

[86:37]perfect it's rolling well toned is this album should this have been higher maybe 109 maybe

[86:44]108 and i know what you're saying wait he said higher but the number nine or 108 somewhere right

[86:49]but it's yeah wait what somewhere somewhere what's happening or the floor above

[86:57]007 that's still a great joke that is yeah it is i

[87:01]don't get what's going on i feel like you're in solar power guy where he's like i

[87:05]i have to keep talking to you because i'm technically gonna get a sale out of this

[87:11]i ate the dates or the figs or whatever these things are called

[87:17]i also like to play desperately looking around the yard

[87:21]oh yeah uh turns his head sideways so he can read on the net spike ball

[87:26]and listen if this is

[87:31]if this is like spike ball okay and it should be better okay it should be higher up on the

[87:36]list in the lower number and before i was rudely interrupted i was telling you that it's higher up

[87:42]lower number what's going on with that okay that's the way this podcast works as the night goes on we

[87:48]actually get higher and higher and our listeners get lower and lower we can easily get one more

[87:52]in tonight we can easily get one more in that would be a rolling bone it should have been

[87:57]higher up on the list a lower number as i previously explained if you didn't understand what that meant

[88:01]go back 15 seconds i explained it if you didn't understand that go back push the podcast back

[88:05]but in a minute i explained it back then too um or is this a rolling groan okay you did not like

[88:14]this album it should be up higher than 110 maybe 111 maybe 112 okay uh eventually it might have

[88:21]been off the list uh maybe you didn't like this album at all that would be in necessity it would

[88:26]you would have to give it um a rolling groan a roll

[88:31]too much you know what too much cheech not enough chong if you thought that this would be a rolling

[88:37]groan okay i love tommy chong hate cheech marin and by the way but but you could augment that

[88:42]if you needed more chong you could augment that right you can do double assessment if i wake my

[88:49]wife up laughing she comes out and say what are you laughing so hard at and i say man says that i

[88:55]should augment my chong i might the big d i think

[89:00]it's it's this is the big d oh my god okay at least at least she might she might have to be

[89:07]listening to one of these cheating songs if she's she can't handle it anymore right that was weird

[89:12]because our first dance at her wedding was it wasn't me i thought that was i was suspicious

[89:16]of that red flag for sure so what do you think rolling well-toned rolling bone or rolling going

[89:19]russell i'm into songs about cheating i think the piano on this the piano on this was fantastic i

[89:29]like joni mitchell she like erin

[89:30]was saying earlier she's one of a kind vocally rob you said that i think earlier you hear and

[89:35]you know immediately that's joni mitchell for me it's i don't think it's something i'll come back

[89:39]and listen to numerous times and i to be honest rob brought up the cheech and chong at the end of

[89:45]the song i never made it through the album and to me if i couldn't make it through the album then to

[89:49]me it can't be one that i'm going to come back to over and over so i'm going to say a slight rolling

[89:54]rolling groan it's too high on the list for me but joni mitchell's an icon super influential i think

[90:00]but the album's not for me matt what do you think rolling well-toned rolling bone or rolling grown

[90:05]i think it's rolling grown i think joni mitchell is one of the quintessential artists especially

[90:12]the 70s late 60s 70s but i don't think this album deserves uh to be 109 on the top 500 albums of all

[90:22]time so i'm just gonna say it's rolling groaned she would live in an apartment above james bond

[90:28]but two units over that's true

[90:30]you know what we should maybe make a shirt of this drawing

[90:34]but it might only be one unit over because maybe all the odds are on one side and all the evens are

[90:41]on the other so it's probably right next to be quarter units too involved it would get real weird

[90:45]you guys sound like you're kind of into real estate with that kind of talk i don't know that's

[90:48]a weird better it sounds like we've been hanging out with cheech and chong for the afternoon

[90:52]aaron rolling well-toned not enough tone or rolling grown now listen this album is like a salesman

[91:00]to your house are you going to look you make eye contact are you going to get up and answer the door

[91:07]or will you simply turn back to the peewee herman video that you've also started watching 10 times

[91:11]in a row what will you do aaron rolling well-toned rolling bone or rolling grown court and spark

[91:15]yeah i'm gonna answer the door 1970 1974 i'm usually not a laurel canyon sound person it's

[91:24]just it doesn't really move me i don't feel like it's it's propulsive enough but i like the grooves

[91:30]on this record i like the the kind of lush sound and love what joni mitchell does with phrasing i

[91:36]will acknowledge there's a miss or two on the album but i'm going to give it a rolling well-toned

[91:41]uh propulsive i mean that's that's how i feel about doing this night noodling

[91:47]i have a very propulsive i'm doing it propulsively

[91:53]i see you've doubled down on the fish fucking jokes

[91:58]so that's

[92:00]excuse me excuse me i want to be clear about something

[92:02]he's baiting the fish is blowing me

[92:05]it's a blowfish

[92:08]they're all blowfish if we work hard enough listen next up oh by the way you guys are wrong

[92:16]okay and i have to go so i've got to hurry no no messing around no wasting time please

[92:21]this is a rolling actually i could be talking about the album or the podcast this is a rolling

[92:27]veering widely in tone

[92:28]okay

[92:29]i like an album where it's a it's a they try to do it's like a fiona apple they do a certain thing

[92:35]and they do the best of it i just thought this one was all over the place love the first half

[92:38]i if you cut this album off after seven it would be one of my favorites that back half i i'm with

[92:43]russell i couldn't get through it it was tough but next up guys what will happen next week okay

[92:49]or maybe tonight if we just want to hang out and do more of this you could get through one more

[92:53]this morning we have an album that's perfect for russell matt but especially taylor made for

[92:59]aaron oh because they're nasty boys nasty boys you nasty boys we've got janet jackson

[93:08]with what let me do a dirty control yeah we've got janet jackson with control janet

[93:16]you know and this was actually 110 so i was i was off of it so it is two doors down

[93:25]another corner unit

[93:29]guys mrs jackson is my i've got the perfect mom you can call me janet if you're nasty

[93:36]beck did it better

[93:38]turn it up a little please

[93:44]what do you like to do for fun uh oh check this one out

[93:51]oh peewee that catfish is back in the land watch when he's done blowing up just watch his face

[93:59]there's a chance this could be our last episode it might be a great way to go out in style but

[94:07]this could be it watch his face

[94:10]now wouldn't it be better if he got in the balloon would you guys agree no

[94:19]damn it that's your biggest flaw rob the nicest thing anyone's ever said

[94:29]oh god his face is so good

[94:31]watch all the people in the background start flocking i can't believe we're gonna spend

[94:38]seven minutes of this reporting on this

[94:40]this is rolling i'm gonna i'm gonna pause and save my recording because i don't want to lose it

[94:48]so i will say russell this is a rolling peewee hormone

[94:53]so matt you and your kids are just dying to this whenever you're just i mean literally just

[95:02]watching it and then he gets to this and it's just rolling by the end of it when you see it

[95:07]you don't know that it's coming it's hilarious it's very funny hold on look at his face

[95:23]see man if you can get your boys to watch the vikings game you can watch this for three hours

[95:30]by yourself tomorrow night that's crazy he's playing jingle bells with a balloon

[95:35]he's very animated too

[95:41]this is one take or not oh yeah no he so he yeah he's been doing this bit for years

[95:51]he does this bit yeah

[95:53]hey you just imagine they're cheering for us

[96:00]any chance magic mike gave us a standing ovation at the end of this episode or not

[96:05]oh for sure 100 all right i'm stopping recording it's time to say goodbye