John Prine: John Prine (1971) w/ Jon
[00:00]Hey everybody, this is Rob, producer Rob, editor Rob. So this is a different character than on the show, Rob. I just wanted to stop in and say a couple of things because the timeline on this episode actually gets a little confusing. We had our buddy John from College Days and John Prine Expert talk to us. And it turned out that John had made a parody song to start the episode. And I, of course, never checked the email. So I didn't see the parody song, which I felt terrible about. So we ended up actually recording our reaction to the parody song afterwards. Now I have edited it into the episode and it is a seamless edit. So you probably won't notice any difference whatsoever, but it might be just a little confusing, but I wanted to point that out. Again, appreciate all the listeners out there and really appreciate everybody who's been leaving voicemails, et cetera. Please enjoy this episode with our good buddy, John from Edina, who once again became famous because he listened to every episode. He listened to 101. 40 episodes in 30 weeks,
[01:01]which is not recommended by many doctors. All right, so enjoy the show. And I won't talk to you later because I'm, well, unless you know me, then I'm a person. Then we will talk, hopefully. All right, bye. Ed, oh, wait a minute. I forgot my gong already. Oh my God. Ed, 2020, four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums as decided by Rolling Stone Magazine. This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music, excoriated the order, and led us to making this podcast. We are far from experts. We promise to do almost no research. All opinions are our own, unless you disagree. Please sit back and enjoy. Beck did it better. We are all the way up to album 149. I love Popsicle. Is that close? No, Popsicles. Yes, I nailed it. 149, I thought of at night. For the final 140, I nailed it. Who doesn't love Popsicles? I'm a genius. I don't care what areyouagenius.com says. I am a genius. It's one more than seagulls.
[02:00]You know what kind of Popsicles I love? I love seagulls. Some of the Popsicles I did not like back in the day were like when you'd go to someone's house and they had like the homemade ones, like those plastic, you know, those form things where like parents would pour like Kool-Aid and shit. And they're like, they couldn't even buy the real Popsicles out of the box. They had to like pour it in these molds and freeze them. That was the worst. Can I just take a moment right now to make a little PSA? Everyone buying gifts for people with kids. Guess what? We ain't making homemade Popsicles, okay? Stop buying us that shit. Stop buying us homemade Popsicle kits. We're not, guess what? I will shell out the three bucks. We can just buy it. We can just buy Popsicles, okay? Popsicles are not going to put us under. Like we will be fine. What I don't have is a bunch of room for your Popsicle shit that I use about once and then I forget about and toss it. So no more homemade Popsicle shit. And your kids don't want them anyway because you say, oh, we got those Popsicles in the freezer. And they say, no, I want the one from the gas station. Like that's always what happens, right? What about Snoopy snow cones? Come on, Snoopy? Wait, what's a snow cone? Who's Snoopy? Snoopy. Now you're thinking of, you're thinking of in New York, what they have is they have, they have two very ones that my kids get, both of which come out terribly disfigured
[03:02]to what they're supposed to look like. And that is Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which never looks any good. And then SpongeBob. And they have some sort of like black, like I don't know if it's the Junior Mint or something that's supposed to be his eyes. It's never in the right place. It's always hideous. It's terrifying to get, okay? It's a disaster. Oh, and guess what? Oh, are we buying, did I buy two cones at a car the other day? A truck that sold cones? And Jenny turns to me and goes, I need $24. $24? You need $24? For two cones? That's $40 a cone. $40. Plus you gotta tip the ice cream guy, don't you, Rob? I'm not sure the math is right here. Was that a Rolling Stones t-shirt? What the hell? What the hell, Rob? This isn't right. Get this guy out of here. No, we don't have time yet. We don't have time. We haven't done introductions. This is 1971. This is the eponymous, John Prine. It's John Prine by John Prine. And guys, today, I'm happy to announce, we do have a special guest. Look at the size of this pineapple truly that I bought
[04:00]just for this recording. The special guest will be this pineapple truly. Everybody's excited about it. Except for my wife. So I've heard. From nobody, actually. Nobody's ever like, wow, that was good. Thank you for that. I like that part. That was my favorite part of Father's Day. Anyway. Can't make that joke with my kid walking behind me. We have a surprise co-host today. He's already my first favorite co-host of the whole podcast. You can tell he's getting dumber and dumber because he listened to all of our episodes. John, how fast did you listen to those episodes? It was end of September until two weeks ago. Oh, my God. Nine straight days. Thanks for the math, Matt. I was a math major. Took him a school year, about 30 weeks to listen to about 140 episodes. I'm so impressed.
[05:00]Just go back right now and just listen to the Bob Dylan Highway 61 episode. It'll make your brain melt. Now imagine doing a couple of those a week. He is here. Everybody say hello to John for me. John, how are you doing today? Hey, John. I'm doing fantastic. Is this my rolling going? No, God. Haven't you listened to any of the shows? This is Suzanne part two. This is when she said she was a huge fan and had no clue what was going on. Suzanne is not a huge fan. I got news for you. She's been on twice. She's been on twice. She's been on twice. She's been on twice. She's been on twice. She's been on twice. She's been on twice. She's been on twice. She's not a huge fan. I don't even think she's listened to those two episodes, honestly. What? Those are two good episodes. Listen to another song on the dial. John, what would you say we're going to hear on this next radio station? Well, there's a song about our host, near and dear to the problems that you've been facing, and it meshes very well with John Prine's storytelling abilities. And it's just a song about the trials and tribulations of cohabitating with a spouse. Now, can I just say, first of all, the number of songs about cohabitating with people, it's through the roof right now.
[06:00]Everybody's talking about it. It's high. It's high. It's high. It's high. It's high. It's high. It's higher than some of us are comfortable with. Can I just say, can I just say, thank you for finally recognizing that I have problems that people need to be thinking about. Everybody's like, oh, Rob doesn't have problems. His life is obviously perfect. Actually, no, I have a lot of problems. And the problem is people don't like me or the things I say. It's a big problem, okay? So thank you for acknowledging that. John, introduce this song for us. Well, since this is episode 149 with John Prine, he's got a great song, Spanish Pipe Dream. It's a song about meeting a stripper and running off to Canada to beat the draft and basically burning your TV and eating peaches, blah, blah, blah. It fit perfectly well with everything that you've described in the first 148 episodes of the struggles of a spouse going to bed before you or the kids waking you up. There's a solution here. And I think, Rob, I think you nailed it on the head, which I think you need your own bedroom. Was a level-headed doctor
[07:01]from east of Redwood Falls but she had trouble sleeping because of Rob's big balls and he pressed his balls against her sent a few dick pics Rob is a wreck but he's better than back cause he found Rob has a TV and a PlayStation and his own bed with gents of dishes while Rob's on the pot sleeps soundly and sleeps with a white noise
[08:03]fan he's in the eastern time zone while Aaron lives out west ain't a polyamorous date we know that Beck did it best Rob has a TV and a PlayStation in his own bedroom Jen sleeps alone she did all the dishes Rob's on the podcast now Jen sleeps soundly This is incredible. This is so good. That's it. That was it. Woo! I mean that's That was That was absolutely That's so good. Incredible. That was That's so good. The tuna can he really does listen Rob. Yeah he's listening all the time. No it was the part where I forgot the candles where I was like I had like a flashback. I was like
[09:00]God. That's so good. I had forgotten I had done that. That was one of the best episodes that whole scenario I was like with you pushing the shopping cart as it fell out and just advising you like Rob that's so good. the candles fell onto the floor. I I and unfortunately I think what I did during her birthday is edit edit a podcast which is for some reason infuriated her can't imagine why that would be but I will say this so strange I know I do have strong feelings about this I think sleeping separately Jenny and I got a hotel room the other day because her parents were visiting we got a hotel room with two queen-size beds I said I'm going to sleep in a different bed than you and she was mad at me for that do you guys think it's appropriate for me to say let's sleep in separate beds in a hotel room with two queen-size beds when it's just the two of us what would you guys do? it's a great idea don't be perverted don't be perverted Russell okay I think you set up one bed is a sleeping bed and one bed is the sex bed
[10:00]you referenced it to the last episode you put a towel down to avoid the wet spot but have the separate beds and you don't have to worry about it and then it's up to you Rob you're like I'll sit in the wet spot right right if you make like if you make a wet spot big enough to take up an entire bed number one kudos and number two then you fall on the sword you sleep in the whole wet spot and she gets her own bed it really is in my head what's happening here this is my this is my job for me Dinah come on now we've got a conversation between these three bozos about the wet spot on a bed like Rob has like a yogurt truck exploded on the freeway God it's it's more like there's a slight leak in the yogurt truck oh oh like it's missing some yogurt I remember there's been more yogurt before happy Father's Day everybody listen
[11:00]this is Beck Did It Better I've got four guys here who are upset because they just actually I've got four other guys I've got five total and they're we're all upset because we just invested in 10,000 flag decals okay that's that's we're not getting that anymore that's not gonna happen I thought I'd make it that's not me I got a flag but it was blue and white and it said on it it was a green message like it's a lot of people didn't understand like who would get this exactly who's where's the crossover here but Matt has a bunch of up around his house Matt how are you doing Matt in Minneapolis how are you doing today I'm doing good Rob all I want to know is how the hell can a person listen to this podcast take us seriously and come back week after week I mean who the hell keeps listening to this podcast yeah yeah it's not us we're getting closer and closer to say no thanks to this I've got Russell in Minnesota Russell how are you doing guys if you see me tonight with an illegal smile it's because I still have most of my DVDs and they'll last a long while
[12:00]won't you please tell my co-tenant I didn't kill anyone no I'm just trying to have me some DVD fun well done wow hot dog bun when Russell's being so vociferous saying this stuff he is also looking around with his eyes he's like looking side to side to make sure nobody hears what he says it might be true even now the reporter is asking you to rice rice rice rice rice rice But just pleased to be here. And John, if you notice, we haven't invited any of those people back because they weren't funny enough. So you better pick up your game. Okay. So far, I've heard zero funny jokes. Nothing about jacking off.
[13:00]Think about changing that. It gets a lot of laughs, actually. Rob, I got a question for you. We've done a lot of cooking here. I'm confused. What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? Oh, no. Wow. I've never heard a garbanzo bean on my face. Yes. I've got Aaron out in California. Now, Aaron was just telling us earlier, have you heard about the population increase that's going on in Ireland right now? Yeah, it's news to me. Yeah, it's Dublin. I've got Aaron. Aaron, how are you doing? Hey, well, when I was a young girl, I had me a cowboy. Let's talk about John Pratt. Oh, now that's erotic. Okay, that's what I'm talking about. I love erotic stuff. We are recording this on Father's Day, so I don't know if that's extra cool or extra sad, but we're here. All of both. All of both. We told our kids to leave us alone, just like we do every Father's Day, and nobody listens. Now, I don't know about your Father's Day, how it went, but I only got in a fight with one of my kids, so I'm pretty happy about that. I only have one kid. I think that's, hey, new record.
[14:00]Two out of three ain't bad, right? Yeah. Two out of three. Hey, hitting 500, I'd be in the Hall of Fame. Let's get into the voicemail. We asked them to leave messages on a voicemail line. By the way, we badly need voicemails. Please. But they're not so... Wait, again? I don't understand. We go from like 100 to zero so fast. It's... They leave text messages. Inventory mismanagement. Ah! Do these idiots not realize we only do audio? Our listeners are moronic. We're giving John the full song here. Oh, it's a pain. Rob, I gotta ask, before we get to the voicemail, how did you feel having John on during the parody song? Proud. Because sometimes you've been nervous about that before. No, this one I was proud of. Because it's not easy. You fucking nailed it. It's not easy to do a John Prine song, I'll tell you.
[15:00]It's complicated. All right, let's get into this voicemail. It's short and sweet. Hey gang, first time, long time here. Just wondering, now that it's summertime, what your favorite summertime jams are? With the caveat that name of the song cannot have summer or anything that implies summer. Summer in the title. For me, my go-to is Feel Me Flow from Naughty By Nature. Oh, that's such a good one. Let's see, let's see. I thought about this for all of two hours and I couldn't come up with anything as good as Feel Me Flow. How'd you get two hours? I just heard the question now. Oh, right. It's a total surprise to me. Right? The little keyboard at the top of the... This is a good one. Guys, it's summer. What does summer mean to you? You know what summer means to me, guys. Actually, school's done. I got Jack to do. This is why I have multiple songs for tonight. Oh, God, this is good. But you know what summer means to me?
[16:00]I'm never tying my shoes again all summer. I'm wearing Crocs. I'm wearing Crocs all summer and I couldn't care less. Taking my kid to the beach tomorrow. It's going to be a great day. You going to have Naughty By Nature playing while you're going to the beach or not? Can you have a kid and her friends over and then be playing Naughty By Nature? That feels wrong to me. You can play Feel Me Flow, I think. I can't play OPP, but Feel Me Flow should be... Hip Hop Array is fine. Actually, yeah, Naughty By Nature is surprisingly kid-friendly now that I think about it. Yeah, I have to be like, well, those are actually other people's privates, so that's a whole different... You want to keep your hands off of those. Yeah. So what song do you guys have that's summer that is for summer? Let's make a little summer playlist that is summer but does not have summer in the title nor implies it. I don't even get what that means. So I guess, like, School's Out Forever, you can't do that or... Can I go first? Yeah, Russell, let's hear it. I don't know if this has got summertime in the lyrics or not, but I think the artist that defines summer music... I'm going to go country. I know the caller who left that voicemail doesn't like country,
[17:01]but I'm going to go Kenny Chesney. The song is Get Along. Wait, wait, wait. There's a flag that says no shoes right there. See? I mean, this is like a... I guarantee they play this at tailgating before a football game right at the end of the summer, right? Yes. Yeah, that's nice. The country song that came to mind for me was the fried chicken... Chicken Fried by Zach... Is that Zach Brown? Zach Brown band. Yeah, that's the one that came to mind for me. That's the country song that came to mind for me. Wait, Chicken Fried? Chicken Fried. A little bit of Chicken Fried. It's probably not really a summer song. Go here on a Friday night. You guys know what I'm talking about. Their jeans a bit just right. These guys know what I'm talking about. In the radio hall. I don't know, maybe it's not a summer song, though. Well, it has to be a summer song. You like this one for summer? Absolutely. It's hard to fry chicken in the summer unless you've got like... Norma, for me, Diana, you've got to be like the most country one of us for me. Have you stuck with your... I mean, you grew up in the sticks in Wisconsin.
[18:02]You've got to be the most country one out of all of us, right? Absolutely. Are you still stick with the country? 100%. I've actually... Country's not country enough for me anymore. It's now bluegrass, so... Yeah, you've gone all the way. I'm going full on in. Nice. I like to hear that. A little bit of Chicken Fried. Chicken Fried. That was his whole beer on Friday night. Well, who's the bluegrass? Who's the bluegrass? I'm sidetracking it quick, but I'm interested in who's the bluegrass that we're listening to. The greatest bluegrass musician out there right now is Sam Bush. He's getting a little old, and behind him coming in is Chris Thiele, who's taken over for Garrison Keillor, whatever that show used to be called. That's Nickel Creek. Great bluegrass. Oh, I remember you watching. I remember you going to Nickel... You've followed Nickel Creek for a long time. Yeah, that's education. That's right. I will say this. If you guys... I'm saying it again. If you want to get into bluegrass, I think a great place to go is Will a Circle Be Unbroken box set.
[19:00]It's a great history of bluegrass. Everybody loves it. And then there's also this great song called... Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. John just gave us his song, and you're making your own bluegrass song. Oh, I didn't know. Is that... No, no, John didn't give us his summer jam yet. All right. He didn't give us his summer jam yet. Let me give you my summer jam, which kind of threw me off. The rule of... Of not having a summer piece, because obviously I went to Joe Ciatriani's summer song, which obviously breaks the rules. Yep. Apparently, Schools Out is not with the rules. That was going to be my big pick, but I'd have to go with Otis Redding, Doctor of the Bay, because what do we do all summer here in the great Midwest? We go sit at the lake, right? Yes. And he wrote that song right out here in the bay in Sausalito. He wrote that song sitting in Sausalito. Wow. Aaron, go on mute for a second. Yeah, I'm muted. We might not... We might not need Aaron anymore. John's got music coming for us. Yeah. Hey, we can just record Central Time and East Coast Time for the next few years. Oh, my God. Think about how early we can start recording.
[20:02]Here's the thing. We got to see what John does for a rolling gong, and if it's something where you roll your eyes and go, who is into that shit, then we'll know that we've got the new and improved Aaron. Such a relaxing song. Perfect, perfect. On Central Time. Oh, it's so good. Russell? Hey, you're supposed to be muted. You're supposed to be muted, Aaron. Oh, right, yeah. We didn't tell you to come back yet, and we're not going to. Aaron, you can listen to us make fun of you. Just don't talk to us anymore. Yeah. Aaron's getting so hard. Hey, Aaron, I got your back, buddy. Go back, go back. Oh, yeah, hey. Come on back. Aaron, what happened to Otis Redding? Why isn't he around anymore? Oh, don't make... Come on, don't make me do this. I'm just wondering. Well, he died in a plane crash and landed in a lake. That is so weird. No, don't. What? Oh, no. Already? Wow. If he can do it to Amelia Earhart, he can do it to Otis. Oh, no. Hello. Hello. Hey, baby, it's me. It's the Big Papa, baby. And I'm here for my greatest song of the summer, baby. Do you know what it is? Do you want to take one guess what you think it is?
[21:01]It's the one song we know of yours. No, we had that other song the other time where we found out it wasn't that good. Oh, baby, you know what I like. This is the song of the summer. It's the song of the summer. This is the summer jam right here. Because you know what I love to do all summer, baby. Number one, I spread COVID misinformation via Twitter, baby. Oh, no. What? Oh, no. Uh-oh, I've been told I'm too loud. Oh, no. Oh, I'm sorry. I was doing the Big Bopper. It's a big hit. So why do you think this is a great summer jam, Bopper? Listen, nothing says summer like calling people on the phone, okay? Or getting called on the phone. Is that what's happening in this song? And then talking about laces? I guess I don't understand what the song is about. Baby. No one's quite sure. Big Baba has to be quiet, baby. People in the house are sleeping. And people, they're bad. Big Bopper right now. Which is so sad. To be mad at Big Bopper on Father's Day. Oh, how could you do that to me, baby? Father's Day. I only have an hour left to play my Father's Day cards.
[22:01]Oh, baby. Anyway. Here, you're doing it with us. I died just like Otis Redding in a plane crash. Goodbye, baby. Oh, yeah. Listen, I'm not going to lie. When I'm trying to think of a funny joke to end that, and my wife is out yelling at me for being too loud, it's rather distracting. Okay? I can imagine. I can imagine. I've got the dog on a leash with one hand. I'm trying to type with the other hand. Kids are walking around. The wife is coming out yelling at me. It's tough. I'm ready for the summer to start. John, what is your song of the summer? It is Otis Redding, Doc of the Bay. Oh, did you know this? Yeah, it was. I got thrown off the podcast because his picture was so good. But now I'm confused. I didn't hear that. You're feeding that dog some panties, some Chantilly Lace, and we sit here on the podcast? Chantilly Lace, put it in that dog's face. Listen, I wish that was the dog's biggest problem right now because now what the dog is having with the dog is that he has now developed an itchy skin. So he smells like nooch. He smells like nooch like crazy. So I think of Aaron all the time now. Yeah, I'm glad.
[23:01]You probably feel good thinking of me. That's great. The dog smells like nutritional yeast. It is absolutely disgusting. Who hasn't gone with their song of the summer? Because I've got mine. I think Matt. Yeah, it took a while to think of. It kind of made me more themes. And so I think of Sublime as like summer music. That's a good one. Caress Me Down by Sublime. Wow. I didn't know she had the G.I. Joe Kung Fu grip. This one definition, Winamp, it really whips the llama's ass. This had to be on your Winamp player in the late 90s, early 2000s. You know, and what our caller had. It takes a while with the... Yeah. Oh, no. This whole album. Oh, Ron Jeremy? References? Come on. Yeah, this is very dated. You know, the caller brought up, Oh, good point. I think I've got Craig Mack, Flavor in Your Ear would be another one that just plays on repeat. Otherwise, I only listen to country in the summer anymore.
[24:02]I don't know. Like, it just kind of feels like when you're at the cabin or whatever. It's about the only time I can listen to it. Throw it out on a boat or on a pontoon. It's the perfect match. That's about it. But I go back to Sublime most. That's so good. If you will. Can I get in one? Can I get in one extra? Because I jumped out on Russell's. Go ahead, Rob. You want a mulligan? I need it. But not a mulligan. I just... I was riffing on Russell's. Go ahead, Rob. Aaron, let's hear it. Because I do think the summertime, you got to... It's a little bit of a different mindset. Because now you're not just playing for music yourself in your car while you question why you live in the place where you live. You have to pick music now that everyone in your family is going to enjoy. That's tough. You know what I mean? Like, I don't need my mom being like, who's Ron Jeremy? Like, I don't need to explain to her what's going on there. Fair. Or like, the real awkward part is when you're listening to that in the car with your mom, Rob, and she's like, man, that's a funny line about Ron Jeremy. Oh, no. The fact your mom knows Ron Jeremy is amazing. Yes. I thought so much because, like, my summers were so defined, at least in the early 2000s,
[25:01]by KDWB. So I was thinking about, like, 50 Cent with Hate It or Love It. But honestly, the first thing that came to my mind was Ja Rule and Jennifer Lopez. Like, the I'm Real remix with Ja Rule on there. Like, that's a summer... That's an absolute summer jam with Jennifer Lopez. Like, J-Lo in the summer with Ja Rule. Like, that was ruling the airwaves for at least three years. Are you serious? Yes. No, no, no. This is a summer jam? This is a summer jam. They're as old as a golden girl? What do you mean by that? We talked about this before. You were going to date a golden girl. You were going to either date J-Lo or Blanche because they were both 53 years old. Room for you. I think I'll date J-Lo. Really going out on a limb there, Rob. Do you think old people just looked older back then? Is that what's happening? Like, when we get older, are we going to be more J-Lo than Blanche? Rob, who would you do? Blanche or Mona? Oh, Mona. Mona is...
[26:00]Mona. Mona is one Everest that I would like to mount. Yes. It doesn't work, but I got... There's something there. You give Rob one new audience member and it just turns the game up just like that much more. Plus, Mona's wealthy enough to have a former pro baseball player be her housekeeper. That's true. Yeah, she's got it like that. I thought it was Angela. It was like the rich... Oh, maybe I'm wrong. Mona was just a little... Mona was her mom. Yeah. But Mona lived... Yeah. I watched a lot of that show with the sound off, so I'm not sure. I wasn't quite sure what was happening there. I like the idea, though, that Alyssa Milano's on a show and I'm like... Oh, no. Oh, Mona. Oh, do you think I'm looking at Judith Light? Rob, were you watching that show with your summer jam on, which was? My summer jam, of course, which is... And this is a song that I played all last summer. I'm in the boat. I am listening to this. This... You put this song on. It says summer to me. It is a straight-up bop. It is Meghan Trainor with Me Too.
[27:01]Whoa, I don't know this one. It's a drag queen classic. Oh, I'm excited. Okay, nice slinky bass line. I like it. You don't know this song, Rosie? No, I don't know this one. It's so good, Rosie. It's about how great she is. Just listen to these lyrics. It's so good. I want to hear Matt do it. That sexy thing, I see you over there. Yes. That's me. Oh, standing in the mirror. What's that icy thing hanging around my neck? That's gold. Show me some respect. I'll tell you what. Ooh. Yes, I know the words to this song, everybody. I do love that, man. Our listeners are going to love this. Now, was I going to say my summer jam is strawberry and throw everybody off a little bit? No, I was not going to say that. I didn't think of it until now, and I regret that. But I love a song where you're just hyping yourself up. I think that's one of the greatest things. It's a funky bass line. You get to dance. Now, she does talk about looking at herself in the mirror, and that is something I have been trying to avoid a ton.
[28:02]Wait, for real? Rob, when I think about summertime and I hear this song, all I can picture is you Speedo shopping in New York City and going into the dressing room and trying on your Speedos. Having a moon landing or two? All it took was one, unfortunately, timed picture that somebody took, and I will not be wearing that Speedo anymore. What? Okay. I'm so disappointed to hear that. I can put up with a lot of stuff on my body, except for some coloration issues. I'm like, hmm, can't see that. Like, when I'm bending over and it looks like it's some sort of weird coral. Like, nobody. Was this off at the lake? Damn. Where was this? Where did this picture take place? Of course, this was in Europe, where exactly zero other people wore Speedos. It was just me. Oh, and you thought wrong. You thought everyone would be wearing Speedos over in Europe. Yeah, and I knew it was bad because Jacques Cousteau came out and goes, damn, that's the craziest thing I've ever seen. Like, Zootaloo. What are they wearing for?
[29:00]Don't the dudes wear tiny swim trunks over there? They're wearing, like, literally long board shorts. Like, they are wearing, like, what I... Oh, no. It would have been more like if they were wearing, like, suits and, like, a t-shirt going in the water. It would have been like, goddamn, I should have grown up in Europe. This is my jam over here. All right. So, there is our list of some just... Never mind. Anything. That is our summer list of summer jams. Let's get into rolling going. Rolling going. It's, it's, it's, it's time to see what everybody's up to. It's time for rolling going. John, be our guest. Do the first rolling going. What you got? Son of a gun. Be our guest. Thanks, Gaston. I fucked up at the beginning because this is intimidating. I can understand why everyone tries to just go right into rolling going because I was so excited and prepared for it. But now it's time for it. Guys. And also, just be aware. This is the only part of the podcast people actually listen to.
[30:01]So, this is where you really got to sell it because the podcast, the best part is actually right at the end of the album before the rating system. That's where the funniest jokes are usually told. We do appreciate you coming on to talk about John Prine. We do appreciate that. Yes. Yes, very much so. I don't know if we've said that. I can't wait to hear his takes on John Prine. Well, here, here's my rolling going, boys. I have been reborn. I have never felt better. I went and got a sleep study and was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea. Wow. That could be kind of scary though, right? Well, so, so... So, typical people have five episodes a night. Episode being, you know, you stop breathing or whatever happens. I was recorded with 91. 91 episodes. Damn. Wait a minute. You don't breathe. Correct. 91 times a night. Now, I know... Yes. It woke you up 91 times. Is that what that means? Yes. Like, you choked yourself 91 times? No, it did. For those of you sitting at home right now, I know what you're thinking. Oh, John has sleep apnea. He must be a big fat guy with curly dark hair.
[31:01]Mustache. No. He's not. No, he's a slim blonde guy. Dude, he lives it. He died it. He's not allowed to look like that there, Rob. So, I just want to say this. This is another win for all the fat guys out there who do not have sleep apnea. Now, the skinny guy in the podcast has it. Now, I haven't gone to a doctor technically, so I'm not sure if I have it, but I'm going to be convinced that I don't. It's not diagnosed, right? It's not diagnosed. So, John, I would think the hardest part of the sleep study would be literally going to sleep in a lab. Without checking off. Because I'm not... Well... I'm not going to lie to you. There's only one way I can really go to sleep at night. And I don't think... They'd be like, God, these... I know what you're thinking. Why is our Wi-Fi so slow and these brain things are off the chart? Makes no sense. So, John, what was it like going to sleep in a weird lab? You jack off with a hoodie on. It's creepier. The good news was his insurance declined the in-lab. So, they sent me home with a bunch of shit I had to hook up to myself. And I slept with that. They wouldn't even check you.
[32:00]No. Well, it... So, John, hold on. Time out. John, you... You spent all this time in high school doing all of these, you know, things to get into a good college. You go to an excellent college. Harvard of the Midwest. One of the best. Yeah, right? It's not the best. You decide you're going to major in Norwegian for some goddamn reason. That's helt fantastisk, ja. Vad ska vi snakka om? Exactly. And then you go and you get this great job. And I think you're moving all over the country a little bit. Now you live in Edina. Right. You did all of that just to have your fucking insurance. Yes. Decline you... It's fucked up. ...in lab sleep study. That's fucking... You know what, though? Fast forward to the end. It doesn't fucking matter because if I was in the lab or in my home, I still had 91 fucking episodes, which are like CPAP. I got the CPAP. You got it. Nice. Oh, you guys. I don't nap anymore because I don't need to. I wake up and jump out of bed at six in the morning. I used to sleep until like eight because I was just so...
[33:00]Wait. John, you're not like a CPAP salesman here. You're not a CPAP salesman. You're not a CPAP salesman. You're not a CPAP salesman. You didn't come out here to pitch a product, did you? I don't have any commissions to earn anything from the CPAPs, but I'll tell you what. The first night I hooked up to that, it was like an avatar when Jake Sully hooked up to his creature with, you know, the things. It was super erotic. And you're just like a new person. It hooked on and I fell asleep and I woke up the next morning reborn. So, PSA, go check out your sleep. Interesting. It's important, man. It's important. We're getting older. At what point did you realize, like, oh, I should probably go do a sleep study? Like, did you have somebody in your life being like, hey, just by the way, I heard you a couple of times and I thought you were dying because you stopped breathing. I've had multiple feedback, of course. Nice. Multiple feedback on your sleep. Yeah. It's important to get feedback from different people, John. There's a lot of ladies that he died are willing to give feedback on those types of things. So, my wife's been telling me for years, you got a problem.
[34:01]She's like, fuck you. Just sleep through it. Right? You're like, whatever. I completely ignore it. But, you know, I go on a couple of guys trips for golfing and fishing and every time, every one of them are like, dude, you stopped breathing last night. In fact, we videoed it and then they'd show me. I'm like, whoa, that's scary. Whoa. And so, then I was like, well, and then I had to come back with my tail between my legs. I'm like, honey, you're right. I'm going to go see a sleep specialist for it. She's like, I told you, but that's the best thing. Honey, I've been saying it for years, but three guys that I see about twice a year, told me I better go do something. So, I'm going to immediately go to the hospital. Hey, I'm much too busy. I'm much too busy to go see your parents this weekend. I need to go get this checked out now. Hey, Rob, if you were to go on a trip with John and he were to go into sleep like that, would you set it up to look like auto-aerotic asphyxiation instead? Like, have a little bit more like credibility or excitement with it or not? Well, see, that's why I'm wondering, what's it like to J-O with a CPAP machine? I mean, like the extra oxygen. Wait, when did we say J-O?
[35:00]Is that what you just say now? Oh, yeah. I got the David Carradine model. It's amazing. Cuts off the air right at the right time. Kung fu grip. So, now, John, how do you sleep? Are you a back sleeper or how do you sleep with a mask on? That would be my thing. I don't know if I could do it. It's just a little apparatus that kind of comes in here, a little rubber thing. Oh, no. Do you look like a dying old person, John? Are you sleeping like a dying old person where you have that nose thing? Wait, is this sort of like Dune? Maybe you look like Dune. It is. Yeah. You're the Mawadib? It works. I don't care how it looks. It just feels great. And it was really kind of weird. I was at a tournament for my kids and I saw a guy, one of those motorized rascals, who had oxygen to like just be there. And he had the same apparatus on. I was like, well, I know he must feel amazing. But it works for you. If it works for you. So, when you go on these tournaments, do you take this all over with you every night
[36:00]and use it and haul it in your suitcase? I've got a travel case for it. And it works. It goes just like Rob's phone, his toy, his backpack. Yeah. I take it everywhere. So, now, pardon me if this is too personal, but if you and your lady go to bed together and have a nice time, how long do you wait to then put the CPAP on after? Once I know it's not going to happen, then I can put the CPAP on. It's crystal clear. It's black and white. I know exactly. I kind of want to... But it doesn't... It doesn't fall off your face. Like, when you tumble around, it, like, doesn't get yanked out or anything like that. Because... Like I said, Avatar, man. It's part of me now. It's there. My bedtime routine is officially messed up. I have a night guard. And as soon as that mouth guard goes in my mouth, it puts me to sleep. Nice. I'm like... It's like a signal to my body of, like, it is nighttime. I have also now started wearing noise...
[37:00]Or headphones. They're not noise canceling. But they're a headphone band. And it goes over my eyes. And I listen to a podcast. Guys, it takes me, like, 10 minutes to set up. To go to bed. It's messed up. Like, everything in my life I've made too complicated. I don't know. And now I got to... I got to have something for my nose now? Oh, my God. This is going to be great. I can't wait to add another thing. I do remember, Rob, in Vegas, you've had to, like, warn people a few times about your sound machine and all that type of stuff. And your whole routine in Vegas. So, it is pretty intricate, isn't it? It is. And you can't... But, you know, is there anything more important when you're our age than sleep? Like, is there anything you think about more? Or, like... Number one. Like, literally, I would say it's about 50% of what my wife and I talk about. It's like, when are we going to sleep? When are we waking up? How much sleep are we getting? How do we feel about the sleep? Like, all that stuff. We finally got our air conditioner fixed in our bedroom. And so, now we can close the shades again. The blackout curtains. So, I ran into something again. Oh, my God. It's so great. I love being in a dark room sleeping. A CPAP. Maybe that's what I need. It feels good because we're only about 10 years away from only talking about our poops. So, like, if we're talking about our sleep now, like, that feels better.
[38:00]Because, like, pretty soon it's going to be just talking about our poops. Like, thank God this podcast will be done by then. I'm going to save time. I'm going to combine those two things. Oh, no. You know what I mean? Hey, the CPAP machine filled me up. So, John, if you do have to get up, like, in the middle of the night, you had a beer too many earlier in the night, you got to jump up. You don't wake up anymore? Or do you wake up? Do you wear the CPAP machine to the bathroom and come back? How does it work? It's pretty slick. It's got a quick release right at the top. Oh, nice. Just pop it off. Oh, man. Amazing. Yeah. Game changer. Technology. Good for you, man. Honestly, props to you for taking care of your health. Like, that's awesome. That's amazing. Well, I did tell the doctor it was the first time I've been to one since my 18-year-old college entrance exam physical. So, I had that going for me. You want to give him some more props, Aaron? Yeah. Yeah. No, no. I'm good. I'm good. God, I might have to go try that. I'm actually sleeping great. But I am sleeping in a lot.
[39:00]Like, I try to get nine to ten hours now. Nine to ten hours. Good for you. We had a side text chain. Are you in bed nine to ten hours, or do you feel like you're asleep nine to ten hours? I go to bed really late, and I sleep in really late. Like, I'm at the point now where I'm waking up on the weekends, like, every day, ten o'clock. What? That's my weekend. Summer of Rob. Yeah, it is. Well, the kids sleep till one. I mean, and then Jenny goes to sleep at night at, like, 830. So, like, almost everybody's sleeping around the house. But I did take a nap today for two hours on Father's Day, so I don't know. But it was that nap where you start at 5 p.m. So, you're like, dangerous. Is that a nap, or is that you went and had too many mimosas and drag brunch, and you had a nap after that? Because there's a difference. No, it was definitely not a, oh, I have to get away from my family. Let's go sit in the bedroom type nap. And then I eventually fall asleep. So, rolling going. Rosie, how's it going with you? Man, it's going great. Listen, guys, I think you're aware I've had a super fucking rock and roll week.
[40:03]So, I got to give number one. I got to give a shout to Anna and Wallace, because I got invited to do some very cool stuff all week, and I went to those things. I had another thing that we were supposed to do together. I had to go by myself. Would any of this include the podcast that we scheduled for Friday? Yeah, I'm going to get to that. I'm going to get to that. I got to give a shout to you guys, because you were kind to reschedule the podcast we were supposed to. Take the listeners behind the curtain a little bit. We are recording on Sunday night. Because we were supposed to record on Friday night, and I asked for a reschedule. So, I got to, like, thank you guys for rescheduling for me. So, I don't know. Do you want to start with Friday night, or do you want me to run down my week? What do you want to do? Let's run. Start from. Let's go chronologically. Yeah. Chronologically, Tuesday night. As you guys know, I have been loving the Oakland A's since 2010 when we moved here. Now, I'm not, like, I've come to realize over the last couple weeks, like, the people who I know who grew up here who say, like,
[41:03]I used to have my childhood birthday parties at the Coliseum. Like, those people are really going through some stuff. But I love the A's. And the A's recently announced they're moving to Las Vegas. So, Tuesday night was the reverse boycott. So, of course, I was there for the reverse boycott, which was actually just a really special night. Like, the vibes were positive. The A's beat the Rays, who are the best team in the American League. They beat them 2-1. It was just, like, a cool, fun night. I had decent tickets. I was there with some guys who grew up here. So, I heard a lot about their childhood experiences at the Coliseum. Go ahead, Matt. So, the reverse, what was it called? Reverse the what? The reverse boycott. Reverse boycott thing, right? Okay. So, was the point of the reverse boycott to show ownership? Like, look, we can sell this place out? Or was it to bring back nostalgia for the people that grew up in Oakland and are part of the A's? Because all I see is that the ownership is just like, hell, yeah.
[42:01]We're moving, and they're bringing us, you know, like, 40,000 people and buying all this stuff. Like, this is, like, win-win for us. So, I'm trying to figure out. This is like dumping somebody, and they come over and do your laundry. No, it was fun, though, because actually, what's funny is the A's donated. Hey, Rob, that got a little personal. This first few days in a new place hasn't gone very well. But I'm hoping the laundry service continues. So, if you could edit that out. Excuse me, that's not how I fold my shirts. The A's ended up donating the gate receipts from that game to the food bank, which turned great. Okay. It's like, turned out great. No, the point of it was, let's show, because this was in the planning from about six weeks ago. The idea was, pick a random Tuesday night in June against an opponent that, like, typically you wouldn't care about. But it turns out the Rays are actually really good this year. And say, like, hey, look, we can still fill this place, even though it's not the Yankees, the Red Sox on a Friday night or whatever. So, like, we're going to show them, like, it's not about the fans not wanting to be here. It's because you have done nothing to show you want to be.
[43:01]Here, you've torn down the roster five times, even in my tenure as an A's fan. I mean, I've seen four different roster turnovers of playoff teams. So, Tuesday night was amazing. Hey, is Brad Pitt still the GM? Yeah, I didn't see him there. I mean, I don't know. Jonas Hill still crunching numbers back there. I mean, they must be. I haven't heard otherwise. So, that was Tuesday night. Tuesday night was incredible. And then on Tuesday, as I'm on my way to the game, my friend texts me and he was like, hey, what are you doing Friday night? And I was like, well, I'm doing my podcast. And he's like, well, I have A's tickets. And I was like, well, I'm on my way to the A's right now. Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. I'm doing Rob's podcast. Did you really say that you were doing the podcast? Yeah, hell yeah, I did. I told him. I was like, no, I can't. I've got to. Did he ask you follow-up questions about the podcast? Yeah. Did he know what you were talking about? Well, he's a friend of mine. He knows about the podcast. He's never listened, but he's a friend. Has he ever asked for the name of it? No. No. Yeah, there you go.
[44:00]Humiliated. And John, just get ready. You're going to see this, John. You try. You try to tell us, talk to somebody about the podcast, and you're going to see why we don't do it anymore. It's absolutely humiliating. You know what we need? We need a reverse boycott of this podcast. Yes. Everybody who's been boycotting this podcast, just come out. Okay, show the ownership that, yeah, you will listen. Show them. We will donate everything we make from this podcast to the food bank as well. We will donate all the money. Thank you. Then he's telling me, like, hey, you should come on Friday. I've got good seats. Okay, you know. But in the meantime, I'm also, on Wednesday night, I have tickets to go to SF Jazz to see, and I wouldn't have, like, I've got to give Russell credit for this. I would not have bought this ticket if Russell hadn't done a list about the greatest women drummers. So Cindy Blackman, if you guys remember, was on Russell's list, was playing here at SF Jazz, and it was Cindy Blackman. She was playing with John Madesky on the organ, Vernon Reed from Living Color on guitar. Oh, I love that show. In Living Color.
[45:01]Yep. Be what you want to be. In Living Color. And J-Lo was a fly girl. It's a full circle. Right? Jaco Pestorius' kid was playing bass. I cannot remember his name now, unfortunately. And then it also was saying. His name was Algo Jr. Algo Jr. Pestorius. And then every flyer said, and special guest, and very special guest. So you guys know Cindy Blackman's married to Santana. So it's like, Carlos is going to show up for sure. We do know that, Aaron. We do know that. So I was like, Santana's going to show up for sure. How many innings did Johan pitch? Was it like? My story's confused. My story's confused. Man, he always went seven and a third minimum, right? Like he was like seven and a third to eight and a third every time. Like one earned run. If you were here for the reverse boycott, and you don't understand why a Johan Santana joke was funny there, you're actually not part of our core audience that we're going for. We're going for Minnesota males age 40 to 42. Maybe that's part of the problem.
[46:00]We got one here on the, as a guest host. That's exactly it. So I had tickets for Wednesday night. My wife was supposed to go with me. It was going to be our first date. And I don't even know how long with like, we had, I had the babysitter lined up. Like I got the, our neighbor to babysit. And then my son got sick. So I had to go to the show by myself. But Carlos Santana did show up and play two tunes with Cindy Blackman's band. It rocked. It was amazing. I was in a small auditorium. Like they played great. Santana was incredible. Where's Rob? Thomas. Where's Rob Thomas? I was in row K. I was in row K and like row A is on the floor, man. I was in it. It was amazing. Well, how would you like, I went to a jazz fest that night and the special guest was Rob Thomas. It was a real bummer. I feel like I got the short end of the stick. So this was your first concert back here. And you were saying first concert in, I mean, since before the pandemic. Yeah. So it treated you well. It was great, man. Like, I think people should go hear live music. I feel like that's a good thing.
[47:00]I did. So like I bought her vinyl LP at the concert. It was great. You guys want me to keep going or should we, should we go to somebody else? Special. You didn't even get to the, you didn't even get to Friday. I'm here Friday night, man. Yeah. So Thursday night, Thursday night. I mean, honestly, the question, the answer is let's go to somebody else, but yeah, let's finish your story. Like let's hear this Thursday night, regular night, Friday night. I go to the A's game and my buddy owns a bar and the tickets were from a liquor distributor and. Oh, that means they're good. Front row, the front row behind home plate, like sitting as close as you could at a high school game. And so we drive in and we like, we drive down and we go to this parking lot. We're like, you know, my, my buddy's like, well, I got the parking pass. And I'm like, no, no, no. You got to go to the next gate. So we drive in, we're in the VIP parking lot, but you got to understand this is the Oakland Coliseum now. So the owner definitely not going to show up. We drive into the VIP lot. You have to turn your car off.
[48:00]Open the trunk. A cop comes and does a metal detector all around the car. Then you get to go in and park. We park in this lot where there's, I don't know, 12 spots open. And then there were also four spots that were reserved for the owner, but they were reserved using cones that said owner yellow cones that said owner in green letters. But one of these cones said owner, but the E was missing. And then like we go in. Through the VIP entrance. So you go in and like, it was the Phillies in town. So you go in, you walk right past, like you have to walk in, you get a wristband, you go in this entrance. Like we, we walk right past the Phillies visiting locker room. So I saw Kristen Pache, like getting dressed for the game. We go down the steps. A guy is coming up. You saw him in the locker room. Yes. You could see into the locker room. I did not see any dongs, but I looked for you, Rob. You saw a guy coming up the steps, carrying a tray of something. He's wearing him fully. He's like full Phillies uniform.
[49:01]It turns out he's the Phillies starting third baseman at Edmund. So it sounds like you walk right by us. Then we go in, we go sit down. It was unlimited drinks, unlimited food all night long. I had a, I had a pulled pork sandwich with a pineapple slaw. I had a Korean beef tacos with kimchi on them. They had old fashions, Modelo's. I drank like it was incredible. I had such a good night. Who got that money, right? I didn't pay for any of it. I mean, you know who got that money? John Fisher got that money. His owner got that money. Yeah. He's like, Oh good. Another two cones. I can buy it from my parking spot. I got to thank you guys for being flexible with the timing because I did. I got to sit as close as you could to an M to an MLB game. Well, Rosie, go ahead, John. My question for you. Did you get to catch up with your good buddy Kurt Schilling and just solve all the world's problems together? Cause I know you guys, you guys are like two peas in a pod tight like this. I would love to talk with him. Right? Like so strange.
[50:00]I didn't. You know, I didn't like he wasn't there to get together. No, he wasn't there. I've got one more little bonus. Go ahead. One more thing. Real quick, real quick, Rosie. When I hear these situations, there's a few people you have in your life where you're like, Ooh, this person was in this situation. This is what he would have done. I have John for me dying as one of those people like, right. Something happens, something pops up and you say, Oh, John for me dying. He would have done that. I have to think. And I was hoping that he would have done that. You were going to go with the story, but with the cones, did you guys attempt to steal one of the owner's cones? And we talked about it. We talked about it. Did you? Cause John would have tried to do it. We, we took a, we took a photo of two of the guys flipping the cones off. That's as far as we got. We didn't have the guts to go back. Like John, that's like in his DNA that they would have been taken there. There would have been no question about it. Right. John, we talked about it right away when we parked. We were like, we got to get those.
[51:00]Go drive back past that watermelon on the road by the airport, all the way to the Coliseum and get those fucking cones and put it. They're yours. We messed up. Yeah, we should have did it. But that's the problem, John, with having kids, isn't it? Cause your kids will do something like steal a cone from somewhere and you have to be like, this is very bad. You shouldn't be doing this. And then you have to be like, don't, don't hear about me growing up. I was actually much worse. Like, like I have one kid who's like, their room is just full of like soda cans. And I'm like, I get it. I want to know. What can you do? It's a pain in the ass to throw them away. I totally get it. It makes sense. That's a great call, Matt. We totally should have, we talked about it. We didn't do it, but we did. It was crazy. We got to talk, like we talked to a player during the game. Like there was a replay and we talked to Seth Brown about how he had gotten picked off in the first inning. We're like, what'd you say to the pitcher after you got picked off? He's like, I told him I wasn't going anywhere anyway. Like it was incredible. And then one quick bonus yesterday was my wife's company's family event concert at Oracle park. So I saw,
[52:00]I chanced the rapper and Dua Lipa yesterday. So I had like, and now I'm talking to you guys. Like what the hell is Aaron's privilege corner of the week here? It's incredible. I just like, I'm running with baseball games, free concerts, and I'm now I'm talking to you guys. So that's it. It couldn't be any better. So I'll be like, I just imagine how much work Aaron's getting done. Like imagine how much he's getting done at work. Just Jack and shit getting done there. Hey, did you wear your, did you wear your Marlins gear in honor of Lawrence Levy? Or did you? Because you had some pretty sweet seats, right? And you were right behind home plate. Right. No, I was wearing the green t-shirt that said sell on the front, but then I went back and looked at the broadcast. I didn't see if I was on there or not. I don't know if I made it, but I was wearing the full sell t-shirt, but anyway, I've taken up way too much. You guys have time. How's it rolling going with Russell rolling, going, things are going good. I'm not like, I'm just looking around, making sure no one's around. Yeah. You wouldn't want somebody to come on and yell at you. Somebody's looking in that window.
[53:00]I have two, I have two different things. First. I wanted to share some of you guys. I did move this week in a new place and there was one or two things that came up, but I'm going to share. So this is, you're in the, you're in the new place tonight. I'm in the new place tonight. I'm in the new downstairs podcast studio where there's technically two floors from where the coat in and it's, it's probably. So you, can I just say this? Your basement looks so much like Matt's basement. This is weird. No, it's bizarre. Like Aaron and I kind of have a similar area and now you two kind of a similar area. It's wild. John's out in the garage. I mean, Rosie's favorite camping spot. I love it. I appreciate you, John. So I was going to say the move went very well, but I was going to share four things that happened with me with this week that kind of rubbed me the wrong way. And the first one had to do with the first one is the moving went really well until we got stuck on getting cable.
[54:00]And internet hooked up through Xfinity dealing with fucking cable companies and the internet companies is the worst rid of it. Yeah. I was on the phone for like five to six hours. We had to go back to the Xfinity store and back. We, we had no disagreements between the co-tenant and I about anything really the whole move. And we were doing good until there were numerous people screaming at people on the Xfinity line. What, what is your guys experience been with, with these type of service providers? She's like, she's like, I don't know why we need this high speed internet. What are you talking about? Streaming HD 3d content. None of this makes any sense to me. Why do you need to be ultra realistic and high definition and have good audio fidelity? Why would you need that? I don't know. Do you guys ever have to deal with that type of thing? How do you get through it without losing your mind? Can I just say this? The answer is Russell. I let my wife take care of everything. Our air conditioner broke. Our dishwasher broke all at the same time.
[55:00]Now, those are two things that Jenny loves. Jenny loves air conditioning and she loves doing the dishes. So for her not to be able to do those things, big bummer, but the dishwasher guy came over and he goes, Oh, is this, do you need to have this fixed? And I said, yes, my wife loves to do the dishes. We need to have this fixed right away. You, it, it is, I think it's bonding as a couple to be mad at some other dumb shit. Cause you normally you'd just be mad at the cable company all by yourself. Right? But now you get to have something to talk about Russell. I mean, to have, for a married couple to have something to talk about for one night. Love it. Oh, do we want to talk about work? No. Do we want to talk about the kid? No. Do we want to talk about the 18 baseball games I've been to this week? No, we're going to talk about how much we hate the Xfinity cable people. It's a godsend. Not in front. Although Rob, you probably got to, you got to, you got to pre rinse that shit and your dishwasher. You've put dishes straight in. I'm going to text her a link to this episode with that timestamp. This guy listens to every word.
[56:01]Never. Nine straight days, guys. Nine straight days. Nine straight days. Crazy. I can't believe it. Be legal to do to POWs. What's that Russ? What happens if you have a different approach than your co-tenant with dealing with this? Like I'm someone who's like, we have to get this done. It needs to be done today. We can't let this ruin another day. Right. Right. And this co-tenant of mine at one point, it's like, Hey, we need to go get something to eat. Like we've been trying to do this forever. We need to get it. And I'm like, I'm like, no, I'm like, no, we need to get this shit done now. Like, no, Russell is talking to a number of people who've been married for quite some time. I think the answer is you could, now here's, I think you have two options, right? You could work together, come to a compromise and try a combination of your methods and see what should work best. Or you could just instantly stop caring, let your wife solve everything. And you feel like you're never doing anything important with the rest of your life. Yeah. I mean, I think those are the two options. You feel like life is just a repeating wheel of mediocrity where you've actually lost all control. So I would recommend going for that option.
[57:00]That's what I've gone with. Oh, geez. Rob, how do you handle these situations? One, Xfinity is the devil. Just get rid of Xfinity and get anything else besides Xfinity in the first place. Don't they got US internet at your place there? The fiber stuff? I cannot do this. That is the best. Wait, where, where exactly are you? Or where, where are we talking about exactly? Yeah. Where are you located, Russell? If you gave us an address, what would that address be? Or like what's near there? I got a message from Magic Mike. He was wondering where you're living now. Exactly. Ass. Wait, I was trying to do a, like a, a map quest. The map thing. Yeah, that's true. Anyway, if it's going to get Magic Mike anywhere near my house, I'm out on the map. I'm with Rob now. That bit sucks. The other thing, other than, go ahead, Matt. I was going to say, so one, just, you can start out by just not getting Xfinity because everybody and their grandma has a story about how bad Xfinity is and the exact situation that you're in right there. So just get rid of them to begin with. But two,
[58:00]I mean, I would, I've absolutely sent my co-tenant out the door. You go out, you go have some drinks, you go eat. Let me just handle this. Cause two people trying to handle that. It's been my experience. It's not, it's just me. It's not my wife or anything. I cannot have like multiple things coming at me, you know, or trying to figure out, or, you know, different opinions. Like I just need to handle it myself. So I would never be able to have a co-tenant trying to handle that with me personally. It's very wise, wise words. So, so other than Xfinity, there was a few other things that kind of got on my nerves this week. The second one is when you move into a new place, you expect like, Oh, it's going to be great. Everything's going to be the way you want it. So we get here. And one of the keys, one of the keys is to this new, this new spot I'm living is it's right along the river, right in Minneapolis. Really cool spot, right by the river walks. You can look out, you know, bikers, runners, you can walk two minutes to get to the river. It's kind of by Harriet Island there where you can see De La Salle high school right across.
[59:00]I'm just doing it. You guys, me too. I'll do it. Yes. I might be. Yes. Island. Bad. Island. Island. Island. Yeah. A little bit there. Yeah. And I've been in first Avenue cross right there. I mean, you got the white castle, white castle, white castle. Yes. I know that white castle. To get right past the twin stadium there, Matt. Magic. Mike is writing this down and getting, finding his nicest sack that he has. But so one of the key, one of the best, the biggest pluses for this house is this great deck that overlooks the, the, the river. And you guys know, I've had a problem with decks before when the, the door was left open and still water and we got the bugs all over. But so, and sometimes you can't get hard. A new room. What? Two. Russ was listening to that CPAP story. Like, yeah, that does sound like a big problem. Wow. You can't sleep very well. I've got, I'm impotent. So we, we get up there and the first thing I do, I look out the window at the river. There are six biffy toilets sitting right in front.
[60:02]Of the river. Like where our view is. And I'm like, these were not here before. Yeah. I, I, I don't care what you're going to say next. Here's what you got to do. Yeah. You have to sit on your patio and when they go in, you start a stopwatch. And when they come out, you just yell out like, Oh, that was two minutes and 30 seconds. That was awesome. 15.4. New records are cameras are for your yellow. So cameras are for scientific purposes only. Russell, you got to take advantage of that. That's a dream come true. I've got a house with three bathrooms. I get in trouble for pooping in any one of them at any time. I would use six new toilets that are in my backyard. Just like you have. You're living in heaven daily. Probably, probably clean daily, right? Yeah. I mean, they got to be clean fairly often. After three days of going in those every time it will clear your chlamydia
[61:00]right up. That blue stuff is like magic. It's like snake oil. It fixes everything. That blue water. Oh man. I'm sleeping better. I'm breathing better. I feel cleaned out. It's the blue water fumes. So anyways, I think it was, there was a festival down here in this area of three 94 in Minneapolis. And I think it was just for the festival. So I'm hoping the biffies are going to be gone, but I thought you guys would get a kick out of, Hey, I get here. I think I've got the greatest view of the city and it's the biffy. I take back my statement. There's nothing worse than a port-a-potty at the end of the festival. That is fucking gross. Oh yeah. At the end of the festival. I went, I, we went to it. Jenny has to go to the bathroom every two minutes. Like, I don't think that's an exaggeration. It's all the time. It's in New York. There's no place worse where you have to go to the bathroom constantly. She once had to go to the bathroom. I'll never forget it. We were at a barbecue tasting. It was a barbecue contest, an outdoor barbecue contest. There was one biffy and they had been cooking and serving barbecue all day.
[62:05]And I was like, I was like, you're going to go in there. I was like, what's the best case scenario. You survive. Like, I can't imagine. I think there are some people that have like a willful, like ignorance of what that's going to look like. They're kind of like blissful. They're kind of in the clouds and they're like, Oh, it won't be that bad. And they, they just have the, they have, they don't even realize how bad it's going to be. Right. Speaking of looking, can I ask you guys a question? Can I have you judge me real quick? Yeah. We have a theme song for, am I a pervert or not? Let's see. Am I? No, we don't. Do you think, do you guys look, can I just ask you this? And let's be honest. Okay. Let's all establish this as a circle of truth. This is a safe place. If you want me to edit it out, I'll edit this out. Do you guys look into the biffy slurpy when you go in? Like, do you look down at the liquid that's there? Like, do you see what's down there? Like, do you take a peek? Of course. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I will walk out if it is,
[63:00]does not meet my standards. Yeah. Wait, what's in the fluid has to meet your standards. What do you expect to be in there? If it's a mountain, I'm gone. I'm going to check the next one. You need, you need the blue, you need the blue water above anything. If it's a lake. Oh, perfect. Oh my God. It's above the high water mark. You're out of there. Cause I, cause you gotta, you gotta make sure there's no splash issues. But it also kind of gets you excited for what's going to happen. Right? You look down and you're like, it's not just me. Everybody, we're all in this together. You know what I mean? It's like a slice of humanity. You're like, yep, we're all, we're all doing the same thing. I don't know. We're all here. We're all here at this dairy and truly festival. Can I tell you my best port-a-potty story? Uh, yes. And see if it hits. So I've been skiing in the American Berkabiner every year. Would this be John's port-a-potty advice corner? It could be. Is there such a thing? You've been doing the Berkabiner? You've been doing the Berkabiner? It's not the corner. Rusty does the Berkabiner. John's port-a-potty. Yeah.
[64:01]So similar to a festival, it's, it's like a marathon on skis, right? So they've got the town of port-a-potties lined up. They're like, there's probably 100 port-a-potties. Well, in prep for these things, oftentimes you eat differently, right? And I did a lot of stuff. And before the race, of course, I had to go to the bathroom. Yeah. I can't, I can't, I can't go do this race without going to the bathroom. And you had beans, but you just drank the bean juice. You didn't eat the beans. You drank the juice that came out. Oh, it was, um, worse than the beans. So I go, I go into my stall and I don't want to put my cheeks on there. It was cold and it's just gross. And so, you're hovering over. I'm hovering. I'm hovering, but my aim was off and I had projectile diarrhea over the backside of the toilet and the wall. Like it misfired bad, terrible. And it was like the most volume of shit I've ever had. And so I cleaned up myself and just got out of there. There's a line and there's a lady in that line.
[65:02]And I said, wasn't me. I kept walking later. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You said, now can I ask you this? It wasn't me. I just pretend I peed. I was there when I got there. So do you think that this song. Walked in the port-a-potty. It wasn't me. Open up, John. It wasn't me. Guys. Hey, Rob. We're doing a shady episode next week. So you can parody this. Oh, that's fantastic. I cannot do a single song off Nebraska. So I will be doing a, it wasn't me, port-a-potty, parody song. What percentage of people have at one point lied about it, them, it not being them coming out of a port-a-potty. 99% 50%. 99. Oh yeah. 99. Yeah. There's like one person out of a hundred who's ever been able to be totally truthful about that. Well, the best part was, was the accident happened,
[66:00]right? And it was terrible, but it was anonymous. And I was like, I got away with it. Well, later on, I'm talking to my brother-in-law after the race. And he said, I went into this port-a-potty and it was destroyed. Diarrhea everywhere on the back wall. I had to just leave. And I was like, no, I told him it was my brother-in-law. I had to share in the, like, you know, the, the conquest of doing it. John, is he looking for a podcast to listen to? Cause I have a perfect one. If that's a conversation you guys are having, I got the perfect idea for what he should be listening to. I'll send them the link. One of the other things that annoyed me this week, I know this is a food podcast too. I went to a Mexican restaurant with a co-tenant and we get there. And if you go to a Mexican restaurant, you got to start with like chips and guac or chips and salsa or something. It's, but it's just part of the bid. Right. And so we order a bunch of tacos. We ordered the chips and salsa to start with the chips and guac. It's like a, it's like a sampler platter of guac and all everything. Yes. We're sitting there. We're waiting, having our drink tacos come out first.
[67:02]And is that the biggest outrage in the history of food service for the tacos to come up before the chips and the guac? Russ removed $1 bill from the tip. Did they bring the chips and guac eventually or no? They brought it like right afterwards. So instead of like having your stuff coursed out, we just had all this food in front of like you didn't, but what are you supposed to do? You can't just let your tacos sit there. Can you Aaron? You got it. You got to eat them. What do you do? Yeah. You got to eat the tacos while they're hot. I mean, you get, yeah, they're going to fall apart if they sit too long. I it's the order of getting meals. You don't realize how important it is until it gets screwed up. And you're like, like just imagine eating an onion ring dessert. It doesn't make any sense. Your head cannot compute. That sounds really good. Onion ring ice cream. I'm in. You guys are losers. It does not compute. And my kids are finding this out because now, you know, they go out on their own or they're going with us and we, they just have more leeway in ordering. Cause they're not ordering off a kid's menu. So my oldest the other day ordered a burger and then she goes,
[68:00]and I'll have mashed potatoes. Full move. Burger came out with mashed potatoes on the side. She goes, what the fuck? She was like, I wanted mashed potatoes as an appetizer and a burger. And I was like, mashed potatoes is an appetizer. That's a real teenage. I was like, can you imagine now? Like eating mashed potatoes and being like, yes, I will also have a burger and fries. And I turned to my wife and I was like, lie down and cry. I turned to Jenny. I was like, can you believe that she wanted mashed potatoes and appetizer? And Jane's like, well, she should get what she wants. I was like, Oh my God, I'm living in like a fantasy world where just everybody's. And then James was like, we should just have drumsticks for Buffalo wings. You should be able to order just drumsticks. And I was like, now wait a minute. Actually you got potatoes as appetizer. And just drumstick chicken wings. It sounds like the perfect restaurant. You got to go just flats. Russell said, did you, cause I would, yeah, I would say just get another margarita and enjoy your chips after your tacos. What'd you do? We did. We tried to eat the tacos first, but it was interesting cause they came out and the one bartender realized that was a
[69:00]fuck up. That's not the way you do things and kind of said, Oh, this should have came out. Sorry about that or whatever. And he was like, by the way, I make a great espresso martini. If you want to try it. Yeah. The guy just stared at us like, like, uh, an idiot for a minute being like, Oh, I screwed up. And he goes, we'll take those off. We won't even make you pay for like, I don't care about that. It's fine. But did they, did they take it off the bill though? No, no, no. And then he was like, I have to rush off to my other job working at Xfinity cable. It's just this guy. And later this weekend, I'm installing more biffies around town. Like this guy just, the final thing that annoyed the shit out of me this week is I went to a twins game last week or a few days ago with my, uh, sister, sister-in-law, nieces and nephews, brother-in-law, about 12 of us go to the game with a bunch of kids. A little, probably a little about Matt's age, Matt's kids, agent, John, how old are your kids? Eight, 13 and 15. Wow. You went up. You went ascending order. 15 years old. Wow. I reversed order. Yeah. I don't know why. You went reverse order. That blows my mind that you did that with the ages.
[70:01]It's because he's from Wisconsin guys. You had a kid 15 years ago. 13 and 15. You don't lead with a 15 year old. I should have. No, but I get it. I had an eight year old. I know. Is that one of the least favorite? No, no order of favorites. Cause you're all the favorites, right? No, it was a, I think I anchored to Matt's kid's age and I started there and expanded up. Oh, that is a psychotic way to think about your kid's ages is to bear it out to people on the podcast. So I'm at the twins game with, with some younger kids ages, let's say four to nine, like four of them, four to nine. So a little bit younger. And one of the bits, the twins do at the twins game, this is a music bit is they'll play a song and they'll put the lyrics up there. So everyone, can sing along. Super fun bit. Kids like that, especially, you know, if they don't know the words of the songs or whatever, they're kind of in that world of like, Hey, I'm reading now and I can, you know, sing along and everything. They're like, dad, dad, this is my favorite Toby Keith song. It's about the boot up your ass. I almost think this is worse. They played the song, Mr. Brightside, which is a great song.
[71:00]But if you listen to the lyrics, it's a horrible song to play with the lyrics up there. she's calling a cab. It's he takes off her dress. Now, let me go pull it up. Rob, this could not be a play it at the twins game for kids to sing along. Can it? And the kids were singing along. She takes off her dress. Now, February of last year. Just pick up a dental dress. Like they do a bit where it's like, makes you think that they're having sex and then it switches to something else. It was only a kiss. It was only a kiss. It seems like a flaw in the twins. It doesn't mean we need to like, not support, not support them with public funding. Like Aaron, his community doesn't want to do to be clear. I do not support public funding. I'm very sad. They're leaving, but fuck them. Can I just say this, Russell, at some point you go to a thing like today, I went father's day. I went to a drag queen thing and our kids are with us, right? Cause it's father's day. So we're bringing them. And this drag queen is a friend of ours.
[72:01]And so we're like, Oh, well maybe this is like, she said, you can bring your kids. It's going to be a good show. She opens with the bit. The microphone is cutting in and out. And she goes, normally in and out is really good for me. Cause I like it in the ass. And I was like, Oh, geez. So I was like, you just have to look at the kids. And then there's like other kids at the table. You just sort of look at smile and be like, yeah, well, I guess we're coming to a drag brunch for a father's day. This is what we're going to get. So your kids, your kids have seen the jackass movies. So they were prepared. They know. Oh yeah. Yeah. I'm like, this is the one where they take a shit in a toilet and it's in the store. It's right outside Russell's house. I mean, just imagine Russell, you're going to look out your window, being like, what a nice day. You're just going to see somebody coming out. It was just taking a massive dump. And all I could think about is, is John for me, dying and what he did just into that bathroom. I'm going to save my, we're going to continue the DVD tournament next week. When we've got a little more time, I'm going to get to Matt. He's always prepared. So Matt Roland going, how's it going with you? Uh, good. I'll keep it short and sweet this week.
[73:00]Uh, Brian from Woodbury. Congratulations. Stay. Yeah. Congratulations. Well done. Well deserved. Right. Congrats. Well, all deserved to win the state championship. I'm sure there's no parents that can complain now. Right. I mean, just never parents can't complain anymore. You got a free card. Look, you did it. Won a state title, bitch. Get out of my face. Right. And I can't believe that. I can't believe that all five of those students just came up from the Dominican Republic this semester. Like that's so right. Right. Are you, are you, you're 18 years old. See, see, you're so 18. And then that one left-handed hitter from Turks and Caicos. Yeah, that's right. It's like when I taught at War Road and I was like, here's the weird thing. This kid from Canada is such a good goalie. And his dad just took a job at our school. He's good at installing Anderson windows. Don't say Anderson windows, Russell. That's sacrilege. It's Marvin. Marvin. Yeah.
[74:00]Marvin arena. I heard one of those kids to clean my bathroom one time. I'll tell you that story off air. Something I realized now as a teacher is not ethical. Well, it's a different time back then. And I, and I came out and I said, it wasn't me. So that's how they knew it wasn't me. I, uh, I did see a live show as well this week. I went, uh, um, at the armory, which is about, uh, I think it's about like eighth and fifth downtown, you know, right across from, how close to Portland blocks away from you. Oh, Portland's that one way, but it's right. Isn't that? Yeah. It's, it's, it's one way or two. No, no, no. I'm thinking frankly is out the other park out. I just had a realization. You guys don't do that bit. Cause you like it. You do it because it bugs me. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I thought I was just describing where people are at a certain educational podcast on father's day too.
[75:02]So I saw modest mouse open up for Weezer. They did play flow down this time. They did. They played it Weezer again. I've said it numerous times. If you're a band from the 1900s and you're still selling out wherever you're at, you're very good at your job and Weezer absolutely killed it. They're a bunch of nerdy rockers who are awesome at their job. So they did really well. Anytime you get a chance to see a Weezer show, I would highly recommend how much of the blue album did they play? Uh, at least half. Oh, love it. Well, well over half. I almost went with the summer song with the, the surf wax USA. That was, Oh my God. That is such a good John. I was in a band growing up that used to play that song. I got to dig up a tape. Pull it up. I don't know. And it has, it has a round guys. We could do a round. Yeah. Remember how to do a round? Let's do it. Let's do it. It's kind of like boondocks, but in a round.
[76:01]Man, you were going way back. That's like episode two. It really has. No, to him, that was only four months ago though. That's the thing. Exactly. this is, yeah. So they, they had, they had like a big screen behind him. It was just awesome. So wait, that's a good song. Let's get to the round. Let's get to the round. This is right up the alley of a, that's gotta be at some sort of American pie movie, right? Same era. You take your car. Now I can never go home. It's so nice. Ramp it up. And so they have, they had a huge, it was animated. It was great. What's the garage song off that album? Phenomenal. Oh, in my garage. I feel safe. So I saw that. Um, I realized that my, the thing that I, I hate the most lately, I just can't stand it anymore.
[77:01]Is it Minnesota goodbye? Does anybody know what the Minnesota goodbye is? Yeah. Well, you're stealing it. It's a Midwest goodbye. Yeah. It's a Wisconsin goodbye. You know, he said, okay, well, we're going to get out of here. And Oh yeah, it looks like it might rain tonight. So, you know, like we better, make sure the deck furniture is put away and Oh, we got some new deck for, you know, just goes on forever. So that's, I, I got to figure out how to get rid of it. So in that vein, I'm just going to end my rolling, going and say, Rob rolling, going, how's it going with you? Weezer, by the way, two 94 on the list. That's going to happen in the next decade. After two, after Van Halen by Van Halen. Yeah. Oh, that's going to be a fun week. Wow. Yep. That's going to be, when are we going to do that? Like in two, two years, 2026, maybe. Yeah. So great. That's going to be awesome. John's like, so John, is it kind of sick when you have to wait like for a week? And maybe I forgot to release it once Tuesday. I don't know. Wednesday. Hey Rob, on Tuesday, I almost fucking road drove off the road. Cause that's my commute and it didn't come out.
[78:00]And I looked at my phone every 10 minutes and it started on my Spotify to tell me when the new episode comes and it wasn't coming. I'm like, maybe it sounds wrong with my phone. And when Wednesday hit, I'm like, God damn it. So I had to re-listen to old episodes. I mean, Russell's got one problem, but our podcast problem is that sometimes we come a lot later than we're supposed to. And people actually get sick of that. And it's a Johnny from now on. I'll tell you what you want. The rough, rough copy, the raw version. You text me. All the jokes are distributing rough cuts. And now that you're, now that you're on the podcast, you get the double secret. Which episode did we never do? Oh, is there a secret episode? What? Oh, the Radiohead Kid A. Yes. Radiohead Kid A. You get the secret, double secret Radiohead, now that you've been on the podcast. You get the super inappropriate songs about Aaron and Matt. Russell's legitimately upset that we released that episode. You would get legitimately. I would. Rob,
[79:00]what's your rolling going? I love to think of, I love to think of John listening to early episodes though. And we're like bleeping out deep dicking. And now we're like, eh, whatever. That's too much work. Eh, whatever. It's fine. Nobody's listening. Rob, do you see my login name here? Oh, of course. Norma Stitz. We're here with Norma Stitz. It's a classic until your kid is named that through middle school. John, a warning. That's got to be changed before you sign off tonight or you're going to have problems tomorrow. Done is done. Real quick. My kid has a play. I said the other night, I went, I don't know what to do because this is a community theater, right? It is hot. Like you go in there, it's hot. So I have on a hot community theater. Yeah. So I'm like, listen, I know it's going to be hot. It's going to be full of people. Shorts and t-shirt. I go in, but I'll tell you what, have you ever had somebody say something to you that you just know you could never come back from? And because they're right. And they just have burned you so bad. And you're just like, I pull up, I see a parent of a friend and the parent has their son there.
[80:01]Who's a middle school aged kid. And the son takes one look at me and turns to his mom and says, see, I told you we didn't have to dress up. That is a bummer. And that kid was, he was eating a massive spoonful of scrambled eggs at that time. You're shoveling in scrambled eggs and saying, that's a deep cut. You know what, Rob? I don't think there's, I think you just got to get over it. Like I have this moment a lot. Like if you go to the, let's say you're going to show at the Orpheum off like 10th and Hennepin, Matt, you know, right up off over by first, over by first Avenue. Yeah. I'll go to things a lot. Cause I like going, try new stuff. And I'm always worried. Like, do I have to overdrive? Do I have to dress for this? Or like, maybe you're going to a restaurant and you're worried about being under, fuck that. Where would you want to wear? Like, you're like, people aren't going to ask you to leave. Nobody's judging you. And if a kid's judging you on what you, who gives a shit, I think you should just dress the way you want. Be who you are,
[81:00]go to the events. And who gives a shit? What other people think? Well, it turns out I do quite a bit because when this kid said this, I was devastated for the next 10 minutes. I was like, I don't even know what to say. Cause he's not wrong. I didn't dress up. And I was like, I'm like you, I'm like, should I dress up? Hold on. It wasn't like mesh shorts. Was it? Wow. Were there pockets? Is there a drawstring? Yeah. Maybe I'll take this all back. If it was mesh. That's the style now though, for middle schoolers. I'm sure John can back me up. It's pajama pants, right? Like, are they wearing, trying to wear pajama pants to school? Yeah. My girls, they're all wearing pajama pants. I was like, I cannot. It's the Billie Eilish thing, right? Like that's her influence. I feel it. It must be, but I, can you imagine you have to wake up and then pick a pajama pants to wear to school? Well, you can't wear the ones you wore last night. It's gotta be a new pair. Nobody will know. Not so sure with my kids. I think. Rob, do you respond to this kid or anything?
[82:01]Or do you just let it hurt your feelings? That's the thing is I looked at the mom and I was like, and the mom, cause what do you say if you're the kid's mom? Oh no, you don't have to dress up or like, no, don't say that about Rob. He's trying the best he can. Like I, I think, I think she, she immediately says, well, we don't, we're not like all families. It's like, I think it's, she'd probably say something. It was, some families do things differently. It just, it totally was just devastating. It's time for nobody's favorite part of the day. It's rough to hear. Oh, was this a music podcast? There you go. This is my favorite part of the episode. A lot of people, a lot of people's favorite parts. My second favorite part is the wrestling dog. I just want to. I guess we're going to have to figure out a way to work that in. I watched a five minute interview today with Hornswoggle on Tik TOK. Yes. Oh, I'm sorry. I saw it on the times. That's what I say now. Instead of Tik TOK. Rob, I saw the times, a five minute interview with Hornswoggle.
[83:01]It was interesting. I stole your Hulk Hogan sushi bit with some buddies of mine and they were on the floor. Just go. It's amazing. Did you guys see, did you guys see the text I sent you where, uh, Bubba the Love Sponge has come out and said that after that, after Hulk Hogan was done deep dicking his wife and burping and taking phone calls, he came back on and Bubba the Love Sponge gave him a new pair of Oakleys and said, you're my best friend, brother. Here's some Oakleys. You know what though? If any of you guys came over and deep dicked my wife, I would also give you a new pair of Oakleys and say we're best friends, brother. Oh, yikes. Even if it was Aaron. Wait, wait, I don't know. You just feel like above that. Like you wouldn't do that. The rest of us, we might. I'd get maybe eaters. He doesn't, if he put on Oakleys, people would instantly think he's like a proud boy. Anyway, Rob,
[84:02]what are your three sentences? I want to hear your three sentences so we can get to why I want to figure out why John wants to be on this. What is this history? But let's hear your sentences. This album jumped all the way from four 52 to in the first list to one 49 on the current Rolling Stone best album of all time list. Uh, and basically this, this whole album just shows you John Prine. I think we can agree. One of the all time great songwriters. Like I was not super familiar with John Prine. I knew more of his stuff off that, um, uh, may the circle be in broken box set and the Johnny Cash as the Johnny Cash box. That is really what he's on. Um, but he, I mean, his song, Johnny Cash recorded a bunch of his songs. Yeah. He's a great songwriter. You're right. The writing is just unbelievable. Prine grows up in Chicago, right? You think of him as like this country Americana guy grows up. In Chicago, he plays, starts playing guitar at 14. He goes to a school called the old town school of folk music. John Prine went to a school for folk music. That is incredible. Shocking. And basically he would play around these clubs in Chicago.
[85:02]He's also a mailman at the time. And Roger Ebert gave him a good review. So Chris Christopherson decided to come in and see him, uh, and says, basically, you're great. You should come play with me. The record company sees him playing with Chris Christopherson in New York city in the West village and says, Hey, you got to come do an album. So he goes and records an album in Memphis with this Arif Mardin, who's been with Aretha Franklin and King Curtis before. And so basically all these musicians were like, yeah, we had John Prine come in and they had just like been recording stuff with like Elvis or somebody. And now they're switching to John Prine. They're like, it was a totally different, I mean, can you imagine going from Aretha Franklin to John Prine? I mean, it'd be, it'd be such a huge change. I mean, I didn't know that till you told me, but the, I mean, the band is super tight on this album and it's like a lot, a lot of the music's, you know, simple, straightforward stuff, but they play it. They play the hell out of it. John Prine was nominated for best new artist in 72 didn't win. And as one of the few bands who was nominated, but did not win best new artist and later won a great Grammy lifetime achievement.
[86:04]So these are people who did not win the best new artist Grammy, but were nominated, but went on to win a lifetime achievement. You're ready for this list. The Beatles, Chicago, cream, Jefferson airplane, Antonio Carlos, Hobim, uh, Led Zeppelin, uh, Linton price and John Prine. All those people were nominated best new wild list and didn't win. It is a wild list. Uh, let's get into, well, yeah, let's hear from John a little bit. Like we, this is something we don't really like to do have other people on. Cause we're worried they're going to steal our thunder, be funnier than Rob or, or tough to do more music than Aaron. But like we were, we, John asked to be on, on John Prine. So like, what's your history with John Prine? What, why do you want to talk about it? Yeah. Russell, number one, you are the best question. It's a nice asker. I've ever heard podcast. I love it. It's true. It's a fantastic element. And the answer to that is actually John Prine is my Prince to Aaron.
[87:04]Oh man. This is so great. I'm so excited. I did see him once wearing pants where he could see his butt. So that makes sense to me. John said it was a secret smile. Yes. With the assless chef. No, it was, this is an artist that I've greatly, really respect and love their stuff. And I never saw him live. And I lost that chance when we lost him to COVID. And after he passed away, we sat in our living room, like most Americans. And I had John Prine blaring on our Sonos and we were doing puzzles. And that was just, was kind of the new normal for us. So it was like a, a realization, like I need to go see people live. Matt, you are very good at this. I failed at Weezer. I should have been there. I wasn't, I should have held, held to my principle, but going to see these people before you can. So that, that was my John Prine. So I was hoping in participating in this podcast, I could get a little bit of karma back from missing out on his,
[88:00]his live performances. You're going to be able to see more concerts too. Cause you're not so sleepy. It's so good. You're getting so much better sleep that you're going to be able to stay out later. So this is good. I also going to ask John one other question. Cause this is, I think Matt mentioned this. I didn't know that you were into music or that you played or like, do you have any sort of like musical background or did you like John Prine growing up or what? Do you play guitar or anything like that? John? Cause I did not know that you did. If you do, I am obsessed with music and I had a similar experience to Rob. I got to say, and all of thinking I know music and I walk into the kid's room and he picks up his Jackson guitar with his Marshall stack and he just starts ripping. And I was like, I'm worthless. And so it's kind of like your base example, Rob, when the kid picked up your base and started playing the, the, just the worst. So, so I thought, it'd be like, it'd be like if somebody had your exact same dick and your wife was like, I love this. This is so good. And you're like, it's same tools. The way you're operating it. Yeah. Yeah. I got the same one. Yeah.
[89:00]But no, I, I love music. I play guitar, mandolin, bass. After college, I played in a couple of bands. I had a question for you guys. So, you know, our number one band was liars and saints, right? Of course. Yes. That was their second name. What was the original name? Do you remember? Jamestown. Yes. Oh, nice. Good job, Russell. I didn't remember that. Excellent. And you, do you remember then that the class above, we actually had a, a classmate of ours, Luke from, from Minneapolis that drummed for them. What was the name of that band? We like cream of weed. It takes one small step to bring a whole city down. No, not the limestones. Oh, I'm talking about catnapping. You guys remember catnapping? Catnapping. I forgot what they were called. It was Chris Koza. And then Koza broke off and, yeah. What a great. Great band name. I forgot they were catnapping. Yes. Those are kind of like, so did you ever play John? Did you ever play with anyone in college or no? You know, I, I jammed in the dorm rooms with a couple of those guys like, uh, Eric from California,
[90:00]who was part of catnapping and, uh, Anton from, or excuse me, from, uh, liars and saints and Anton from liars and saints. We, we would jam, but I mean, they were just humoring me, right? I mean, the talent of those guys and guys like Aaron, he can't, he can't compete. I'll never forget. I was at a party once with John and he, he was playing you two on a guitar and I didn't play guitar at the time, but he was playing you two on a guitar and all these women were looking at him. And I was like, God damn, I got to start. I was like, honestly, I was like, I've seen this job. I do some stuff. I know I could learn to play guitar. I know what this is possible. And actually it was something I thought of when I, when I learned how to play guitar, I was like, I got it. I could be sitting at a party with people looking at me. Rob, did he then take that guitar and waffle it over one of his friends? He had like a honky tonk man over a magic penny. He was, yeah, he, I, he stood up and he, he, first of all, he made the people record it on their iPhones, just like you two would. And then I knew something was bad because the song he started to play was, and when somebody starts playing this thing,
[91:00]guitar at a party, you know, you're about to get the shake right. There you go, John. I want to, I want to double back. Was John Prine, someone who you felt like you didn't appreciate him enough when he was still alive, or you knew his stuff when he was alive? I was a big fan. Once he, good question, Aaron, uh, big fan when he was alive, missed out on seeing him live when I had many of opportunities to do it in Duluth and in the Twin Cities. So Duluth's a 35, uh, just North of the Twin Cities. Oh, sorry, Rob. Last one, last one, last one. That man was too zoomed out for me to like it. But I never did. Cause I was lazy. I'm like, I'll see him next time he comes to town. Well, yeah, right. He didn't come to town again. So I missed out. And, and actually now I'm getting much deeper into his catalog than I probably would have had, did not transpire the way it did. Right. Well, I have to say before you start, before you start the album, there is a perfect song on this album. I'm sure John will get to it, but there is a perfect song. Okay. Let's, let's play that perfect song right now.
[92:01]Ooh, this is good. I like that. There it is. That song was actually written by John Pratt. A lot of people don't know that. Illegal Smile. Is this not the perfect song? Cause I think this is a perfect song. This is pretty close. It's such a good song. Aaron, you've talked about this, this song once. I don't remember what episode before, but you talked about this. I don't remember why. Well, cause I think he swears that this song was not about drugs, right? Like in interviews, he said this wasn't about drugs, but even out of his way to say numerous times, John from Udina, what do you think? It absolutely has to be about drugs. What else is in Illegal Smile? Like I'm going to get high and I'm going to smile. Everything is going on. All my friends are insurance salesmen. Like that's fucking crazy. Shut up. Was I going to make this? A secret smile of Russ hiding in the porta potties outside of his apartment. Cause all he has to do is put on a wetsuit and some goggles and he's right there. Okay. I could do a parody song about that situation or not.
[93:04]Okay. Listen to the end of this podcast. If you hear a parody song about Russell and getting into the porta potty to Illegal Smile, that's going to be gold. Oh, I can't wait for two Tuesdays from now. Do you guys hear that picking pattern? Did you hear that? It was just a methodical. Hit it again, Ron. So John Prine was famous for using, it's called the Travis picking method, right? It's a method that is used all through rock and roll and folk, right? I mean, you hear it on a landslide from, from Fleetwood Mac. Oh yeah. Kansas played it. It's what it is. It's, it's your thumb plays kind of the quarter notes, bass notes, right? Kind of strumming between strings, five, five and six. And then your fingers just do a repeating pattern on kind of doing that melody that you hear him playing. So you're going to hear it. I've always kind of had to change my finger pattern up.
[94:01]I've always heard. It's better to change that pattern. I read the alphabet. Right. Just get a variety. Yeah. Aaron thinks you play two strings with the two fingers and one string. What is going on? So John, real quick, because I'm, I don't play, but so you're, you're plucking essentially with your fingers, right? But then you're, the top finger is playing like the bass, like you're. So it's your thumb that is playing the bass note strings of the guitar, right? The six string guitar. And you're just, just boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. But this is the hand that would normally be holding a pick instead of picking. Okay. Gotcha. So you're using your, it's finger picking, right? And so you now have five picks and your thumb is doing the baseline and your four fingers are doing the melody. And that's John prime playing the guitar in this one. Bingo. Oh yes. Can I, can I just say, I use the Travis method when I drive home from the bar where I have a couple of drinks and it helps me get home. I was going to say,
[95:00]I use the Travis method for mining where I'm looking for coal and I find a diamond. But at the end, I decided to drop the hammer on Randy Travis, that son of a bitch. He did one thing wrong in his life and I'll never let him down. Oh no. I had another Travis method and I can't remember what it is. Something about Travis trit, but I don't know anything about Travis trit except for that fringe outfit. He was wearing that one time. Let's do. I got, I got a rice cooking in the microwave. Got a three day beard. I don't plan to shave. That's a summer song. That is a good summer song. The bit I was going to do for this album was, uh, I was going to look on YouTube and read comments from each one of these songs and laugh about how funny they were because they're all the most depressing comments. And I was going to see if we could power through the podcast. You know what? I'm going to just look at the comments for this song and I'll show you why this would not be a good bit to do. Okay. So we're just going to look at, what are the, what are the comments on the YouTube for illegal smile? Okay. And I'm just going to go through, let's just read it first on the podcast.
[96:00]A, I didn't do this bit because it's bad, but I'm going to do the bit anyway. Check it out. It actually sounds like a lot of the podcast. If you think about it, lost my dad in 2014. When I listened to this song, I could picture it to him singing along. Okay. So make a joke about that guys. We can do it. We're good. We're funny enough. We need this handicap doing this. This is like in horse racing where the jockey weighs a little less and they put some weight on his back to make sure, he weighs the same. My God, the news hurts so bad to read. I pray for us. Okay. So we don't have to do this anymore. Like that was not. Nope. Okay. Next song. But maybe one more comment. You guys want to look at the next one? Okay. Spanish pipe dream. This every song paints a picture of almost immediately. Like you can put yourself into the song as a story. Who's playing the slide guitar in this or the steel guitar? I don't know. That's not, I don't know. It's not John. Okay. But the bass player is everyone's favorite air raid coach. Also now passed away. Mike Lee, Mike Lee, the bass player on this album is the guy named Mike Leach.
[97:02]So that's funny. All right. I was going to pull up his greatest hits, but I, we might have a different list tonight, but I was going to do a whole bit on like the fat little girlfriends with Mike Leach, the bass player from John prime band. I love the, the blow up your TV line. What do you ever hang out with people that watch a lot of the news? I went down to see my folks. I was so sad the other day. And my mom was telling me all this stuff. And I was like, what are you talking about? I don't know about any of this stuff. And I was like, it's just somebody who watches the news. I don't think I could do it mentally. Like I couldn't keep up with the news. I can barely, what's the point. I, I, I sometimes get like over serious about Tik TOK stuff. I'm looking at it. I'm like, Hmm. Like right now, you know what they're showing me a ton of right now, cleaning horse hooves or cow hooves that have become great. Aren't they? They're like, they're like, there's a lot of, they've passed under this hoof and they're like cleaning it out. And I'm like, so I'm on a train watching this. I'm like, there are two of these fuckers in the world.
[98:04]It's so good. Thank you, John. John and I are going to start our own podcast. I don't know. I'm whispering to all of you. Yikes. Hello in there guys. This is a classic song. Okay. It's about Russell at the Timberwolves game. Okay. It's, it's a song saying how much they love. He loves old. And it's interesting. Cause he said the song is structured in a way. The version of the song is structured in a way. The verses tell the tale and the chorus tells the moral of the story. I was hearing this on the, I was going to ask Aaron and John, maybe you guys can jump in there. There's two people. I think of when I hear this one, there's another third one too, but the first is Bob Dylan. Like, is this a Bob Dylan ripoff? Is it fair? Or am I on the line to say this is like a Bob Dylan impersonator? I wouldn't say impersonator. I think you can't do, you can't talk about American singer songwriters without the shadow of Dylan. Right. But I, I think prime was doing his own thing. Cause I think he's a little bit more straight forward,
[99:03]like cutting with it, like a more of an edge to it. Cutting. I don't know, John, what do you think? By this time to Dylan's out for eight years, right? Like Dylan's not a new artist anymore by 71. Go ahead, John. I was going to say same genre. So Russ, I appreciate the, the question, my opinion, similar to Aaron, very different. And my personal opinion, I can't stand Bob Dylan. That harmonica. Yes. I can't do it. I think Dylan's more off the wall. I think John prime to, to what Rob was talking about. He tells you that story and you feel like you're in the room with them and you know, the uncle and you know, that person and you know, that stripper as you're going to Montreal, like you feel like you're there and, and Dylan's songs. I just, I don't connect. And maybe that's just, just me. It's like Dylan's songs take place in more of like a dream world. And John prime songs are like here in on earth kind of. Yeah. Interesting.
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