Run-D.M.C: Raising Hell (1986)

[0:00]In 2020, four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums as decided by Rolling Stone magazine. This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music, excoriated the order, and led us to making this podcast. We are far from experts, so we promise to do almost no research. All opinions are our own, unless you disagree. Please sit back and enjoy. Beck did it better. Guys, between recordings, I ate some sushi with some jalapenos on it. Not recommended by the Radio Announcer's Guild of America, I can tell you right now. I'm hurting. Can't a sushi record with jalapenos on it? It's like a treasure roll. I don't know. It just looks good. I had sushi night, too. Well, yeah, we had sushi night where I ordered, of course, rice and soup for the girls. And then they say, ooh, I eat sushi. So wild. We were all the way up to 209. Guys, we're almost to the what? I almost have to go see my massage person, because we're almost to the 210s. I texted my massage person, who's also named Jenny. That's amazing. I said, hey, are you around? I'm dying. And Jenny said, wrote back, the three worst words I've heard on a text in a long time.

[1:00]I'm in China. Oh, no. My massage person's in China. This is terrible. We call first world problems. What if you were texting your wife, Jenny, and she were in China? What would you be feeling? He's like, who's going to ignore me while I'm writhing in pain on the floor of my bathroom When I fall out of the tub again? Oh, my God. For real. But like I said, what are you going to do? You hear me maybe die? I mean, don't. I don't know. Come look. Either way. Yeah, just get it in the morning. Yeah. You got to get your night. Like, you're going to need a good night of sleep either way. If Rob's dead, you got a lot of stuff to deal with in the morning. You're going to want to be. I'm going to let him lay there, lose some weight, and then maybe I could move him later. Okay. No, RFK Jr. Comes in with a saw. Saws off my head, puts it on his car, drives around. What? Whoa. You guys didn't read the story about how RFK Jr. Would go to the beach and find a dead whale and saw the head off and then put it on the Top of his car and drive home. I'm out on too much serious stuff.

[2:00]I'm out on my life. The other day. I've tried to read as little as possible about that. It's me. It's RFK Jr. I want to be president. I mean, did you ever hear him talk? That's what he sounds like. No. I tried not to engage. You got to hear. I missed his speech. You got to hear RFK. Why? Why does he matter? Because you got to hear this voice. This guy tried to run for president. Just listen to this. I want to be his best friend. What do you want on your gravestone? And he said, it's crazy. And you know why he talks like that? I'm not making fun of him. It's because he has had so much testosterone replacement. He's the original low T. He's the low Mr. T. Oh, he's low. He's Mr. Low T. So it took his voice like that. Low Mr. T. Low Mr. T. Mr. Low T. A bit of who. Okay. It's craziness. Okay. You guys don't like this bit. So I'm moving on. I mean, it's, it's not that we don't like the bit. It's just, it's, it's arguably. It's arguably been done. The bit may have.

[3:00]You accused him of going to the well too many times, Aaron? I feel like there's still meat on this bone. Being a witch is like a skull I put on the top of my car. Look it up. It's a great story. We have an album that wants us to walk this way to see a band called Run DMC. Make up your mind about the pace here. That's a good joke. I like that. Run DMC with Raising Hell. Okay. Well, I've been what? I've been trying to write Run DMC jokes all night. But it's tricky. It's tricky. Let's get into, speaking of tricky, sometimes it's tricky to write these parody songs, But I wouldn't know because I don't do it. I just run the radio station. Is that what I am? Am I running the radio station? I'm like the general manager and I've named it after myself. That's crazy. You're the late night guy. You're the Wolfman Jack. That's true. Wolfman Rob. Let's turn on K-Rob. K-R-O-B. What's up, everybody? Welcome to K-Rob. K-R-O-B. You know, I think I'll have the, what's that?

[4:00]Oh, nevermind. He's got it. Oh, yeah. I go out to eat with Aaron, the food we all are sharing. But when I try to order some fries, he turns into a Karen. Aaron likes to order the food. His friends get screwed. I think it's rude. It's icky. Oh, it's icky. Icky. Icky. Aaron only orders gross stuff squashed in something called corn smut. It's icky. Icky. Icky. Icky. Icky. Icky. Aaron's at the venue. He's staring at the menu. If you want the stew, he says, fuck you, and then he orders for you. Hope you like some salmon raw, and then some caviar. If you try to speak, he'll get big feet, and then the foie gras. Aaron likes to order the food. I think it's rude, but he's that dude. It's icky. Icky. It's icky. Icky. Icky. Icky. Especially if it's all females, then he prevails. He'll order their meals. It's icky. It's icky. Icky. Icky. His wife ordered, but he ignored her, and he got the squash.

[5:00]No one wants it, but he bought it, because he is the boss. Everyone knows he's in control. He orders all that shit. He has his fill. He gets the bill. Then he wants to split it. Aaron likes to order the food. His friends get screwed. I think it's rude. It's icky. It's icky. Icky. Icky. Icky. The food he gets, it tastes like shit, but you are forced to eat it. It's icky. It's icky. Icky. It's icky. I ran out of syllables there at the end. I did one extra. That's impressive, man. You like that? Yeah. Also, icky. What a word. I just could not imagine that we did that episode where Aaron talked about ordering, I want to Remind you, squash blossoms and corn smut as a quesadilla. When I told my kids that, they just rolled their eyes. And yet, all the voicemails we got were about the dogs barking. This is what I'm talking about. We are trying too hard. Listen, I've got three guys here. They want to talk about Run DMC.

[6:00]They don't care about sleep. Okay? We're not doing anything else. All right? Hey, Run DMC, three of them, three of you guys. Hmm. I wonder who's on the wheels of steel here. I've got Matt in Minneapolis. Matt, how are you doing? Good, Rob. There's someone I used to see, but she don't give a damn for me. Wow. Wow. I've got Russell. What? I'm recalling that is not off this album. This makes me think that maybe Matt didn't listen to it. I've got a ton of Run DMC to prepare for this album. That's good, Matt. That's a good bet. I've got Russell in Minneapolis. Russell, how are you doing? Guys, this quote is my recital, and I think it's very vital to rock a rhyme Because Rob's finally on time. It's Robby. Hey, it's Robby, Rob. Sorry. See, it's actually easy to write those very nice songs, Russell. You nailed it. And I've got Aaron out in California now. Aaron and I were talking, and we decided that if we were a musician, I would never ask the crowd how it's going. Because I know the answer is always, woo!

[7:00]Is this where I introduce myself? Because I like that line where he says, I wear them yellow and green when it's time to get ill. Let's talk about Run DMC. Listen, let's not waste any more time. Let's get right into the voicemail. He's on the phone. The freaks. Don't leave me alone. Matt, this voicemail is seven seconds long. I picked it just for you. Would you rather drink a dirty Coke or a fluffy Coke? Now, I have to admit, I was like, am I getting pranked here? A dirty Coke or a fluffy Coke? Now, listen to this. I have not heard of this. Now, of course, I have been drinking the Oreo Cokes. Disgusting. Not going well for you. My work, my place of work also bought the Coke-flavored Oreos. And they also turned out to be disgusting. Oh, that sounds even worse. In a flip. But we got a call. And this is why I love the foot freaks out there. They know what we want to talk about. And the answer? The answer is a dirty Coke, okay, is made by pouring Diet Coke over ice

[8:00]And adding coconut syrup, lime juice, and half. Yes. Would you rather have that, a dirty Coke, or a fluffy Coke, Where you add, you line a glass with marshmallow fluff, And then you add ice and Coca-Cola to it? Gross. Which one are you? Okay, so I was actually going to say fluffy Coke. Because, guys, a marshmallow fluff in a drink? What else are you going to do with that marshmallow fluff? It's in the cup. It's in the pantry. You've been slowly eating it over the last week or so. Russell, what would you do? A dirty Coke or a fluffy Coke? You know what? I'm not going to do either of these Cokes. But I will tell you about something that I used to do. Yes. I had a coworker today tell me she had strep throat. And I was asking, do they still give you, like, the pink medicine? Like, did you guys ever have strep throat when you were a kid? You had to take the pink. With a spoon? Yeah, the pink thing with the spoon, right? Yeah. So when I was a kid, if I got strep throat, the way my mom helped the pink medicine go down, We would do the pink medicine. And we would chase it with a small, like, tablespoon of Hershey's syrup.

[9:00]Oh, full of sugar. Yeah. So you coat your, like, it's you're not tasting that pink stuff. You're just tasting the Hershey's syrup, right? So it's easier to drink it. The problem with that was, is it became, like, a thing for me, Where if I were to get ice cream, Rob's favorite thing, I would never, ever get it with some sort of chocolate syrup on it Because I still taste that pink medicine for it. So I would not drink either of the Cokes. But I'm going to say, like, when you start mixing weird stuff together, I think it can ruin everything for you. So I'm going to say don't put any of the marshmallow in the Coke Because it's going to ruin it for you forever. It's amazing, isn't it, how much we have those childhood memories And how much they affect us when we get older. It's like, imagine if you're, like, jacking off in the shower And your mom is pounding on the door saying, hurry up. Like, that would probably mess you up for a long time, right? Like, it would make you associate weird stuff. Do you go faster to get done faster? How do you handle that, Rob? Are you a brat? I mean, it might make you, like, search for something in your life

[10:00]That you know you're never going to find. You know what I mean? Like, it's so weird. Oh, I get what you're talking about, Russell. You're a brat. I'm not going to hurry up. I'm a brat. I'm going to take longer. I'm not saying that. This is not a funny joke. I'm not saying that. Stop it. You started it. Aaron, what do you think? Dirty Coke or fluffy Coke? I'm trying to – you guys see what I'm dealing with? I'm out here trying to build on my coworkers' jokes And then he shuts them down. I'm going dirty Coke, man. That sounds great. The vanilla and the lime and the coconut. That sounds delicious. I might have to try that. Half and half? That sounds like a Vietnamese coffee. I'm in for it. But I got to say, if you go out and you buy a dirty – a diet Coke And then you add half and half, That feels like you're kind of defeating the purpose of it. You know what I mean? When I go full Coke, why is it going to be a diet? Right. It's what it says, diet Coke. I don't know. Matt, what do you think? Dirty Coke, fluffy Coke? I feel like this is, like, kind of how I've been voting politically lately Where it's I'm not voting for something. I'm just voting against something. I'm voting against something else. And the dirty Coke –

[11:00]Are you voting for me, Matt? The guy who puts the whale head on the hood of the car, Marries the lady from Curb Your Enthusiasm. He had a friend who said that he was such a coxswain when he was younger That he said, if I don't get a strange piece of ass every day, I get a migraine headache. I mean, I would have voted for him. Yeah. I could send in that duplicate absentee ballot they sent me. Oh, I've got tons of those. Fire him in. Just fire him. So I don't know if I could go with the coconut syrup and the half and half, So I'm going to have to go with the fluffy Coke. Matt does hate vegetables, and we all know that coconut is indeed a vegetable. Guys, let's hop out of this. What a great – Hey what I'm going to do? I'm going to put it on the Instagram, okay? They have to decide, dirty Coke, fluffy Coke, or dumb and dumber, okay? Which – Which of these is our – Or guy from Chicago.

[12:00]So you're going to get to pick dirty Coke, fluffy Coke, dumb and dumber, Guy from Chicago. Those are your choices. Let's get into rolling going. It's, it's, it's, it's time to see what everybody's up to. It's time for rolling going. Oh, yeah. Listen, your voice is going to be messed up, But you're not going to have gyno-masty anymore. What? Makes you think. Aaron, rolling going. How's it going with you? Aaron? Can you go mute? I'm here. No, I'm good. I'm good. I definitely have – Scared us. Something to say, and I've got – Are you quitting? – lots to discuss. No. Hey, Aaron, I know your brother went to bed. Are you going to rip him? Are you waiting the bakeries out of the room? There's been a lot happening in my life. I've been on a bender for a couple days. It's getting late at night. I've never blanked on a rolling going before,

[13:00]But here we – Call on me. Do you want me to call on me first? Yeah, let's go with Russell first. Was it about RFK? Because I already did that bit, okay? And apparently it's no good, Even though somebody keeps coming back to it. Rolling going. Things are going well with me, guys. You know what? I was going to share some with you. I bought an item the other day, And I think it was the first luxury item Or, like, brand luxury item I've ever bought. And we can either do, like, a 20 questions. You guys could each – Why don't each of you guess, like, one item? Is it? Is it? I would say it's a luxury brand item, I would say. I think that's probably the best way to put it. Can I ask the first question? Yeah, please. Is it something that you wear Or that you could put on your body? Yes. Is it something you would wear On the upper part of your body? That is correct. That's two. I know what it is. I know exactly what it is. Is it made of – Is it made of gold? No, there is no gold on this item.

[14:00]Oh. Matt? Is it on your appendage, So your arms or your hands? Oh, I like it. I would say it could be involved on there. I'm going to say yes. Okay. Is it a gold ring that a roommate bought you Because she's sick and tired Of what's been happening? Hey, we don't need to get into details here, But if anyone's sick and tired Of what's happening around here, It's the Rust Band. So we – Oh, that's a no. Okay, go ahead, Matt. Go ahead. That's five, Aaron. Is it functional? Does it do anything for you? Yeah, it is. I would say it is functional. It is functional. Okay. Okay. Is it tailored? No. That would be seven. No. Is it a really nice watch, Russell? No, eight. Incorrect. Oh, not a watch. No, it is not a watch. It's not on an appendage. It's kind of on an appendage. That's why, but it's not – That's why I was thinking – Okay. I think I know. I think I know. Rob? Russell? Yeah.

[15:00]Did you pierce your ears? Rob, actually, unfortunately, You spent all of the time last week Talking about – Thinking about your balls, So I may have pierced something else, But I did not pierce my ears. Oh, wow. I was thinking about getting my ears pierced And getting a feather earring like Mr. T. Is that crazy? No. Yeah. All right. I should do it. Is it – Russell, is it a nice suit? It's not a suit, no. Are they cufflinks? Aaron, it's not cufflinks. Nine is out. Did you get a gorilla for your mouth? No. Damn it. That's number 10. Is this main function to keep you warm? Incorrect, Matt. 11, it is not main function to keep you warm. Russell would never buy a nice jacket in October. No way. He would just wear a hoodie. There's just no way. Yeah, I've had years Where I didn't even have like a winter jacket Where I've just worn hoodies. Like, yeah. You walked over to Old Main just wrestling a hoodie. Matt sent a picture of his like – He had a new St. Olaf reverse weave champion sweatshirt. I didn't say this, Because I would never, ever wear a sweatshirt without a hood.

[16:00]I don't think I've worn a sweatshirt without a hood in 20 years. You know what, Russell? I think – And I don't want to – You're not nearly as big as I am, But I think that's a big guy thing Because I feel exactly the same way. It must be the cut of it or something, right? When I put on a sweatshirt with a hood, I feel like a tube of toothpaste getting squeezed. You know what I mean? Like, I feel it's just tight in all the wrong places. I totally get it. But, Matt, you look good in the St. Olaf reverse weave. That sweatshirt kicked ass. I thought it looked sharp. You guys are at 11 questions. Nine more to go. Is it – Oh, is it a – God, what could it be then? Is it a – I'll ask the question. Is it considered a piece of jewelry? No, it's not jewelry. Okay. Eight more to go. Aaron, what do you got? What do you got a question for me? Can you put things in it? Absolutely. You can put things in this. Oh, here we go. Here we go. That's 13. Is it a foreskin? Actually, I did upgrade this last week, But we're not going to go into the details of that. That's surgery. Yes. Russell went big time. He's all the way up to a six skin now.

[17:00]Rob was telling me this whole thing About this waiting system, And it got a little intense, But I got to say it drove me forward. Does it hold items for your profession or your job? It does, Matt. Okay. Okay. It is an attaché case. What the fuck is that? Rob, hit the music. I don't even know what to say to that. Attaché case? Attaché. You think he's a spy? What the hell? That very well could be what it is. I don't know if that's spy film. You think he bought a suitcase made of wire With paper around it? What are you talking about, Aaron? Paper machine. You know what? I think I got ripped off. I don't know enough about what Aaron just said. I might have to just award him the victory. Do I give it to him or not? You know, guys what? I'm just going to give you the answer. I got a Tumi backpack. I've got a brand, like, a high luxury item backpack With all the pockets. It's got the pocket where you can, with the, Where you can put a bottle of water and it's waterproof.

[18:00]It's got all the pockets, man. It's got, it's got the sleeve where you can put your laptop in it. It's got my initials. You guys can see my initials. Hey, come to me next, Russell, with a rolling goal. Your initials are M-R-S-E-X. That doesn't make any sense at all. But Russell, what prompted you? Did you buy this yourself or did you get it as a gift Or how did we get it? You know what, man? No, the interesting, I'm not like a luxury item guy. I remember like being as a kid, like my mom would get like the coach purse And it was such a big deal to have like the high end thing. And I've never, I never have gotten that. I've never been into that. But I, I use a, I have used a backpack at work. Like I bring my computer home and back and forth every day. So I use a backpack every day. And I, since I've known Aaron in college, have only had two backpacks. They were both blue Jansport backpacks. Wow, I remember those. I had one in college and I have had one until a few weeks ago.

[19:00]And one of my colleagues, like she knew my backpack Because she was like, yeah, Russ has got like the old, Like the high school backpack. And finally, can I just say my kid this year begged me For a Jansport backpack. They're in, aren't they? I was like, they are. Okay. Go to Target. There's a huge wall. Yeah, it's crazy. Thanks, Joe. Yeah. But so I realized, okay, maybe it was time. I go to enough professional events Where you're using the backpack. And I was like, maybe. So a few weeks ago, the zipper broke on it. There was no saving it. So for about a week and a half, I was carrying around a broken backpack Where the zipper just closed half, like up on top. And finally I decided I needed a new backpack. I spent some time like doing some research, reading all about them. I was like, this is an item I'm going to use every day. It's just like Aaron's Eames chair. He's going to sit in. I'm going to go get a high-end backpack. What do you guys think of getting a high-end brand name backpack or, Or something along those lines? That's awesome. So it Russell, is it that much better?

[20:00]Like, does it feel better? Do you feel better? You know what? I feel that there's more blood going to your balls when you're wearing this thing. You know what? You know, what's interesting about the backpack is there's something about The way they set it up where you can put a ton of stuff in it. But when you put it on, it doesn't feel like it's dragging you back. And I don't know the way they build them, but it's amazing. It's kind of got like the breathable back. So Aaron, for us sweaty guys, if you're carrying this through the airport, It's, it, it feels better. I'm going to say one of the best purchases I've ever made. I'm really enjoying my Tumi backpack. That is so fun. When you have a great purchase and it works out, it feels so good. Doesn't it? You know, it's like all those Instagram shirts I bought that are somehow Too short, like they're fat guy, but they're also short. And then the sleeves are small. Yeah. That you, when you buy something good, that all washes away. Somehow this backpack is one where like, if you set it down, It stands up no matter what's in it or not in it. Oh, I love that. I love that. There's no way the Jan sport can do that. So I miss the Jan sport.

[21:00]I loved it, but I got a luxury item. I was thinking about Aaron when he got his Eames chair and I was like, Sometimes you got to spend a little on yourself when you've earned it. And it what, this paid off and I'm really enjoying it. Man, you have Russell, man. I want to say this to just you right now. Doesn't this make you want to have Aaron's job instead of Russell's job? I, can you imagine Aaron talking about having a bag to haul papers around Or whatever Russell's carrying around? I don't know. I don't know. You could be doing gold bullion for all I know. That sounds, whatever Russell's job is, Sounds terrible if you need a backpack to carry stuff back and forth, Unless it's a bike. I mean, I'm, I am probably closer to Russell. Oh, for sure. And you guys think like, I, I have a, what do I've got? I've got like a Swiss gear. I think I bought it at target. Thanks, Joe. Now I've got it probably for 10 years now and the back is finally wearing out. So Russell, I am in the market for, I don't know if I could wear a fancy one like that. I think I need my rugged one that I don't mind throwing up into the.

[22:00]It's what, for me, man, it was just the, it, it, It was hard to wrap my mind around the price tag on it. Yep. Once you kind of tell yourself, this is an everyday part of my life, You gotta just lean into it. Right. It's kind of like cell phones, right? Like people probably use their cell phone more than they use their car or Anything like that. Right. And so like, why not get like the $1,500 cell phone that you use? Six hours a day for 17 years. I'm telling you, I paid $600 for my Apple max headphones. And I would do it again tomorrow in a heartbeat. I wouldn't even think twice about it for the amount I use it. The amount I love it. There's nothing even close. Absolutely. Absolutely. Russell Aaron just texted me. He wants to know, what did you pay for that backpack? We got, no, we're not, no, we don't need Russell. Come on, give me a ballpark. Give me like an empty ballpark. Never to be filled with the team again, figure bleep it out. If you bleep it out. Wink. I, okay.

[23:00]My fans out there just send a text to the back line and you might get a reply. This makes me sick. I paid $500. Oh, okay. I was going to say, I think that's a ton for a backpack. It is. I mean, yeah, but it's not, it's insane. If you pay for 20 years well, maybe it's not as a luxury of an item as if you Were, if you had it for one year, if you haven't for a long time, it's Worth it. Wear it for one year. $5 a day. Have you ever asked your significant other how much money they have to spend before they Talk to you? Have you ever had that conversation? No, but the conversation we did have is, is cause I know she had gotten a new backpack A while, probably about a year ago or so. And she got it from her employer gave them, like, if you're there for a certain Amount, you get like a gift or something. And she got some luggage and a backpack and she was like, oh, I got a new backpack and She showed it to me. And I was like, I'm like, man, I think this is one of the really nice ones. And I looked it up and I turned, it turns out it's, it's kind of not one of the nice ones, But I didn't really need it. So much blood to those balls so much. Can I tell you how much money Jenny said she would spend without telling me $8,000, eight

[24:00]Grand. She said eight grand. I said, why didn't you spend eight grand without talking to me? She goes, yeah. I was like, so eight, $8,002. She's going to check in with you. Yeah. Right. What a lie expenditure or not? Well, she does make three times as much as me, but I did talk to her about the amount Of blood going to my balls. So I think there's going to be a little reversal $1.7 million a year. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Rolling going, man. How's it going with you? Good. I was, I had a couple things to go with. But let's just, let's just stay on this topic. I've decided that I am done with rolling suit, rolling hard case suitcases. Oh yeah. Wow. You gotta get rid of them. I am just, they're, they're too heavy. They're too bulky. I am straight up a, a duffel bag guy. Oh, you carry the bag that is carrying the bag. Oh, what are you? I'm going duffel bag into the airport. If it's too heavy, I've got too much shit.

[25:00]You know, don't, don't need to pack them. A duffel bag. What are you going to 10 goals? Somewhere for a week. To be fair, Matt, most of your work trips are a day in. A day or two. It's two days max. Right. But how are you carrying this through the airport? Because you can't put it over your shoulder. Well, yeah, you can. I mean, they've got like shoulder straps for them. They could tuck them in nice, but they're malleable. You can they kind of move a little bit. Yeah. You get a little skinnier, you get a little skinnier, you get a little wider, push it Left, right. Things like that. Nobody bothers you. Nobody's bothering. You know, you're you're getting that into the overhead. I know I'm getting it in. And I think, wow, the bulk weight of you can get some pretty lightweight Ones, right. But you end up filling it no matter what you might as well throw another Pair of shoes in, might as well throw another couple shirts in something like that. That is just, it's a, it's a waste, it's a waste and you're pulling that thing behind You. Yeah. And you're just clanking around and everything. So I've Russell, I've turned into a, a duff or a duffel bag.

[26:00]Now, are you going to be like Russell and spend $950 on a bag listeners at the real number? You'll never know $500, but you like, when you're set, there's gotta be some flights Where you're at like the far end of the airport and you're carrying the duff. You're just, are you switching it back and forth from hand to hand? Cause you're tired of carrying it or not shoulder, right shoulder. But what it got going was that all of a sudden you need to take like a sport coat. Oh wow. To a conference. Yep. You're going to duffel bag, a sport coat. This is extreme. All of a sudden they start selling these things, right? So you probably see like the half day or whatever it is called something. And it's turned into the greatest thing ever. You get your sport coat, get your shirt, get a pair of pants and rolls up into a duffel Bag, put your shoes, all that stuff. And so I've turned into a, I'm a, I'm a disciple of that. The half day bag. The half day. The half day bag. The half day bag. That's also a duffel bag. Yeah. So like right there, so you look, there's a picture I've got that blue one right there.

[27:00]Also $535. So that's how you do it. Man. So I do it. Oh yeah. This is a, this is like $158. Oh, and you can zip up. Oh, I see. You can zip up your stuff in it. So why is this different than just folding up a suit coat and putting it in a Regular into any other suitcase or bag, Matt? Cause it doesn't get as wrinkled. I mean, you can like you do the old thing. Yeah. Where you fold around the shoulders and kind of roll it a little bit. Inside out it, then you put one arm into the other shoulder. But this thing hangs, it's got the hangers, which I like. So you just take your stuff out and put it. So yeah, this is very boring for about 98% of our crowd, but Aaron help me. I I'm, I'm leaning on you here. Yeah. I'm with you. Do you have any idea how to roll a suit, a sport coat to travel with it? No. No. Okay, good. I was like, nope. I don't know how to, no. All right. I never try. I mean, if I travel with a suit, I just do the whole long garment bag and it folds up

[28:00]From the bottom kind of like, and you still have a hanger in there. Yeah. Exactly. See, this one is like that, except it's smaller cause it's a little bit more rolly as it turns Into duffel bag and everything in the middle. So I will just challenge anybody who's a regular traveler, consider duffel bag, consider leaving Your rolling hard case suitcase at home and try a duffel bag. That's the only time you go. For a carry on. But if you gotta, if you're checking down the gauntlet, if you're checking, you're not carrying A huge duffel bag and checking, you're doing a carry on duffel. Right? Exactly. I like it. Exactly. Matt, pick it to me. I've got an expensive travel rolling going as well. This is amazing. You've had a lot of time to think about your life so far. Don't blow this Aaron. We're counting on you. Okay. We're bombing. We need you. This is bombing. Hey, this is a very boring episode. Don't look at me. Don't give the nod. This would have, this is the sweaty balls episode, right?

[29:00]My flight to South Africa via London goes from 9:00 PM one night to 10:15 AM two days Later. What? It is a 30 hour trip. Oh my God. I then have to go there and lift weights the flight back. Okay. 10:15 PM. I land 6:00 AM. Once again, two days later. What? Long flights. These are long travel days on every flight. I have purchased a bed that I will be sleeping on for the 11 hour flight from London to South Africa. I will be sleeping on a bed. Awesome. I cannot wait. I have been looking forward to this. For months. I don't care how the lifting goes. Couldn't care less about hanging out with my wife on a new continent. Now we've been to Morocco, I guess. This is what I'm looking forward to.

[30:00]Home of the longest conveyor belt in the world, Morocco. Morocco? Did not know that. We are really, we're fully into NPR territory now. We are. Are you counting when it goes under two? Like if it's a mile long, that's a two mile long conveyor belt. You know what I mean? Because the belt is two miles. I mean, it's a. The length of the belt is two miles. The length of the belt. Yeah. The length of the belt. The length of the belt. The length of the belt. Yeah. The length of the belt itself. Of the actual, like what you, what it's carrying. Now, where is the longest conveyor belt? Is it in the Hassan II mosque? I don't know. It's just in Morocco. That's all I know. Oh. Okay. Look up that mosque, by the way. It's huge. It's a big one. So you're going to sleep 11 hours. What if you need to sit up or do something? Do you only have a bed or do you have a seat? No. You think I, excuse me. You think I'm paying for a bed and then not using it the whole time? No. You think I'm paying for a bed and then not using it the whole time? No. You think I'm paying for a bed and then not using it the whole time? You know what? You know what? I'm going to have the stewardess bring me. You know what, Rob? Excuse me. A bologna sandwich heated up. Excuse me. I made a cool quote, like a cool fun fact about Morocco and then you just were like, You pushed me on like the more facts.

[31:00]Excuse me. That is a bullshit move. That is true. Like if someone gives you like a fun fact and then you push them, like be like, well, Tell me more about it and they, that's fucked up. I don't like that. Can I say something, Russell? Yeah. You're right. Yeah. But the reason I did it is I wanted to show off that I knew the Hassan II mosque. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to show off the Hassan II mosque. Okay. That's fair. If you're going to show off. I know. See, now I know that when I'm flexing knowledge, Russell's like, well, that's legit. Player A, players knows game. Okay. Longest conveyor belt in the world. The Western Sahara is 61 miles long. I guess I don't know shit. That's crazy. Conveyor belt. Why? Oh, it's a phosphate mine. Let's. Oh. Russell. While you're looking that up, Rob, is Jenny flying coach? What? While you're doing the Delta one or not? So she is leaving for London a week earlier because she wants to adjust to the time change And then is hanging out by herself for a while. So she's doing three weeks. She is doing. Yeah.

[32:00]She's doing a long time. Damn. What in life? She just does whatever the fuck she wants all the time. Oh my God. Can I also tell you guys a sad piece of news, Paul? She makes $1.7 million. I'll tell you that. I mean, right. You want to hear some fucking bullshit. The other day she goes, I'm so busy. Look at my calendar. She shows me her calendar. She was working from 12 to three. I was like, are you fucking kidding me right now? Right. Fuck. Like from 12 to two 20. He's out of there by two 20. I like just creep around so she can sleep. She's working 12 to three. Dolly Parton could never make a song like that because nobody would care. It's hard to find any rhymes. Oh, well really, what rhymes with three? What rhymes with 12? It's hard. Rob. I was going to ask you're doing two weeks in South Africa and I'm excited for you. I don't remember teachers when I was a kid. Like maybe they would have one day off and you'd have a sub, but you're, you're, you're Doing the two weeks vacation as a teacher. Is that even permitted? Listen, I'm begging you. Can we not talk about, can we not talk about this? I do not. I do not want to think of the worst thing.

[33:00]It's named after the worst thing. Work. I cannot think about work because I cannot tell you how much work that's going to be For me to set up me being gone for a week. It's going to be the biggest pain. More work. Everybody's just worked it. How much work it's going to be. You're leaving in like three days. You haven't done the work yet to set up the work. I thought I just asked us not to talk about work and maybe some issues that we have with Work. Okay. I thought we were having fun talking about me on a bed, on a plane. That's crazy. That's like presidential stuff. And you guys want to talk about, Oh, have you set up lesson plans for all 20 classes That week? Robert, do you think the bed is going to be like built for like a middle seat side? Or is it going to be able to accommodate your healthy Lifestyle? When I think comfort, Russell, the first thing I think of his airlines, I'm sure the beds Are so nice and not at all fucked for how much you have to fucking pay by the way. When I looked at the price, I almost died.

[34:00]And is there like a, is there a capsule that you're in or you, are you covered away from Other people or how does that work? I don't know. It's a big mystery. Okay. Cause I'm thinking the same thing. You're thinking Russell. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You gotta be seated. You gotta be seated. So the beds, usually they fold down to a bed. Okay. It's like a recliner chair really. Oh wait. So yeah. So you have a bed, but Jenny's not going to be in the bed with you. It feels like a missed opportunity. It feels like a real opportunity. Well, it depends on how the Ozempic is going and I have a heated up bologna sandwich, please. Just like my dad used to do it. Okay. Yeah. He's loved to hear that. Can you imagine? I pushed the dinger button. Listen, do you guys have any Gatorade? I'm so thirsty for some reason and don't ask why it's so humid and smells like mulch in Here. I think there was a fuel leak.

[35:00]My friend and I just bought this pornography at the airport and I wanted to show it to You. It's the, it's the China WWF. You know, that's the lie. That's the lie. Cause you don't buy shit at the airport. Yeah. I stole, I lifted this. My friend and I stole this porno. Wow. I mean what? Listen. Oh, stealing a porno. That's so weird. Everybody's done it. You know how like drug addicts will commit crimes to get drugs. Yeah. Well, maybe stealing a porno from your friend's dad is not actually that big a deal. Okay. What? How did we get here? Do your students have access to your like cell phones? Cell phone or anything? Or will they like, will you be officially not bugged by anything while you're gone? Yeah, probably. I could say I'm not going to do it, but I'll probably check email because I'll be bored. But it's only when you check, you can, but it's not like people can ping you. But guess who covers for me at work? The other teachers in my department.

[36:00]So they're going to fucking hate me too. Now I'm talking about work. Well, shouldn't they? So shouldn't they already have a lesson plan? Why do you have to, if they're covering for you, why do you have to make a lesson plan? I mean, whatever happened to the good old days of showing a movie. Excuse me, can I use the airplane phone? The nicest sounding phone in the world. I'm going to put an air phone sound effect on this. Hey, don't you have a lesson plan ready to go? Like you teach science, right? It's all the same. If you get like one big, like, well, Ooh, sorry. I forgot about that. Like every 10 years, like what can you use up your big gaff right now on this One? Just don't do lesson plans. Can't really every 10 years. No, can't use that. I can't use that for a little bit, maybe nine or nine and a half years or so. I just want to say this to you. I teach seventh grade. You think anybody wants to come? You guys know 12 year olds, a group of them. I think we need to delete this part.

[37:00]Okay. You want to come sub for them? No, no, exactly. And now you got me talking about work again. Somebody might Dom for them. And then we was going to sub for them. Can you like, what's that called? I can ball torture. Okay. Rolling, going, Aaron, how's it going with you? It's going okay. I've, I, I texted you guys about this and I wanted to tell this story a little bit more Clearly. I, I got my golf clubs back from Minnesota finally. So they're here. They are next to me in the garage. Which I'm, I think it's going great. Hopefully Rob, the sound is good. I'm really enjoying, recording in the garage rather than the laundry room. Nice. Sounds way better. But I had my, Hey, this is me from a airplane phone again. Sounds great. Love it. Sounds just like me on the airplane phone. Thanks. Yeah. Got my golf clubs back from Minnesota. And I do, as I mentioned, I do, want to, join the night golf outing again, once Again, as I did last year. So I've been trying to, I been thinking, I should probably do it again. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[38:00]I think I should work on my swing. So last week I went to the driving range and took Wallace with me. He actually does great. Like we rented him a couple of clubs. He's doing great at the driving range, but this seems like a major could get hit in the Nuts possibility. Yeah. Oh, a hundred percent. But it turns out I'm actually the really dangerous one. I don't know how I managed to do this, but it happened more than once. Like started off at the range got a couple of hits. I mean, I'm not a big fan of the range. Like we rented him a couple of clubs. He's doing great at the driving range. But this seems like a major Could get hit in the nuts possibility. Yeah. Oh, 100%. But it turns out I'm actually the really dangerous one. I don't know how I managed to do this, But it happened more than once. Like starting out the range, You know, got the big bucket of balls. We were doing fine. I was starting out with the four and five iron, Just like trying to like ease into it, Work on my swing. That was all going fine. Like the ball was getting off the ground. I wasn't doing anything crazy. And then of course, As like, I know this is what happens. I'm like, well, I'm feeling pretty good. I'm going to get the, I got this driver in here. I didn't even know I had. I got to get the driver out and see what I can do. Yeah. And it's pulling out the driver on 17. I don't know what I did exactly. Oh no.

[39:00]But I had it. Is he okay? Hi, maybe. And no, fortunately Wallace was in like behind me, But like, I don't know what I did, But it's a double-decker driving range. So I was underneath the covered part. Yeah. And the, like I hit the ball And the ball went like straight up into the air. And ricocheted off the roof And then into the like stall in front of me. Aaron has lied one and put it into his neighbor's range. Aaron has hit literally the impossible shot. And the guy didn't like bad an eye. So I don't know if he didn't notice Or if he was just trying to be kind. He noticed. But a tradition unlike any other. He was thinking, so I was like, Hopefully he's stoned. I'm not sure. So I was like, well, maybe this guy's stoned. He doesn't know it's me. I had to try again. Like, well, I gotta see what I can do with the driver. At least three times, like I hit the driver And I heard a sound next to me And I don't know exactly where the ball went. And at no point did the guy ever turn around and said,

[40:00]Hey, fuck, I'll stop hitting the ball. So he was either extremely patient Or this has happened before or he was definitely stoned. But I had to go back. This is Jim Nance from 17 at the Oakland driving range And Aaron's being a fucking idiot By hitting other people with golf balls. The guy walking with Aaron on the driving range Is now ordered chili cheese fries. And he's taking a break and eating it with his glove on. Boy. So I had to go right back to the eight iron And then at that point I didn't hurt anyone. So I don't know exactly. I didn't think it was possible To hit a golf ball as badly as this, But I definitely still have some work to do If I'm going to be ready to not embarrass myself. So you, the first club you swing is a four or a five. I think five. That's crazy. Yeah, I'm either a driver right away Or like a nine pitching which just to get moving. Okay. All right. I mean, I just struggled so much with the driver. I was like, let me try something else. And that was all working fine. Have you tried going at like 60% speed?

[41:00]So it's like my whole goal is to just, Hit this floor as straight as I can. I've not tried that. Is that the thing to try? Aaron is hitting it out of the rough And turn off the cameras. He's pulling out the big Bertha. Then you can even do like a three quarter swing, right? So you're not going all the way back But just go back halfway and through. So you're just working on your, Just the motion. See, this is what I need. This is what I'm here for. Just the contact is all you want a solid contact. Okay. You know, forward. I want to remind you we're sponsored By Big Bertha Golf. We put two balls in the hole. Big Bertha. I'm going to keep trying, but I did. It was great. We had a nice time. What is the golf event? How much time it got? It's usually in December. So I think I got, Whoa, you got a lot of time. And it's all part of it. God, that's, don't you want Aaron's life? Did you hear what he just said? The golf event is in December. Fuck me. Aaron, are you somewhat nervous to like, I don't golf a ton to Matt. You said you've been golfing more. You're looking for people to go with you, But I don't golf enough to where I feel like

[42:00]I could be bad enough where I could ruin somebody's round By just constantly putting it into the weeds And slowing the game down. Aaron, are you nervous at all about like, Cause there's very different levels of bad in golf. And if you're bad and you, You're slowing the whole team down, Then it kind of becomes too much, right? Yeah. Oh, last year I was definitely like, I was, I think I told you guys, I was like borderline, Like this guy should not be here at all. So my goal has been to like at least, Because we played a, we played best ball or scramble Or they called it a shamble Cause it was like somewhere between best ball and scramble. And it was a nine holes of par three. And at no point did we use any of my shots. So my goal is to at least use one of my shots. Yeah. I just want to contribute one to the team. We call that the Steve, that's Steve. I have to say that's all I'm going for. The Steve, that's Steve. Eight, no, Steve, Eight, no, Stevie Schaeffler, wherever his name is, right? So I don't know. Hopefully I'm allowed back in the Montclair drive. Aaron is on 16, taking off his shoes in the sand trap.

[43:00]I do like barefoot golf. That's pretty. No, no, stop. We got to do this. Stop. Aaron, we're having fun. You understand that? We don't want to talk. We want to get this podcast over with. I didn't do it. This is boring. I'm trying to be boring. If my brother hadn't gone to bed an hour ago, He could vouch for the golf maker shoes off. It was very fun. That guy's high. You want to talk about somebody who's high. It's the barefoot golf guy. That's not like a tournament. That's just like your way to like, yeah. What did we talk about, Aaron? I mean, this is a foot stuff guys. I'm just going to say it again. It's a foot stuff. It's... Aaron, of course, he struggled today At the driving range, but... You guys know I'm the last one going now. We've never done this before. Now I'm the last one. There's no one like this. We can do the whole album in Jim Nantz golf. This goes on until Rob's... Russell, I'm just going to say one thing. We've been golfing on like Friday mornings With work people who don't golf Just to get them out.

[44:00]People who want to golf and stuff like that. And the worst thing about it is the pace of play. That's... People aren't good at it. I try to be nice to be it, but I'm like, Look, you can go... You don't have to wait for me right here. You can go over there and you can start swimming. And I tell them it like, non-stop. But I think that's what I've struggled. There's so many things in golf People don't want to mess up other people's games. If you suck, you are... People who suck at golf are so paranoid About doing stuff out of order, Not doing stuff right, pissing off people that are better. Being a bad golfer is a very stressful thing. It is. And I try to tell them like, If I'm closer than you and you're close to the meat, Putt, like go ahead. You know, I'm trying to like just tell them like, We're here to golf. We're not here to like take 17 hours. And it's the biggest thing people struggle with. But to your point, they're all nervous about it. Yeah. I wouldn't know. I wouldn't know, I'm great at golf. The thing is, Aaron did struggle today At the driving range, But he once again came in first place

[45:00]Of humiliating himself in front of his son. If you remember a couple of weeks ago, It was bit by a tiny dog. Then the son punched him in the nuts In front of all the neighbors. All right. So let's get to the album. Remember that voice, but we got a few weeks to go from, Let's talk about the album. What? This is a music. Music mic? Let's talk about some music. About the best episode, Rob. I think we're getting one after this one too, Don't you? Oh, lock and loaded. We need magic mic 69 to call in and rate this one. Thank you. Maybe a scale of one to 10 or something. If this one came to the ranch, How much would it charge? You know what I mean? Listen, we are talking about Run DMC. 20 bucks in an order of nachos. We are talking about raising hell. Run DMC from Hollis Queens. We got DJ Run. We got DMC. We got Jam Master J. Reverend Run is Russell Simmons' brother, right? Yeah. So that's how they, obviously

[46:00]They were signed at Def Jam. And basically they had a lot of Def Jam, right? Am I right there? I think that's right. I think, okay. I think you have two Def Jam albums in a row here. They've got lots of singles Until a song off King of Rock Was the first hip hop song ever played on MTV. Run DMC is this enormous, Doing this research, You realize that Run DMC is this Enormous groundbreaking rap group, Which makes sense when I say it, But you don't realize it. 1985, they're in the movie Crush Groove, Which Russell Simmons made about his own journey Into the music business. Okay, they're there with Curtis Blow, The fat boys, New addition, LL Cool J, Sheila E, The Beastie Boys, They're all in this movie. They get bigger from that. Now on their next album, They team up with a guy named Rick Rubin And they who had just come out of an LL Cool J album, They work on this album. And basically what they said was, He said was, I want to cross you guys over. I want to have a hit that everybody's going to love. You should rap over Walk This Way by Aerosmith. This is after they've done most of the album.

[47:00]And they go, no, we're not going to do that. And they goes, okay, we're going to bring in Aerosmith And you can do it. And Run DMC said, that sounds like a terrible idea. We'll never do that. But then Steven Tyler comes in And he's like highly caffeinated Because this is Steven Tyler after his drug rehab. He's after his drug rehab. So he is now fresh. He knows that his career has gone in the tank. By the way, after this, They released Toys and the Attic, a great album. Okay, so they're fully coming back. This brings back Aerosmith too. And so then they do this cover with Aerosmith And it becomes huge. This album blows up because of Walk This Way. I remember getting played a ton on MTV. I've seen that video a hundred times. Such a great video. Oh, you can picture Steven Tyler Coming through that wall. I mean, that's just the way it is. And basically this album goes crazy. It's the first ever platinum hip hop album. It's peaks at number three on the charts. And in 1987, it was nominated for a Grammy Award, Making Run DMC the first hip hop act ever

[48:00]To receive a nominee for a Grammy. They say this is the beginning of the golden age of rap, Which includes Beastie Boys, LL Cool J, DJ Jazzy Jeff And the Fresh Prince and Public Enemy. How have we not heard DJ Jazzy Jeff And the Fresh Prince yet? That's a good question. Yeah, because we really should be here In brand new folk. I don't know if they're on here or not. That's a good, that's a great question. Let's listen to Raising Hell. And I gotta say guys, I'm mostly songs. I just started at the beginning Because I think the beginning to these songs are so good. Peter Piper. Now, Russell, what is this song about? We talked about this once before, didn't we? We certainly did. Because they are talking about obgoblin And the like, right? Oh. They're talking about Flockler. What was it? What did you mix up fairy tales with Russell? What was the bit? Tall tales or something? Tall tales. Tall tales. Yeah. He is not rapping about Pekos Bill.

[49:00]Okay. I think Pekos Bill. We did this song on a list on the clash. And it was. We had Run DMC Peter Piper Sly and the Family Stone Everyday People. Digital Underground Humpty Dance. Orangey. Yeah. Annie May. Madonna Lucky Star and then it was Nazareth Flight Tonight. Wow. Perfect song for the night. At the beginning of the podcast I want to remind everybody with the Humpty Dance, Humpty Dumpty is never an egg in any part of it. That is something that the man Is trying to push on you. Don't fall for it. Humpty Dumpty is a person. I'd also like to remind our listeners, The Humpty Dance is the song That we talked about as a group. And then Rob did a separate show with John Where they forgot that we talked about that song. I would never do this. Wait, you listen to that? Never heard it. I've talked to some people lately And they loved it. Oh, really? Next up, it's Tricky. A song made famous for me, by the way, Sued by the knack for my sharonah,

[50:00]For Bob and Lehtar. Because this was on SSX Tricky, The Xbox game, which is the only game My wife has ever gotten addicted to. In college, she would play this hours a day. She finally had to say, I can't play anymore. I'm stopping. It was a snowboarding game. What do you think you put the most time Into in your life? One of the college footballers probably was just sad College football is high. I mean, I had a run in freshman year of college With a golden eye that would probably rival A lot of people, I would say. There's the cradle. Russ playing the cradle. I mean, I beat that. That's a top 10 moment of my life, I would say. Aaron saw me run around the dorm afterwards. That was tough. You made it. It was so funny. Find something back in the original Nintendo, Maybe like Super Mario Brothers 3 Or Mike Tyson's punch out. Otherwise, I was always behind. It's like the golden eye people, Maybe we'll probably talk about this before, But I'd try to go play Russell

[51:00]Because he'd say, come over and play golden eye And I'd just get my ass kicked. And so it was like, no fun. So I just stopped. Where would you guys put, It's interesting you said that, man, Like where would you put yourself, Like where would you rank yourself In terms of your friend group? When it comes to video games, Were you guys top half, top 10%, bottom half? Or would you put yourself realistically? Russell knows this about me. Why would you ask? How good you are or how much you played? No, like how good were you? Like if you sat down and played like the game That all your friends played, Are you the one winning or are you losing Or where are you at? You know what the problem is, Russell? I grew up gaming on a computer. So using mouse and keyboard to like aim guns and stuff. And when I had to go to Nintendo 64 controller, Which looks like a fucked up sex toy, You know what I mean? I could never figure out how to get that thing To move around. It had three things with three joysticks and a trigger. I could never figure it out ever. You never got those thumbs working right, did you? I got my ass kicked. I was getting slapped up and down. Forget about it, Russell. I'm a lower quartile.

[52:00]I'm in the one far end of the diagram. I mean, Russell's played in the video games with me To know I'm butt naked last. There's no question. No, I don't think you're butt naked last. I don't think that's true. I got to say, I'm not going to talk about How much I've played video games, But I have pulled up my daughter's Sims account. My daughter, I want to remind you, is in 10th grade. She is 16 years old, I think, soon, maybe. She has played this game for 1,600 hours. Whoa, how many? The Sims. She is building houses. She's putting together families. And you know there's a chance she just got dumped When you come home and she's playing the Sims Because it is her self-soothing. It is how she deals with things, Is that she makes family. And the crazy thing is she's so nice to her Sim family. She never sets the kitchen on fire And then erases all the doors. She never puts them in a pool and then takes out the ladder. She loves her Sim family and she treats them really well. And as a dad, it makes me think, hey, I did a good job. Rob, that sounds very familiar.

[53:00]It turns out the upstairs roommate Was very into Sims for a long time. Wow. And she had, I don't know enough about it, You create your community or whatever. And she lost her phone when we were In the Dominican Republic. So she lost her whole team Or whatever you call it, community or whatever you call it. And then she got a new phone And then something happened with that. So she has lost two Sims That she has put in like the 1600 hours on Or something like that. Terrible, just terrible. You know what game I used to play all the time Growing up was Sim Ant. Where I was an ant and you could walk around And get food and then like go back to the Ant Hill. What? Okay, moving on. My Adidas. They got $1.6 million from Adidas As an endorsement deal. They say it's the beginning of hip hop fashion. Are you guys Adidas guys? Do you ever have the Adidas shoes, the Adidas pants With the black and white pants or not? Yeah, I rock the superstars in high school, yeah. The closest I get is I've been known To rock an Adidas tracksuit.

[54:00]Bold matching colors. A matching suit? Yep. And I went to the vet once And the dog next to me was wearing The exact same matching Adidas suit. It was crazy. It was kind of devastating mentally. Next up, walk this way. This is the first, they're the first hip hop group To make the Billboard top five. I don't know about the My Adidas song, But if you take the Peter Piper, It's tricky in this song here. It's hard to argue that this song Shouldn't be higher on the list. Like these, this is 80s rap, isn't it? Or 80s hip hop or this is epic music. You throw these three on. I think this has gotta be rolling. This has gotta be higher on the list with those. And they hold up pretty well. They're still on the list. It's a great front four. I think we're gonna hit a little dip In a little bit of a fun, fun front four. And I gotta say, it's our second album in a row About going down on them often. Yeah what? I've never listened to the lyrics on that

[55:00]And I read the lyrics looking for my opening quote And I was like, ooh, this is pretty bad, isn't it? Yeah, there's some runchy stuff in there. When I did the list of horniest bands, Russell Aerosmith was right at the top. You got Whip Out My Big Ten Inch. You've got songs like this. Lovin' An Elevator. All that stuff. Is it live? It's a lot like the Beastie Boys. I know it's the same producer and stuff, But I love the different voice textures That they bring and the timing. I think it's just, it's so good. And to think that this is, what, 87, crazy. Yeah, I don't know who influenced who Between them and the Beasties, But it's very, you're right, it's... Remember the Beastie Boys covered in their songs? We did License Ill, they covered a Run DMC song. Okay, right. Perfection. Yeah, I listen. This slow beat.

[56:00]I bet recording this was a blast. Doesn't it just sound like... Oh my God, I'm a fun man. No, they just got a great beat and they went in And like, they were crap. There was no other, like, for a while, it was just them. It's crazy. How many, have we done one other Run DMC album? No. We've done none. We've done one, right? No. Yeah. None? Perfection. No, we haven't. No, we've done Curtis Blow. No, have we? We did, who was the earliest hip hop, early hip hop we did? It was... Public Enemy was pretty high. Eric B and Rakim was really high. Yeah, that was the other one. Public Enemy is number two, right? On the list. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, Eric B and Rakim was pretty high. I forgot about that. Good call. Perfection. Did I play that? Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so, okay, walk this way. Nope, hit it and run. I'm not doing that bit again. Don't make me do it. Have you guys ever hit it and run? Have you ever had like the car accident And just been like, oh man, I can't get away with this?

[57:00]I saw guys do that at my high school Where he was fucking next to us, this football player. This guy was the most unlucky guy. Now I promise this story, okay? We found out that he ate ass in high school. No. And we made fun of him relentless. No, no. He was crazy. And looking back, we're like, why? What? Why are we like just bros lifting up bros? This guy comes up next to my friends and I goes, Hey, Fokers, and then just peels his wheels, Just smoke flying up. Peels his wheels? What's that? That's what people say, car guy. I'm kind of a car guy, okay? Wheels spitting out smoke, flies forward Directly into a car in front of him and just teabones it. Looks at us, looks at the car, backs up And then just drives away. And I was just like, what the fuck? What is this guy doing? It's crazy. That was the time I saw that.

[58:00]And then when I saw my Jeep, I was walking out of the bar After a high school get together during college With my brand new Jeep Wrangler Parked right outside the bar. And my dad said, hey, don't park it in the parking lot Because a drunk driver might hit it. So I parked it out of the parking lot. Now, did I park it directly Where cars are coming out of the parking lot? Right in that, you might say line of fire. And then did another guy peel his truck out right next to me, Hit my car so hard that it flew around 180 degrees, Broke a wheel off, And then his license plate got lodged in the car. And it was nine months before that Jeep got fixed. Famously, of course. Maybe one of the answer was no. I was gonna say, yeah. You gotta give us a chance to answer. Two months after that, of course, That Jeep famously was stolen With the three bags of garbage in the back And a bowling ball that looked like a grenade. So it was fixed. So that all did happen and it was fixed? Yup, and then it came back and was immediately stolen. And I was like what? After the Miata and this, I better just get a sensible automobile. Lame, that was the beginning of the end right there. Raising Hell.

[59:00]I'm sorry, did anybody else commit a hit and run? I should have let you guys answer it. No, no. King come king, we must break the king. I'm down with this. And I will break the king. You got one of the vocals here. Were you guys Raising Hell in high school? What's the most trouble you got into in high school? The king is me. You used to terrorize an underground house, Remember kids? We would do like go egg it, Pour syrup all over the windows, that type of shit. Just regular youth nonsense that when you look back on it now Is like borderline terrorist stuff. I, one of my favorite activities When I was in middle school Is I loved terrorizing substitute teachers. I treated them like garbage. Once in art class, I took clay and I just got it wet And I would just throw it at the wall. And it would splot real big and just stick there. And then of course, AC who always had to take things too far Takes a huge piece of clay, Throws it through the roof tiles, Goes over the wall into the next room,

[1:00:00]Threw down the roof tiles and falls. And so we all get in trouble Because the teacher next door has a huge piece of clay Fall down into her classroom. I don't know how you ended up at military camp or school. So then after I graduated from college, I was a substitute teacher In the Minneapolis school district for a year. It goes around, comes around. And it was one of the worst experiences I've ever had. It would be like kids hiding in the bathroom. Although one time I did take a class outside for recess, These were like fourth graders. And I said, hey, how long's your recess? And they were like three hours. I go, okay. So then we were outside for recess for two hours. And finally the principal comes up, mad as hell. Cause I would work at a different school every day. Nobody ever saw me again. I had so many keys. They would give me keys And they would never return them to the office. I had like 10 pair of keys by the time I was done. Pairs, sure. And the principal comes out so mad and goes, What are you doing out here? Your recess is two hours? What are you thinking? And I go, well, that kid told me it was three hours.

[1:01:00]She goes, what the hell? She drags that kid inside. I was like, yes. The perfect crime, The dumbest substitute teacher in the world. I would just act super dumb. And everybody was like, oh, I would take naps in the rooms When the kids were like music class. I would put my terrible time in my life. And tell finally Minneapolis South High School to them, Thank you for two weeks. They did hire me as a Spanish teacher. So I taught Spanish for two weeks. Salute. Yeah. And then they said, okay, You need to leave for a couple of days And then come back Cause we're not going to pay you as a full-time employee. And I said, oh, okay. And I never went back. Just no showed. Yep. Fuck them. They're trying to screw over a union worker like me. Fuck the man. Hey, I don't think so. I am El Nino. That is Spanish for the Nino. Do you think I showed the movie Mariachi Where he pulls on a machine gun of a suitcase? You know I did. That was Spanish class, baby. Ay, ay, ay. That's the one where the kid said, Danny Trejo one or Robert Rodriguez? Yep. That's the one where the kid said, Hey, I said, put that phone away. And he goes, my dad's the gang.

[1:02:00]He's going to come beat the shit out of you. I said, well, tell your dad I get off work at 3 30 anytime, anywhere. Well, I only work half days. So at 11 30, I was sprinting across the parking lot, Looking over my shoulder, running away like a coward. You be ill and listen to where he is in the beginning. How do you wrestle? It's a song about being in Kentucky Fried Chicken. That's how much the world has changed. First thing he's ever had. Yeah, it used to be sort of, I think we used to have hope, jobs And pride in eating at KFC. Now we got no hope, no jobs And we can't even drink the regular Coke Without being embarrassed about it. Wow. Dress it up, dirty it up. Better text my friend, Mike Penis And see how he's doing. That joke is going to catch on pretty soon. A lot of people are actually texting about it. They like it. Dumb girl, hated this song weren't anything. So we're skipping it. Great. Son of Bifurde.

[1:03:00]Kind of fun. Bad boy style beatboxing. Man, are the bad boys on the list? Let me check that. Proud to be... I laid out it. If they are, it's like fat boys And then Marvin Gaye or something. That's what they would do. Proud to be black. Fun. And I'll tell you what, You read the lyrics of this. It's like a great encapsulation Of like black civil rights history For the great beat in the back. Love it. They tell you right out. It's a serious song. Yeah, 100%. But I got to tell you guys, That album had a lot of pace in the beginning. Four bangers coming out of the gate. Just like Aaron had a baseball game. They ordered four bangers,

[1:04:00]One mash. It was British Aaron first. Just inside a Coke. And a fluffy, You got a fluffy Coke. Shepherd's pie. That's no joke, man. I was like, Shepherd's pie, It sounds gross. And then it's just mashed potatoes With meat in it. It actually is gross. I was like, that's what I made when I was five. Put the steak in the mash. Potatoes, good to go. Put the lime in the coconut. Bring it all up. Wow. And then I- Stir it all around. And then I went to the bar to cheat on my wife Because of a classified ad in the paper. Oh my God. Would you believe what happened when I got there? She was the one responding to the ad. Had a good laugh about it. And then we drank pina coladas. Do you guys not know that song? Do you guys? I'm confused. Rob, I'm going to give it a rolling. Well-toned. Wait. Oh, I was just going to do a bit real quick Where if RFK sang the pina colada song, I think it would sound like this. If you like pina coladas. Where's the lyrics?

[1:05:00]I could look up on them. Put the lime in the coconut. Those aren't the same song. Oh, I think it is. You might want to double check this. It gives me an idea. You put the lime in the coconut And put it all together. Put the lime in the coconut. If I don't get a strange piece of ass, Every day I get a migraine headache. Real quote. Look it up. Listen, we don't care about the album. We care about the list. Is having those four bangers to start with. And let's face it. It's a juggernaut of 80s rap. It's an amazing album. It's that 209. Does that seem just right? Because that would be what we call in the biz A rolling well-toned. And I'm hearing it more on the streets these days. Or if you didn't like it, That would be a hashtag rolling groan. Excuse me, sir, we're going to land. We need you to put your bed up. Your whole bed's rusty. Bed stands up in the tone. I don't know what caused that.

[1:06:00]Listen, or do you not like this at all? Is it rolling groan? Or it should have been higher. It shouldn't be fact this far. I mean, we've listened to bands that are just like this. Rolling bone. Did it get boned? Aaron, what do you think? Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan? Run DMC, raise in hell. I think the first four songs make it. I think it's an important sound, important band. They're in the right spot. It is rolling well-toned. Russell, run DMC. What do you think? I'll echo Aaron. The three of the four first songs are all timers. To me, this is like the epitome of rap and hip hop At the time, at least from what I know From like a commercial success and that type of thing. This to me is rolling bone. I think it should be higher on the list. These are those are like three or four epic songs and hip hop. This needs to be higher, way higher on the list. Samantha, rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan? I think this is rolling well-toned.

[1:07:00]I have to admit that Walk This Way is kind of like my purple rain. Like the fact, I just, I don't like the song. Like I don't like the gimmicky mixing of everything. I don't like the, there's one other song in this album That has like a very heavy guitar riff that just, I don't, it turns me off, I guess. So because Walk This Way is on there, I think I have failed to come back to this more times Than I should, but I love everything else about it. I actually, my Adidas, I quote my Adidas all the time, Russell, I, ma adidas. Every time there's some sort of Adidas ad Or something like that. That's probably pretty gimmicky too, But I like that gimmicky thing. So I don't know, I love listening to the back half Of this album. I think it's very timely. I don't know, it kind of brings you back To 80s hip hop, if you will. So I think it's like the quintessential 80s hip hop.

[1:08:00]I don't have to listen to the gangster rap, NWA stuff, I'd rather listen to this And Beastie Boys if I'm gonna go back to the 80s. So I like this album. I think it's probably rolling well-toned right here. I gotta say guys, I think this double tonnet has been fun Because to go from Lil Wayne to run DMC, It's kind of crazy, right? Cause it's like, yeah, it's cool. It's really cool. Aaron, don't yawn into the mic when you're talking. We gotta act like we're having fun. We are having fun. See, I love it, Aaron, you're so good. Unfortunately, you guys are incorrect. Shit. No way. This album gets a rolling down on a muffon. Oh no. Oh. That's why those muffins have those paper panties. What? Yeah. Don't you guys think of those as panties, though? Like the Reese's, you're saying. Well, no, a muffin. It's got the paper on it. You gotta take off those. Next up, Matt liked that one for the record. I just wanna say for the record Because this is gonna get lost in time. We're not gonna remember. Matt loved that joke. He liked it.

[1:09:00]He did. If somebody out there liked it, Feel free to text in. You know what, I wanna say, I was listening to one of our episodes a few weeks ago And it was when I had missed a week and I came back And I did my setup for low Mr. T Tim, the tool man Taylor And I audibly heard Matt laughing in the background And it made my year. Oh, I can tell you, when I see a waveform When I edit it and Matt laughs, I'm like, This is a good one. This is a good joke. I'm keeping it in. He just, you gotta earn it. When you get one with Matt, it makes you feel good. It's true. Next up, we're so much like Mike Tyson Because we have another box set, three CDs, 53 songs. Box set. I fucking hate this podcast with the heat of 1,000 suns. What? We've got Birth of Soul by Ray Charles. Oh, another like collection And by a box set of Ray Charles. What are we doing? I'm gonna go and look in the mirror

[1:10:00]And then smash my head into it. I'm hoping to do that. That's my joke. I got it. No way. Guys, are you gonna pull an eight minute airplane ding dong Before our finals? One of this time or not? Russell, I can't. I can't do an eight minute airplane ding dong. Well, that's actually a pretty good bit. I like that. But will there be a funny joke at the end? I mean, the real move would be no funny joke at the end And see who makes it. That's what I was gonna do. But now, Russell, you said that is this a double cross Where now there is actually a funny joke at the end. There's only one way to find out. Hey, there's only one way And I might have put it two or three minutes in this time. So you got to listen to the whole thing to find out. Russell. Yes, sir. Screwed up the timing on that. Russell, God, don't take your backpack outside. It's raining. I shouldn't. Yeah, that paper mache, it's just gonna go It's a nice bag. Everywhere. The old paper mache joke. Paper mache chase case.

[1:11:00]Even Joe might quit the podcast after that. He might change his fantasy football name After that joke. We cannot be getting a phone call right now. Hello. Hello. Hey, stewardess baby. I just wanted to see if this bed is safe for me. No, I doubt it. Also, I need to use the phone. Call my favorite podcast. Popper. This is what I'm gonna put on the other phone sound Where it sounds bad. What? Hello. I did it again, Russell on the plane. What'd you do, Popper? I doubled dribbles. Oh. And right now I got to race a whiteboard behind me. It's been zero episodes since we've made A double dribbled joke at the end. That would be a shame if we did that For the next 370 episodes. Oh, there's so many episodes left.

[1:12:00]Don't worry, the next one is a box set of Rachel Arles.

[1:13:00]We didn't do a golf joke at the end, Russell. Oh, that's a miss. I'm still recording. What do you want to do? The big Popper baby. I'm actually above looking down from the plane And I think it's just gonna be fine. This is a handmade plane, it's an experimental plane. Nothing has ever gone wrong. The big Popper today is wearing his red victory shirt Nike-style Tiger Woods and his Chantilly lace slacks.

[1:14:00]Tiger Woods normally hits the four iron first Of the driving range but of course his wife Did destroy his car with it earlier today So he's not able to utilize that on the range today. I'm not about these guys cheating on their wives When they get rich. You're not just fucking someone in a motel, You know what I mean, Jim? You're taking them to the nicest of hotels And for a chili's hostess, Like the one Tiger Woods fucked of course, Even though he knew everybody was watching him, That was just simply too much to resist. Jim in the hole, as they call it, Hit it in the hole. Just like Russell's old backpack, Tiger blew her back out. As you know, that lady also was very friendly With Dave Grohl and Arnold Schwarzenegger, Look both of those up. Oh, just getting word now that Tiger Woods did.