Metallica: Metallica (1991)
[0:00]In 2020, four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums. Actually, there is a gong on this Metallica album, if you wanted to start a sub with a gong, please. Oh, that is true. This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music, excoriated the order, and led us to make it this podcast. Listen, I've already gotten in trouble tonight for being too loud, okay? And I have live proof of it that I will be playing later for you. We are far from experts. We promise to do almost no research. All opinions are... What's that? Did you get a hamstring cramp when you were being too loud? Yeah. Are you a loud lover? If my kink was getting yelled at by my wife, all week I would have some creamy jeans. I'm just going to say, that's all I'm going to say. That's all I'm going to say. Okay, kids, fast forward 15 seconds if you're listening to daddy's episode. Shoot, I should have said that earlier. I'll put that earlier. We are up to album 235 and from 1991. We have the album that makes us act like saying, enter light was a normal phrase that everybody's like, it's not.
[1:00]It took me years to figure out he's saying enter light. It never made sense to me. Who's ever said enter light? This is an album that I sing along with so loud and I probably know 60% of the words, maybe. And I sing loud anyway. I'll tell you, half the lyrics are, yeah, yeah. Actually, Rob, you were saying this multiple times. I believe it's enter night. Yeah, exit light. Enter night. It's exit light. Exit light. No, exit light, enter night. So I kind of, not to be a rule follower, but. Wow. If there's anything that I've stared at in so many classrooms in my life, it is the exit light. I cannot tell you how many exit signs I've stared at in various rooms. When I've been in the world's most boring meetings of all time, I'm just like, oh, this is the worst. I'm looking at the exit. Is it red? Is it green? There's so many exits out there. What's your favorite exit, guys? You know, there's only one exit that can be the favorite.
[2:00]What's that? Exit 69. North, Northfield, Minnesota. Exit 69. Where would that be, Matt? It's going down 35 in between. 35 it's where, it's south of where 35E and 35W meet. For the first time. But then you get down to Dallas and there's 35E, 35W again. It goes around Dallas. So there is two 35E, 35Ws. Matt, how do I get there? I live at the big steer. How would I get there? I'm eating so many hash breakfast stuff. What was their big, what was the thing at the big steer? That was a truck stop by our college. What was their big meal? It was like the hash brown. I believe that was, the meal was the lounge lizard special, Rob. Was it really called that? No. No. You got me, Russell. You had me on that. I don't remember any. I had meals at the big steer, but I don't remember any of them. Russell just sent me a text saying the lounge lizard special was two day old tuna fish, Sandwiches, Russell.
[3:00]That's, I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. It's too much. Can you imagine if one of our friends would have gotten a handjob at the truck stop by Saying, oh my God. If you had to guess which one did, which would you pick? Oh. You can't pick one of us. You got to pick someone off, but you can't use their first name. Refer to him like it's some sort of story that only we will know. Okay. Miss Makeupson. I mean how many times we skipped the big steer to go to Perkins? Like we were like, there's a local establishment. We're like, no, we need to go get moons over Miami's or whatever. The tremendous 12th. Yeah. We didn't go to the big steer till almost like our junior year. And then you're like, oh, this is only a five minute drive and it's right here. Right. And it's like, oh, greasy stuff. Oh, I love it. I love a good gas station. I'll tell you the clear Lake combined gas station restaurant. Have you guys been there? They've got the giant donuts. They've got the. They've got giant sandwiches.
[4:00]Clear Lake. Clear Lake on 94, a little north of like, Rogers. That would be called Nelson Brothers, Rob. Oh, listen, when I brought Suzanne in from New York, I touched her at my Clear Lake Island. I've never made that place. We stopped at Clear Lake, Minnesota and got some, big sandwiches and they were. Did you stop at Clear Water or Clear Lake? Cause Clear Lake is the home of McDonald's meats, which has one of the greatest beef jerky of all time. Clear Water has the big, uh. Big exit. I know which one you stay. So Clear Water is 10 or up off 10 or off 94. I'm going off 94, man. You know, I'm getting off Clear Water. I'm going over to Clear Lake cause I do get on the. Play the maps. Somebody around here knows they're. I do get over to 10 that way though. When we have a guy's weekend in Minnesota, I need a beef jerky tour of his favorites. Well, there's a couple. Yeah. Listen, McDonald's. McDonald's is the OG for me. Cause my grandparents used to have a, like a trailer on a little lake up there and we'd Go to, we'd go to McDonald's. We'd go to McDonald's. We'd go to McDonald's. McDonald's meets every time on the way to grandma, grandpa, Bill and grandma roots cabin
[5:00]Up there. Can I just tell you, Aaron, I went on Craigslist and signed up for a beef jerky tour on there. And I can tell you, it was not what I expected. The beef jerky tour on Craigslist. It was honestly, it was most, mostly Russian bathhouses. Is there any worse place to get jerked off by a strange guy than a bathhouse? It's so hot in there. It's so humid. I can barely catch my breath. I got a new one last week though. I did go to, I went to a bachelor party. You guys didn't care last episode, Rob. He didn't care about any of my things. I went to, so we went to a bachelor party and we stopped at the butchery of Maple Lake. So we were up in Annandale. We stopped in Maple Lake at the butchery, which had phenomenal wild rice Brats for lunch. They were great. We got some beef jerky too. Now, Matt, do you know anybody who used to work at Maple Lake? It's a retroactive rolling going. No. Yes, you do. You do. Me. You worked in Maple Lake.
[6:00]Yes. I was a teacher there. Working at Maple Lake. Isn't that the one where you didn't show up for the first time and they fired you? That was Richfield. You guys, I cannot do the chronology of where, right? I swear Rob's been teaching for- Let's do it. Let's go through right now. 20 years and he's taught in 25 places. You almost worked at Richfield as a student. You almost worked at Richfield. Job number one. No, Richfield was my student teaching where I did not contact the teacher. I showed up and stayed half the day for a teacher's in service. Asked the principal, excuse me, where is this teacher? And they said, he does not work here anymore. He does not work here. And also, who are you and how did you get in here? And why are you eating so many deviled eggs? You brought them. Why did you bring them in and eat them yourself? That's an awful lot of paprika. Then I get my first job, Aaron. My wife and I are living in Uptown. Where else would we like to live? And this joke, by the way, if you're not from Minnesota, this joke is not going to hit. Where does my Uptown big city wife want me to come get a job and live? Minnesota, the Canadian border.
[7:00]The furthest from Uptown possible. That is where, Aaron, now listen to this, guys. I went up with my dad and bought a house. Yeah. I bought a house without my wife. I picked a house without my wife. I did not know you bought a house up there. It was a little house on the prairie type shit where I was like, fuck this. I'm doing this myself. You guys can come out when I got sod on the ceiling. Yeah. And then my wife taught with me up there and I said, listen. I'm a professional teacher. I've taken classes at St. Olaf where I mostly paid attention. If you need help, please ask me. She instantly was a better teacher than me. She got lots of credit and it was an absolute nightmare. Then I went to the Iron Range. And that's where the graffiti was dedicated to her as well? That was where somebody wrote in the school bathroom, Ms. Blank has big tits and I want to hold them. Oh. Which again, was a classic. Also the bathroom, by the way, where it said, one sign said, look up.
[8:00]And then when you looked up and said, why are you looking up here? The joke is in your pants. Oh. A classic. If you could go back, there was no cell phones back then. Cause that's how old we were. Well, maybe there's cell phones then, But I don't know if there's camera phones like take pictures and you could Take a picture of that graffiti on the, And then have a blown up photo of that in your bathroom right now. You do that in a heartbeat. Can I just say this? I would lose any of these three fingers right here to do that. If I could go back, I would lose any of these three fingers right here to do that. If I could go back, I would lose any of these three fingers right here to do that. If I could go back and take that picture and have it, It would be worth one of these. Then I was in, then I was there. I was in the iron range for a couple of years. And then I taught. Where, where did you teach? Evelyn Gilbert. Okay. Of course, Gilbert home of the gladiator, The strip club and the gladiator, Which is a classic story I've told in the past. Then I moved to Vermont, Lived up there for a little bit, Had a, That was of course a classic story where I did not have a job and I took my kids To the beach and all the women started talking about their menstruations.
[9:00]Anytime I got too close, so they didn't want to hang out with me. That was a rough one where you took your kids to the orgy, right? Well, okay. It was pre orgy and an orgy broke out after we were there. After you got the kids out of there. Well, yeah, mostly. I mean, I kind of had my, I backed up really slowly. Can you imagine backing a car from a party and just see people and I hate to Describe this to you guys, but it's just flesh on flesh. Hey, carnal delights. And you're backing up with the lights. It's going in. I'd be like, what the fuck? Where have I gone wrong? I hate having kids. Although if I was in the orgy, they'd probably be like, Hey, Can you just hold the camera and don't point it down as your dong? Like it's a first person thing. It's not a POV. Matt, give me a high five for that one. Matt, what were you saying by the way? Oh, what? Then I went out, I live, I went back and taught in my hometown. And that is of course where I worked with the English teacher who all he had in His office was pictures of senior girls. Taped towards the room. That was cool.
[10:00]That was very cool. By senior girls, you mean like older women? Yeah, I do. And they have to be from Mexico because it was senior girls. I don't know. I didn't put the tilde. That's my bad. That's funny. And then now of course I work in, New York and my life is a Living hell that has never going to change. When was Maple Lake in there? Yeah. The whole point of the story. So the listeners could have seen Rob's laugh at that. Oh yeah. That was after the iron range for a year. I hated that job. That was the job where I had a, I got observed by a math teacher and I had to Solve math problems on the board. And she was like, what the fuck are you up to? And I was like, I don't know. X equals X. I mean, get out of here. Now, listen, Russell, stop trying to extend this episode. Okay. It's not because we're just doing a single the night that I'm talking so Long. Let's get, and just, yes, it is. Yes, it is. Okay. Yes, it is. Matt just wants to do it. He wants to ensure you got to get that buffer at the beginning and to
[11:00]Make sure. Okay. Here we go. Ready? No, I'm listen. I prepared for the other one too. We can do death function. I prepared. We're set. I've got to listen to everything. You're breaking. Oh my God. That's just what my girlfriend said to me. You're breaking up. Yeah. She was a trucker, Russ, and we were over CB and she went out of range. We're going to, we're going to, we're going to break up at the big Steer. We're going to break up at the big steer. We're going to break up at the big steer. We're going to break up at the big steer. We're going to break up at the big steer. We're going to break up at the big steer. There's a man driving fast down 35 W. He's got a sweater on. Listen. Okay. Don't think I haven't thought about my life as a trucker. Okay. Roaming from town to town. What would be your, would you do the hawk when I drove By and asked for the big hawk or not? Absolutely not. Russell against the regulations. Cannot be doing the hawk. Okay. I'm eastbound and down. Okay. But I am following the rules. Let's turn on K Rob K. R O B and see what's on. Maybe it's a song that somebody worked on and got yelled at by his wife
[12:00]About. We get to the trip and the woman goes, okay, everybody tomorrow, We've got a big hike. So make sure your water bottles are all filled. And then you brought your electrolytes from the packing list. I'm not reading a packing list before I go on a trip. I am a teacher. I am in charge of the trip. Don't have any electrolytes. Guess what? I don't need electrolytes. I'm a world fucking champion. Almost within the first hundred yards. I realized. There's a problem. There is a problem. And the problem is my body. This is like trying to turn a Ferrari into a taco truck. You know what I mean? I can't do the work. I am for sure. I've drank all my water. I've drank the water of the teacher that I'm with. And my hamstrings are terrible. No electrolytes, Russell. This turned out to be quite a large mistake. Both hamstrings cramp up. I have to lie on the ground. No. Just go. And my co-teacher is stretching me.
[13:00]Look at me in my black linen pants. He's stretching me around by a 62-year-old Spanish teacher that did the same hike I just did. And it's doing just fine. We'll do a hike. It'll be fun. You'll be sweating in the hot, hot sun. We'll begin. We'll ascend. Now we're hiking. Can you feel it? You'll have fun. Then your legs start cramping. Oh, yeah. And your hamstring is tight. You're back to light. You need electrolytes. You start to barely stand. Now your legs are cramping up again. When you want to hear about the greatest out of all time. John Friedin is. You can actually hear where Rob, like Metallica, went away from his previous thrash metal albums.
[14:00]And is now in his pop, more pop accepted phase. You can hear it. Heavy pop. MTV ready. MTV ready songs. It's true. I'm not hating. Me putting my voice over that karaoke track sound totally normal there. It didn't sound weird at all. It didn't make me wish I'd spent more time maybe mixing that a little bit. I've got Russell, Minneapolis. Russell Hart. How are you doing? Rob, judge not. Let ye be judged yourself. Wow. I've got Matt, Minneapolis. Matt, how are you doing? Good. I just want to say that the host of this episode, he tries to please them all. This bitter man he is. Wow. It's not. I'm not bitter. Okay. No, you're not. It's just things haven't gone how I wanted in my life and I'm furious. But I had like 10 seconds to look up a lyric and that's the first one I saw. There you go. Oh, Rob. I also had to say, you labeled me. I labeled you.
[15:00]So I dub thee the main host. He says I dub thee unforgiven. I always thought he had done the unforgiven. I think it's I dub thee. I dub thee. That makes so much sense. I dub thee unforgiven. I'm going to learn. I'm going to learn a lot tonight. I'm going to learn a lot. Russell. I dub thee unforgiven. Label me, label you. Russell, does Matt own a label maker? What do we think? I'm going to say no. Matt does not own a label maker. Maybe his wife might be kind of crafty. Maybe she's got something. I'm going to say there is one in the house. Okay. Aaron, what do you think? Does Matt own a label maker? I'm going to say yes. Matt owns his own label maker. There's more than one in the house. There's 100% chance Matt's house has a label maker. That baby's getting put up. I guess that label's all over the place. Matt, do you own a label maker? I personally do not own a label maker. Yes, my wife got some sort of Instagram. Instagram thing or something or Amazon
[16:00]That allows her to do something on her phone And then prints it out real nice and pretty. She really got it for like a kid's stuff For like school and everything. Yes, there is a label maker inside of my house. Can I tell you, I cannot go on Instagram at work anymore. The Instagram reels that pop up in between the posts Are now simply too dirty. It is simply too much. It is just women kissing women in the kitchen. It's terrible. I thought you couldn't go on Instagram anymore Because you're too busy on the sports betting site Texting your sports betting friends And you just don't have enough time In between your sports betting and classing To look at Instagram. Although I have been doing that at my desk recently at work. Just opening up the app and blazing bets. Oh, I know. Just don't care anymore. Is there a lot of sports betting going on That I don't know about? No, there's none. And then it's fine. And we don't have a bunch of systems That were working and now aren't working. I'm curious how that happens. I'm telling my kids like, Listen, some guys do five years of high school.
[17:00]That's fine. Okay. These tariffs are killing your dad. All right. The losing is the exception that proves the rule. I paid $1,000 for this General Tso's chicken. That doesn't even make sense to me. All right, listen. And I've got Aaron out in California now. Aaron was recently dating a girl Whose kink was flash freezing. His penis. Yeah, they broke it off. Oh, hush, little baby. I wish I had to edit it out What I had to edit out last week. Aaron, I'm so sorry to interrupt you, But I wish I had to edit it out The part where we're making fun of your penis. Let's make fun of my penis. It's never happened. No one has ever made fun of my penis. I don't know, man. There's a lot of stuff I'd quote from this album. Can you believe we're talking about this album? Like, why even talk about it? Let's just play the whole fucking album. Play it in the background. It brought me back to the weight room in college. That's for sure. Now, sixth grade. I mean, MTV, the whole thing. Let's get right into the voicemail.
[18:00]We got one. What's up, everybody? People call? People call this show? I just remembered what our voicemail is. You guys got to give me one second. I will say. All the time, Rob has been saying The voicemail line is full. No, you don't talk over this. I didn't realize that. I was going to say, I know the upstairs roommate Occasionally has left a voicemail or a Bex. We might not be getting those much anymore. She is now on delay, Four or five days in our podcast Because she literally listens To like 25 different NBA podcasts. Like every NBA podcast And every Timberwolves podcast. How is she feeling about this first round Against the Lakers? What's her take? Rob or Aaron, I can't tell you Because she was upstairs recording And watching the end of the Atlanta Hawks. Miami Heat. Jesus Christ. Hey, Russell, I hate to say this, But I think it's time to break it off. That's okay. It's not like you might be dating Russell is simply dating A younger version of himself. You know what I mean?
[19:00]Like he's dating young Russell. We used to watch a lot of basketball. Oh, Russell, I got to admit. Amazing. I hate to say it, but it's pretty hot. If I came home, my wife was watching The playoffs and be like, This is a play-in game. I'd be like, oh, these jeans. Recorded, records it. Yeah. Calls me to say she's going to pause it At six minutes to go in the game Because it's a good game And we should watch the end together. Wow. Wow. Russell. This song, what the fuck is this song? She wants to share it with you, though? Yes. That's very nice. That's very nice. Yeah. What are we waiting for, Russell? What are we waiting for? Yeah, come on, Russell. Yeah, it feels like Checks all the boxes. I'm going to need a better Prenup negotiator, Matt. Oh, Russell, just sign the prenup She's giving you. Don't be offended by it, Russell. Just sign it. Come on. Okay, don't. Now, here's the deal. Wait, you're hitting me with a prenup? I'm hitting you with a prenup. We're going double prenup. We're prenuping. You can't prenup me. I'll prenup you. I was out with, This was probably a year ago.
[20:00]I was out with the roommate, Some of her friends. We went to a few bars And some of the friends had, Some friends in the group Had been recently going through Some divorces. Oh. Multiple. And these people were, They were talking about All the money they were going for And all this stuff. I was like, oof. Oof. Nope. Scary stuff. Not a good conversation. No, Russell's like, okay, How do I change this conversation Away from this topic? Because this is- How do I get the money? Yeah. And Russell said- Turks and Caicos. Do you want to have a threesome? No. Ha. I've put all the revenue From this podcast Into a living trust That we will be Joint beneficiaries for. In the Cayman. Russell, there's one way to do this. I know one guy That did it this way And he is no longer married. Take this with a grain of salt, But everything was fine. Everything was fine. They were planning the wedding, You know, Have everything going About four days for the wedding. Here's the prenup. Wow. Sign it or I'm not getting married. Whoa. Kind of a thing. So
[21:00]Then it'll get signed pretty darn quick When she's pot committed. Yeah, Russell. So- Get her ass, Russell. Did he make her pay for the wedding too? Because then he'd really have her Over a barrel. Right. Wow. Yep. This is such a fun way To think about marriage, Russell. Speaking of divorces, I was reading about this album That three of the four band members Were going through divorces During the recording of it. And it made me start wondering like, What would one of our episodes be If all three of you guys Were going through that at once? I mean, it would have more commercials Just like this had all the commercial hits. I would be sharing it To my personal Instagram Thinking that this is going To give me some dates. You know what I mean? Like, it's time. Just like, listen, Just like Russell's with somebody now Who watches the NBA, I got to be with somebody Who listens to this podcast. That would be step one On my dates, Russell. I would give them a copy of my podcast, Have them listen to it, See what they think. Remember, it went back In my dating days, Rob. I did share that the podcast existed And there was- There was one really bad experience Where I told her, I actually played Your Michael Jackson song
[22:00]For Thriller. And she asked about If we talked about All of the real stuff With Michael Jackson. I said, we didn't really do that. The podcast is more meant to be fun. And that was the last time we went out. We've got, guys, I have to tell you, For the first time ever, We have a Beckline email. This is an email To beckdidbetteratgmail.com. I had to sweep away the cobwebs. Okay, I had to get in there, Kind of clean it out. Okay. Was it your junk? When was this sent? When was this sent? This was sent, Believe it or not, April 9th. Oh, okay. Our Becksters are sliding Into Rob's DMs. And here's a little clue. This was sent at 6.38, 1 a.m. Okay, so who would send A text to this? Guys- Oh, it looks very long. It's- Thank you, Russell. Now, Let's play this voicemail. Let's see how much We want to get through. Hi there. Greetings from Spain. Oh. Long-time listener And first-time caller here. I'm one of the dumb shit listeners
[23:00]Who's been following you Since the very beginning Without really understanding All the inside jokes, But enjoying the podcast And doing- What? The music quest with you While I work out at the gym. Wow. No. Okay, so first of all- What? This is a guy in Spain. I'm assuming this is a guy- This is a real person Who started listening. This is a real person Who is listening to the podcast And working out. Ay, wow. ¿Cómo estás with your life? What is going on? You are in such a deep, Deep place of pain That this is motivating you To work out. ¿Cómo estás with your life? That's our t-shirt. We all have a t-shirt. That's going to be the t-shirt. Can you imagine You're in Spain. You listen to this podcast. You go, yep, This is the one for me. I'm going to listen to this. At the gym. I need some motivation At the gym. ¿Cómo estás with your life? Oh my goodness. Okay, here we go. Sometimes I will just Laugh out loud And people will look at me, But I don't care. Wife swapping will always remain One of my favorite things And one of my favorite bits Of the show. And I miss Russell's Dating advice corner, But I'm happy that he found Love upstairs. Now, in a parenthesis,
[24:00]Not said there was Dating a pregnant woman. That was hilarious. So Russell, You're dating a pregnant woman, A.k.a. The human submarine, A.k.a. A motorcycle In a sidecar. That story has made it Across the ocean To a different country. Somebody has listened to that And now knows you For dating the pregnant woman, Russell. We are like Pitbull. We are like Pitbull. We are worldwide. I stayed for the whole day. That came out Within the first 15 minutes. I mean... He's a gentleman. We went to the Copperhead. Copperhead's probably The best brunch spot In Minneapolis. I had to stay. What am I going to do? I'm not going to pound That Moscow mule. I was suspicious When she sat down In the booth. She went... I don't remember Lamaze. I don't remember the breathing. I did the... I did the class For the first kid. And by the time The second kid came, We were like, Man, we're good. And to be honest,
[25:00]It was... It was fine. Second kid slid right out there. It was crazy. It was like a bobsled. Now, Let's keep going here. We missed our birthing class Because my kid was... Wife swapping. You missed your birthing class. God. He was born the day Before the birthing class. I was like... Who is the birthing class The day before? Like, shouldn't you do that In like a whole week's... He was four weeks early. So, he was supposed To do the birthing... You're playing that shit Too late. If your kid is born Before your birthing class, You fucked up already. Yeah, I know. That shit is too late. We tell them that all the time. What were you doing, man? You should have waited Four weeks. Aaron's like, Don't take any breaths. Oh, my God. I didn't take the class. I don't know what to say. Hold it in. Just hold it in the breath. Yeah. Okay, the baby's coming in. Oh, I didn't take the class. I don't know what's going on. Pull. No pushing. Pull. Why can't this kid Change my diaper? I got to go. That's what I said At my... All right. Let's get back To the email. Wife swapping Will always remain
[26:00]One of my favorite bits Of the show, And I miss Russell's Dating advice corner, But I'm happy That he found love upstairs. Yeah. I also need to say That you guys hate Most of the music I love, Which gets me so frustrated Sometimes. Okay, so... I mean, respect for... Yeah. Not everything is working. He does think We're doing some drivel. I want to know Who he likes, though. Does he say who he likes? Let's see what he says. I also need to say That you guys Hate most of the music I love, Which gets me So frustrated sometimes. But it's an interesting Take on the different tastes Between different world regions, So I guess this means That you need to add me To the list of potential Co-host candidates. There we go. So I could counteract Your musical arguments. Hee. Great job. Great podcast. I never thought you guys Would make it so far, But now I'm sure You will get to the end Of this quest, And I hope to be there, too. Okay, so... Oh, yeah. That kiss of death Right there. Why did you bum us out With that part? I never thought You guys would make it, But you're going, And I'm going To. So this is just A regular person, Like a regular human Who found us
[27:00]On the internet. I gotta know What his music tastes are. We gotta play Some of his music So we can figure out If we actually do like it Or not. I mean, have we truly Hated anything? I don't think we've... I don't know. I guess some things we... Listen, Richard, Thank you so much For listening from Spain. I can't believe you do it. Again, I... Guys, what do we think About going international? That is our first International email, And I gotta say To all our... American fans, You're kind of out back. We're kind of leaving you In the garbage bin. We are now international. We're past our American fans. Sorry. Do you guys think He's been listening Over like a year period, Or do you think This has crammed Into like four weeks And like he's gone From a 1 to 2.30 In a month? He says following Since the very beginning, So... Wow. Maybe he's been doing it For five years. Right? Five years? Yeah, five years Almost this summer. I'm sorry. I will be quieter. Keep it down, Rob. What the hell? Damn. Guys, that reminds me. I forgot about this bit.
[28:00]Listen to me singing And she catches me Singing too loud And comes out. Listen. You can see If you can hear her At the end here. Hey. That's what it sounds like. Play it again. One more time. Okay. Hey. Okay, so that was... The only... One more. If you do it one more time, It'll be three times. The only other... The only other time We've played three things Is the Russ jacks off To cryptids. So do it one more time. Hey. There we go. Rob, is there a way To slow that down Like 50% speed? Can you... He's getting yelled at again. She's looking at me. Oh, you're... No. I think she could hear you. Well, don't look back And then you won't know That she's there. Just keep it going. Just stay chill. Can you play it At 50% speed? She got something going on. Going on tomorrow or what? I cannot play it At 50% speed. Aaron, don't ask What she's got going on tomorrow. That's not part of the problem. The problem is
[29:00]I'm a bad person. Oh, Aaron, you just... She's... Okay, so can I just say this? I just have to say this About my wife. On Friday, I came home from work. On Thursday, I came home from work. Working all day. Okay? I was going against... How many classes did you have? I was going against An automated drill. Okay? And I won. So it's actually Not a big deal. But I was... I came home And my wife goes, I took two classes. I took two naps today. Two naps? How is that even possible? How do you fit in two naps? Two naps? And it was like five. I was like, How does a nap do? Listen, sweetie, I will be quiet. You got to go. You're stressing me out. Okay. I'm sorry, sweetie. Is the fan on? Oh! Okay, turn the sound machine on. This is what happens When you make us start At 945 Central. Look, I tried... I thought earlier was better. Listen. Earlier is always better. Richard from Spain, Thanks a lot. You guys have done A ton of good stuff. I'm in a lot of trouble. Okay. This is totally... Thanks, Richard. Let's do our quiet rolling going. By the way,
[30:00]You're... Apparently, you're... It's time to see What everybody's up to. What's her name? Princess Diana. Got people laughing In the gym, too. Who are these people Listening to this podcast In the gym? Yeah, I can't listen If I'm lifting anything. I'll drive on my head. Erin from Minneapolis Said she was listening. She had to shut it off Because she was laughing Out loud in the gym. So, well... That's great. We're rolling going, Erin. How's it going with you? It's going good. Roughly repeat that. I couldn't quite hear you. Yeah, it's really bad. I don't really appreciate it. You have to talk into the mic A little more, Rob. You have to talk into the microphone Or at least speak up. Enunciate, Rob. Red leather, yellow leather. Red leather, yellow leather. Oh, I'm going to be... Let's hear it, Rob. Really lettering out. It's going good. You guys make me do The big bop, right? My marriage might be In serious trouble. You know what else We got to do? Like, what do we used to do When we said we do like The hard work? The harmony things like... Oh, hello. Hello. Hello. I can't help myself
[31:00]From saying that. Rolling going, How's it going with you? Please, I'm begging you guys. It's so great. Hello. Hello. Hello. Oh, we're going... Okay. My rolling going is that I listen to Bad Bunny now. Oh, yes. Yep. I have a good band Buddy song. I like one. Yeah, I watched his Tiny Desk And it's like, It turns out this guy's The biggest star in the world For real, for a reason. Yeah. Like, his music is good. Oh, really? I listen to a lot of Bad Bunny this week. Oh, the Tiny Desk rules. My favorite is Chambéa. C-H-A-M-B-E-A. Check this one out. I feel like you'd do that On purpose. And this is the perfect Time of the year Because it's WrestleMania style. It features the Nature Boy, Ric Flair, Rob. Give it to me. Woo! Check this song out. This is a badass song. Here you go. I can't hear it. Woo. Woo. Oh, my God. Here we go. Bump it up, Russ.
[32:00]Oh. Tendo. There's Tendo in the video. With buns. Oh, that's Russell. Yes. This is great. Wow. That's him? That's like super young Bad Bunny, huh? I wonder if Richard Likes this one. Who should I ask? I wonder if that was An email from Richard Fleer. Also known as The Nature Boy. Call me Richard. My dad's Ric Flair. I'm definitely a Johnny Come lately to the Bad Bunny. So I've only listened To his newest album. Debe, Titorar, Mas Fotos. And I like the one Called Clove Friend. We don't have to play it Because this video is nice. This is like super young Bad Bunny. Seven years ago. Wow. You know, when thongs Were thongs, That's what this video is. And men were men. Yeah. And you could. Yeah. And the other thing That happened to me this week Is that I went out
[33:00]On Tuesday night to go. I texted you guys about this. I went out on Tuesday To go watch the Warriors And I was at the bar And I was at McNally's Down on College Avenue And it was pretty Not too packed in there. Just people out Watching the Warriors. So I was like, I mentioned to Anna like, Oh, hey, the trivia guys Don't want to go out tonight, But I might go out by myself And watch the Dubs. She's like, you should do it. So of course, That's the dream. Oh, boy. He says you should go out And watch the Dubs. You go, right? Yeah. So I hop in the Uber. I head down. I even texted one friend. He's like, I can't make it. I'm like, even better. I'll go by myself. So I Watch the Dubs At the bar by myself, Which is fine. And then like people Kind of start filing in Into this back room And like a couple people Come to the bartender And say, Is it comedy night tonight? And the bartender is like, I don't know. The guys usually hear Like eight o'clock. I'm not sure. So it seems like There's going to be A comedy open mic. So I'm excited about this Because I'm like, OK, this is like, This is like I got to Go and check this out Just for us. Aaron's got a good Aaron's got a good Five minutes of jokes. He thinks he heard Me say before. Yes, right.
[34:00]So the Dubs End up going to Almost 10 o'clock. So I'm seeing people file. Aaron's like his opening line Is I just want to gain Enough weight to fit in With the other co-hosts In my podcast. All right. I It's super distracting To talk over bad money. I feel like Ghostface Rapping over Lala Means I Love You. So I, I see people filing In and out of Of the back room. And, And so I think like, OK, when the Dubs Are over, I got to go check it out. So I, I go back there After the game is over And a guy who had been The most insane, There were like some Borderline bad calls That whatever, There's bad calls In every game. The guy who was going The most nuts About the bad calls, Like demonstrably Crazy about bad calls Is on stage. Stage in quotes. And he's doing Like COVID humor, Like, Oh, I had my kids Home with me For remote learning. It was terrible. And it's like, No one, This is not funny. In California, That doesn't really fly, right? It just isn't funny. Like nobody wants to hear
[35:00]Jokes about COVID anymore. Like, no. So that one was over. So I sat and I watched Like three or four people At no point. You should see me When I go to work. I wear my pajama pants When I'm sitting On the Zoom call. Yes. I stayed, I heard like four Or five people. At no point Were there any more Than four people In the audience In this room. There's people On a tiny stage With a mic And the audience is, And so finally At like 11 p.m., The guy who's hosting The thing Hands me his, Like he packs A nice bowl of weed And hands me some And that's great. And so then I'm in, I'm in this like Serious backroom Comedy shit. And the guy, Another guy gets on stage And starts doing crowd work And like is, Of course, Picking on me. And he's like, Sir, are you, So what, Are you a comic? I was like, No, I'm just a fan. He's like, Oh, You're a regular person. It wasn't, It wasn't an open mic night. It was like a workshop. I was the only non-comic In the room at all. And so I'm like, You're a civilian. Yeah, I was like, Oh shit. I was like, Is it okay that I'm in here? And they were totally cool. They were like,
[36:00]Yeah, Like that's how we know If our stuff's funny or not. But all these people Knew each other And they were just there To like work on their stuff. They're so fucked If you're the one In the crowd, Aaron. And I've learned this lesson That just because Aaron laughs Doesn't mean it's that funny. It helps when Aaron laughs. It definitely helps. But he's, He is not the most Discerning person. He's very considerate. Now, Aaron, What was the best joke You heard? The best joke, There were two That stick out That I remember. The last guy Got up on stage And he said, He said, Man, I'm up here. I'm only 5'8". And he goes, I'm actually 5'5". I don't know why I lied To you guys About those three inches. And then he was like, You know, I see stuff that's really sad. Like I saw, I saw a child's coffin. It's so sad Because I thought, I'm going to have to be buried In one of those. Because he was like A really short guy. Oh. So that was, That was that one. Oh, okay. Child coffin bits. I texted Rob.
[37:00]Hey, we'll see you guys later. We should send this guy A contract for Netflix. Do we know anyone over there? Wow. Hey, I'm trying to give A good tag on my Coffin bit. The guy who did a Peeing in the shower bit About how like, Now I can't eat asparagus anymore Because I'm always having To pee on people. And he was like, If I, Anytime I take a person home, Like if I take a lady home, The first thing, I do is get in the shower And try to pee on her Because if she's like, Sticks her foot out And is like, Cool with this, Then I know what I'm in for. This is like some raunchy, Raunchy shit. Jeez. Okay. You asked. I wasn't going to do the bits. The worst bit, Yeah, There was a terrible bit. How do you remember All the jokes? I wrote some of them down So I could text them to Rob. Hey, Perfect copyright move here. Different coasts. Yeah. It's all right. Yeah, I'll get them on TV. They were, They were very nice to me. The guy gave me Some weed. I said like, Hey, Is it cool if I'm here? He's like, We're here every Tuesday night. Like, Come on back anytime. So no, I'm going to go check out The backroom comedy again Sometime for sure. Aaron, You're not going back To backroom comedy, Bro.
[38:00]It's just you. It's the one person. It was just me. Yeah. What happened when the joke Was no good? Got no laughs. I mean, Well, They would just be like, Oh, You guys don't like that joke. Okay, I'll try something else. They all had their notebooks Up there with him. That didn't work. Okay, I'll try something else. I can't imagine what that's like. Because they weren't like Really on stage, You know, They were like practicing Or whatever. Yeah. I mean, At one point, Like I haven't smoked weed Out of a pipe in like five years. So I was like trying to figure Out how to light the pipe And burning my finger. And the like, The comic was like, Okay, I'll wait. I'll wait for you Until you're done. What is this place? What is going on? Aaron, Were you like, Don't you guys have a pop can Around here? Right? You can't even get a joint. Just something simple. I don't know how this thing works. Were you in somebody's Apartment by accident? Did you accidentally go Into their apartment? There are apartments Above this bar, But I was not in Someone's apartment. It was a great time. I mean, I love supporting live comedy. So that was, That was a highlight for me. So Bad Bunny And live comedy. How's it rolling going With Matt? Good.
[39:00]Rob, I got a song for you. If you don't mind playing. Sharon Van Etten Has a new song Called Idiot Box. It's all over 89.3 The Current. We play it all the time. It's just a great song. Oh yeah. Russell, I've been saving this Just for you. Oh, Finally. I had a, We don't need to do this, But I've, I've got my new favorite Travel hack of all times. Work travel. All this stuff. So I took a flight, But don't play it over Sharon Van Etten. I don't want to hear this, But don't do it. So I, I went on a one day trip, Which usually means I am packing light, Packing light. I'm going to go as, As a Spartan as I can. I decided that, You know what? I'm going to pack this Roller bag today. And I'm going to bring Something along That hopefully changes My life on the road. Wow. Yes. So I brought My very own pillow For the hotel room. Oh.
[40:00]And it's the greatest thing That's ever happened to me, Russell, Ever, Ever, Ever, Ever. I cannot stand the pillows That are in all of the Residents in and all the Marriott places that I stay. So I decided to just Bring my own pillow And I got a wonderful Night of sleep. Oh, That's so smart. This is, This is some old man Shit, Man. I'm not going to lie. You packed your Regular suitcase And then because you're Packing light, Your pillow also fit Or did your pillow Have its own bag? So I had my little like, You know, A double-sided folding Card suitcase, Right? I put the pillow On one side And all my other stuff In the other. Aaron, He had his bag packed And then he put his Pillow on a stick Over his back And he put a lot of Cans of beans In there as well. He had a five-day Shadow. Excuse me, Sir. We have a one-bindle bag. We have a one-bindle limit On this plane, Okay? Was there any part of you That didn't want to put The pillow down on the bed? We've talked about How people don't want To put their step On the floors in a hotel. No, but you know what? God knows what Rob's Been doing in those hotels. I pull back the sheets
[41:00]Every time And I give that A thorough look To make sure that it's Like clean sheets. Oh, God. I have never pulled Back the sheets And you're so right. What are you going to do? Are you going to leave If they look bad? No, if you stick Your feet down there And there's something Gushy down there, I mean, Forget about it. It hasn't happened yet, Russell, So I don't know, But I think I might Just say, Do you have another Set of sheets? Like, I'll make My own damn bed If you've got a clean Set of sheets for me Kind of a thing. So bringing your own Pillow is your new Travel hack. That's funny And it won't work All the time Because I really do Dislike having Like a rolling carry-on These days. What prompted you To do it this time? Your backpack All the way. Because I've been Saying for a year That I just wish I had my own pillow. I just wish I had My own pillow Kind of a deal And I've got, We always talk about Pillows, Rob, I got my $120 pillow Which sounds nuts But it is unbelievable And it's cool On one side And it's pretty nice. Can I ask you, Matt, Did security wonder At all when you were Bringing through A life-size pillow Of Carrie-Anne Moss's
[42:00]Character from The Matrix? Did they ask you About that Where it was A full-size? Nope. One guy gave me A little bit of a look back But that's about it. But you're not Checking this bag. This is a carry-on So you're not worried If it's not Going through security Where it might get opened And taken. Right, yep. It's going to be with me The entire, I thought about that. Should I just check it? Do I just check it and go? And you made it very clear It's in the bag. You're not holding it Underneath the crook Of your arm. It's not sitting on Like a chair in the airport. It's in your backpack. It's in a rolling Hard-sided suitcase So it's on one side Of the hard-sided suitcase. I shoved it in there And got all my other stuff On the other side, Zipped my other stuff up. Matt, did your wife See this happen? What did she say? What did she say to this? You're bringing Your own pillow, huh? And I said, yes. Okay. Okay. Okay. Normal stuff. That's basically it. Immediately picks up her phone, Starts texting people. Now, Aaron, I have a little tip for you. And Matt, actually. Matt, I got a tip for you.
[43:00]And listen, Don't get on me About the ethics thing again, But I'm just going to say this. What I do when I go to a hotel Is I take the pillows From the airplane. They're fine. I sleep with those tiny pillows On my bed And I feel like a giant. When I'm on a bed, When I'm on a bed With those tiny pillows, I feel like I'm... You're playing on a pillow? When I wake up... Where do you get pillows On an airplane? Yeah. The overseas ones. Yeah, the pillows. There's probably one On your ones to Hawaii You probably had. Forgot that not everybody's Taking those flights That I've taken. Listen, you get a little pillow And when you wake up In a hotel room With a tiny pillow, You feel like you're In Gulliver's Travels. You know, you just feel huge. I mean, it's just for that moment When you wake up And then it's not a good pillow. I did think about taking... When we were over in Ireland On the way out Of the... I did think about taking My pillow. Yeah. You know, But then I thought This isn't mine. This belongs to the airlines. I see where this is going. Rolling, going. Man. Rolling, going. Russell, how's it going to you? I got a couple things. One, I took my nephew
[44:00]To his first Timberwolves game Last week, Which we had a great time, But we went out downtown. Beforehand, we went And got some food. My brother, Upstairs roommate, And my nephew, The four of us went out. We stopped at A restaurant Right across And we were getting Something to eat Before the game And we had a celebrity sighting. Did you get the chicken shots? Did you get the chicken shots At Kieran's? Did not get the chicken shots. What are chicken shots? Basically Chicken breasts cut up Into little squares Or cubes or whatever And kind of put in some Sort of like honey Sort of sauce, You know, Kind of like a glaze Or something like that. They're fabulous. They're very good At Kieran's. Just wondering. Sorry, Russell. But so, We came across A celebrity sighting For our Minnesota fans. It was Channel 4's own Political commentator, Pat Kessler. Oh! Wow! I do not know Who that is. That's good. My brother looks at me And he goes, Is that the guy
[45:00]That does the politics On CBS? And I look over And I'm like, It looks like We pulled him up. It was him, CBS's own Pat Kessler. Now, he is famously a, Well, he's on K-Fan a lot On the Barrero show. And he's very good. He's very good. I like listening When he's on. But he's also, He's famously a huge Gophers fan. Like, travels to all The bowl games And everything. And I think he's A huge sports fan. So, was he going To the Timberwolves game? It looked like he was Probably going to The Wolves game, yes. So, anyways, We went to the Wolves game. We had a good time. But one of the reasons My brother was in town Is we were doing some Cleaning. My mom moved a while back. We're going through And going through A lot of some old stuff In the, In the, Basement and everything. We went through it. We pulled out These folders, All this stuff From when you're a kid. Like, report cards From all The way back then. Every, everything You've ever written, Art projects, All that stuff. I narrowed it down. I kept a couple letters That I wrote about Family members. But everything else
[46:00]Got tossed. All the grades And everything got tossed. But there were two things That I really enjoyed That I came across And I kept. And they were Treasured recipes From each of my side Of the family. So, family recipe books That I thought Was very cool. So, I thought I would ask you guys, Do you guys have A family recipe? Like, do you have stuff That gets passed down Or do you have Anything like that? I've got a, I've got a book That I got from my grandma. It was, It was her sister's. So, she was one Of five sisters. And so, kind of the Whole lineage From those sisters down. It's about a 60-page Typed recipe book. And it's, I got it for Christmas One year, You know, Long, Maybe in 2000, Something like that From my grandma. And I cook stuff Out of there All the time. I made some Molasses cookies Out of it The other week And stuff like that. So, yes. And we've got, Famously, There's a couple Soups and stuff That, Some desserts That we make Every year. So, I'm guessing Are these ones
[47:00]That you still make, Russell? Or are they coming Back to life For the first time? I didn't even know The books existed, Matt. So, but it literally, It's from my mom, One from my dad's Side of the family, One from my mom's Side of the family. When you look through them, Some of them look like They go way back. And others look like It was different people In the family From however many The last 56 years Putting stuff in there. Where they say like Lard instead of butter And stuff like that. There's a recipe For like horse steak And you're like, Oh, this is kind of. But a lot of the ones For the one side of the family Were baking items, Matt. And they had The rules of baking. I thought I would share With you guys The six rules of baking. See what you guys think. Oh, all right. Love it. I want to hear it. I want to hear it. Number one is Be orderly. Be orderly. That's a good one. That's like when I worked, You know what? That's the same advice I got when I worked At the hospital. And also when I worked. I saw that one. Yeah, you saw that one Coming. Okay. It's like 420 in the gaps. You know what? I saw that one Coming out of the bullpen. You stepping on punchlines When you were at that Comedy. I tried not to.
[48:00]I tried not to. It's called woman aid. He's yelling a punchline. Come on. Here's the thing. It's a kid's coffin. A kid's coffin. This is not the kid's Coffin. Excuse me, sir. I have some respect For the punchline. Okay. How about this? How about this? Okay. So you guys think, Oh, you're so smart. This is why I'm Einstein Compared to you guys. Less smart people. Orderly. That sounds like when I Worked at fast food Restaurants testing their Drive-thru mics. Hello. Hello. Can you hear me? I'd like a number two Order. Lee got in these nuts. Oh, Oh, Oh, Russell, what's rule number two? It says use good tools. Use good tools. Use good tools. There you go. What do you think of that rule? Russell, can I tell you right now? Our kitchen's Sets that we have All time low right now. Missing like the half teaspoon thing. Lots of different spoons in there.
[49:00]Nothing matches. We need Multiple spatulas In the last couple months Have broken. We have not replaced them. We are low on spatulas. I think I only have Two pairs of tongs. Things are a disaster In the Rob Hustle. You might have to dump everything And just kind of do a reboot Of that stuff, huh? Come on, OXO. Give me those OXO stuff. I got Like a metal set of Measuring cups and spoons A couple of years ago And it's the greatest thing I've ever got. Best tools for baking I've ever got. Good tools. Got to hand wash them. Don't put them in the dishwasher. It's good stuff. So Matt follows Rule two To the T. To the T. Yeah, so orderly. Oh, oh, Another good one from here. Number three. Choose good ingredients. Yes. Choose good ingredients. Don't tell me what to do. What do you, If you're baking Or you're doing some, What do you have to get For good ingredients? What's the focus? Well, you got to get good butter And you got to know if you, It's probably unsalted, But then you want to have good salt If you're going to put any salt in there. Matt knows better than me. Matt, what are the good ingredients? No, I was going to say Then the butter,
[50:00]You got to leave it out. It's got to get to room temperature. You can't have, You know, You can't just pull it Right out of the fridge. You got to pull it out And either soften it Or let it get to room temperature. And Russell, I'd say if you run out of chocolate chips, Use dog shit. You can use dog shit. It's fine. Actually, I think that's on page 17 Of the, Of the thing. Number, Number four is measure accurately. Measure accurately. What do you guys, You guys measure everything Or you just kind of pinch in here, Drop in here. And I try to measure, But I, My, My cookies, I didn't have enough flour. And that's because We were down to the bottom of the flour And I didn't want to put another, We got another bag up there. I didn't want to put it in the flour. Hold on. I didn't want to put it in the flour. I didn't want to put it in the flour. I didn't want to put it in the folder thing. And so I said, You know, We'll just be about an eighth of a cup short on, On flour. And you could really tell They weren't as fluffy as they should be. Russell, There's only one thing I measure when I'm baking. And that's my tone. When I say to Jenny, Can you please make me some cookies? What are the odds? Rob really uses please in that,
[51:00]In that request. That's easy. Not good. Not good. Would you make me some cookies? Yeah, That does sound like me. Let's just pretend like, Let's pretend like we're in like a gym And you got to yell across it to Jenny. To make some cookies. How are they going? Jenny, Please make me some cookies. She's got the stand mixer going already. Let's go. There's some stuff going on in there. You got to yell over the sound of the appliances. I'm worried she can hear you through the headphones. We're trying. Jenny, Make me some cookies. Make me some cookies. They do give you two, Two don'ts about measuring flour. I don't know if you guys measure flour, But here, These are outside of the six rules, But don't have don'ts about measuring flour. Stems and seeds. Don't dip up the sifted flour with the cup. It packs down again. Wow. Don't. Don't dip up the sifted flour with the cup. Don't dip up, It says. Don't dip up. I don't know. Okay. Don't dip up. And then it says, Don't jar the cup on the table Or wrap it with a spoon while measuring. It causes the flour to settle. They want you to dip down To pick a flour out of the bowl? They want you to keep your flour nice and fluffy. They don't want it packed down. Yeah. Okay.
[52:00]Wow. Don't want you packing it down. You're supposed to keep it fluffy. Number five, Mix carefully. Mix carefully. Mix carefully. I cannot imagine. Listen, When my mom. Jenny, Can you mix that cookie dough carefully, Please? When my mom saw me mixing a bowl of cookie dough And saw how strong I was doing that And had almost unlimited energy To move my arm in that motion. Brought her back to her college days. Sorry. I apologize. It was inappropriate. Russell, That's my kid's grandmother You're talking about having sex in college. Okay. You think my kids want to hear about grandma? Having sex in college? Maybe she was. Anyway, I want to hear about it. If you turn it to volume a little bit. Yeah. The last rule of making that. It says, Know your pans and oven And how to cool your cakes. Oh, Got to cool your cakes. How are we cooling our cakes? I mean, It's put in the freezer,
[53:00]Right? Like what? What are they talking about? Like you got to have it on a rack. Oh, But on the rack. Yep. Got to get a little air underneath it. There were all these recipes in here. I saw one for lemon meringue pie. Maybe I'll have to send it over to Aaron. Cause I know he loves the lemon curd or whatever. Gross. But I was going through the other family one. And I noticed this one also had random cocktails in it. Wow. Some of them were submitted by my mom. It turns out. That's funny, Right? I have a similar, I have, I have some recipes from my grandma who I thought didn't drink. And then there's a recipe for homemade eggnog in there. And it's like, You can use brandy or whiskey, Whatever you choose. Like what grandma? So what are the cocktails? I will give you guys one. Did you make one? I'll give you one of her drinks. We can do the peach fuzz or the strawberry fuzz. I'll give you the strawberry slush, Which you want to hear. We got time. We better go both. Yeah, We got, It's really got one episode tonight. We better hear both. The peach fuzz recipe by my mom. Again, Someone who I have probably had less than five drinks as long as I have been alive. Two peaches with skin, No pits.
[54:00]Obviously she's telling you, Take out the pits. Wow. Sounds like Angelina Jolie. Is she going to smash them? One six ounce can of lemonade. Oh yeah. Okay. Frozen. Right. Wait a minute. Okay. We're talking the freezer concentrate lemonade. Yes. Okay. Now I'm going to ask you guys a question. Do you think a young Rob didn't use a spoon and eat the lemonade concentrate right out Of the freezer? Even though you got to dip up or down or B I, I mean, Rob would do that and it would give him quite big canker sores. I had a lot of canker sores. Okay. Guess which one. Okay. Russell, Go ahead. Sorry. The last thing is six ounces of vodka. And then you're, You're putting it in ice. You're blending it. That's the drink. That's the peach. So you're hydrating the, You're hydrating the lemonade with vodka. Russell read that again. It was a peach. A what? And then two peaches, Two peaches, Six ounces of lemonade,
[55:00]Six ounces of vodka. It's one of these. Yeah. I would assume you're putting in, It doesn't say anything about ice, But no, It says blend with ice. So I'm assuming you put ice in there. That's your water. That's it too. I would drink one of these for sure. Sounds delicious. Russell, I would hammer a peach fuzz. I'm not going to lie. What was the, What was the alcoholic drink that Leo had in North Dakota? Weren't there alcoholic slushies that Leo had? Oh yeah. Yeah. It was like, No, What is it? Hard Mike? Yeah. Mike's hard lemonade. Yeah. It was basically in the slushies. Yeah, Man. I recently got excited cause summer is coming and I was like, I get to go back and use those North Dakota sound clips that I made. Oh, Can't wait. Yeah. But school starts again. In about four months. Fuck off. Seriously. Fuck off. That's not cool. I'm not kidding. I know we got in a fight last week and I will fight you again this week, Man. Do not say that anymore. Okay. I will. I will never say that. Rob, Roll it going. How's it going with you? Listen, I think I found out what the worst thing to hear during sex is.
[56:00]You found this or you just thought of it on top of your head? Well, No, I didn't think of it. I kind of discovered it. Let's say. Okay. I was having sex with my wife and she said, Oh, I have a question to ask you later. Oh, And I was like, Mother motherfucker. You cannot. If I was having sex and I got a work email on my watch and I checked it, That's how this felt. You know what I mean? I have a question to ask you later. And I was like, Oh, Well, I hope that question is how'd you learn to use that dick so good, But I don't think that's what she's going to say. Okay. Do you know what I mean? What? Like you've been married 20 years. She should, I mean, It'd be weird if she doesn't know at this point. And here's the problem guys. I thought it was going well. I thought it was going pretty well. I was proud of myself. I was like this jujitsu right there in the pocket. Huh? My abs are tight. We're both in bed by eight 15 between eight 15 and eight 18.
[57:00]Apparently you have a three minute window because of melatonin is kicking in. Oh, But when she says, I have a question to ask you later, It is, It destroys you. It destroys you mentally. That's yeah. And I do. And the worst part is I do not remember what the question was. Oh, I was hoping I was going to say, What was the question? By the time she asked me for some reason, I was so sleepy. I was so tired. I do not remember what the question was. So that's on me. So did she bring it back up to you or did you say, Hey, By the way, What was that question? That would be so good. Oh, If she brought it up again, You just my homework from when we were having sex. We were talking about Metallica, Metallica, The black album. Wow. Okay. This is there. Aaron, Do you know what album? This is what number this blew my mind. Number five, I think, Right? Yes. This is their fifth album. Okay. And it got kill them all. You got master of puppets,
[58:00]Ride the lightning and justice for all. At this point, Metallica was played on 10 radio stations in the United States. All the four albums before, Because they were so hardcore speed metal, Every album, They were trying to get faster and faster. And they were going, And all of a sudden this is, I mean, How else do you say this? Russell, This is the album where everybody says they sold out, Right? I mean, That's the name. That's, That's the main point of this album, Right? I would say they become more mainstream. They start to have more radio friendly hits, But a part of it too, Is I think a lot of their songs before are like nine minute Thrash. Thrash metal songs. And I think I was reading something where I don't know if it was a Newstead or Kirk Hammett or one of them were saying they reached a Point when they were touring on the previous album and they're playing Like a nine minute song. They're looking out in the crowd and people are getting bored. Wow. This is the same song for nine minutes. So I think more of these songs are a little bit shorter, But they're slower and heavier than trash before. You're seeing like ride the lightning.
[59:00]You're seeing ride the lightning and you're just getting bored. You'd be like, What? Who's getting bored to those songs? I loved them. Now that's why everybody gets stoned. At like the jam bands. Oh, Right. Cause we got the 10 minute jams and you got to be stoned. But if you're head banging for 10 minutes, That ain't good. This they, They pull in, They say, We want to make a more palatable album. So they pulled in a guy to engineer who worked on Dr. Feel good. A guy with the perfect name of Bob rock. And Bob rock goes on to produce a couple albums for him. That's his real name, Right? That is. Yeah. Well, I mean, Well, Robert, Excuse me, Mr. Rock is my dad. Yeah. Call me Bob rock. I love, I love his description of working with the band. He was expecting production to be easy, But he had trouble working the band leading to frequent engaged arguments with The band members over aspects of the albums. Rock wanted headfield to write better lyrics and found his experience Recording with Metallica disappointing. So that's a bummer.
[1:00:00]When you have to tell the lead singer, Hey, Could you do me a favor? Could you do better lyrics? I mean, Are the lyrics that different on this? And then the first four, Russell, You know, Their, Their catalog better than mine. I mean, It's like, It's sometimes cringe in like a dork way. Right. But I feel like that's the kind of their thing. As they're saying. Yeah. I think if you, If you were to look at it, There, There are more songs where if you were to try to parse a meaning, There could be a meaning like maybe more introspective than some of the Previous albums that don't really have that. I think this album, They remixed it a ton of times. It costs a million dollars. And like Russ said earlier, All Rick Hammett and Newstead are, Are all divorcing their wives while they're recording this album. Okay. That must've been crazy. Can you imagine being the one guy, If you're the one wife who's still there, You're going to be like, Okay. And this is before they were sober too. Right. Or were some of them sober? I think this is, I don't, I do not think they're sober at this point. This album has spent 10 collective years on the billboard 200.
[1:01:00]It's the fourth album in American history to spend over 550 weeks on the Billboard 200 with dark side of the mood legend and journey's greatest hits. What a third album to put in there. Journey's greatest hits. And they also recorded this at the same time as guns and roses doing use your Illusion. And James Hedfield will talk about like slash would come over and play and What they're making and Hedfield would play for slash. And I was just like, Holy fuck. Can you imagine being in that studio and you're getting all this stuff and You're like, Oh, Use your illusion sucks compared to your first album guys. Yeah, Man. Just a reminder that there was these, I don't know, Seven, Eight albums that all came out within 41 days of each other in 1991. Let's hear it. Metallica, Metallica, Pearl jam 10, Use your illusion. Guns and roses. One and two blood sugar, Sex, Magic, Red, Hot chili peppers, Sound gardens, A bad moto finger. And then nevermind by Nirvana. All of those came out within 41 days of each other in 1981. Aaron, My dad was at the album and they're recording this and you know what he Said to a slash. He goes, You guys should be fucking dolphins in the video.
[1:02:00]That's cool. That's what people want. Your fans want you to be a dolphin. They're not going to think that's a weird, What everyone wants. Think about the episodes. We've put out in the last 41 days. Like the, The Rob doing princess die episode. Yeah. What other episodes? That's kind of my motor finger on the last 41 days. Yeah. So four of those, Four of those are on this list. Four of those albums now are on this. It's so strange. My wife got a package from sound garden. Cause she got something in the mail from the motor finger company. Huh? The good motor. These illusions are not on the list, Are they? No. So Metallica, Pearl jam, 10, Blood sugar, Sex magics coming up later. And also just so we're aware, I do own this album. We have listened to it on my new clip speaker. It's a, It's, It's got four sides, Three songs on every side. So four, Two records, Four sides, Three songs on every side. Ooh, Let's,
[1:03:00]I got to go through this one more time. So this is the fourth of four that are on the list. This album, Black album by Metallica, Pearl, Jam, 10 Metallica, Blood sugar, Sex magic. I guess we already did that one. I want to do that one. Totally forgot. And then nevermind by Nirvana. Wow. Crazy. So, But this is the fourth one and we're way down. I mean, I don't, Do you think it should be the fourth one out of those, Those four albums? Let's just do a mini ranking. This is a, This is a thousand times better than the red, Actually peppers album. I, I think it's better. Yeah, I think it's better. Sure. Yep. Enter sand man. James Hadfield wrote this and said, It sounded, It was so commercial. And he then made lyrics about destroying the perfect family, A huge, Horrible secret for the family, Which is like, Anytime you interview these guys about these songs, They're like, I wrote the darkest lyrics. And it's like, Yeah, We get it. You guys are dark. These guys are a Bay area, Right? El Cerrito. Yeah. I went to the movies last night, Saw freaky tales, Which is awesome. It's set in Oakland and they played a ton of Bay area music and they played,
[1:04:00]It's set in 1987. So they didn't play any of these tunes, But they played from the belt holes. Cause yeah, Those guys are Bay area. Do you think there's a, I was listening to this and I was thinking of Mariano Rivera and he would Come in and Metallica played this. I think it is retirement when they retired his Jersey, They played out in center field for this, But you know, This was his famous song. And I was thinking if we'd ever done the, You know, The closer songs and we went back, We did talk about the greatest closer band songs ever. And that was the first time we ever talked about the macho man. I went back. Cause I wasn't going to repeat the list, But Rob Aaron, I think brought up a blaster jacks or whatever the, That one is the tiny Tim. I don't even know what the hell that song is. But that was the first time we ever had the macho man show up on the pod. It was the whole episode. And we're actually doing a, We're not gonna do any impressions tonight. So actually we're just going to kind of move on. This is going to be an all time,
[1:05:00]Like top 10 hard rock song, Right? This one says like, So the only kids like this one now, Go ahead, Man. So you brought up Mariana Rivera. You have to bring up, You have to, Because we're all college football fans. Virginia Tech famously has this as they're running out and it is unbelievable. You should YouTube it right now. Google it right now. Whatever. Watch Virginia Tech. Very good. Enter Sandman. Have them watch when the, When the team comes out. It was very similar to when I would go to a St. Olaf basketball game. It was a very similar vibe. Yeah. The music is blaring. Me and the three other guys who were there, For the almost the beginning of the game, We didn't quite get the tip off, But we're there like five minutes into the quarter. We're rocking and rolling. We're saying, Yeah, Hey, We love the threes. Yeah. Hey, Is there going to be a dunk this game? Who knows? Why don't you cheer a little louder? Like you did at the game, Rob cheer, Like you did that. I'm not getting the vibe. I'm not getting the full vibe. Okay. So I am going to move on here. Sad,
[1:06:00]But true. But I mean, Is there a band? Is that the album opener? That's crazy. It is crazy. The beginning of Sandman is like, Is I know Aaron's talked, But the best drop that you know, But that's as good of an opening to an album. Right. Yep. So Bob rock said to him, Hey, Every song on this album is in the key of E. And they said, You know what they said, Aaron, Is it be the lowest note? And they said, Well, Yeah, But we did Dr. Feel good. We did it and drop D. So they dropped this song down to drop D, Which is why it sounds heavier. We heard that with the black Sabbath last week as well. Is there a band that has more of a sense memory for you? Than Metallica? No. I mean, When I listen to Metallica, It takes me back to about three places in my life. Like I remember distinctly when I got in, This was such a strong weight room. Also, We were in like sixth grade when this came out. So like the kid who had the black Metallica CD was like, Oh, His parents bought him this CD and he's cool. And he listened to music loud or she,
[1:07:00]In my case, It was Scott Bailey. But you know, When they were playing that, I'll tell you again, That's that Metallica video where it had the guy of the, The landmine has, And they had that video on MTV. It scared the shit out of me. Yeah. That was terrifying. That video was, That is an all time. One is an all time memory. I think with Aaron, Myself and two of our other roommates in college, We played that. We all, We rocked out in a car. Like we were in a Wayne's world. What's the Wayne's world. Yeah. Bohemian rock. Absolutely. Listen. Yeah. I wrote by this song, This fucking rocks. And then I read that James Hadfield said, Oh, This is one of our sillier songs. What? This is a silly song. To me, This sounds a little more commercial. Right. This is the kind of the first one that I was like, Ah, We're commercial compared to you. Do you guys remember people saying that Metallica sold out? Like people get worked up about that. I, I, I think we're too young. Yeah. I didn't know. They were popular.
[1:08:00]We're like 10, 12 years old for us, But we weren't old enough to know, Kill them all. And we, We didn't know those. So like, I bet in college, Like I probably got into Metallica in high school, Then probably more into college. But I, I like the black album. I didn't like kill them all. I didn't like master puppets much then. But if you listen now, Like I'll say, If you go back and we'd listen to sad, But true, That song is slow as shit. And I could see why the, Like the original Metallica fans here, Sad, But true. And it's just like plodding along. And they're out there. They're early. So it was so much faster. True. I, I will say a load came out in 1996. I do remember everybody calling that to sell out. I'll I do that. I remember, But I liked it. You know, Not so much on the black. I had fuel on it. I mean, I liked it. We saw the load tour wrestle. We will be the reload. I, I only saw one tour of theirs, Aaron. You'll never guess which one it was. St. Anger. St. Anger. My favorite album.
[1:09:00]There's the unforgiven. Now, Of course, Russell, We have heard Rob was that question that Jenny was asking you about that one night about your, Reload. Oh, Are you serious? Russell? Oh, Sorry. You think I'm doing a reload? First of all, Can you, I can't imagine Russell. We'd be up till 10 46. Easy. Do it. There's no other up till now. There's no other song in their catalog. Anything like this. Is there, I mean, Is there anything on the previous four albums that does like the, This guitar sound or anything? My guitar sound is definitely different. Cause that, This comes from like, This is where they do the, It's like the spaghetti Western music. Right at the beginning. And we've heard this before Russell on your songs with sequels list. Cause of course they had the unforgiven two on reload and unforgiven three on a death Magnetic. One of my, Another one of my favorite albums of theirs, Wherever I may roam, This is their fourth single. And this, We were talking about this. Rob pull up ecstasy of gold.
[1:10:00]It's like, I don't know if Rob, Have you met, Have you, Have you guys been to Metallica concert or not? Yeah. I went to that same one. You guys went to. Yeah. So I, Metallica is the band I've seen most. I bet I've seen them like seven, Eight times maybe, But they always start every concert with the ecstasy of gold. Like the Clint Eastwood movie. And it's always an amazing opener. So they do this and then it ramps up, It ramps up and then they come out and then they just start smashing it. Aaron, I was going to ask you though. One thing I was reasoning about unforgiven with that is, Is a lot of people like Dave Mustaine who got kicked out of the band said, This was his favorite Metallica song. Cause it was the first time he'd ever heard Hetfield sing. Yeah. He really does. Normally he's like screaming and everything. He's just screaming. Right. But this is like the one time he was singing and they were talking in the, And I was reading that he wanted to be like Chris Isaac. Oh, It's wicked game or whatever that song, But that was part of the production is like, You've got to sing normal.
[1:11:00]We can't just double track you. But what do you think of Hetfield as a singer? I haven't thought of him as a singer, But when they, When they, When forgiving comes on, You go like, Whoa, He can kind of, It sounds nice. And he's like, It's cool. But yeah, The rest of the time he's kind of just snarling or growling or doing, Do whatever the song takes. But yeah, The unforgiven is totally different. That's part of why it's so striking to me is like, Oh, This is not their usual stuff. Don't tread on me. Now. I always wondered where I recognized the beginning of this song. And they say it's a bar taken from America. The song from wherever I may roam. Did we do the sitar? Where's the sitar? Whoever I may roam the very beginning. Oh yeah. Electric sitar. Is that what that is? I never knew that. Yes. Who's playing the sitar there, Russell? I think it's Hammond. Wow. Ravi. Ravi Shankar. I cannot tell you how high I got Mel B listening to a Ravi Shankar album.
[1:12:00]Holy cow. Number five. Number five. Go for it a little bit further. Two. There's this clicking sound. I was reading about this. It's a 12 string bass. Yes. I saw that. Did you hear that in there, Rob or not? No, But I read that. I mean, The 12 string bass is so it's too much bass. Like, Why do you need 12 strings? That's three times the normal number of strings. Russell. That's a crazy number. What do you do with all those strings? I can't imagine me. Not much. Okay. I can never play it very well, But I bet that kicks ass having a 12 string bass. Oh, So many strings. Listen to this. This is the introduction is a, You know how they copied. Remember when they copied that Bowie song about Andy Warhol and that one solo on Master of Puppets. Oh, It's so good. Yeah. Yeah. They copied the song America from West Side Story on this one. Listen. That's awesome. Right here. Listen to this. Nice.
[1:13:00]That's cool. Yes. Yes. Yes. The Turks and the Jets are going to fucking fight. Yes. Don't tread on me. So good. And now I was reading on songfacts.com on that song, Rob, That a lady said, Should you ever encounter a wild cougar on your travels? You should play. Don't tread on me. And the cougar will run away. Smart. That's good advice. Now we're the best wild cougar fighting podcast. Thoughts on wild cougars, Rob? Here is my hotel key. Bring your own pillow. I've got four, Airplane pillows. We can put under your waist. You know, Can you imagine the height of Matt's dating days? Like he shows up on the date. Like his pillow is in the seat next to him. He's, He's bringing his own pillow and I hate to bring it up again, But he is bringing that Amazon triangle pillow. That's the part he didn't say is that it is one of those sex pillows.
[1:14:00]Helps get the waist up there. What were we on through the never. Reflection on the universe. Rob, You go to like two 20 there. There's some pretty cool guitar riffs on this, But there's also pretty cool solos. Yeah. I just think, Whoa, I can't get enough of this album. I just love it. This kicks ass. Like if I was out riding my dirt bike through a construction site, Oh yeah. Holy shit. This is like, I just love it. I throw it and shit on shit. Oh, I'm off the shovel onto the boards. I'm doing the guys on the scaffolding. They're yelling at me, But I'm going and I'm doing a flip off the scaffolding. Oh, I missed the whole, Like, Is this Metallica jumping the shark thing? Cause I just remember like growing up as a kid, You saw guys in Metallica t-shirts and you thought Metallica was like scary and
[1:15:00]Worship the devil or something. And then this comes out and you're like, Well, They're still kind of scary, But this music rules. And so I didn't know that there was anything like to think twice about, But I do remember seeing them live with Russell. And when they played this stuff and load and reload, It was like, Cool. And then when they go back to seek and destroy or master puppets, The place goes fucking berserk. So like, There's definitely that I was 20 before I really realized the schism between Metallica fans. I didn't get it. You know where I bet you started into Metallica. I'm going to throw this out there. March 8th, 1993. Mission impossible. I think it's, I think it's Beavis and butthead. Yeah. I think that show, Because that's what they would, Wouldn't those guys, They'd sit there wearing the Metallica ACB shirts and watch those types of, That's right. Of videos, Right? Yep. I, I was always the Metallica guys that who had the Metallica shirts at school. Of course they were scary, But the real freaks were the mega death shirts. Yeah. Anytime somebody had a mega death shirt, I was like, It's like Metallica is not hard enough for them.
[1:16:00]Yeah. Every one of those guys became law enforcement somehow. Like every one of those guys are now in the state patrol. It's crazy. Nothing else matters. This is their third signal. Got all the way up to 11. There is no Kirk Hammett on this whole song. It's all James Hetfield, Including the solos. Really? First dance at my wedding. You good one. Is this considered a ballad, Like a metal ballad? Oh yeah. I think so. I think so. Yeah. I mean, This is a crazy. I was reading Rob. I thought you'd think of the kick out of this. August of 2021. This video surpasses a billion views on YouTube. A billion. Rob, I'm curious. What videos have you watched a billion times? I mean, There is, We haven't watched it in a long time, But you would not believe. Oh, Not the guy. This guy who gets,
[1:17:00]Now listen, Russell, He does not want to get the balloon. He does not want to get the balloon. And that is very clear. He does not want to get in there. So let's fast forward a little bit. Cause you'll never guess what happens. He puts the balloon on his head and eventually rats. Can I just be clear about this? He's not turned on by being in the balloon. He's not, He doesn't have an enormous erection being covered in latex as the balloon loses air. That's not his thing. Oh, Oh great. I'm becoming trapped in the balloon. You're right. Oh, He hates this. Darn it. Darn it. Darn it. Oh, How many, How many times have you watched this? I mean, Everything about this room is scary. 44,927. Look at the room in this video. This is how he has the pictures arranged. It's very creepy. It's like true detective shit. I can't look at it anymore. All right,
[1:18:00]Listen, Let's get into a wolf and man. I think the end of the album is still fun, But it's slow. It, It, Wow. All the epics, Everything's like the first eight, 10 songs, Eight songs. It's like most albums. But how could you, How could you keep up with the beginning of this album? I mean, Listen to this. I mean, It's probably a little too long, Right? How many songs? 15? It's too many. 12 songs only, But they're all probably six minute songs. This is a great song. This is a good one. And I'll tell you, They're all great. God, That failed. I like this one too. I do have up right now. I am looking at my Metallica XL spreadsheet. Oh yeah. How many of you? It says every song and every song rated on a scale of one to 10. This normal stuff, By the way, Normal stuff, Average score for the black album and 8.67. Wow. Now, Russell, Russell, Let's just, Let's just,
[1:19:00]Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. We talked about this. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. Let's just tell all the listeners from Spain who maybe don't remember five years ago. This is a spreadsheet Russell made where he, He was going to a Metallica concert. So he took every Metallica album, Rated every song on a scale of one to 10. I listened to the whole catalog and graded every song on a scale of one to 10. Yeah. And we had an average for each album. We heard that and we said, This is a guy we should do a podcast with. They're going to be so short and so nice. Okay. Matters. What's the, What's the lowest rated song by the talent for me or ever for you on your rate, On your rating system on this album or any album, Any album, Any album. I'm looking quick. And the first one that jumps out to me is a song called shoot me again on St. Anger. Oh man. I love this song. I love this album. Seven minutes. Russell. The song is seven minutes long.
[1:20:00]This is a one. I can see that for sure. This is them listening to like corn and limp biscuit and be like, These guys have fucking got a great idea. Yeah. We should be here. You're like, Please sell out again, Metallica. What are we doing? It's beautiful. And just a reminder, All these songs, Including that one, You can see them recording it on their documentary for St. Anger. And it's brutal to watch because they're making this album. They're putting in so much work and you're just like, Oh, I know this is a huge flop. It's probably gonna, Oh, Now, Of course I did, Man. And I don't want to say anything. I did get that documentary on Napster recently. So that's on me. And next up, My friend of misery. After a while, Do you think you started to think that like James Hadfield is just kind of a Bummer. Like he's just kind of bummer to hang around with. Like there's no songs about him doing birthdays or going to a rodeo or
[1:21:00]They're making like the album. They've got like behind the scenes, I don't know if it's when they're making St. Anger, But they're making one of their albums. It's like a, And they had like a therapist with them because they were, This is Aaron when they're getting his head feels sober. He's back with the band. And when you watch the documentary, I should look up the name of it, But there's a part where he, He agrees. I'm only going to work like four hours a day with you guys on this. And so he would leave and the other guys would want to be listening to the Music and he would get, That's my agreement at work too. Cause he, But he would get pissed because they're working on the music and he's Leaving. And he's like, You guys can't be working on this without me. But he was only willing to put like four hours. Right. He does seem kind of like a bummer at times. Do they still tour right now? When was their last tour? Yeah. I was just there. Oh, Right. Aaron, Do you not remember the Russ summer concert tour? I do. Metallica day one. Green day, Day two. Yes. Yes. Metallica back again. Day three.
[1:22:00]Right. Yeah. And then I do remember. Def Leppard. Yeah. Right. And journey. Right. That's right. Steve Miller. They still see. I'm sorry. Yeah. Gosh. Yeah. I mean, You might as well ask if there's a, If there's a buddy Holly tribute show going on in Waterloo, Iowa. Of course there is. Russell's been there. I was sitting right here and I saw ACDC was in town at the Viking stadium. If like a week ago and they had set up like a shop and they had set up a Tattoo shop where you could get free ACDC tattoos at the concert. It made me wonder like, Who's looking for a free tattoo. Yeah. I'm not like, Would you, Would you ever get a free tattoo or would you not like insist on paying For it? Yeah. I wouldn't want to get, I also, I don't understand if you'd go to a concert. I mean, Tattoos take time unless they're going to just do like a super quick ACDC Look. No, It's going to be on your skin forever. I'm willing to pay for that. It would be like planning your birthing class right before the baby's Going to get born. The timing is fucked. All it's off. It's way off. No time. Sweetie. I missed the birthing class, But I got this kick ass. Let there be rock tattoo.
[1:23:00]Okay. It's awesome. And it's really red and I have to cover with a bandage right now. So it's going to be in all the photos of us and the kid, Me holding the kid. You're going to see the tattoo covered up with a bandage. That's on me. What? Okay. I put a sandwich. Nevermind. I didn't go to the birthing class. You're getting, You're getting a little loud. Just keep it down a bit. It didn't go to my wife. I'll think this is funny. If she hears the bit about not going to birthing class. He was born on a Friday classes on Saturday. When does that happen? When does the waitress come by? I don't know. I didn't go to the birthing class. I missed it. I screwed that up. I brought just hot dogs and mustard. No buns. That's on me. I misunderstood. What? What did you think this was? The struggle within. Yeah. Another bummer title. Do you guys work with anybody who's just straight negative?
[1:24:00]Like as soon as they start talking, You're like, Oh, Here comes some negative stuff. Yeah. Oh, I talked to some people at work and they're just like negative all the time. And I'm like, Wow, Aren't you just miserable? Like So many things you don't want to do. Guys, That's it for Metallica. That's it. Black album. Wow. They had a Japanese version of so what, But we're not going to play that. Let's get into the. But like a Miles Davis cover. It was a Miles Davis cover a lot of court changes your pants is cool. Consider me Miles Davis. Oh, I should say this is the two or two. If you remember where headfield famously pulled a Michael Jackson, Ate a big thing of a pyrotechnics right in his face. I had to go to the hospital for a little bit, So he didn't even get any money from Pepsi. That's the, That's the infamous where guns and roses wouldn't come on stage.
[1:25:00]This is Montreal. Where they burned, They burned the city down because GNR would not come on stage. And this is like the bit. Honestly, This is Metallica is opening for guns and roses at this point. That's crazy. And this is where they switch. This is where Metallica goes up and guns and roses goes down. Okay. Right. And you imagine what a caution to her. It is. It would be a bummer though. If you go see him and then just a firework goes right off in James Headfield's face. Although I got to say of all the guys whose hair I bet would be pretty Cool looking at when it's a blaze. James headfield. It's right up there for me. He's it's, It looks like it's maybe carrot tops. Oh, How would you tell? How would you tell you'd go hit carrot fire extinguisher? Oh my God. We've reached the bottom. Maybe there would be those blue flames. Why are there blue flames? Rob? What's the science? Well, It's alcohol burning Russell. Now here's the thing. Okay. This is album. Two 35 on the list. Okay. And again, Does this belong in two 35?
[1:26:00]If it does. Okay. It is rolling. Well toned. It's perfect at this place. If this should be higher on the list, Which of course is a lower number, We would have covered it already. It would be a better album. Okay. It's kind of like a NASCAR. The lower you are, The better you are. Oh, I got one. Normally getting three is better. If you're at the bakery, Getting three better than one. Not if you're Dick trickle, Not if you're Dick trickle, Which by the way, That reminds me Siri, Make doctor appointment for Dick trickle. Oh God. Listen to me. We're almost five years. Isn't this your first Dick trickle joke? Congratulations. I know. You waited this long. Yeah. Well, I don't have to edit out some Dick stuff later. Okay. Have that ripped away from me now. Or is this a rolling? Okay. This should not be this high on the list. Way back. It is a kind of sounds like James. Holy year. The Dow. That would be lower.
[1:27:00]We're on the list. A higher number. Okay. In this case, Just like Amelia's cousin, Of course, Dale number 99. Oh, He was the number eight. I forgot about that. A car number eight car famously. Now You'd think people are ever confused by dealer and art. Wasn't he number three? Was he number eight? Oh shit. He was the three car. Then this joke's not going to make any sense. I thought I already started. Our junior was eight. Earned her junior. I'm looking it up. Hey, That's is that a phone ringing? No. What do you mean? You did it with princess die. There's no phone. I'm not going to do it with the old number three car. I'm not going to do it. Yeah. Here's the number three car. Guys. If you think I'm tempted, What's Earnhardt junior. You think I'm tempted to put Aaron? Her juniors got sued by Lamar Jackson over the use of number eight. What? Read it. Pull it up. That's crazy. They have a lawsuit over the stylized use of number eight.
[1:28:00]Yes. But earn our juniors been eight first, Right? I should have copyrighted that shit. I guess he didn't get to it quick enough. Guess who they're suing now. Me for what I did to my dinner last night, Ate that shit. By the way, Do you think they were ever confused when they said Dale juniors in the eight Car? And they're like, What you couldn't possibly do that. It's made out of metal. Now, If you think I want to have Dale Earnhardt call in with NASCAR sound effects In the background and he has a big Southern, The accent, He'd probably says it really funny stuff. Okay. Like his favorite album would be pink Floyd's the wall. We're not doing that. Oh, What about on the Patriot episode next week? Oh, That's so good. Okay. Oh my God. And I also got to tell you, Talk to you guys about bill Belichick's girlfriend. I don't know when we're going to do it. We got to talk about it. Let's do it now. You got to talk about it. It's crazy. Listen, I'm bailing out guys. Here's the thing. What do we think? Rolling? Well-toned rolling bone or rolling? Yeah.
[1:29:00]Aaron, What do you think? Black album, Metallica, Sorry. I was down the Dale Earnhardt rabbit hole for a minute. He won the race that he died in. Cause he was the owner of the car that won. So he's like his Wikipedia entry says he won. That feels like some Metallica stuff. I'm not going to do it. I don't know, Man, I was coming. I was ready to come into this, Like fully like this is rolling bone. This should be way higher. And I think it's rolling bone. I think we're way down in the two fifth, Two thirties. This is like really fun music. I, I don't know the other, Like, I, I honestly don't know if I like it better than blood sugar, Sex magic. So I, I'm going to call it rolling boned and, And stop yapping at you guys. Cause you guys will have better thoughts than me. And what do you think? Rolling? Well-toned rolling bone or rolling grown? I think rolling bone. I think this album is better than blood sugar, Sex magic. I don't know if I like it better, But I think the album is better. If that makes sense. So I, If we're just looking at those four that we said, We're all part of that group of seven that was made within 40 or
[1:30:00]Released within 41 days of each other. I think this should certainly be ahead of that. So one 86 at a minimum. So I think it's rolling bone. I think it's should be a lot higher in the list with the, Which means it has a lower number. Russell. Okay. A wolf and man is what I'm thinking. Seeing a little bit of that chest hair. What do you think of this album? Metallica by Metallica. I almost went sideways and, And said it was too high. Wow. What caught me off guard is when you go in, You start listening to a lot of metallic and you listen to the Early stuff. It is so much faster. It just feels like straight fire. And this is kind of slow, Heavy and plotting, But there, There are commercial hits all over this. I love this album. If I were to, If I had ever had to get my albums down to like 20 of them, If we had to do a tournament, This, This is staying in the collection, No matter what overall 8.67 out of 10 on my scale. This is rolling the rust scale, Rolling bone. It's got, It's got to be higher on the list. It's called, It's,
[1:31:00]It's known as the black album. It's, It's so cool. Like if you say, Oh, Do you have the black album? Everyone knows exactly what that is. Right. And I would bet for our age, Our demographic of dudes, Everyone knows five or six of these songs. They come on at the gym. They come on, You hear it somewhere, You know, Exactly what band that is. This is, This is rolling bone. It's got to be higher on the list. Unfortunately, You guys are incorrect. Shit. This gets a rolling. I mean, There's no other singer. I can get away with just, He's basically a bass drum in the band. It's true. Okay. I mean, Don't call me a McCoy. Cause this is one headfield. I love. How come we, We didn't even get one Lars. We didn't even get one Lars impression, Rob. I like the pair of the drums on this song. I was thinking about something really heavy. And then we made something really heavy. I mean, Every time Lars is interviewed,
[1:32:00]You're just like, I cannot like Metallica. It's like when they would interview kiss. So unlikable, Right? Oh, These guys are just, It's like when they'd interview kiss and you're like, Oh, This is disgusting. I don't ever want to hear these guys talk again. Oh, It's just terrible. Listen, We love the album. We think it's great. Next up. It's shark week. So we've got deaf punks. Discovery. Like discovery channel. Is that the joke? That's not the discovery I made as a teen. I'll tell you that. The dead body down by the railroad tracks. Never seen that movie either, By the way, But you're just never seen it. That's probably like a top 10 ones. I've seen. We, We had a VHS back. I've got the perfect podcast for you, Jack. Rob. I was, I was looking through my, The family cookbook here and I forgot to leave you guys the last
[1:33:00]Room. Rule of baking. It says too much baking powder brings all kinds of, Whoa, Bad or running over the edges of the pan cake falling in the center, Cracked gummy, Tough crust, Coarse, Crumbly texture. Wow. And too little livening may cause undersized products, Peaked, Dull crust, Heaviness and leathery streaks. What the hell are leathery streaks and baking? You know what? It's time. I've had to throw away some underwear that has a leathery streaks in them. Oh, I'll tell you right now. Between that and undersized products. I figured this book was right up your alley, Man. I don't need that at all. I'm going to avoid that for sure. Yes. And now I'm going to remember a joke from earlier in the podcast. I don't know if we had any jokes in this one. Your Dale Earnhardt opportunity is waiting. Hey, Can you guys just remind me later? I got a question. I got to ask you guys. Very good. Very good.
[1:34:00]Thank you.
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