James Brown: Live at the Apollo (1963)

[00:00]in 2020 four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums as decided by

[00:04]rolling stone magazine this resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music excoriated the

[00:09]order and led to making this podcast we are far from experts we promise to do almost no research

[00:13]all opinions are our own unless you disagree please sit back and enjoy beck did it better

[00:19]from 1963 this is album 65 yes live from the apollo yes which is round yeah

[00:36]yes yes

[00:39]i've always wondered what you guys do while i read this part so i held up the phone by the

[00:46]computer so i could watch you this time never doing that again you guys are staring blankly

[00:49]into space like a couple of chuck e cheese automatism on the band that has not been

[00:53]activated yet like it's just i couldn't have any funny thoughts we're getting ready i'm watching

[00:59]football i'm prepared man i was looking at you guys and i was thinking like oh this is a disaster

[01:04]oh look guys have you ever sat down to make a parody song and then when you look at the songs

[01:09]on the album you realize there aren't all the james brown hits on the album that maybe you

[01:12]thought were there so a lot of the ideas you had are right out the window and then when you go to

[01:16]find a karaoke track on youtube it turns out the karaoke tracks are not on the album

[01:19]not high quality has that ever happened to you happens all the time right happens all the time

[01:24]you just gotta power through you gotta just use those creative juices and you gotta power through

[01:27]i was thinking we could do night train with all the cities you've blown loads in

[01:31]oh oh what the fuck already we're gonna start with this i was actually gonna do i was actually

[01:38]gonna do night rain and then play some of your audio from the other night where it's like

[01:41]you're like i think my favorite jazz drummer

[01:44]i was like what is going on at eric's house i was like right next to these

[01:49]on the airport i think we should stick with aaron's idea

[01:52]okay uh new york and uh rochester minnesota and that's about it right yeah not world not really

[02:03]not uh no not much hack and sack or too much family too much family in the cabin for hack

[02:12]and sack to make the list i've never laid down in the bathroom

[02:16]that's ridiculous

[02:17]um

[02:19]this is uh let's tune into k-rob after i edit that part out

[02:23]what's up everybody this is k-rob k-r-o-b the other day they were talking what's better desserts

[02:28]or appetizers everybody wanted to weigh in and somebody said wolfman rob what do you think and

[02:33]i said hey what has two thumbs and love two scoops it's me baby oh yeah ice cream ice cream

[02:42]ice cream ice cream it's the best desserts

[02:49]it's always a pleasure

[02:51]oh yeah

[02:53]it's a million times better

[03:05]order me too

[03:09]cause i need me too

[03:12]some say some say

[03:18]tracks are going

[03:19]here some say they'd rather have appetizers that are made in the oven they're wrong they're wrong they're wrong they're wrong it makes me realize my co-hosts are morons

[03:41]yes they have a low iq oh wait what

[03:45]you

[03:49]when you want to hear about the greatest albums of all time

[03:55]of course i was gonna i was like

[03:57]but you're just too lazy to look it up online

[03:59]they don't like ice cream and i like ice cream

[04:01]and then they're like i don't want to hit the guys in chat and then they get off track

[04:05]i was like beautiful saxophone solo

[04:07]i've got that

[04:08]no russell i was playing there's background singing on the karaoke track so i had to over sing

[04:12]that did it better

[04:13]i you crushed it

[04:14]yeah it was every i was i was that's why i'm the second hardest working man in show business

[04:18]you're the hardest working man in show business

[04:19]you're the hardest working man in show business

[04:19]i have to admit i'm kind of disappointed rob i thought for sure that was going to turn in from ice cream to ice cream about when you listen to aaron's stories

[04:26]i got i got a lot tonight

[04:29]guys i got three guys here we're going to talk about james brown we talk about the best 500 albums as according to rolling stone magazine and that's what i meant to say didn't the 65 times now just about to get it right

[04:38]i've got three guys here who thought that james brown at the apollo is when he was in rocky four

[04:44]throw the towel

[04:46]throw the towel

[04:47]throw the towel

[04:49]throw the towel

[04:49]if this podcast dies it dies

[04:56]uh i've got uh russ in minnesota russ how are you doing

[05:02]doing great it is indeed a great place to present to you at this particular time national and international known the hardest working man in the podcast business mr apple orchard the amazing mr please please himself by laughing at his own jokes

[05:14]and not the main host

[05:17]nobody

[05:19]would ever say

[05:19]i thought he was daddy fat stacks

[05:21]sorry

[05:22]i've given russ the sign that he's getting fined twenty dollars

[05:26]i've got matt minneapolis matt how are you doing

[05:31]great rob thanks for having me as always

[05:34]and i've got aaron who thought the song tonight was going to be a night rain oh shit i already used that joke son of a bitch i wrote this one down i forgot about that aaron in california how are you doing aaron

[05:43]oh

[05:44]oh

[05:44],

[05:48]shucks i'm excited to talk about james brown

[05:50]that is awesome guys we have to get right into it we've got because today we've actually got two voicemails to the

[05:57]how do you how do you

[05:57]kiss my ass that's a great dumb shit listeners they can't even tell what we're doing

[06:02]according to

[06:02]some of my listeners are dumb shits

[06:04]they're just the dumbest of the dumb

[06:05]texting on your phone which i don't think i've ever seen before but we did get an email to beckdiditbetter at gmail.com from a text from the phone so it was like i was living in 1992

[06:14]this sounds like one of aaron's friends i've been out with aaron before where aaron fucked up by sending an email from his phone

[06:19]yeah i do need to send an apology about that that happened to me once

[06:23]and uh you can also call 802-277-BECK

[06:29]nice

[06:29]so this i have to say this is an actual email we got and it i have to say we were talking about it last time it is such a nice email to get i'm serious like listen to this somebody loves us

[06:41]okay

[06:42]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[06:43]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[06:43]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[06:43]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[06:44]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[06:44]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[06:44]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[06:44]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[07:14]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[07:44]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[08:14]back did it better is the best email i've ever had

[08:14]i will give you that but the number of times you rip on rosie and russell and me a little bit more my mom than anything

[08:21]you are not the nicest guy in this podcast you do carry it you are not the nicest guy but you do have a big heart so big heart two out of three ain't bad

[08:30]it's got all that ice cream uh yeah you know what you're right man i am the nicest guy and the best listener on the podcast so i appreciate that i think that's great

[08:38]uh but it is funny because we were talking about this at like doing this podcast i literally

[08:44]know your guys's schedule more than anyone else almost in my life like i i have no idea what jenny's

[08:50]doing this weekend but i know exactly like what most of you guys are doing most weekends just

[08:54]because we have to schedule this show and we know what color your poops are

[08:58]yeah damn it aaron

[09:01]so far that's russ's favorite subject rob rob you may even know how you may even know how many

[09:12]states i've blown a load in in the last two

[09:14]oh my god well i know you're in chicago i know you're somewhere else i can't remember where else

[09:20]you're in paris and i know that i know that you might be blowing a load in a different state

[09:27]coming this weekend we'll see and thank you for the very nice email we appreciate it

[09:32]now on to our second email that you got to admit though you got a pretty lousy life if the key to

[09:38]your happiness comes through this podcast right i i can't imagine uh let's uh let's go to a voice

[09:44]mail from matt's mother-in-law it could be fun to ask my favorite son-in-law what his favorite

[09:48]vegetables are from his mother-in-law patty so we got a text from casey casem vegetables um it was

[09:55]somehow an email a text sent to an email very confusing to me but she wants me to ask you what

[09:59]is your favorite vegetable man and keep in mind you are 40 years old oh no can i say none oh no

[10:06]no you can't you can't green beans and maybe have cheese all over it's where you put cheese all over

[10:14]green beans and i might eat peas only if the boys are around so that they don't think i'm a complete

[10:19]animal that doesn't need any vegetables but i cannot stand vegetables cannot what cannot stand

[10:26]them i if i if i feel like i need some i i uh blend them up in a smoothie or something like

[10:32]that but otherwise yeah and this is your isn't your wife uh yeah my wife's a vegetarian i only

[10:37]eat meat it works out well for both of us right i mean then there's no fighting over the left or

[10:44]right so really you can you can buy the same quantity of vegetables and meat that you would

[10:48]typically buy it's just one focuses on one and one focuses on the other yeah i suppose it's a

[10:53]straight up jack spratt situation that we have going on over here a what jack spratt could eat

[10:58]no fat his wife could eat no lean oh right but between them something something they lick the

[11:04]platter clean so picture matt and his wife is that the guy from the pirates of the caribbean movie

[11:08]yes that's jack famous captain jack spratt yeah i don't know

[11:14]but you know i don't want any you know like i go we've i finally found this one vietnamese place

[11:19]and i at or a thai place was a thai it's a thai restaurant called road osha in uptown

[11:24]absolutely love it but i like the exact same thing exact same thing every time what do you get

[11:29]chicken fried rice pineapple chicken fried rice uh spice level three no raisins no scallions no

[11:35]cilantro like i can't even have scallions or cilantro on it because i just the crunching

[11:40]or whatever it is and then you know there is 10 of the world that i've been to i've been to

[11:44]um cilantro tastes like soap and i'm one of them it absolutely tastes like it just it's the worst

[11:50]i can't take it matt do you think your mom mother-in-law called in with this message or

[11:54]texted in to the gmail with this message to call you out for not being a vegetable guy or

[11:59]yeah you just always go to her house and you never eat them and she's wondering what's going on or

[12:02]what yeah no i think i think you know when we first started dating there's there's there's two

[12:06]things to this when we first started dating our the first time i went over their house this is

[12:10]matt and his wife or matt and his mother-in-law when you say when we first started dating

[12:14]the first time i met my mother-in-law the conversation was somewhere along this like

[12:26]so you don't eat any vegetables and sarah kind of you know primed her and said you know like

[12:29]what am i going to serve for dinner let me go over it out so we had like this nacho bar thing right

[12:33]so i can just have my nice yeah matt matt did that matt did what my kids did he got

[12:39]chicken fingers and a bowl of rice he's like oh yum yum on the kids menu i would eat that

[12:44]very nice and so then the the next thing that she you know after she asked me this is this is

[12:50]true story now and i actually got permission from her to talk about this at some point if it ever

[12:54]came up but she said the first thing she said one can't can't eat vegetables okay that's weird

[12:59]whatever and then she goes you guys know what this thing is this thing called a glory hole is

[13:04]first time i ever met her no i don't

[13:08]it's that was my what but my question is how do you how do you answer

[13:13]that because you either say no i don't and then you kind of look like this really you know

[13:18]polished clean guy or you say yeah i know what that is and then she's like who the fuck's this

[13:22]guy yeah i think it was a test yeah i i i was wondering but no i don't think it's i think she's

[13:29]just very open about did you say like why are glory holes so big like why are they always so

[13:33]big around like they don't need to be that big around i don't need that much space they're so

[13:37]big like what is somebody sticking their arm through there you don't need it to be that big

[13:41]how about a tiny glory hole for guys like me yep

[13:43]yep i thought it was on a test that reminds me the first time i met my father-in-law he was

[13:47]raising pigs and so he took me out and he goes look at the size of the scrotum on this pig

[13:53]and the thing was pigs have do have enormous scrotums i mean it looks like they're going

[14:00]backpacking around europe that's how big their balls are they're so big they're enormous and

[14:05]i was like actually that's really big but instead i said something like oh it's not that big and

[14:09]then that sounded like weird like i was kind of like dragging and i was like i don't know what i

[14:13]want either that's not what i want and i was like i don't know what i want and i was like i don't

[14:13]know what i want this is a disaster

[14:15]when was the first time you met your father-in-law rosie

[14:20]uh this is uh that's a very good question that's a good question uh it was not

[14:27]the most opportune time oh no what does that mean

[14:33]it was uh okay it was at the glory hole aaron you need to warn us that you're going to bring

[14:38]the story down the podcast down again or not no no this isn't to bring it down this is all right

[14:43]this is uh it was uh i hadn't you know i hadn't met him you know yet uh i hadn't been introduced

[14:50]to him as a person who was dating his daughter time that we met him so we know you haven't met

[14:55]him so please continue i don't think i don't know that he was aware that i existed or maybe he was

[15:00]aware that i existed but he certainly wasn't expecting to see me the day that he uh met

[15:05]hey who's running down the stairs and out and who's running down the stairs

[15:13]when i'm coming in oh my god yes me at my show did have clothes on but i had a t-shirt on that

[15:18]said rock star on it so that was oh you got you got fast i'm obviously not a rock star so yeah

[15:25]yeah things are good now but free breathalyzer poke here and it was

[15:29]so where did you meet him there where was it at uh at my um now sister-in-law's house

[15:38]well explain you're leaving out some details here

[15:43]i'm saying any more than that i'll tell you i'll tell you i'll tell you really briefly only because

[15:48]we're bringing up father-in-law is my father-in-law denny who has called into the show once or twice

[15:53]passed away about a couple weeks ago now and was one of the greatest guys but the first time i ever

[15:58]met him first time i met him sarah we were out drinking at a bar and she had talked me into

[16:03]spending the night right and she says i'm like you know what i just she's living with her dad at the

[16:08]time um after college things like that i'm like i just don't want to i don't want to meet your dad

[16:13]sleeps till like nine you know like you just get up early and go okay so i got up man i got up at

[16:19]like six o'clock can you imagine how horny you'd have to be to wake up and know you're gonna see

[16:23]her dad there you'd have to i would just be like no i will never do this ever she could pull a gun

[16:29]on me and i'd be like shoot now because this is humiliating she she talked me she's like no it'll

[16:35]be fine just get up early get out you know no worries kind of a thing i'm like okay it sounds

[16:39]good so i got up like 5 45 hopping out the window crawling walking around knocking on the door and

[16:43]being like oh hello i just showed up this morning uh why don't you have any shoes on

[16:49]why are your shoes already in the house who's up at 5 45 halfway through their paper drinking

[16:57]coffee was was denny oh no she tricked me so what'd you do did you have a conversation what

[17:03]happened nope i just said hey and i ran out of there and did he ever let you forget about it

[17:09]did he remind you of it forever nah he was too nice he wouldn't bring it up but i brought it

[17:13]up numerous times you guys you guys got any buttermilk and you're like in there like digging

[17:18]around in the fridge and it's like oh sorry sorry i should have put on a towel or something you guys

[17:22]got any yeah yeah mine was definitely similar matt it was definitely am oh we were just headed

[17:29]out to you know lunch moment it's like well it's 9 30 in the morning like oh yeah how about you

[17:35]rob what was your your uh first meeting with the in-laws was there any skulking around in the house

[17:40]looking for buttermilk or what no i am a guys i am

[17:43]a gentleman okay i treat the ladies uh like a fine wine okay and i would never go visit their

[17:51]parents until i've been dating them for weeks because remember jenny didn't want anyone to

[17:54]know that i was dating her for the first bit she wanted it to be a huge secret who knows why could

[17:59]be any reason nobody actually knows why that was why she wanted to be a huge secret uh definitely

[18:04]not because of just me in general okay also why we had to get married in the dark like those

[18:08]restaurants i want to go to she said it was more sensual i was like i don't even know if that's you

[18:13]uh yeah no so we went and i went to the farm and actually the first time i met her parents we

[18:18]butchered chickens together so they got to see how squeamish i was around oh that's romantic

[18:23]did you uh chop the heads off uh no they would not give me that job i had a job of like

[18:28]checking to see if jenny did a good job with her thing like they they humiliated me by giving me

[18:33]like oh you're an idiot you can't do any of this if a chicken's head fall when it falls off does

[18:37]it really run around for a while oh no no no no no my father-in-law made a big speech about how

[18:42]it's much better if they bleed out the skin and then they bleed out the skin and then they bleed

[18:43]out slowly they taste way better and i was like i was like why does uber not come out here to pick

[18:49]me up and get me out of this situation this is a disaster and you looked at him and you said i don't

[18:53]do anything slowly sir giving like the wink you know guys let's get into rolling going

[19:02]is it time

[19:04]like when there's time to me that's like when people say what are you reading right now and

[19:12]i'm not actually reading

[19:13]i have to like make something up you know and be like yeah i was going to so many weddings with

[19:18]with steve that steve and you know we were sitting at the same table that we started this game of

[19:23]that i would have one bite for every wedding so we started wedding one i said okay i'll have one

[19:28]bite wedding two and we got up to like 14 and it was miserable rob aren't you pissed you paid for

[19:33]like a whole a whole tray of vegetables for matt like his plate was full of brussels sprouts and

[19:38]he probably didn't eat any of them russell it might surprise you to recall that my wedding was a buffet

[19:43]okay that might surprise you to know that my wedding wasn't all you can eat a fair everybody's

[19:48]like is there open bar i was like no but there's tons of souvlaki are you greek no i'm not i just

[19:54]like no i just like souvlaki uh rolling going aaron how's it going with you it's uh i don't

[20:00]want to steal a phrase but i'm i'm kind of in a glass case of emotion this week there's a lot

[20:04]happening in my life uh you'll notice those of you who are watching on the video i'm inside my

[20:10]house this evening because wait how many people are watching on the

[20:13]video is it more than us or not i mean you never know all right we could be we could be getting

[20:18]hacked the only video i have from aaron's house is showing his closed toilet right now so i don't

[20:22]that's important that's yeah and that's for research purposes oh no that camera's for

[20:28]research purposes okay chuck berry and i set that up not a big deal so i uh we had a giant rainstorm

[20:35]we had a bomb cyclone last week on sunday and uh the roof on my podcast studio failed so it was

[20:42]raining in the podcast

[20:43]studio so that uh that happened and um uh my lady was kind enough to tell me that tonight i should

[20:50]not uh record in the garage where there may or may not be black mold so i'm recording here inside the

[20:56]the kitchen so that's one thing so there's actually rain coming in your garage like oh yeah full on

[21:03]just dumping through the roof just just to give people an idea this is what aaron's garage sounds

[21:06]like when there's not a collapsed roof sometimes i enjoyed the balance more than some of the more

[21:13]or i don't know if you call musical whatever you want to call them there's so much going on with

[21:16]some of these songs that i enjoyed the balance broadcasting from a shower that he's taking

[21:21]right so tonight i'm just laying on the ground or in the shower

[21:24]oh you just took a shower you're all sweaty coming out that's so weird

[21:33]oh crap now i can't edit that out

[21:37]so of course what do you do when you've had

[21:43]a gigantic storm blow through your neighborhood you watch the perfect storm which it turns out

[21:48]is the greatest movie ever made so i watched it's a good one i watched the perfect storm again this

[21:53]week and every time i think that maybe spoiler alert for our listeners who haven't seen it

[21:57]every time i think that maybe billy tyne and bobby are gonna make it over that last wave and they're

[22:02]gonna go home and diane lane's gonna be happy she and bobby are gonna move into the new place they

[22:07]got together and it turns out they didn't make it every time i'm just crushed by that moment so that

[22:11]was tough you are but

[22:13]a true a true optimist aaron you are like too sweet for this world like thinking like oh maybe

[22:17]this movie's gonna work out this one time even though i've seen it over and over i just keep

[22:21]hoping that it's gonna happen so so did the perfect storm again this week uh and then the

[22:25]other thing that i'm really uh fascinated about that i learned about uh i just finished a book

[22:30]called why we swim by bonnie suey uh i'm probably not saying that right and it's all about the

[22:35]anthropological reasons why humans have decided that swimming is important to us there is a

[22:40]martial art uh in japan called i'm gonna say this wrong too i believe

[22:43]it's called nihan aho this is samurai swimming people have kept this alive it's it's a general

[22:50]kind of treading water style but they do swim in full samurai armor uh some of these some of

[22:57]these youtube videos they are holding a rifle and firing the like they're treading water holding

[23:02]rifles shooting a gun outside of the water another one a guy is holding a flag waving the flag around

[23:08]the flag is not getting wet and then when you see the underwater camera they're doing this like very

[23:11]cool frog leg camera and they're doing this like very cool frog leg camera and they're doing this

[23:13]kick thing uh so that's what i'm into i i gotta find a nihan aho uh school so i can learn samurai

[23:19]swimming give me a second here i want i want everybody to hear this loud and clear i'm actually

[23:22]going to turn the volume all the way up oh that was errant i mean what the hell is he talking

[23:30]about i guess i earned that one you found you found the end of the internet you found it i mean

[23:38]i swear to god if i have another guy come up to me today and talk to me about samurai swimming oh

[23:43]it's like oh squid game oh samurai swimming it's like it's all everybody's talking about

[23:47]i i have to ask rosie what what is the purpose of it though you know like every time they got

[23:52]these things like there's martial arts because they got this and there's but but what is the

[23:55]purpose of swimming in samurai gear i think at this point at least from what i could tell in

[24:01]the book i think it's it's to keep a tradition alive primarily i mean i don't think anyone at

[24:05]this moment is like trying to i mean what was it like you know a thousand years ago was there

[24:13]and that was like a sneak attack to i do think that's possible yeah i think that would like

[24:17]swim across a river to try to you know sneak up on your enemy kind of thing yeah well and

[24:22]aaron's talked a lot in the past about you know trying to keep traditions alive and how important

[24:26]it is so that's what i'm into yeah that's why he's a big supporter of all those whaling that

[24:31]they're doing uh in japan he thinks it's a good idea he's actually on a ship fighting off the

[24:35]anti-whaling ships that are trying to run into whaling ships he's stopping them from stopping

[24:39]the whaling he's like we have too many whales these whales need to go uh check this out i'm

[24:43]gonna put on samurai gear and hop into the ocean i'm wearing my full samurai gear yeah that's it

[24:47]that's me you guys get me yeah oh yeah oh aaron samurai swimming absolutely the looks on our

[24:53]faces look like when i was reading the beginning of the podcast just all of us dead face not

[24:57]surprised i didn't i was like oh yeah samurai swimming and then to read a book so again i just

[25:01]want everybody at home to picture so our fan at home okay just picture you're you're living with

[25:05]aaron you've married aaron right he comes in hey what are you reading about oh yeah these guys jump

[25:09]put on samurai armor and just you just hear a buzz in your head just like the rest of time

[25:13]you're like aloha you're like oh here we go again but she bought me the book it was a gift it was

[25:18]she was she saw the book at the bookstore and she thought i would like it and she brought it home to

[25:21]me so that's really sweet that's why you guys are perfect for each other exactly has to be somebody

[25:27]in california that's doing this i know i'm gonna find it yep i'm gonna find it we and i'll give you

[25:33]the password to the back to the better instagram you gotta post that would be by far our most

[25:37]watched reel of all time it'd be crazy everybody would go crazy for it uh russ rolling going how's

[25:42]it going with you

[25:43]rolling going speaking of rolling i went to the rolling stones concert this last week in the

[25:48]rolling stones in town all the cool kids what did they open with you know that's the only thing i

[25:52]care about with concerts i don't know i can't answer the question okay i'm gonna look at you

[25:58]keep going the reason i can't look it up matt matt you went to the concert didn't you what did

[26:03]they open fighting man street fighting man that's a good i like that one yep and what they close

[26:07]with matt because again i don't know the answer to that one either satisfaction

[26:11]this

[26:12]this is a good one i don't know the answer to that one either

[26:13]this does not sound good this is not this this sounds are you sure you didn't go see a rolling

[26:18]stones tribute band oh no i made it i made it there so i thought i could share my experience

[26:24]with you guys at the rolling stones concert wow maybe get your thoughts on some of some of the

[26:29]things that happened how you would have handled it differently is that cool i think that sounds

[26:33]like such a good idea i can't and i'm sure just your description of it makes me think that this

[26:37]went perfectly russ go ahead so excited to hear about it all right so i decided i had to go see

[26:42]the stones if we're doing this podcast i'm going to go see the stones if we're doing this podcast

[26:43]rolling stones are coming how many more chances do you get to see them so i i get tickets for it

[26:48]i go i go with the date i bring a date to the stones concert oh yes oh this is gonna be even

[26:53]sweeter than i thought oh i'm drooling and so immediately so we take an uber we go down to

[26:59]the stadium so we uber no car down there but we uber down and you got to walk all around and so

[27:03]we start getting in line and we get to the front of the line and my date has a small purse won't

[27:08]let her in because she's got a person out can't go in with the person what so then they

[27:13]they say there's other entrances where you can get in with a small bag but they won't let you

[27:18]in and there's multiple lines probably like eight lines in the in that area you can't get in any of

[27:23]them we go to the next one get to the you can see up there nope no bags so we have to walk around

[27:29]the whole stadium for you know 15 minutes before we can even find a line that we can get in and

[27:34]this is after we'd already been up and been told we can't be let in because she's got a purse so

[27:39]it's like all right we're already off to a rough start right this this feels to me

[27:43]like you're starting to get a taste of what it's like to be married like this is just like a small

[27:47]taste because you in your mind i mean did you just say why don't you throw the purse away

[27:51]right did that thought occur to you like throw the purse away or i'll like put the purse under

[27:56]my shirt or something yeah to be fair she was gonna bring like one of those small backpacks

[28:01]you know kind of those uh back a small backpack not one you put an athlete or apples in but a

[28:07]small one it's like it's like the size of a pig scrotum right and i said they might not they might

[28:12]not let you in with that

[28:13]it might be one of those clear bag places where they're not going to let you bring a big bag

[28:16]in there and so then she got out a new purse so at this point i'm just like okay i'm just going

[28:22]to stay out of it yeah let her do her thing put where bring what she needs so eventually we get

[28:26]in but it takes us 25 30 minutes longer because we've been waiting in lines that we couldn't get

[28:31]in so then we get in and we decide if you're going to a concert are you guys souvenir guys you go get

[28:37]a shirt or do you not pay for that type of stuff at a concert no i haven't i usually don't well i

[28:43]freaking bucks for a t-shirt so i was like it was $50 for a t-shirt we decided to get them because

[28:48]i'm all about getting the shirt i think it's fun to get that and they look pretty cool you know

[28:52]it's that rolling stones logo with the big tongue different different designs with it but it takes

[28:58]like 30 40 minutes just to get through a line of like eight people like people get up there and

[29:03]they're they don't know what they want they don't know what size they are they're not ready with the

[29:07]card and it's just like a disaster and the whole time i'm just like steaming i'm like what are we

[29:12]doing here why are we being so

[29:13]stupid can't we just like go up there say what number you want say the size and be done with it

[29:18]people can't handle it this is sounding more and more like you're married i love it i think this

[29:22]is great now you're married with kids of like why am i dealing with this shit why do i have to wait

[29:27]in line this is stupid concert pro tip most shows most shows unless they're like super duper bands

[29:33]that are into all the merch and the posters and everything you just wait till after the concert

[29:37]man they've got so much of that crap especially if they're going to like a bunch of other cities

[29:41]they got all sorts of stuff

[29:43]and they're still selling at the end of the concert that's the great part about new york

[29:46]is that when i step out of a concert in new york all the people are there selling knockoffs so you

[29:50]can get that shirt five bucks you know i i got a tenacious d shirt for like seven bucks there's no

[29:54]big deal how much were they selling it for for real eight bucks i wouldn't weigh that line i'm

[29:59]not an idiot we eventually got up there and i i bought my data shirt i was like hey this will be

[30:04]a cool memory like you know i bought two of them 125 for two t-shirts oh yes how much for the ticket

[30:13]i mean the tickets were extremely expensive 125 so at this point i'm just like i've got my head in

[30:19]my hands and i'm like god dang it you know because like i'm this is why maybe other people are paying

[30:25]attention and i'm just like just get up there pick one out and be done with it so oh my god

[30:29]so at this point i'm already kind of a bit aggravated married but it is what it is but

[30:34]you know we're going to see the stones it's going to be amazing so we go up and we had talked about

[30:38]this a few weeks ago i asked you guys where should you sit for a concert and matt explicitly told me

[30:42]dude i'm not going to sit for a concert i'm going to sit for a concert i'm going to sit for a concert

[30:43]sit in the upper deck at u.s bank stadium can i actually can i just can i just lay something here

[30:47]i will answer that at u.s bank stadium specifically sitting up in anything that is a two or three in

[30:56]front of it and as far as the section just forget about it there is no acoustics in that place

[31:02]we need to sit lower if only if only someone had told you russell i just want to see what you think

[31:09]because you're everybody's making fun of me oh rob so mean rob so mean actually when our listeners

[31:13]know i have a heart of gold okay let's see how much russ cares about matt's opinion about things

[31:18]speak please so here's here's here was my line of thinking to get in the lower deck and i don't know

[31:25]matt went to the concert i don't know what matt paid that was that's his business but i'll tell

[31:30]you well when i was looking for lower deck tickets even if they weren't that great we're we're talking

[31:36]like we were we were talking like i was seeing like upper 300s minimum so over 400 to sit in the

[31:42]lower deck and it's like we're talking like we're talking like we're talking like we're talking like

[31:43]man if i'm paying for two tickets for that i'm buying these shirts maybe we're getting drinks

[31:47]before like this could be like a thousand dollar night like i might as well be taking a trip

[31:51]somewhere at that point and i'm just like i don't want to pay i don't want to pay 400 bucks for

[31:57]for a concert so i just i'm like i'll try to get the best seats i can in the upper deck so i'm like

[32:01]eventually in the like six in the morning i saw i saw these seats first row upper deck on the aisle

[32:07]i'm like yes i'm like that's that's that can't be too bad you're on the aisle you can get in and out

[32:13]early easily so i go in and we're walking to our seats and we walk in and i really immediately

[32:20]realize i've made a huge mistake yeah because i am terrified of heights and the difference at

[32:28]u.s bank stadium a lot of times when you go to stadiums if you sit in an upper deck there's like

[32:31]a cement barrier in front of you so you can't really see you can see out in front by the stage

[32:36]but you can't see directly down but there's like a plexiglass barrier in front of you at this

[32:42]so you're sitting there and if you look down where your feet are you look like you're you're

[32:47]looking over like a hundred foot ledge oh my god and i immediately become nervous as shit i've i'm

[32:53]i'm super uncomfortable i'm even letting my date know like i'm uncomfortable with this i don't

[32:57]like heights i wish i wouldn't have got these seats i'm immediately not having fun oh no oh

[33:03]oh if this if this was something i could inject in my veins i would be hooked to it i'm addicted

[33:09]i want to listen to this before i go to bed tonight again this story about

[33:12]this date it's so fun to me can you imagine being on a date with russell hey how's it going so far

[33:17]uh i'm terrified oh great do you mind what the what the sticker price was for those tickets

[33:24]i paid like 220 total so so 110 each with fees and everything so i was like that that's 220 bucks

[33:32]but like i'm like we're in the if the first row the upper deck i know we're far away but it can't

[33:36]be that bad i i heard that i didn't listen to matt yeah if only someone would have told jimmy so then

[33:41]we sit down and i'm telling my date like i'm just kind of i'm just being honest because i'm

[33:45]uncomfortable i'm nervous like my date's standing up turning around taking like selfies of the stage

[33:50]and i'm like freaked out that like someone's standing in this front row hey she was having

[33:54]fun that's good yeah if uh those out there uh in back to the better land if you want to see a

[33:59]picture of russell's date take a selfie with a scared russell clinging for life in the background

[34:04]okay i wouldn't even stand up for a picture with that but i was like i'm not standing up i'm scared

[34:09]so so then we sit down and i'm just kind of i'm just literally just trying to relax i'm like

[34:14]their band's gonna come on soon that i've had a drink or two i'm gonna be fine you know i'm

[34:18]it's gonna be fine so i'm just kind of trying to relax take it all in and then all of a sudden my

[34:22]date kind of taps me on the shoulder and she says you think you have a bad look at the guy look at

[34:26]this next to me so i turn and look and the guy who's sitting next to her is doing like the full

[34:31]man spreading where his legs are like halfway into both chairs beside him like his legs are just way

[34:38]far out and i'm just sitting there and like so she's gotta like completely turn legs turn the

[34:43]other way she can barely even sit in her seat you know what i'm saying oh and so i'm sitting there

[34:47]and i'm like papa don't take no mess i'm nervous um i'm not happy so and i'm just fucking aggravated

[34:54]at this point honestly and so i think about it for a second and i kind of lean over and i look

[34:59]at the guy and i say dude can we pull our legs in what are we doing here like or something along

[35:03]those lines like can we just pull our legs in and he says oh why don't we stand up and talk about it

[35:07]oh no i'm not doing that i absolutely will not do that but admittedly the whole time i was even

[35:12]talking to him i was like nervous i'd like don't even want to get into anything and so he kind of

[35:15]says something back to me but he pulls his legs in and he kind of says something back we kind of

[35:20]say something back and forth but it doesn't really escalate a whole lot but then all of a sudden his

[35:24]wife who was on the other side starts yelling at me and my date and she's like why are you yelling

[35:30]at my husband why are you giving him a hard time all this stuff and at this point my date decides

[35:35]to speak up and she should and she essentially said i'm not doing that i'm not doing that i'm not

[35:37]your husband's leg is all over me here you know like we've paid for our tickets too you know he

[35:44]needs to pull like what she was just saying like he's gonna he doesn't need to be sitting on me and

[35:50]so you look at his name tag and his name is steve big balls johnson and he's like i can't i can't

[35:55]help why are people wearing name tags to the concert it literally some well he okay well

[36:01]actually there's a good reason why okay he's a bellhop and he got to go to the concert bellhop

[36:04]is one of the few jobs you can do with his huge balls

[36:07]okay because he can hide it he everybody thinks it's an extra bag that he's hopping very he

[36:12]actually gets a bigger tip because people think it's a handbag they go that's as big as a pig

[36:17]that's crazy actually russell it sounds a lot like you were maybe sitting next to me and my

[36:20]wife at the concert where i'm my wife yells at you well so so so then my date kind of gets in

[36:27]because the the guy's wife starts yelling at us and she's just getting belligerent she's like

[36:31]yelling at us and all this my date's not having that i'll just be straightforward she's like

[36:35]not having that she's like your husband's

[36:37]is sitting on top of me i'm not gonna take this if you're gonna keep yelling at us i'm gonna go

[36:42]get security and like they don't take no mess yeah so they're talking about so they're they're

[36:47]yelling back and forth for like 20 seconds and i'm over here like just ready to die i'm like

[36:51]i'm scared i've been in lines all day i'm aggravated i've just paid 125 bucks for

[36:58]two fucking t-shirts and then out of that small purse she pulls a knife and you're like oh this

[37:03]was a great idea i'm glad we brought that in so so i'm just like can we please just stop can we

[37:07]just let it can we stop i'm like talking to all the people like can we just stop and like part of

[37:12]it is you know my date mentioned this it's not just you wanting to have fun but like people behind

[37:16]you are there like you don't want to ruin yeah a concert for other people that are trying to enjoy

[37:20]it it was just so finally we just sit down and it's just like silence no conversation going on

[37:25]between me my date or the people next to us oh so eventually i'm like eventually the concert's

[37:32]gonna start they're gonna be awesome jagger comes out he's all over the floor he's running around

[37:37]music starts up the acoustics in the upper deck at u.s bank stadium are the worst in the history

[37:43]of the world matt was right oh no i couldn't i couldn't hear any of the music i have no idea

[37:48]what songs were being played it took me it took me five songs before i could understand one song

[37:54]and i think it was beast of burden but i could have been wrong oh my like you couldn't hear

[37:59]lyrics you couldn't hear the music yeah you're wrong they didn't play beast of burden well i

[38:03]i don't know what it was but russell's like oh my god

[38:07]i can't even hear those guys playing the horns and she's like those guitars those aren't even

[38:11]so we can't hear anything so by like and my date and i are both we're in agreement neither of us

[38:17]can hear anything it's not just me like no one around us is up cheering or anything i don't

[38:21]think anyone can hear anything up there and so at some point we're like let's just abandon these

[38:26]seats let's go downstairs and try to just stand in the in the concourse so we go down there and

[38:31]we're down there for probably six or seven songs but we can't see anything we can hear and the

[38:37]better but we can't see anything because you're standing behind chairs and whatnot and so finally

[38:43]there's like four or five songs left to go we need to get an uber back and it's cold my date has

[38:49]already made it clear that she's probably not going to do well in the cold and so we decide

[38:54]we're just out of here we're not staying for satisfaction we're out of here we're not going

[38:57]to get an uber so then you think the night's over in his head oh my god the horror is over like

[39:03]i've screwed everything up as it is so we're leaving and she's like well

[39:07]i'm gonna get an uber now so when we get outside it'll be there i'm like we're in the middle of a

[39:11]stadium i don't think you can order it here it's gonna end up on like the wrong side of the building

[39:15]we had we had a slight different approach and how we would have handled an uber situation there

[39:21]you guys are married yeah it got it got ordered and we got out and like i'm out there and i'm

[39:28]like i don't think a cab can even get to where we're at we're like in the middle of a blocked

[39:32]off street so i'm like well let's just pick well let's pick one we'll go one way or the other we

[39:37]go stand in the corner guy can't get there he's not coming oh so he calls he calls her phone and

[39:44]i'm talking to the guy trying to explain where we're at and he's like well i can't get there

[39:48]i'm on the wrong i'm on the other side of the building i'm like are you coming or not because

[39:52]if you're not coming just tell me so we can get a different ride and then finally he's just like

[39:56]i'm not coming and i'm like god dang it and so i think that makes two of you russell yeah

[40:02]so so then uh

[40:07]so then i kind of i kind of i'm a pissed at this point so i kind of say like i'm gonna leave a bad

[40:13]uber rating like i'm just i don't even know what to say at this point so so he cancels and here's

[40:19]how it's like the ultimate sign of a true disaster is the i he canceled and it turns out my date the

[40:27]next day told me that she got a a cancellation charge and was blaming not blaming me for the

[40:33]charge but it was like what the fuck i got a cancellation charge because of whatever you did

[40:37]and then she was also worried that it was gonna hurt her uber rating

[40:41]yeah you've discussed that with me so rolling stones greatest rock and roll band maybe

[40:48]worst concert ever oh so so russell instead of going to this concert you could have just

[40:53]stood outside of a closet for like two hours right you could have taken like 500 and just

[40:59]burned it you could have stood in the closet and then had a record on the other side of your house

[41:03]play a rolling stones album maybe and then went and stand outside in the cold for a little bit

[41:07]that would have that would have been exactly the same as your date well there was more than 500

[41:11]because we also bought the world's shittiest tacos at the u.s bank stadium too when we had nowhere to

[41:16]stand or see so yeah yeah i don't know i totally forgot that you also got an argument with the

[41:21]people sitting next to you so somebody'd have to call somebody getting to play with them as well

[41:24]yeah so yeah that i'm never going to a concert again that is tough russell matt rolling going

[41:30]how's it going with you well i had a couple things to talk about i was out to dinner with

[41:34]my mother-in-law tonight and somehow the top of the night i was like oh my god i'm gonna go to a

[41:37]pubic hair came up and so we'll get by that and then can i ask you guys am i alive is this heaven

[41:45]that you know like we're getting old guys right because i was looking at this couple and they

[41:51]had like a three-year-old and a one-year-old and they're all to dinner i mean and i swear to god

[41:54]the mom was like 18 years old right so we are getting old we're getting past the young kids

[41:58]stage and all that i can't i can't stand it but russell i had i had a complete different

[42:07]rolling snows concert i can't believe it so i was watching tickets the whole week right like

[42:15]waiting for them to come down you can see there's some over here and over there so you know like the

[42:19]pit in front of the stage 500 bucks first row on the floor 500 bucks there's a standing room only

[42:25]way back in the back of the other end zone kind of a thing for like 100 or like 240 or something

[42:31]like that not going on the floor so my thing like i said always first level yeah as close to the

[42:35]stage as you can as close down to like the front of the stage as you can as close down to like the

[42:37]first row as you can so i'm looking at it where i'm on the first uh first section off of the what

[42:44]would be the right hand side of the stage okay and so and i know how these stages are set up

[42:50]there's a bank of speakers pointing right at us beautiful we heard every

[42:55]your goal at the concert is to sit somewhere where you can see

[43:02]and hear the concert that's like a goal of yours yeah would you advise that others do that as well

[43:07]or not

[43:07]i would you know and so then i'm looking right in like this this first row i could have just

[43:11]forfeited the t-shirts and probably say it with math here we'll do the math in a second you're

[43:16]saving money russell very smart first sections are three it's 396 for the first 30 rows okay

[43:24]and then 31 for your post fees we're living in a fee world we're getting into the rain man

[43:29]situation we'll get i'll get to what i paid in fees roll 31 through 36 in this first section

[43:34]oh god it's 246 so i'm like

[43:37]30 rows is not that bad especially if you got a bank of speakers point right at you so

[43:43]literally we got our ticket i got tickets for 246 and then with fees it was 284

[43:47]okay russell and i was lucky enough to know that ubers is not a good thing coming out of a big ass

[43:55]concert like that okay the smoke time machine it's the smoke it's russell coming back to last

[44:06]week saying russell matt's serious you should talk to matt more about the concert he actually

[44:10]knows what he's talking about and so i went i went with a couple uh of uh beck did a better fans uh

[44:16]kirsten for me diana went to the nick from minneapolis and another guy pat another another

[44:21]story for another day but you know so we sat and literally the people that were in front of us paid

[44:25]150 bucks more than we were running one row back from them but it was great i had my dad drop us

[44:31]off you know and after the concert he was there i could see that the concert was going to end at

[44:36]11 o'clock because that's what time they all end at so he had the spot where he parked we got right

[44:41]in walked right up got right in got right on the 35w was home in about 20 minutes from walking

[44:47]didn't pay a dime for it you know didn't have to buy a t-shirt because 50 bucks that's 50

[44:54]dollars for a t-shirt as macklemore used to say and so it was great they played it was i called

[45:00]it the let it bleed they played five songs off let it bleed okay and to play midnight rambler

[45:05]which rob's playing right over the top here are we gonna do the whole set list i can tell you the

[45:12]whole set list but to hear midnight rambler live with a whole bunch of uh mick on harmonica so you

[45:21]didn't hear any of his harmonica but you couldn't hear any of it it was so good i think compared to

[45:26]like the dylan harmonica it was so good but to hear that live so we wanted to go through the

[45:30]complete set list i can do it real quick if you want russell only for you because

[45:34]i'm sorry because i feel so bad because it was the rolling stones and it was like they're 78 and

[45:44]you're never gonna be able to see him ever again and it was such a good concert you know and there

[45:48]was like i'm trying not to i literally i don't think i can tell you one song they played i

[45:53]street fighting man great you know then let's spend the night together 19th nervous breakdown

[45:59]that tumbling

[46:00]dice tumbling dice live awesome monkey man monkey man they don't play monkey man live that's like

[46:06]every movie you've ever heard it was so good monkey man live fool to cry you can't always get

[46:11]what you want to hear that live was worth it that you can't always do that one about your mom doing

[46:16]the laundry it's a classic a lot of people are talking about that didn't do that one uh living

[46:21]in a ghost town didn't know that one they played start me up then they played honky tonk woman

[46:25]the real version not the one off let it bleed but still off let it bleed so they played that

[46:30]connection and before they make me run which was keith richards was singing horrible i mean they

[46:35]just let me get a break there yeah yeah yeah miss you midnight rambler live it was like a 12 13 minute

[46:42]jam session i'd love to hear miss you oh that'd be good it was so good painted black sympathy for

[46:47]the devil jump a jack flash then they said good night we'll see it came back out for an encore

[46:52]give me shelter and then satisfaction it was so good you know what i didn't have satisfaction in

[46:57]the double gin and tonics that you charge guess what they charge you

[47:00]for two double gin and tonics 47 49 oh

[47:04]oh russell i feel so bad

[47:11]that's horrible is this where we peel back the curtain for our listeners and tell them that in

[47:16]the pre-show matt was like yeah i just gotta i might i just might i might mention the show just

[47:20]a couple things i might just i might just i didn't know russell was going this route i mean i feel

[47:26]it was a complete bomb but i'm glad you had fun man there were so many people

[47:30]there and it looked like a fun event but i i just wasn't not able to have the same experience you

[47:35]did i i gotta admit i had a feeling some of those up so i did pull that sound clip like that didn't

[47:39]just come out well i better pull this up just to make sure it was good rob rolling going how's it

[47:46]going with you well okay so let me ask you guys a serious question here that's gonna get edited out

[47:50]we're at 53 minutes i've got a long story i i think i'll save it for next week does that sound

[47:54]good i'll just do it i'll do a short one yeah you're let's just do a short one i don't want to

[48:00]run out of energy on this one and that was those were so good if you want to cut my story down too

[48:04]you can do that oh uh yeah let me think about that russell's story where he's in agony for an

[48:11]entire date and it's one of the funniest things i've ever heard and if i could grind it up and

[48:16]snort it i would do it right now without hesitation i would quit my job to listen to that story 10

[48:20]more times like i wouldn't even biggest part of the story though is the whole time i'm thinking

[48:23]my date might not go out with me again like i'm clearly annoyed but then like it became clear she

[48:28]was also annoyed by it

[48:30]all the things that were going on also annoyed we couldn't hear yeah russell the thing is to me

[48:34]that's just an average friday night for me that is not a big deal like two people annoyed at the

[48:38]end of a date who cares man did you bring your wife to the rolling stones concert

[48:42]no see you with that is the goal you are trying to you are trying to meet somebody so you can

[48:47]marry them and then never bring them to another concert again you can do whatever you want that

[48:52]is that is the ultimate that's that's what we're trying to do here uh so i've got i've got

[48:57]something just written down here i've got two things i want to talk about number one i just

[49:00]wrote down mexican buffet question mark why aren't there more somebody on my facebook goes hey can

[49:05]somebody recommend a mexican buffet for me and everyone afterwards is like those don't exist

[49:10]that is not a thing never has that existed that has never been a thing why isn't that a thing a

[49:15]mexican buffet would be awesome i would love a mexican buffet why don't you just go through taco

[49:19]bell it's not a russ i want a buffet i want to be able to see like oh that chimichanga looks good

[49:26]oh an enchilada that looks good oh i would love a torta something like that

[49:29]those all sound really yeah if taco bell was a buffet guess what i'd love it and you know what

[49:34]i used to love those pizza hut buffets remember those were pizza hut oh yes all the pizza and

[49:39]you'd be like maybe i should have just dessert pizza today for me i wonder how i'll do in school

[49:44]after i eat 10 pieces of dessert pizza at noon and then go sit into the class for two hours

[49:49]if you have for me it was the indian buffet i couldn't resist the indian buffet anywhere any

[49:53]city anywhere i'm anywhere i am and always just like need a nap straight away like can't but i do

[49:59]matt do you like any sort of buffet no i don't know i've never i matt i used to go to all the

[50:07]all the time matt he said this he said this episode what if you went to a buffet and just

[50:12]chose a single menu however buffet just ate the same thing is that i mean like you do you ever

[50:18]really know like how your food is prepared unless they're cooking in front of you let's be very

[50:22]clear every year we go to vegas matt makes a point to go to the aria buffet all we talk about the

[50:29]when we were going to go and it's gotten to the point where man says i don't care if anyone comes

[50:33]with me i'm going you've eaten at the buffet by yourself before right yes i mean that's like that's

[50:38]not a buffet that that's somehow it seems like more fun than russell's date but it still is a

[50:42]pretty sad scene yeah so why do you not like buffets again because the food's been okay so

[50:47]long right yeah i mean you know if you're gonna pay a hundred bucks for a buffet or 50 bucks you

[50:51]know it's a little different than going to like the old country buffet for 8.99 all you can eat

[50:54]kind of a thing hundred bucks that sounds like a deal to russell he would love that

[50:59]but seeing like you know you kind of see when like the pork loin or the you know whatever it

[51:08]is meatloaf when it's been sitting out just a little too long and you're just like oh i just

[51:12]don't want to eat that i don't know and so i just i i just i've gone to too many of them

[51:17]with baseball teams and basketball teams and you know all that stuff because that's how you go and

[51:22]eat a whole bunch of food for cheap but it's just it just grosses me out now to see all those people

[51:26]just putting everything in and uh i don't know i just can't do it anymore so

[51:29]why does every other uh ethnic food have buffets except for mexican food why is there no mexican

[51:35]food buffets what is the reason that's all is that a million dollar idea should we have a beck did a

[51:39]better uh mexican buffet it's a better name yeah better name than that what could go wrong for the

[51:44]four of us opening a mexican buffet no problem everyone yeah no no issues there guys i'd love

[51:49]to go into business with you everything i've done so far makes me think we would be a well-oiled

[51:53]machine and nothing i mean it's a fair question right because many of their dishes are stews and

[51:59]beans it's not that different from cuisines like uh indian but maybe it's just that they

[52:05]maybe the economic models never made sense like you want to sell more tacos you don't want people

[52:10]just like spooning giant plates of quesada on and running away with it just i like how you're

[52:17]thinking here just people taking tons of queso like yes this is the best buffet ever listen i i

[52:23]knew i couldn't tell a story better than russell's i didn't want to try mexican buffet question mark

[52:29]we're going to go with that today i think it's time for us to get into nobody's favorite part

[52:33]of the album let's talk about the album oh this is a music podcast robert are you doing the essay

[52:38]again this week i am and i'm going to talk nice and slow for you so you can understand what i'm

[52:43]saying nice uh and again i'm sorry to everyone that i'm not telling the story that russell just

[52:49]already told because that is obviously that's our mount everest we've already we don't have to we

[52:53]don't have to keep bringing it up do i need to show you my t-shirt here like we don't have to

[52:56]keep bringing it up i mean i'm going to keep bringing it up just like you walking up the

[52:59]stairs to section 303 where you're sitting right in front and you were terrified and then you got

[53:03]in a big fight with a couple next to you classic let's see that do you have the t-shirt can we see

[53:08]it yep one sec oh he's leaving the podcast guys he took that's it that is so funny his date was

[53:17]such a disaster that makes me laugh so fucking hard oh god i could pay if i could pay money to

[53:21]watch a video of that i would it would be so good so but you know he did everything he could on the

[53:27]date i think i think he tried you know it's just so intense

[53:29]i went to the concert and all i got was this lousy t-shirt oh that's a good one though it's

[53:36]got the big rolling stone tongue with the kind of the flag on it they only had a couple available

[53:41]man i didn't think they had they didn't have everything that america yep yeah russell sees

[53:46]on the back says trump 2024 he's like oh no i didn't know they stuck one by me

[53:52]no wonder it was the only one worth only 200 the others were made way more expensive rest aside

[53:58]this i'll say

[53:59]guys guess what i'm gonna save some more money on this date it's worked out every time when i'm

[54:02]trying to save money i'm gonna do it again i think it's a great idea i don't even want to look at the

[54:06]shirt anymore now i'm afraid something's gonna be on it that i'm not happy about

[54:09]49 for two drinks 49

[54:14]russell is gonna be the only person who flies out to new york is like wow everything is so

[54:20]cheap out here this is great i love it in the early 60s there was a strict dichotomy in music

[54:25]pop stations played white music and if you wanted to hear sam cook or

[54:29]jackie wilson you need to tune into black radio stations the goal of many black artists were to

[54:34]find that elusive crossover hit that could be played on pop radio so they could get that extra

[54:38]million record sales that comes when you have a number one hit brown had a hit with please please

[54:43]please in 1956 and kept grinding away and he didn't get another one for three years with try me

[54:48]while he was looking at it for another hit he spent the previous six years on the chitlin circuit an

[54:53]all-black touring schedule in the south brown had been perfecting his electric stage show and was

[54:59]one of the first new york city at harlem's apollo theater when he arrived there he played six shows

[55:03]a day and the lines would continuously snake around the theater instead of looking for a

[55:07]single that would become a hit he decided to take what was hitting now and share it with the world

[55:12]he decided to take a chance and finance his own recording of his live show brown recorded the

[55:17]album and begged the head of king records to release it but was repeatedly turned down because

[55:21]who would want to hear an album with songs that were already released as singles and it was well

[55:25]known that every live album turned out to be a real dud the album was a hit and it was a hit and

[55:29]the album was not only an instant classic it showed a side of james brown's live performance

[55:32]that would be his trademark the screams from the crowd during the eight minute version of night

[55:36]train left it up to the listener's imagination what brown must have been doing to elicit such

[55:41]cheers from the apollo crowd this album ended up spending 66 weeks on the billboard album chart

[55:46]peaking at number two and it sold over a million copies while this album made james brown a

[55:51]household name in both black and white households it's truly a testament to how driven brown was to

[55:56]be a success and now let's listen to the legend of the album the album was a success and it was

[55:58]legendary live at the apollo with james brown nice coming your way star time are you ready for star

[56:06]time i'm ready for it oh god ready star time thank you and thank you very much i've listened

[56:11]to russ's story i don't have enough time great place to present to you at this particular time

[56:14]national and international known as their hottest working man we're gonna listen to this saying i'll

[56:21]go crazy yeah take him to church so horns on this are green aren't they unbelievable

[56:28]you know what's funny is they were looking for this for the masters to this forever they could

[56:35]not release a cd version of this because they had lost the masters and somebody was digging around

[56:39]in a crate looking for some other band and they go oh james brown apollo show too they're like i

[56:44]think we've been looking for this for a long time they're finally able to release it on like a cd

[56:48]version of it latest release night train let's everybody shout and shimmy all right i'm gonna

[56:56]i own this cd

[56:58]but i don't anymore but when i used to own cds i owned this one and one of the times that my truck

[57:06]got broken into in minneapolis this cd was sitting one of the times how many times were there three

[57:12]times three times not even that far from matt's neighborhood back in the day and one of the times

[57:18]this cd was sitting on the seat of the car they stole my checkbook they did not steal this cd

[57:24]which i gotta tell you at the time this cd was far more valuable than my checkbook

[57:28]jokes on that guy trying to write a hundred dollar check at outback steakhouse

[57:35]i i just love the intro on this song when you listen to this this album and you start with

[57:42]with that intro it just puts you in a in a mood to enjoy the music and i'm gonna go a little

[57:46]different style this week we're gonna do a list here on the greatest intros in live album history

[57:52]oh i love this i can't wait we're breaking the list

[57:58]right off the bat and normally i've scolded aaron for doing this before but i'm going against the

[58:04]rules we're gonna try it out you're the master list maker man you do what you first song on the

[58:08]list matt i believe you had listened to this band recently the band is kiss the album is alive 1975

[58:14]check out the intro to kiss this is this is one of my favorite of all time

[58:28]you wanted the best and you got it you got it and then just the guitar i mean it's so good i say that

[58:34]the number of times where i've said in my life you wanted the best you got it it's just it's

[58:38]the perfect introduction it's so good 305 on the list and i did text you guys that i have

[58:43]i don't get kiss you guys are gonna have to explain it to me i get it i'm i hope russell's

[58:48]doing what i think he's gonna do oh aaron i'm just about to smack things around aren't i i'll tell

[58:52]you what man uh if you haven't heard of kiss they're actually one of the hottest bands in the

[58:56]nation yeah

[58:58]matt you should really like this because you're talking you've got a you may be having a roadie

[59:02]gig coming up and it turns out that the person who came up with that line for kiss was actually

[59:06]the roadie and then the the line is kind of morphed over time with kiss so there's always

[59:11]a little bit different version of it but it was the roadie who came up with it matt so when you

[59:15]have your roadie gig coming up maybe you can introduce the hottest band in the land pressure's

[59:19]on i think what's really weird is that the newest version is you wanted the best but you didn't want

[59:23]to pay so now you're sitting up in section 303 and you're terrified

[59:28]wait we're still making fun of me for this we're not done uh i'm gonna get a time machine and go

[59:34]uh forward 10 weeks give me a second uh yeah it turns out we're still talking about it 10 weeks

[59:39]hey you can at least do the smoke and the rivets and all the whole deal if you're gonna do the time

[59:44]machine bit at least let me laugh well sometimes you want the best and you don't fucking get it

[59:51]so here's the intro from gnr live this is night train

[59:58]isn't that the biggest like middle finger to kiss yeah i was so badass russell i was praying for

[60:15]this one just praying for it you hear the train horn there when they started they did a little

[60:21]train no i missed that i was busy congratulating russell for this choice i think for once aaron

[60:26]you should go back and listen to one of our episodes because you hear a little

[60:29]like it's the corniest you know what fuck it i'll edit this out but i'm gonna play it for you

[60:33]just because i think it's so funny aaron you're impressed with that oh let's play it again i want

[60:38]to hear it again so here's what you get from hollywood

[60:42]yeah i was yelling at the uber driver with that voice

[60:50]so you can just you can picture somebody's going like you want the best

[60:56]fucking make it and then they take out one of those train whistles that you buy

[60:59]i like the picture axles up there the little train was like

[61:08]next up on the list this is one of aaron's favorites he's always brought this this

[61:16]group up this is art blakely a night at birdland volume one check out the intro here

[61:21]russell is on base and let's get together and bring art blakey to the

[61:26]bandstand with a great big round of applause how about a big hand oh this is nice

[61:30]is that bad ass or what that's so good is that sample in something oh man i'm gonna give it to

[61:38]you all right so this is this was this guy named peewee marquette and he worked at all these jazz

[61:43]clubs the birdland was this jazz club i think it's in new york 52nd street maybe somewhere in there

[61:48]rob so he was he was kind of this famous hype man for all these jazz bands who would come in

[61:53]and so he kind of was the hype guy and this was this famous thing but we

[61:56]have heard we have heard that sampled in something wait a minute it's us3 flip fantasia

[62:02]yes all right russell that's so nice

[62:13]yes this list this list is making up for that's oh i like these are all playing off one another

[62:21]it's so good yeah who do you think out of the four of us would be the best jazz hype man

[62:26]who would be the best introduction man for a jazz band at a 100 man

[62:30]thanks for coming here these guys always have your seats and um enjoy the music thanks for

[62:39]coming feel free to feel free to grab a drink

[62:42]i'm about to make hand now

[62:46]it'd be so good i would do it but it would take me like 15 minutes to intro it i'd be like tell

[62:52]a story and then be like mexican buffets what's the deal with those

[62:56]there's this guy i know he went to the rolling stones concert it really sucked

[63:00]here's i'm gonna tell you all about it greatest concert i've ever been to this is the greatest

[63:03]story next up on the list we need to cover this one aaron you have actually talked about this

[63:09]album once before this is bb king live at cook county rob if you hold on a second so the the

[63:14]person who introduces this introduces bb king first we're going to listen to the bb king

[63:18]introduction but there's something really cool about it you guys have to check out so you can

[63:22]hit that rob i picture me intro introing people at the jazz club i'm like hey everybody's the art

[63:26]lakey band uh and then russell's up top going what what are you saying i can't understand you

[63:32]i bought cheap tickets i made another terrible mistake all right so check out this is where

[63:39]this is where they're introducing bb king at live at cook county cook county is that right yeah

[63:43]this is kind of a mat

[63:50]got some blues going on

[63:53]chairman of the board

[63:56]so it's kind of a cool little intro but the coolest thing about this intro i've never heard

[64:05]this before this lady who introduces him before she introduced him she also introduces the sheriff

[64:10]who gets booed and then the judge who gets booed out of the building check it out go to 102 rob you

[64:15]guys have to listen to this another dear friend of all of yours out there is the chief justice of

[64:22]the criminal court

[64:26]that is so funny yeah what did they think was gonna happen like what did they think was gonna

[64:38]happen i mean can you imagine you're like okay big concert cook county jail i'm so hyped i'm gonna get

[64:44]the crowd hyped all right here we have a judge who pulled most of you people here

[64:48]okay here's bb king you'd be like wait i don't understand why they're booing

[64:53]it's a great introduction isn't it it's so funny

[64:56]oh my god all right last song on the list this is a band we just talked about recently this is

[65:01]steely dan this is i don't know how you pronounce it bode isavata or something live version of this

[65:06]album and check out the intro here this was their truck driver and an mc he got a little liquored up

[65:12]and he could not recall whether steely dan was a person or a band

[65:17]yes

[65:18]the magnificent ones

[65:21]mr steely

[65:26]is that a great introduction or what yeah so i'm not the only one who doesn't know whether

[65:38]steely dan is a vibrator a person or a band russell that was so good that was easily a

[65:43]top five list another i thought it was fun better list by russell and it was free you didn't spend

[65:48]a couple hundred bucks doing that i think that's great oh yeah can you imagine that guy like the

[65:53]next day he has to introduce van morris and he's like this is the worst job i've missed her a lot

[65:56]van morris are the band i don't know all right so let's go crazy let's get into uh the album i'll go

[66:06]crazy

[66:07]i think i hear i mean i hear john bonham everywhere now that we've listened to led zeppelin but

[66:22]i feel like he listened to the drumming on this record they can just hear these triplets going

[66:26]on yeah i like the drumming on this one yeah the the sound quality of this live show is so good like

[66:32]there's something about the how they mic the crowd where they're so loud you can hear you can hear

[66:38]every instrument in my mind really perfectly but the crowd is it's almost like you're there when

[66:42]you have headphones on listening to it it's so good that song was produced performed at the

[66:47]kennedy center honors which russell loves to bring up absolutely uh if he's going to go there he's

[66:52]going to sit way up top uh i'm sorry i'll stop

[66:55]you

[66:56]and you know who performed that song when james brown was inducted into the kennedy

[67:01]kennedy center honors might as well have been the rolling stones i wouldn't have known the

[67:04]difference anyways somebody uh probably one of the greatest blues singers of all time i mean

[67:11]think about who could it be that could pay tribute to somebody as great as james brown

[67:14]who could it be that could represent that whole like you know coming from nothing and getting

[67:20]everything and the hardest working man in show business it was dan akroyd dan akroyd who

[67:26]not oh no who is the guy it's not good we are the world video you're always like what the fuck is

[67:32]dan akroyd and instead he's doing james brown at the kennedy center for james brown can you imagine

[67:39]james brown is there he's watching instead you see dan akroyd what a nightmare well james brown

[67:45]was in the movie the blues brothers they've got they've got to have some sort of friendship he

[67:50]was in the movie oh that's right he was the preacher in the movie one of the best scenes

[67:54]in that movie that was about the scene right after that is where that movie got really really

[67:58]long for me i remember when i was older i was like oh i love the blues brothers i used to watch all

[68:01]the time and then i remember that i would only watch like 10 minute segments of it when you watch

[68:06]that whole movie it's like three hours long it's it's a long ass movie there's some great music in

[68:10]there but man that is a long movie the highlight of that scene is where john belushi is doing cart

[68:14]wheels and like that man is too fat to be running up and down like that the highlight i love it

[68:22]cocaine's a bad drug man it's a hell of a drug try me for using that hey it's like cocaine said

[68:28]to dan akroyd try me let's all listen to that reaction i know that first note when the bat when

[68:35]the crowd knows what it is i mean this was the one that was his first hit to make the billboard top

[68:43]200 listen to the bass on this like listen to this bass just sing on here so carl pruitt aaron

[68:49]is that who it is i should have looked that up russell

[68:52]nice well it's so funny because the original you know his first hit was really please please

[68:56]please which is just him saying please please please over and over and then he took all the

[69:00]writing credit for that song gave nobody else any money for it and his band goes guess what

[69:03]we're out of here screw you and then he once again did this with try me he said listen somebody at a

[69:09]club gave me the song i'm gonna sing it he gave it to his guitar player helped him write it did

[69:13]all of it and then james brown gave absolutely no writing credit to anyone else once again took

[69:18]all of it for himself it's a classic james brown story instrumental we got a little

[69:22]rental break here please listen to this i mean this i think this would be another record where

[69:29]you put it on and be like i gotta call somebody and come over and listen to this crazy think

[69:35]the thing about listening to this too without without seeing it is there is some really great

[69:48]footage of james brown and the and the famous flames on youtube

[69:52]and we're missing half or more of what's really going on because he was such an entertainer i

[69:57]mean this band is so tight vocals are great but who like how could you even imagine what the

[70:02]what the real feeling was like watching him dance watching him perform control the stage but that's

[70:07]what i mean you hear the crowd go nuts and you're like he must be doing something so awesome right

[70:12]like you just must be doing like the craziest dance movie ever seen in your life and you know

[70:16]what a lot of people say about that song russell it's one of the first funk songs of all time okay

[70:21]i don't know if you've heard that before but it's one of the first funk songs of all time

[70:22]a lot of people are saying that it beats actually on the ones i could i i don't have time to go

[70:26]through it right now but i could give you a cool uh little lesson if you want to listen i'm kind

[70:29]of curious how did how did the fact that we listened to 85 hours of james brown songs three

[70:35]months ago impact your enjoyment of this album zero i loved it i love that and i love this i

[70:42]thought it was it was super fun to listen like once again when i was at work sitting down to

[70:46]listen to this i was excited every time got you for me it made me enjoy it more i i remember

[70:52]that i had previously read uh not really a biography of james brown but sort of like a

[70:57]search for his roots his origins by james bride and james mcbride attributed the phrase kill him

[71:03]and leave to james brown where he he would say get in get out leave him wanting more and so i

[71:07]like that this album kills him and leaves we've 31 minutes of music and it's gone and then i'm

[71:11]like man i wish i could listen to that again yeah i definitely got killed and wanted more at rolling

[71:15]stones i could have wanted one song that i could have understood i mean think russell you could

[71:19]have listened to this album once waiting in line to get in the first time and then you're like oh

[71:22]a second time when you're waiting in another line to see if you could get a person another time

[71:26]while you're trying to get a shirt and then another time when you're down on the concourse

[71:29]listening to the rolling stones you i mean it's great next time i go to a concert i'm just going

[71:33]to bring my beats by dre headphones and if i have to listen to it through my phone i'll do it

[71:37]good instrumental

[71:40]love it it's fast and you know what i don't mind

[71:47]listen here the guitar player comes

[71:52]in early when they recorded it so he always does every time they play it live too right there

[71:57]oh nice

[72:01]my favorite thing to think about listening this album was where would like where do you think

[72:09]james brown would have ranked this particular performance in all of his live performances like

[72:13]this is an iconic live album and it might have been just an average probably just a tuesday

[72:19]forum right yeah right yeah well as i said i think it's a great album and i think it's a great album

[72:22]if somebody who often listens to their own live performances in great detail i can tell you he

[72:26]probably hates every minute of it and has nothing but regret for anything he's done or said and can

[72:31]think of a million better ways to do it later all the choices that led him up to this it's kind of

[72:36]like a pro wrestler like hulk hogan has thousands of matches but he like his match versus andre the

[72:42]giant might not be his favorite one or he might have had sex with his wife's friend's girlfriend

[72:46]or whatever numerous times but it's not nearly as memorable as the other one is it rob no absolutely

[72:52]you know what when i forever james brown and hulk hogan are going to be interlinked in my mind i think

[72:57]that's brilliant russell brilliant guys this might surprise you it's another instrumental

[73:02]is this like is he doing a costume change here like i bet he is or some dance moves yeah oh my

[73:09]god so great uh so this is uh lost someone this is kind of the highlight of the entire album it's

[73:15]an 11 minute song and he starts low i've got a couple i've got three different clips he starts

[73:22]You can just tell he is so good at getting the crowd whipped up into just a fervor.

[73:26]Listen to this.

[73:27]As soon as they know what it is, right?

[73:38]That's why I picture us doing our first live show.

[73:40]We walk out and it's just Magic Mike.

[73:42]And then the psycho emailed us today and they're out there screaming.

[73:45]And as soon as you're starting with in, they could go for it.

[73:50]Russell's date is way up in the balcony like I saved $3 being up here.

[73:53]I think the good thing, though, is if we ever did do a live show, I would save money because my wife would not show up at all.

[73:59]She'd just be like, I'm sorry, I don't have time.

[74:01]We'd be telling jokes like I don't get any of this rolling going.

[74:04]What are you guys talking about?

[74:05]Matt, what do you think of the album so far?

[74:09]We're almost at the end of it.

[74:10]Are you a James Brown guy or not?

[74:11]Not really.

[74:12]I mean, I think I hear this album and I just want to see him live.

[74:18]I feel like I think Rosie kind of brought it up.

[74:21]You're hearing about like 10% of what the actual experience is.

[74:24]And the only reason I've got this live album is because he never recorded an actual album, which I don't know if he would actually record an album if it'd be all that great.

[74:33]Because the live show and everything he brings in the energy, I mean, that's that's the whole act.

[74:39]That's why he was so brilliant.

[74:40]And so it's just it's not my cup of tea from listening to it over and over kind of a thing.

[74:45]So, you know, I certainly understand his place.

[74:48]He's in history and it's great, but it's just not my cup of tea.

[74:51]I was inspired by this album today.

[74:53]I showed some clips of James Brown doing his show in Boston after MLK was assassinated to a bunch of seventh graders.

[75:00]So these are like 12 year old kids in the age of TikTok.

[75:03]They were absolutely hypnotized by a black and white video of James Brown performing like he is so magnetic and electric when you're watching him.

[75:11]It's just crazy.

[75:11]You didn't you didn't tell me it was going to be a little nudity or something.

[75:14]And that's just a little.

[75:18]A little bit.

[75:19]But don't worry about it.

[75:19]I'm glad somebody's listening to me here.

[75:21]That is about the you know, I've gotten so much runway out of that joke and everybody loves it.

[75:26]The fact that you tell seven is a good joke.

[75:28]If you know if you're going to wait, guys, it's just it might be a little nudity here.

[75:31]Let's just try to be adults about it.

[75:33]Wait, where was the nudity?

[75:35]Oh, that's so funny.

[75:37]I'm in a room of 30 kids just talking and chatting, totally ignoring everything.

[75:40]And I say, who wrote this swear word up here?

[75:42]And they all want to see written swear words so bad.

[75:46]They all look at that.

[75:47]I say, OK, now that I have your attention.

[75:49]Here's my rule.

[75:50]Matt, Matt, you were mentioning like Rob's jokes.

[75:54]Matt and Aaron, do you ever do you ever co-op Rob's jokes and use them like your own or not?

[75:59]Yeah.

[75:59]Nope.

[76:00]No, no.

[76:02]The one I do is that I do in meetings at work.

[76:05]I do the all right.

[76:07]I try to use that as transition to keep things moving.

[76:11]Yeah.

[76:11]All right.

[76:12]So I'm sure I'm a big fraud.

[76:15]I copy everything.

[76:16]You know, I don't have a.

[76:18]I don't have a thought in my brain that didn't come from somebody else.

[76:21]So I'm sure I've used a number of your all of your guys' lines at some point or other.

[76:26]So I'd like to think of Aaron being in a Zoom meeting, be like, OK, which segment are we in?

[76:29]Is this the rolling going or is this?

[76:30]What's the rating?

[76:31]What's the rating system?

[76:32]Aaron goes on like a 10 minute rant about some vegetable he ate the other day and everyone's looking at him like, who the fuck is this guy?

[76:39]He just randomly calls his co-workers a dumb shit list.

[76:45]Hey, is it time for us to play a voice?

[76:48]So this is the middle of lost someone.

[76:53]Listen, listen, say, say, yeah, listen to this.

[76:55]Those muted trumpets.

[77:01]This is how he gets them right here.

[77:08]Oh, yeah, it's just.

[77:15]It's just the king.

[77:18]It's just.

[77:18]Electric.

[77:19]You cannot not listen to him.

[77:21]Here we have the medley and listen to them go crazy when they hear that he's playing his hit songs.

[77:26]Oh, there's a great line in the Mr. Dynamite HBO movie where they were talking about James Brown's Please, Please, Please.

[77:37]And the guy at the record guy was like, why would anybody buy this?

[77:40]It's just him saying, please, please, please, like a million times.

[77:43]And instead, people go absolutely crazy.

[77:44]Whatever that band's tight as hell.

[77:46]That feels like a proto pretty shuffle that didn't.

[77:48]Dun, dun, dun, dun.

[77:49]But I hear that everywhere.

[77:50]That's what I thought, too.

[77:52]I was more.

[77:53]I thought it was a halftime shuffle.

[77:54]It might have been Russell.

[77:55]I don't know this shit.

[77:56]I'm just kidding.

[77:59]I don't know either.

[77:59]But I was essentially screaming, please, at the ticket guy when they wouldn't let us in the no bag line.

[78:05]I was like, please, you got to shove that thing down your back, the small of your back and put your sweatshirt over it and walk right by him.

[78:13]And they're not even going to put it in the crotch of your pants.

[78:15]And then you're going to win twice there.

[78:18]You got the person.

[78:18]Everybody's impressed.

[78:19]You're set.

[78:20]And you wanted to do this to the guy that took it.

[78:22]He wasn't holding a tiny purse.

[78:25]He's only a tiny purse.

[78:27]And then they're like, you want a single thing at a time?

[78:33]He's like, I think I need a double.

[78:34]Hey, sweetie, can we stop and get a shirt for the Rolling Stones?

[78:39]And then when they actually listen to the concert, it actually sounds more like this.

[78:45]Wait, wait.

[78:48]I can't hear it.

[78:48]When the second guy at the second line wouldn't let us in and wouldn't tell us where we could get in.

[78:54]I asked for his name and then took a picture of his badge.

[78:57]I don't know what good it was going to do me, but I was like, I'm just going to be an asshole about this.

[79:00]You took a picture of his badge.

[79:03]Yeah, I was just I was just hoping I was trying to do anything to get in the door.

[79:07]I was like, maybe if I threatened to take like ask for his name and report him to a supervisor, maybe he'll let us in.

[79:12]But he wasn't having any.

[79:13]Hey, hey, hey.

[79:15]Please, please.

[79:18]This is Russell telling the guy next to his date to move his leg over.

[79:22]Oh, my God.

[79:23]This is me talking to Mick Jagger.

[79:24]Can I please understand the lyrics?

[79:26]How does it go, Rob?

[79:27]What is he singing out there?

[79:34]I think he's singing Bees of Burden.

[79:36]I love this song.

[79:37]This is what I when I go to ask for a return on the T-shirts because I don't realize they're one hundred twenty five combined dollars.

[79:45]What would I say?

[79:48]This is Russell begging.

[79:52]Seeing Matt, Matt's dad, pick up him like a parent picking up somebody after homecoming.

[79:57]And he's trying to get the Uber over to the other side of the stadium.

[79:59]Please, please, please, please, please pick us up.

[80:05]Here's his date next time they go to a concert.

[80:08]Hey, can we just sit on the floor, please?

[80:11]Do we have to go up and sit in the upper seats?

[80:13]Please, please, please, please.

[80:18]I'm wondering what would have happened if Russell asked Matt if Matt's dad had space for it.

[80:24]Russell and his date in Matt's dad's ride.

[80:27]How would that have gone?

[80:28]Are you sure?

[80:28]I would have driven by.

[80:30]They would have driven by.

[80:31]This is what I would have heard.

[80:32]I mean, really, all Russell got out of this date was a shirt, some memories, a lower Uber rating, and then a picture of some guy's badge that he still has.

[80:48]That's what I'm saying.

[80:48]I'm wondering what would have happened if Russell asked Matt if Matt's dad had space for it.

[80:48]It's going to come up and infuriate Russell every time.

[80:51]Don't delete that picture, Russell.

[80:52]Every time you see it, I want you to be reminded of this date.

[80:54]But your story about taking the picture of the badge makes me realize, I think you could tell more.

[81:00]I was trying anything to get in.

[81:01]I was trying anything.

[81:02]I was saying.

[81:04]It makes me think that there's layers to this date that you didn't tell us about.

[81:10]And it makes me think maybe you should just tell the same story next week.

[81:13]And I would be so happy of just a slightly different version.

[81:16]To be fair, I will give you a warning.

[81:18]I actually ran part of the rolling going by my date to ensure that I had my interaction with the people next to us accurately because I didn't want to misrepresent what I said or what other people were saying because I thought I would get called out on that if the person ever listened.

[81:35]Oh, that never happens.

[81:36]I just want to acknowledge the significance of Russell sharing his rolling going with his date.

[81:44]I want to I want to acknowledge how significant it is.

[81:46]Are you saying this is like a step?

[81:48]Is this like step?

[81:48]I think it's a step in our podcast that we're moving forward, that we are, we're, we're what, fifth date worthy at this point.

[81:55]That's how much better we've gotten at the podcast game.

[81:58]Russell getting married would be one of the greatest disasters of this podcast.

[82:02]Look how bad this concert went.

[82:04]Can you imagine how bad that would go?

[82:05]They'd be making me move my own statues and shit.

[82:08]I'll tell you this.

[82:09]Russell, Russell went into the corner on a couple episodes ago and I had a number of people text me like, what?

[82:17]What?

[82:18]He's going back into the dating corner.

[82:20]What, what's going on?

[82:21]What's happening?

[82:22]People are, people are concerned, Russell.

[82:25]I know they were concerned.

[82:28]This relationship, this relationship is an, is a iceberg for our Titanic that we're sailing around on this thing.

[82:34]You need to avoid it at all costs.

[82:37]We are going full speed.

[82:37]We simply don't have the time.

[82:38]We got to go faster.

[82:39]But I do enjoy the idea of Russell, like asking his date, like Russell's asking his date.

[82:45]Hey, can I tell the story?

[82:45]She's like, no, it's so embarrassing.

[82:47]And he's like.

[82:48]And then Matt is over at his mother-in-law's and she says, hey, what, what vegetables do you even like?

[82:58]And she's, and he's like, peas, peas, peas.

[83:01]And then I'm with my father-in-law and we're out looking at the pigs and I'm like, deez, deez, deez.

[83:12]Nuts.

[83:18]Russell, can you, can you please, uh, how many, um, how many shirts do we want?

[83:25]Oh, I want three.

[83:26]Tees, tees, tees.

[83:29]That's going to be, uh, $900.

[83:30]You know what?

[83:33]If, if I were, if I were going to be the hype man for Art Blakely or a jazz group, they would call me peewee, peewee, peewee, peewee, peewee.

[83:43]Guys, I don't want this to ever end.

[83:50]I'm not going to lie.

[83:51]All right.

[83:52]Guys, just like somebody played that train.

[83:55]It was a whoo, whoo.

[83:56]It's time for the night train.

[83:57]Oh yeah.

[84:03]Amazing song.

[84:05]If you guys remember last time we listened to James Brown, I got the book booze and vinyl and there was a cocktail inside B.

[84:12]It was called.

[84:13]Oh, yeah.

[84:13]If you remember, right, it was the espresso drink where I had no espresso.

[84:17]So I had to sub in the caramel, caramel, whatever it was called.

[84:22]The caramel Bailey's salty caramel Bailey's, right?

[84:25]Actually, there was another drink in, in the book.

[84:33]It's called the godfather after the godfather of soul.

[84:36]Do you guys ever had a godfather before?

[84:38]No, no.

[84:38]I'm having a godfather.

[84:41]It has whiskey.

[84:43]It has whiskey.

[84:44]Amaretto.

[84:47]Yes.

[84:47]And an orange.

[84:48]It also called for some laugh rag, laugh rag or something.

[84:54]You guys know what that one is?

[84:55]The real smoky one.

[84:57]That's a smoky scotch.

[84:58]It's a very smoky thing, but it called for it to be put in with a bar spoon and I don't have a bar spoon.

[85:03]So I wasn't going to do it.

[85:04]So tonight I'm enjoying a godfather drink and it's pretty good.

[85:08]Actually.

[85:08]Cheers to the godfather.

[85:10]Bar spoon.

[85:11]What's the difference between a regular spoon, Matt?

[85:13]I went into the top or I went into the, uh, total wine and I said, please, do you have

[85:23]any sort of bar spoons?

[85:25]I said, please, please, please.

[85:27]It's really good, but I'm not a scotch drinker.

[85:38]You guys, a scotch drinker.

[85:40]So I refuse to buy a full bottle.

[85:41]I bought three airplane bottles.

[85:43]Cause I did not want to have a bottle of scotch.

[85:45]I'm not into it.

[85:46]I like scotch.

[85:47]Geez, man.

[85:48]You could have sent it out here.

[85:49]I was wondering, I was like, Jesus, Russell has huge hands, but you're just holding the

[85:53]little airplane bottle.

[85:54]That's what it was.

[85:54]Oh, wait.

[85:56]I just got a text.

[85:56]I just got a text from Russell.

[85:57]It says dick pick for you.

[85:59]It's a scotch bottle.

[86:00]And it said, please, please, please open it.

[86:04]Right, Rob?

[86:05]Please.

[86:06]Please.

[86:08]Rob, you've talked a number of times about being a little bit, you know, the, the dairy

[86:13]gives your tummy a little upset, right?

[86:15]Yeah.

[86:15]Every once in a while.

[86:16]Yeah.

[86:16]So every once in a while you gotta, you know, you gotta hold the cheese, cheese, cheese.

[86:23]This is me praying.

[86:30]I don't have any pee stains on my pants when I go back to class.

[86:32]I'm like checking in the mirror, but I gotta like also like move my stomach around.

[86:40]I wanted to show you this last part.

[86:43]This is, Night Train's the last song, but I wanted to show you this part where he does

[86:46]this acapella switch up.

[86:47]Think about the, how confident you would need to be as a singer to pull this off.

[86:50]Listen to this.

[86:50]All aboard for New York City.

[86:52]Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[86:54]New York.

[86:56]Are you ready for the night train?

[86:59]Yeah.

[86:59]Are you ready for the night train?

[87:01]Are you ready?

[87:02]Yeah.

[87:02]Night.

[87:03]Ah.

[87:04]Yes.

[87:05]And who was in the crowd?

[87:08]The young Axl Rose with a train whistle.

[87:10]Yeah.

[87:13]I think it's fun though, Rob.

[87:15]I think, I think James Brown was clearly gifted, extraordinarily gifted, but I think, and I

[87:20]don't know enough about his youth to know for sure, but that's, that's so clearly a

[87:25]church, uh, transition that it's, you know, it, it has to be, you know, in you, you have

[87:30]to be born with it, but that's a learned skill too, from listening to that and growing up

[87:34]in that tradition.

[87:34]Oh, 100%.

[87:37]Uh, sorry, Aaron.

[87:38]I wasn't listening.

[87:39]I was transferring this song clip to the main page.

[87:41]I was trying to help you out.

[87:42]I was trying to help you out.

[87:43]I was trying to help you out.

[87:43]Matt, I'm telling, I told you earlier, you need that broccoli with, what is it?

[87:49]Cheese!

[87:50]Cheese!

[87:51]Cheese!

[87:52]Cheese!

[87:52]I like how we're going to get an email next week.

[87:58]Uh, Back to the Better is actually the worst piece of media I've consumed at all.

[88:01]I regret all of my decisions that led me to Back to the Better.

[88:06]What you said.

[88:07]Please stop emailing me pictures of little tiny whiskey bottles.

[88:12]I don't want that anymore.

[88:13]I can't believe I gave it to you.

[88:14]You're all dumber for having us.

[88:15]You guys know what my favorite kind of buffet is?

[88:20]What's that?

[88:21]Chinese.

[88:22]Chinese.

[88:23]Chinese.

[88:24]Now, sometimes you wonder, like, is this episode any good?

[88:32]Is this a Stone Cold classic?

[88:33]And then sometimes you just know.

[88:35]Guys, we are into the readings.

[88:39]Hey, sometimes with you, Rob, I disagree, disagree, disagree.

[88:43]Oh, my God.

[88:48]It's so good.

[88:48]Don't go.

[88:50]Don't go up to the third level and buy the tickets up there.

[88:54]It's too high.

[88:54]Aaron, what was your favorite type of exercise you used to do all the time?

[88:57]Wasn't there a king of them?

[88:58]Burp.

[89:01]Burpees!

[89:03]Burpees!

[89:04]Burpees!

[89:05]Burpees!

[89:05]That is a lot.

[89:07]There's a lot of people listening that are going to get that joke when you talk about

[89:10]Aaron doing burpees on YouTube.

[89:13]Actually, that was the whole story.

[89:16]I just told the whole story.

[89:17]Hey, you know what?

[89:18]I also heard.

[89:19]I also heard.

[89:19]Can I interrupt, Matt?

[89:20]I also heard that one of us has a new podcast about referees.

[89:24]Referees.

[89:25]Referees.

[89:26]When Sonny and Bono were going skiing, what was Sonny yelling at Bono?

[89:35]Watch out for the...

[89:36]Trees.

[89:36]Trees.

[89:37]Trees.

[89:38]Trees.

[89:38]Shut this shit down.

[89:43]Well, I guess we might as well move on to the rating system.

[89:49]Listen, I'm going to...

[89:50]Is it time for the rating system?

[89:51]Listen, the episode's going long.

[89:53]The episode's going long, so I'm just going to rush through this real quick, okay?

[89:57]Is this album at 65?

[90:00]Is this a rolling well tone?

[90:02]That means they're rolling sat down.

[90:03]They crunched the numbers.

[90:04]They're putting it into the Excel sheets.

[90:05]They're looking at ticket prices.

[90:06]How much are we willing?

[90:07]Where should we put this?

[90:08]Should we go higher or lower?

[90:09]Should we go...

[90:09]Where should we go?

[90:10]Where should we sit?

[90:10]Okay, I think anywhere we sit, it's going to be fine.

[90:12]It's not going to be high or low.

[90:13]It's not a big deal.

[90:13]Did they do a good job?

[90:15]Okay, you could hear the music.

[90:16]You could hear all the songs.

[90:17]You definitely know whether or not they played Beasts of Burden.

[90:19]That would be a rolling well toned, okay?

[90:22]If you go sit somewhere at a concert and pay a ton of money and can't hear it,

[90:26]that's kind of like this album not being as good as you think.

[90:28]That is a rolling groan.

[90:30]Or if this album is...

[90:34]Or if you think this album should have been way higher on the list, okay?

[90:38]You think maybe it should be 7, 8, 9, 10,

[90:43]10, 11, 12, 16.

[90:45]Well, I was going to say 16, I agree with you totally.

[90:47]35.

[90:48]That would be a rolling groan.

[90:49]Maybe 38.

[90:50]We should have heard this.

[90:50]Maybe we should have heard this back-to-back on Star Time.

[90:52]First we did Star Time, then we did this album.

[90:54]It's a James Brown fest.

[90:55]Everybody loves it.

[90:56]That is a rolling groan.

[90:57]So what do you think, Aaron?

[90:58]Is this album rolling well toned, rolling boned, or is it a rolling groan?

[91:02]I think this album is a blast to listen to.

[91:06]I think it's a very cool artifact of American history and rock history and

[91:12]R&B.

[91:13]And everybody should listen to it.

[91:15]I think it's nice and short.

[91:18]I think you could potentially actually maybe disagree with you a tiny bit, Rob.

[91:24]You could disagree with the sound quality.

[91:26]I think those moments where James Brown walks away from the mic, I think they're

[91:29]charming, but they're not perfect.

[91:31]Anyway, I think it's a great album.

[91:33]It's a great example of what was going on at the time.

[91:35]I think it was one of the tightest bands ever put to record.

[91:38]So I'm going to have to call it a rolling boned.

[91:41]I think it should have been higher, especially higher than

[91:43]Star Time.

[91:43]Love it.

[91:44]Russell, what do you think?

[91:45]Rolling well toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan?

[91:48]I was initially torn a little bit.

[91:53]I kind of come from the school of this feels like a greatest hits to me.

[91:56]And I feel like it's hard to put a greatest hits, a live album up against

[92:00]other albums.

[92:01]It's just they're two completely different things from my perspective.

[92:04]But I listened to this for the first time after a recording last week.

[92:08]And I sent you guys three texts at 135 in the morning.

[92:10]Here are my texts.

[92:13]I said, seriously, you're backs.

[92:14]Russell had faced down more pictures than a lot of people do in the autumn

[92:18]classic.

[92:19]My ear or my text.

[92:21]Seriously, get through the first few songs and tell me this isn't top 10.

[92:25]Text one.

[92:25]Second one.

[92:26]This crushes everything we've listened to.

[92:28]Text three.

[92:30]The short bridges on this album destroy.

[92:32]So for me, even though I'm really torn about this being a greatest hits album,

[92:36]I also think it's rolling boned.

[92:40]It should be higher on the list.

[92:42]Absolutely.

[92:42]Absolutely.

[92:43]Matt rolling, well-toned rolling bone or rolling and grown.

[92:45]What do you think?

[92:46]I think it's, you know, for all the reasons you guys have brought up, it's a great album.

[92:51]You know, they didn't, when they were making albums back per se, back when James Brown was

[92:56]at the height of his popularity, you know, his live shows are what made him popular.

[93:03]I absolutely wish I could just be at a live James Brown show as opposed to listening to

[93:08]this album.

[93:08]You know, it's not my cup of tea, as I've said a number of times, but I think it's probably

[93:13]pretty darn good right where it's at.

[93:15]So I'm going to say it's rolling well-toned.

[93:17]Is that what I, is that what I'm supposed to say?

[93:19]So, I mean, it should be right there.

[93:21]Absolutely.

[93:21]Yeah.

[93:21]Rolling well-toned.

[93:22]Well, unfortunately you are all incorrect because this is the rolling hardest working

[93:26]moan.

[93:27]Oh, damn.

[93:29]That sounded good when I heard it out.

[93:30]You can hear him guys on this, giving it absolutely a hundred the whole time.

[93:34]And he is taking the crowd for a ride.

[93:36]He is going up, down, all around.

[93:38]He is letting them, he is bringing them in and then pushing them away and they just can't

[93:42]get enough.

[93:43]And you can hear him lay the groundwork during his live stuff for the first funk songs of

[93:48]all time.

[93:48]He had about a hundred of them that were the first funk songs ever.

[93:50]You can hear that.

[93:52]He listened to all of them.

[93:52]And what's weird is that now when you listen to the songs on this album, compared to what

[93:56]you know happened with James Brown on Star Time later and later, these songs almost seem

[94:00]reserved, right?

[94:02]This almost seems like a song that is a song as we know it, not the future James Brown

[94:08]where it's just going to be repetitive over and over and over, but you can feel that energy

[94:11]that he captured with this album.

[94:12]And it's absolutely unbelievable.

[94:13]Now, listen, folks.

[94:15]Next week, let's take some love and let's add some tomatoes.

[94:21]Let's add some bacon.

[94:23]Let's add some onions.

[94:24]Hey, what do we got?

[94:25]It's a Love Supreme by John Coltrane.

[94:28]We are talking a little bit more jazz next week, to which Aaron says, yes, we can't get

[94:35]enough.

[94:36]I get to, I'm going to start Love Supreme when this show is over and not stop until I

[94:42]talk to you guys again.

[94:43]Aaron, I want to hear your three initial texts on it.

[94:46]I want to see what your three initial texts are.

[94:48]All right.

[94:49]All right.

[94:49]He just sent me one and it's a regular sized, it's a small whiskey bottle.

[94:54]His penis still looks small.

[94:56]Come on, that's unfair.

[94:58]I back did it better.

[95:00]So I know you guys know I'm always going somewhere.

[95:03]Rob, you know where I'm coming.

[95:04]I'm coming out to New York next week and you never know.

[95:07]Maybe I'll have to go hang out at Rob's house.

[95:08]But Rob, if I do shut the bathroom door and the shower is running.

[95:12]I just asked for you to please give me some privacy, privacy, privacy.

[95:17]I hope you don't think that I'm a sleaze, sleaze, sleaze.

[95:27]I'll have to get my jack off.

[95:34]Grease, grease, grease.

[95:36]I might, I might see, I might need some help or material.

[95:41]Maybe you could give me some.

[95:42]Give me your collection of your old school DVDs, DVDs, DVDs.

[95:46]Russell, do I have rhymezone.com up right now?

[95:55]You're damn right.

[95:56]God, Russell, you're the funniest fucking guy I've ever met.