Taylor Swift: Red (2012)
[00:00]In 2020, four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums as decided by Rolling Stone magazine. This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music, excoriated the order, and led us to making this podcast. We are far from experts, so we promise to do almost no research. All opinions are our own unless you disagree. Please sit back and enjoy. Beck did it better. We are all the way up to album 99. Okay? It blows my mind. And this from 2012, this is Red by Taylor Swift. Nice. I'll tell you what, guys, let's just, let's not mess around, okay? We don't have much time. We're doing a double record tonight. Matt's on a battery-only computer, so we have to go quickly. Okay? This is... Quick! Quick! We gotta go! We gotta go! Conveniently, he's like, oh, I can't do the extension cord. I don't have a cord, so I can't be on tour. He's raw-dogging this episode. By the third bad Rob joke of tonight, Matt's going to be claiming batteries running low. I can't hear you.
[01:00]What's up, what? Listen, I got a message from Beck did it better. It just says, sorry about that last episode. I remember when we made a show the first time, thinking we'll come up with better jokes. We'll be fine. Now it has been a couple years, and it seems like we made a huge mistake. Every week we hope we'll find our groove, oh yeah, but we never seem to improve. Uh-oh. But that all will change with today. I say, I guarantee that we are funny. Yes. We were a little off last time, but last time, I'm telling you, we're really do, we're really do. We guarantee tonight we'll be better. We will try to be somewhat clever. I will listen to the guys and they said that they will listen to me. Tonight you will truly, truly see Beck can
[02:00]do it better. Yes. I love it. It's not that hard to be Taylor Swift, turns out. That sounded exactly like Taylor Swift. That was crazy. Taylor Swift takes off a mask and it's me. And then I take off my mask. And my skin looks great because it was a mud mask. Did it better. Listen, we are talking about Taylor Swift's Red. Let's not mess around. Let's get right into it. I've got three guys here to help me break down a little known album by a little known artist. I've got Russell, Minnesota Russell. How are you doing? Rob, you go podcast with Matt podcast with Aaron podcast with me, but we are never, ever, ever, ever getting downloads together. Like I was going to make a song about how we're never ever going to get better. And then I realized that's what our next episode song also is about. And I was like, well, I can't do like two songs in a row. I've got Matt Minneapolis. Matt, how are you doing? Great, Rob. Again,
[03:01]new me, new Matt. We're going to bring the energy in this section here. So I'm just going to say it feels like a perfect night to dress up like some aging millennials who are talking about Taylor Swift. Yeah, let's do it. We're we're perfect for this job. Hey, Matt, man, don't you feel like you're 42? I'm 42. 42. I only feel like I'm 41 as our old. I'm trying to match the energy. I don't know if I can do it. That's too hard. I mean, that was you're fired up, but and I've got Aaron out in California. Aaron, congratulations on your new job. The head of the North Korean golf tour. So great job on that. I just want to say congratulations. I think it's a great idea. Aaron in Oaktown. How you doing? Appreciate that, Rob. Before you, I only did podcasts with self-indulgent takers. Let's talk about Taylor Swift. Well, good thing. I'm not one of those. It's not self-indulgent. If you're eating like hot dogs, that's not self-indulgent. The hot dogs aren't part of me.
[04:01]Okay. Self-indulgent hot dogs. Oh, that sounds so good. Listen, no more messing around. Okay. Matt's computer is going to die at any second. We've got to get to the voice. 92%. We simply don't have enough time. We were on a clock. We can edit that out, though. Well, leave me alone. About our listeners, right? Hi, guys. This is Patty, Matt's mother-in-law. I'm sorry for my froggy voice. I have a question that goes way back to your inning because I didn't listen to the beginning of the podcast. Go back and let's do it. And I'm wondering about Beck. I know who he is, but I don't know why you guys are obsessed with him or who is obsessed with him or who started wanting to talk about Beck. That's my question. I also want to say that we're really proud of Matt because he ran Grandmas and finished yesterday.
[05:02]All of us who love him are proud of him. We're proud of him, too. Bye-bye. That's super sweet. You know what, Patty? We're also all doing stuff, okay? We're all doing stuff, so actually do your research. Maybe go back and listen to some episodes and you'll figure out why, but I can't be too hard on Patty. I drove a marathon today if you count it both ways. I got my gas at a marathon gas station. I think that counts. It's not a big deal. So, Russ, why are we called Beck Did It Better again? I think it's good to hit the refresh every once in a while. You know what? I would tell people to go back and listen to episode zero because we talked about where the name came from and why we called the podcast Beck Did It Better, but it turns out that all of the podcast sites only take 100 episodes now, so every time we do an episode, one of our earlier episodes drops off, so nobody can ever go out and listen to episode zero and find out, so we'll have to tell them real quick, but my recollection is we started listening to the top 500 list. You started it.
[06:01]Give yourself credit. You're the one who said, I'm going to listen to all 500 albums. I want to start listening to all 500 albums. I'm not a huge music fan or anything. I thought it would be a fun quest, and I got a handful of albums in, and I texted a large group text message, and I said, you know what? A lot of these albums are great and was listening to a Beatles album, and I said, this is a great album and everything, but I think when it comes to really strange songs, Beck does it better than the Beatles, and everyone just lost their shit. They called me an idiot saying Beck's better than the Beatles, and that's not what I meant. What I meant is he does certain things better than other great artists, so we thought that would be a cool way to approach the podcast. Is that about right? I think that, yeah, that's it, right? And so we knew nothing about Beck. Russ is not, you were not a huge Beck fan, right? I've probably got one of his CDs and have listened to another one on a car ride. So we just randomly said, oh, Beck has, we bet Beck would do these songs better, and it turns out Beck has made one bazillion songs that fits almost every album on this list.
[07:02]He's got a lot of good ones, doesn't he? We are so lucky we picked Beck as an artist. I was going to ask, because Matt, you said you were going to start listening to new artists, because you're through all 500 albums now. Have you, you mentioned you might start listening to Beck's catalog. Have you started doing that yet or not? Yeah, I'm like, oh, I listened to it three or four times, and then I created a playlist of his top, I think it was one of those things where I went in and I just, if I liked a song, I just added it to a playlist on Amazon Music. That's what I use. And so I got, there's 27 songs out of like the 11 or 12 albums that he's got. And I could share it with our, I should put it out on Insta or something. Yeah, I do it, Matt. I think, Matt, it's on Spotify under Beck's Greatest Songs. Is it? Somebody already did the list? Well, actually, Matt, I haven't done it by the time this thing publishes. Oh, gotcha. Okay. All this discussion of CDs and playlists and streaming media and ephemeral podcasts reminds me, listeners.
[08:02]What does ephemeral mean? This stuff doesn't last forever. I'm an ephemeralist. You're at the whim of your streaming partners. These things don't last forever. Get your cassette recorder out. Record this on cassette. You need to get physical copies of Beck Did It Better. This stuff isn't going to last forever, people. You all need to make sure that you're recording, saving these things, just like you used to record off the radio. That's true. The top five at nine. You can't miss this. So, listeners, like Russell said, that first episode's going away every time. If you can't get physical copies, you can at least get physical with your host. Yes, that's the other thing. Maybe this is our last night for episode three. Russell keeps saying that every time we end an episode. I'm like, okay, we'll see you guys later. He's like, well, we can get physical. I'm like, oh, click. Everybody knows Odelay by Beck. I think, well, not everybody. Okay. So, Odelay by Beck. K.O. Nguero.
[09:00]Just Nguero. But K.O. Nguero, that would be my walk-up song, if I could choose one. Brian from Woodbury. Has always asked, what's your walk-up song? He comes up with some good stuff. But K.O. Nguero by Beck would be my walk-up. It's just a bang. And then, Wow by Beck. It's another song to listen to. So, just throwing out a couple of nuggets for some of those Becker heads out there who haven't listened to much of Beck. Here's my walk-up song. Matt, when it comes to walk-up songs, then, who does it better? Oh, Beck. Absolutely. Absolutely does it better. Yep. Beck did it better. I'm not sure what we were talking about there, but I think that's... Listen, I think the idea that we're all thinking of walk-up songs is so funny. The idea that at some point, it's like, hey, listen, you're in this game. And we're like, oh, shit. And you need to think of a walk-up song. It's like, oh, thank goodness. At some point, yeah, I'm 41 years old. At some point in the future, I'm going to be in a spot where some little intern's going to walk up and say, hey, you're up six tonight. What are you going to have for your walk-up? Because we've got to get the list together. That's going to happen. And it's definitely not a reoccurring dream that I have where I am
[10:01]back in college playing football and they need me for the second half. And I'm getting ready to go and I'm excited to play football again and I can't find a pad. And then I find that pad and I'm missing a shoe. And then I can't find my mouth guard and the game's starting. And I'm sure that's normal stuff like that. There's nothing. I don't need to look into that. I don't need to talk to my therapist about that. The hallway that you take is taking extra long to get there and then you don't get to the field. Yeah, no, I hear you. Yeah, and then my kids come out and say, oh, you're not spending enough time with us. And I'm like, wait, what does that mean? I'm like, ah, no time. I got to get to this podcast. I got to end the podcast. Kids, shut up. I mean, mine always is Sexual Healing by Marva Gay. Unless it's like a special night, then it's the cover of Sexual Healing by the Hot 8 Brass Band. Can't you see Aaron in the on-deck circle when his song hits and he's just rubbing that pine tar up and down his bat? Rob, if the Beckerheads want to call in and give us their walk-up song and see if it can be becked at it better, how do they get a hold of the beck line? 802-277-BECK. Call or text. We all know my walk-up song, by the way.
[11:02]So, I mean, you hear this coming, I'm walking up. And you're like, wow. That's one hot teacher. Because I teach you guys, I'm a teacher to you guys, right? I teach you guys about life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness. And we all think you're super hot. It's like what we talk about when you hang up after the podcast. You know, if you're hiding in a bathroom, you got to hold your breath so they don't hear you. You know, stuff like that. We talk, and I think that's something we edited out of the last episode. But we're always learning. That's our key. We're lifelong learners on this podcast. Rob, my favorite thing when you used to play softball, you would come up with that walk-up song. You would always get in a hot box for teaching. Now you're talking. Now you're sharks. I've got something I want to talk to you about. What was your guy's style? Did you guys play hot box when you were a kid where you'd throw the ball back and forth and everyone would run and you'd try to run from a base? Were you one who would stand on the base the whole time? Or were you one who would like run out and stand in the middle and kind of try to taunt them to
[12:00]come get you? What was your style? Russell, I'm not going to lie. When you said hot box, I thought you meant smoking weed in an enclosed area. Russell's really bringing it out of this episode. That's interesting. We called it pickle. We didn't call it hot box. And yeah, I was always the daring pickle guy. Like, I like to get out there and see what I could make happen. Yeah, and that's why you have that nickname now. That's why your Zoom name on the Zoom says daring pickle guy. I grew up in a neighborhood where I was by far the oldest child. And so I, again, was a god at every school. Baseball, crushing it. Fastest one in the neighborhood. Because I was like literally five years older than everybody else. Blocking shots like crazy on our basketball hoop that only went up to eight feet. So I was convinced my whole life that I could just dunk on a basketball hoop like how awesome I was. Turns out when you get out to actual basketball and people start dribbling with their left hands, you're absolutely screwed. It's, when I saw somebody dribble with their left hand for the first time, I was like what the fuck? How can you even do that? Like, I can barely dribble with my right hand. Rolling, going. Rosie, how's it going with you?
[13:01]It's going pretty well. It's been a good day, although it's warm again. And I'm now, as we've discussed, I'm now podcasting from the kitchen and it's 82 in the house and I'm realizing that maybe tonight was not the best night to make halibut for dinner. So, it's pretty Milk was a poor choice. It's going to be a long night here in this smelly fish kitchen, but I'm happy to be here with you guys. It smells like my bed when I wake up. You stick your head under the covers. That's what it smells like. It's just like you've been hot boxing a halibut down there. On the scale of white fish, where does halibut fall for you, Rosie? It falls Alaskan halibut is at the top, I would say. California halibut is my favorite eaten raw, but the kid doesn't do rough. Yeah, California halibut at Sashimi is like perfect. There used to be this place called Just for the Halibut and it was on 60th and Portland.
[14:03]The Richfield Halibut. It's one of the best places for halibut, right? It was awesome. I don't think there's anything better than halibut. Just a good chunk of halibut. That's just good fish, Rosie. Yeah, you're right. That's the Alaska stuff. That's the real fatty stuff. The California stuff's a little leaner, so you got to be careful how you cook it, but you're right, Matt. Did they do it fried or grilled or what? You got to choose. They fried that up. Like fish and chips, halibut? They come out and you have milk or water or whatever in the old glass jar, the ball jars. That's amazing. Is this Little House on the Prairie? What are you talking about? Does this place still exist? No. A jar of milk with halibut? It's not like an architecture building or something. It's a restaurant that's only serving white food. It's like, oh, you can have a side of ranch. What else could you have? You could have uncooked potatoes. Tartar sauce. What's some other delicious white food? Whipped cream. Ugh. I kind of figured, Matt, I'm kind of surprised you're a fish guy, Matt. I thought
[15:01]maybe you would stray away from fish. Absolutely. Well, you know what I do every time we go to Vegas, right? With or without you. Oh, that's true. You do eat crab. Yeah, it's true. You do take a belt and, oh, wait, what? Oh, yeah, the crab legs. That's what I meant. Why does it smell like halibut in our room here? It's a hot box going in that room. Gets it nice and hot in there. Guys, I'm a big seafood guy. Well, did I tell you guys I'm on a seafood diet? I only eat food that was grown in the sea. Interesting. Yeah. Aaron is passing out in his house that smells like a fish. I'll talk halibut anytime. No, I'm glad. I'm glad to hear your thoughts. How did you cook it, then? Toaster oven, man. The fish in the toaster oven, that is the bomb. It's easy. No, come on. You're making fish in a toaster? What the hell is that? No, toaster oven. Yeah, man. You set that thing on 400. Eric Repair,
[16:01]the famous chef from Le Bernardin, Russell knows who Eric Repair is, the ripper. He has a good recipe for broiling halibut in the toaster. But I've never been able to get that one right. It never turns out right. You have to put it in the hot box. You guys didn't know we were going to pull out Russell's Eric Repair. I don't think that was a very good French impression. Maybe it was really good, Russell. It was so good. Oh, my God. His memoir is actually called 32 Yolks. It's a good read. He's a super cool guy. 32 Yolks? That's more yolks than usually show up on one of these podcasts. I mean, I'm trying to tell these yolks, but it's tough. We talk a lot about celebrity chefs. What would be your guys like? Do you think it would be cool to be a celebrity chef? Yeah, of course it'd be fucking cool to be a celebrity chef. What are you talking about? But you still have to work super late hours all the time. You've got to work till midnight every night, right? I wouldn't like that at all. Oh, no. What's my family going to do? Who cares? I'm a celebrity chef. I'm at work making delicious food. I mean, if you're a celebrity
[17:01]chef who doesn't have to actually work in a kitchen anymore, that would be cool. But yeah, if you still got to do the work, that's hard work, man. Have you seen like that Salt Bae guy? Have you seen him? Yeah, he's like an internet sensation. Where he comes out and he puts the salt on everything and you can go in his restaurant and he has like a $300 hamburger where he comes out and he does the salt thing and then he puts like gold on it. That's what I would be. I would be like an Instagram restaurant. You would be all about presentation. Oh, I'd be putting gold flecks on everything and melting cheese and I'd be, there'd be so many pictures of me in this restaurant. Gold flecks and melting cheese. That's it. Just all of it. I'd have tortilla chips. I'd throw that stuff in the microwave. It'd be melting and people would just be going nuts for it. I think these celebrity chefs, I mean, I think they're so good because they have the passion for it. I mean, that's what makes them good at what they do. So a lot of times they're still cooking. Anyways, you know, Gavin Kaysen was on K-Fan a couple mornings ago because he started opening up a new restaurant or something like that. Stable is his old one, but he's got a new one coming, right?
[18:01]Right. Down in the new building and in the hotel, Four Seasons or whatever it is. But the, but he was talking about how he just loves to make food. You know, that's his thing. He can't shoot a hockey puck and he can't shoot a basketball thing, but he can make food. And so he was with his, he was with his kid and they were in a hockey tournament down in Austin and they had like this time. And so they were going to order a bunch of pizzas and they're like, okay, we got an hour and a half before the pizzas get here. And so he just basically said, fuck this, went over to the grocery store, grabbed a bunch of stuff, made this huge charcuterie plate for everybody. And that's what you do when you're a celebrity chef is if you're on the, you know, whatever Bantam B or whatever team he's on and you've got a celebrity chef, you just instantly get the best food ever. Just imagine big Rob's house of ribs. You go in and it's just a picture of me standing there. And I've got a big thing of ribs and I'm like, damn, you're at big Rob's house of ribs. Right. And it, and you just walk in and there's pictures of me and there's gold
[19:00]flecks everywhere. And there's somehow still melted cheese everywhere. What a great restaurant. Rob, how do you think my dating, my online dating life would have gone differently if I were a celebrity chef the whole time? Oh my God. Can you imagine? Can you imagine what that would be like? It's like, oh, where are we going to go to a date? Oh, my restaurant. Oh, big Rob's house of big house, big Russ's house of ribs. Yes. We are going there. I shouldn't have just put that down. It would have been much easier. It's like the scene in chef where he makes the cacio e pepe for Scarlett Johansson. You're just like what? John Favreau and Scarlett Johansson. Yeah. Okay. I get it. Yeah. It makes sense. Yeah. Totally. Yeah. It's weird that a movie made by John Favreau would have him being with Scarlett Johansson. That's so weird. Aaron, can we not go one episode? Where you don't bring up that God dang frittata that you keep talking about in every episode of the podcast? The one from Big Night where I think about that anytime I make eggs. I'm always thinking about trying to be Stanley Tucci. Every time if I get in the kitchen, I'm making eggs. I'm trying to channel Stanley Tucci in Big Night every time. I know that being a chef would suck. I know the hours would suck.
[20:00]I just think it would be so great just to be like, hey, guess, look at this. I made this huge burger and everybody's like, wow, it's really good. And you're like, yeah, great. I mean, like I don't do I don't do anything in my life ever where people go, wow, that was really good. Thank you so much. Like I don't create anything. I don't make anything. Rob's idea of being a celebrity chef is melting cheese, baking ribs and making a big burger. Yeah. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm not putting halibut in a fucking microwave or whatever you're doing. Yeah, the halibut goes in the toaster oven. Anyway, for everyone out there who's trying to figure out how to cook your halibut in a toaster oven, I have found that roasting it on 400 on some parchment. We just got negative five emails to the account. I don't know how that's possible. It doesn't make sense is the best way to do it. And I got some good lemon pepper from the Oaktown Spice Shop. Shout out the Oaktown Spice Shop. That guy is probably not listening to the podcast yet. But yeah, it's delicious. Very good. Very good dinner. But now I'm smelling it. Reliving it. What is that? The Oaktown Spice Shop. This place is just a whole shop
[21:00]of spices. It's incredible. Can you like open them up and smell them? No, you can't do that. Yeah, sure. Yeah, because you can either buy a glass jar or they sell plastic bags that are the exact size of the glass jar for refilling your glass jar. I would not put plastic bags on my food. That's one guarantee you can get at Big Rob's House of Ribs. Not many plastic bags on your food. And it's like it's all organized by category. It's beautiful. It's a wonderful place. It's locally owned. Yeah, Matt. Is this guy is this guy? I can just picture a guy who opens a spice shop, right? Yeah. Is this guy is pissed when marijuana got legalized in California? On the back of his shop, he was that's where he was making all of his money. Actually, one of the spices I bought is called Grand Lake Shake. And so it's called Grand Lake Shake. You buy it in a little baggie, but it's actually great for it kind of smells like chicken soup, but it's great for you can mix it in Greek yogurt and make a veggie dip. I'll do this all night. If you guys don't want to talk about music, I'll talk about fucking veggie dip and spices. If
[22:01]you want to go a little bit. Yeah, nobody said nobody said yes to that. So here's the thing is that I think if I had a spice shop in my town growing up, I would have called and said, hey, seriously, can you unscramble this channel? Like I just for like five, ten minutes, just unscramble it. I can see a little an areola. There's that guy's shoe. I can't tell, but every three seconds it comes into view. Yeah, definitely didn't mess me up like in a weird way where it's that's good. That's a good one. Thank you. Thank you. I don't think we're Rob. Where do you think it went wrong? Ah, it was that fuzzy channel that in 49 or whatever was I could never come to. Yeah, when I asked my wife to dress up in a blurry sweater, she's like, why do you like this so much? I'm like, just do it back to my youth. Yeah, I love it. Matt rolling going. How's it going with you? So we made the trek up to middle of nowhere, North Dakota today. So
[23:01]yeah, 500 miles, 700 or seven hours. I drove the whole way. Oh, well, yeah, of course. Wow. Look at Aaron. Aaron's mind is blown. He's like, that's so far to drive. You drove? Somehow I talked to my wife and my kids. We only stopped once. Wow. That is a three star. That's my that is my win for the day is that we only made one stop. We made it 710 instead of doing two or three stops and making it like 745. So you know what, man? I'm with you. When I road trip, I'm all about no stops. You just drive through and you keep it going. There's no reason to add like an extra 20 minutes for some random gas station if you don't need to. Dad, I'm thirsty. Can I have some water? Absolutely not. No, you absolutely cannot. Forget about it. Well, to Sarah's credit, I mean, she she packs lunches and snacks and everything. I mean, like we're well equipped for the kids when they start asking for stuff like this. They've got so much
[24:01]I think I was so much halibut in the car. It's crazy. Yeah, I think I was saying, Rob, I don't know how much you know about tons. I'm not a driver anymore, but I was saved three times, three times a day by the Waze app. Yeah. Telling me there's cops ahead. It's the best. And so I don't know who came up with the Waze app, but man, are they geniuses and good stuff. It's so good. I mean, even just saying like, oh, there's something on the side of the road. So look out like it's just I love the Waze app. What rank are you in the Waze app? Do you have? Oh, I have no idea. I'm kind of a newbie, so I have no way of telling. Okay, well, maybe I shouldn't be talking to you about this then. I don't want to talk. I have I actually have the sword. I'm the highest rank in the Waze, even though I don't even own a car. Where do you find your rank? Let me see if I can look it up, but my way. You don't even know. Never mind. Who are the people that are driving and then like clicking on their phone and alerting people to the cops? Like, is there like a button that you say police? It's easy to like alert people or how does it work? Or like car on the side of the road or hazard or just, you know, construction zone or something. You feel so smart that when you're alerted to a cop and you can slow down and not get caught and you're like, I'm
[25:01]invincible. I could be driving 200 miles an hour. Who cares? Seven. I got 7,898 points. I'm guessing that's not a lot, whatever that means, but I got no rank, so I must be I gotta get it out my game. Come on up the game. We get it. Seven hour drives. You got to start getting some ranks on that stuff. So yeah, thank God for ways. I agree. It's great. So what are you? So what are you doing now up in North Dakota? Like, what is your day going to look like tomorrow? Like, are you sitting there? Do you have to take the kids out on the boat? Can you just avoid the family? By the way, things are going fine over here. Just in case anybody's wondering, I've mentioned avoiding my family multiple times. 82%. Just letting you know. Yes. So we give you updates throughout this. Yes, I love it. We will. So we got up here. We haven't been up here in like four weeks. So there's a lot of just opening stuff up. But tomorrow, yes, we'll be on the boat. Sarah's got a cousin on the lake who's got a big ass boat. One of those big wave boats. Forget what it's called, but where you can surf behind it that everyone else hates on the lake. Yeah, but there's about
[26:00]eight of them around here. So this lake is going to be aft in about two years. Everybody's like, why is our shoreline destroyed? Why do we have no more shoreline? Also, check out this boat I have that makes giant waves. Oh, I can't see any correlation between them. No, nothing like that. So no, we'll get out. I mean, there's golf cart rides boy trying to I don't know how you say it. You think you do this with your girls a little bit to decity fi. Yeah, you know, get the get them just to be able to run around in the country a little bit without, you know, like they can go anywhere around here and there's not a threat of anything and stuff like that. So just to get them to be a little bit more free, I guess stuff like that. So a lot of exploring, a lot of boat time, a lot of just sitting around doing nothing. Yeah, you know what I do is I get him a nice iPad. Game about going outside. So then they can really experience what going outside is. They love VR goggles. Yeah, you can find new. You can find North Dakotan Pokemon. Get out there. That's I just got to find those things that are dumb as hell. I should tell you guys since we started talking about throwing a baseball with your kid one time, I've been
[27:00]out throwing a baseball with my girl almost every day now, like back and forth. It's great. She has only got hit in the face once, which is not great. But other than that, we're just out there chatting. And I once again, I say that the podcast has made me a better dad. So I appreciate it. Yeah, very nice. Russell says you're welcome. Russell rolling going. How's it going with you? Rolling going. Things are going well. We had talked about live music a few weeks back and you guys had talked about the Turf Club that the Turf Club was one of your favorite concert venues. Is that right? Yeah. And again, live music. I just think it's so great. It's like the lightning crashes and a new cry. That joke will forever be funny to me to the floor. You know what? I was going to night. I was going to do a top five list about my favorite placenta songs. And that one was not on it. Yeah, it's not didn't make the cut. Yeah, there was one back. Did it better song about the placenta that was on the list that bumped it out? So it technically probably could have made it. But well, I told you guys know my famous
[28:01]placenta story. I've told you yesterday, right? Where I don't know. We Jenny and I have a baby. Okay. And kind of equal work. You know, we just did it. We should our part. And this baby comes out. And so we have, you know, my sister. Want first baby in the family. My sisters want a picture. So I take a picture of the placenta, which I remember being in a coffee can, but that can't be right. They can't keep the placenta in a coffee can. So I take a picture of the placenta and then send that to my sisters. So funny. It made me laugh so hard because they're like, oh God. And I did it for the second kid to not as funny when my younger sister had her kid. And then I said, oh, please send a picture. And there's a picture of the placenta. And I was like, actually, this is really wrong. So normal stuff going on in the Rob family. Don't worry about it. I don't remember where the placenta went. In that moment. That's that's wild. Oh, you see the spice store guy. Oh, good. Oh, no. So I actually went there a few weeks ago. A few weeks ago, it was Paul McCartney's 80th birthday. And so to celebrate that, they did a
[29:00]celebration of Paul McCartney, where they essentially you bought tickets to this. You go to the turf club. It's kind of like a dive bar type place. I would say they've got seats at the bar. They got tables and everything. Where are the lights on? I don't know what that means. What do you mean with the lights on? It's all been in the dark. Everything's in the dark. I just want to know what is going on in this day. Everybody can see everybody. This is crazy. The lights were on. Russell's date is like, I liked it better when we were in the dark. No reason. Don't ask why. Well, I don't need it. It doesn't need to be repeated to me. It was good. Yeah, I mean, I heard that enough from a downloader that night, but whatever. So Paul McCartney, they had this backing band and they had about eight or nine different singers that came up and sang two or three Paul McCartney songs. And it was just a great time. Some of my favorite songs that they played, Let It Be, Back in the USSR, Oh Darling, and the three songs they ended on. I want to see what you guys think
[30:00]of these as a closing part of the concert for Paul McCartney. They had Paperback Writer, which I was surprised about, but it actually crushed. That works. That's a good song. Great song. And it has a great bass line, too. It's got a great Paul bass line, so that makes sense. Not quite as good as Tax Man, but it's a good song. They did not play Tax Man. It's because it's a George Harrison song. Oh, well. The second encore was one of Matt's favorites. Helter Skelter was the second encore. That is cool. That's super cool. And then the closing finale was Obla Di Obla Don. They had to go with that one as the closer. That's a good crowd pleaser. Everybody can sing it and go out on it. And I think that's one of the perfect Paul McCartney songs now. Because, you know, like John Lennon said, that's granny music. And then you look at Paul McCartney, and he looks like a granny. So this is perfect. It's the perfect combination. Did they have a piano on stage for Obla Di Obla Don? They had a keyboard. I don't know if it was a Amand, a Lowry.
[31:02]I don't know which kind of keyboard it was, but they did have a keyboard. And the keyboard actually crushed on a few songs. It was really good. That's awesome. Russell went up to the musician and said, listen, I'm really interested in your organ. And the musician's like, that's great. Actually, can I meet you out back in what we call the... The halibut zone. Our set's done at 11. We'll come find you later. Have you ever been to the spice shop? I want to show you something that's a little blurry. I've got a special white sauce for your fish here. Oh, no. What? Alright, but you know what I wanted to share with you guys? I don't know if I shared this, but I have a hot take. A hot take of Paul McCartney songs that came from this. Okay. I have a belief that the greatest Paul McCartney song ever is not a Beatles' song. Okay. I believe it is Band on the Run. Band on the Run is an amazing Paul McCartney song, Rob. I gave you a bit of it, but like, there's kind of three songs in one. Yeah, I was going to say, it's three or four songs in one song. Yeah. Here's the
[32:00]right there at that moment when it converts to that groove. A little bit of reggae kind of. I think this is the greatest Paul McCartney song ever. Hot take. Your thoughts. I'm not going to disagree with you. I love listening to this song. This is a great song. You guys are idiots. I would love to have a fight with you. Me too, but like, I mean, listen to that. Well, I mean. Who's ever sat down and said, you know what I really want to listen to is Band on the Run. The only Paul McCartney song I might put above this one is Wonderful Christmas Time. I might put Wonderful Christmas Time above this one. But otherwise, I'm going to agree with you, Russell. This was my favorite song of the night. I was so, I know they played it and it crushed because we were talking about how it's multiple songs in one and when it kind of converts to the next song every time, it's like, oh yeah, oh yeah, go get it. And it's just badass. It's a great song. When those strings come in, when those you know, and then it goes
[33:00]to the next part, that's a great transition. I cannot disagree more. I dare any Beckerhead to call in and claim that they've got a better Paul McCartney song than that because when you do, we will edit that shit out. But I wanted to share a few of my experiences at the at the turf club, if I could, other than music. And the first one was, we got to get back to the singer on stage. Remember how I talked when I was in Nashville, when the lead singer leaves the stage during a concert. I understand now why because when a lead singer stands up on the stage and isn't singing and doesn't have an instrument, they got nothing to do and they stand there and it is the most awkward thing ever. And there were two, there was one lead singer who stood up there during the bass player song where they came, the bass player came and sang and it was a disaster. So now I'm starting to get what you guys were saying, why they had to go with the ladies in Nashville. They're just give it, they're giving the musicians, they're giving them the stage, right? I mean, rightfully so for a lot
[34:01]of the times, you know, they need to be in the forefront. Russ thinks if you're the singer, you got to go up back to the halibut hotbox back in the back and meet somebody for the Spice Channel. You can't, you don't keep looking at that dude's organ. I do love the idea though of Russ at a concert watching the music. I mean, I don't know if it's a good idea, but I do love the idea of Russ at a concert watching the music. And listening to music and everybody else is having a great time. And Russell's thought is like, oh, the lead singer's up there. This is really stressful. This is really stressing me out. And he's like, what are you talking about? It's not a thought. It's like my phone is out and it's going in the notepad. It's not a thought. It's written down. I'm probably the only one taking notes on concerts. I got to be the only one in the turf club taking notes. He's at the dark Paul McCartney tribute. And all you see is a bright light that says lead singer awkwardly standing there. He's doing a voice text to it. This lead singer's acting weird. Lead singer. He's got that one emoji that's like, oh, yeah, exactly. The other thing I was going to ask, and I think maybe Aaron can respond to this because Aaron's a bar sitter. When you go to a concert and it's at a bar, if you can find the perfect spot at the bar
[35:01]where you're at, like the corner where you and your downloader can turn and both see it be at the bar and get drinks whenever you need them. Is there anything better than being at a concert when you can get a drink whenever you want with no line and sitting down? Yeah, no. No. And then the only the only problem with that bar is if it's crowded enough. I mean, everybody is walking by you, you know, and there's constantly in the brushing and all that. That's the only the traffic going by you at that bar is the only issue. Otherwise, you are absolutely right. Sitting there and they got us a huge bar to write and it's a great long huge big taps, all that stuff. So it's great that you are correct. Russell, did you get seat at the bar? I sit at the corner of the bar. It was a great seat. But if you go with a friend to the bar to watch the concert, another McCartney fan, how would you describe this friend? Yeah, I'm a fan. Is there anything? There's nothing else. No other descriptors. Someone
[36:01]who had a great idea to go see a Paul McCartney concert. So I ran to the bathroom and I came back and this McCartney fan was looking at because they had been sitting in a different seat kind of closer a little bit closer on the other side of the corner of the bar. I came back from the bathroom and they were not looking very happy at that point and they said it's because people were started kind of filtering in Matt and they could no longer see. Yeah. And so because the McCartney fan wasn't as tall as I am because I'm a very tall man. Yeah, we know that. And so that this McCartney fan that I was with insisted that we move to the middle of the bar and immediately was like oh no. Yeah, we have the we have the best spot ever and now we have to move because now you're rubbing ointment on your neck because you're getting to the side every day. Let me guess. Let me guess because this sounds like somebody that I know where you can see perfectly. They can't see that great. So you have to move where now you're behind a million people can't see anything but they can see because now they can be right up against the
[37:01]fence or whatever. And so for them it's good and for you it's actually a huge waste of two hours. But if you say anything you sound like an absolute psychopath. So you have to just sit there and stew. We actually had great seats. It was a great time at the concert. With the McCartney fan. Yeah, I loved I love seeing through somebody's elbow armpit into where I could just see one of the guitar players. That was my favorite part and I just watched that one guitar and get out of here. It's that that load-bearing pillar that was in my face the whole time in the second half of the concert was great. Yeah, and that's that's another nickname for the halibut hotbox out back is load-bearing pillar load-bearing pillar. The last thing I was going to ask you about this. This is more of a bar thing and it might be Aaron again. Aaron's the bar guy. He's always he's always trying out new drinks or whatever. I'm pretty sure you're the bar guy. Now Russell I Aaron once the last time you've been inside of a bar. That's true. I went inside on Father's Day to order after I went paddleboarding. We talked about that, but but yeah, I'm not I've not been sitting inside bars for a long time. Russell's definitely far more
[38:01]up-to-date on bars than I am right now. I got a question for you and I want to make clear. This does not relate to the McCartney fan that I was with. This does not relate to the McCartney fan in any way. What are your thoughts about people who ask for samples of beer? They go up and they can't decide what to get and they need I need a sample of this one. I need a sample of this one. I need a sample of this one. Your thoughts. I am sympathetic. Okay, I don't I don't it's kind of a weird move, but I am sympathetic because I especially if you're going to go and get one of these like fancy you know hoppy juicy IPA, you know something that you like like I can narrow down where what kind of beer I want, right? But if I'm going to spend the time and I'm going to have one or two of those, you know, like I just want it to be the beer that I want and sometimes I just don't know. I'm not that smart about beers. And so like Sarah of all people knows exactly what I want every time she can just look at a 40 beers on a list and I say Sarah, what do I want? She gets
[39:00]it, you know, but I always pick the wrong one. I'm always like one or two off of what I should be getting. So I wish but I but then I'm not the one who I don't I don't have the balls to ask. Can I can I sample that please because I know where you're going here. Like it's kind of a weird it's kind of a weird move, but I am sympathetic and I wish I could I wish I would do that so that I would just enjoy that pint that I got instead of sometimes it's just like, ah, this is not what I wanted, but I'll gut it and try another one. Sometimes the coolest thing is actually having your wife do a lot of work for you. That's actually a lot of really cool thing that is. I mean, right. This all sounds fantastic. Yeah, I'm not at all against sampling beers. I think if the bartender, you know, if it's if it's not if it's if it's getting busy and you're asking for five samples, okay, maybe that's not great. If it's not busy and the bartender is willing to indulge, I think that's great. I personally for me, a sample size beer is 16 ounces. I don't actually know. Yeah, I don't actually know if I like a beer until I've had a whole beer. So for me, like if I order a sample, I feel pressure to like, do I like
[40:01]did I like that when I just tasted it? I don't know. Like I don't actually know if I like a beer until I've sat with the whole thing. So for me, buying a beer always a sunk cost. If I didn't like it by the time I get to the bottom, then, you know, lesson learned. I go to the next one. Russell, I'm in rage when somebody asks for samples at an ice cream parlor. I think samples have no place in society. I'm like, just fucking order it and deal with it. It's a gamble. Like, that's the fun part. Oh, I'm going to taste what the lemon sherbet. What do you think the lemon sherbet tastes like? Huh? Oh, you're going to try like, and they'll try like chocolate. And I'm like, what the fuck do you think it tastes like? Get the fuck out of here with these sample shit. So you can, at ice cream shops, you can see it. Like, if I could see what the beer looked like, I would know what beer it was. Like, Rosie, I know exactly within it. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. I know I know within two or three. That's stimulated visually. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a visual guy. I'm a visual guy. Don't say it like that. That's why you ask if the lights are on or not. That's why I get it with ice cream. Like, you can see what it is. You can see what the ice cream is. Like, the beer, like, sometimes I'm like, oh, it comes out. The bartender
[41:01]is handing it to you or the waitress is bringing it to you or waiter, you know, whoever. Like, god dang, that's not going to be what I want, you know, kind of a thing. And so, no. Well, that's because beer names are like, beer names are all fucked up now, too. Like, the name doesn't tell you what it is. That's part of the problem. Well, you know, I'm I have some beer stress because my Roland Ghosn coming out here and I'll talk about later, but I'm going to Ireland in a couple days and I know, you guys know, I don't drink beer at all, but we are going, I am a science guy, so I love talking about fermentation and going to breweries. So, we are going to the Guinness. Oh, nice. Have to do it. Yeah, have to do it. We get two free glasses of Guinness and she's like, what are we going to do? We'll just have to ask for soda. And I said, absolutely not. I will not do that. You and I are going to drink two Guinnesses each and that's just the way it is and we're going to deal with it. We're going to do it. We're going to be grownups. It's like, it's like our kids. It's like, yo, you're going to finish those Guinnesses. Okay, you don't get any. You can have one. Rob, you can have one. It's okay to have one. Guess what? I'm going to have two, man. I'll show you. I know. Do you think you get to see the two fat guys on the bicycle
[42:01]and the lady with the super long fingernails at that brewery? That's the funniest fucking joke you've ever told. If you go to the Guinness factory and it's the fat guys on the motorcycle. Oh my God. I was looking for the world's best guys. It's Waldo. It's Robert Waldo, the tallest man. I was looking for that lady with the super long hair. What the fuck? Meanwhile, I have to drink this thick beer the whole day. What the fuck? Lady's been hula hooping for 18 years. Where's that guy from the podcast who plays the piano solo for 25 straight hours? What the fuck? It warms my heart when the girls bring home the Guinness Book of World Records still from the book fair. I'm like, yep, it's still going. It's still great. What would be the best? That has to be your present when you go to Ireland. You got to bring back the Guinness Book of World Records, right? Are you going to Ireland without your kids? Yeah, of course. So who watches your kids when you're in Ireland? That's amazing.
[43:01]They're kids. It's fine. What are they going to do? They're not driving a car. They're fine. No, they're actually going on a road trip from New York to Minnesota with the in-laws. Rolling going for you, Rob. What else is going for you other than your trip? For me, my rolling going is I'm going out to Ireland and Jenny has informed me that number one, to Aaron's shock, I will be driving out there because it's too big to kind of walk and there's not the great public transportation. So we actually have to get a car. She informed me that the only car she could get is a stick. And I asked the question. Now, first of all, I can drive a stick. Okay. I'm like fucking, I'm like fucking Paul Newman out there. I'm drinking so much ranch dressing. But the stick, I realized Ireland, it's a stick. The driver's wheel is on the right-hand side. Yeah. And the stick is on the left. You're shifting with your different hand. Oh, that's going to be tough. It's going to be an absolute, and I know what's going to happen. I'm going to be driving on the left-hand side and the whole time I'm going to be like, stay left,
[44:01]stay left, stay left, stay left, stay left, stay left. And the other person in the car is going to be chatting with me the entire time telling me maybe stories about work, maybe stories about work that's from the day before. We just don't know what the stories are going to be about. And I know that that's how I'm going to die. I'm going to die pulling into a lane. Because I'm listening to a work story and I'm distracted by it. And my last thought is going to be like, oh, thank God. Well, we reached a hundred episodes, right? I mean, we're kind of good, right? Yeah, I think we're all right. Just make sure you edit it before you go. Yeah, I was going to say I got to edit it first. The other good point, if that were to happen to Rob, if the three of us recorded like 96 more episodes, all of Rob's episodes would disappear from the internet because we can only have a hundred. There would be no more record of Rob ever being funny on the internet. Oh, no, that'd be terrible. Listen, my rolling going, I cannot deal with it anymore. Russell just poured out of a huge handle of a clear liquid, just poured himself a drink. I didn't listen to a thing Matt was saying. That was so incredibly
[45:01]distracting, Russell. I mean, that was a giant pour. You know what? I made a drink for myself earlier and it ran out, but normally I've got ice and everything ready to go. And I ran out of ice. And so I was sitting here thinking, I was like, well, I can either go through this night sober or we can have to talk about the band, the Big Pink music in a week from now. And I was like, I'm going to get a drink because I'm not talking about the Big Pink album sober. That was, I wish we could take a picture and put it up on Instagram, what it looked like. Russell pouring this enormous handle and the smile he had on his face and then his response was, well, I was out of ice. Huh? What? They're both clear. Russell's like, that's clear. It'll be fine. So are you going Dublin? Are you going anywhere else that you know besides Dingle? I don't know. She's set up the car. I don't know what we're doing. She's told me a number of times. And all I remember is hearing the word Dingle because she said, we're going to drive through Dingle. And I was like, please. I did that move in college once to drive through Dingle. I got into huge trouble.
[46:00]I got fired as a chef, it turned out. Celebrity chef. The only problem is you don't like beer and that's a beer drinking country. So you might be a little bit weird at the bar. Can't you just drink whiskey and cider though? Can't you just do whiskey and cider? We're going to the whiskey. Aaron, wait. Aaron. Aaron, come on. You're talking about my whiskey inside her? Come on. I mean, I hope you're doing that too. I mean, everybody should do that as much as they can. You know what's got to be walking a really fine line is being not quite a celebrity chef, like where you're almost a celebrity chef, but you're not. So you've got to go work your ass off and work all the super late hours and nobody's excited when you make a big burger. Almost a celebrity chef is worse than being almost an NBA player or almost a rock star. Also bad because those are the kinds of people that I will go up and talk to at bars who are like, don't, why is this guy so drunk and talking to me so excited about my cookbook and like no one else is bothering me right now.
[47:01]Oh yeah, this is why I got into being a celebrity chef. It's to meet 40 year old bald men. I mean, please, where are the babes that want to use these ribs? I'm wearing a t-shirt from a tortilla company. I saw this guy out one day and I saw this guy out one day who makes the tortillas. At almost a celebrity chef, but he's got 18 followers. A tortilla company. Yeah, they're called Shulo Tortillas. They're delicious. He makes great tortillas. A tortilla company makes a shirt. That doesn't even make sense to me. Yeah, so I bought the shirt and then I happened to see him out at a beer garden. So of course I had to go over and be like, hey, I'm sorry to bother you, but I am wearing the shirt from your tortillas right now. You recognize the tortilla maker at the beer garden? Yeah, from Instagram. What? You follow him on Instagram? Yeah, that's how you know where he's selling his tortillas. They should lock your ass up. Back to the Better is going to be following that guy pretty soon. Oh, yeah. That is a tortilla. I just... Honey, get in the car. He's telling...
[48:00]Yes, right now. He's telling the tortillas right now. We have to get down there. No. Deflate the paddleboard. Get it out of there. Okay, quick. I'm going to back this car up down my driveway real quick to get to the tortilla place. I hope nothing bad happens. I can't criticize Aaron. I'm not criticizing Aaron, okay? I'm going to back off. Oh, yeah. Wait, is this a music podcast? This is your tortilla shirt. I love your tortillas. They're so much different than every other tortilla I've tasted. What are you talking about? Like, how good can a good tortilla be compared to... Have you ever had a bad tortilla? Hey, this is from a guy who's not even close to being almost a celebrity chef. Rob doesn't know. He's not a celebrity chef. When I'm doing Rob's Big Ribs and I'm walking around with those cheesy ribs with gold on top. Big burgers. You know what? You guys will get quite the discount when you come in, okay? So don't worry about that. You're going to be on the Rob's Silver Platter discount. I will not be talking to you because I will be talking to all the hot women that come in who want to eat giant ribs.
[49:00]So that is my brilliant idea. Listen, today we are talking about Taylor Swift Red and I've got a little guest appearance. I'm excited. I've got my kid. I interviewed my kid. She's like a huge Taylor Swift fan, so I interviewed her. Here we go. Tell me if we're talking about the album Red, tell me about Taylor Swift and the Red album and what that means. What's the whole theme of it? Well, Red is about a breakup. I hate to say his name, but Jake! So yeah, why do all Taylor Swift fans hate Jake Gyllenhaal so much? Um, because... It's Gyllenhaal. Yeah, I mean, the whole album was about how he was like a douchebag. Well, you can't. Don't say it. What? That's, I mean... That's not a bad word. My kids on the podcast are not just douchebags right away. But what is where do you rank this album compared to her other ones? Well, I like a lot of her more recent ones, so I'd say, like, this ranks kind of lower, but I think, like, for her overall career, it was a pretty solid album, and it was like kind of her turn into pop a little bit, because when she originally
[50:01]released the album, it was a country thing. She started out in country, but when she did the Taylor's version, she released it as a pop album, so... So you can definitely hear country on that first version of Red. Tell me, explain to me, why is she doing these Taylor versions? What are these that I'm seeing now? So, the Taylor versions are because she tried to buy her, like, original songs. Right. Or, like, her rights to her songs. Yeah. She wants to own them, but her old record label refused to give it to her, and then they sold it to a guy who she doesn't like very much, and he's in charge of her songs, and he's, like, profiting off of them. She was like, well, if I can't buy them back, I'll just re-sing it. Because she was a songwriter, so she could... Yeah, she owned the song, but she just didn't own the original record. It's like on the Grammys, they have Grammy for Best Record, which is, like, all the recording and everything, and then they have Grammy for Best Song, which is, like, the songwriting. So she owns
[51:00]the song, but not the record. Teaching these kids. Yeah. Yeah. But, so, she's... So, you're suggesting that people listen to the Taylor's version, because then the money's actually going to her. Yeah. She still gets money from the original, but it's just not as much. So, why do you think people are so critical when we talk about Taylor Swift, and people are so quick to criticize her singing about breakups? Why do you think that is? It doesn't... It aren't all singers singing about breakups at some point. Why do people... Stereotype, I guess. But, I mean, every artist is singing about breakup songs. Like, people don't really say that about Ed Sheeran. True. It's kind of a sexist thing. And it's also, like, that's what she was kind of known for, was, like, a lot of young people could believe Taylor Swift was going through at that time. Ed Sheeran sucks. I'll just say Ed Sheeran sucks. Like, that's... He's got some bangers. Some of his songs are bangers. A lot of that happened to be breakups, and I think people just kind of... Aaron, what do you think of Ed Sheeran? I think he sucks. Young girl, when it was actually, like, really talented writing, and a really good album, but I think people just don't get past the fact that it's, like, a breakup thing. I gotta ask you guys. She was 22. Like, how many, like,
[52:00]famous breakups did you guys have to the point where you could have wrote songs about it by the age of 22? I could have written songs about Jeff Richter's breakup. I mean, my... Of course, my famous song, you know, Driving Way Fast in My Car. I've Got a Fast Car, which was a parody song of the Tracy Chapman. But my question is, she's got breakup songs all over this album with multiple rumored people. Whether that's right or wrong, who knows, but, like, Rob, did you have, like, six or seven breakups where you could have made a whole album of songs about different people? No, it might surprise you, but I did not have as many breakups as Taylor Swift. I can't figure out what the difference is. I don't know. I can't... There's gotta be something where it's not... No, I do not have as many breakups as Taylor Swift. I wish I did. Her rat tail was a little broader. Her rat tail was a little broader than yours was. Right, she... Yeah, but that's a good point, Russell. She was already living in a different strategy. Where her breakups were fucking nuclear. Like, they were in tabloids and shit. Like, when... Yes. You know, when Lynn H. decided to go out with Goody L. instead of me
[53:00]first semester of freshman year, like, that didn't make it into, you know, a fucking People magazine, right? Yeah. Right? Otherwise, perfect. Because you talked about her reputation era, and you're talking about her red era. Yeah. So it's like an era. Talking about how female artists need to, like, reinvent themselves to stay new and young to the public, and so I think that's what she kind of does. So she was, like, in her original, like, Taylor thing, which was, like, kind of her first two albums, I'd say, where it's, like, young, and then she was, like, in her Speak Now. Like, each album she does, like, a whole different theme, and, like, color theme. So red was obviously very, like, breakup. Yeah, that was her... Because that was kind of her transition to pop. Yeah. And then 1989 was, like, her full-on pop, like, summer, cool girl album, I guess. And then Reputation was obviously about getting back in her... But also Reputation is, like, this bad album, you know, baddie, Taylor Swift. But it was also a lot of, like, love songs because she had just found the love of her life, Joe Allen. And so, obviously, it was a lot about that. And then she went into her lover
[54:00]era, which was her, like, neons and, like, really colorful, and that's when she started speaking out about, like, political issues and, you know, her support for the LGBTQ+. And then her more recent, through quarantine, she did a whole, like, Folklore Evermore kind of thing, which... They're two different eras, but it's, like, her really... Mature... I'm worried Aaron's gonna be triggered when he hears that. Aaron, isn't that the album that's been playing in your house for, like, a year straight or not? It is, yeah. Folklore and Evermore are the two that made my Spotify top one through five of 2020 and 2021. But, I mean, I got Stockholm Syndrome with those. I love those. Like, I'll listen to them any day of the week. I love them. But, yeah, 100%. Those are the albums. I needed to make sure Aaron was good when we heard Folklore. I'm good. Those are the ones. No, I'm good. Thank you, Russell. This is such a bummer to me that my 13-year-old gives a more... like, better music history than I ever have on every episode, just off the top of her head. It's like... She's kind of concise, I think, with it. That helps. Ugh. What a bummer.
[55:01]You hate to see... You know what the worst thing as a parent is? Is seeing your kid be better at anything than you are. It's absolutely the worst thing of being a parent. Ugh, it's the worst. Songwriting. Even about things that she never even experienced herself, but she still could write about and very, like, foresty in nature and mature. So, yeah, I think just her reinventing yourself and staying new to the public, I guess. Alright. Sounds good. Thank you so much, Amelia. I appreciate it. Okay. Do you have anything to say to Russ, Aaron, and Matt? Oh, you guys. You scared about having me on the podcast. Wimps. It's true. Alright. So then we laughed about you guys for, like, five minutes. That was a real bonding moment between us. So, let's get into Taylor Swift's Red. Fantastic. Probably I think one of the strongest first halves of an album we've ever had on this show. The second half, I don't know, but here we go. State of Race. Oh, really? Wow. I'm kind of a second-half guy. Can I ask, are we listening to the original one? Are we listening to the re-recorded version? Yeah, what's the deal? What's the Taylor's
[56:00]version? The old version, not deluxe. The 2012 version. There you go. That's not Taylor's version. Right. Not Taylor's version. Alright. So now I gotta go navigate. Trying to navigate genius during this was not an easy task. Not at all. Now I gotta go check Taylor's version. Totally. So I saw this song described as anthem rock. I thought it's a great description of it. You can see this just banging in a huge auditorium. I kind of heard U2. I heard like a similar vibe to a U2 song, right? Is that fair? Yeah. I was thinking Arcade Fire too, actually. Oh! That's a good pull. You know what I love about Taylor Swift is Taylor Swift album is full of Taylor Swift fans are also, Taylor Swift fans are also conspiracy fans. They love every little conspiracy. One of them being the liner notes. Have you guys heard about the liner notes? The liner notes have a secret message for each song. I can't tell if Rob's making shit up or he's gonna make a joke or he's telling the truth.
[57:00]Is this a Good Will Hunting joke? No. Oh, goodness. Thank you for saying that joke was good, by the way. I appreciate that. It was good. It was a long time coming. These liner notes have a secret message. So, for example, the next song, Red, the secret message in the liner notes said S-A-G SAG. S-A-G. Guess what both Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal's Zodiac signs are? No, they're Sagittarius. This sounds like the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Like, there's no way. You cannot push back on the liner notes because it's gonna be my whole thing is set up around them. You're gonna love it. So, the big secret thing is that they went Sags versus Sagittarius for their tune? I read that if you connect all the O's in the liner notes and then draw them together like a connect the dots, they look like anuses. How do you like that? Stealing my joke. That was Rob's joke. Russ's version. Rob, I'm giving your joke more
[58:01]prominence. This song peaked all the way up at number six. So, when this album came out, she did a cool thing where she released a song a week, four weeks leading up to this album. Went on Good Morning America. She went on like a hundred different radio stations. It was a huge push about this. What is this sound coming up? What is that? Is that a train whistle? What is that thing? Synthesizer? What is it? That's her voice. That's gotta be a synth. Because when you hear this song, it starts as country, right? And that was a big thing with this album. I think it's very Kathy Matea inspired. Who is Kathy Matea? Russ, what the fuck? You don't even know who Kathy Matea is? 18 Wheels and a Dozen Roses. I read there was a ganjo on, maybe the country feel was the ganjo. It's a six string banjo. I've never heard of a ganjo before. Have you guys? I have because Primus used to play it. So, when I listened to Primus, they had it. There was also a bouzouki, which was that Greek instrument that we talked about a few weeks back. I know so much about guitars and offspring of guitars.
[59:01]It would boggle your mind. I got Aaron on one side talking about God knows what and now I got Dr. Instrument, Big Organ Russell talking about his stuff. Next up, we've got Treacherous. A lot of great names for a song. The conspiracy theorists think this song is about John Mayer. Why would you ever write a song about John Mayer? That is the most boring person on the planet. You gotta give John Mayer a little more respect. You're right. No, you're right. He can play guitar. You're right, John. John Mayer lays a major pipe, man. I mean, the fact that he was like 15 years older than her and was dating her when she was like 20, I mean, he was like 35 or whatever he was. Jerry Seinfeld's like, what's the deal with dating somebody younger than you? So, all these songs are about Jake Gyllenhaal. How long did she date John Mayer or Harry Styles? Is it a month? Is she just dating? Like, how long do you need to date someone where you can write a song about them? I mean, ask Joni Mitchell, right? Blue was a bunch of breakup songs too, right?
[60:02]Yeah, totally. I Knew You Were Trouble. This got all the way up to number two on the Hot 100. I mean, this guy's banger after banger, right? Top anthem, isn't it? Yeah. So good. Aaron, what do you think about her vocals? She's doing like this vocal octave jumping there. What do you think about her as a singer? Yeah, I mean, I think she like, she's so clearly country influenced that she's definitely drawing on... You know, I'm sure that she... Because she grew up in Weir, Florida. Like, I'm sure she listened to Patsy Klein as a kid. I'm sure she listened to Loretta Lynn as a kid. Yeah. I think she listened to Kathy Matea, Reba, all those people. And I think she's pulling on all those influences. But I mean... I think she sounds good. I mean, this is pop, right? This is great pop. Listen to this. This is huge. And it's just like, you just want to yell along with it. It's so great. And this sounds like that stuff that was going on at the time, like what, like AWOL Nation? Are they the ones that did Bail? Like all that stuff. It just feels like everything on this album sounds like something else, but she made it her own, which I think is great. So the album before this really was kind of
[61:00]her saying, I'm a great writer. This album when you go on Wikipedia and you look up musicians and producers, guess how many there are on there? A thousand. There's a hundred. There's literally a hundred producers and musicians credited because she said, I wanted to bring in all these people and get a sound and find the sound I'm looking for, this kind of pop country crossover. I mean, there's dubstep in that song. Like the refrain in that is a dubstep beat that they're taking from it. Now, here's what everybody really wants to know. What about the secret message in the liner notes? For that one, it says when you saw me dancing. Okay. Now there's a video of Taylor Swift dancing with Selena Gomez to One Direction's performance. Guess who's in One Direction? Harry Styles. Somebody she dated. That song's about Harry Styles. Guys, this is, I've got some, I've got some information. I've got some pamphlets I'm going to hand you. What you've just said is the dumbest thing that I've ever heard. You're all now dumber for having me. No, no, no, no, no. This is, this is right up there with you. You get zero points. May God have mercy on you. Matt's more annoyed than when we tried to make him watch
[62:01]The Wizard of Oz during the Pink Floyd episode, isn't he? Listen, there's one song where it's about JFK Jr. and about how he's going to come back and be the real president. That's a whole different thing. We'll get into that later. It's not a big deal. I read that that song, she hit her 50th Billboard Hot 100 entry. So she had, this was her 50th song that made the Hot 100. It made her the fastest female artist to hit 50 on the Hot 100. And who did she? Be it, do you think? Who was the number one that she passed? Madonna? Matt? Fastest? Yep. Britney Spears. What do you mean by fastest? Fastest by age? I'll go with, I'll go with Whitney Houston then. The answer was Aretha. Aretha was the one who had more top, top hits. That's, that's crazy. I mean, this is, this is her fifth album. So this is her 50th. Aaron, if you say the band again, I'm going to have to go get another drink. Can you at least save it until the later? Every time you say the band, Russell
[63:01]drinks. Matt's battery is going down. Russell's BAC is going up. It's crazy because that's, that's, I mean, this is her fifth album. So for this to be a 50th song on the Top 100, she's averaging 10 per album that get on the Hot 100. I mean, that's insanity. Now, we're at the fifth song. Now, it's well known that Taylor Swift, on every fifth song, it's her most emotive song. All too well. We know that all too well. This is like when I was at the cabin and we had to dig another thing to drink water out of. It was the all too well. Hello? I thought this song was great. This is one of my favorites. I know there's a lot of huge hits. They're all over, and I don't know which ones are the big hits or not, but like this kind of built to a crescendo. It's so good. Fantastic song. It's so good. You put this album on and you were just in a good place. I don't care if she's talking about getting her heart broken over and over. It fills me with joy. Isn't that weird how that works? She's always just like stealing little melodic snippets, or maybe the writers are, and then making them her own. Like when she says, all too well,
[64:01]it's like the these small hours. Is that Train or somebody? Like everything on this album makes you think of something else, but it's still Taylor doing Taylor. Oh, Aaron, you're so good at making Russ mad. Now, here's what everybody wants to know about. What about the secret message in the liner notes? For this one, the secret message? Yeah. Maple lattes. Maple lattes. Hmm. Who did she like to drink maple lattes with? Jake Gyllenhaal? Doug Gilmore? Piece of shit. Felix Potvin? Human excrement. He's the worst. Can we also say, like, is Jake Gyllenhaal like even famous enough to be like a whole album's written about him? No, not at all. Guys, this is a song that was... You know what has caused problems in my life? When I've tried to connect all the W's in the liner notes. I heard... You don't even want to know what they look like. Russell, I heard if you connect all... You know, they got small I's. They got the dots. They're all... If you connect all the dots from the small I's, it has a cowboy hat
[65:00]that has a big X through it, which means she's done with the country, and she's moving on to her own thing. That's what I heard. Transition. I read that. Yeah. I read that. It seems like you guys are mocking the actual real research I did. Okay? Okay. There's actually a lot of proof for this. Maple lattes means that this is a Jake... I have never been more disappointed that I did not eat a cookie tonight. You said maple lattes, and I made jokes about Doug Gilmore and Felix Potvin, and no one responded. Russell, I hope you're ready to make the notes for this episode with a secret message in it, okay? And we gotta see if our fans can decode it. Yes. Next up, okay, we have probably one of the best songs on the album, I think. It's 22, and guess what? She wrote this. Guess which birthday she wrote this on? Her 22nd birthday. 21st. Deuce Deuces. What you sitting on, girl? Dubs or Deuce Deuces? I'm torn on this song. Like, it fits great on this album. It kind of is a little change of pace. It's very poppy, but like if this was like a one... This one feels like a one-hit wonder song a little bit, doesn't it? Oh, it could, yeah. It could be like it could have been
[66:00]if it was Carly Rae Jepsen, it would have been. Right here, but... Yes. Listen. I mean, you cannot not sing along with that no matter what. It's so good. So if she would have been 22... Call me, maybe. Does that mean she was born in 1989? And Matt, you've talked about 1989. What do you think of 1989 versus this album? Way better album. And we'll get to it. We'll get, you know, we'll get into that at the end of the day. She's got problems with that because she can't put out Taylor version of that because she's getting sued over Shake It Off being somebody else's song. But what's the difference, Matt, between what's the difference between this album and 1989? I think Rob's daughter, she, what was she saying? She was saying that she was having to adapt. No, was she saying she had to adapt? Or what did she say? She had to reinvent herself? Yeah. And I don't think it's so much reinventing herself. You know, I get what she's saying. She's just growing up. I mean, people grow up. She's 22 and it's her fifth album. Like, as a 16-year-old, she's not going to write the mature things that she
[67:00]has written recently, right? 1989 is just, building on everything. It's better. The stuff that Rosie listens to now, I mean, it's better than everything else she's ever done, I think. But it's all because she's just maturing. And guess what, guys? She's not singing to us when she's talking about being 22 and dressing up like hipsters or whatever. Wait a minute. You know, things like that. Do these balls look like somebody who's 22? Do you see how weird and miscolored they are? Yeah, they're very deep. When I turned 22, the biggest decision or the biggest accomplishment of my life was buying a PlayStation 2. 22. When I was 22, I was just going to say, when I was 22, I got my first paycheck for being a teacher. I got my first paycheck. How did it feel? It was $1,000. It gave me no emotion whatsoever. When I was 22... I do it for the love of the game. But wait, wait, wait. I got my first paycheck. I immediately went out and bought a 61-inch TV that was so big it had wheels. You had to wheel it around. Yes, I helped you move it into your apartment. At that point, the rent was due.
[68:00]And I was like, wait, what? I got to pay rent every month? Instead of paying rent, I had a giant TV. That was my experience of being 22. I was like, huh? This is terrible. When I was 22, I spent nine hours every Sunday in Russell's basement watching NFL football. It's true. It's so good. I met a friend the other day from high school and we went out. And mostly what we talked about is how our hearing isn't very good when we're in crowds anymore. It was just all about us getting older. It was one of the most depressing conversations ever. We were like, this bar is good. It's not very loud. We can hear each other. Do they ever say, can you hear it? And you can say, I almost do. That is one of my favorite old band things. It's either, oh, they've got great parking there. Let's go there. Or, oh, that's a quiet place. That's good. We'll be able to talk here. Which means, hey, nobody goes there. It's not a good spot. Matt, it kicks you right out on the freeway. It's great. Awesome. So this is a song she wrote after
[69:02]she got dumped and it affected her so much she got writer's block for six months. God, that'd be awesome if you dumped somebody and they're like, I couldn't do anything for six months. I'd be like, hell yeah, that's exactly what I wanted to hear. Which at that point is like 5% of her life. Six months is a long time for a 22-year-old person. It's great. You guys know how I take notes when I go out on dates. I get out my notepad and I take notes for the podcast. Do you think when she goes out on dates, does she write notes like when this guy, when I break up with him in a few weeks, this is what I'm going to sing about or not? That would be bad. If you're with Taylor Swift and she starts writing a song, you gotta be like, oh shit, this is almost over, man. I'm done. I'm out of here. This is not good. And speaking of her writing down things, the secret liner notes for that one said, wrote this instead of calling. So this is her message to that man, whoever it was, that dumped her. By the way, speaking of her getting dumped, have you ever heard of the Taylor, my favorite thing, Taylor Swift's suitcase theory? You should look it up. There's a four-year span where nobody ever saw Taylor in public. Nobody ever saw her. Yet
[70:00]they would see her bodyguards. They knew who her bodyguards were and they would be walking in and out of places and they would be carrying a giant suitcase. She's in the suitcase. And so the theory was, is that she was transported for years inside of a suitcase. This is great. And there's also videos of them rolling a giant box under the stage at one of her concerts and people are convinced Harry Styles was hiding inside. Guys, she's moving around in suitcases. Two people in the suitcase or just one? I think, well, that's the thing is that what if there was two? I mean, that would be, I mean, guys, we want to talk about hot boxing, Halibut style. Two in a suitcase. Oh my God. Making love in a suitcase would be so great. I mean, I, I'll tell you, it gives another definition to carry on. Doesn't get to watch those zippers though. You probably want to shave before just in case. Can you imagine if she's getting wheeled into a bar from outside and the suitcase pops open and it's just Taylor Swift stuffed in a suitcase. The look on her face would be so funny. It'd be the greatest photo. The earth could explode and everybody would be happy because they'd be like, this is the greatest. She just comes up and bellies up to the bar and goes,
[71:01]can I try all three of the IPAs? Just sample them. 16 ounces each. Smells so much like Halibut. We are never, ever, ever getting back together. Ever, ever, ever. This was her first number one in the hot 100. Ever. I mean, shouts, shouts to Avril Lavigne, Avril Lavigne, who did this song first. And wow. What a hot take. Sounds like you're kind of a hater boy. Not at all. I love this song. I totally love this. I mean, this song's fantastic. I just like to think about where music came from. Is this the first kind of like somewhat current pop album we've listened to on the list? Like Michael Jackson was the king of pop, but that's 25 years before this album, right? Are there any other pop albums that are kind of up high? Does Limited Encounter has eliminated its own category? For sure. Yeah. That's a good question. I don't know. Lemonade, absolutely. Yeah. Very similar, right? Like a huge team of people behind a big star
[72:01]just like everything done perfectly. I mean, that's the other thing about this album, right? It's produced. It's produced perfectly. I mean, especially maybe if you're going to listen to maybe another album by like a Canadian group later tonight or whatever, maybe it was just all done in one take and it maybe doesn't sound quite as great. Like this album is unbelievable sounding. When you guys hear that song, is it pop or country? Because it made it to number. Like a lot of people consider it a country song that made it to the Hot 100, but that sounds like pop to me. That's pop. That doesn't sound like country to me. When it comes, does it really matter? I mean, no. No. But yeah. Matt, what else are we doing here? Why are we... I mean, but like we went back and forth. We were going... Who did we do a couple... Lucinda Williams. Lucinda Williams. Yeah, we went back and forth. Like, is she rock? Is she... I mean, like, is it really Matt? I don't know. I just... No, it doesn't. Yeah, like, why do you have to put me in a box? It's either below average, average, way below average, or we could just not have to talk about what week it is. You know why this is considered country? Because then the Country Music Awards could put her on the show and be like, hey, by
[73:01]the way, Taylor Swift is coming by, the world's biggest star, and she's still doing country. Like, yeah, it doesn't sound like... And you know why she wants to quietly keep it country so that she can be on the country radios and sell that many more albums and all that stuff. I mean, it's... Yeah. Yeah. And it's not like... It's not a bad thing by any means. You connect all the R's in the album liner notes on side B. It is a picture of Taylor Swift. It looks like a constellation of Taylor Swift double dipping in the pop. Performing at the Grand Ole Opry. Yes. And the LA Bowl. Yes. Simultaneously. What she did is she... Just the R's, though, right? Just, yeah. Yes. What she did is she did a reverse... Side B, Matt. Side B of the deluxe. What she did is... Oh, Rob's trying to get his stuff off so bad. Listen, you guys don't edit this. I edit it so I know how to make it easy for me to edit. I don't just keep talking when you guys are talking. I stop because I know I can just edit myself out. It's hard to edit out three funny guys at once, isn't it? It's actually pretty easy.
[74:00]What she did is she actually pulled a reverse hootie, right? Because he went... A reverse hootie. She did a reverse hootie. And I've asked so many people if I could do a reverse. I've asked so many people, did you just... Fuck. What the fuck? Did you just take my joke? Oh, yeah. You can edit it out if you want. We got some funny guys on this podcast today. Listen, rising tide lifts all boats, okay? That's true. Appreciate you, Rob. Sorry. By the way, that We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together won a Grammy for Record of the Year, which it turns out is just for a song. How confusing is that? That it's for one song. It literally has to do with the recording, rather than the songwriting, so... Hey, Rob, I know it's been tough with us three being funny, but we all want you to stay. Guys, stay, stay, stay. Guess what? I'm going to give this... What's that? This is my sneaky beat of the week. The sneaky beat of the week? I kind of forgot what this sound clip was like, actually. I couldn't tell if it was
[75:01]re-lyrid or not. I wonder how much work I put into this sound clip. Answer, almost none. So, Russell's talking about how everybody is funny, and then I play that sound clip. I'm like, oh, great. I'm funny, too. I love the sound on this one. It's a mandolin, I think, that kind of gives it a little change-up from some of the other songs, don't you think? Oh, yeah. Yeah. The country roots coming out. It takes you back to that, like, one of those Grammy performances she did, where it's like, Pixies in the Forest or whatever. Yes. This is like her idea of a perfect relationship, what it's like. And it's so funny, because when you've been married for a long time, and listen, I've told you guys, my marriage, it's going fine. Don't worry about it. But it's mostly, my marriage is mostly, like, deciding, like, at what point do we worry about something? It's like, there's a little bit of water coming out of the dishwasher. We're like, that's fine. Kids are out until, like, 9.30. We're like, okay, at what point do we worry? That's mostly what a relationship is. It's not us putting on a football helmet after a fight. Taylor Swift featuring
[76:02]Gary Lightbody, the something that I can't read. What's this one? The Last Time. The Last Time. This is another one about Jake Gyllenhaal, I believe. Oh, this was the one, Rob. This must have struck a chord with you, because supposedly this was, they broke up when he didn't show up for her birthday party. And we know you've made mistakes during birthdays before, so did it kind of strike a chord or not? I was there. I just was editing the podcast. And first of all, I put the birthday candles in the cart. They just fell out. It's not my fault. No, I've never made a mistake. I do love all the strings on this one. The strings on this one were a little bit different. Kind of another change-up on the album. Is Gary Lightbody a real person, or is that some kind of pseudonym for someone else? He's from Snow Patrol, right? Is that what he's from? Oh, okay. I think you might be right, Russell, because the second verse is all about how then he gave a birthday
[77:01]party for the dog right after, and actually that was really one of the most annoying parts of the whole time. Didn't do anything for his wife's birthday, but had a huge party for the dog. I heard if you play that one backwards, it says that Gary Lightbody's dead. Gary Lightbody is the walrus. Can you imagine if my name was Gary Lightbody? That'd be so great, wouldn't it be like, Mr. Lightbody? Oh, did not expect this. You show up for a powerlifting meet? I love it. Yeah, so good. By the way, secret message on that one, L.A. on break. And where was Jake Gyllenhaal when he didn't show up for the birthday? L.A. I think he was working, is what I read. See? Yeah, in L.A. And I gotta say, what do you guys think? To me, being on a work trip is a perfectly acceptable reason to skip somebody's birthday. Yeah. Like, work comes first. Not if you're dating Taylor Swift. You would do whatever she says, ever. She'd be like, drink milk out of this dog bowl, nude, on the ground while I put you on a leash on you. I mean, hopefully he was still downloading her albums, even when she was
[78:02]while he was working. Hopefully he was still downloading. True. That's all you can hope for. Holy Ground. That song is fantastic. It's so good. God, it's like Sprucey doing Johnny 99. Oh, it sounds so good. And I think this was one of the different producers. This was one of the guys, it might have worked with Kanye in a few songs, but it had a little different sound, and I think that might be why. I love it. I mean, it's fun to have an album where it's all different. So good. It does kind of have that thing where, like, Bruno Mars, Kanye kind of feeling, where it's like, it's ramped up, it's going, and then the time stops a little bit, and it's kind of floating. Yeah. Love it. And I think what a lot of people want to know is, what's the secret message in the liner notes for this one? And it's when you came to the show in SD. Oh, well, let's think. Who do we have a picture of seeing a Taylor show in San Diego? It's Joe Jonas. That song's about Joe Jonas. Guys! How many guys
[79:00]did she, how many famous dudes did she date by the age of 22? That's a lot of, yeah. These have to be, like, very short interactions at this point. Yeah, that's what I was getting at earlier. Like, if you go out with someone for a month, are you allowed to write, like, huge breakup songs about them? If you sell a million records, yes. Yes. And then you make liner notes, special liner notes. It's brilliant. If I was Taylor Swift, and you're laying pipe with John Mayer, Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, Jake Gyllenhaal, guys, she's getting A1 dick. Like, that's the bottom line. Yes. She's not messing around. This is the hottest of the hot. Plus a guest spot on New Girl season two finale? Damn. And then you dump their asses, and you get a song out of it? It's brilliant. If I had a hit record for every time I got dumped by an online date, I would be the biggest selling musician in the history of the world. Russell's? How have we not brought up the idea of Russell's breakup album? You should have been writing more songs. It's true. Russell, you missed out. Maybe that's our greatest hits, Rob.
[80:00]It's a Russ breakup album. You should have been writing more songs, Russell. Oh, trust me. I want to do a greatest hits episode of just Russ's date stories. It would be nonstop. You'd have his hit song, Woman Who Swore Too Much, right? Of course, the two men in one night single. I mean, that's got to be the hottest single, right? No hablo ingles. It's a classic. Sad, beautiful, tragic. Russell's all sad. You think you're sad, Russell, hearing that? What about us? We don't get those stories anymore. Your dating life's going great. This is a disaster. That's true. It's sad, beautiful, tragic. This song was a little bit different. We talked about the mandolin earlier, and this one sounded a little bit different. It's because there's a ukulele on this one. I think we talked about a ukulele weeks ago. Matt had mentioned Tiny Tim on a Led Zeppelin episode almost probably a year ago. Oh, God. But I was listening to this, and I was like, this adds a whole new vibe to the album, to this song. I thought we could celebrate that by doing a
[81:00]list of the greatest songs ever featuring a ukulele. Or as some people call it, a uke. I'm excited. There's some really good rock singers who do whole albums with ukuleles. I love the ukulele. Matt, do you just want to take all my ones? You've already picked off one earlier. My youngest, is way into an artist called Boy With A Uke, and she wants to go see his concert in New York. I was like, yeah, I'm happy to buy tickets, but then I'm thinking to myself, wait, it's just going to be a guy playing a ukulele on stage, and I'm going to pay money to go watch that? I don't know if I can do that. That might be too much. First song on the list, Aaron, I'm going to let you introduce this one because I feel like you've been working your whole life to pronounce his name correctly, so why don't you introduce the first song on the list? Thank you. This is Brother Is, Israel Kamaka Viva Ole with Somewhere With A Rainbow. Love it. That was great, Aaron. He's a Hawaiian musician. He was released in 90, re-released it in 1993. He died a while back, but in 2010 NPR named him as the voice of Hawaii in one of his
[82:02]50 Greatest Voice series, so he's like one of the voice, he's the voice of that state. This song was famously recorded at like 3 in the morning, right? He had to, he came into the studio so late and just did this in one take. That's the legend. It is a beautiful song. Yeah. I read he did, this was like a one take, like a 15 minute thing recording in and out and he was done. Like 3 in the morning? Yeah. Something like that? Amazing. Yeah. I don't know if it was 3 in the morning, Matt. Let me check the liner notes and connect the dots. I'll be back to you in 10 minutes. Next song on the list is one of Matt's favorites. This is from 2011. He put out a whole album of ukulele songs. This is Dream A Little Dream by Eddie Vedder. What band was he in? Smashing Pump? Yeah, I think so. Soundgarden. Badfinger. Come on, is he even singing this? Is this a joke? Matt, he did a whole album of ukulele
[83:01]songs, right? He did a whole album, yeah. I mean, he's always going back to these solos and it's not my favorite thing but he's got a couple good ones. There's some movie scores that he's done with ukulele. This is not a real song. You know what? You're ripping it but this actually was in 2011 and it actually was a big thing for making ukuleles popular. Again, 2011, Rolling Stone published an article titled Ukuleles Rock. Little Axes Earn Big Fans. The whole article was about how Eddie Vedder and Taylor Swift had brought ukuleles back and made ukuleles really popular in pop culture again. I thought that was pretty cool. One of the reasons that some of the songs that are upcoming on the list came after Eddie Vedder and Taylor Swift were really using a lot of ukuleles in their songs. I don't want to say I don't want to make anybody mad or cause trouble but I do see where Matt gets his energy from the beginning of the show listening to Eddie Vedder sing
[84:01]that song. All comes full circle. Yeah, that's right. Alright, next song on the list. This is someone who came just a few years afterwards, put the ukulele in a song. I think he's from Australia. This is Vance Joy. The song is called Riptide. Do you guys know this one? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I never knew the name of the band though. This is a current song. This is a Pandora staple for my Pandora station. So good. Now, Russell, you know what he's afraid of in the dark? What is that? Dentists. Dentists? What he's afraid of in the song. I didn't know that. And listen, Russell, you loved going to things in the dark. He says, I'm afraid of dentists and the dark, but you know what would be even scarier? A dentist in the dark. A dentist in the dark. Terrifying. Yes. Open up. A little lighter. Yeah. When your dentist leans in and you reach up and try to kiss him, it's like,
[85:02]what? It's dark. Like, imagine going into a regular dentist and when they put the protective goggles on your eyes, it was a blindfold and all of a sudden you couldn't see anything, Rob. Oh, no. I don't get to see my dentist's office, like the top. I can't look up in the mirror of this person gouging my whole face out and taking my money. Your dentist has a mirror, Russell? I think you might be seeing a prostitute. That sounds... I don't think a dentist is supposed to have a mirror on the ceiling. You might be going to a swingers club. Rob, we're going to have to edit that out. I told you not to bring that up anymore. Russell's going to a swingers club and is like, hey, somebody check out my cavity. Then it turns out there's a dentist there. Oh, no. So actually, that song, Riptide, Taylor Swift actually performed that on a piano for the BBC Radio Live and it was turned into this huge hit and afterwards, she personally invited this guy, Vance Joy, to come on tour with her for Matt's favorite album, the 1989 album. So she actually... You're bringing it together. Covered the song and then brought him
[86:00]on tour with her. Tied it together. Oh, man. Can you imagine being Vance Joy and being like, hey, do you want to go on tour with Taylor Swift? Yes. Yes, I do. Please. It'd be awesome. She might write a song about a issue, though. I don't know. That's kind of a decision. I don't know if I want a song about it. Rob's big dick. He's got a big dick. It's so big and it's not weirdly shaped. It's not bigger at the bottom and then it is at the top, which is actually fine. Matt and Aaron, I think that just confirmed our discussion. The decision not to have Rob's daughter on for the whole podcast was correct. Gee, I wonder why we kind of went, oh, I don't know, another good idea. It seems like maybe not. She said, she goes, you know, I hear the show like when you're editing it. And I'm like, oh, no, I got to start wearing it. I'm a bad parent. We're going to jump forward on the next song to 2009. I think Aaron might have referenced this band earlier. This is Train. The song is A Soul System. Check out the ukulele. Hey, yeah, I hear it. You guys know this one? Oh, yes.
[87:01]Of course. Yes. And like, I think, I think Train is a band that did a lot of the sound that Taylor's doing on this album. It's a good one to have on this list. Totally. Totally. Right. Sunny. Pat Monahan, Aaron, is that the lead singer for Train? I don't know, actually. Yes, it is. So Pat Monahan actually asked Taylor Swift to collaborate on an album and they were working on a song together and they ended up writing it for a group called Sugarland. It was called Babe and then they actually wrote it together and it actually got added to the deluxe version of the Red album. So there you go. The guy from Train worked with Taylor Swift on the deluxe version, but we're not covering that one tonight. Unbelievable, Russell. You're always nailing this stuff. All right. Next one on the list. Rob told me earlier on the night, this is one of his favorite artists ever. I don't know a ton about her, but this is just a beautiful song. Ukulele's perfect. This is Ingrid Michaelson, You and I. Check this one out. Ingrid Michaelson is one of my favorites. Jenny and I go
[88:01]see her holiday show every year in New York City where she puts on a Christmas special. We've driven up to Montreal this year. When we lived in Vancouver, when we lived in Vermont, it's just, we just love her. Get into Ingrid Michaelson, people. And you strip it down and it's all you have is the singer and the ukulele. That's kind of the perfect way to go, right? So good. Let's get rich and buy everybody nice sweaters. It's so thoughtful. She's actually got a great clip on YouTube where she is singing that song at St. Olaf and has the crowd sing along and then it's like, oh, people are doing harmonies and you know all those pink tassel music majors are like, yeah, that's us. She's talking to us. The worst would have been, I would have been singing Cream of Wheat the whole time. Cream of Wheat. As an aside, when Jenny heard Russell's bit on Cream of Wheat, she laughed so hard. She thought that was the funniest thing ever. It's so good. She's like, okay, this next song is a request from Aaron in the crowd. He wants to hear a song about a balloon expedition over Antarctica. Apparently he's been studying the library.
[89:03]And there's also a song called Big Dick Rob. You were mentioning a YouTube video. Another YouTube video with Ingrid Michelson and she was singing at a concert and Taylor Swift was there and she was playing and she was killing it. Taylor Swift came out and started dancing on stage because she's a big Ingrid Michelson fan. So Taylor Swift was giving her some props. I thought that was pretty cool. I'm Ingrid Michelson. Big Ingrid Michelson. That's me. Look at my ukulele. It's the size of a guitar. All right. Normally we don't do another song. Normally we don't do this last song, but you know what? My mother-in-law called in and she said she wanted to know why we call it Beck Did It Better and I thought this was an opportunity to do that, even though it might not be the best time. We're going to do it anyways. This is Blue Moon from Morning Phase. Check this song out. You might hear the ukulele on this one too.
[90:01]I heard it. You hear it back there? And so now Taylor Swift came up with the song we were talking about earlier and she played the ukulele to come up with a song, but she did not play it on the album. But you know who did play the ukulele? The ukulele on Morning Phase and Blue Moon? Who could it be? Hey Rob, hold on. Rob, if you connect all the B's in the B side of the album, it will tell you who played the ukulele on Blue Moon. Who was it? Beck played the ukulele better. Yes. Russell, that was easily the top five list. That was so good. I like that one. The ukulele list. I could see Rob having a ukulele Rob wears plenty of like, he's wearing like a Hawaiian looking shirt tonight. I could see you having a ukulele. It definitely doesn't hurt that I have fingers that are the size of sausages trying to play on a tiny instrument. And then the ukulele is small too, you know what I mean?
[91:00]All right, the lucky one. Tiny instrument, Aaron. Tiny instruments. Yeah, I got a ukulele. I got two in the house. You got a kitchen knife. I really have a ukulele. I'm comparing it to ukulele. Aaron's like, yeah, it's a kitchen knife. Like one of the, Aaron, when Aaron compares his penis to an instrument, it's one of those guitars, but it's the big guitars that are in the mariachi band, you know, like the huge ones that are played by the littlest guys. Rob, did you know if you, if you look at the liner notes in this one, it's supposed to be about Joni Mitchell. Yeah. Yeah. It's all about the lucky one. It's all about Joni Mitchell and Kim Wilde getting out of music. And she mentions roses in there and Kim Wilde is now a gardener. So they think that it's actually a tribute to them getting out of it and not having to be wheeled around in suitcases all the time. And I thought it was about Axl Rose because she was a huge fan of Welcome to the Jungle. Well, she said that she listened to him just a little, but a little didn't cut it. And so now she listens to him a little more and more. Yeah.
[92:00]Maybe that's why she was inspired by that train whistle sounding thing earlier in the album. Remember when we heard the train whistle on the Guns N' Roses live? We had a good joke. I can't remember what the joke was about that. Now here, if you're wondering, what would it look like if Taylor Swift played with somebody who looks like an uncircumcised penis? The answer is it's Ed Sheeran with Everything Something. Can't read it. Oh, man, this album is just full of hits, isn't it? This is a song about the kids of these two singers falling in love with each other. Yet nobody cares about that because what they really care about is the secret liner notes. And if you want to look at the secret liner notes for this song, guess what they spell out? What do they spell? Hyannisport, where she was hanging out with her beau, Connor Kennedy of the Kennedy family. So, oh, so now my Q theories don't seem so crazy, do they? She's actually connected to the Kennedys. Look it up. In fact, she loves
[93:01]the Kennedys so much, this next song, Starlight, is a song about Ethel Kennedy. The message in the liner says, For Ethel, which was Bobby Kennedy's wife. Guys, she's the classic 24-year-old who's way into the Kennedy family. I gotta be honest, this would creep me out, like, if I went out on a few dates with a girl and she broke up with me and then wrote a song about, like, my dead grandma, I'd be like, okay, maybe this was not the worst thing in the world. Right, like, she must be wild to hang out with. Like, she's always writing a song. I mean, I guess that's why I'm not a songwriter. Like, she's never not looking for inspiration. That's pretty cool. You'd be crammed in the suitcase with her sphincters. What rhymes with what rhymes with Rob's big dick? I can't see the liner notes in here. Begin again. This was nominated for Best Country Song this year. Kind of a ballad at the end, huh? Take a deep breath into me.
[94:01]Slow finisher. Guys, Darren, what would you say you normally are, a slow finisher or a fast finisher? Oh, uh... I mean, slow when I can, when I can, you know, calm down about it, but it's not easy. Sometimes, you know, some people have just been a slow finisher forever, and it's actually a bigger problem. People get more mad at that. I do like, though, she finishes, I mean, if I were gonna write, you know, a musicological treatise on this album, she loves this three-note motif of da-da, and she starts the album with da-da-da, and she finishes it with da-da-da, and there's something about that. It means something to her. She keeps coming back to it. I think that's kind of cool. I mean, I would say Circle of Fifths, but, you know, what do I know about music? Not much, actually. Maybe it is. I mean, it might be that simple. I don't know anymore. Guys, let's get into the popular and patented rating system.
[95:06]Listen, okay? Is this album at 99 read by Taylor Swift? Is this just like a perfect breakup, okay? You break up, you're upset, but you still get to be friends afterwards, okay? And everybody's respectful. They're not telling you about the shape of the penis where it's wider at the bottom. I mean, it's actually kind of white at the top. And again, it's so hot. It's just hot. You don't have that. It's a perfect breakup. That is a rolling well-toned. Is this album should not be at 99. It should be higher on the list, which is a higher number, okay? Actually, later in our podcast, that would be a rolling groan. You do not like this album. It should be later. Or is this a rolling bone? This should be way up higher than 99. And next time when they do redo the list in two years, it definitely will be. What do you think? Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan? Russell, what do you think?
[96:01]I didn't really know what to expect. I've heard Taylor Swift songs on the radio, but I don't listen to a ton of the radio, so I didn't really know all the songs we're going to be on this. But you guys know me, man. Any album that's got commercial hits on it, I'm going to be on it. Any album that's got commercial hits on it, I'm going to be on it. Any album that's got commercial hits on it, I'm in for. So for me, this is absolutely rolling well-toned. There are commercial hits all over this. There's a lot of cool instrumental things going on. We talked about the ukulele. There was that... What's the other little guitar that they were playing earlier? The mandolin. There was a mandolin. There was all the strings, but there's hits all over this song. I'm all about albums that got hits on it. This is rolling well-toned. I mean, Russell, you want to hear about commercial hits. What about I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back. I want my baby back, baby back, baby back. Cheese! You realize Matt was super into our jokes about an hour ago, and we have finally beaten him down. We've broken him. We've broken him. That battery might be going down soon. Rob's giant-ass ribs with melted cheese.
[97:00]So that is... I kind of lost the thread there. Matt, what do you think? Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan? Wait, Russell never gave his rating. I said rolling well-toned. Commercial hits all over it. It probably could be rolling bone. It could be a lot of hits. So many thoughts. This is like her fourth or fifth best album, in my opinion. I like... I really like Taylor Swift. I don't know if I'm a huge fan, but I really like listening to her albums. 1989 is so much better. Folklore, way better than all of them. She's getting better as she goes. The fact that this album is on here, and there's no Madonna. I don't think we've had a Whitney Houston one yet, have we? We've got these huge, huge pop artists, and Taylor Swift's one of them. She's one of them. It feels... Why there's no Madonna, why there's no Whitney Houston, why this one's here. I don't know. I'm going to say rolling groaned. I don't think it should
[98:01]be in the top 100. I don't think it should be ahead of 1989 specifically. Do you think 1989 should be in the top 100, Matt? No. I don't know. I'm not a big pop guy. This album is not for us. I don't want to listen to breakup songs about some famous artist or whatever, whoever she was dating kind of a thing. It's not for us. That's probably why I like Folklore more than all of them, because it's just a completely different vibe than these poppy songs like this. But when we get to 1989, you guys just remember, I was touting that one big time. A lot of discussion. It's coming up in about a year. I'll tell you what, Matt. You said you're not a big pop guy, but I am. I buy the two liters all the time. What am I going to buy? Those tiny cans? Yeah, because how else are you going to do that Mentos experiment? It's true. Everybody thinks that's what science class is going to be like, by the way. It's just Mentos experiments.
[99:01]It's like, no, it's actually taking notes and then watching maybe powerlifting videos or whatever. It's not important. Aaron, what do you think? Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan? Man, I'm really swayed by both of our colleagues here. This is the first time I've ever listened to this album. I listened to it multiple times on repeat. My lady is in Matt's camp, much prefers 1989 and folklore, so I've heard those a lot more. First time through this one. I would listen to this album all day. I love great pop music, but in terms of the list, I got to say Matt's right. No Madonna, no Whitney Houston, so I'm going to have to say a rolling groan. Oh my God, you guys. You guys, awful takes all around. This is a rolling, defies categorization. So we got it wrong? Yeah, you got it wrong again? Guys, this podcast. Defies categorization? Defies categorization. Defies categorization? Yeah, it does. It's pretty clearly a pop. No, it's a pop. Is it country? It's straddling that line. This is a podcast about ranking
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