U2: The Joshua Tree (1987)

[00:00]Let's, let's, let's hit the record, Rob.

[00:01]Let's roll.

[00:02]Well, no, I, this is recording Russell.

[00:04]A lot of people like it.

[00:05]Actually, I've been getting a lot of feedback saying to people saying, Oh, Rob, I love it.

[00:08]When you talk before the intro, that's really good.

[00:10]No, just kidding.

[00:10]Nobody ever talks to me about the show.

[00:11]You guys are getting texts all over the place.

[00:13]I'm the main host.

[00:14]I set all this up.

[00:15]I'm doing this.

[00:16]I'm, I'm thinking of new innovative ways to get into people's minds and teach them about

[00:20]music.

[00:20]Like we've taught Russell and yet nobody ever texts me or said, Oh, I like the podcast or

[00:24]I like this or I like that.

[00:26]You need new friends.

[00:30]All your friends around here.

[00:31]I really do.

[00:32]All my friends are like, what's the, what is it on F1 today?

[00:35]Can I bet on that?

[00:36]It's like, Oh, actually I'm trying to spend time with my family.

[00:38]Don't worry about it though.

[00:39]But he doesn't listen to the show.

[00:40]So he's not going to know.

[00:41]2020, four friends decide to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums is decided

[00:49]by Rolling Stone magazine.

[00:50]And he put in two bets that lost too.

[00:51]This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music excoriated the order and led us

[00:56]to making this podcast.

[00:57]We are far from experts.

[00:58]We promise to do almost no research.

[00:59]And you know,

[00:59]I backed him on him too.

[01:00]Cause I thought it'd be fun, but it wasn't all opinions are our own.

[01:03]Unless you disagree, please sit back and enjoy.

[01:05]Beck did it better.

[01:07]You see how everybody else followed right, right along with that bet today too.

[01:10]Oh yeah.

[01:11]We are right.

[01:12]Yeah.

[01:12]No, everybody else knew they knew I'm the sucker.

[01:14]We are all the way up to one 35 and I'll tell you what I know last week.

[01:18]It sounded like I said, one 35.

[01:20]Okay.

[01:20]But adjust your podcast player because I actually said one 34 over and over and it

[01:25]sounded a lot like a five.

[01:26]So this is actually real one 35.

[01:27]And from 1987,

[01:29]it's the Joshua tree by you too.

[01:33]You know,

[01:34]this album,

[01:35]I love it because it's kind of a tribute to our national park system.

[01:39]Okay.

[01:39]Or as Aaron calls it places,

[01:40]we can't get oil from.

[01:42]All right.

[01:45]He always says it was such disgust.

[01:47]Yeah.

[01:47]He hates it.

[01:48]Energy crisis solved.

[01:50]Why do we have all these liberals?

[01:51]Yeah.

[01:52]There's drill and Joshua tree.

[01:53]Yeah.

[01:54]Aaron literally has Aaron literally has a tattoo that says drill,

[01:57]baby drill.

[01:59]I love fracking and it's too.

[02:01]It's it's one big drill drilling into a piece of wood and then a small drill

[02:06]coming out.

[02:06]And he was like, Oh my God,

[02:07]I thought I wore a condom.

[02:08]He spent an uncomfortable amount of time before this podcast talking about

[02:13]laying pipelines.

[02:13]Oh,

[02:15]I want to go back and say my punchline was it's a drill baby.

[02:19]Cause there's a small drill that came out.

[02:20]I was trying to think of two drills having sex with that.

[02:23]Didn't sound safe.

[02:24]Listen.

[02:24]Okay.

[02:25]Aaron does love to lay that pipeline through those wetlands.

[02:29]Those federally,

[02:30]those federally protected wetlands.

[02:32]There's another joke there,

[02:37]man.

[02:37]One you want to squeeze out just a little bit.

[02:39]Okay.

[02:41]Sorry.

[02:42]I'm trying to come up with my lyric for my.

[02:44]I was wondering what you're doing.

[02:46]All right,

[02:47]guys,

[02:48]let's turn on almost no research.

[02:50]Almost no research.

[02:51]Let's get to another part of the episode that nobody ever texts me about.

[02:53]It's the radio part where we act like it's a radio,

[02:56]but we know it's a song that I just made today instead of hanging out with my

[02:59]family.

[02:59]So let's listen right now.

[03:01]It's kind of true.

[03:02]I don't ever get comments on your parody.

[03:04]Welcome to K.

[03:05]You know,

[03:10]every episode we go along and we talk about what's going on this week.

[03:13]What do we like?

[03:14]And lately I noticed that Aaron has been talking a lot about food,

[03:19]whether it's spices,

[03:21]he has spices,

[03:22]he hates sandwiches.

[03:23]He's had our pasta.

[03:25]What's he eating out?

[03:26]But what's Aaron's favorite meal these days?

[03:29]Oh yeah.

[03:29]Aaron always tells us a bunch about what he made and what he had for lunch.

[03:38]Yes.

[03:39]Yeah.

[03:39]It's all about food.

[03:43]He tries to distract me with dessert,

[03:51]but I always remember he's a huge pervert.

[03:56]Whoa.

[03:57]Don't fall.

[03:59]For this ruse.

[04:01]He loves women without shoes.

[04:05]Oh yeah.

[04:06]Aaron loves me.

[04:08]It's true.

[04:09]That was a big switch.

[04:11]That's what Aaron calls me.

[04:13]Aaron loves to go to the beach.

[04:17]Sunglasses on so he can look at beats.

[04:22]He searches sexy feet on YouTube.

[04:26]He loves to go to the beach.

[04:28]Loves women without shoes.

[04:31]Oh, that's a hot stuff.

[04:32]Loves women without shoes.

[04:36]Makes him stiff.

[04:40]Whoa.

[04:41]Women without shoes.

[04:46]Oh, yes.

[04:56]I've been singing this all day around the house.

[05:03]Loves women without shoes.

[05:06]When you want to hear about the greatest albums of all time.

[05:13]I don't know.

[05:14]I think a few, it was probably about a year ago,

[05:16]I think Matt told Rob that the feet jokes were all played out,

[05:20]but I don't think so.

[05:21]I think they're back.

[05:22]I'm not laughing.

[05:23]Guys, I'm not laughing.

[05:24]No laughs.

[05:25]No.

[05:27]Talking about, yeah.

[05:28]What did he say?

[05:28]You're an advocate?

[05:29]I'm an advocate for Aaron.

[05:30]I appreciate you, Matt.

[05:31]It almost sounds like Matt's kink shaming.

[05:34]And I hate to, I hate to say that we are a pro kink pod.

[05:38]We're not really a pro kink podcast, are we?

[05:40]We're just.

[05:40]Just a non-shaming.

[05:42]We're not anti-kink.

[05:44]Go ahead.

[05:44]Can you guys, you guys got to help out until I find this.

[05:46]Some people like sex that is tame.

[05:50]For others, they like to treat it like a game.

[05:53]Some love oily, not rubber.

[05:56]For people like Aaron, yeah, they love sniffing feet.

[06:00]They're kinks, they're kinks, but we'll explain.

[06:03]Well, no, I'm not going to explain the feet one.

[06:06]It's pretty obvious.

[06:06]They're kinks, they're kinks, they're kinks, but we'll never shame.

[06:10]No, never, never shame.

[06:12]Yeah.

[06:13]All right.

[06:14]Yeah.

[06:16]All right.

[06:17]Listen, I've got, I've got three guys here who want to talk about you two.

[06:23]They want to talk about the Joshua tree.

[06:24]I've got Russell in.

[06:26]I've got Matt in Minneapolis.

[06:27]Russell, how are you doing?

[06:28]Guys?

[06:28]I've climbed the highest mountains.

[06:30]I've run through the fields only to podcast with you, but our listeners still haven't

[06:35]found what they're looking for.

[06:37]Oh, and I've gotten Matt in Minneapolis.

[06:39]Matt, how are you doing tonight?

[06:40]Well, when I got the text that we were going to be recording tonight, I wanted to run.

[06:45]I wanted to hide.

[06:46]Yep.

[06:47]But I'm, I'm happy to be here with you tonight.

[06:50]I'm extremely excited.

[06:51]This is awesome.

[06:52]I can't wait.

[06:53]Well, and I was worried because I got a private text.

[06:55]You know, I normally don't.

[06:56]I don't share with you guys text chains I get with us, our co-host, but I got a private

[07:00]text from Aaron saying he might not be able to come tonight because he was invited to

[07:03]an edging party.

[07:04]He was invited to an edging party.

[07:05]An edging party?

[07:07]Yeah, he couldn't come.

[07:08]So, uh, he's here tonight.

[07:10]So that's good.

[07:11]Uh, I've got Aaron in California.

[07:13]Aaron, how are you doing?

[07:14]Nothing.

[07:14]Can you talk while Rob, Rob, you told me to wait on this bed of nails.

[07:18]Can I get off here yet or what?

[07:20]Yes.

[07:20]Oh, I hate to tell you.

[07:21]Let's talk about you too.

[07:22]I had a number of bed of nails.

[07:24]Things lined up for Rob too.

[07:26]All right.

[07:29]Nobody likes it.

[07:30]All week I've been waiting on this bed of nails.

[07:31]I just want to talk about you too with you guys.

[07:33]Rob said I got to wait here.

[07:34]Listen guys, let's get right into the voicemail.

[07:36]Now you might say to yourself, Rob, did you pick the same guy for the next two episodes

[07:40]on voicemails?

[07:40]Cause the first one he leaves is certifiably insane and you don't want to trans, you don't

[07:45]want to transcribe any more text messages to the back line.

[07:47]What?

[07:48]No, that's crazy.

[07:56]This one, a couple of things, three things actually in a question.

[08:00]Number one, uh, Rosie, I did mention Dusseldorf and then say the Netherlands, uh, confusing

[08:06]times, Matt and I, we, we participated in a, uh, a baseball outreach into, uh, Germany

[08:13]and the Netherlands.

[08:13]And we spent a lot of time in Appledorn, Holland and in Dusseldorf, Germany with Cologne.

[08:18]A lot of things happened.

[08:20]Uh, it was a confusing time.

[08:23]It was a blast.

[08:25]It seems to feed it.

[08:26]Of a lifetime.

[08:27]Um, so you can understand.

[08:28]Oh, let me be very clear right now.

[08:30]This is one message.

[08:32]That's three minutes.

[08:32]I already edited part of this.

[08:34]I'm going to edit it.

[08:34]I'm still confused why this is directed to me.

[08:37]I don't know.

[08:37]I don't know.

[08:37]Did somebody say Dusseldorf?

[08:39]I don't know.

[08:39]I don't know.

[08:40]I think, I think during a recent voicemail, Aaron called someone out for getting their

[08:45]geography wrong with some countries and cities.

[08:47]Oh no.

[08:48]Okay.

[08:48]Now I feel bad.

[08:49]Oh, okay.

[08:49]I have so many stories from this trip too.

[08:51]Well, let's get through the voicemail.

[08:53]I was going to say, well, we got about a minute and 15 seconds to your story, so let's go

[08:56]through it.

[08:56]We got a couple of locations confused.

[08:58]This is where, uh, Matt and a couple other folks and listeners would, uh, eat shawarma

[09:02]every day from downtown.

[09:04]Um, you get a bunch of 18 to 22 year olds going over to Europe, especially to places

[09:11]like, um, Amsterdam and you'd think some bad things would happen.

[09:15]And in fact, the worst thing that happened was Steve from Bloomington sent the kids to

[09:19]the emergency room with a line drive up the middle, uh, poor kid had to stay over there.

[09:26]For, for, uh, uh, a couple of months just to, I'm just going to say, what do you think is

[09:31]going to happen when Europeans play baseball?

[09:32]I mean, just picture a guy right now.

[09:36]Oh, I am from Sweden.

[09:37]I love to catch a ground ball.

[09:38]You can just picture a ball bashing his face right in Europeans and baseball just don't

[09:44]mix a little support guys.

[09:49]I need a little support.

[09:50]I'm just listening.

[09:51]I'm looking at you with the pressure going on planes.

[09:53]Anyway, so that was the worst thing that happened.

[09:55]Um, I'm just listening.

[09:56]Um, for all we know, I believe he did recover.

[09:58]He was fine.

[09:59]Uh, the fact of the matter was, uh, a handful of, uh, same old baseball players going over

[10:05]to Europe, um, to, to spread the goodwill of baseball.

[10:08]We dominated, uh, pretty, pretty well, even with a couple of American all-star teams.

[10:12]So it was, it was quite fun.

[10:14]Uh, Aaron was, uh, I think you referenced three conversations.

[10:18]We must've had 16 because I believe you were involved with the NCAA tournament between

[10:24]the great, uh,

[10:26]Oh, he wants to bring that up where I do.

[10:29]Oh man, it's really going for the jugular from Colorado.

[10:32]Probably Darren from, uh, Darren from Jesus Christ.

[10:38]This voicemail, Aaron, can you explain what is the NCAA tournament?

[10:41]I, this always comes up.

[10:43]It's not my prettiest moment.

[10:44]I got really mad.

[10:45]We played some NCAA football tournament games against this other group of gentlemen.

[10:50]Uh, one of the voicemail pod versus pod.

[10:54]And I, I got beat.

[10:56]And I, I think I might've walked out before one of the games was over because somebody

[11:02]was running the score up on me.

[11:03]Aaron had a game where he was losing in video game football.

[11:06]It was like 56 to nothing in the fourth quarter.

[11:10]And the, the person he was playing against on the last play of the game ran a fake punt

[11:15]for a touchdown or went for two or something like that.

[11:18]And Aaron got pissed, literally did the throw the controller, smash the controller on the

[11:23]ground and stormed out of the room.

[11:24]I walked out before the, before the game.

[11:26]The triple zeros.

[11:27]Yeah.

[11:27]Not my finest moment.

[11:29]Not my finest moment.

[11:31]Wish that I was on a little Rocky top.

[11:33]That's right.

[11:34]That's when I, that's when I learned that song.

[11:35]But yeah, the collar is correct.

[11:37]That was, that would have been our, a great touchstone in our relationship.

[11:39]It's weird how we haven't kept in touch after that.

[11:41]I definitely did play this collar in a game of video game football where the only thing

[11:46]he was wearing was a cowboy hat and a thong.

[11:49]Oh, I, do you think that's kind of stolen valor?

[11:54]Right?

[11:56]Like him wearing a thong?

[11:57]Doesn't that seem like something I should have done?

[11:58]Like naked cowboy?

[11:59]Doesn't that seem like something I should have done?

[12:00]Like I did.

[12:01]I never did.

[12:02]He was stealing your valor.

[12:03]Yeah.

[12:04]He's stealing my valor that I think should be me.

[12:06]Right.

[12:06]But he was, I guess he was more of the naked guy in college.

[12:09]I did get busted.

[12:10]Did you guys ever get busted naked?

[12:11]Have you ever been busted naked ever?

[12:13]And don't lie.

[12:14]Have not.

[12:15]Nope.

[12:16]I have not.

[12:16]No, no.

[12:19]And Aaron, that's also not true.

[12:22]What?

[12:22]Aaron, Aaron, Aaron was the guy we did a, I think.

[12:26]We've talked about this before.

[12:27]The guy who, this person who called, remember what he wanted to throw the tobacco jug of

[12:32]tobacco.

[12:32]Yeah.

[12:33]Yeah.

[12:34]This guy organized a, uh, it was a scavenger hunt and you had to go do all these things

[12:40]and get points for like to win a thousand dollars.

[12:42]And one of the things was to wear nothing but pudding.

[12:44]And so Aaron definitely came walking out of my dorm room wearing nothing but putting on

[12:49]his junk at one.

[12:50]A lot.

[12:50]I mean, it took a lot of pudding.

[12:51]Let's be honest.

[12:52]It was like, Oh my God.

[12:56]Yeah.

[12:56]I mean, it takes a lot.

[12:58]Now, Aaron, I listen, I, I'm just going to ask one thing.

[13:04]A lot of pudding.

[13:05]Aaron, what flavor of pudding was it?

[13:07]It was chocolate.

[13:09]It was chocolate pudding.

[13:10]Oh, you know what?

[13:13]That's probably better.

[13:13]I'm eating chocolate pudding right now.

[13:14]I apologize.

[13:15]That's what's happening.

[13:16]God, my parents listen to this podcast.

[13:19]Thanks for the education, dad.

[13:21]Appreciate it.

[13:22]You know what, Aaron?

[13:22]We've said it.

[13:23]I don't know how many times.

[13:24]If you didn't do dumb things, you didn't do good things.

[13:26]You didn't do dumb shit.

[13:26]And when you're younger, what are you going to talk about when you're older?

[13:28]You know, this is just, you know, it's true.

[13:30]It's all part of it.

[13:31]And honestly, I've told you guys this in confidence before, but that brown pudding sounds a lot

[13:34]like stolen valor for me with my condom.

[13:36]I wore that was brown that one time and it threw me off.

[13:38]That one time.

[13:39]Rob, we, we did as freshmen in college.

[13:42]Like, I don't think this would, maybe it would fly.

[13:44]I don't know.

[13:44]I don't think this would fly anymore.

[13:46]Who knows?

[13:47]But we did.

[13:48]There was a tradition where women did the, the stealing the men's underwear thing.

[13:53]So whether it was the tidy whiteys, the boxers or whatever.

[13:56]When we were freshmen, the women in our dorm definitely did the steel underwear from at

[14:01]least every guy in the dorm, strung them up in the front, front yards.

[14:05]That wasn't a naked thing, but that was definitely a, like a, your, your stuff was getting put

[14:09]out there a little bit, if you will.

[14:11]Does that, does that make sense?

[14:12]Yeah.

[14:12]But you, Russell, you've never gotten caught.

[14:14]Cause I got, I, did I tell you, like I, I got caught my 21st birthday and I, I stripped

[14:20]all the way down.

[14:20]I went to the bar and got hammered, stripped all the way down except for my socks and shoes.

[14:24]Okay.

[14:25]And at the end of the day, I got caught.

[14:26]At this point, I was now totally nude running around the dorm.

[14:29]Okay.

[14:29]Well, not totally.

[14:30]Well, yeah, not totally.

[14:31]That's what Aaron wants.

[14:32]Not for Aaron.

[14:33]Aaron's like, Aaron's crying about this story.

[14:36]And I, in retrospect, probably not a great thing to do.

[14:41]Like have been naked with people haven't asked me to be naked.

[14:43]It's probably not a great thing, especially with me.

[14:45]And that's exactly what the security guard said when he walked up behind me and I was

[14:49]jumped up into the window by the hallway and I was yelling to somebody outside.

[14:52]And then I turned around and saw the security guard there and then ran.

[14:56]Approximately 15 feet into my dorm room and close the door.

[14:59]And it was like, Oh, good.

[15:00]That solves that problem.

[15:02]So that was me.

[15:05]The answer to the question.

[15:06]Have you ever been caught naked?

[15:07]Was everyone be quiet.

[15:08]So Rob can tell his story about being caught naked.

[15:10]That was the answer to that question.

[15:12]How about you, Matt?

[15:14]Did you ever have a naked moment?

[15:16]No, I can't think of one.

[15:18]I definitely followed this caller on a scooter while he was driving around on a scooter with

[15:23]just a red solo cup covering them up.

[15:26]And it was on, I think it was, it was like father daughter weekend kind of thing.

[15:31]And so it was, it was impressive.

[15:34]He's just, Hey, how are you doing?

[15:36]And you know, half the dads are laughing their ass off.

[15:38]Like, this is awesome.

[15:39]Yeah.

[15:39]How dare he, you know, kind of a thing.

[15:41]So it was, it was pretty funny.

[15:43]Then I come out and I'm like, uh, folks, there's a, those aren't chocolate sprinkles and pudding.

[15:48]It's not chocolate sprinkles and brown pudding.

[15:50]That's just my pubic hair and my very dark penis.

[15:52]I don't know why it looks like that.

[15:54]No, no, no.

[15:56]Is there more to this?

[15:57]Do we have more or can I get into this?

[15:59]No, Matt, that was all there was to the call.

[16:00]There was absolutely nothing interesting left after that, at the end of that call.

[16:03]We can edit that.

[16:05]Yeah, let's move on.

[16:05]And I think it's time for us to get into rolling.

[16:08]The only thing about that trip over to, uh, that trip over to, we were, we were in Holland

[16:13]when we were in Germany.

[16:14]And so we saw that ACDC was going to be playing like a half hour away from where we were staying.

[16:21]So it was Lars from, we'll just say Iowa now.

[16:24]Steve from Prestige.

[16:26]Steve from Prestige is West Bloomington.

[16:27]I think John from Edina, the caller.

[16:29]And I, we hopped on a train.

[16:31]We went to the Munich stadium or whatever to see, uh, ACDC and John from Edina promptly

[16:40]fell asleep and we were in the back row of the upper deck and John fell asleep at the

[16:43]concert.

[16:44]So that's how much, that's how excited he was.

[16:46]At an ACDC concert?

[16:48]Yeah.

[16:48]Well, if it had been Chris Ledoux, maybe he'd have stayed awake.

[16:51]Oh, exactly.

[16:52]You would think the Hell's Bells would be the perfect alarm, right?

[16:54]You'd wake up.

[16:55]Boom.

[16:56]You'd be like, yes, let's go.

[16:57]Uh, listen, uh, rolling on.

[17:02]So here's a new thing I'm going to do after listening to the last couple of episodes where

[17:05]everyone who had a good rolling going went last and it really sucked.

[17:08]Does anybody have a good one for tonight?

[17:09]I might edit this out, but does anybody have a good one?

[17:12]Like one they think is going to be funny?

[17:14]No.

[17:16]Actually, I think, I think this recording tonight, I might have my two weakest rolling

[17:24]goings that I've had since.

[17:26]Since we've started.

[17:26]Does that mean you want me to go first?

[17:29]No, I want somebody good to go first.

[17:32]Okay.

[17:33]I'll go first.

[17:34]Okay.

[17:35]You go first.

[17:35]I'll go first.

[17:35]Listen, guys, I've got a major problem in my life.

[17:38]Okay.

[17:38]And that is, there's one thing I've always counted on.

[17:40]Yeah.

[17:41]Major.

[17:42]One major problem.

[17:43]It doesn't have anything to do with boils or anything like that, does it?

[17:45]No.

[17:46]No.

[17:47]But don't check out the Beck did a better Tik Tok.

[17:49]What it's into.

[17:49]I have, listen, I want to apologize to you guys.

[17:52]I have wrecked the Beck did a better Tik Tok.

[17:53]It is like a weird mix.

[17:56]Of women in bikinis and popping blackheads.

[17:58]And it never, you don't.

[18:00]So I was right.

[18:01]It's, it's such a whipsaw going back and forth.

[18:04]It's crazy.

[18:04]Do not get out of there.

[18:05]It's just terrible.

[18:07]Oh my God.

[18:08]I feel like an animal when I'm not using my.

[18:10]Why are you, why are you apologizing?

[18:11]Is this something that's going to like affect us?

[18:13]Or you think that we actually go like watch the Beck did a better Tik Tok?

[18:16]We don't know.

[18:17]I think if you went on there and you saw like who we're following,

[18:20]it's this weird amalgam of like a lot of like wrestling stuff right now.

[18:25]And then like,

[18:26]I'm just going to, I'm just going to, I'm going to break the news to you.

[18:29]What?

[18:30]None of this surprises either of us,

[18:32]anybody on this podcast that you're into weird shit and weird Tik Tok.

[18:36]Yeah.

[18:36]So we're all good, man.

[18:37]Don't worry about it.

[18:38]You be you.

[18:38]We're all right.

[18:40]For the, for the sake of clarity, Rob, I've also,

[18:42]when you send out Tik Tok links to us,

[18:44]I have never once clicked on any of that.

[18:46]Aaron did the other day.

[18:48]Aaron did the other day.

[18:48]And it was a good one.

[18:49]I click on them.

[18:49]I watch them in the browser.

[18:50]I don't, I haven't downloaded the Tik Tok.

[18:52]Did you see the one where they were the Dudley boys body slam May West?

[18:55]I mean,

[18:55]come on.

[18:56]That was so good.

[18:56]Anyway,

[18:58]I probably saw that in a real show.

[19:01]Oh my God.

[19:02]Right.

[19:02]So good.

[19:02]Listen,

[19:03]but I've got a problem.

[19:04]I've got a major problem.

[19:05]There's one thing in my life I've always counted on.

[19:07]And that is that anytime people start talking about cooking,

[19:13]when I was younger,

[19:15]we had kids.

[19:16]And so I got on a recipe website where they would give you a recipe for

[19:20]every day of the week.

[19:21]You went and got the ingredients.

[19:22]It was kind of like,

[19:23]and so I was using it and I would like,

[19:25]I didn't interact with them on social media.

[19:28]And so this company said,

[19:31]Hey,

[19:31]can we interview you as the stay at home dad at the time?

[19:34]I was a stay at home dad for this cooking company.

[19:36]And I was like,

[19:37]yeah,

[19:37]sure.

[19:37]So there was a huge webpage they made with me talking about it.

[19:41]And it said kitchen hero,

[19:43]Rob.

[19:44]And then my last name.

[19:45]And anytime we would talk about any,

[19:49]you know,

[19:49]anytime you talk about cooking at work,

[19:51]you know,

[19:51]with friends or whatever,

[19:52]you'd be like,

[19:52]well,

[19:52]I don't know.

[19:53]Just Google kitchen hero,

[19:54]Rob,

[19:54]see what comes up.

[19:55]And my picture in the article would instantly come up.

[19:57]And I'd be like,

[19:58]hell yeah.

[19:59]Everybody thinks they have taken the site down.

[20:02]I don't know.

[20:03]There is no,

[20:05]if you Google somebody,

[20:06]I did it the other day and somebody Googled it says,

[20:07]it doesn't say anything.

[20:08]So now I look like a fool and a liar to that person.

[20:12]And I had to explain like,

[20:13]no,

[20:13]there used to be a site that had me in the kitchen.

[20:15]It's the saddest thing I've ever heard in my life.

[20:16]You can bring it back,

[20:17]right?

[20:18]I texted it to Jenny and she said devastating.

[20:20]It was her quote.

[20:22]She was like,

[20:22]this is bad.

[20:23]It's your whole identity.

[20:25]But,

[20:25]why did you never tell us about that?

[20:27]We've been doing this podcast for three years.

[20:28]I never heard about it.

[20:29]I,

[20:30]I was just,

[20:30]and you know what?

[20:31]It was a really good picture of me too.

[20:32]I looked really buff when I was doing it.

[20:34]And now it's gone.

[20:35]Yeah.

[20:36]I don't know.

[20:36]Cause I,

[20:37]I did all the cooking and then eventually I had to stop because Jenny said,

[20:39]all the meals I made were way too fatty.

[20:41]I was like,

[20:42]yeah,

[20:42]that's why they're so good.

[20:43]They're delicious.

[20:44]Right.

[20:44]Plus it didn't make sense when I had like a five-year-old and a three-year-old

[20:47]and I was making like Cajun jambalaya on rice.

[20:50]And they were like,

[20:51]can we just have cheese and white bread?

[20:52]And I was like,

[20:53]no,

[20:53]you'll enjoy this kimchi soup.

[20:54]So this kind of used to be your claim to fame on the internet,

[20:59]Rob.

[20:59]If people were looking for you,

[21:00]this is what they would have found.

[21:01]And you would have been proud of that.

[21:02]And now it's gone.

[21:03]100%.

[21:05]Yeah.

[21:05]It's kind of disappointing,

[21:06]isn't it?

[21:06]Oh,

[21:06]it's,

[21:07]it's,

[21:07]it really feels like,

[21:09]I feel like my show is on HBO and they deleted it.

[21:12]And like,

[21:12]nobody's ever going to know about it.

[21:13]Nobody's it's,

[21:14]it's a,

[21:14]it's actually a pretty big part,

[21:16]a joke in my life.

[21:16]That's gone.

[21:17]Like my,

[21:17]one of my standby jokes.

[21:18]And I might surprise you.

[21:19]I have a number of standby jokes that I go to when I need to.

[21:22]What if,

[21:24]what if one day this podcast was deleted from the internet,

[21:27]Rob,

[21:27]how would that make you feel?

[21:28]Oh,

[21:30]I wouldn't feel anything.

[21:31]Cause I must be dead because there's no way you'll ever pry this out.

[21:33]Although I did think it was very sweet.

[21:36]I texted you guys the passwords for all of our stuff to make sure you can log

[21:39]in and like update the,

[21:40]and somebody wrote back.

[21:42]Is everything okay?

[21:43]And I was like,

[21:43]well,

[21:43]that's nice.

[21:44]Well,

[21:45]yeah,

[21:45]I was like,

[21:46]you're out here like training myself.

[21:48]I'm kidding.

[21:49]It's like you're training very heavily,

[21:51]intensely,

[21:52]you know,

[21:52]you have that age where like the widow maker can happen.

[21:55]I was like,

[21:55]is Rob in the ICU?

[21:56]Wasn't me.

[21:57]Yeah.

[22:00]No,

[22:00]I don't know.

[22:01]I don't know.

[22:01]There's something about me.

[22:02]You look at,

[22:03]you think to yourself,

[22:03]Oh,

[22:03]imminent death for sure.

[22:04]So I better,

[22:05]you know,

[22:05]just keep tabs to make sure.

[22:07]Cause it would be a bummer.

[22:08]Wouldn't it?

[22:09]If we just had like,

[22:09]I think the worst would be if I passed away and we had like three episodes

[22:12]that were ready to be uploaded.

[22:13]We couldn't,

[22:14]you guys were like,

[22:14]I have no idea.

[22:15]I can't do anything.

[22:16]Let's call Jenny and ask her for the passwords.

[22:19]She'd be like,

[22:19]my phone is on the freeway.

[22:23]So I can't answer right now.

[22:25]You needed to burn that thing to DVD long ago.

[22:29]You needed to like make some physical copies of this thing.

[22:31]I know.

[22:32]And meanwhile,

[22:33]my,

[22:33]my video where I put hot sauce on my feet is still out there.

[22:36]You know what I mean?

[22:36]Like that's the one thing people know me from.

[22:38]That's the thing your kids are going to remember.

[22:40]Just terrible.

[22:40]Okay.

[22:41]So listen,

[22:41]my plan to ask who had a good rolling going instead of it happening

[22:44]organically did not work.

[22:45]I'll say this.

[22:46]If that is our best one,

[22:47]we might as well just go to the,

[22:49]hang at the triangle right now.

[22:51]Come on.

[22:53]But there are a lot of things like that though,

[22:54]Rob,

[22:55]right?

[22:55]Like,

[22:55]I mean,

[22:55]you will never play a football game ever again.

[22:58]Right.

[22:58]And you,

[22:59]for the people that don't know,

[23:00]Rob was the center on the football team at St.

[23:02]Olaf and was very,

[23:03]very good at his job.

[23:04]I was like this podcast and all that stuff.

[23:05]Right.

[23:06]But like there's,

[23:07]there's,

[23:07]there's chapters in life and this is,

[23:10]you know,

[23:10]maybe not so big,

[23:12]but it's,

[23:12]this is one of the chapters you could easily go and find that you were the

[23:15]kitchen hero.

[23:16]Right.

[23:16]And now it's gone.

[23:17]And like,

[23:18]it's just suddenly,

[23:19]he drops like that.

[23:20]And all of a sudden you got to move on to the,

[23:21]and just so I,

[23:22]I feel for you a little bit because now,

[23:24]I mean,

[23:25]now what are you going to do when people ask you,

[23:27]you know,

[23:27]anything interesting about you?

[23:29]It's just not as good when I'm like,

[23:30]Oh yeah,

[23:30]I have two gold points in bridge.

[23:32]If you look my name up,

[23:33]like that's exciting.

[23:35]When I played competitive bridge,

[23:36]that's a normal thing for a guy to do.

[23:38]How about you,

[23:40]Aaron and Matt?

[23:40]What,

[23:40]what would people find about you?

[23:42]Or like,

[23:42]what do you think,

[23:43]what do you want your legacy to be of something unique or interesting?

[23:47]That's that's about you.

[23:49]I,

[23:50]I,

[23:51]I kind of feel like when,

[23:52]I mean,

[23:54]that's a little different,

[23:55]right?

[23:55]Like the,

[23:55]the Googling,

[23:56]the Googling Rob and then the kitchen hero.

[24:00]Sure.

[24:00]That's just,

[24:01]that's a pretty good party trick in itself right there just to have that pull

[24:05]up.

[24:05]But you know,

[24:06]I don't know.

[24:06]I mean,

[24:06]I kind of like moving onto the next chapter in life and just kind of letting

[24:10]the other one just hang out there and let your buddies talk about it and

[24:13]things like that.

[24:14]I don't know.

[24:15]So maybe for like three or four straight episodes,

[24:16]they leave voicemails reminding you of stuff you've done and,

[24:19]and,

[24:19]and maybe get a good laugh out of it and video game.

[24:21]Like Aaron,

[24:21]dude,

[24:22]if people are looking up air,

[24:23]do they see that you were ever in an opera or anything like that?

[24:25]That's the one thing I would have said is I,

[24:29]I don't think if you just Googled me,

[24:30]that would show up because I wasn't in anything that prominent.

[24:34]You'd have to get pretty far down into the results level enough where they

[24:39]had a website.

[24:40]I don't,

[24:40]I mean they had websites,

[24:41]but I,

[24:42]yeah,

[24:42]I don't think,

[24:42]I don't think it would come up.

[24:44]So I,

[24:44]yeah,

[24:45]that would be the only thing is it would be great if anything I did on

[24:48]stage,

[24:49]would,

[24:49]would be on the internet anywhere.

[24:51]And Rob's trying to pull it.

[24:52]We were like,

[24:53]just happening.

[24:53]We were just old enough where we couldn't,

[24:56]you know,

[24:57]it wouldn't just automatically be up there.

[24:59]Right.

[24:59]I feel like in like 2006,

[25:01]all of a sudden,

[25:01]everything is all of a sudden on YouTube or something like that.

[25:04]But everything we did before that,

[25:06]this is all that comes up when you Google Aaron.

[25:08]So weird.

[25:10]Oh yeah.

[25:11]Fuck.

[25:12]Yeah.

[25:19]If I had a calling card,

[25:23]it would be nice.

[25:24]If anything for my performing career,

[25:26]he's putting so much hot sauce on there,

[25:29]but it turns out I've been served by hot sauce on feet,

[25:33]far more views.

[25:34]My mouse doesn't work anymore.

[25:36]Look at the fuck.

[25:38]All right.

[25:39]Nevermind.

[25:42]I can't click.

[25:44]I can't get out of it.

[25:45]Rosie rolling.

[25:47]Going.

[25:47]I was going with you.

[25:49]I was going.

[25:49]All right.

[25:50]So I've been thinking about we're into March in the school year.

[25:53]I think some school districts are on spring break.

[25:56]Mine is not yet.

[25:57]And I'm starting to understand Rob,

[25:58]like this feels like this shit is really the dog days of the school year,

[26:03]man.

[26:03]So my kids in kindergarten and at the beginning of the year,

[26:07]I signed up to be the volunteer coordinator for library time.

[26:12]So all that meant was I had to make sure there was a volunteer for library

[26:16]hour on,

[26:17]it was Thursday morning.

[26:18]Now it's Friday.

[26:19]So it was my job.

[26:20]The coordinators.

[26:21]It was my job to make sure a lot of volunteers showed up,

[26:24]but it's sort of become like,

[26:26]I mean,

[26:26]so we live super close to school.

[26:28]I live two minutes from school.

[26:29]So what's your name?

[26:30]You want to volunteer at the library?

[26:31]Okay.

[26:32]Let me just do a quick Google here.

[26:33]Let's see what.

[26:34]Yeah.

[26:34]Fuck.

[26:35]Yeah.

[26:35]Okay.

[26:35]I don't know.

[26:36]I don't know if this is really a thing.

[26:40]If I Google Aaron's feet,

[26:41]what comes up?

[26:41]Oh,

[26:42]it's only 35 songs that somebody is like,

[26:44]my job to coordinate volunteers.

[26:47]And it wasn't even my main,

[26:49]I was like the backup coordinator,

[26:50]but I've had to like step in and from time to time.

[26:54]And then it sort of morphed into,

[26:55]well,

[26:56]if no one else can do it,

[26:57]I'll go ahead and go over and volunteer in the library because I'm really

[27:00]close by.

[27:01]And I often can move my work schedule around.

[27:03]Oh,

[27:03]you're so sweet.

[27:04]This was no problem.

[27:05]Like there were plenty of volunteers.

[27:07]It was never a problem,

[27:08]but it has gone.

[27:09]It is super dried up.

[27:11]Like now every week I send a message like,

[27:14]Hey,

[27:14]here's your weekly reminder that,

[27:16]um,

[27:16]you know,

[27:16]there's volunteer slots in the library.

[27:18]And then like,

[27:19]no one's signing up.

[27:20]So this last Friday I was watching the volunteer thing and hoping somebody

[27:24]else would sign up two weeks ago.

[27:25]My friend,

[27:26]Brendan props to Brendan,

[27:27]who is the head T-ball coach of my son's team showed up for voluntary for

[27:30]library.

[27:31]So props to Brendan for showing up.

[27:33]And this last weekend I was like on Friday,

[27:36]it got,

[27:36]got the Thursday night.

[27:37]I put out the Hail Mary.

[27:38]Nobody wanted to do library.

[27:39]So I signed up to do,

[27:41]you got to start shaming these people,

[27:43]Rosie.

[27:43]Yeah.

[27:44]So I did the library that was on Friday morning at nine.

[27:47]And this morning I,

[27:49]I woke up with pink eyes.

[27:50]So I'm starting to understand why no one wants to be in the library anymore.

[27:55]So that's how it's really going with me.

[27:58]Rosie,

[28:07]all you gotta do,

[28:07]you keep,

[28:08]do you keep attendance on who's actually volunteered and who hasn't?

[28:11]Yeah,

[28:11]I know.

[28:11]Okay.

[28:12]You got to send out an email.

[28:14]Yeah.

[28:15]You know,

[28:16]there's only one that's in the actual where you could see,

[28:19]Rosie's wife at gmail.com.

[28:20]Then everybody else is BCC and say,

[28:22]if you're getting this email,

[28:23]you have not volunteered this year.

[28:25]Right.

[28:25]We need you to pull your weight by the end of the year.

[28:28]Yeah.

[28:28]Let's just shame these people.

[28:29]Matt,

[28:30]one week,

[28:30]Rebecca,

[28:31]one week,

[28:31]Chris,

[28:32]Greg,

[28:33]fucking Greg.

[28:34]Come on,

[28:35]Greg.

[28:35]Let's go.

[28:36]All y'all.

[28:37]Yeah.

[28:37]Right.

[28:38]I would,

[28:38]I would send an email doing the opposite.

[28:40]I would say thank you to these people for volunteering.

[28:42]Yeah.

[28:43]Or that,

[28:43]or that,

[28:44]go that way.

[28:45]Yeah.

[28:45]See,

[28:46]he's out.

[28:47]He's out in Oakland though.

[28:48]They go a little,

[28:49]they don't go passive aggressive in Oakland.

[28:50]They just go right at it.

[28:51]Apologies to all the kids that had to be out with pink eye.

[28:53]Listen,

[28:53]that's on me.

[28:54]Okay.

[28:55]I like farting on my pillow.

[28:59]So yeah.

[29:00]So then yeah,

[29:01]I had to run down for some eye drops too.

[29:03]I was,

[29:03]I took a picture of the pharmacy chair for you guys.

[29:05]Cause I had to go get my eye drops.

[29:07]So you couldn't sit in it though.

[29:09]Did you?

[29:09]No,

[29:09]of course I didn't sit in it.

[29:10]No way.

[29:10]It was sick.

[29:11]It was gross looking chair too.

[29:12]You were just covered in pink eye.

[29:14]Not going to do it.

[29:15]Yeah.

[29:16]Do you think the pharmacist ever looks out and sees the person sitting in there

[29:19]is just like,

[29:19]I fucking hate my life.

[29:20]Like why would someone sit there?

[29:24]Why can't this chapter of my life close and move on?

[29:27]It's terrible.

[29:28]So Aaron,

[29:29]do you,

[29:30]you have currently pink eyes.

[29:31]So you're waking up and your eyes are all crusty and shut and everything.

[29:34]Yeah.

[29:35]We'll go this morning with a crusty shut eye.

[29:36]Yeah.

[29:37]Yeah.

[29:39]So that was unfortunate.

[29:40]We had like,

[29:40]we had plans today with friends.

[29:42]Nope.

[29:42]Those are out.

[29:42]Like friends aren't going to come over and hang out and have lunch with you.

[29:45]When you have pink eye,

[29:46]you feel like a pariah.

[29:47]So what,

[29:47]so Hey,

[29:48]so what have we learned?

[29:49]What have we learned about volunteering?

[29:50]Rosie?

[29:50]Yeah,

[29:51]man,

[29:51]you guys listen,

[29:52]I'm you're,

[29:53]you are right.

[29:53]I'm trying only leads to failure.

[29:55]I mean,

[29:56]way too deep.

[29:56]I've been doing the fundraising for the walkathon.

[29:59]Now I got to figure out,

[30:00]I got Ruth.

[30:00]I got the wrong logo for Ruth.

[30:03]I got her web logo.

[30:04]I need the t-shirt logo instead.

[30:05]Now she's not responding to me.

[30:07]I got,

[30:08]I'm it's,

[30:08]it's too much.

[30:09]You guys are right.

[30:10]What are you,

[30:10]what are you fundraising for Aaron?

[30:12]For the walkathon?

[30:13]For the PTA?

[30:14]Like what?

[30:15]For what?

[30:15]What schools?

[30:16]Proceeds for what?

[30:17]Schools are nonstop fundraising,

[30:18]Russell.

[30:19]All the time.

[30:19]All the time.

[30:20]Why don't parents just sell forking a little money and not have to do all the work?

[30:24]We do.

[30:25]We do.

[30:26]And they do.

[30:27]But they also are like,

[30:28]okay,

[30:28]they're going to have,

[30:29]and then get ready to when they're like,

[30:31]okay,

[30:31]your kid,

[30:31]if your kid sells 3,600 magazine subscriptions,

[30:36]they will get those Weebles or whatever.

[30:38]They will get every rubber duck.

[30:39]My kids went through a thing where they're like,

[30:40]dad,

[30:41]we can get every kind of rubber duck.

[30:42]I was like,

[30:42]I will give you $50 each to not have me deal with this shit.

[30:46]I don't want to.

[30:47]And then,

[30:48]because you know,

[30:48]the guy,

[30:49]the guys who run that shit to the fundraisers are the skeeziest,

[30:52]sketchiest guys.

[30:53]Like imagine your whole life is going around running fundraisers at public elementary schools

[30:58]and taking half the profit for literal work that kids do selling catalogs and like magazines

[31:02]and stuff.

[31:03]It's such bullshit.

[31:04]It's fucked up,

[31:05]repugnant shit right there.

[31:06]Yeah.

[31:07]It's no,

[31:09]my job.

[31:09]I told you,

[31:09]my job ended up being the guy who's like cold calling local businesses.

[31:13]Like,

[31:14]Hey,

[31:14]do you want to sponsor the walkathon and be on the t-shirt?

[31:17]People don't even want that for their real job.

[31:19]Let alone to have to do it for free.

[31:20]Yeah.

[31:21]It's,

[31:21]it was,

[31:21]it was a bad move.

[31:22]It was a bad move.

[31:22]But I think,

[31:23]I think now,

[31:24]I think I just signed up for a two year term being the vendor management coordinator.

[31:27]They were like,

[31:30]I was like,

[31:31]I don't think I'm doing that great at this walkathon fundraising thing.

[31:33]And then they're like,

[31:34]Hey,

[31:34]I'm just doing the walkathon fundraising.

[31:35]Why don't we sign him up for the other thing?

[31:37]This is one of those things where when you die,

[31:39]you're at the pearly gates or whatever.

[31:41]Sick fetish,

[31:42]Rob.

[31:42]You're at the pearly gates or whatever.

[31:43]They don't give you extra credit for doing that type of thing.

[31:46]Like there's no part in life where they say,

[31:49]damn,

[31:49]you know what?

[31:49]We appreciate that you volunteered for two years at that elementary school.

[31:52]And your kid's not going to know either.

[31:54]That's the other thing.

[31:55]You got to wait till like high school where your kid actually knows that you actually

[31:57]care.

[31:57]Guess what?

[31:58]Aaron will be doing it in high school.

[31:59]Cause I can tell you from experience,

[32:00]those parents get on the list and you call them constantly.

[32:03]They're like these parents.

[32:04]And it's,

[32:05]they're just like,

[32:05]they are idiots.

[32:06]And we circle with big letters and we write idiot all around it.

[32:09]Cause we know those parents will come in at our beck and call at any time.

[32:13]Oh,

[32:13]we need somebody to sell treats outside the basketball game.

[32:15]Oh,

[32:15]we need somebody to drive all the kids to a hockey game three hours away.

[32:19]Aaron's like,

[32:19]okay,

[32:19]I'll do it.

[32:20]I'm on the list,

[32:21]man.

[32:21]So that's,

[32:22]that's how it's really going with me,

[32:23]man.

[32:23]I got pink eye.

[32:24]I got settled with the volunteer management duties.

[32:26]It's,

[32:26]it's rough out here.

[32:27]That's terrible.

[32:29]How's it rolling?

[32:30]Go with Matt.

[32:30]But I will say this,

[32:32]my rolling going was better than Aaron's.

[32:33]And if you think that's true to do hashtag Rob to the Beck's line to,

[32:37]uh,

[32:37]eight,

[32:37]I didn't know.

[32:38]Robbie here.

[32:40]I just thought you guys might want to just hear about my life.

[32:42]Cause I thought you were here because you care about me,

[32:44]but I guess I was wrong.

[32:45]If you think Aaron complaining about elementary school kids is a better go hashtag.

[32:49]Aaron to the back line.

[32:50]Okay.

[32:50]Let's see.

[32:51]I don't even tell you about computer class.

[32:53]That shit was terrible.

[32:54]Go ahead,

[32:56]man.

[32:56]I,

[32:58]uh,

[32:59]I,

[33:00]I've had a conversation.

[33:01]This is a while ago.

[33:03]It's on the list,

[33:03]but I don't think that I should ever go to Las Vegas for work ever again.

[33:08]Oh,

[33:08]because I was talking to this guy and he was in,

[33:13]you didn't do the catch anything on the Peloton seat.

[33:15]Did you catch anything?

[33:17]No,

[33:17]I did not catch anything.

[33:19]I did not catch anything,

[33:19]but he was talking about that.

[33:21]His,

[33:21]he was a medical device sales rep.

[33:24]Okay.

[33:24]And it's,

[33:25]they make a crap ton of money if they do it well,

[33:28]but they're also just the,

[33:29]again,

[33:30]it's a,

[33:30]it's a different breed of people that can,

[33:32]you know,

[33:33]be going that hard drinking and entertaining and happy hours and all of this for medical.

[33:38]So,

[33:38]and so it's a different breed of people and they can't just fire them,

[33:41]you know?

[33:42]So what this guy's company used to do is they would send new people,

[33:48]who weren't going to work out,

[33:49]they would send them to Vegas and then they would get them all fucked up and

[33:53]have them just mess up something,

[33:55]you know,

[33:56]either talking to a vendor for failure,

[33:58]setting them up for failure.

[33:59]And that's,

[34:00]that was their double secret way of how they got people fired.

[34:03]Ah,

[34:04]your expense report,

[34:05]you know,

[34:05]you're not supposed to do this.

[34:06]We got to get rid of you.

[34:07]Oh my God.

[34:08]Listen,

[34:09]H J can stand for anything.

[34:11]Okay.

[34:11]There's a lot of things.

[34:12]There's a medical device.

[34:14]What is good?

[34:14]H J stand for heart,

[34:16]heart jammer.

[34:18]Okay.

[34:18]I,

[34:18]I,

[34:18]I think we sell,

[34:19]Oh,

[34:19]you know,

[34:19]the Oh 200,

[34:20]the heart jammer.

[34:21]I've been selling that.

[34:22]But then,

[34:23]you know,

[34:23]but they were talking about like there was,

[34:24]there was these salesmen and they would have to get,

[34:26]they would have to get like seven grand in cash advances off of their company

[34:31]credit card because they were taking people to the strip clubs.

[34:34]And I'm like,

[34:35]what?

[34:35]Like that just seemed out of control.

[34:39]So I don't know,

[34:41]PSA for anybody who's out there.

[34:42]If your company is sending you out to entertain people in Vegas,

[34:45]I think you just say,

[34:46]no,

[34:46]this year is getting set up for failure.

[34:47]You know,

[34:48]like,

[34:48]and it,

[34:48]the whole,

[34:49]the whole work thing.

[34:50]And I'm not going to ask Russell to weigh in too much on some of this stuff

[34:54]because we don't need that out there in the world.

[34:56]But you know,

[34:57]like my,

[34:58]my company still has like company cell phones.

[35:02]Like,

[35:02]you know,

[35:03]back when cell phones first came out,

[35:04]everybody just got a company cell phone.

[35:05]Right.

[35:06]So the old guys in the office still have company cell phones.

[35:08]And the one guy's like telling all the new analysts like,

[35:11]Hey,

[35:11]well the company will pay for a cell phone.

[35:13]And so then the analysts are like,

[35:14]well,

[35:15]this will be fun.

[35:15]You know,

[35:15]they'll get it.

[35:16]We'll get a company.

[35:16]I go,

[35:17]do not get a company cell phone.

[35:18]Do not do that.

[35:20]So the first time you accidentally like,

[35:23]yeah,

[35:23]look at the wrong website or something like that.

[35:26]They know you get in trouble.

[35:27]Hey,

[35:27]I got two phones.

[35:28]I got a company phone.

[35:29]I got two phones.

[35:30]Yeah.

[35:31]And I got it.

[35:32]But I got a personal thing of like not looking at anything or just using a

[35:37]straight up phone calls.

[35:38]I text Anna in an emergency on my company phone.

[35:42]That is it.

[35:43]I don't use it for anything personal.

[35:44]Not because you hear of like,

[35:46]you're like my phone.

[35:47]That's their phone.

[35:47]I'm not going to miss a toe emergency.

[35:48]I'm going to bust.

[35:50]If I don't see some toes,

[35:51]it's an emergency.

[35:52]No,

[35:54]I don't mess with it.

[35:55]I don't do anything personal on my company phone.

[35:56]The teachers,

[35:57]Rob,

[35:58]I've heard teachers have great stories about like their kindergartners

[36:01]getting an iPad sent home.

[36:03]And then all of a sudden there's all sorts of porn on it from,

[36:05]you know,

[36:06]so then they have to have,

[36:07]they have to have conversations with the parents.

[36:09]Like,

[36:09]uh,

[36:10]you know,

[36:10]these are school issued devices.

[36:14]I've heard good stories.

[36:17]Maybe you're better off not having people call you.

[36:18]You don't need to have people volunteer.

[36:19]You don't need these sickos around.

[36:20]Right.

[36:21]Maybe that's why no one's volunteering.

[36:24]Well,

[36:24]I got busted with the porn last time.

[36:26]Hey,

[36:26]let me see that magazine catalog.

[36:27]Okay.

[36:29]Nevermind.

[36:30]Pest me that wins a fire book.

[36:32]I don't know if that's not,

[36:33]they're probably not even pissing any of these.

[36:36]Russell rolling,

[36:41]going,

[36:41]I was going to the U rolling,

[36:42]going with me.

[36:43]I now know we're in the middle of the NCAA tournament right now.

[36:46]I was curious.

[36:47]I know we're doing some,

[36:48]uh,

[36:48]um,

[36:49]definitely legal gambling where we're not routing money through Venmo to New

[36:54]York city is legal.

[36:56]We're definitely not doing that,

[36:58]but I was asking,

[36:59]um,

[36:59]this was the first year,

[37:01]one of the first years where I never filled out a bracket or anything.

[37:03]Are you guys still into filling out brackets and doing that type of thing?

[37:06]Or have you reached the age where you just don't care anymore?

[37:08]I mean,

[37:09]somebody did send you a bracket to fill out for $10 to get in on a,

[37:13]you know,

[37:14]a friendly little wager with everybody.

[37:15]Just cause I said your kids could be in it.

[37:17]I know why he didn't,

[37:18]I said it was kid friendly and the rest was like,

[37:20]absolutely not.

[37:21]We'll not participate.

[37:22]I'll,

[37:23]I'll tell you why I didn't join in a second,

[37:24]but I'm curious.

[37:25]Did,

[37:26]did,

[37:26]are you guys into that type of thing or not?

[37:28]I,

[37:28]you know,

[37:29]so yeah,

[37:30]with the kids now,

[37:31]just for the boys,

[37:32]boys are 11 and seven,

[37:34]right?

[37:34]Like,

[37:34]and now they're kind of getting into it and fucking Leo one,

[37:37]like second place a couple of years ago.

[37:39]So now he thinks it's easy money.

[37:40]And I think he's in second.

[37:41]Well,

[37:42]he was at the beginning of the day,

[37:43]he was in second place.

[37:44]And so again,

[37:45]he thinks it's easy money and he's really good at picking,

[37:47]you know,

[37:48]so,

[37:48]but then at work,

[37:49]um,

[37:50]just started one just for the fun of it with,

[37:54]you know,

[37:54]no money or anything.

[37:55]Cause it's like,

[37:56]well,

[37:56]just,

[37:56]just be a part of it,

[37:57]you know,

[37:58]kind of a thing with just to get people to be a part of it,

[38:00]but nothing serious,

[38:02]you know,

[38:02]it's not no like $500 buy in brackets or anything like that.

[38:05]So I don't really care if I do one anymore,

[38:08]but if I can just easily fill one out and submit it easily or,

[38:11]you know,

[38:12]then have at it,

[38:13]but gone are the days of worrying if like,

[38:16]you know,

[38:16]Duke's matchup against,

[38:18]against Tennessee is going to be something that we,

[38:20]you know,

[38:21]need to worry about the four versus the five,

[38:23]you know,

[38:23]who cares?

[38:24]I do it Russell,

[38:25]because it's a talking point for my sisters and my parents,

[38:28]but other,

[38:29]I,

[38:29]so I run a bracket thing,

[38:30]but other than that,

[38:31]like I used to print them out and highlight all the wins and cross out all

[38:34]the losses and really keep track.

[38:35]And now I haven't even checked to see how I'm doing.

[38:37]I,

[38:37]it's just good.

[38:39]Just getting old is the worst.

[38:41]How about you,

[38:43]Aaron?

[38:43]Do you fill one out anymore or not?

[38:44]No.

[38:45]And honestly,

[38:45]it's because the number one thing I'm learning about sports gambling,

[38:48]is that it's way more fun when you stop thinking,

[38:50]you know what you're doing.

[38:51]If you just choose a strategy and stick to your strategy.

[38:55]And if it wins and wins,

[38:56]if it loses,

[38:57]it loses,

[38:57]it loses,

[38:58]it loses,

[38:58]but you know what you were cheering for.

[39:00]That's way more fun than trying to be like,

[39:01]Oh,

[39:01]I think I know how this is going to go.

[39:03]So that's what I've learned from gambling with you guys.

[39:05]A group makes it all more fun to like where you're actually talking about

[39:08]where the brackets stuff.

[39:09]Cause everybody's picking different stuff.

[39:10]It's more fun to all be on the same side.

[39:12]Yeah.

[39:12]So Rob,

[39:13]I didn't sign up for your bracket.

[39:14]And yes,

[39:15]you're probably right.

[39:15]If I knew there were kids involved,

[39:17]I probably wouldn't have played because of that.

[39:18]But the real reason I didn't sign up for this is actually something that's

[39:22]coming up.

[39:22]I'm in,

[39:23]I don't know if you guys do fantasy baseball,

[39:24]those types of things.

[39:25]I'm in a couple of leagues at that and I'm,

[39:27]I'm missing deadlines.

[39:28]I'm just not prepared.

[39:29]And I've realized like,

[39:31]I have just stopped reading stuff recently.

[39:33]I,

[39:34]I,

[39:34]I,

[39:34]when I'm,

[39:35]we've got a text chain with about 13 of our buddies and some guy named

[39:38]1420,

[39:39]who I'm still not really sure who it is.

[39:41]But we've got this text chain and I was the guy who bets on F1.

[39:45]Let me tell you,

[39:45]I didn't have my,

[39:46]my phone.

[39:47]I didn't have my phone on and cause it kind of what didn't have my phone up

[39:48]all the time.

[39:49]And I would look and I'd see like 185 missed text messages.

[39:52]So I'd pull it up and I'd read like the first two or three and then just be

[39:56]like,

[39:56]Nope.

[39:57]And I'd scroll right to the bottom.

[39:58]So I've reached the point where I not only am I missing text chains,

[40:02]but like I'm getting emails from buddies about like fantasy baseball.

[40:06]Like I'm offering you this trade.

[40:07]I got nothing.

[40:08]I'm ignoring them all.

[40:09]I'm just,

[40:09]I'm not even deleting them.

[40:11]I'm not even clicking on them.

[40:12]You wouldn't believe the amount of time I spent editing my texts for that

[40:15]text chain,

[40:16]just to make sure they're,

[40:17]nice and tight for Russell.

[40:18]And then I turned,

[40:19]turned out he's not even reading them.

[40:20]Not even reading them.

[40:20]And I'm sending like three to four to five,

[40:22]six,

[40:23]seven a day.

[40:23]Sometimes all in a row.

[40:24]Nobody responds.

[40:25]I still send them.

[40:26]Russell's not even reading them.

[40:27]That's so weird.

[40:28]I would like to read them,

[40:29]but it just becomes,

[40:30]there's a point where it just doesn't work.

[40:32]Right?

[40:32]Like if you've got a hundred and 200 messages and they're continuously going,

[40:36]you're not going to take 20 minutes to read them.

[40:38]And a lot of times,

[40:38]are you guys?

[40:38]They're referencing like something that just happened in a basketball game.

[40:41]And so I was like,

[40:41]well,

[40:41]I don't even understand the context of this at all.

[40:44]You know,

[40:45]Russell,

[40:45]I got roped into a fantasy league this year at work for no cash,

[40:48]no nothing.

[40:49]And everybody would come up and talk to me and be like,

[40:51]wow.

[40:52]And I had a great team.

[40:53]I had the best team probably of any fantasy I've ever had paid zero

[40:56]attention to it ever.

[40:57]And people come up to me like,

[40:58]wow,

[40:59]close one this weekend.

[41:00]Huh?

[41:00]And I was like,

[41:00]yeah,

[41:02]I was like,

[41:02]I have no idea.

[41:03]I never changed my lineup.

[41:05]Never did anything.

[41:05]I was like,

[41:06]yep.

[41:06]Yep.

[41:06]And they were like,

[41:07]God,

[41:07]you're just so,

[41:08]they just would talk to me about it endlessly.

[41:09]And I was like,

[41:10]I don't guys,

[41:10]I,

[41:11]this is the least important thing in my life right now.

[41:14]So,

[41:14]so I am in,

[41:15]I'm in a couple of fantasy baseball leagues and I essentially continue just

[41:17]to do it just for the camaraderie of the draft or hanging out with my

[41:20]buddies or whatever.

[41:21]But it was a weird feeling and knowing at one point I was somewhat

[41:25]respected in these leagues.

[41:27]Like I knew the players I was trying to win.

[41:30]I made moves and everything.

[41:32]And I'd say for about a four to five year period.

[41:34]Now I've just been out to lunch.

[41:36]I don't know any of the players.

[41:37]I don't ever change my lineup.

[41:39]I ignore trade offers.

[41:40]I remember I was at a draft last year where like the guy who I would say,

[41:44]they would previously had been considered like the idiot in the league was

[41:48]officially making fun of me.

[41:49]And I was like,

[41:49]Oh,

[41:49]this isn't good.

[41:50]So what do you guys think about?

[41:52]Like now you're the idiot in the league.

[41:54]You keep doing it and then just show up for the fun or what do you do?

[41:56]Oh yeah.

[41:57]You keep showing up and who cares?

[41:59]Russell,

[41:59]who somebody,

[42:01]some guy who used to be the edit cares that he's better at fantasy baseball

[42:05]than you now.

[42:06]Like,

[42:06]come on.

[42:07]I think the problem is only a real piece of shit would quit a fantasy league.

[42:11]I was in the league for at least,

[42:14]at least five years before I decided to get out.

[42:16]So I,

[42:16]I definitely did the idiot in the league bit and now I'm out.

[42:19]So I,

[42:19]you know,

[42:20]you can do a little both.

[42:21]And then my last question would be,

[42:23]you were kind of mentioned this Rob about the league you're in.

[42:25]I've also reached the point where I'm not really sure,

[42:29]like I'll be at the bar.

[42:30]Like I was at a bar with a coworker,

[42:32]someone,

[42:32]they started talking about the tournament and I was like,

[42:34]like they asked me like,

[42:36]who are the one seeds?

[42:36]And I was like,

[42:37]I have no clue.

[42:37]I don't know the one seeds.

[42:39]I don't know the seeds.

[42:40]I don't know who won the big 10.

[42:41]I don't know anything.

[42:42]Do you guys try to play it off?

[42:43]Like,

[42:44]you still know what's going on or do you just like,

[42:46]dude,

[42:46]I have no clue.

[42:47]What do you do?

[42:47]Do you,

[42:48]do you play the game or do you just throw your hands up with college

[42:52]sports?

[42:52]I just say the incident plays a cartel and I don't believe in it.

[42:54]So I'm not,

[42:56]I'm not going to pay attention.

[42:57]Oh,

[42:57]these kids get a free college and they get NIL money.

[43:00]Like Aaron's all mad about it.

[43:02]It's like,

[43:02]you know,

[43:02]they're getting an education.

[43:04]Why don't they care?

[43:05]I've done everything.

[43:09]Russell,

[43:09]just podcast.

[43:10]Now I have to keep us on stuff because I've got like,

[43:13]I have to keep on top,

[43:13]I have to keep on top of New York sports because I teach,

[43:15]I got to know what's going on to talk to these kids.

[43:16]I got to know what's going on,

[43:17]like youth culture a little bit.

[43:19]So I'm on Tik TOK.

[43:20]That's the only reason.

[43:21]And it turns out youths are way big into bikini babes and blackheads,

[43:25]which is pretty cool.

[43:26]Cause that's what I'm into too.

[43:27]Is to walk around New York city.

[43:30]I'm constantly wearing noise,

[43:31]canceling headphones.

[43:32]I have never once taken my headphone off and said to somebody,

[43:36]what'd you say?

[43:36]And then been happy with whatever has come out of their mouth.

[43:38]Next.

[43:39]Like I just ignore everybody who tries to talk to me all the time.

[43:43]Are we done?

[43:44]Is that it?

[43:45]Is that our,

[43:45]did everybody go?

[43:46]Yeah.

[43:47]Yeah.

[43:48]We could have,

[43:48]we should have,

[43:49]we should have cut that 40 minutes.

[43:50]I know the best.

[43:51]Listen,

[43:52]hashtag Rob,

[43:52]hashtag Russ,

[43:53]hashtag Aaron,

[43:54]hashtag Matt,

[43:54]who had the best rolling going.

[43:56]And don't say not Rob,

[43:57]just cause you know,

[43:58]I'll be furious.

[43:58]Okay.

[43:59]I'm also the only one who sees all the results for the backline.

[44:02]Don't,

[44:03]don't troll me.

[44:03]All right,

[44:04]let's get it.

[44:04]Let's get into the album.

[44:06]Oh yeah.

[44:07]I mean,

[44:08]I am getting,

[44:08]um,

[44:09]Oh no,

[44:10]not this one.

[44:11]It's the,

[44:12]I can never,

[44:13]I can never find this one.

[44:14]Oh,

[44:14]talk about the album.

[44:15]There it is.

[44:15]I'm getting,

[44:16]I thought of you guys,

[44:17]cause I'm getting evaluated as a teacher this year.

[44:19]And I was like,

[44:20]Oh,

[44:20]you better not say shit about my teacher.

[44:23]I'm so good.

[44:24]Can you please make a rolling going about your evaluation?

[44:27]Oh my God.

[44:28]That's all I want.

[44:28]That's all I want.

[44:29]Well,

[44:29]I noticed you yelled and screamed at a lot of the kids when they tried to approach you.

[44:32]And then something very bad happened when one tried to get you a catalog to buy magazines

[44:35]out of.

[44:36]Uh,

[44:37]listen,

[44:37]we are talking about Josh,

[44:41]the Joshua tree,

[44:42]our second U2 album on the list.

[44:43]We've already done.

[44:44]We've already done.

[44:45]Uh,

[44:45]what was the other one we did?

[44:46]Uh,

[44:47]we,

[44:47]um,

[44:48]and I claimed vociferously that this was a better album.

[44:52]So we will see if that is correct.

[44:54]Uh,

[44:54]this is the album that basically it's their fifth album.

[44:57]This is the one that made them superstars in the U S like they were popular before.

[45:01]This made them absolute number one,

[45:03]like hit U2 that you know,

[45:05]and love this album ended up winning album of the year,

[45:08]uh,

[45:09]which they,

[45:10]uh,

[45:10]they went against,

[45:12]listen to this,

[45:12]listen to this,

[45:13]murderous rove albums that they beat Whitney by Whitney Houston.

[45:16]Okay.

[45:17]Oh,

[45:17]bad by Michael Jackson.

[45:18]Oh,

[45:19]trio,

[45:20]which is actually,

[45:21]we talked about that Dolly Parton,

[45:22]Linda Ronstadt,

[45:23]Emmylou Harris.

[45:23]They were up for that.

[45:24]And then sign of the times by Prince.

[45:27]And they decided the times decided that this is the best album of the year.

[45:32]Even did the Irish spelling on side of the times.

[45:34]And they still beat him.

[45:35]That's that's easy.

[45:37]I cannot think of anything clever to that.

[45:39]That you think that's what Prince was doing.

[45:40]It was like St.

[45:41]Patty's day.

[45:42]He was like,

[45:42]sit at home.

[45:42]Yeah.

[45:43]Taking a shamrock shake.

[45:45]He's like,

[45:45]Ooh,

[45:45]this is my mama's milkshake.

[45:47]I love this stuff.

[45:48]I didn't.

[45:48]Did anybody get a shamrock shake this year?

[45:50]I,

[45:50]I intended to get one and I didn't,

[45:52]I never made it.

[45:53]Can you not get one anymore?

[45:54]Do they shut that down right away?

[45:56]I don't know.

[45:57]I mean,

[45:57]I'm asking.

[45:58]Oh my God.

[45:59]My kids came home on St.

[46:00]Patrick's day.

[46:00]They're like,

[46:00]dad,

[46:01]there are so many people out in the city right now drinking.

[46:03]And I was like,

[46:04]Oh,

[46:04]you're right.

[46:04]I got to go.

[46:05]Uh,

[46:06]the theme of this album was America myth and the reality of America.

[46:10]And basically,

[46:11]uh,

[46:12]what happened?

[46:13]What happened was Bono after,

[46:14]after his last album,

[46:14]forgettable fire was more of like a soundscape kind of experimental album.

[46:17]And he hung out with Keith Richards and Mick Jagger,

[46:20]and they were talking about blues and country.

[46:22]And Bono was humiliated that he didn't know anything about these albums

[46:24]because Bono had grown up a punk fan.

[46:27]All he knew was punk music.

[46:28]So he basically did the very cool Bono thing where we talk about a little

[46:32]bit with rattle and hum.

[46:33]Um,

[46:34]but he got way into like blues and soul and gospel music.

[46:38]And so he tried to incorporate that into this album.

[46:40]And,

[46:41]uh,

[46:42]he tried to make an album that was a little bit more,

[46:43]a little bit more focused with this one,

[46:45]uh,

[46:45]but still had all the layers that were in their last album,

[46:47]which is why we get the sound that we do on this album.

[46:49]And what they really wanted in this album was a cinematic quality to the

[46:53]songs that would make you visualize being outdoors in the great spaces of

[46:57]the United States.

[46:58]And it really,

[46:59]I think it does evoke that.

[47:00]Like when you realize that this album kind of takes on a whole new meaning

[47:03]because it does sound big.

[47:04]It sounds like huge.

[47:05]And it's awesome that this guy was like,

[47:07]Hey,

[47:07]you know what kicks ass outdoor spaces in America.

[47:09]And it's like,

[47:10]yeah,

[47:10]actually,

[47:10]you know what fucking bottle you're fucking right.

[47:13]Yeah.

[47:13]I mean,

[47:14]that's the thing is he is pretentious.

[47:16]We,

[47:16]there's no doubt,

[47:16]but he's also right.

[47:17]Like he's not wrong about that much.

[47:19]Okay.

[47:20]And man,

[47:20]actually give me a big thumbs up.

[47:22]He loves the stuff.

[47:22]Uh,

[47:23]this album sold 16.7 million albums.

[47:26]It's above purple rain.

[47:28]It's above Whitney Houston and right below hybrid theory.

[47:34]Now,

[47:35]do you guys want to tell me who,

[47:36]what album is hybrid theory?

[47:38]Tribe called quest,

[47:41]isn't it?

[47:41]No,

[47:41]that's the low end theory.

[47:43]Hybrid theory of course is by Lincoln park.

[47:45]This was beat out by Lincoln park and album sales,

[47:48]which just shows 17 million albums.

[47:50]Yeah.

[47:51]And can you wonder why our nation is in shambles right now?

[47:53]But Lincoln park is one of the best selling albums of all time.

[47:56]Uh,

[47:57]so let's get into the Joshua tree guys.

[48:00]We've had a couple albums now where they've had three murderers in a row.

[48:05]I mean,

[48:05]this is a banger after banger where the streets have no name.

[48:13]It's quintessential U2 opening year,

[48:17]right?

[48:18]I mean,

[48:18]really no one else sounds like this to my mind.

[48:21]I'm sure there are listeners who can tell me someone else who they sound like,

[48:25]but they're really unique.

[48:27]Matt,

[48:28]I don't know.

[48:28]We'll see what you think of the sound,

[48:29]but what do you think of this as an opener?

[48:31]I thought this was about as,

[48:32]as fantastic,

[48:33]but an opener as you get,

[48:34]like it kind of builds,

[48:35]builds,

[48:35]builds.

[48:37]I used to,

[48:37]and then I saw this documentary about David Evans and how he makes this.

[48:42]And everybody thinks he's just a complete fraud for you know how he does this,

[48:47]like overdubbing to get to where this is.

[48:50]And so from like a studio album,

[48:53]yeah,

[48:53]it's great.

[48:54]And this line right here,

[48:55]you know,

[48:56]like it did,

[48:57]it opens up to what Rob was just talking about,

[48:59]about being in the open spaces,

[49:00]right?

[49:01]Like,

[49:01]yeah,

[49:02]it's great opener.

[49:02]You're saying that he couldn't actually do this live to this?

[49:05]No,

[49:06]I don't think he can,

[49:06]you know,

[49:07]and I don't,

[49:07]I don't really have,

[49:08]I can't say that with definitive knowledge,

[49:11]but I don't think that,

[49:12]that you can do that live.

[49:14]That's actually an interesting,

[49:15]that's a very cool point because it's going to come up next week too,

[49:19]because like the studio as an instrument had a long history kind of starting

[49:24]with Sergeant peppers.

[49:24]And so if they're still doing it in 1986,

[49:27]you know,

[49:27]it's,

[49:28]it's an interesting thought.

[49:28]Like,

[49:29]do you care about how the thing was produced or do you just like to hear how

[49:31]it sounds?

[49:32]Yeah.

[49:34]Next up.

[49:34]So you're like,

[49:35]wow,

[49:35]that song rocked my face off.

[49:36]Better get to the next one.

[49:37]This was nominated for song of the year is beat by Graceland,

[49:40]which is I'm sure bump Bono.

[49:42]That is some,

[49:42]some apartheid breaking guy beat him in this,

[49:45]but it was inspired by gospel and really set up by the,

[49:50]by the drum beat here.

[49:53]They liked the drum,

[49:54]which a lot of times I don't know if I hear gospel in this one,

[50:01]this plaintive melody is like the first,

[50:06]you know,

[50:07]the first,

[50:07]this right here,

[50:08]this is it.

[50:09]I love it.

[50:12]This song.

[50:13]I know it's big.

[50:14]I know it's like,

[50:15]I like the song.

[50:18]I just was crushing the gospel.

[50:20]And the gospel is a huge genre.

[50:23]Like gospel is not a theater.

[50:24]Yeah.

[50:25]This is a fantastic album for the opening three.

[50:28]When it comes to commercial hits,

[50:30]right?

[50:30]Like these,

[50:30]everyone had these on their wind amp players.

[50:32]These are all like,

[50:33]these are massive.

[50:34]Yeah.

[50:34]Not everybody.

[50:35]I never pushed play on this album or any of these songs on purpose in my life,

[50:42]but I do.

[50:42]I do like the songs.

[50:43]Wow.

[50:44]So next up was actually the lead single off this album.

[50:48]And I love the wave form of this song.

[50:50]If you look at it on my player here,

[50:52]it just constantly gets louder and louder.

[50:54]It grows the entire song.

[50:56]And this is their first number one hit in the U S with,

[51:00]or without you.

[51:01]I mean,

[51:04]maybe there's some Depeche motor in excess in here,

[51:06]right?

[51:06]They must be a little bit related to some of the other British sound that was

[51:11]coming out at the time.

[51:12]Oh,

[51:13]for sure.

[51:13]Yeah.

[51:14]I do think,

[51:15]I do think the edge is a pretty like the edge combined with Brian,

[51:19]you know,

[51:19]who helped produce this.

[51:21]I think that they're pretty open to Davis,

[51:22]lots of echoes,

[51:23]lots of interesting effects.

[51:27]I like most of the song.

[51:32]I think there's one or two other ones that do this,

[51:33]but the song,

[51:34]I think is pretty heavy on the tambourine.

[51:36]You can kind of hear the tambourine in the background on this one.

[51:39]I don't know if you guys noticed that at all.

[51:40]It's been shimmery.

[51:42]Yeah,

[51:44]I can hear something back there.

[51:45]Yeah,

[51:47]I got it.

[51:47]Right.

[51:48]Yeah.

[51:48]And remember,

[51:48]we've talked before about how I don't like when the lead singer fails on the

[51:52]band,

[51:53]they should be up there playing the tambourine.

[51:54]I heard it here.

[51:55]And I think the tambourine adds something.

[51:57]So I thought we could do a quick list of the greatest tambourine songs of all

[52:01]time.

[52:01]I love it.

[52:02]I love this idea.

[52:03]Did Bono play tambourine?

[52:06]I,

[52:06]in my mind's eye,

[52:07]I can see him.

[52:08]I don't know.

[52:09]He did it better.

[52:10]Oh,

[52:10]God.

[52:11]Oh,

[52:12]I don't know.

[52:12]You'd have to ask Matt.

[52:13]He watched the documentary.

[52:14]No,

[52:14]Russell,

[52:15]I'm just going to ask you right away.

[52:16]I'm sure it's part of your bit,

[52:17]but why is tambourine man not on this list?

[52:20]Cause Russell hates absolutely hates Bob.

[52:26]Bob.

[52:26]Yeah.

[52:27]I think we already,

[52:27]isn't that on a,

[52:29]the freewheeling or it's on one of them we've already covered.

[52:31]I believe,

[52:31]isn't it?

[52:32]You're not even doing songs.

[52:33]We've covered at all.

[52:34]And I actually think if you go back and look,

[52:36]I don't know if the tambourine is that I don't think there's that much

[52:38]tambourine on temporary.

[52:39]I think it,

[52:40]I think some of them are kind of a,

[52:42]a bait and switch.

[52:43]Like we talked about earlier,

[52:44]Rob,

[52:44]sometimes the tambourine doesn't have a lot of tambourine and switch is one

[52:47]of the magazines that was in the catalog.

[52:49]So that was good.

[52:50]I got that.

[52:51]It was like,

[52:51]you know what bait and switches about women with switches.

[52:54]And then you'll never guess what you like.

[52:56]Is it still funny?

[52:58]It's still funny,

[52:59]right?

[52:59]And then up at the cabin,

[53:00]they have the switch and bait.

[53:02]That's for the wife swaps.

[53:04]Speaking of wife swaps,

[53:05]the first guy on the list,

[53:08]the first guy on the list,

[53:09]I think he wife swapped with George Harrison,

[53:12]right?

[53:12]He stole or something,

[53:13]right?

[53:14]So the first song on the list that features the tambourine is after midnight

[53:17]by Eric Clapton.

[53:18]- Oh,

[53:19]that's a good song.

[53:20]- Listen to that tambourine.

[53:21]- Do you hear that there?

[53:22]- Well that tambourine is going man.

[53:25]Oh,

[53:25]shake your tambourine.

[53:26]- Right?

[53:27]- Yeah.

[53:28]- After midnight.

[53:29]- That's a good song.

[53:30]- I knew he stole all this music,

[53:34]but this is a,

[53:34]this is a good song,

[53:35]right?

[53:36]I think he stole it from a guy named JJ kale or something like

[53:40]that.

[53:41]He actually wrote the original.

[53:42]About five,

[53:43]six years before this one.

[53:45]I'll tell you what though,

[53:45]if it was after midnight and somebody around you was shaking their tambourine,

[53:49]you just want to fucking kill them,

[53:50]right?

[53:50]Like nobody has a sound.

[53:54]Oh,

[53:54]let me turn on my quick sound machine.

[53:57]Let me just wait a minute,

[53:58]guys.

[53:58]This joke is going to be really good,

[53:59]but you got to hold out for just a second.

[54:01]- Aaron,

[54:02]while Bob's looking that up,

[54:03]what would you think if your son,

[54:05]the trained musician from two trained musicians wanted to be a tambourine player

[54:09]in the band growing up?

[54:10]- I mean,

[54:10]we'd say do,

[54:11]if you're going to be the,

[54:12]the tambourine player,

[54:13]you,

[54:13]you should be a good tambourine player.

[54:14]- You're the best one you can be the best one you can be.

[54:16]And have fun doing it.

[54:17]Okay.

[54:17]Okay.

[54:17]You know,

[54:18]sometimes people will say,

[54:25]why do you still do the podcast?

[54:26]Nobody listens.

[54:27]You stay up late.

[54:28]It's obviously affecting your health negatively.

[54:29]And the answer is for jokes like this.

[54:31]Can you imagine if it was like,

[54:34]sweetie,

[54:34]okay,

[54:34]I'm ready to go to bed.

[54:35]Let me turn on my sound machine real quick.

[54:36]It sounds like a rattle.

[54:41]Sounds like,

[54:42]wow.

[54:43]This guy's really letting it all hang out next door.

[54:44]I love that tambourine.

[54:45]It's so relaxing.

[54:46]Well,

[54:49]if I heard this song and it was 1968,

[54:50]it would have probably caused me to dance with the music.

[54:53]And that's the next song on the list from Sly and the family.

[54:55]- Oh,

[54:56]yes.

[54:56]- Listen to that tambourine.

[55:01]- Man.

[55:02]- You hear it there?

[55:03]- Yes.

[55:03]- Sometimes it's kind of faint.

[55:04]You gotta really listen for it,

[55:05]but.

[55:06]- I'm coming.

[55:07]- It really adds something to the song.

[55:08]Don't you think?

[55:09]- It definitely does.

[55:10]- Listen to that.

[55:12]- And actually you too covered this song once

[55:16]at a concert in Mumbai in 2019.

[55:18]They covered dance to the music by Sly and the family stone.

[55:21]- Are you serious?

[55:22]- Yeah.

[55:23]- That would be awesome.

[55:24]- This also, I gotta say,

[55:24]if I could have one thing be on the internet of me,

[55:28]I played trombone for the combo

[55:31]that backed up the high school show choir.

[55:33]And we, they did this song and I had a little,

[55:35]I had a little special trombone section on that song.

[55:37]And if that, if that existed on the internet,

[55:39]I would tell everyone to Google it,

[55:41]but I don't think it does.

[55:42]Let's see if I can.

[55:42]- Was this when you guys were burying the bone?

[55:44]- Yeah, I was burying the bone somewhere, man.

[55:46]You guys know?

[55:47]- Next song on the list is from 1966.

[55:52]- Aaron, I don't mean this to be mean,

[55:53]but the highlight of your life is so sad to me.

[55:55]- Well, you're, the highlight of your life

[55:58]is getting two burritos from the same lady

[56:00]or burritos from different ladies.

[56:02]Like, I mean, come on, everybody's got their own thing.

[56:04]- That's true.

[56:05]- That literally is the highlight.

[56:06]- You're right.

[56:07]I get it.

[56:08]- Actually, Aaron, I think that was the most

[56:09]erotic part of his life.

[56:10]Like that is favorite.

[56:11]- Oh, yeah, my neighbors next door

[56:13]were definitely hearing this all night long.

[56:15]- Next song on the list, this band,

[56:21]this song's from 1966.

[56:23]And I don't believe that the band actually played

[56:25]any of the instruments on this,

[56:26]but it's the Monkees, "I'm a Believer."

[56:28]- Oh, listen to that.

[56:34]- Hear that tambourine?

[56:35]- Yeah.

[56:36]Does anybody know who these musicians actually were?

[56:39]It's like- - I don't know.

[56:40]I just, I read that the Monkees,

[56:41]the Monkees sang the song,

[56:42]but didn't play any of the instruments in this.

[56:44]And I think them not playing some of the instruments

[56:46]actually started some of the disagreements between them,

[56:49]which eventually led to their breakup.

[56:50]- Oh, yeah, no, they all got picked up

[56:52]'cause they were good looking

[56:53]and they wanted to be on the TV show.

[56:54]They was like, "Hey, we gotta make a TV show

[56:56]about the Beatles, but they can't do a TV show,

[56:59]so let's do the Monkees."

[57:00]And guess what?

[57:01]I watched a ton of the Monkees growing up.

[57:03]I watched that show all the time.

[57:04]Couldn't tell you a single thing that happened,

[57:05]except they do get pushed in a bed down the street

[57:08]at one point during the introduction.

[57:09]- All right, quick, quick trivia question.

[57:11]Do you guys know who wrote the song, "I'm a Believer"?

[57:14]- Oh, "I'm a Believer."

[57:17]I'm gonna say Stevie Wonder

[57:18]'cause it seems like he wrote almost everything.

[57:20]- It's actually the next artist on this list.

[57:22]It's Neil Diamond wrote "I'm a Believer."

[57:25]And the next artist on the list is Neil Diamond.

[57:28]The song is "Cherry Cherry" from the same year.

[57:30]Do you hear it back there?

[57:34]- Oh, yes, listen to that.

[57:37]- Sounds great.

[57:41]- I forgot, he wrote a lot of songs, didn't he?

[57:44]- Kind of an upbeat...

[57:46]I think that tambourine adds like a spice.

[57:48]It adds a little bit of a upbeat sound to these songs.

[57:51]Don't you guys think?

[57:52]- Has there ever been a musician that is more fun

[57:54]to listen to and more disappointing to see live

[57:57]than Neil Diamond?

[57:57]Like, every time I listen to him, I'm like,

[57:59]"Yeah, I fucking love Neil Diamond."

[58:00]Then I see him and I'm like, "Oh."

[58:02]- You've seen him live?

[58:02]- No, but I've seen him like in movies and stuff

[58:04]and like videos.

[58:05]He looks old as shit.

[58:06]Well, here, I'll just show you, okay?

[58:08]- You know, there's one person who actually performed a song,

[58:11]a song live, or a band.

[58:13]It's been you two.

[58:14]I think they've covered "Sweet Caroline"

[58:16]at numerous concerts.

[58:17]- Oh, there we go.

[58:18]I feel like a Neil Diamond show would be good.

[58:21]- Yeah, of course it would be good.

[58:21]He's got a million good songs.

[58:23]But look at this guy.

[58:24]You want to...

[58:25]I mean, look at this.

[58:27]Doesn't he just...

[58:30]- He just looks like a Vegas show person, right?

[58:32]- I mean, I'm in for it.

[58:33]- And everybody in his band is old.

[58:35]This would be such a bummer to go to for me.

[58:38]Well, now, wait a minute, actually.

[58:41]I'm enjoying this.

[58:42]Nevermind.

[58:43]I'm wrong.

[58:43]- It sounded pretty good to me.

[58:44]Let's cancel the podcast and watch Neil Diamond videos.

[58:47]- All right, last song on the list is from 2011.

[58:49]This is "Florence and the Machine."

[58:51]The song is "Shake It Out."

[58:52]- Ooh.

[58:53]- Oh, yeah, listen to that.

[58:57]- Can you hear it?

[58:58]- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[59:00]- I don't think I knew this was "Florence and the Machine."

[59:03]- Oh, "Florence and the Machine" are extremely underrated,

[59:07]at least for my...

[59:07]- They got anthems, right?

[59:09]- So good.

[59:10]- Unbelievable songs, yeah.

[59:11]- I actually read Florence Welch said

[59:13]that Bono taught her how to dance in high heels.

[59:15]They were touring together, and he tore his pants,

[59:17]so he essentially taught her the way to perform on stage

[59:20]without actually really moving.

[59:21]- Well...

[59:24]- Guys are professional.

[59:25]- That was another...

[59:27]- We'll let somebody call in and talk about it.

[59:29]The Richfield dance, we've established that,

[59:32]where you stand in one spot the whole time,

[59:35]and you can essentially just get all...

[59:36]- It's not even a two-step, right?

[59:37]- Nope, just get all the moves out,

[59:39]and it looks like you actually know what you're doing,

[59:41]but your feet never move.

[59:42]- The main key to the Richfield dance

[59:44]is you first get everybody a quadruple shot

[59:46]in a normal-sized cup.

[59:47]- Rumpelmints, preferably.

[59:51]- Yeah, it seems to help all the dancing.

[59:53]Well, if you're going to talk about

[59:55]ripping your pants on concert,

[59:56]you guys remember when I introduced that band in college,

[59:59]and I spent all day preparing for this.

[60:02]So I went out, I introduced the band.

[60:05]I said, "Hey, here comes this band, blah, blah, blah, blah."

[60:07]- Who was the band?

[60:08]None of us remember that. - I don't remember that.

[60:10]- Liars and Saints.

[60:11]- Yeah, Liars and Saints.

[60:12]Of course it was Liars and Saints, okay?

[60:14]On tour now, check them out.

[60:15]So I introduced Liars and Saints,

[60:18]and because the band said,

[60:19]"Hey, Rob, can you come on and introduce us?"

[60:21]I said, "Yeah, come on."

[60:22]So I introduced them, right?

[60:23]Wearing these pants, turn around.

[60:26]I had cut the pants in half.

[60:29]Not the butt cheeks, not any,

[60:30]the whole back of the pants, gone.

[60:32]Just cut them all off. - Impressive.

[60:33]- And had taped the pants to my body

[60:37]using duct tape, including the crotch part.

[60:40]Which I had to have Jenny and Sam help tape

[60:43]in the back before I went on.

[60:44]So I had to walk out, introduce this band,

[60:47]and then turn around, and it's just my full naked butt.

[60:49]So I guess that's another naked story

[60:52]I forgot to tell you guys about.

[60:53]So something to think about.

[60:55]And there's, I have a series of pictures.

[60:56]- It's the first time you've told it on the podcast.

[60:57]- I have a series of pictures.

[60:58]- You're welcome.

[60:59]Listen to me anyway.

[61:00]- I have a series of pictures from it

[61:01]where you see me introducing, and you see me turning,

[61:02]and then you see the crowd going like this, "Ah!"

[61:05]It's like seeing Lincoln get shot.

[61:07]- I do have a vivid memory of that, though.

[61:09]We've talked about this before,

[61:10]but that's one thing I'll never forget.

[61:13]- All right.

[61:14]So now let's get into all the songs we don't know.

[61:16]Russell doesn't know.

[61:16]- Yeah, no!

[61:17]- "Bullet the Blue Sky."

[61:20]- While this song's playing, I was thinking on this album,

[61:24]the first three songs compared to the rest of this,

[61:26]it's like dating.

[61:28]If you start dating someone new,

[61:29]you don't take a fancy trip,

[61:31]you don't go to a fancy restaurant,

[61:34]you don't go to an amazing concert,

[61:35]'cause there's nowhere to go but down from there, right?

[61:38]Like, this album, there's nowhere to go from,

[61:40]it's down.

[61:41]Don't you guys think?

[61:42]Am I wrong?

[61:43]- Yeah, the pacing is terrible.

[61:44]Yeah, they put all of the best ones in the first third.

[61:46]- It's totally true.

[61:47]- Even if things are good from here,

[61:48]it's like, well, you're not gonna top

[61:50]these first three songs?

[61:51]- Gotta split 'em up or something.

[61:54]- Now I'm gonna start giving you guys

[61:55]some of these pretentious facts for the song.

[61:57]For this one, Bono asked Edge to put-

[61:59]- I'll be back in 10 minutes, guys.

[62:01]- Bono asked Edge to put El Salvador through an amplifier.

[62:05]He asked, Bono asked the Edge to put El Salvador

[62:08]through an amplifier.

[62:10]What makes you think?

[62:12]Okay?

[62:13]- What?

[62:14]- Meanwhile, I asked Aaron to put El Salvador

[62:16]through an amplifier, and he did this.

[62:17]- Fuckin' hot sauce.

[62:19]- Okay, that's not funny yet, but it's gonna be,

[62:23]it's gonna be soon.

[62:24]Red Hill Mining Town.

[62:25]Now, you might say, hey, Rob, is this one about

[62:27]one of the most famous strikes in Britain?

[62:30]Yes.

[62:32]- Did we skip Running to a Standstill?

[62:33]- Oh, shoot.

[62:34]- Yeah, we did.

[62:35]- Next up, Running to Standstill, okay,

[62:38]about the heroin epidemic in Dublin.

[62:40]They're always after me, lucky heroin.

[62:44]I kept waiting for these songs, they kept,

[62:46]they would like build towards a chorus,

[62:48]like build towards something, an epic point of the song,

[62:51]and then the epic point of the song never really happened.

[62:54]- Yeah.

[62:54]- Yeah, some of these songs just exist

[62:56]on a certain plane and don't.

[62:57]- And I picked the most exciting parts of these songs.

[63:00]- I don't know which one of these now,

[63:00]I think I've told my story about this album,

[63:03]which is that my first roommate my freshman year

[63:05]would like to go to sleep with music on, and it was,

[63:10]either this album or Jewel, Pieces of You,

[63:13]but his CD player would also start skipping

[63:17]and repeating tracks, so I would wake up

[63:18]in the middle of the night and just hear

[63:20]one of these U2 songs over and over and over again, so.

[63:25]- Can't.

[63:26]- It's also a reason why I would never, ever

[63:27]choose to listen to this album.

[63:29]- And listen, I hate to repeat stories,

[63:30]but you know what my roommate listened to freshman year?

[63:32]♪ Gotta get back in time ♪

[63:36]- Back in time?

[63:38]- Yes.

[63:38]♪ Gotta get back in time ♪

[63:40]- Oh my god.

[63:41]- And you might say to yourself,

[63:41]"Rob, how did you get to the part where he says

[63:43]"you gotta go back in time?"

[63:43]Because he says it 100 times during the song.

[63:45]You can pick any time.

[63:46]Watch, watch this, Russell.

[63:47]I'll just pick this time.

[63:48]Does he say it?

[63:49]Oh, wait.

[63:52]- Sounds like there's a sax solo.

[63:53]- Ooh, that's a nice sax solo, that sounds good.

[63:55]- This is not the one of the greatest of all time, so.

[63:58]- Oh, didn't make the list.

[64:00]- I was gonna say,

[64:03]I was gonna say Aaron's roommate listened to U2,

[64:08]Rob's listened to...

[64:10]- Fuckin' told ya.

[64:10]- Back in time,

[64:12]my roommate was the guy who would turn on the Offspring,

[64:15]blast it as loud as he can and lock the door

[64:17]and let everyone in the dorm listen to it.

[64:19]- Yep.

[64:20]- Matt, did you have a freshman roommate?

[64:21]What was their annoying music they listened to?

[64:24]- I had two freshman roommates.

[64:25]The first one was about 5'2", had blue hair,

[64:30]and was on like 10 pills a day for ADD

[64:32]and all sorts of other stuff.

[64:34]And he was out of there by about November 1st.

[64:37]And then I got a new guy, second semester,

[64:40]you know, so after J term and he was gonna play football,

[64:45]but then he was gone by spring break.

[64:50]And so...

[64:51]- Matt, can I just say this?

[64:53]And I wanna talk seriously for a second about,

[64:56]you know, going to college and stuff.

[64:57]If I hadn't had a roommate my freshman year,

[64:59]I would have died from masturbating too much.

[65:02]I would not have done anything else.

[65:03]I would have come out every day

[65:06]and just been totally desiccated.

[65:07]I would have looked like an old tree.

[65:09]- Well, I'm still here.

[65:10]- Get this guy some water.

[65:11]- I didn't die.

[65:12]- You know, they fucking show those guys

[65:13]from like China and they're like,

[65:14]"This guy's fucking 300 years old."

[65:15]That would have been me.

[65:17]- Rob, you having a lock on that door,

[65:18]like here in the creaky steps of the dorm room

[65:20]would just been a bigger trauma, right?

[65:22]Knowing that no one could get in.

[65:23]- Oh, can you imagine?

[65:24]I mean, going back to the days, it's like,

[65:25]"All right, I'm gonna jack off to the CRT monitor."

[65:27]I mean, it was so big, I took up most of my desk.

[65:29]Rough stuff.

[65:31]Everybody walking by, I smell like mulch over here.

[65:34]Makes no sense.

[65:35]- Oh, God.

[65:37]- Now, you might say, "Hey, Rob, is this next song

[65:39]"about the biggest strike ever in the UK?"

[65:41]And the answer is yes.

[65:42]Red Hill Mining Town.

[65:44]- I thought this album was about the United States.

[65:47]- No, it's about El Salvador.

[65:50]- I'll tell you what, this is an album

[65:51]where if you do research on it, it's infuriating.

[65:54]Because I think, again, I think he's just a guy

[65:55]who says whatever he's thinking at the time.

[65:58]He's like, "Oh yeah, the song's about this, the song."

[66:00]He goes to El Salvador, he's like,

[66:01]"Oh, the song's about that.

[66:02]"The song's about Ethiopia, whatever."

[66:07]This is the point in the album where it's like,

[66:08]"It's fine to leave it on and just ignore it."

[66:10]But no, I don't know.

[66:11]I didn't know these songs were about anything.

[66:13]- Or do a podcast about it.

[66:15]That's fine, too.

[66:16]It's not a waste of time.

[66:17]- Or turn it on and do a podcast.

[66:19]- Jack off or whatever.

[66:20]- What really drives me crazy about this album

[66:21]is I feel these songs are not produced very well.

[66:24]I don't think the voice is clear.

[66:25]I don't think the guitar is clear.

[66:26]I don't think it sounds very good.

[66:28]I don't like the way Brian Eno produced record sound.

[66:31]- Wow, so if Brian Eno was a guest on this podcast,

[66:33]you would say, "Brian Eno, I don't think you did

[66:35]"a good job on Joshua Tree."

[66:36]- I'd say it right to his face after I was done explaining

[66:38]why "Hot Sauce on Feet" is so funny.

[66:40]- That would be--

[66:41]- The only thing I read was that Eno was into the Smiths

[66:45]and then "My Bloody Valentine" at the time.

[66:47]And I can totally hear where he's getting to this,

[66:50]like, again, the shoegaze type,

[66:53]just like nothing makes sense.

[66:54]We're just kind of blending it all together.

[66:56]So, you know, I don't know.

[66:58]- This really sucks that I do all this work

[67:00]and then Matt's one piece of research is better

[67:02]than every other piece of research I've done

[67:03]for this album, period, total.

[67:05]- You did all your research?

[67:06]- Matt's got some smart shit.

[67:07]- This is from Bono.

[67:07]Bono sucks.

[67:08]- Yeah, it's true.

[67:09]God, you're good, man.

[67:10]"In God's Country," they didn't like this one,

[67:12]but they were like, "We need an up-tempo song."

[67:15]This one felt like the most similar vibe to the first three.

[67:18]It's not as good, clearly, but--

[67:20]- I appreciate that they wrote a song about their time

[67:25]hanging out in Richfield, Minnesota, you know,

[67:27]"In God's Country," but, you know, I don't know.

[67:30]It might be a little pretentious.

[67:31]- Bono, no, man, I don't want him

[67:36]to make your pretentious meter go off,

[67:37]but Bono said he didn't know if the song

[67:39]was about Ireland or the United States,

[67:41]but eventually dedicated that song to the world,

[67:45]to the Statue of Liberty.

[67:48]- What a--

[67:49]Oh, my God.

[67:50]- Can I say to you, Bono,

[67:53]for dedicating a song that nobody remembers off an album

[67:58]that turns out not to be maybe their best,

[67:59]it's actually just three good songs.

[68:01]- Rob, I'm holding up a torch, like the statue,

[68:04]like you're coming to Ellis Island to see me.

[68:05]Do you think, do you think if like Ireland

[68:08]or Northern Ireland or whatever would have said like,

[68:10]this is the greatest song ever, this is our national,

[68:13]do you think he would have ever said,

[68:14]I'm not sure if it's Ireland or America or anything?

[68:18]Oh, I definitely wrote that.

[68:19]This, this, I was thinking about the motherland,

[68:21]you know, that kind of, God, it's just terrific.

[68:25]- Bono, America loves you, and because of that,

[68:28]we've brought you these Freedom Fries.

[68:31]- This podcast.

[68:32]- All right, I knew that sound clip was gonna come in handy

[68:35]when I put it out about six weeks ago.

[68:37]Next up, "Trip Through Your Wires".

[68:41]This was actually supposed to be,

[68:44]instead of this song,

[68:45]it was supposed to be the sweetest thing on the album.

[68:47]And instead they put this one.

[68:50]- This is my fourth favorite song on the album.

[68:51]This was the best, best song on the back half.

[68:53]- Sounds like Nico Case.

[68:54]- Can you believe that "Sweetest Thing"

[68:57]wasn't even released on an album?

[68:59]There's the B side of the "Where the Streets Have No Name"

[69:01]single, that's crazy, right?

[69:03]- It's that old, I didn't know "Sweetest Thing" was that old.

[69:05]It's better than most of the songs.

[69:06]- They left "Sweetest Thing" off for "Red Hill Mining Town"

[69:08]and "Running to Stand Still" and "Indiana's Country".

[69:11]- Oh, you mean the song about the biggest strike

[69:12]in UK history, Aaron?

[69:14]Yes.

[69:15]"Rule of Threes" makes Aaron laugh.

[69:17]- You're trying to turn me into an anti-labor person here.

[69:19]I'm not gonna do it.

[69:21]- I think Bono was actually playing the harmonica on that,

[69:23]and there was a number of groups,

[69:25]they actually went on tour, I don't know,

[69:26]did you guys go to the Joshua Tree tour back in 2017,

[69:31]a few years back?

[69:31]Didn't they play at US Bank Stadium?

[69:34]Did you guys go to that or not?

[69:35]- I did not.

[69:36]- Did they play at US Bank or did they play at The Bank?

[69:38]I forget.

[69:39]- I think either one of them, US,

[69:40]I thought they played at the Viking Stadium in 2017,

[69:43]but there were a number of bands that went on tour with them

[69:46]on that Joshua Tree tour, Mumford & Sons, The Lumineers,

[69:50]one of the Gallagher brothers,

[69:51]and then Beck actually opened for seven shows,

[69:54]including at US Bank Stadium.

[69:56]- Oh, shit.

[69:57]- And at all those concerts, he played the harmonica,

[70:01]so while Bono was playing the harmonica,

[70:02]I think Beck also played the harmonica,

[70:04]at US Bank Stadium at the Joshua Tree tours.

[70:07]This song is called "One Foot in the Grave", check it out.

[70:10]You wanted to jump like to something probably.

[70:22]- No, this is good.

[70:23]- All right.

[70:26]Point is, when it comes to playing the harmonica

[70:33]on the Joshua Tree tour,

[70:34]at the US Bank Stadium, who did it better?

[70:37]- You know.

[70:38]- Beck did it better.

[70:39]I'm gonna jam a little bit here.

[70:41]- Did we get a triangle in there or not?

[70:46]- Oh, you know what I just deleted last week?

[70:48]- What?

[70:49]- There's an old hobo on the patio in an old barbed wire.

[70:53]- I just deleted the longest harmonica note ever held.

[70:56]I just deleted that sound clip.

[70:57]I was like, "We'll never need that again, ever."

[70:59]And then you do a harmonica bit.

[71:01]Dang it.

[71:02]What a bummer.

[71:03]- Failed.

[71:04]- Yeah, you know, Russell, I did go to,

[71:06]I actually did see that U2 concert,

[71:09]but I sat up top, so I couldn't really,

[71:12]couldn't really pick out any of the songs.

[71:15]- Oh, that's not nice.

[71:17]- Too soon, too soon.

[71:20]- That's a good bit.

[71:22]All right.

[71:24]Now, next up is from a TV show

[71:26]that I'm sure Aaron's watched, "One Tree Hill".

[71:28]- "One Tree Hill".

[71:30]- Did they use this in the TV show?

[71:32]- I don't think so.

[71:33]"One Tree Hill" was about,

[71:34]this place in New Zealand,

[71:35]and this was all about their roadie from New Zealand

[71:38]who died in a motorcycle crash before making this album.

[71:41]- Oh, no, I feel sad just making fun of this song.

[71:45]- You never feel sad when he talks about the macho man

[71:48]running into that telephone, Aaron.

[71:49]- Oh, no.

[71:50]- Wait, no.

[71:50]- You've never once mentioned,

[71:52]expressed any regret on that one.

[71:53]- Wait, really, I haven't?

[71:55]- No.

[71:56]- Ha.

[71:56]- You laugh every time Rob does that.

[71:58]- Wait a minute.

[71:58]- I'm done laughing.

[71:59]- Craig Carroll, wait a minute.

[72:00]I know you gotta get to that U2 show

[72:03]and you're gonna speed off.

[72:04]Real quick on your motorcycle,

[72:06]but let me just tell you,

[72:07]I've been having heart problems.

[72:09]- Oh, boy.

[72:10]Running out of gas.

[72:11]Real quick on that one.

[72:12]- Actually, Aaron's not laughing at this one anymore, Rob.

[72:14]We might have outplayed this one.

[72:15]- Yeah, yeah, going too far.

[72:18]- It's almost like we went to the mine one too often,

[72:21]and then we found out the British government had closed it,

[72:23]leading to the biggest strike in UK history.

[72:26]- You know they allegedly recorded 30 songs for this album

[72:30]and cut it down to 11?

[72:31]- Yeah.

[72:33]- Did they all just start like,

[72:34]- I don't know.

[72:34]- They all sounded like this.

[72:35]- I don't know.

[72:36]- They all sounded like this.

[72:37]You know they all sounded like this.

[72:39]'Cause they keep saying like,

[72:39]oh yeah, this song came from a jam.

[72:41]So I can imagine recording with these guys

[72:43]by their fifth album.

[72:44]They were just jamming all day and they'd be like,

[72:47]and then listening back to them,

[72:48]I mean, it's, being like, yeah, this is good enough.

[72:51]Let's put it on.

[72:52]30 songs.

[72:52]- I think like, yes,

[72:53]like they were just smelling their own farts, right?

[72:54]Just like, oh, this is great.

[72:57]- Farting in pillows and whatever they're doing.

[73:00]- Yeah, getting pink eye.

[73:00]♪ Some people like sex that is gay ♪

[73:03]♪ And fools ♪

[73:04]- Guys, I'm looking for a running joke so bad.

[73:06]♪ Like a game ♪

[73:07]♪ Some are boiling up rubber jeans ♪

[73:10]- We've gotten out of breath, it's so hard.

[73:12]Doing a show is so hard.

[73:14]Next up, "Exit."

[73:15]♪ Stars shining, shining bright ♪

[73:17]- It's about breaking up with a clown if your ex is it.

[73:20]You guys know what I'm talking about.

[73:21]- What?

[73:22]- No.

[73:23]- This is just.

[73:23]- This is about a serial killer,

[73:25]but more importantly, it was a long jam

[73:27]and this was just one section of it, so.

[73:29]- I don't think I got this far.

[73:32]I mean, I'm gonna be honest.

[73:33]I don't think I listened to this whole album.

[73:36]- No.

[73:36]I think probably the most important thing

[73:38]with creating an album,

[73:39]we always talk about where do you put the songs.

[73:42]If you can have a song that's about mothers in Argentina

[73:46]whose kids were taken away by the government

[73:47]and never seen again,

[73:48]I think that's how you get an album.

[73:50]What a banger.

[73:51]Mothers of the Disappeared, give it up.

[73:53]- This might be the worst final song on an album

[74:02]we've ever listened to.

[74:03]- Yeah.

[74:04]- Right?

[74:05]- I'm just thinking.

[74:06]- I don't understand.

[74:07]I just don't, yeah, I don't get it.

[74:08]- I'm just thinking about those kids

[74:08]and they still haven't found their,

[74:09]where their bodies are.

[74:10]- God, what a fucking dump.

[74:11]- And you might think, hey, Rob,

[74:12]did you go on a deep dive today

[74:13]about the Madres de Plaza de Mayo?

[74:13]I sure did.

[74:14]And I would not recommend it.

[74:15]It's a bummer.

[74:16]- What's the song that did,

[74:17]what's the song that this beat out,

[74:18]this beat out?

[74:19]What's the one that never didn't make the album?

[74:20]- Sweetest Thing.

[74:21]- Sweetest Thing.

[74:21]It's crazy.

[74:22]- Sweetest Thing.

[74:23]- Yeah.

[74:24]- Sweetest Thing.

[74:25]- Yeah.

[74:26]- That, that, that, the Sweetest Thing got knocked off.

[74:28]- Yeah.

[74:29]- In this one.

[74:30]- I mean, you want to give the guy props.

[74:31]- Rolling Jerome, right?

[74:31]- 'Cause he, you know, cares about the world, right?

[74:33]I mean, I think.

[74:34]- Yeah, but he, do, I mean, do they?

[74:36]- Oh.

[74:37]- Oh boy.

[74:38]Listen, let's get into the rating system.

[74:55]- The favorite part of the show.

[74:57]- The passionate.

[74:57]- And very popular.

[74:59]- Beck did it better.

[75:01]- Rating system.

[75:01]- Rating system.

[75:02]- Oh yeah.

[75:03]- All right, so listen, this rating system,

[75:08]we are talking about the real 135, okay?

[75:10]A lot of people texted me last time and said,

[75:12]"Oh, that wasn't 135."

[75:14]Nope, didn't get a single text about that actually.

[75:17]- Zero.

[75:18]- This is, we have to rate this on a scale, of course.

[75:20]Is this the 135th best album of all time?

[75:22]Okay, it's not as good as Octoon Baby.

[75:25]It's not as good as some of these other albums

[75:27]we've covered that I've forgotten, all of them actually.

[75:29]Sometimes when I go back and listen,

[75:30]I'm shocked that there's an album I've heard.

[75:33]Is this kind of like Tambourine, right?

[75:36]Listen, if a song has no tambourine, guess what?

[75:40]That is absolutely no good.

[75:42]That would mean this album should be lower on the list

[75:45]or a higher number.

[75:45]That would be a real groan, okay?

[75:48]If this has just a little bit of tambourine, okay?

[75:51]Just enough to get that beat moving.

[75:53]Just a little tasty taste.

[75:54]Oh, just give me that.

[75:55]Give me that little taste of the tambourine.

[75:56]- A little bit of movement.

[75:57]- Okay, a drum in the middle, bells around the outside.

[75:59]God, that sounds like awesome.

[76:00]- Oh, fucking tambourine.

[76:01]- Perfect.

[76:02]All right, Aaron.

[76:02]Aaron, did you just do that?

[76:05]- Oh, the tambourine.

[76:07]Just play it.

[76:08]Oh.

[76:09]- What are we doing?

[76:11]- Oh, just play some more tambourine.

[76:12]- Oh, this sucks.

[76:15]- He wore me down.

[76:18]He wore me down.

[76:19]I just, I had to embrace him.

[76:21]He did it.

[76:22]You did it, Rob.

[76:23]You drug me down into your, to your level.

[76:25]- So easy.

[76:26]- So easy.

[76:26]- I need this hot sauce feet.

[76:30]- Oh.

[76:31]- Burn your fucking tongue.

[76:32]- Oh, God.

[76:33]You did it, Rob.

[76:36]You made this our third hot sauce feet episode.

[76:39]- Don't get me started about ovipositors.

[76:42]So here's the deal.

[76:42]That would be rolling well-toned,

[76:44]or if it's the band I tried to come up with earlier,

[76:47]where it's only tambourines, okay?

[76:49]That, guess what?

[76:50]That is too much tambourine.

[76:51]That is rolling bone.

[76:53]Should be higher on the list.

[76:54]Uh-oh, kind of lost track of the,

[76:56]kind of lost track of what I was saying there.

[76:58]Be higher on the list, a lower number.

[76:59]Everybody would love a band that's just tambourines.

[77:01]It would probably be everybody's favorite.

[77:03]I mean, hey guys, hey guys, we're tambourine.

[77:06]We're going to open with Little Red Mining Town.

[77:08]This is Rob and the Tambourines.

[77:11]Stop talking, more tambourine.

[77:13]That's what somebody would say from the background.

[77:15]What do you think?

[77:16]Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan?

[77:18]Lost the thread there a little bit,

[77:19]but I came back strong at the end, so.

[77:20]And I definitely didn't kill the funny joke we had

[77:23]with the non-funny ending. Aaron, what do you think?

[77:24]Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling groan?

[77:27]Joshua Tree, 1987.

[77:31]First three songs are great.

[77:32]I can't listen to the rest.

[77:33]It just doesn't hold my attention.

[77:35]Rolling groan.

[77:37]Russell, rolling well-toned, rolling bone,

[77:38]or rolling groan?

[77:40]I would echo what Aaron said.

[77:42]I thought the first three were fantastic.

[77:44]I think it's hard to live up to something

[77:45]when you throw out three great songs like that.

[77:47]And for me, I mentioned it earlier.

[77:50]I felt like all these songs were building to something

[77:51]and then they just never paid off with like the big chorus.

[77:54]Or the big rousing excitement at the end.

[77:57]So, you know, I think this might've been rolling well-toned

[78:01]if Actoon Baby hadn't happened yet.

[78:03]If we had only gotten one YouTube album

[78:05]in the last however many, 20 weeks or something,

[78:07]and there was one of them there,

[78:09]I think I would've been good with it.

[78:10]But I think having two of them,

[78:12]it just got a little bit much for me.

[78:14]But I will say, I think if I'm gonna just compare

[78:16]the top three songs, you have "Mysterious Ways,"

[78:19]one, and "Wild Horses" from the other one.

[78:22]I still haven't found what I'm looking for with or without you.

[78:24]Or "Where The Streets Have No Name."

[78:26]I think I'm gonna take the other one.

[78:27]I'm gonna take the one with "One."

[78:29]I think "One" is the best song of them all.

[78:31]So I'm gonna take Actoon Baby as "Should Be Higher."

[78:34]I'm gonna say this is a little bit "Rolling Grown"

[78:36]'cause I don't need two U2 albums this high on the list.

[78:39]- Ant, big mystery what you're gonna say,

[78:41]rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling grown?

[78:43]What do you think?

[78:44]- Well, I forgot to mention, and I'll just ask,

[78:48]am I the only one who's listened to the Joshua Tree

[78:51]while driving through Joshua Tree National Park?

[78:54]- Yes.

[78:55]- That sounds awesome.

[78:55]- Wow, that sounds...

[78:56]- Have you done that, Rosie?

[78:58]- No, we didn't make it to Joshua Tree.

[78:59]We were down there last spring, it was too hot.

[79:01]So we didn't make it to Joshua Tree.

[79:02]- Megan and Ben have a place out in Palm Springs.

[79:06]Yeah, down Palm Springs there.

[79:07]And we went to the Joshua Tree, Sarah and I,

[79:09]and Megan and Ben, and Ben was smart enough

[79:13]to put on this album and listen to it.

[79:15]So we still couldn't find the tree, though.

[79:17]I don't know, we drove all around that park

[79:19]and we couldn't find the tree.

[79:20]- Well, he goes by Josh, that's the thing.

[79:22]He's more casual now. - He goes by Josh.

[79:24]- Yeah.

[79:24]- Probably.

[79:25]- Yeah, look, I'll admit that the first three songs

[79:28]are bangers, right?

[79:31]They're great songs. - Bang, bang.

[79:33]- When you think of the late '80s and U2,

[79:36]that's what you think of, right?

[79:37]So yeah, 100% great songs,

[79:39]but my fucking God, David and Bono,

[79:43]they're all over the goddamn place with this whole thing.

[79:46]And then you're reading like they couldn't,

[79:48]and again, we're trying not to be negative, right?

[79:50]But you read the Wikipedia thing and it says like,

[79:53]they're doing albums and all these live aids and all this,

[79:56]and they're trying to finish the album.

[79:58]And Brian Eno had other commitments,

[80:00]so he didn't even finish the album.

[80:01]So they brought in their old producer and all this stuff.

[80:04]And so it's like--

[80:05]- I was gonna say that too, by the way.

[80:06]- You know, it's like, holy cow,

[80:08]like how is this that high up there?

[80:09]And again, if it wasn't for the great songs,

[80:12]you know, like this album would not be this high up there,

[80:15]you know, but it's got great songs.

[80:17]It's not a great album by any means.

[80:19]- Matt put songs in air quotes there.

[80:20]So I'm not sure what he meant,

[80:21]'cause he said great songs, so it's great songs.

[80:23]- So this list is for the greatest albums, right?

[80:25]- It's true.

[80:26]- And we've talked about all the time.

[80:27]We've got albums here that have one or two great songs.

[80:30]And so, yeah,

[80:31]if you're talking about the 500 greatest songs of all time,

[80:34]well, yeah, those songs should be on it,

[80:36]but for the album's sake, no.

[80:37]- Now I know how the professor,

[80:40]now I know how the professor in Goodwill Hunting feels.

[80:42]When I'm like, oh, excuse me, sir, you're actually wrong.

[80:44]And then it turns out I'm wrong.

[80:45]I feel like a piece of shit.

[80:46]I feel sorry for that guy.

[80:47]- Do you know how fucking easy this shit is for me?

[80:53]That's on the board.

[80:54]Nobody's ever listened to it before, and then I did.

[80:56]Listen, unfortunately, guys, this is incorrect.

[80:58]This gets a rolling ire loaned.

[81:00]- No way.

[81:01]- A rolling ire loaned, yeah.

[81:03]This album is so much like the classic,

[81:06]like, if you think about the Irish experience

[81:08]as a culture, right?

[81:10]They come to America, they're learning new things.

[81:12]They're talking about the majesty, the wide open spaces,

[81:16]the new things they can do, the ever-present growth.

[81:18]- Room to make big mistakes.

[81:19]- And it all happened because of one little

[81:23]problem with the potato.

[81:24]I mean, it's amazing how much these little things

[81:26]change history, and I can relate so much

[81:29]because I recently ran out of bagged Ore-Ida fries

[81:32]in my freezer, and I might move.

[81:34]I might leave my family.

[81:36]All right, listen.

[81:37]By the way, things are going fine.

[81:41]Next up, you know that George Clinton song you like?

[81:45]No, not that one.

[81:46]- Yeah.

[81:47]- Not that one.

[81:48]Nope, nope.

[81:49]- Back in our minds.

[81:50]- Nope, it's "Baggot Brain."

[81:50]- Back in our minds again.

[81:51]- I'm psychedelic.

[81:52]- Yes.

[81:53]♪ I want to hear about the greatest albums of all time ♪

[81:58]♪ But you're just too lazy to look it up online ♪

[81:59]♪ But you're just too lazy to look it up online ♪

[82:03]♪ If you want to hear four guys who chat ♪

[82:05]♪ And then they get off track ♪

[82:09]♪ I've got the perfect podcast for you, Jack ♪

[82:13]- Beck did it better.

[82:15]- Oh, God damn it.

[82:18]We don't even have a joke to end with.

[82:19]- I got nothing.

[82:20]- Fuck me.

[82:21]- Oh, couldn't you just play some tambourine

[82:22]to finish this out?

[82:23]- Just to bring it back.

[82:25]Just to bring it closer, play some tambourine.

[82:27]- Thank God.

[82:28]- Oh, yeah.

[82:29]♪ Hot sauce feet ♪

[82:30]- Thank God.

[82:30]- Oh, yeah.

[82:31]- That's it.

[82:32]That's the last time I ever joined in on the hot sauce feet.

[82:35]- Terrible podcast with no jokes at the end.

[82:39]- Oh, yeah.

[82:41]- This is insane.

[82:42]- Oh, wait, I got to close all these tabs down.

[82:44]This is going crazy.

[82:45]I got all these tabs.

[82:46]- Oh, no.

[82:47]- It's like the oyster incident.

[82:50]- Oyster incident?

[82:53]- Yeah, it's like this album starts out great,

[82:55]just ends on a flop.

[82:58]- The whimper just ends flaccid.

[82:59]♪ Goodbye ♪

[83:02]- No movement at all.

[83:03]- I think I might go cover my dick in pudding.

[83:07]That actually sounds fun.

[83:08]- Same.