Kraftwerk: Trans-Europe Express (1977)

[0:00]Can you write down this idea for me? Give it to me later. Nutflix. Nutflix. Hear me out. It would be like a site where, I don't know, maybe adult movies are categorized. I cannot believe that there's not already a site like this. Maybe you should check, Rob. Let's see. It's just like an old man drying off his balls while eating a bunch of types of nuts in the gym. Hey, hand me those cashews, dude. Nutflix is spelled like Nutflix. Like somebody's flicking your nuts, Just a little bit. Reddit says, a bold new monthly subscription. I think I've told you guys this. Have I told you that the complimentary movie guys are guys that are tally-whacked guys in the nuts? They'll hit each other in the nuts on purpose. Still? In our 40s? I would lose my shit. Yeah, Russell, they know better than to do that to Russell. I would lose my shit. Yeah, that's not it, Russell.

[1:00]Plus, your nuts are so big, Russell. That's something everybody knows about you. That's a common. That's just something we say and everybody knows. Russell, big nuts. Big nuts. On Nutflix now. Tell me you get a Nutflix live. Big balls in Cowtown. What song are we going to play first? Parody song? Can I just tell you? Let's play the Dazed and Confused. Aaron. Whatever the first song is. I know what you're saying, Aaron. That I'm not going to have a parody song. Okay? I heard that tone of your voice. I was asking. Rude. Rude. Okay? You don't have it again? It's a tough one. Did I work especially hard on this parody song? No. Okay? But I still worked on it. I'm impressed. All right? You are going to hear this. This is going to be our number one Sprechensy Deutsch podcast. Okay? You're going to hear some of my German. Of course, I am famous on family vacations for being a fun guy. Okay? I'm not just angry dad all the time. Okay? I am also a fun guy. Get fun food. Mushrooms. Bacon jokes. Boss. Well.

[2:00]Here's the thing. When I'm in Germany, I just say words that sound like German. Oh, they love that. Okay? Like, let's say I'm crossing the street. Walking across the street. It makes sense. Aaron, what else would I be doing in Germany? You'd be essen. No, you tell me in English. See, you suck at it. You tell me in English and I'll translate. You'd be eating sausage. Oh. Oh, yeah. Chomping schnitzel. See, I mean what I'm talking about. You know what I'm talking about. You know what I'm talking about. You know what I'm talking about. In 2020, four friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums as decided By Rolling Stone Magazine. This resulted in a text chain that celebrated the music, excoriated the order, and led us To making this podcast. We are far from experts. We promise to do almost no research. All opinions are our own unless you disagree. Please sit back and enjoy. Beck did it better. This week, we are up to album 287. And from 1977, we've got Kraftwerk. Or as they say online, what? 287? 238. Rob, if you could please get it right in the written records, that would be great.

[3:00]247? Hey, who's ever making our wiki and hasn't quite posted it online yet, just to let you Know, this is 238, okay? So please get it correct. And we have from 1977, we have Kraftwerk. Kraftwerk. With Trans Europa Express. Well, I got on the Trans Europa Local. It's making so many stops. I mean it's... Sounds nice, Rob. But let's what? Now that we're on the, now that we're on the training, Sitting in a car and caboosing or whatever. A cafe car and eating and training. I mean, guys, the, I, Duolingo, thank you. I actually did do German on Duolingo for a while. It could be nine poem. If I ever need to say I'm an apple, now I know how to do it. We're on the train. Unfortunately, we've all got on the Trans Siberian Express. It's a totally different band. All right, we got to get back on the Trans Europa Express. I grabbed the wrong ticket. But let's go over and turn on the radio and see what could possibly play for a German, Elektronica band.

[4:00]And guess what? Aaron, actually, it doesn't matter because this is, This episode is going to get about two downloads. I can just tell you that right now. I'm not worried about how this does. You know, we're getting old when Matt has to put on his readers to Hold his bishop when he's playing 4D chess. Can you imagine? Can you? I just actually, Russell, that's a great point. That's a great point. You know what I'm going to do? I think I'm going to do this as soon as the school year is done And I have some time on my hands. I'm going to masturbate and, I'm going to look at it. You know what I mean? I'm going to look at it at the same time. I'm just going to be dialed in. That's going to be tough. That's going to be tough because I guess I'm going to bet I don't like what I see. You know what I mean? That's a good bet. I bet there's a lot going on down there. Like the sandworm from Star Wars. I mean, I, listen, I, I would guess it doesn't look great. Well, I guess there's the. We're not doing that topic again. We can't do that topic more times than. So here's the deal.

[5:00]Let's turn on the radio. Let's see what's on. Here we go. Has your wife ever texted friends about something you've done? You think. I think she texted somebody when they found that box of Boston baked beans in the bed. I think that was a text to somebody. That's about it. Otherwise, no. Because I'm perfect. Divorce lawyer. Oh, wait a minute. Why am I on this text chain? All right. Wait, why is that guy from the gym called the divorce lawyer? God, I almost texted the chain with my girlfriend on it. That was close. I thought you were cheating. This is way worse. Yeah, this is. Hey, well Russell, that's the thing. One out of three Americans cheat. Is it? So, yeah. Well, I'm not sure if it's my wife or my girlfriend, but I'm keeping my eyes on. I mean, all right, let's turn on the radio. What's that? What is cheating anyway? Yeah. I would. I also say anytime I always know that something bad is happening when I'm like, oh, I wouldn't

[6:00]Tell my wife about this. That's when I know that something has gone. When was the last time that happened? Yeah. Hmm. Well, pretty much. She's not listening. Pretty much every day at work for the last year. Like I started telling her a story about work the other day and I was like, oh, what am I doing? She doesn't care. I don't care. Nobody cares about this. Listen, let's turn on the radio. Listen, let's turn on the radio. I did it better.

[7:00]Wow. If you want to hear about the greatest albums of all time. That was impressive, Rob. That was my intro written in German because I know we have more international fans. I get it. If you want to hear more guys who chat and then they get off. I don't know. Put this one on the back end too. I've got a perfect podcast for you. I mean, it's impressive, Rob. I did it better. Listen, it's the most erudite. Well, you like that one of the theme song. Oh, well, thank you. It's very good. And if you ever want to say excreta, the order in German, just listen to that back. You know, you'll know how to say it. It's a very important phrase. Now I've got three guys here. Okay. Who want to listen to craft work? Well, mistress crushes their balls like they deserve because they're a little shrine in God. Oh, hey, twisted mine scrotum. Right in the dresser drawer. I don't know what it is about thinking about some German woman stepping on my dresser. My balls like ping pong balls under a little heel, but it makes this album make a lot of

[8:00]Sense to me. I'll tell you that right now. All of us. What do you, let's say you had an hour with the dominators, right? What would you do? Do you think? Probably have her put me in like demolitions, finish your move. Like I'd have her bend me over her back and have another one come flying off the middle Rope, not the top rope. Cause they're too big for that off the middle rope with the elbow, the we'll call it like Something like the demolition. Device or something. So it'd actually be a two on one handicap match, Rob. Oh, wow. That's wow. That's I, here's the, I would be like, Hey, do you know, earthquakes finish And move, but speaking of earthquake, but before we get to what Aaron would do with The dominatrix, yes, I was at a record store last week and there was a band called earthquake. Like it was written on one of the things and I went to look, just hoping it would just Be like big John Tenta. And like the only song was the rumble song.

[9:00]You know what I'm talking about? Is that his earthquake theme song? Is that his entrance music? I think we've played it here before. I know we have played it before. It's so sad. And there's no way we, again, I'm just going to say it. I'm just going to say it again. Earthquake was a wrestler. You knew was going to die very soon. None of it. He did not look like love guys with just one tattoo. Look at that. Just a single tattoo of a tiger. That's baller. It looks a lot like your tattoo, except for it doesn't have, it's true. It doesn't have writing under it. To be clear, I was not being sarcastic. I love the single tattoo. Like I think that's a super cool move. Wow. I what my problem is, Aaron? I told you what I'm going to get for a tattoo. My kids, two names and one of them is slightly smaller. See, that's the problem. To me, it's funny right now. The future Rob, not funny, actually pretty psychologically damaging to my kids. Speaking of demolition in S and M, I did see that they are going to, To be at a local wrestling event up in like an hour North of here at one of

[10:00]The casinos in Wisconsin. I might have to go. You kind of got to go. Sure. John from John for me. How often do you get a chance to live out your S and M fantasy? I mean, can you imagine like you just see two guys unloading shoulder pads From the trunks of their car out in the parking lot? And you're like, that's them. I think that's them. I'm not sure. I can't tell. Technically that's Legion of doom. Oh, these guys just wore like the straps, Like the belts. With spikes all over him. It was very like now thinking back, it's like, Oh, it was fully S and M garb. I would say a lot of wrestling is pretty erotic. True. Okay. I was helping clean up my mom's house the other week. My nephew didn't want to keep some of these old wrestling figures. And I kept three of them. Two were the S and M demolition action figures. I would not going to let them be thrown away. That's a PC. Oh yeah. That's a personal collection. Russell. You don't know. It's a PC buddy. Is it, why is their skin orange?

[11:00]Show me again. Or is that just the zoo with little tan? And they do. Yeah. They've been doing that. I would say that's orange. That's big time. Orange. You know, I do think about my kids listening to this podcast, like after I passed and being Like, Oh my God. And I just think about that as being like my what people are going to remember By Aaron, what would you have a dominators do if you had an hour with them? I would have a ton of questions, right? I would want to know what's the most, right? Like, wouldn't you want to be like, what's the most boring? With you and your father tell me about it. Oh my God. Sure. You guys wouldn't want to get like spanked once. I would be like, Hey, just spank me once. Well, why not? Just if I had an hour, like, Hey, can I just take a nap over here? Just you read a book or something. Let's just both. That's just chill. We could both use an hour off. But this is a professional spanker. You don't want to see what one spank from somebody who's like, listen, I've never been Spanked by a professional. It's been only amateurs. It's been only amateurs in my life. I think pretty much.

[12:00]Okay. It's like power. So what, what constitutes their professionalism, Rob? Like, do they go get a degree in dominatrix? I mean, like, do they, are they certified? Do they work on like the angle of the slap of your ass? Like, and you know, spread your fingers just a little bit I'm assuming they're Going to like a conference and there's different workshops and like one is Like paddles cat or nine tails. Should there be 10? You're like, I don't know. I don't know which one I wanted to go to both of these. That's such a bummer. Maybe I can have them send me the PowerPoint from it. You know what I mean? Crush me nuts. And you're like, Oh God, I wanted to go that way too. I think we should take, all of the money from that we make up this podcast And send you to one of those, conferences just to report back on it. Well what of course, what kind of dominatrix is my all time favorite Dominatrix. It's the funniest one is the fin doming. I've talked to you guys about fin doming before, haven't I? Let's have a refresh. Many times. Many times. Yeah. Fin doming. Fin doming.

[13:00]Of course. No, what is it, Rob? Please tell us what it is. It is, of course, men who I think it is erotic to be forced to spend all their money on women. So women's, there's a bunch of women's Twitters. If you type in hashtag fin dom, where it just says, who's going to buy me lunch? You sick pigs. Like, and you're just like, Oh God, that is kind of hot. I do like that. Let's see. Hashtag sounds a lot like my life. You think you're getting fin domed right now, Rob? Russell? If I had an hour with the dominatrix, I would say, Hey, you should try a gag where you become A dominate Twix and then you force feed people candy bars. Oh my God. Can you imagine? Yes. Peanut butter Twix. That's just a good business idea. Oh my God. You brought peanut butter Twix king size. I can't possibly eat all four. That's good. I can. I would trick her. It'd be a reverse dominatrix. She'd be like, this guy can't possibly eat any more candy bars, but I am. Let's see. Rob, if I was with someone and we went to a gas station, And they bought a single or like a regular Twix,

[14:00]I would be offended by it. Those are so good. You have to, if you have to get the, the bigger one, You can't just do the little one. Of course you need two or bars. You have to have four. You know, the only problem with this, You're looking at the Wikipedia for financial domination, right? And it's going into your fin dom thing or whatever. The only problem with this is, Is somehow fin dom makes it onto Wikipedia, But the Iowa double down. It's outrageous. I mean, it's outrageous. They have no standards. My son now just taunts me by saying Iowa double down. He doesn't know exactly. He's like, he'll be supposed to be in bed and he'll come out and be like, Hey dad, Iowa double down. You know the, That class where I had him say Iowa sucks to you in the video, They keep saying that as a punchline now, just randomly. Okay. I know what you're thinking. Middle schoolers taking one joke too far. That's crazy. Yeah. In the financial domination lifestyle, A practice of dominance and submission, financial submission. And here's what they call it. Cash piggy, fin sub, human ATM, Pay pig. Okay.

[15:00]So I, I think the idea that I would be a cash piggy, Just handing money over to some woman to feel good. Actually, That literally is like parenting. That's exactly what my kids are. I am kind of a cash. My kids are kind of cash piggies for me. Listen, I've got three guys here. Listen, Wait, where am I? Oh, I just got GPT. Yes. I would double down is often used as a slang or joke term. They have a few meanings depending down, Doubling down on a bad hand. For example, Doubling down on something like a hard 12, Which is generally a bad idea. Bullshit. You're making that up. Take a picture, Send it to the group. The phrase used to, To sarcastically mock a risky or ill-advised bet. Wow. What? Wow. Can I tell you, I didn't hear a word you said. I was still thinking about dominate Twix. I just, I feel like there's just something there. I knew you would. You know what I mean? Although I will say, Imagine if you, If your dominators came out and she, You know, Had like a bunch of payday bars or nut rolls,

[16:00]Salted nut rolls. And she's like, You got to eat like five salted nut rolls. You'd be like, Oh God, You are terrible. Yeah. What's my safe word to get a hard bar? Get me out of here. I'm not, You know, These salted nut rolls. How about hydration? I think I'd go for the dominate. Dominate. What are the, What are we calling this? Dominate kicks, Which is just a very bland white lady who just doesn't taste like it. Listen, Kick cereal was an all time joke. Wasn't it? Cause it was the same shape as peanut butter. Captain crunch is the same shape as the Reese's cereal. I mean, When I went to a friend's house and they had the Reese's cereal, I was like, How do you not take this to your bedroom and eat it all at night when Everybody's sleeping? How are, How is it just out here? Did you guys have friends like that? Where like you'd go into their fridge and they would just have a full Size candy bar in the fridge. And you're like, What the fuck is this consultant over here? It was more Rob. I I'm connecting with your cereal thing. I would remember like sleepers and stuff. You wake up and they've got cereal that you'd be like, Oh, We would never have this. Like whether it's good or bad. Like they may have some, You're like, I can't believe they get to have this every day.

[17:00]Or you'd see something like there's who the fuck's eating these grape Nuts or whatever it is, Oh, Right. Yeah. But yeah, The good ones where it's like, Oh, You just keep cabin crush with crunch berries and your fridge and your Cupboard all the time. Yeah. Like I get it like twice a year. That's just it. That's just your regular thing. Or likely you do the opposite. Like when I was slept over my cousin's house and all they had for cereal, Literally Russell was grape nuts. And then their milk was in a bag. What? The milk was in a bag. I had to cut a bag and get it out. I was like, This milk doesn't taste as good. I know it's the same. And you don't have them. They don't have somebody delivering their milk to their God. I would actually love it. Okay. So there's a few time machine moments for me. In fact, One of them was coming up soon on live at the Harlem square, But now one of my time machine moments is I would love to go back and Watch young Rob cut open a bag of milk, Pour it on a cereal and then figure out what to do with the open bag of Milk. I don't know. I got this bag of milk. What do I do? I cut the bottom of it.

[18:00]I don't know. I'm just going to drain. I'm just going to drink the whole thing. There's no way I wreck somebody's bathroom when I'm guesting at their House. There's no way I'm going to cause multiple bathroom incidents when I'm A guest at somebody's house. That'd be crazy. And then get their reputation for that. That'd be insane. That would never happen to me. I've got Russell in Minneapolis. Russell, How are you doing? Rob, Even the greatest main hosts discover themselves in the looking glass When looking at themselves, What they're looking for. They're looking at themselves in the looking glasses in the mirror. Ooh. Wow. Okay. All right. So that's half the lyrics. I got Matt in Minneapolis. Matt, How are you doing? Good. I didn't know this thing had lyrics. So I'll just say hi, Rob. Thanks for having me. And I've got Aaron out in California. Now, Aaron was recently excited about the new Midwestern Pope, Right? We've got a Midwestern Pope. Oh, His name is back. His name is Robert. I want to say, So I feel pretty represented with the new Pope, But I was, I was, I didn't know this, But Aaron, Aaron pointed out, He said, You know, It's strange because women in the Catholic church can't even rise to the

[19:00]Rank of Bishop. But yet I noticed women be shopping all the time. So I don't Russell, They can't be a Bishop, But they'd be shopping Be shopping. Hey, Leo, Leo, The 15th, You can use that one if you want. Just for the record, Aaron is laughing. I want to be clear about this. He doesn't want to laugh because he knows the joke is offensive. I tried so hard not to laugh. But he has to because he knows it's funny. I tried so hard not to laugh, But that one broke me. Do, Do, Do, Do, Do, Do, Do, Do, Do, Do, Do. That's all I can remember from the album. Wow. Let's talk about Klafftwerk. Let's, Aaron, You're good at speaking German. I didn't know that. I was trying to do your accent right. Wow. Listen, Tonight we have two voicemails.

[20:00]Okay. We've got one voicemail that was supposed to be for the theme song last week, But I still wanted to play it. Hi guys. It's Ross. Two questions for you. Russ, Why do you spell your name wrong? And two, When are you making an honest woman of the upstairs roommate? All right. So that was, That was, They called in late for the song. They kind of, They didn't realize that when I texted people and said, Hey, Can you call and leave a voicemail? I meant like in the next three hours. I don't mean like over the next, A couple of days. Like I need this immediately. It's an emergency. Okay. So here's the real voicemail. And I'll just say this right now. We don't have any more voicemails for this. We're out of voicemails. We're desperate for voicemails. Please call. If you're listening to this right now, And I know you're not 802-277-BEC. Call and leave a voicemail. Aaron, What should they leave a voicemail about this week? The, The Pope. No, Don't leave a voicemail about the Pope. Leave a voicemail about the Timberwolves. They're going to be up three to one by the time you hear this. How about this? Leave a voicemail where a candy bar is also a dominatrix.

[21:00]You know what I mean? And you would think to yourself, Oh, Rob said this. He would definitely have a joke ready to go. And of course I do. I did get a Bex the other day from a listener who wondered if maybe Matt would want a reverse champion weave sweatshirt that maybe had a Mayak team on it. Yeah. Would you want that, Matt? That does sound like something that's right up your alley. I believe it's four of them right now. A couple of baseball ones, A couple, A tattered one. Yeah. I was told I probably shouldn't be ruining this. And I actually didn't text the person back to confirm whether they should do this or not. But we ever do a live show. If, If there's clothing that's comes flying up at you at the end of the episode, It's not going to be a woman's panties, Matt. Oh, Wow. Wow. It's going to be my underwear. Yes. Okay. Stapled to a champion. Reverse. That's right. Listen, If I had a dominate Twix, I would have her crunch bar, My nuts. All right. So I did, I didn't think of a joke. I did have to look up candy bars on image search and just see it.

[22:00]Now I'm kind of transfixed. Take five swings with that paddle. See, That's another one. I got lots of, I got lots of jokes here. All right. Here's a voicemail. Hey, This is Stephen Curry. I, Oh, My ankle hurts so bad. Ooh. Oh no, It's my hamstring. Oh, My hamstring hurts so bad. I just want to call and talk to super fan Aaron. I know Aaron is a huge warriors fan. Always has been always stuck with us when times are tough. And I just want to say, I really support him, And helping us in the playoffs by definitely not, Betting on the two rules against the warriors. So thank you again. Okay. Now I'm off to see my best friend. The Raymond green is a normal guy. He doesn't get mad. All right. So if you notice there, Steph Curry seemed to get confused about his name. He said, Stephen Curry. And he also called them the warriors at the end. So it looks like maybe that was a, Maybe Steph had to do a last minute call there right away when they realized They didn't have any voicemails for the show. So Aaron, I thought you were a hardcore warriors fan.

[23:00]And then all of a sudden you're coming up with bets for the two rules game. What is going on with this? Are you not really a true fan? Do you not know ball? Wait, I, I do know ball. That's why I knew that you bet against your team, Bet against your fan. That's what you should do. You know, I mean, It's, It's the emotional hedge. I mean, I'm, I don't know. We haven't talked about the warriors that much because people don't want to Hear my sports takes. I was very mad at the warriors when they moved from Oakland to San Francisco. And I was like, I was ready to be out on the warriors. But you can't be out on Steph. Steph's too much fun. So I, I, Steph brought me back in on the warriors. But as soon as Steph got hurt, Number one, They have no chance to win the series without him. Number two, The pattern of all these games in the playoffs, Let alone stepping out is game road team takes game one home team comes Back, Blows them out in game two. It's happened to the warriors a bunch too. So I knew guaranteed this was a 25 point lead at half game. That's just what I knew. And then you threw in the Dante DiVincenzo bet and I had to,

[24:00]Had to get on more, But that one, That one didn't work out to be clear. He went to the same school as the Pope is what I heard on the text. But I do, But I, I do, I get myself in trouble around here though, Because I, It's weird. Like I'm not from Oakland, Right. But I've been here since 2010 and the dynamics out here in my neighborhood Are that there are a lot of people in my neighborhood who moved here from San Francisco when they decided to have kids. Cause they were like, Oh, I lived in the city. It was fun. But now like I moved to Oakland. Cause, There's more space. It's whatever. And I hate it. And these guys, Like they don't care about Oakland the way I do. So like when the words lose at the chase, I always am like, I like when they lose at the chase. Like I want to see the closeup of Lake of space or is lost to the chase. I love it. And I'll say that at get togethers and people look at me like I'm nuts and They don't understand. And then they're like, Well, You're not from here. I'm like, Well, I know, But I adopted them when I came here. So I, I mean, I got problems. We don't need to get into it. I don't understand at all why you like him to lose to the chase here. And you lost me on that one. I didn't, It doesn't make any sense to me. You like seeing their faces. They left. What's that? Yeah.

[25:00]They left Oakland. They left. They left where he lives. They left Oakland. Oh, I forgot. Oh, I like when they lose. I forgot about it. That's just, Aaron just told like a 30 minute story. I know they moved out of San Francisco, Rob. I kind of thought Oakland and San Francisco are like the same. Aren't they like in the same, Aren't they in the same Bay? They're across the Bay. Yeah. So how far could they move? What's the big deal? It's like a Minneapolis, St. Paul thing. Yeah. Yes, You would. Well, Oh man, How would I get there? Shake 94. That's what I would do for sure. Yeah. Okay. Oh my God. Goddamn men. Dot. Who's deciding to shut everything down. It is really bad out there. Russell. It is very, Very bad out there. But as far as the bet goes, I just, I wanted to test to see if my predictive powers were strong and they were about the lead, But not about Dante scoring buckets. It's close. He was one away. He had not, I know you need to get over 10 and a half. He was so airballed. The three, A wide open one.

[26:00]I don't know if it was right for me to make an image of the Pope holding up our bed ticket. Like he was praying that it would happen. That seemed inappropriate to me yet. I'm still saving it to the photo roll. I can't imagine. Can you imagine what my kids are going to see if I pass away and they go through my photo Roll? What have I sent you guys this week already? I sent you a picture of me in the bathtub with my coffee. By the way, Guys, I got to tell you right now, I'm an everyday bath guy. Now I am. I am. My average number of baths per day is over one. You know what I mean? Cause I, I'm taking one every morning. You sent a picture of your legs in your bath to us today. Like when the bath was probably a quarter full, It looked really sad and pathetic. Like there was part of me that thought you had like a big whirlpool bath and you really Don't. It's just like an old, Old bathtub. Classic. Yeah. Classic 1950s Rambler house tub. Yeah. First of all, When I'm in a bathtub, It does, It is kind of Lord of the Rings where the perspective, It gets a little off. Okay. It does. The bathtub looks very small when I'm in it. Cause you're a big wiener. Oh,

[27:00]That was the other thing is I was like, I was like, How far can I go up my legs and not show my wiener, But also not make the guys realize how small of a wiener I have. You know what I mean? Like if I'm all the way up to the knuckle and you're like, I still don't see his wiener. That's weird. How many, How many messed up? How many pictures did you not send us? Like it wasn't one of one. How many were there? Over 12 or not? Okay. I'm looking at it. That's what you got to triple check before you hit send. Right? Right. No, No. To you guys. I'm not triple checking that. No way. I don't get it. I can see all of his pubes and I don't see anything at all. This doesn't make any sense to me. All right. Listen, Let's get into a rolling going now. The plan for this episode was we were all going to get super stone. Is that still happening? All right. And all right. I'm seeing hands up. Okay. You saw how hard I left at your B shopping joke.

[28:00]That is, Well, You know what that means then guys? I better join it. How are we going to, Are we going to mention it at all? How do we mention it without saying that? I don't want to really want to say it on the podcast. No, We don't need to say it. You don't have to be our little secret. Oh my God. That's just like when I, I couldn't afford a full-size deodorant. I had to just get the little secret. You know what I mean? Yeah. Russell, I use women's deodorant. I think it smells better. That's part of your turn. Age balanced for a woman strong enough for a man. Just kidding. My wife loves it when I smell like sandalwood. Have you ever been a deodorant, A spray on deodorant guy? Or are you always like a roll on guy? When I started, When I was younger, I was a spray on deodorant guy. And I think that might be one of the reasons my mom always said I was so smelly. It's because I was so smelly because I was using spray on deodorant. I remember it came in giant cans. Like we had a spray on deodorant can that was like, A two liter bottle size. It was huge. Oh my God. Oh,

[29:00]I'm knowing the cold just to go there. Really? There's something that's making me cough. It's almost like listening to a German electronic album. I've made choices before this episode to help me enjoy this episode more. And it seems to be backfiring immensely because it's hard for me to keep track With what's going on. But I do know that right now it's rolling going and I know it's Aaron's turn To roll and go. I don't know. I'm rolling and going. I had a couple of bummer things happened recently. Bummer dude. Yeah. I hate to make this surfboard. You got bitten by a shark getting older podcast. I think Rob already talked about an over forties joke unless that was last Week. I pulled my groin. Oh yeah. Twice a day. Wait, What? Doing pushups. So I'm trying to, What are we talking about? I'm trying to, We're getting fiercely close to a button. I'm trying to learn one arm pushups.

[30:00]So I've been trying to learn what I'm pushing. So of course there's a program for everything, Right? So I'm on the one arm pushup program and simultaneously I've been, I took a Neil from Lakeville's advice on what time in Wisconsin is Neil from Wisconsin Rapids turtle Lake. Is that a place? Wisconsin Rapids. Okay. I took his advice and doesn't that sound like he was born at a water park? Doesn't that make, Doesn't that make it sound like if you go there, There's a water slide that goes both in and out. I mean, If I went to Wisconsin Rapids and there were no, There was no lazy river. Oh my God, I would be so pissed. Oh, I'm going to go in the bathroom to go to the bathroom. I don't think so. That's why I call it the lazy river. Trying these atomic workouts that Neil suggested, Which are great. So I've been trying to like, I'm going to put sprint in air quotes. Cause it's not really what I'm doing. I didn't try to like run at my top speed. Right. A couple of times a week. Now, Aaron, Can I just ask you real quick? Is your kids seeing this? Is your kids seeing you attempt to get up to full speed? No, Not yet.

[31:00]No. Are your neighbors? Are your neighbors have seen they have, But I stopped doing it in the street. Cause I realized I can get to the park. Yeah. I did it in the street twice and I was hoping no one would see. And then they did. And I was like, I got, No, That's I'm out on that. So, You know, Not, I'm doing this. I'm doing this explosive workout. Just all their shades close doors. Yeah. They're like, That's not explosive. Nope. That's not it. Yeah. When's the, When's the explosion? Nobody's here. Wait a minute. Then who's talking right now? Oh, This is a videotape. We made not wise to try to learn two different, New athletic pursuits at the same time at our age. And it turns out if you're trying a one arm pushup, There's a lot of like cross body stabilization that goes into it. So I was on my back step. Cause it was, That's the lowest elevation that I can comfortably do. So that was my, It was supposed to be my hard day and I was on my fifth of five. And I lower myself on my left arm and I felt a pop in my

[32:00]Right groin. So that's it. And oh my God, I'm going to pass out. And then I texted my brother because I'd been making jokes about muscle Strains on the text with him. And he said, Sometimes the BDIB jokes, Right themselves. And I said, You know, That's exactly what happened. I'm down there in my backyard. I feel a popping sensation in my groin. And my first thought is, Well, I got to tell the guys about this. So obviously my brain is broken and it's clear that the people around me Know the same thing. Are you walking with a visible limp? Not today. No. Maybe on Wednesday I was, But now today, No, No. Did anybody say like what, What happened now? Now did anybody say like what happened? I said, I pulled my groin doing one arm pushups. Cause they would never believe that. That sounds like something my kids would say, You know what I mean? And I want to be clear. I want to be clear to our listeners. I was not doing on the ground one arm pushups. I'm training to learn how to do it. I'm doing elevated. So I don't want anyone to think that Aaron said he can do a one arm pushup. No one thought you could. No one thought you could. I'm trying to, I would not say that.

[33:00]I could do a one arm pushup. Rob, You're much stronger than I know. I could. You're strong. I know. I believe that. I know. I could much stronger than we think you are. Your question. Did you treat the injury with heat or cool? Or did you go with the hot ice? I mean, How did you treat the injury? Did you ask somebody in your house? Were you like, I injured myself so bad. I've mostly been trying to mobilize it. I looked it up on chat GPT and it said we turned on this new streaming program we have called Nudge Flex. Well what it is? It's an adductor strain. So I need to be strengthening my adductor. So you know what I'm doing next. Oh my gosh. Get one of the machines. You know what's happening next. Wow. That's where you'll find me. You'll go from REI and send it back when you're back to 100% on your new account. Aaron, how long is the conversation about your muscle pull with your wife? Is it like a whole dinner or like under a whole dinner or over? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. It's like under a whole dinner, but then it's like later. It's like later. She's like, hey, maybe you didn't need to try that stuff.

[34:00]Your body clearly can't handle it. Well, yeah, you're okay. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. And then you said back, haters are my motivators. Keep it up. Yeah. I'm going to be doing more one-up push-ups than I've ever done before. And I'll show you. And she's like, why do you care? I'm doing this for you. Doing it for you. Russell, it would be depressing if the man you married, you look out the side. In the backyard. And he's doing one-arm push-ups, just leaning up against the house. He's like this. I'm supposed to do this for three weeks. This is the training. I'm really. You got to work your way up. I'm going to start somewhere. So I'm going to come back stronger. So next week, when you guys hear me, my groin is going to be almost a hundred percent. How's it really going with Matt? Do you know what I figured out? LinkedIn. I like looking at LinkedIn. I think we established that. What might be the worst thing on LinkedIn is the meatheads. Who like to post their workouts on LinkedIn and say, Oh motivation Monday. Oh, got my workout in and ready to dominate today.

[35:00]That might, those are the worst people. It's the wrong channel for it. Is it me now? Are we supposed to talk? Yes, it's your own guys. Listen, don't tell the audience, but all of us getting stoned before the episode was terrible. We, we cannot do this. We're listen. We're hanging on the edge of a cliff. Like some movie. I can't even think of right now. Normally Rob is this is the part of the podcast where we do the rolling going. Yeah. What? Two of us have done it. Special surprise. Oh, we call this the check-in. And it calls us the check-in. Oh, wow. Check-ins. No, she says when she hears this, like she'll ask me, what are you going to do in your check-in Tonight? I love that. She purposely doesn't call it really. That feels like a Western Metro thing to me for West of the Western Metro. I'll take dark meat, but he used to Redwood Falls.

[36:00]What? Well, if we're doing a check-in, I'll take some dark. That's a bad joke. I'll take some Nashville. Short is just a check-in nugget. You know what I mean? Like it's just a little. You'll never believe. Remember that time Russell took all of his clothes off during this part? Yeah. Chicken strip. I mean, come on. Remember that time we were so tired and could barely get it together. We were fried chicken. No, I don't remember that. But what I do remember is when I, Russell came for his check-in and the popular TV shows Host, James Cordon was very sad next to him. And that was, of course, was a check-in Cordon blue. Oh, I'm sad. Nobody will do carpool karaoke with me. Oh, for this check-in Cordon's blue.

[37:00]Cordon's blue. Matt, only you can save us if you're wrong. I'm just. Oh, James Cordon is. Well, we might as well just keep this play. Guys, I remember when I played defensive hockey in the NHL and Mike Madonna was skating right Through the middle. And so I checked him in. Oh, you don't get the joke structure. Wait, was that a check-in check-in? It was a check-in check-in. Wow. That's crazy. I apologize for rooting the comedic timing. Sir, Matt. Oh, oh, I thought you said Mac. And I was like, what is this, a Mac check-in? Guys, last night, well, let's see, about 26 hours ago, I had a, I think An existential. I don't know what an existential crisis is, but I think, Rob, what is the definition of An existential crisis?

[38:00]All right. Existential. Well, I think it has to do something. I mean, to me, probably aliens. It's a little guy. Existential. Oh, my God. E.D. E.D. E.D. E.T. Has feeling of worthlessness in society. Oh, this is an extraterrestrial. This is an existential. Extra. What is the word we're looking up? Existential. What does the T stand for? What does the T stand for in E.T.? Terrestrial. Extraterrestrial. So this is existential. So it could also be E.T. E.T. Dreads going home, brings up bad memories. Oh. Is that what an existential crisis is? Has mommy issues. I should look it up. I don't know. Honestly, I read a book about existentialism written by St. Old Professor Gordon Marino. I got it right here. Yeah, and I still don't understand it any better. You got that one too? Yeah, I ordered it. Do you understand? Coach Marino is a good guy. I like reading his articles. An existential crisis is a period.

[39:00]Oh, well, I guess that's the end of that sentence. Guys, don't tell anybody about this, but getting high before the episode was one of the best Ideas we've ever had. We're on a roll. Is that an English joke? Oh, we're on a roll. Call me butter. All right. Existential crisis is a period. Would it be funny a second time? No. Maybe. Of inner conflict where individuals question the meaning of life, their purpose, and their Own identity. We have one of these every week on this podcast. Oh, my God. Every time I log off and I look at the clock and I go, well, shortening my life for something 80 people are going to listen to. I can open my window and more people would hear me talk than this podcast. Yes. I can open my window. You ride a train home every day with more people.

[40:00]What is the purpose of E.T.'s life? Oh, my God. This is existential. Existential E.T. It often involves feelings of anxiety, stress, and confusion. Well, I never have those. And can be triggered by life transitions or significant personal experiences. Hmm. Well, maybe I'll say. Maybe a significant personal experience. Last night, I was in Nashville, Tennessee. Wow. And I was taking in a Pearl Jam concert. Oh, wow. In Nashville. The football stadium? Nope. Nope. Nope. But the hockey arena. Hockey arena. Bridgestone Arena. Yep. It was awesome. It was just awesome. I was there for work. Parlayed it into knowing that they were going to be there and stuff like that. So, it was great. It was great. I only had to wait in the merch line for like an hour. It wasn't bad. It went around about half of the stadium before getting there.

[41:00]So, I got a poster. I did buy a t-shirt. I have not bought a t-shirt in years. But there was one that looked pretty good. Nice. Bad material, though, Russell. So, it's probably going to have to go to the cat in the sleeve. Oh, it's going to be a hard t-shirt. Yep. Probably shrink right up a little bit on you. Yeah. Matt, if I were a female going to the restrooms there, would I have a lot of space in the restrooms? In the restrooms? Are there like... Well, I would say not... Normally, I'd say you'd have a lot of space. Because when I go to a They Might Be Giants concert, the men's bathroom is packed. You know what I mean? There are a lot of dudes there. There was more females surprising than this. This is part of my story, too, though, about the existential crisis of what's going on. But I don't know if it's existential crisis or not. So, I'm at the Pearl Jam concert. I'm there by myself. I went to Rippy's beforehand across the street. I got to sit there and watch the first half of the T-Wolves game before going in. Because, of course, I checked set list to see that they go on at 8.50.

[42:00]About 8.50 on all their shows. Yep. You know, so I knew they were... So, I left about 8.30, got to my seat about 8.42. I was timing it up perfect. And then I realized I was having just an awesome time by myself, at a concert by myself. And then I realized that there's nobody else in my life. No, not one single person in my life. That I could go to a Pearl Jam concert with. Just nobody would experience it and have as much fun. Because I'm looking at people around and you'll see half of the women there. Half of the women there. Right. Are there with some sort of significant other or whatever. And they're sitting down halfway between because all they want to hear is Even Flow and Jeremy And the three songs they know. And they don't celebrate the entire collection like I do. And I'm just having... They played my favorite song of all time, Long Road. Wow. They played the Long Road. By Pearl Jam. That's who they opened with. I was having... I was just... Opened with your number one song. Opened with my number one song. It was unbelievable. It was unbelievable.

[43:00]Wow. Matt, what would you say to people who are saying, and I wouldn't say this, but people Who are saying the issue is, is that you're now a Pearl Jam snob. Yes. I mean, that could be too. And I fully admit that, right? I mean, like, I am going to go sit in the merch line for an hour. Person after person would turn the corner and they'd look at how long the line was, and Typically females, and they'd say, oh, good God, no way kind of a thing. But me, and I would say 90% of the line was of the male gender. And we were waiting to get our posters and our t-shirts and all that stuff. And it was just, it's part of the gig. There was a bus driver, a bus pulled up. This is at like 1.30 in the afternoon. So concerts not till 8.50 like we talked about. You know, bus pulls up. Let's out a whole bunch. Old ladies who were going to some museum or something across the street. Yeah. And he comes up, he goes, why? Music Hall of Fame. Don't you guys have tickets already?

[44:00]You know, why are you waiting in line at 1.30? Just go get, and the person ahead of me is like, oh, no, this is just for the merch. And the guy goes, what? You're just waiting in line for merchandise? And he's just shaking his head. We all had a nice little chuckle, like, how that guy doesn't know. Wait a minute. Of course you wait in line. Wait a minute. You're, you were there before the concert waiting in the merch line? Oh, yeah. You have to. The sellout posters, they sell out if you don't get them in time. Man, I apologize. I underestimated your fandom of Pearl Jam. I'm not sure how I did it. I did not realize that you're, like, you're one of how many guys in Nashville waiting outside before the concert starts? Oh there was like, I'm an amateur compared to some people. I'm playing right out and playing right home, stuff like that. I mean, there was people. There's people that bring, they've got their own special tubes, right? It looks like a, like, you'd hold, like, fishing rods in, kind of a thing, if you can picture that, if you're ever traveling.

[45:00]But it's just for posters. I mean, and they've got all their stickers from all the bands they've got just to get the posters, stuff like that. People are buying music posters still? Oh, yeah. Yep. There's people. Every concert. I think I'm down to, I need one more. I need St. Paul in 2016. And then I've got every poster of the shows that I've been to, which is now seven. How many of them do you have hanging up? None. You know what band I would wait for their poster? What's that? When I went to that Pink Floyd concert, because hubba, the poster. Ah, you guys know the one I'm talking about. The Butts. You guys remember that one? The Pink Floyd Butts poster? What? Please don't tell me that I just remembered a Pink Floyd Butts poster that nobody else knows. Am I a pervert? I'm only aware of. I'm only aware of. The two covers of the two albums. I'd never even see. I wouldn't even know what a Pink Floyd poster looks like. This one. Yeah. What? What the hell album is this?

[46:00]No, it's a poster. It was never an album. That's all their albums. It's their albums painted on women's bags. Painted on chicks. Yeah. You can see their butt curves. Never seen it. You know what concert I would go for the poster of? That, what was that one where the girls were serving beer out of a pitcher? It was like they were, do you guys know what I'm talking about? It's from Mix-A-Lot. No. Euro Trip? Euro Trip. Euro Trip. Euro Trip. Euro Trip. It was a classic like beer, busty woman poster. Can't remember what it is. What posters do you guys have up in college? I had a. Oh, I did the Godfather. Oh. I did the Godfather. I thought that was a very cool move. Yeah. I had Snoop Dogg and Tupac together. I thought that was a great poster. Oh, that's a cool move. I have, I had three. One was, I had a, like, it was like when I like a train crashed where it just said shit In big letters. I remember that. It was like you see it once in a while. Like you see it once in a while. You see like the Hindenburg one. It doesn't just say shit. So this was like, it was like a black and white train crash. And then it just said shit in huge letters. So that was one.

[47:00]Can I just ask, what was the vibe you're trying to curate in your room with that poster? Nobody wants to bring somebody home to their room, look over and just say shit. What was the vibe of your room, Russell? Describe it in a couple words. Actually, he, Russell was the less angry person in his room. I think our room was the most popular room to be in. Oh. A year without a poster up. There was always people. Without a doubt. Yeah. The poster sale was awesome though. Poster two was, I had the Blues Brothers. I've seen people in college, Russell, that had posters that swore or hot women on them. I felt like the first time I saw people smoking at college, I was like, holy shit, you can't Do that. We're at school. You cannot be smoking at school. And then I'd go into somebody's room and there's a swear word on the poster. I'd be like, what if your parents come and it's awkward because they've never seen a Swear word before. Let me go sit in the corner with my family. Let me go sit in the corner with my family. That's a ferret. Well, that guy puts up a super illegal poster. That's so fucked. That's so fucked. I never think about that ferret except for on here. Sorry, Russell.

[48:00]Go ahead. What other posters did you have besides this shit? I had a poster. This was out of college. I had a poster up in my room for a long time of the famous Johnny Cash, Big Middle Finger. That's a good name. Yeah, with cash. A little bit of a theme. Yeah. Okay. That's good. That's my poster game. Wow. Wow. Great poster games. So, I don't know if it's a crisis. It feels. It feels existential for some reason because I was half thinking that there's nobody in My life that will do I got to find a new friend or something like that. And the other half was, I just don't give a fuck kind of a thing. Like, I had such a good time and I would not, I wouldn't want to do that like six times A year kind of thing or follow them around solo things like, but like one night to just Be a Pearl Jam fan by myself. And I would take there used to be a guy, Matt from East St. Paul, good buddies with Joe from East St. Paul. You know, he used to go with me, but then he even started he didn't want to Go to like two nights. He just wanted to go to one night, things like that.

[49:00]So he started to kind of, so I don't know. I got to find a new guy, but if I don't, it'll be okay. I think you lean into enjoying it by yourself because honestly, you probably don't enjoy It the same if someone else was there with you. You feel like you got to cater to what they want to do or I think you just do it yourself. Yeah. I, for many years was a big, any like. Big sports game. I'm, I have to watch by myself. Like if you guys were saying, Hey, we're going to a bar, I would say, absolutely Not. I'm not going, I'm not watching that, but maybe sometimes you just got to lean into The, like, that's what I want to do and enjoy it by myself. When you go with somebody, don't you look over at them and see just a little bit to See if they're enjoying it like as much as you are. Cause when I go see they might be giants, Jenny now wants to come with me. It's a date, but a lot of it is me looking at her being like, she, she's having A good time. Like she doesn't know anything. These songs that she haven't. And it kind of stresses me out. Maybe I would enjoy it more by myself. It would stress me. It, it, it, it might. And I could, that's all these people started sitting down and I, I just

[50:00]Know like the old albums, the first three are the ones that everybody Knows and everybody sings every song, but then there's the later call it 1997 and on From no code on the Pearl jam geeks where they have, that's kind of their identity as Like a, a live band. They're a live band with these new ones, kind of a deal. And so it's, yeah. What's your favorite live band? Alive. No, they're in a live band. I mean, they made that album, right? Alive. Well, the song alive is on. Oh, well, I was talking about the single. So, oh, but you know, that, so they play all the half of the songs or everybody Knows the other half, nobody knows. And those were, that's when the women sit down and people go back. But like, so that's the only thing I know. Every song, right? Right. 98% of the songs that show up on set list. I know what album, things like that. And so, yeah, it's, it, it would be a little different, but I really wouldn't care.

[51:00]I don't think so. Can I say this to you, man? First of all, I just want to get the timing down one more time. What time the concerts, what time did the doors open versus when you were There? I think Matt's waiting in two lines. You're getting merch before the concert, taking it back to your room. So I got merch. I got in line about one 30 in the merch line and I got to up to the front about two 30. Oh, so it was about an hour. I grabbed all my stuff, brought it back to my hotel room. We didn't wait there for six, seven hours. Can I just tell you, and I don't know why I would be confused at this point of the night. There's no reason. Okay. Oh, who's this? Somebody just came in to order a martini on stirred bong, James bong. Here's the thing. In my mind, the concert venue did not open until the concert would start and there's No way you could possibly get merch. But I realized now that doesn't make sense. That's honestly blowing my mind too. No, no. Like every all these places have like a merchandise tents now That put outside of the arena, things like that.

[52:00]Sorry. I just figure everybody knows that. Sorry. I got to remember to tell you guys. That's better than the tent I went to Matt, where they handed me white, two white cubes. And they said, now move on out soldier one, two, one, two. And it turned out they, I had gone to a marching dice. Tent. And they were selling me marching dice, which of course are dice. Hey, I'm marching over here. How about that? Oh, hop to what? Marching. Marching dice. Marching dice. That's your finest work, Rob. Wait a minute. That's really fine work. Guys. I just thought of a marching dice. That's going to blow your mind. Okay. Wait a minute. Watch this. Wait a minute. He says, okay. Here we go. Ready? Here we go. Okay. This is a marching. It's going to absolutely blow your mind. Hey, I got to think of jokes.

[53:00]Oh, I was six afraid of seven. The seven, eight, nine sat on a wall. I bet he did that. That fuck. Oh this is the marching dice tent. I was wondering why. It was open so far. We were at the concert. I wonder why there was no line. John Phillips, Susan on my face. Oh. Stars and stripes four inches forever. Yeah. Oh, he said yeah that time. I don't normally say yeah. That's sorry. That's my bad. But somebody just recorded Rob, just like with a video from like behind Where you can't hear anything else that's going on. And it's just. Oh, oh. Excuse me while I empty my trumpet flute. Oh, oh. Oh, I like to French porn right now. Oh, oh.

[54:00]She said you got a tight embouchure. I said that's my butthole. Oh, this marching dice tent is wild to me. The Pearl Jam Cosmos served for four hours. I'm just looking at other instruments. Xylophone, more like xylophone. Okay, clarinet. No. We lost Russell. We got to. That's your best embouchure joke ever. That's a great embouchure joke. Trombone. That would be the one funny thing if Andrew Dice Clay was stuck on. He's like trombone. Trombone. I just. I can't think of any joke for that. I just can't think of it. It looks like a piccolo right there. His friends are like, Andrew, Mr. Clay, sir.

[55:00]Trombone is the easiest instrument to make a sex joke about. It's right there in the name. Russell, rolling going. How's it going with you? Rolling going. Last week, I took personal day. I took a personal day for work as just a mental health relaxation day. Very nice. Very nice. Good work. What day did you take, though? What day of the week did you take? I took a Friday. Yeah. Oh. I go Wednesday. We know that. I could do no more. So I took a day. I spent a lot of time sitting around like in my downstairs office, just like organizing, Throwing like old papers away. Just mindless stuff. So I was curious. What do you guys like to do on your mental health day? If you're just sitting around with the goal of doing nothing. Well, like I'll just say. Briefly my, usually when I, my, my time to get all of that kind of stuff done Is right before this podcast, because usually we say we're going to like start recording

[56:00]At like 11 and then it's like 1130, but it allows me to get like some laundry done and I get all of the, all of my shirts ready back here to take to the dry cleaner, things like That. But Russell, I got to tell you, it's a little different with kids what, What the mental health day is because. Half of you feels real guilty. If you're not, if it's like a weekend or something like that, you're not doing something with Them or, or for them. I don't know. But like, it's hard to relax because I just know that like the kids are coming home in A couple hours and I should be doing this. I should be doing that. But how often do I get to watch surround sound porn? You know what I mean? How often? Yeah. I put Jeremiah Johnson on and lay it in the basement. Yes. The headboard hitting the wall behind me. It's like I'm in the movie. So to answer your question. Russell, I like to lay in my basement and just watch some sort of mindless movie. That's what I like. Maybe a born identity, something I've watched, maybe the Godfather, something I've watched,

[57:00]But that's what I like to do on my mental health days. I will tell you this. You know what I do, Russell? When I have a day where I'm like, fuck it. And I don't have a lot of these days. I will go through all summer. I'm, I'm like three weeks of vacation. You guys get in the spring. I'm writing curriculum. Is that how you pronounce it? Listen, I go through my Gmail, Russell, and I unsubscribe as many emails as I can. I go through and I clear house. I'm unsubscribing from all these emails, actually like clicking all the buttons to get it done. It feels so good when you go through, just do it for like 10, 15 minutes. Your life feels awesome. You feel like you got stuff done. Man, I'm impressed you guys would get stuff done on a mental health day. Like if it was me, I'd probably try to. Do something outside and then I'd take some naps and then I would read comic books And watch something dumb on TV and then take another nap and then make myself some eggs.

[58:00]That'd be my, my, my mental health economy. Yeah. My mental health extended into a mental health weekend. So I did some other stuff. That's smart. But one of the things you guys know that is my new Zen thing. My moment to relax the most is going to the record store. I went to another record store. Adventure Rob, hit the music. Oh, I know you're going to say hit the music. So I'm actually ready now. Can I just say this joke? Otherwise I'm not going to be able to think about anything else. Yeah, please. I was going to take a mental health day. This is so stupid. I was going to take a mental health day the other day, but I screwed it up. And I had, they said, sir, you have to give this back. Don't eat it. And it turned out I did a rental Heath day. Rental Heath day. Sir, that toffee is not yours. Hey, remember that contract you signed? It just said, I will not eat it in real big letters.

[59:00]I don't know why I had to sign it. Can I eat it if you keep my security deposit? That's a scam. They're always, they won't give you back that deposit, Russell. Oh, excuse me. You have 30 days. Oh, thank you so much. I don't know. I told you the story of when I got kicked out of that apartment because it was too messy, didn't I? Yes. I had my lawyer send a letter to him, but my lawyer also has my name. She said she knew it was your dad. Do not harass my client, Robert blank. Signed, lawyer, Robert blank. And she did say to me, oh, your daddy wants to get you out. And I was like, well, yeah, I don't know. I mean, all right. He is my daddy. There brings me sandwiches in the bath. I'm such a pay piggy for my dad. I give him money. You know, landlords are kind of the original pay pigs. You think about it. Sorry, Russell. Go ahead. Oh, so I went, by the way, a few weeks ago, our buddy, John from Edina had mentioned

[1:00:00]He went to mill city sound in Hopkins, Matt just sold that just sold a little west Of the cities. What did that be? North of seven. You can take the loose line trail to get there if you're on your bike. Yep. You can. Yeah. The green. It's in downtown Hopkins. It's all the way out there. It's all the way out there. And so it's, it's kind of a cool older city, right? A little old town. You could have bought that record store we should have about three months ago. Oh, so I went and I'd never been to this one, but John said it was great. I have to say blown away. I think this is the best record store I've been to by far. Oh, yeah. It's well known to be the best one. Yep. Oh, wow. I went through and they've got names like John's. They've kind of got sections. Like there's kind of like an R and B section, a blue section rock. So you're, you're working your way through the section. They've got names for all the artists, but the big thing is they've got good used records There. Like I'm going to give you guys a list. It's the most I've ever bought in one trip, all time, 500 albums, all used.

[1:01:00]Wow. So like there are good records here for all sorts of good artists. Here's where, when I started to see kind of the style or what they, all they had, there Was like, I'm going to look for this one first to see if I can get it. And to me, if this is here, this will be a good record. This is going to be a good store. It's used. It's Ray Charles, modern sounds in country and Western music. How awesome is that? Wow. And Russell, can I just say this? That's the album you put on top when you're buying these, you put that one on top and You say, I'm a smart motherfucker. Nobody else would ever know what this album is unless you know, ball, Russell Ball. Next one is the only one I've listened to so far since I showed up. It's on the list. It's Stevie wonder. We got inner visions. Wow. Wow. I like that one. Mr. I think you used to say that was your favorite one or no, or what was your, no, that was My favorite. Yeah. Another one. Top 500 list.

[1:02:00]This is a two record set. It's a wreath of Franklin. Amazing grace. Oh yes. Oh my God. Russell. This is a legit store I'm talking about right now. Right. That's incredible. Just those three enough. When was a guy impressed when you were buying these? Did he say, did he kind of like, I had so much. I had to go up to the desk and say, can you hold these while I keep looking? Oh, good move. Big baller. Big ball. Such a big baller. I love it. Next up. Also coming up on the list. This isn't for another couple of years. I don't think, but it's Aerosmith. It rocks. Wow. That's like seventies Aerosmith back in the saddle. Last child rats in the cellar combination. Sick as a dog. Nobody's fault. Get the let out. Lick and promise and home tonight. I wonder which one I'll be doing a parody song to wonder if it's going to be back in the saddle. Maybe I did purchase one album that was not on the list. This is an all-time Russ favorite.

[1:03:00]So I couldn't walk past it. It's the blues brother soundtrack. Oh, I don't want to be, make you feel bad about that, but that is not on the soundtrack. That's okay. Next one on the list. This is where I know I've got a top 500 album list where I'm just trying to get them all now. Cause I don't even really love this one. We talked about this before, but I saw it used. I'm going to get it. It's this year's model. Elvis Costello. Oh my God. I mean, you gotta be in the collection, man. You look so smart, Russell. I hate to do this and I really apologize, but I had a great killer joke and this show with, But you need to go back to album. Cause I have to, can you go back to albums? There's a joke two albums ago and I can't remember what the album was. Aerosmith rocks. I just remembered my joke.

[1:04:00]Okay. Next one on the list that I picked up for some people, it's their favorite gentleman's club. For me, it's one of my favorite albums. Not really. It's deja vu. Crosby steals. Oh, I like that one. I bet that would sound good. I bet that's a great sounding vinyl. And this man looks like it feels like the old type of one. When you guys have talked about like, is this an old one or a brand new? This one feels old. Oh, like that's so great. This one is one. I don't think we've ever talked really about this solo album. It's not for till later in the list. I think it's three or four hundreds, Matt. It's Paul McCartney Ram. Ooh. Oh, that's a weird cover. Yeah, it is a weird cover, isn't it? Yeah. It's a cool cover. I like this. I like this second album better. F-150. Next one is Talking Book. Russell what the third album was called? Yeah.

[1:05:00]Silverado. Silverado? Yeah. Like the Chevy? You said it. Does it have a hemi? Next one is Stevie Wonder Talking Book. Also great. Oh, so good, Russell. Stevie Wonder all-time 500 album. All the albums from the same store used. Russell, what is your record storage situation right now? You are quickly getting more and more records. I'm a little worried. I've got multiple stacks now places where they're not supposed to be, Including up in the kitchen table. It's getting out of control. That's tough. Aaron doesn't like the... Listen, normally, Russell, when you're talking records and stacks, That's a good thing. You know what I mean? But not when you're stacking your records. You know what, Aaron, did you get that joke? I got it, yeah. S-T-A-X. Like Stacks Records? Stacks Records, yeah. No, that was good. I worked at the place across the street, the Snacks Record Shop. It's just records and records would be munching. And my best record, five candy bars in a minute.

[1:06:00]If Rob, all of his best records were on one album, It would be the Rob Anthology. I also picked up an Anthology album. It was Diana Ross and the Supremes, which is on the list. A lot of good hits. A lot of good hits. That's like when I studied my uncle's wife for a long time. My major was Anthology. Aaron, where'd you go? Aaron literally got up and walked away. You can't take any more of this. I'll keep it going for the last few that I got for you guys. I just had to stand up for a second. Anthology, Aaron. Next on my list was Honky Chateau by Elton John, Which is coming up on the list. That's a good one. Is that my favorite Elton John song? Jamaican Jerk Off on it? What is on there? Honky Cat, Mellow, I Think I'm Gonna Kill Myself, Suzy, Rocket Man. Russell. Salvation, Slave, Amy, Mona's, Lisa's, and Mad Hatter's, and Hercules. I feel like he's trying to tell us something. Quite a wild ride. This one, I thought you guys would get a kick out of this. Honky Cat, by the way, one of the worst songs of all time.

[1:07:00]It's bad. It's a crazy song. This is the one I'm looking forward to listening to the most, I think. It's Rufus, Ask Rufus, featuring Chaka Khan. Oh, yeah. Rufus can get down. Wow. Russell. Now, there is no one named Rufus in the band Rufus. Oh. No? It's not a joke. That's just a true story. What about their, well who is in the band? It's a guy named Floris. Oh. He was Rufus's opposite in almost every way. You want to guess who else was in the band, Aaron? Walsest. Last one I picked up, this guy did have his name in the band, And he was in the band. It's Electric Ladyland, Jimi Hendrix and the Experience. Oh, man. Oh, yeah. So, that was my haul from Milsom. Jeez. Sound. I love that you just kept going. A great record store. They're used stuff. If you're looking for big-time records, used records, They have a ton of new stuff as well.

[1:08:00]You could easily spend hours there. I'd highly recommend it. John from Edina turned me on to a great spot. Russell. Great job. Would you say you enjoy going, kind of like Matt, Do you enjoy going to a record store with other people or on your own? It's funny, Rob. There's just been a real conversation in this house that I, Like, I would prefer to go to a record store alone. Russell, just going to give you a quick tip. Yes. I know. We're all thinking it. You can't say it out. You can't say it out loud. No, you can take it. You can stay up here and you can say, Oh, I would love to do this by myself, okay? But I just keep that inside. You can't let that out. You can't tell people, yes, I would rather be by myself than with you. I just don't think you could do that, Russell. So, I should not. I should not say, are we ever going to make money on this podcast, right? I shouldn't say that. Listen, after this episode, Russell, we're going to blow up for sure. Speaking of blowing up, Rob Rowland, how is it going with you?

[1:09:00]I got on a train today and I had a box of Boston Baked Beans in my pocket. I am back on my shit. I bought four boxes of Boston Baked Beans today. I ate one. I ate one on the train ride home. And this is a full-size movie theater-sized box of Boston Baked Beans. I have been Boston Baked Bean free for like two weeks. I thought I was doing so well. Catch two weeks up. And you know what? Honestly, I was like, I could just, I'm not making a joke. I was like, I'll just open this box and I have a few. You know what I mean? Like, I'm just going to grab a couple of these Boston Baked Beans and just put them in my mouth. By the end of the train ride, I had the box out of my pocket, Up in the air, like it was a muggle. And I'm draining it down because it's the very last ones. It didn't even make the train ride. And then halfway through to the train ride, guess what happened? I was digging Boston Baked Beans out of my pocket.

[1:10:00]And like 10 of them spilled on the ground and made all this noise. And everyone in the train looked at me and the doors opened and it wasn't my stop. And I still got out and went to another train car. They probably did because I was so embarrassed. I cannot be can you imagine if a guy next to you spills 10, 10 Boston Baked Beans out of his pocket? Rob, what is it about the Boston Baked Beans that inspires such fervor in you? What's the, what's the satisfaction? Oh, it's, oh, it's because his wife said he couldn't have them anymore. It's the forbidden, it's the forbidden fruit of Jesus. She doesn't give a shit if he eats starbursts, but. This, there's something about that. It is kind of, I think it is kind of a weird thing where it's like, I eat as much as I want. And I'm going to eat so many that she's going to hate them. I'm going to take the one thing she loves. And. Yeah. Turn it into dust. But that's probably not it. Hey, it's not like she did that with your weightlifting or anything, huh? No. She's my coach because she's very good with numbers.

[1:11:00]She thinks about them a lot. Some might say she's more comfortable with numbers than anything else. She interacts sometimes better with numbers than people. Yeah, you had to make that one. I couldn't do it. Today by the way she and my kid came home so anyway spilled boston big beans on the Ran off the train yeah and then it went to a different car and i was like yeah i had to Act like the other car had the weirdo like oh my god get me out of there some guy in there's Spilling all these boston big beans well i'm gonna take these out and dump them into my mouth like a Steam shovel now please ignore that's happening and then my i had a kid and a wife Come home and they were both hungry and angry at me because i had ordered dinner and they had Wanted the dinner to arrive at the exact same time they arrived and it arrived three minutes later And they were so mad they were both mad at me she was like and i knew she was back and she comes As he goes you're playing video games i was like what you've never said that to me in my life and

[1:12:00]I was like oh no he's hungry this is really bad and then the kid came in i was like oh no she's Hungry my other kid knew took off hid your ladies ever get hungry guys what is it do your ladies get Hungry and grumpy How do you avoid that God i thought i was gonna say something filthy there Can you imagine if they got grumpy because they weren't getting dick enough God i just wish you'd do some work around here i'm sorry i just need that dick so bad Oh no Okay you guys don't want to talk about your Wife's getting grumpy by and by me let's talk about this album hey you're gonna make me talk About craft work yeah we'll take you let's talk craft work all right listen three is this a music Podcast this album so we have craft work in the 70s this is the earliest techno electronica this

[1:13:00]Is it this is like there was something about these guys where they just totally blew up they started This is their sixth album blew up they must not have had a birthday or anything i guess then They just had no birthday Well they didn't have a birthday but no one cares right we don't know when they were born Who crafts by the way yeah who gives a shit about them really and you know what if you notice i put An e in birthday after the i so it looks german okay raff work i'm gonna look up birthdays Okay let's look up you know what ralph hooten was born august of 1946 and then florian Schneider leo 1947 In germany so probably best not to go down that road too much let's not explore that Let's move on russell actually bringing the podcast down with his birthday talk Okay it's giving me some existential dread okay and that reminds me of a little bit from earlier

[1:14:00]In the show all right well there's no yeah there's no reason to believe these guys were anything but Right there's no political stuff we know about them aaron stop no we're not talking about Serious right i said we're not exploring this road i was about to do another et existential Dread well raps just like impugning anyone born in germany in 1946 is like okay that's why i was Moving on i literally am trying to move on now they played a music that people called and this Doesn't i don't think this is appropriate but everywhere i look it's called kraut rock Now listen if i was at the ball game And somebody said hey there's some kraut rock I'd be like that sounds really good it's sauerkraut you can smoke if you smell what i'm Cooking i'm like a hot dog stand come and lick me i taste like a fun dip i'm the sour rock

[1:15:00]Oh no sauerkraut rock okay sauerkraut rock i've lost guys you know what and who knows why This happened why i went down this road and i am lost i can't find my way back I thought we were talking about et now this is their fourth album their early albums were Synthesizers and flutes now did i think about going to find one of the early songs and downloading Listening to it no didn't even cross my mind not gonna do it but they started to go just since Their fourth album is really their biggest album autobahn and you've seen autobahn before in the Big lebowski because that's the one that those guys are making a mockery of they're doing a Parody of the cover the german band and that were just as like autobain they're it's it's exactly like Craftwork but it's like the guys in this movie which is kind of funny that gets it gets up to Number five on the billboard autobahn gets up to number five on the billboard top lps and tapes List which is it sounds like an insane list then they just go start going synthesizers

[1:16:00]At this point they get a fan named david bowie who's introduced to them by brian eno Starts asking like really working with these guys and they think that when brian eno goes on to do The talking heads with you two with all the stuff he's done they think they're he's actually Taking a lot of that from his meetings with craftwork which is kind of interesting and Basically david bowie said hey i want to collaborate with you never happened can you Imagine a david bowie craftwork collaboration i think that would be fun he also asked them To go on tour and open for it never happened that's fascinating i mean or a station to station Album which would be wild if you want to see craftwork and this and then see him doing station To station is the thin white dookie my goodness and basically they got these sequencers so they Could play notes over and over instead of having to play them on a keyboard and this is listed as Along with nirvana dr dray's number one band when you ask dr dray who his biggest influence is he

[1:17:00]Says nirvana his best bands he says nirvana and craftwork and joy division played him before Every concert they say these guys influence obviously daft punk from before bowie you know Devo and i'll just tell you this is gonna make you mad but the article i read said a lot Of people say there's two of the most the two most influential bands of all time are the beatles and Craftwork because you can take those two roads down as we go sacrilege i don't know i don't know Let's get into the album this one is called europa and los and i'm gonna show you a beeping We got beeping We got beeping When this started i was like i can vibe with this i'm good one of the things this album does Is that it loops where we get to the end i'm gonna play it to the beginning again and you're Gonna hear how much this album loops it's crazy that's kind of the concept of this album is it's A loop because it's actually an album about the trans-european train like it's it's literally an

[1:18:00]Album about the train a lot of these songs sound like you're on a train they have a train sound It's crazy that they would make a song about trains but it's a very pro-europe album Because you know when you're in germany in 1947 that you didn't have a lot to be proud of So they would go pro-europe so this sound we're hearing is not a synthesizer it's it's something It's like a it's like a sequencer yeah okay so but i think they're doing it with you know i think A synthesizer can do that sure but yeah the sequencer is different i mean i guess yeah Sequencer is like a little square tablet with some buttons on it how much of your pinky figure Would you cut off if you could just learn like matrix style you learn right away how to use one Of those synthesizers with all the wires going everywhere you know what i mean if you could step In and just use that and everybody'd be like damn this guy knows this old ass synthesizer

[1:19:00]I'd probably give one part of my pinky figure that's what i was thinking too a knuckle Yeah i mean it's like knuckle because you're working that synthesizer with the wires you'd Look cool as hell star oh Can you imagine if you're the one you're married to is way into synthesizers that would be Rough would it honey listen to this song i made okay yeah this one's really pleasant Kind of sounds like a nintendo game song that's what wallace said he said this sounds like video Game music i'm off to fight metal man my son also had this weird pedovi in response to this album Both times i played it in the house he said can you play the loud house movie soundtrack It can be a lot like once he heard this he wanted to hear the loud house movie soundtrack Very bizarre the lot house movie loud house movie it's like a netflix movie very odd that That was the connection in his brain man what do you think of this music I'll kind of the two early for the end but no it's this is exactly lcd sound system

[1:20:00]Talked about it a little bit i've gotten into them recently you know pete from saint paul Listens to lcd sounds and you put on some lcd sound this is exactly it it's just awesome Loopy type stuff and so i love it i think it's great i absolutely think it's one of the most Influential albums after kind of digging into what the tree the coaching tree that came from This album is unbelievable yeah well and you know now craft work is dating a 22 year old So here's the thing i'm not gonna lie to you i'm not gonna lie to you i'm not gonna lie to you Not that and matt you're just you're just talking specifically about the electronic bands because There's a whole hip-hop yeah family tree that we'll get into as well yep you think bill belichick Is good at sex he just can't he could be i could see him being either very bad or really

[1:21:00]Really good you know what i mean or i guess he could be kind of good or he could be kind of bad Or Might just be right in the middle i seem it's all well that's a lot of sex in a nutshell honestly What if you were gonna do dump or marry him his former quarterback tom brady or his former Offensive coordinator charlie weiss now can i say this is this tom brady bill belichick And former assistant coach charlie weiss okay and i'm not stalling because i'm nervous about Answering this in case because i don't know Charlie weiss listens here's the thing am i getting tom brady now or am i getting tom brady When he played football because if i'm getting like skeletor tom brady that he is now i'm i'm That would change my mind which tom brady am i getting how about when he was playing Long hair tom brady okay well that's pretty easy to me i'm gonna you know what

[1:22:00]I might fuck charlie weiss Don't bill belichick and mary Tom brady charlie weiss if you're listening can you man grab a call if you walked into a room And i was just giving it to charlie weiss yeah he's like singing the notre dame fight song Who's that peeking in the door the other door that your bathroom has wait but your bathroom Has two doors oh yeah they had to be open in the middle of the apartment don't ask me about i hate This two-door bathroom i have just double stress but who's looking in this other door oh my god It's wayne fonts Oh that wasn't a question at all yeah well he's stuck in This song is called spiegelstahl now on genius it said So of course i had to look it up in google translate because i was like i bet some german

[1:23:00]Shit on genius.com is awesome and they said it's a song about mirrors and how they influence our Perception of ourselves And i was like that's exactly what i thought i would say is some shit like that where i have To think about it german genius making me think gonna have to sit with them for a while yeah Making me use my coat foot here oh oh you didn't think i know what head was german The album started to lose me here because i don't like something about this guy's voice Really makes me feel comfortable yes this is not a song you would sing to your kids i don't think No now This next song it does sound like he's saying poopin but it's schaufensterpuppen and you know What that means in german a woman at the window mannequins I mean So this is a song about mannequins Come on guys we gotta have a mannequin bit oh come on i mean there's the movie

[1:24:00]You think you'd be a good mannequin like if you were a mannequin that woke up and lived through The night like what would your pose be as a mannequin rob if it was you're the mannequin It would be arms up like this like you know i mean i'm kind of giving them like i'd be like One leg up on like a box like one leg up one leg down kind of fist like chin on the fist type of Thing wow the thinker you know what always depresses me russell yeah is when i'm in the bar Of the store and it's just fat mannequins you know what i mean like where i'm shopping for my clothes It's only the new fat mannequins that are supposed to like make people feel better They probably gotta order those from like a special store like the normal mannequin Store there no way does it do overweight mannequins no i should be you know what i mean like when i See mannequins that look like me i get super depressed yeah mannequins should be super fit

[1:25:00]Period you know what you're a national champion how many sheep had to be shorn to make this Damn shirt oh jesus christ you're wearing wool shirts russell i don't know be careful Be careful cotton now this song is called trans europa express It's literally about the train system this is the lead single off their album Apparently this was getting play at the clubs in new york city and here's the thing you gotta Remember this is 70s This isn't 80s this isn't like this is so early you don't hear anything like this I mean guys listen imagine listening to this what else is coming out in 75 Off this list like cream probably a rolling stone album yeah crosby stills nash and young Yeah i'm trying to think of it so this came on is it 75 or 77

[1:26:00]77 recorded in 75 that's like the height of disco so like yeah was this being played Next to disco tunes or were these different clubs where people want to hear this stuff I can't imagine rumors by fleetwood mac came out in 77 or 77 low by david bowie exodus bob Marley and the wailers marquee moon by television i'll just say this if i went and listened asia The clash there's a lot of good albums listen if i went to a club and they were playing This really joel the music i went to a club and they were playing this music i would not use the Glory hole in the bathroom i'm just gonna say this right now i bet there this would be a this Was a club that glory hole situation would be terrifying yeah you don't know hand by clapton This you don't like metal contraptions or something you know there's a rusty old Can over there russell scratch fever by rob's favorite what album would you want to be hearing My favorite rob what's that situation like what would be an appropriate You know what if i went into a place in the saturday night life or saturday night fever

[1:27:00]Soundtrack was playing I'd feel pretty safe using that glory hole saturday night fever soundtrack came out in 1977 Oh see imagine that hey mom i got two albums at the record store this mill city record store I got saturday night fever and craft work well off to bed listen that song you know who Was sampled by aaron famously hell 1977 are you gonna do africa babada yeah this is africa Babada and supersonic force asia by steely dan planet rock in 77 it's the same drum beat as Trans europa express they sampled it and they use that synth sound too there's like if you there i Think it's called who sampled who i don't know if you guys ever looked at that site and it'll click And it'll pull you to where the sample is in each song on youtube so you can hear it specifically Yeah this song has been sampled like 200 plus times yeah there's multiple song albums songs

[1:28:00]Of this album that have been sampled especially in hip-hop songs hundreds and hundreds of times Yeah i mean i think africa babada was the probably the first to do it and then yeah once he did it Just like every dj in new york was probably looking for this in the bin and chopping And putting together it'd be wild if pete townsend covered teenage wasteland and that would be a real Who sampled who you know what i mean all right metal off metal which of course means in german Metal on metal oh that was a child you can hear it This is a coda to the trans europa express so you're still on that train motif where it sounds Like a train going through melody too right yep it kind of they're all blending together now of Course you might remember the more famous song called metal on metal which was do you know who Sang metal on metal wrestle oh the band anvil of course was a hit documentary about a Heavy metal band that was a one-hit wonder and it followed them on tour it's an awesome music

[1:29:00]Documentary if you haven't seen it it's like a band just trying to make it again When you hear his voice you will find out why anvil did not make it in the business okay i'm Just gonna say it right now man hey do me a favor just to bring this to today's life and because i Do like lcd sounds as much so much would you play dance yourself clean by lcd sound system just a A little bit of it just so everybody can kind of hear where this came from where it goes to Kind of a deal this is cool man i don't think i've ever listened to lcd sound turn it up a little bit Oh yeah you know this is like modern day crap work to me you know this is just awesome so Anybody likes this album listen to some lcd sound system guys i'm not saying anything but if we all

[1:30:00]Decided to get high before this episode this is exactly the kind of music i would want to be Listening to it actually was a really good idea if that happened that'd be a great call All right oh well isn't that's a great song now you know nowadays it's more like l o l e d Sound system o led sound system edit that in rob later but is it really worth it over the q led Oh big difference aaron hit me with that tv knowledge i knew aaron could help himself This fucker loves buying cars and tvs it's his favorite gag he loves that shit It's like the two things and tacos what do you think but you know aaron's Buying tacos like if aaron goes by some tacos you know he's buying it but can you picture aaron being Like yeah i'm way into buying tvs i've bought multiple tvs i cannot see aaron buying multiple Tvs can you see aaron buying multiple cars no no he's gonna get it even if he doesn't buy it he's

[1:31:00]Going to get it even if he doesn't buy it he's going to get it even if he doesn't buy it he's going to Buy it even if he doesn't buy it he's going to get it even if he doesn't buy it he's going to get it even if he doesn't Lie by a car dealership we all know this aaron's too sweet for the car dealership he can't handle It i'm currently leasing just what you did right there is why you can't handle the car dealership Okay you cannot stammer when you're trying to stand up for yourself okay yeah i'm Currently leasing two vehicles you got a great deal on one of them at least yeah aaron you showed Him yeah ford motor company hates to see this guy coming yeah this is anvil metal on metal listen to Just a terrible voice but a great documentary i highly recommend it abzug There's one artist that was really inspired by this band and that's back Wow one of his favorite songs ever is the song absolutely computer from their 1981 album

[1:32:00]Class computer world back heavily influenced by him and i don't know if we can pull it up Rob i don't know if we'll be able to see it if we pull up the music video now for the new Pollution by beck about halfway through the music video there is an homage to this band here craft Work but i think even well yeah i think how they're standing right here russell this looks Like a famous this looks like a very famous picture of craft work under all their album covers So they're in the middle a little further i think Beck can fucking make a video though you can do that somewhere in here there is an homage to Craft work in this video so i gotta say yes russell go ahead when it comes to being inspired By and honoring craft work in their music videos who did it better Incredible thank god we've been back for this podcast

[1:33:00]I'll say it again we could i mean he's literally like the center of the music industry we didn't Realize it until this podcast happened this is a good song too beck's got a lot of good songs You know what i would love aaron beck poster i'm gonna show up early i'm gonna get a beck poster Take it back to your room make sure it yep stays nice yep lay on the hotel bed Gold bond powder oh my god don't even get me started i put the gold bond powder on on this Drip and then i flipped over in bed don't do that big mistake all right next song abzug i don't Think i played abzug yeah you did you played that cool all right sorry about that next up abzug That's nice Now the question that enters rob's brain would that be funny how many times

[1:34:00]No not funny abzug I feel like it's gonna be funny again this is franz schubert Aaron why is this song called franz schubert i am honestly not sure as i was listening today I don't know that i recognize this melody as being from schubert i assume it probably is Somewhere but i i couldn't pick it up listening and i didn't look it up are you gonna tell me No it's because he's here to pump you up no i recognize This isn't like this the exact same song as one of the previous ones I don't know if it's trans europe this sounds the exact same as one of them we already heard Doesn't it well i mean it's the exact same well i maybe it's a motif for us maybe they're just Repeating that speaking of was there any worse video game than cubert i mean speaking of schubert Cubert if i went to a pizza place and the only video game they had was cubert i was so pissed

[1:35:00]Cubert was an all Time shitty video game all time Like can you imagine rob how big of losers we would have been if we were at aaron's halloween Party and i was playing cubert to try to beat it oh my god like dyson's punch out listen punch Out way cooler yeah ladies seeing you playing mike dyson's punch out they're probably creaming Their jeans for sure watch you play cubert the opposite if you told me you knew like the Code to get unlimited Guys in cubert i'd call the authorities wow well russell that makes me want to put up a bench of Symbols above my head classic cubert move that guy loves doing that shit all right I knew i could pull off a cubert bit yes I wonder what he's called that well you know why they call him cubert Is that he looked like a the big the white ball and pool yeah cubert yeah because he always

[1:36:00]You know what he always came in on time during the show that was his cubert Never missed his cubert okay and los this song kind of rips i wrote I mean you hear elo mr blue sky in here for sure i love that song that would be an all-time On russ's 100 song this so and los what they're saying means endless now here's what i'm gonna do This album is going to end this is the end of the album now just listen i'm going to play The first song of the album Which is called europa and los endless europe Now imagine you're sitting at home and somehow the cassette just goes back to the beginning Automatically get one of those nice cassette players Here's the beginning of the album It literally loops

[1:37:00]Same tempo same everything old time road does that too you can listen to this album non-stop For the rest of your life obviously a little non-sexist which is kind of what this podcast Is like if you think about it and i gotta say when i think about things like that It makes me want to phone home because it's an extraterrestrial crisis for sure Listen let's get into the rating system episode 500 the last one ever We'll end with the story about your mom's friend making me carry the flowers and having to sit in The front row of the limo at your wedding and it'll just tie right into that episode it just Loops around for that person that's listening to our podcast on an endless loop i guarantee There'll be one person who does all 500 twice oh that's disgusting that's i got money i believe you

[1:38:00]Oh my god what a sicko oh whoever you are you're the second time you hear listening to me tell you You're sick there's someone find something else someone who's who's listed at like 236 of these Two times they're like oh my god what the fuck is wrong with me and i just say this to this person And i've i've said this before but i'm serious don't stab us Don't do it if i get stabbed by a super fan of this podcast i'm gonna be so pissed What if they're wearing an snm mask what they do it they couldn't see Hey where'd you go Oh got the no eye holes warned i'm gonna warn this to stab this guy i just love this show so Much i feel like we're best friends it's like he's talking to me i also went to st Holoff in the late 90s i relate to every story especially the last episode with john Where it's just mostly saying a lot of stuff i realized when we were editing it anyway This is the rating system okay this album of course now there's a little controversy earlier

[1:39:00]Right transposed to the numbers okay this is 238 not 283 aaron get out that time machine Yeah okay and you know what get into the rosemary machine Okay apparently all the machines are about herbs Get into the rosemary machine Get into the marjoram machine Marjoram god damn aaron picked the funniest one Holy shit I was gonna say mint machine but i didn't want russell to think about those cards you got Graded again Not like my toothpaste not mint what how do we get talking about herbs again Russell trying to go backwards on a conversation like this is almost impossible Nobody could possibly do it except for our super fan What if i wanted to do a herb brooks joke wow You couldn't even set me up what would that okay Russell i gotta i don't have a time machine but i have this herb machine

[1:40:00]i guess i bet it's gonna be a miracle with the herb brooks okay who would get out russell what would that sound like the herbs brooks yeah again you'd start up and it would say again again who do you play for play for the herb brooks machine god damn it you made this a big red machine you know we're gonna get in trouble for this starring kane what was the big red sports machine i was always mystified by that the big red machine was kane and wwf oh okay undertaker's evil older brother the big red machine was the soviet sports program if a matrix if a dominatrix choke slam me that would be pretty cool i mean what if she took you through a table russell maybe you could ask it more of a that's a perfect person to throw you through a table a dominatrix rob they would put you like the boston crab they gotta make you submit

[1:41:00]and you'll never guess what joke i'm about to make me me me yeah after i went to the dominatrix i got a bad case of boston crabs and then you know what holds you but man the bostic pubic lice no that's filthy well i thought they were baked beans so i was eating them like crazy so many boston jokes this episode and rob if you were we didn't even talk about what you were if you were having a dominatrix experience would you yell i submit or would you tap out i i would say my safe word would be like existential you know something that's hard for me to say struggle it'd be like part of the thrill that's not how you say it this is where we rate the album she's forcing me to eat all these boston baked beans little does she know i could do this all night listen this is the rating system we're at 238

[1:42:00]does this album craft work okay because i know what you're thinking what album is almost as good as willie nelson but not quite and of course the answer is craft work trans europa express is this belong at 238 if you think this is perfect this is a rolling well toned if you think this is perfect this is a rolling well toned if you think this is perfect this is a if you think it should not be this high on the list it should be a lower number earlier on the list lower on the list yet higher up that would be a rolling bone it got boned it should be down lower or is this album no good it shouldn't be on the list at all it should be a higher number which is lower on the list that would be a rolling groan new groan alert new groan just dropped okay that's what obama obama would call it grown strike now hey three grown strikes and you're out buddy he must have really been peppering aaron before he tore that groin

[1:43:00]groin strike hey for me i would just work out my minus doctors because your ad doctors are shit i wrote that joke down wrote very good next to it should have done that anyway what do we think rolling well toned rolling bone or rolling groan russell aaron's insane after that throws me off every time russell what do you think i think this is clearly rolling groan this i understand where a lot of musicians are taking something from this or some sort of inspiration but if just taking the album on its own for what it is i don't see how it could be this is a really good album for what it is i don't see how it could be this is a really good album for what it is i don't see how it could be this is a really good album for what it is i don't see how it could be this is a really good album for what it is i'm not coming back to listen to this one again i i could see why i'm glad other people took something from it to help push music for but this one's not for me rolling groan matt what do you think rolling

[1:44:00]well-toned rolling groan or rolling bone again i talk out of both sides of my mouth i this album is more on the influential side for me it's up here because of the influence it has and again an example of the coaching tree that it's got so i think it's i wish i could put it just a little bit higher but i'm gonna say it's rolling well-toned right here at 238 here's what i don't get is when did these guys find time to make those cheese slices you know what i mean the craft [104:36] i guess they must have worked at it the craft singles work trans-europa express aaron what do you think rob rolling well-toned or when did they have a lot of time to make those cheese slices they have time to go get a hand job at a massage bar oh robert craft work and he really did speaking of charlie weiss and all those guys oh my god

[1:45:00]this is my reese is in there please not charlie weiss i hope i get tom brady i think matt and russell both make some great points [105:14] it's hard to overstate the influence of this band they changed a lot of things i know they discovered a lot of things that bands that really love use i don't enjoy listening to this album necessarily so it's tough for me to say in terms of just the music on its merits even though it's impressive for what they did with the technology of the time i'm gonna say rolling ground unfortunately you guys are incorrect this gets a rolling beep and boop oh wait well i'm sorry wait a minute i realize that doesn't work i i need to say something i need to say something i need to say something say that in german this gets a rolling beep tone and boop tone a really boop tone which of course is german for boops and beeps okay because guess what this album has a lot of beep tones and boop tones there's a lot of german boops and beeps in this album all right that's what i noticed biggest

[1:46:00]my biggest disappointment on this album was that i thought craft work was kren craft 5000 and we're gonna hear zombie nation wow you know russell normally every episode i edit out your kren craft 5000 joke but this time we'll bring back the craft court 5000 corner like you've always wanted russell we'll do it god we talk about it all the time next up oh i never checked what the next album is you're about to hear me write this joke live in my head are you ready for this come on rob you can do this everybody's counting on you got this okay funny you're thinking funny next up okay i got this oh i love this movie with coolio jody foster we've got criminal minded by boogie down productions nailed it

[1:47:00]jody foster wait who is it criminal minds it's like that explains why buster keaton wasn't wearing that mask i got those not buster keaton buster rhymes wasn't wearing the mask like dr annabelle lector no wait what i'm confusing jody foster okay here's how that joke worked let me walk you back yeah i confused jody foster and michelle pfeiffer jody foster was in [107:41] silence of the lambs so i said that coolio is wearing the mask okay yeah now you guys will be happy to know that i wrote down some jokes during this episode that i can tell at the end because i had a feeling we would not remember what we had talked about for some reason let's practice your jokes okay let's see what i wrote down i don't remember myself what

[1:48:00]i wrote down but we this is everybody's favorite part of the show it's the jokes at the end by the way it's very funny when you look at the sound files matt turns his microphone off almost five minutes before we do like as soon as we know the music reviews matt's microphone is done there is no more sound coming down the file anything he has to say now will not exist and they're on the record okay oh okay junior mince my balls that would be another candy dominatrix thing junior mince where is that where is the sound it's time to say hey aaron i am gonna have to see a dominatrix before we do that aerosmith album this is the one i had you go back an album for russell this is the joke right i have to go see a

[1:49:00]dominatrix before we do the that aerosmith album because my parody song is going to be hit my sack with a pedal again hit my sack with a pedal again sorry rob i accidentally followed matt's lead and was turning my microphone off so you couldn't hear my laugh on that one i was laughing hard though it's time et phone therapist to work through she's existential i was trying to existential i spent about 20 minutes during the beginning of this podcast trying to get to a joke on like essential mr t somehow like et essential low t you know what yeah vitamin t one of your essential vitamins got you there russell just ask i'm happy to help okay and finally for my last joke of the

[1:50:00]night yes please no aaron turn that shit back on no we're still going hey conductor why don't you pull this baton oh who this of course was marching the marching dice tent hey double reed that reminds me what we did in college oh i'm turning off my microphone too it's a disaster but marching dice is there is a funny bit there we just hadn't found it we didn't find it