Sam Cooke: Live at the Harlem Square Club (1963)

[0:00]Rob, I was going to say, we should start, we should honor the great, one of the great character actors ever, Norm. Norm from Cheers. Cheers. Wow. George went past sway. We got to start with that, right? Yep. Norm! Norm! One of the things they ever did, whenever they had to change out the kegs, they would all stand and they would salute them. Salute the kegs. Stole the valor. Sam Malone would take the old keg out, bring the new keg in, and they would cheer for the new keg coming in. That's pretty funny. Rob, could you imagine if you were dating a woman or married to a woman called Vera? Oh, hot. She's always seemed kind of stern and hot on that show. What a great bit, too. The wife was always calling him at the bar. What a great, that was a great bit. Oh, I was thinking of Kelsey Grammer's wife. That's who I was thinking of. That's not Vera. Vera was, yeah. That's Lilith Stern and Crane. We never met Norm's wife, did we? Did we ever meet Norm's wife? I don't think we ever met Norm's wife, yeah. Listen, I will just say this before we start. Suzanne and I, now, when we walked into, To our Mexican spot, the bartender said,

[1:00]Oh, you guys are here early today. And we were. We were an hour early, and he clocked it. And guess what we're getting now every time? Free tequila shots, Aaron. And it's good tequila. Don't know what kind, but it's good. It's very good. As a greeting or on your way out? On our way out. We are getting the free shot. Listen, I've got a bar where they know my name. It's so great, Russell. Here's a question for you, Rob. I thought I was transitioning. If you get a free shot, no, keep this going. If you get a free shot at a bar, You kind of feel obligated to tip the value Of what the free shot would be anyways? Absolutely. I mean, yes. He definitely does that. 100% Rob does that. No. Why would I do that? But you might be getting the shot after you're already paid. You might be after you've settled up. First of all, that is true. Give me a big enough tip to get a tequila shot. That is true. We tipped before. But second of all, the bartender's not paying for the shot, is he? Probably. Probably not. He's just giving away shots. We've got to pick a different version of this Cheers song.

[2:00]If you're going to pick one with the wrong lyrics and stuff. Well, no, but if you do it with the theme song, Russell, It's going to be like, all you're going to hear is a singing. Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got. We're going to talk over people singing to this? Well, you picked a weird version that wasn't the right version. This is it. What's the second verse, Aaron? When your little angel hung the cat up by his tail. Wait a minute. When your husband wants to be a girl. Wait a minute. When your husband wants to be a girl. When your fiance didn't show. Wait, you're right. I think I could do the whole song. What is this version? The check is in the mail. Yes, Russell. When your little angel hung the cat up by his tail. What the fuck? When your third fiance didn't show. Yeah, it gets dark, man. Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name. Wow. Do you? Do you? Do you? Do you want him to know your name? What's weird is they do know your name.

[3:00]They know your name. But I've been regular at places where I knew they knew my name, But I didn't know their name. Because they see your check. They see your card. They know your name. And you have to ask them their name. And you don't always do that. That's why you've got to pickpocket them. We've talked about barbers before. Matt's got his barber. You know, everyone's got their plate. Right. I've been going to the same spots since I was like seven years old. Guys are getting older. They have never used barbers. I've never used my name once. One time in 40 years, the last two times, the guy has started using my name. So I think he finally knows it and is now repeating it every time. I don't know how to feel about it. I kind of like this anonymity where I came in, got my hair cut, paid him, and left. Right. But now, like, I don't know. That's why I like a cash-only world would be better. This is still a cash-only world for me. I've never used a card in there. Oh. Do they take cards or do they only accept cards? They take a card, but they charge a fee. I figure if they charge a fee, they don't want me to use the card.

[4:00]Right. Absolutely. These lyrics to this song. No, that's the one that's the verse where he says, And your husband wants to be a girl. That's a great song. It's like a very deep... Roll out of bed. Mr. Coffee's dead. You shrink ran off to Europe and didn't even write. Your husband wants to be a girl. Be glad there's one place in the world. This song is crazy to me. You know how sad this song was, Rob. That's like 1983 or whatever. Yeah. All those nights where you got no lights, the check is in the mail. It says no matter what's happening, there's a place for you to go like this podcast. Wow. No matter what's happening in John from Edina's Life, He can listen to this on Tuesday at 6 a.m. When you post it on time. On time. You know, actually, I saw, I went to a Giants game And the running back said, hey, Rob. And I was like, oh my gosh, that was my barber. It was Tiki. In 2020, four friends. I decided to listen to everything. That happened to me, but I was watching Good Morning America.

[5:00]Really? Oh, I thought you met his, I thought you met Rondé. That was your barber. Rob, could you imagine if your twin brother made the NFL Hall of Fame And you didn't? Oh. Like if you were clearly the inferior twin. Yeah. You're twins. Can you imagine? And you made the NFL, but you weren't as good. Wow. You're not even the best version of yourself. You know, who knows my name is, it's the guy who cuts my hair, But he's only two feet tall. It's Marion Barber III, Because he's only a third the size of the other guys. Well, he technically has passed away, So we probably shouldn't make fun of him, but that's okay, Rob. How did he pass away? Cardiac arrest, I think, right? Sort of, yeah. Well, Rob. Thanks. Thanks, Rob, for really taking this to this. This is great. Well, hey, I'm just going to say it in heaven. They got a hell of a football team. They got a hell of a football team. You know what I mean? They got the Pope. They got, were we talking about Rondé Barber?

[6:00]No, Marion Barber III. They've got that guy who did steroids. What's his name? Lou Alzado. Who do you think's got a better football team, heaven or hell? Oh, boy. They've got a couple 2,000-yard rushers. I can just think of them off the top of my head. I don't know. Their rushing game is going to be quite strong. I'm just going to say that. All the Texans that celebrate the music are screaming in order to let us make this podcast. We are far from experts. We promise to do almost no research. All opinions are our own unless you disagree. That would be a great movie idea, like the heaven versus hell NFL promo. I'd watch it, yeah. I'm not going to make. Rob's wayside track. The whole point of the movie is Rob is the coveted free agent for both teams. He's got to decide where does he belong. He's got to make choices. Down here in hell is Jerry Jones's erection.

[7:00]Why did that come down early? What? It's dead to him. Listen, that would be satisfying, wouldn't it, if you found out that Jerry Jones just cannot, No matter how hard he tries, get an erection. You'd be like, okay, you can't have everything he wants. You know what I mean? What do you mean by how hard he tries? Sometimes you really got to try. He thinks super hard. He meditates over it. Yeah, he's focused. He's like sweating from his brow because he's focusing so hard. He's turned the phone on. He's turned the phone on. Do not disturb because he learned that lesson. Oh, tell you that. When you're in the heat of the moment, you get a text. Happy birthday. You know what I mean? By the way, jacking it on your birthday. All time sad, Jackson. You know what I mean? That probably I would say. I don't know. The Jerry Jones one sounds worse. I would say the birthday jack sesh is right up there with the anniversary jack sesh.

[8:00]You know what I mean? Like, it's just like, it's clinical. You got to get the gunk out sometimes clinical. What do you think, Matt? What's what's the worst jack sesh? Well, I think he nailed the head, nailed it on the head there. Yeah. Trying to think this is the worst one. I think New Year's Eve. Everybody's outside counting down. But I will say that counting. Now, you're like, hey, I can do this. I can hit the post. We are up to album 240 from 1985. What about like on the what's it called when you lose the hour? Daylight savings. Oh, yeah. What about on a daylight savings day where you're short an hour? Yeah, I'm still. Yeah, I'm still spending an hour doing that. You're like, I've got to get up in three hours. You know what would help me go to sleep right now? Yeah. Okay. I just got to find the perfect video. Oh, you would think we'd know the perfect video. You can't just write in like yellow.

[9:00]You know what I mean? Like yellow underwear. Being too many times that video. We're moving on to a new one. We got to find a new perfect video. I mean, really, I'm like Roger Ebert when it comes to that stuff. I'm like, no, no, no. Already tell. Don't believe this. The person even sells real estate. We're up to album 240. And from 1985, we've just. Whoa. So, all right. Are you going to get into this later? Right, Rob? What? You're going to get into the, you said 1985. Are you asking if I'm going to jack off after this episode, Aaron? I know. You're going to get into the chronology of this album. It was recorded in 1963. Why did you bring that up? Because you said from 1985, but it was recorded in 1963. It was recorded in 63, Aaron. That's a great point. I forgot you were talking about the album. I thought you were still doing a bit about the worst jack sessions. I would say if you just won the Super Bowl and you're jerking it. Something's gone wrong. You know what I mean? That would be bad. I'm sure it's happened.

[10:00]It's definitely happened. Like any player, like the MVP. Like there's a chance Cooper Cup. Yeah, maybe he might be the MVP, but like he's not guaranteed success after that. Carry Cooper Cup. Yes. Or Jeff Hosteller. Get the fuck out of here. Long snapper. I bet AC Green was like, okay, this is the one day a year is after I win this NBA championship From 1985, but not really. It was recorded in the sixties. We have just the right number of Sam's in the kitchen with one. Oh, Sam cook live from Harlem square club. Now square club. I mean, that sounds like a putter to me. The squares club. I've got three guys here who went into a club and they thought it was cool, but it also Turned out to be a square club. I used the joke twice. I've got Aaron and no, I've got Russell in Minneapolis. Russell, how are you doing? Square club. Bring it on home to me, Rob. Wow. Russell. I wish I could, but I don't think I've ever been invited to your home. Actually, you have, you chose not to come.

[11:00]My wife's plane was late or some bullshit. I can't remember what it was. This was the one where not only did Rob not come when he found out his wife's plane was Late, he turned around and drove home and then came later. Nice. Oh yeah, I did. I went back to the cabin. It takes a lot to get rubbed. Leave that cabin. That does sound like I want to leave that cabin, by the way. So the guy today who sent the 99 days until September 1st text, go fuck yourself. Okay. It's actually not funny to joke about the short summer. The summer is very short. It's Memorial Day weekend. You know what the next holiday is, Aaron? Labor Day. Oh, 4th of July. Oh, 4th of July. That's right. What? In my mind, it's Labor Day. We're jumping right to the end of the summer. To be fair, if you are a teacher, July 4th is kind of a letdown because everyone gets That day off. Everyone's just like you. Yeah, it does kind of piss me off. You're right. Everybody's having a summer, wouldn't it? Yeah. They're like, oh, I'm at the cabin for the summer. No, you're not.

[12:00]No, you're not. I'm at the cabin for the summer. I bought shoes here. You know what I mean? Like, I have to find a barber in the area. I'm at the cabin for the summer. I worked hard to get these step and ladder raises, and I don't like that you get this Day off like I do. I've got Matt in Minneapolis. Matt, how are you doing? Good, Rob. Just over here dancing with the chicks and slacks. Wow. Progressive. Right. It is pretty hot. Got to admit, chicks and a nice pair of slacks. Yeah. Sign me up. And I've got Aaron out in California. Now, Aaron was recently at a restaurant, and he said, sir, I'll have another fruit juice And salad. Oh, God damn it. Aaron said, I'll have another fruit salad and juice. I want more of that fruit salad with the juice. And the guy goes, it's sangria, sir. Sangria. What? Rob, you're the apple of my eye. Hi, you're cherry pie, you're cake and ice cream. Let's talk. I'm super stoked to talk about this album, guys.

[13:00]This is like church. This is like the sound of people having sex. I am ready to talk about this album. This album makes me think about the country's broken prison system with chain gangs. All right. Let's get started. Okay. Oh, Aaron's giving me a thumbs up. He likes chain gangs. Chain gang. You know what I should do is I should turn. On the radio and see if that song randomly comes on or to see if there's another song That comes on, which is also as good as last week's song. I would say, here we go. What's up, everybody? Welcome to K-Rob, K-R-O-B. Sometimes your PSAs are just P-O-S-S. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. Russell has some cards he saved. He can't wait to see their grades. It's got to be at least an eight. So he sends it to PSA. Uh-oh. And then he gets the letter back. Uh-oh. It feels like a kick in the sack. Turns out they are not worth jack.

[14:00]He doesn't even have an eight. He thought they were pristine. Pristine. Yeah, Russell thought his cards were great. There's misprinting and they're missing. Now they're worth less than the case. Oh. He's got a David Robinson. Scotty Pippen from Portland. He's got three John Stucktons. But they all suck. They all get a failing grade. Is Jay a writer's total shit? Garnet Rookie's below average. Is AC Green really fucked him? According to PSA. He's insisting that. Hey, these cards must be great. His collections in the trash bins. Because they got a shitty grade. Yeah. Yeah. When you want to hear about. Wow. Man, when that was about PSAs, I thought it was for sure full of Joe Biden jokes. But it held off.

[15:00]Hey, Russell, just sold a Pokemon card. 360 bucks. Nice. Oh. 360 bucks? That's lucrative. Oh, my God. That's one buck for every degree of my Microsoft office. Beck did it better. That's a buck a degree. I wish they had Microsoft Access. I remember I took a class once. They were like, we're going to show you guys How to use Microsoft Access. I was like, no, you're not. Because I'm not listening to this shit. I don't know what Access says. They're like, it makes databases. I was like, oh, that's something I'm never going to use. Fuck off. Microsoft Access is shit. That was a deep cut for my Microsoft 97 heads out there. Office 97 heads. Listen, okay, this is Beck did it better. I always pictured you as more of a Microsoft Works guy, Rob. That's so fucked. That is so fucked that you would say that. And you know I did at Microsoft Works when we first got a computer. Yeah, I could see it. Because it was slightly cheaper. My parents were like, you don't need Microsoft Word. Yeah, I love saving it as a WRK document, a.WRK.

[16:00]Everybody knows what to do with that. Fuckin' A. It's like when I open up a Mac and Keynote comes up. I was like, I could get out of this with this shit. Who's using Keynote? Hey, Steve Jobs ass, he's in Keynote. Numbers. Fuck that, ugh. Donut face looking ass. So here's the deal. Where was I? I got the three guys. I introduced you, right? Yeah, you got some ass. Yeah, hit the voicemail. Let's get to the voicemail, why not? Now listen. Unfortunately, we have none. We have none. So I have to go- No freaks. I hate to do this, but I am going to my personal text messages, okay? I am going to my personal text messages. I got- There's a lot of risk with these up here. I just wanna show you- Yeah, right? How many text messages I got about duck penises. My sister went crazy the other day, about four episodes ago. We were talking about duck penises. My sister went crazy. As you can see, She said call me, funny emergency. That emergency was she had looked up duck penises online and Wanted me to see what they look like, okay?

[17:00]Now it turns out male duck penises are two things. They're very long, nice, and they're corkscrew. Not sure, I'm gonna say nice after that kind of is scary. Look at what a duck penis looks like compared to the duck. Here's the duck. Well, I feel very inadequate after seeing that. How long is that penis compared to the duck, Russell? How would you describe that? Probably 1.25, the length of the duck. It's an incredibly long corkscrew penis. It looks like what it looks like? The woman's fingernails from the Guinness, and I hate to bring this up again. The Guinness Book of World Records. The fingernails look like the duck's penis. Now it turns out- That there's two fat guys on this bike. They're like, we'll never be able to hug each other. It's our secret shame. You gotta go into our normal bits. After a few months, the penises of a duck will retract. And then the next year, they will grow different sizes based on male competition.

[18:00]The more ducks, the smaller the penises, I think. That doesn't make sense to me, I don't know why that is. I would think it's probably- They can also get something called The duck plague, where the penis is permanently prolapsed. Now, I can't even picture what that means, a prolapsed penis. But I'll tell you what, right now- I can't either. It sounds bad, that's one area. I don't wanna go pro-ing, it's my lapsed penis. Hey, my lapsed penis can stay amateur as long as it wants. I want it to be the Olympics. You think it gives them a complex, like they're swimming around and They're like, all the people in this park know I have a prolapsed duck's penis? Yeah. Hey, mom, can we give extra corn to that duck with a prolapsed penis? They're talking about me. Don't give that bread to the prolapsed penis duck. Something about putting it on its bill. But this doesn't make sense with a prolapsed penis. If it went to Turkey and got a bigger penis, you could put it on its bill. So apparently, the duck's penis, this is what we've been talking about. So this is the voicemail. Now listen- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[19:00]This is what you've been talking about. With my sister. Well, I have to say, you can see how many responses I had to her. There was like one. I said, I think I'm going to be sick, it's longer than I thought, so. Very excited stuff going on. So what you're saying is she's the sick one, that's what you're saying there. She wanted to talk to me a lot about duck penises, a lot more. She wanted to talk to me a lot about duck penises, a lot more than I wanted to. And it was just something I mentioned, and then I did say to her, can you please leave A voicemail? And she didn't. So that's just like a lot of my fans of this podcast, not leaving a voicemail. It's time to see what everybody's up to. It's time for Roll It. Aaron, what's the worst thing that's happened to your penis? Oh, yeah. I'll tell you mine, I can tell you mine right now. I got caught in a drain when I was getting bathed when I was younger. And? Well, I don't know, my mom said when she tried to pull me out of the sink, like my penis Was going in like I was like it was a ghoulie, I was kind of a ghoulie situation.

[20:00]The self-destruction music, I can't do this. I don't do this, I can't do it. No, everything's going perfect with your guys' penises. I can't do penis injury talk, I'm out, I'm out. It wasn't an injury. I don't remember it. Why don't we get here? I remember once I did get a zit on my daft. Oh, we gotta, we have to move on. I can't. I was like, this is bad. It's too much. Can we turn that timer back on? The timer's gonna go back on if this is what we're doing. Okay, fine. You guys don't have any, I'm just last call for penis stories. Nobody. Okay. Next thing on my cart. What's the best thing that's ever happened to your guys' penis? Aaron, rolling, going, I was going with you. It's going great. Yeah. I, once again, it's Memorial Day weekend, so we've got a long weekend of fun and exciting Things. Tomorrow is a trip to Six Flags. Whoa. Wow. Wow.

[21:00]On Memorial Day weekend. On Memorial Day weekend, we're going to Six Flags. Aaron loves yelling at us. Did you buy the Fast Pass or whatever it is that you can, jump lines? I don't know if you can. We bought a membership. Oh. I don't know if you can, I don't know if there's a jump line option or not. If we, if there did, I hope we bought it. I'm looking forward to the Batman roller coaster. But I think Six Flags is like serious roller coasters, right? Like this is not, like we were just at Legoland. I don't think that's going to be anything. This isn't your grandpa's roller coaster. Aaron, have you found yourself being more apt to ride roller coasters as you get older Or less apt to ride them? I think I'm equally apt, but I'm still a little bit nervous. I'm going downhill fast. Like I have zero desire. I've heard that from people. To go on some of these big rides anymore. Okay. Because I've heard that from people as we get older. And so far, like when we went to Disney, I felt good about it. But I don't know. Like this is different. Like Disney has enough like other shit going on. This feels like we're going up there. It's like an hour drive. We're just riding rides.

[22:00]And I, yeah, I'm not sure. I'm not sure I'm going to hang for a whole day. Did you lease a new car just for the new, for the ride up? No, I'm just going to stick with the regular. Yeah. I'm just going to stick with the one I got. Yeah. And that didn't, that couldn't need another one for this. I got to ask you on a daily basis. I got to ask you on a day like this. What is the food situation? How are you guys packing ahead? Are you packing a breakfast to eat in the car? Maybe a lunch? You go out to the parking lot and have. Actually, here's what's interesting. What are we doing? I'm glad you asked. We're going with some friends who are very frugal. Thank you. And our friends are packing lunches. Oh, the cheap friends. We're packing some lunches. And we were a little bit up in the air about what to do exactly. But here's what happened. Tonight, we went out to Lovely's in downtown Oakland, which used to have the best burger In Oakland, but now they've opened a second location. Where's that at? Oh, it's a, it's an interesting spot. It's on Webster, but it's right where Webster comes off of Broadway, right at the left of The farmer's park. Between 23rd and 24th, you turn left at the AU lounge and then you got to circle Around for parking because it's not easy. Drop the family off and then you park.

[23:00]You let them go. And then go park. Yeah. Sometimes. Yeah. Well what else is next to Webster's? Family ties. Right. So we're at Lovely's, which used to have the best burger in Oakland, but they've opened A second location in the city. And I don't, I think they've fallen off since they've expanded. But tonight my son said, I don't want a burger. So, okay, well we'll get you the fish and chips. Oh, they're sold out of fish and chips. So then I got to figure out what he wants. So I said, oh, I can get you a fried chicken sandwich and just get it totally plain. And he's like, that's fine. Let's do that. So I go up to the counter. I ordered the fried chicken sandwich. I said, can you do it? Cause the burgers will do plain Jane. So just ketchup only. So I was like, can you do a fried chicken sandwich, but do it like plain Jane style? Nothing on it. Guy goes, yeah. Cause it's supposed to come with like slaw and pickles and sauce. You know, it's like all the stuff kids hate. Yeah. And the guy goes, yeah, we can do that. He says, are you sure you don't, Matt, go ahead. I, I always have the facts of life next to Webster for some reason. Do you guys have that? I don't know. I always thought it was the facts of life with Blair and Tootie and all of them. Yeah.

[24:00]Yep. You hit that and then you'd start to get real old. Sometimes you'd see like an old Dallas or something. You're like, oh, this show is too old. I'm not, this is a too old show. I'm not watching this. It's a vacation, right? I wasn't watching it. I wasn't popping a wheelie on the Zeitgeist with that one. I feel like. Ma'am. Ma'am. Didn't he have ma'am. Wow. Russell coming in hot with his Webster impression. He's tried to fit that into every episode we've done it. I've had to edit it out. Is that guy, the actor, still alive? No. I don't think so. He, he fell into a hole. He was so small that he fell into a hole before we ever saw him again. He prolapsed into that hole. Oh. It was a prolapsed Webster. Yeah. Ma'am. I prolapsed. Ma'am. Okay. Webster dead. Question mark. Emmanuel Lewis born 1971. Guys, he is not that much older than us. Okay. He's 10 years. He's 10 years old. And, yeah, he is alive. He lives in New York city, Rob. Go to images. Are there any recent images of him? Okay. Let's see. If I met a 54 year old Webster, it would fucking break my brain. I would be like, I'm going to go to New York City. I'm going to go to New York City. I'm going to go to New York City.

[25:00]I'm going to go to New York City. I'm going to go to New York City. I'm going to go to New York City. You know what I mean? Like just picture right now. Old Webster. You can't do it. Webster is not old. Emmanuel Lewis. Images. Emmanuel Lewis. Not right then. Webster. Now. Okay. Let's see what Webster looks like now. Go to that one. Go up a little bit. There's. Oh, here we go. 2024. You know why? This guy. I just. You know why? I just. You know why? I just. You know why? I just. I just. I just. I just. He looks like he's young still. He still looks young. He's thriving. I would say he's thriving. Ma'am. Wow. Wow. Webster is aging, but it is like dog years. It's like reverse dog years. You know what I mean? Like every year is. Is it a George Papadopoulos? Mr. Papadopoulos. Yes. Steward or whatever you want to call it. Yeah, he was a ward. It was a Robin situation. He was a ward of the state. He was not.

[26:00]Well, was he a butler? No. I think she's the one with the butler. Facts of life. What am I thinking? That's Mr. Belvedere. Mr. Belvedere. Because that, of course, is a famous story where Mr. Belvedere famously sat on his testicle. That's one of the most famous stories about Mr. Belvedere. We can't no more injuries. Mr. Belvedere looking up famously sat on his testicle. So if you'll recall, Rob wanted to know what my lunch situation is for Six Flags tomorrow. And what happened is I went to order the plain fried chicken sandwich. And I said, I just want it plain as possible. And the guy said, are you sure you don't want any ranch on there? And I was like, yeah, throw the ranch. And then I bring it back to the table. And my son says, I hate ranch. And also, they doused in the ranch. I don't know what the hell happened. You deserve every bit of that. Aaron, what are you doing? Why would you say yes? Get it on the side. I already bought a back. I should have got it on the side. You're right, Matt. But I had already bought a backup burger. So he ate the burger. I got the fish sandwich. And now I got a fried chicken sandwich to take with me for lunch tomorrow. So I'm set. Backup burger.

[27:00]That's like when I was a student. I was a green punter for the Vikings. That's how it's really going with me. How's it really going with Matt? Who took my spot? It was Mitch Berger. Good. I got a wedding to go to. Oh, God. A couple days, a wedding to go to. That sounds like the most fun thing you could possibly do. Doesn't it? Do I have wedding music on here? Canon and D, maybe? I don't know. Hey, now you're talking my language, man. More like Canon and double D. Pretty sure I made that joke last time we had this conversation, by the way. Canon in D. I actually have to, I'm actually in the wedding. Oh, wow. It just, it feels very weird to be in your 40s and be in the wedding. But can you guys think of anything more fun to be like surprised and all of a sudden just be in a wedding when you're in your 40s? Like never thinking you're ever going to be at a wedding ever again? Just sounds like fun. Can't think of anything more fun. Yeah. So I have to write a speech. Wow. The guy's son is technically the best man.

[28:00]He's 11 year old. 11 or 12 year old son, which is a good move. But I've tried to, I've tried a speech. So just wondered if you guys got any tips for writing a best man speech. I'm going to say this. You cannot get out funnied by the maid of honor. It absolutely cannot happen. You cannot go down in flames compared to her. I would, you got to go funny, man. I know people are going to disagree with me. I'm going to go funny. Outright. Disagree with Rob and say, don't be afraid to be unfunny. That's kind of what I entirely fine to be not funny and be pleasant and enjoyable. And I had people say, oh, that was a very nice speech. And that'd be it. But going for funny and crashing and burning. Ooh, that can be tough. Yeah. I'm just going to say like the old playgrounds. Let's go for a big swing. You know what I mean? We want something huge, man. We got to go. We got to. Here's what you're going to do. Mass three rules.

[29:00]Hit him with something. Funny, serious at the end. Everybody thinks it's a great speech. It's a great setup. Mass three rules of marriage. Rule number one. You know, always do the dishes or whatever. The speech is already, it's right itself. It's itself. The only thing I was going to bring up is that it's weird to talk about your friends in front of a bunch of people and not being a funeral at our age kind of a deal. So I'm kidding. Jesus. No, man. No. No. I love where this is going, man. You're going to flip it on its head. I'm trying to make it awkward. I'm trying to make it. You guys will appreciate this. I was the best man at my brother's wedding. This has got to be, I don't know, 12 years ago, maybe 10, 10 at least. And I gave the best man. I may still have it memorized in my head somewhere. Like I could probably pull out the whole file. I actually used a music thing. And at the end of it, so Matt, I think the key is you're allowed three jokes.

[30:00]They've got to be quick. Yeah. You got to introduce yourself, rip on the groom, make a few jokes About him, then say a good thing about the groom and the bride or whoever's getting married About the couple. And then I think you got to leave people with a feel good quote or a feel good moment at The end. When you walk off, everyone thinks that guy's awesome. You got to say something nice to leave it at the end. But I actually had a music quote from a composer and my quote was because I had talked about How my brother and his wife were friends before they started. They were dating and got married. And I said, the composer, Fran Schubert once said, happy as a man who finds his wife After the truly happy man is something about who finds his wife and his best friend Or something like there's some sort of line, but you got to leave people with a positive Thing that cannot, I don't think you end on a joke. I think you have to end on something nice. Listen, I agree with Russell, but here's what I would say. Have you ever done that thing where you put your thumb out your fly?

[31:00]I think that's a great closer. I would say go with the long belt and you loop it through there. You guys keep going. My dog's barking. Yeah. Oh my gosh. His dogs are barking. He's not talking about his gout for once. No. All right. Well, my, my plan is to keep it short. Keep it sweet. Cause nobody wants a long talk, long talker at the, so when you say short and Sweet, what is your goal? I think keep it under like right around four or five minutes. I don't know. I think if you hit five, you are border on people. I think so too. I think so too. So yeah, no, I know, but he can't, but I can't go, I can't just go real short. I mean, it can't be like, Hey, no, you're right. You're right. It's a, it's a fine line. I think you're, you're thinking about it, right? Well, I know you're going to do a great job, man. I use strike me as a person who just gives good speeches. Have you ever bombed a speech? I don't, I don't give too many, but like last, like really kind of touching.

[32:00]I had to give a eulogy. I like, I took a eulogy at my grandma's funeral, right? Something like that. And it took a long time to make sure that you're saying the right thing about someone You love like that. Right. So I don't know. When you did that, Matt, were you kind of elected by your family to talk on behalf of Your family or how did that work? A little bit of, and a little bit of us, nobody, I don't know. And I'm the oldest grandchild too, things like that, on that one. So it was a little bit of, nope. I knew some people weren't going to do it and I just knew that somebody had to say something. So I, I did. I did volunteer a little bit and everybody was like, oh yeah, go ahead. What I think is strange, Matt, is during that eulogy, you did the normally We're here gathered for weddings, but like you just, you use the opposite. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. That's good. Actually, I did find that quote. If I can get it right for you guys, Ron Schubert, happy is the man who finds a true friend and Far happier is he who finds that true friend in his dominatrix. Oh, I was going to say, what is a quote for you finding your true love on

[33:00]The internet? What is that? I can you be friends with your dominatrix? I think that kind of spoils it, right? Feels like what I mean? Crossing a line. Yeah. You need to keep some professional distance. Yeah. Hey, you want to finish this? These Oreos I'm eating. What? You're my dominatrix. This is the opposite. Russell, rolling going. How's it going with you? Rolling going. I mean, you guys didn't want to hear sports last week. I want to talk sports this week, but it's not Timberwolves. If this is youth sports, it's not Timberwolves. I know Aaron's been getting his coaching out there. He needs to use the team that you've coached before. Matt was like almost a professional. Matt was a professional coach, a paid coach, I should say. Yeah. I saw a video of Eddie's swing. You got him doing the each row, slap it from the left side. I have him while he's from the left side and I've got no step. And the other coaches are not understanding what I'm trying to do. And it's driving me. He's only nine. He doesn't need to step. Yeah. No step because he doesn't need to step.

[34:00]Yeah. No step. He just needs a low. He just needs to load and go. So, cause I don't care about this year. I care about a few years down the road. So the future, but coach Mike, great guy, but I've had to have a couple of talks. I'm like, Mike, he's not going to step. Mike. Yeah. You're trying to get these kids to do American bad flips. We're, we're doing fucking Korean bad flips. You know that. Yep. Yeah. Hands up high. Big flick. Matt playing for the long game. Sorry. So last week I went and watched my niece play softball and it was a lot of fun. It was cool to watch her play, but there was a weird coaching thing. I've never seen this before and their coach I thought was fantastic. Super positive. You could tell she was helping them get better, but also making sure people were having fun. I would say so good balance, but in softball at like a 10, nine, 10 year old, there are A lot of, shall we say past balls and people stealing bases there. There are no balls hidden play.

[35:00]Like over two games. I watched, I think there were three balls in play. Everything else was just, every pitch was a pass ball and every pitch was a stolen base. And then it was just running the bases. It's like playing RBI baseball against your younger brother. You know what I mean? Like where they just sucked it. Like you're just running the bases and they don't know how to throw it. Oh, like playing your parents. So video game, just kicking their ass. I've got my lawn chair on the baseline. I'm sitting there and my sisters talk with me. And we notice whenever a girl runs up to third base, it makes the third base. They sound like a pass ball or a steal or whatever. They're standing there. The coach reaches into her pocket and hands them something. They pop it in their mouth. Wow. So at once I was like, what's going on? What's going on? I love dogs. Yeah. So, yes. So eventually we, like, we've asked my niece cause she made it to third base. We're like, what is she giving you guys? And she turns out she was digging into her pocket and giving them sort of like Nerds, like nerd questions. I was like, is this is what coaches do?

[36:00]I would have been buried bonds. You're they're about to run home and you're like, Hey, stuff, this candy in your mouth Before you run home. And they have to slide. They are literally going to be sliding at home plate within eight seconds of receiving The nerds. Well, is this bad? What is this a coaching move? All I know is this is my dad comes to Eddie's games and he just drives him bonkers. Cause you know, he comes from the old school. Like, Hey, you run in, you run out, you grab everybody's got their stuff and You do your own stuff. And it does not. And I can tell you that anybody who's trying to do anything from like from the 1900s is Just, they're just an uphill battle to do anything. And so I think this is brilliant Russell, because you got to find a way to Get them over there. And the only way to get them to second and third to like steal property is like, you Need to want to steal and you need to want to get over here. I'm going to give you a nerd cluster when you get over here.

[37:00]So get over here as fast as you can. Because. You know, you're going to score if they get to third base on a pass ball. So. I love it. Yeah. I know what so many kids just play sports because their parents want them to. They're going to hate it. I'm telling you, if I had a coach who was like, you get to third base, you get a nerd Cluster. Yep. I would have been fucking Jose Canseco out there. I would have been hitting just absolute club bombs, except I wouldn't be going home. I would just go to third. Nerd clusters are so good. You'd be like Christian Guzman leading the league in triples. Oh, I would. I would be. Oh my God. I'd be like Bojax. I'd be running up that wall. So I will say this. It was fun to watch. I do have a couple of complaints. All right. One. I feel like coaches are doing things wrong. If you were playing a sport where kids are pitching and there is zero balls going and Play over two games, kids shouldn't be pitched. Something is wrong. You should not have a kid, a youth sport where it is a four person sport and 10 people are Standing around. For two, for an hour and a half. It doesn't make sense.

[38:00]The league, God's country's little league last year. It was like the first year of pitch. We're in St. Louis park this year because it was the school stuff. But they would have it where the kids are pitching, right? And so you'd get a real count. So if it was three in one and then it was ball four, the coach could come out and then Do soft toss. And you had two more strikes for soft toss. So that at least the ball is put in place and the defense can go. And then the, The kids they're going to strike out, they can strike out, but if not, they Can Matt, that's, you're right. That's what my sister said. They did the year before. And so this year is the first year where the coach is not coming in. If they're, if the count sounds like a year early, cause Eddie's plays, he's going to Be, he's like 10 and 11 year olds. It's kind of like a, I don't know, like a catch here. It's not the oldest of the little league, but it's like one level down kind of a thing. And they're putting the ball in play and they're making outs and everything this year. So I'm guessing by next year, your niece, We plan some like real softball.

[39:00]If that makes sense. I sure. I am so glad my kids do not play any kind of like baseball type sports. That to me is like, there's so many games. They're all over the place. Oh, I'm going to get going on this. You got to practice hitting with them. You got to practice catching with them. You got to go. It's the most boring thing to watch. I, what do you think would be the sport you'd least want your kid to be In? It's like right now, like my one is doing volleyball. It's great. I go games for like five minutes. Everybody's. They're bouncing around there. You know what? I was talking with my sister about this though. She doesn't want to watch volleyball because then you're sitting on bleachers in an indoor Stadium. She said she would much rather sit outside in the lawn chair than sit inside on the bleachers. It is true. When you're, I think swimming is the bad one, right? I don't know. Yes. Well, it depends if you're one thing. The other good thing about like baseball at this level or whatever is that like, and I Don't know if it's for softball. I don't know if you got this Aaron. There is no run rule, but there's Mercy rules. So if you're up by 15 games over by 10 things like that, and you can't start

[40:00]A new inning after like an hour 45 it's going to be a two hour game Or less kind of a thing, which is perfect. You just don't want like the three hour 30 to 20. Yeah. Ours are 90 minutes. You can't start. Here's the question I had for you. And this is going to go out to my, my good buddy, Neil from Lakeville, who I think organizes Sports tournaments and stuff like I've got a major problem with adults right now. This. So to me, so my niece plays and I don't know if it's what type of how competitive, what Level it, but like they traveled to tournaments and stuff like that. It's a travel team. Yeah. It's a, so they're, they're in this tournament and they are playing five games on a Saturday. First game is at 8. Wow. But is it just Saturday? Hold on seven games over two days with Saturday, a game at 8. A second game at 12. 40. So you've got a huge, big gap.

[41:00]You know, that reminds me when I went to the mall. Well, they had a big gap there. It was huge by the, it was right by the old Navy. Huge gap. That's like when we went to that house of ill repute. Oh, oh, that's okay to say it's a little slayer than what you do. Finish your thing. And I'm going to tell you what Neil from Lake. So then. And so then there is, so there's like a three hour window of no games in the morning after An 8:00 AM game, two games in a row in the middle. And then they've got like another three hour window. Their last game is at 8:00 PM. So if you are a parent, you are there from literally 7:30 to nine at night. Like, what are we doing? This seems crazy. I wouldn't be there because I'd be in the parking lot and you'd see my car. Cause it'd be the one with the hose going into the window. That's all. I'd be in there smiling. My brain's out. Cause I'm not watching baseball with kids over 12 hours where I see like four games.

[42:00]That's terrible. I had a buddy who bought an RV so that he could bring it to these tournaments And just have a spot. Tony from Bloomington. Good dude. I, we need Neil to call in cause I swear Neil, he can, he, he, he was more on the basketball Side planning these things. And they would say that they were a good team and they would go to these other tournaments And they would purposely give them like the Friday at noon, which would be the Very first game. Right. You know, so they would make them travel way earlier than anybody else. So all the parents had to get off. It would make the good team, which would be his team come early to this tournament And then they wouldn't let them play until noon the next day. So they're just purposely effing with them on the schedule just to try to get An advantage over it. So who are the parents that says, let's say these 10 year olds need to be playing From seven in the morning till nine at night. That's crazy. Yeah. I mean, could you, and you guys are parents of kids, like kids who play sports, this has

[43:00]To be a life ruiner, right? Like even if your kid is having the most fun, that is literally all day for a whole week. Yeah, but it is. And it isn't right because the game for the kids is a kind of a minor part of it. It's everything else around hanging out with the kids and playing at the park and socializing Seeds and yeah, doing their tick tock dances or whatever they do, things like that. But no, it's, yeah trying to figure out what else. You're going to do with your kid for the rest of the weekend. Isn't that easy either? And it gets easier as you get older, right? So like Eddie's finally at two years ago it would have been horrible. Now he's finally at a spot where you can let them go run and do whatever, but It also ends really quick, Russell like in three or four years it could Just be all done. Right. Right. And then, but part of why it ends quick for people is because I don't think they make It fun. Yeah. I think they're like, we're going to make this as painful as possible, except for like The three kids were the bet. Like the other kids out there. They're just standing there for 10 hours. Cause you're saying it's all straight.

[44:00]Cause it's all strikeouts. Russell. Is that what you're saying? Yes. Yes. It's either. No, it's shouldn't say it's all strikeouts. It's usually all walks and pass balls. And, but there's some kids that are very skilled and everything. Balls get hit and play. My niece fouled off a hard one. That was like a good line draft. It was fun to watch and everything, but yeah, man, I was thinking that's way too long of A day there. The parents and the coaches running these tournaments need to look in the mirror. You got something wrong with you. My opinion. I will just say, I've been pleasantly surprised. We were, we'll throw names out there. We were at Richfield. It was really weird. It was really like competitive with not competitive kids and it was like dumb how they Were doing things. And then we switched over to St. Louis park because of school stuff and it's great. So I think it is, depends on who's running these things, Russell, and you know, if you've Got good people that are have half a brain to kind of control some of this Stuff. That can be a positive thing, but yeah, playing, being at the ballpark at seven

[45:00]And then leaving at nine is that's, that's crazy. So here's my other question, Matt, as a youth coach and area, your coach could do, you could Tell me your guys' thoughts. If you're watching it, a level of kids where they're not ever hitting the ball, are you Still telling him to take a strike? No. Or should they be cutting it? Everything? I think they should be swinging at every, we buy, I buy candy for kids who swing At three pitches. They strike out, but they go down swinging three pitch swing. Yep. Buying candy for that kid. I had so many issues with my co-coaches this year. I mean, our kids are seven and eight and so they're just getting, that's pretty good pitching. And yeah, so it was a mix of coach pitching kid pitch. And so it was like, well, as soon as the kids started pitching, I had these coaches with Me who were like sending the kids up to the plate, telling them like only swing of it's A good, only swing of it's a strike, only swing of it's close. Get a good pitch to hit. Like, I don't know what the hell you're, they can't. Yeah. I mean, get up there and swing the bat. That's too much for them to process. Swing away. Rip bombs.

[46:00]Who's telling kids not to hit bombs? Like it's right. It's like, okay, we're going to call a bunt on this play. Get out of here with that. Like just, we're, we're here to see dingers. What are we doing? Get out of here. Robert only going. How's it going with you? Listen, I have been so strong and we have not talked about P Diddy once, even though This is a music podcast. Okay. And this is probably the biggest music news that's happening, but I saw disturbing news. I'm out of the trial, the P Diddy trial, and I have to bring it up with you guys because I feel like this is something we need to discuss. It has come to my attention that P Diddy, when he got burgers, he would put applesauce On top of it. Oh, he is putting applesauce as a topping on the burgers. Even Aaron is giving me a face of disgust. Why wouldn't it be good? It seems intriguing. I mean, no, I'm not, I'm only thinking about like, this is, he would go get takeout burger. And then bring it back to the freak off and then put the applesauce on.

[47:00]I wasn't even talking about the freak off. That was part of my, you thought that's what I was going to talk about. Go to a restaurant and be like, oh, I'll have the applesauce too. Like this is like, he was adding it later at that point. The burger's cold. Why? No, Aaron, it's, it's not about how this physically is made. This burger. Wouldn't you rather have the burger just a little bit? I mean, I'd rather have it just a little bit room temperature. Cooled off a little. Yeah. Cause I think, I don't, I think I don't want like the dichotomy. Of having the really hot burger and the colder applesauce. I'll tell you what guys, warm applesauce is this isn't it? It is very good. My dad makes applesauce. He makes the best applesauce at home. I bet your dad should try it. Your dad should try his homemade applesauce on a burger. I bet that'd be good. You know what? His applesauce would be good and it's delicious. And you know what? You know what I am? I'm a mush head. That was a applesauce is a mush head delight because I could see apple butter on a burger. Okay. That would work for me. And a little sweetness on a burger. Nothing wrong with it. Here's the, here's the key.

[48:00]I think for the applesauce burger, it has to be a hamburger. No cheese. I think if it's a cheeseburger, you got applesauce on there. That's a problem. Yeah. I do too. Well what? Bacon and apple and burger. It's just like a jam. It looks like they do jam type burgers at places all the time. Right? You should play that song, Rob. But while we're talking about this, Michael. I agree. This song is so good. Now listen, can I tell you that one of my kids at school? We're doing something where they're acting like they're dunking a basketball. I played this song and it got absolutely no recognition for us. They did not know the song jam. They had never heard it before. Oh no, the children. Yeah. I think he's going to be phased out. I think the kids are not going to know. You can not phase out Michael Jackson. Yeah, you can. Yeah, you can. He phased himself out. Yeah, you can. No. Thriller's always going to be there. Billie Jean's always going to be there. I don't know, man. I'm telling you. I don't want to go by the wayside. Now. Phil Spector's still out there. Phil Spector's still out there. Phil Spector's still. Oh, wait. Nobody talks about Phil Spector. Not so much. Yeah.

[49:00]Cheers. My Gary Glitter's greatest hit CD is so short. It's just, it's just rock and roll part two, mostly. Here's the thing. I have been, every weekend, taking red onions and pickling them for the week and getting Pickled onions. All, I put it on everything, Aaron. I'm putting them on burgers. I'm putting it up with rice. And ground beef. Nice. You being, you bragging about pickling onions, but you refuse to eat salmon skin Is the all time. Get the fuck out. That is so fucked. What are we even talking about? You know what? Half the people that see this podcast just raise their hands because you said something Outrageous. You sent jar, pictures of you jarring pickled onions, but you won't eat salmon skin. What are we talking about? It is fish skin. How is this even similar? Red onions pickled are delicious. The fact that you're comparing to fish skin is so wild. It is fish skin. How is this even similar? Red onions pickled are delicious. The fact that you're comparing to fish skin is so wild. Hey man, I'm not going to turn it off before the chorus jam. You come the man.

[50:00]Who's that on this? Is that heavy D? Yeah, hell yeah. From heavy D and the boys. Well what they are now, man. Heavy D and the men. They've grown up. Yeah. Good song. Heavy D is not with us anymore. Right? So now it's just the men. Are you like a egg on the burger? What? What? What? What do you mean? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. What? What are you guys? If you're going to switch up a burger, how do you switch it up? You know what, guys? I'm a sucker for a barbecue bacon burger. You know what I mean? Like you get a bar, you get an onion ring on their barbecue bacon. Sign me up for that. I do like a fun burger. Like I'll, I'll have some avocados sometimes I'll have an egg sometimes I'll go crazy. Maybe some onion straws. You know what I'm not doing? You know what I did once and I'm not doing anymore. That's the Newt's burger in Rochester. That's the Newt burger is where the bread is grilled cheese sandwiches. Oh, you have two grilled cheese sandwiches with a burger in the middle. I ate it.

[51:00]Okay. That might shock you that I didn't try it and it made me very ill. Okay. Once again, forgetting that I don't do well with milk. Newt's real close to cannon falls. It is. It's actually two of them. Closer than you think. Yeah. It is. There were two of them. I think one of them closed. Wouldn't surprise me. Everybody said it was so good. I did not agree. Rolling going. Who's who's left? That's it. Is that it? That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. I would say at least like a month of our lives. I know, But we're not going to get to how many softball games I could go to. If we spend, we could even add a month to our lives. But what if we don't find that bit about, remember the one with the Sphinx, Where we were kissing the Sphinx for some reason? Remember that was a bit that came up at the end of the show once. Can you imagine us not having that in our uvra? It'd be crazy. Okay. I hang my head on that kissing the Sphinx a bit. It was something about

[52:00]Riddles. I don't remember what it was. Let's talk about the album. Okay. We're talking about Sam Cook live at Harlem Square. Now, Aaron, I was shocked to find out Harlem Square is not in New York Is that in New York? Yes. Correct. That blew my mind. It made this album totally a different sound to me when I realized this was In Miami, So I was like Miami in January in 1963 at one in the morning. This is recorded at one o'clock between the hours of one a.m. And four a.m. So that's important to remember. And you have said this is a time machine Moment for you. Of course, me with a time machine, I would go back in time. I would hang out with myself in college. We would kiss me and myself. We would kiss. I guess what, Aaron? With tongue. Hey, I'm not just lip kissing myself. It's with tongue. Otherwise, what's even the point? Yeah. I mean, your future, you give you like a free glass of WAP. We're without having to pay for the house or not. Yeah. For sure. For sure. Hey, dude, you should have this WAP. Do I owe you five bucks for the cup? No, it's on me. It's on me.

[53:00]Me. Yeah. It's on me. Yeah. Yes. This is a time machine moment for me. I would, I wish any time I hear this, I listen to it again today. It just sounds like a place where I want to be to hear because this is his. This is I think this is my favorite singer. It's Sam Rhodes writing and this is him at his truest expression. The voice is kind of raw. You can hear it's tired, But he didn't do this on any other recording. Even the live gospel recordings aren't this just full out singing. And I wish that this is for me as a time machine moment. I would go there and be in the crowd. I would see it and hear it and feel it But time machine moment for me is when I'm surrounded by all these more locks. Oh my God, they're all over the place. Hey, Sam, could you cook me a burger with applesauce? Sam Cook. Let me just say this, guys. The fact that you don't know that the more locks were characters In the HG Wells classic time machine. OK, just shows how smart I am. Yeah, you're pretty erudite. Yeah. When he wrote that book, he figured out how it was going to end.

[54:00]And he goes, HD, well, Wells. Wells, he dug holes to find water. You know, his name was issue Wells. Here's the thing. He also played in the low post for a shooting guard. His name was HG Bonsie Wells. He did have a nice post game, didn't he? Yeah, for sure. White body. Yeah. He described a noun that is HG good. Anyway, first Wells and Edward, we all know that. Now here's the deal. OK, this album, Sam Cook of the Harlem Square, Live of the Harlem Square, it's released in 1985. This album was recorded in 1963. And when it came out, Sam Cook was a pop star, right? I mean, that's what he was like a. Yeah, he had fully crossed over from gospel to pop. And they had said, you're going to hear, I'm going to tell you the years that these songs are hits. This is 63, right? Beginning of 63.

[55:00]Yep. This is 63. The run of hits he's had leading up to this is crazy. OK. And basically, they said, We want to do a live album with Sam Cook. He's a superstar. They hear the album that comes in. They say we cannot release this album. People think Sam Cook is a clean gospel singer. They think he is a friendly guy. Like it's just I mean, he's just singing about chain gangs. He's singing about what's another Sam Cook song. Aaron, quick. You send me Cupid. Perfect example. They cannot have the singer of Cupid appearing Into this raucous nightclub. OK, it's going to blow people's minds. So they say, OK, here's what we're going to do. We're going to take the tapes and put them in a drawer Until 1985, where the guy found it goes, holy shit, We need to release this right now. This is unbelievable. Aaron, I have never heard this album. I have never heard of this album. This is a all time find for me on the list.

[56:00]I love listening to this. I put this on my whole family is like, this is great. What is this? Right? This is so good that when you listen to this album, You realize how awesome it would be to see a Sam Cook show. His pattern between the songs normally I'm used to like the Guns N' Roses were like, you're going to die. You know, it's just like the terrible like, oh, get out of this part Of the live album. We want to get to the music. The pattern on this builds it up and builds it up. And I've included it. And even the ad lives in the middle of songs Where he'll be in the middle of a song and he'll just go, oh, I like this song. I'm going to do it again. Like it's just the ease with which he's doing this And King Curtis on the sax. It's so good. Is this really King Curtis on the sax? Yes, it's King Curtis on the sax. So basically, there's a couple of different versions. There's one, the first version, very loud crowd. Now, I've put the last song on this. I actually put in the loud crowd version so you can listen to it. But a lot of people say, Russell, This is one of the best live albums of all time. What do you think about that? Dolphins LeMent. Oh, damn, I wasn't thinking about that, Russell.

[57:00]God damn, you're hot. You're on fire right now. Told you, I'm like the Terminator. You're I think what holds it back on those lists Is that people have qualms about the sound quality Because it wasn't really engineered It was kind of thrown together as a live show and a recording. And so it's not maybe, I don't know. I don't know about these things. But I think on the list of best live albums, It's behind things like James Brown at the Apollo Or I don't know, whoever is at Budakon or whatever Because of the sound quality. But for me, What's the whipping post one? Didn't we listen to the whipping post? Yeah, the Allman Brothers or Yeah, Allman Brothers at the Fillmore. But for me, it's the best live album possible. I mean, it's just, it's too good. Matt my favorite live album is? Dolphins LeMent. No, turns out that's not even a real thing. That's the Mandela effect. I'm a throwing copper guy. Sam Cooke. No, not me. That's where they fell off. That's where they became sellouts to be throwing copper.

[58:00]Can we not get some more songs about the placenta? Please. And again, I have to say, I was searching for pictures. The fans have spoken. I was for Mother's Day. I was searching for pictures of the kids with their babies. And I did come across the picture of my wife's placenta That I took and sent to my sisters. My sisters knew we were having a baby And they all they got was a picture of a placenta. Which is funny until your sisters have a baby, Then they send you the picture of their placenta And you forgot about that bit. So you're looking for a picture of your new nephew Who could be anywhere from eight to 15 years old At this point. We're really not sure. Now, Sam Cooke has 29 singles in the top 40 In his career, Russell. This guy is a mega star. Of course. Right behind Rod Carew for the Tennessee Wall. He's got good news. Twisting the night away. Saturday night. The year after this recorded, Sam Cooke goes into a hotel And to listen to it, it's very controversial.

[59:00]They don't know what really happened, But it seems like maybe Sam Cooke was not taking His own advice on one of these songs. I'll just say that. Yeah. He was not on the up and up. And he was shocked by the hotel manager And died in a hotel. I'm just going to say right now, All time, bad place to die in a hotel. God, that would be the absolute worst. You're just there forever. You got a house, a hotel. What if it was like a really nice room though? Like with a view. Yeah, it turns out it was like a seedy roadside motel Outside Santa Monica. See, that's what's going to happen to me. Not even close in the story. I am getting to that point in my life Where when I'm doing some stuff, I'm like, If I die here, this is going to look really bad. This is not going to be a good story. Okay. Trying to steal those kids Out of the baby carriage at the subway station. All right, let's get into Sam Cook live at the, Whatever it is. I keep forgetting what it is. What is it? Left Harlem Square Club. Harlem Square Club. Now, can you guys tell me this?

[1:00:00]Why did he have to get the crowd so fired up In the beginning? Why did it take the crowd so long? Thank you very much. Ladies, we have a right now. We'd like to... We never did this one. But we do see star on our show. Just remember we did the best live album Intros on the list. That was an all-time great list. It was. This is so... So what do you say? Let's all get together And welcome him to the stand With a great big hand. How about it for Sam? Sam Cook! So they're kind of cheering, right? But then he's got to be like, Are you ready for some music? And they're kind of like... It's kind of crazy. I mean, what I've read is that... Yeah, what I've read is it was kind of like a big... How you doing out there? Look at it. No response. One more time. How are you doing out there? There we go. Oh, another back. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, they're good. Like, tonight we want you. Don't fight it. We're gonna feel it. Oh, he's feel it. I'll fast-forward a little bit. We're gonna feel it. It probably should have clapped Before he started recording. Yeah. You got to make sure it syncs up, Russell. He's probably on Zoom version 3.11. You know what I mean? Early Zoom.

[1:01:00]And, Rob, I don't know... I don't have to queued up Any of his studio recordings. But that's the big thing about this album, Is that this is nothing like What the whole world knew of Sam Cooke's style. Yeah. Up until this... Well, think of the song Cupid. Right? That perfectly encapsulates How I think of Sam Cooke. He's like a crooner. He's like this... Yes. You know, he's somebody Like my grandparents would listen to. And like, it's... Yeah. And then you hear this, It's like, oh, he's a hardcore. He's a... He's a fucking door soft. Yeah. Big time. Bane gang. Right. This came out in 1960. It peaked all the way up at number two. This song would not work The nowadays, I don't think. Like, if it was a song about like, People in the adult detention facility, I just don't... It'd be like about like, The people that are like, Picking up roadside trash. Oh. Yeah, pick up that bank That's floating across the freeway. They're stabbing that trash. Doesn't quite have the same... No. Putting out fires in California.

[1:02:00]All the fun stuff we're doing With that population. Next up, Cupid. Listen to the tone of this voice. I mean, it sounds so good. Russell, this was released in 2001. Got all the way to 17 on the Billboard 100. That's it? I know. That kind of blew my mind too. I thought it'd be higher. And those moments where he and King Curtis Are kind of in conversation, I mean, that's like... That this exists as an artifact Of a night that happened. Listen. Turn to the person to your right. Turn to the person to your left. One of these people's grandmother Got fingered at the song. The fact. Russell, like, oh my God, there's just mirrors. I'm gonna bring up something a little bit later. Okay. That song, Cupid, that version right there,

[1:03:00]We have to be honest and say That would probably be the best song On 80% of the albums we've listed. I would agree. Is it not? Yeah. Am I wrong or? No, you're not wrong. Why is this? Is it because it's a live album Or what are we, what am I missing here? And why is this not way higher? Matt, one of you guys. I think, right? And we've talked about this in the past, Like Bob Marley's albums, stuff like that. This is a collection of singles Because they didn't make albums back in the day. They made singles for radios, Put together over a three year period, right? And put together, it's not an album. It's a greatest hits collection, I think. Am I wrong here? And I mean, I don't know. Well, it's it's not a greatest hits. I mean, it's a greatest hits collection In that, yes, he was choosing the hits, But it is, I think it's put together From multiple performances that night, But it is one night of a live show. Okay. So it's definitely that. It's not an anthology necessarily. It's that night that it was recorded in January 63.

[1:04:00]I think they took pieces from, Because he did it twice that night. He did it one at 10 p.m. And one at 1 a.m. But why it's not higher? I don't know, I don't know. Maybe because of the sound quality, Maybe because it's short, I'm not sure. But you're right, Matt. It's not, they didn't go into a studio And make an album and said live recording And it's picking his hits. Do you think Sam Cooke for the second time he recorded Could sense that like he's just so tired And just the good performance He was hoping was going to be there Is just not there. Like a lot of things he was saying Is just falling flat. It seems like nobody's really responding to him. Sam Cooke kind of, He probably should have put The 45 minute timer on it again. He should have kept it tight. Might have been a good way to go. Got to power through Rob. No. Now, Medley, it's all right for sentimental reasons. The chatter into this song is so good. Listen to this. Oh yeah. Shaker and wake her up. Oh, can you imagine?

[1:05:00]That's so scary to me. Too many references to sleep of the eyes. And he's like, when they start all together And they just I don't know. Russell, I hear right. Don't, I don't want to think about The eyes. It makes me blink. Okay. When I look over and my loved one Is pulling sleep out of her eye. Don't need to see it. Turn away. Do you prolapse? That's a prolapse moment for me. What happens with Jenny? What? You said your lover does it. But what happens with Jenny? Who knows? Who knows? She's always waking away before me. I mean, my, my, this is great. And it feels like it's on because Sam Cooke deserves to be on every List that comes out on Possibly can be. But like, if you put this together, I mean, I think there's people That think you too is the greatest Live band ever. So you put a live show of theirs on. I think, Pearl Jeff, I'm thinking Of like Bruce Springsteen. He might be one of the best

[1:06:00]Live artists of all time. Like you put one of his live Albums over any of his students, You know, things like that. You know, I don't know. So I think it feels like it's Just caught in a middle of something. I agree with Russell. This should be way higher because A part of it is the mythology of This album. This album has a brilliant story. You could sell this as a movie, Right? Like they take this Tape, they tape them in a thing. It's too wild. It's too good. They shelve it. Three years later, he's shot and Killed that they don't find it Again for another what? You know, for 20 years or Whatever, like it's an Unbelievable story. This should be everybody should Know about this album. But I see what Matt's saying. Like my initial impression is, This is like a greatest hits. It's a live performance. It's different than most of the Other ones. My query would be, It makes the list. It's on the list. Why wouldn't it be way higher? Yeah, that's a good one. If you want to argue, it shouldn't Be on the list at all. I can hear that. I mean, like, should it be higher Than Bob Marley's, You know, greatest hits kind of

[1:07:00]A thing. I'm just going to say this right Now. Anyone who tells me that, That cringcraft album or Whatever we listen to a few weeks Ago is better than this Sam Cook one. Matt, as we, you and I love to Say, get the fuck out of here. The Harlem Square wasn't ready For the beeps and boops that They would have brought. Can you imagine? It's like, hey, we're going to Have Sam Cook followed by Kraftwerk. We're going to get late. It's going to be double. It's going to be a double show. Twisting the Night Away, This got all the way up to Number nine, released in 62. This must have been his huge Hit at the time because he Keeps referencing it throughout The show and like teasing That he's going to be Twisting the night away. Yeah, it's weird because it's Not the high point of the album For me, but yeah, it must have Been. No. It was probably the top Radio hit at the time. Yeah. Yeah. I think he knows how to put Together a show like how to How to get that up and down. Well, he learned that from His gospel shows. I mean, he grew up in a Gospel family of singing. I think his dad might have Been a pastor and then all

[1:08:00]Of his brothers sang and then He was in a group called The Soulsters and these were The kinds of gospel shows Where women were, if not Disrobing, getting very close To it. And it was like they would tour And people would say like, Oh, why don't you come home With me and like my daughter Is home. It's like he knew how to keep An audience on their Toes and lead them to It's the same we Hear from Aretha during the Amazing Grace album. And it's actually again, we Talked about sinners last Week. It's this like juxtaposition Of the sacred and the profane And that line between what's Sacred and profane in black Gospel music and black pop music And now he's crossed over But he knows how to get a crowd Right to the edge of something Before taking over the edge. I mean, it really is like, you Know what, I've been watching Russell since we recorded Last week. I've been watching Kane's Entrances into the WWE over And over just his and it's Like the hands up and then Slam the hands down. You walk into a room now And it's it's it's almost Like this, right? It's like you can see he's

[1:09:00]Like a professional wrestler. He knows how to get the Crowd going. He knows when he's going to Get a pop. He knows how to build up Some suspense. Okay. Except he's singing Cupid Instead of putting somebody Into the tombstone. Oh, I have to share something With the other night. I was staying up and just Trying to kind of I don't Know if you guys call it Doom scrolling or just like Mindlessly do nothing Before I went to bed For a little while. Love it. So guess what I do? Okay. Listen to a podcast. That's weird. And I pull up on the TV WrestleMania one. I'm just going to have WrestleMania one on up on The bathroom. Oh, on the big screen TV. And the opening match. I forgot this is Tino Santana Versus a guy called the Executioner. Look at this guy's mask. That was the guy who opened WrestleMania one. Oh, what would you describe That mask like? It is like a spider man That your parents got you At the dollar store. You know what I mean? I mean, like your parents Get out of it. That's WrestleMania one.

[1:10:00]It is. That is a terrible, Terrible bad. See, eye holes are way too big. You know me. I've got strong opinions On eye holes on masks. Those are ones that are way big. The other crazy thing Uppercase I forgot about this. One of the matches, Matt Bourne versus Ricky Siebel. Rob, who does Matt Bourne Become later on? Matt Bourne. Matt Bourne. Doink the Clown. He was in WrestleMania one Against Ricky the Dragon Siebel. Wow. I can't believe Matt Bourne Didn't catch on as much As Doink the Clown. Yeah. Somebody have mercy. Now listen, somebody halfway Through the song. I feel like having a good time. We're going to stand and sing All of them tonight. Let me listen to this. And fellas that make me feel Good just put it right back. Aaron. Well, like where does this Break? We're talking live albums. We posted a live at the Apollo. James Brown was like a top 50

[1:11:00]Album or close to it, I think. Right. Yeah. Why do you think this one would Rank that much lower than the James Brown one? I mean, maybe because I don't. This has more hits. This has more hits than that Album, I will say. Yeah. I still don't quite know. I mean, it might be because James Brown at the Apollo just Had a longer, it was out for Longer. So I had a longer time to be Influential and get that sort of Reverential treatment as a Great. And James Brown was doing it First. In fact, I think to some Degree this performance is Inspired by James Brown at The Apollo. And I think Sam had done versions Of the show at the Apollo 2 After James Brown. But why? I don't know why this would be Down in the two 40s and live At the Apollo's in the top 50. And I don't know, I can't put My finger on it. It is a very fun listen. Is it not? Yeah. I will say I did raise an ear When he says, quote, I don't Have leukemia. Now, I have to say in the Middle of the live concert For him to say that in the Middle of a song, I was

[1:12:00]Like, that's a very strange Thing for him to, yeah, for him To ablib. And I was like, why would he Say that? Well, it turns out that this Song, the lyrics were, tell me What is wrong with me. And it got a rumor started That Sam Cook was suffering From leukemia. So from then on, when he Performed the song, he would Say, I don't have leukemia. If you listen to the song in The middle of it, it's a Very strange thing. But it did get me. It's bizarre. But it did get me thinking There. What are some songs that Mentioned diseases? And we're going to go Through the top songs that Mentioned diseases. No, I'm just going to say That. Wow. One. I only picked one. Okay. I only picked one diseases. I am not picking bummer Diseases. There are no, because I can Tell you, when you start Looking at D12 on here, What song from D12 was Out there? Drips. Oh, it was about Gonorrhea. It was either that or the Spina Bifida song.

[1:13:00]Oh, my God. Russell. Oh, my God. Russell. You got Kat and Ijo in here? There was a song about, Oh, I'm not going to do Disease jokes. I'm not going to. No, I'm just going to Make a list about them. I'm thinking of sad things I see on TV sometimes. I'm not going to make jokes About this stuff. Now I've only picked Fun diseases. Okay. We're going to start While they recorded their Album, The Pod, Both Dean and Gene Ween Got Mono Nucleosis And they wrote the song Mono Nucleosis. This is a Ween song. You guys ever have Mono? No. I never had Mono yet. Right. I didn't miss a day At Richfield Public Schools Of school until 12th grade. Oh, my God. The spring of 12th grade. I got Mono. Didn't have a girl for Anything. I dumped a couple months Before that And missed a few

[1:14:00]Baseball games in the spring. I'm sitting in those three or four. Yeah. That's a sad story, man. Aaron and I had a I'm not going to even We won't do any details, But there was someone we went To college with And he got Mono And he ended up going home For probably a week or so When he wasn't feeling good. He might have been home Far than that. He was kind of trying To date this lady. They may have been Full dating. I don't know how far. Fox dating. Full dating. Yep. F-A-U-X Fox dating. Another guy we know From that dorm ended up Kind of heaven relations. Yeah. Heaven relations with that lady While this man was gone. Opportunistic. Wow. Yeah. Well, he was out with Mono And I always figured I can't ever get Mono Where I'm going to lose All the action. Yeah. But Russell, Wise man once said A boyfriend is not a no. You know what I mean? Like that is not a no. Russell is being very kind, But I'll put it right out there. That lady has been Mentioned in this podcast More than once. Yes. Well, we need to move it along. Can I just say this? Russell in a In a full one of the Full relationships I had

[1:15:00]Is when I took a date out For soup. That was a full relationship. Soup? Well, yeah, full relationship. Full relationship. Yeah, full. Next up, We have King Lizard And the Gizzard Wizard. Oh, here we go. The Superbug. Such a great day. Superbugs a disease? It's a When these bacteria run well. I don't want to give you A bummer, Russell, But they develop Resistances to medicine, Antibiotics. You get what's called A Superbug. That's like what MRSA is. Remember when the Tampa Bay Everybody was lifting weights And losing large parts Of their bodies Were falling off? That's a Superbug. Also, Superbug is What Aaron's going to have Crawling in his house After these mealworms come alive. Oh, I know. It has. Aaron, I hate to tell you You've got a weird pet kid. I didn't want to be the one To tell you this, But your kid likes weird pets. I was a weird pet guy growing up. I had a pet tarantula. I had lizards. I had piranhas. It's in my future. Yeah. It's in my future for sure. This kid is going to own a Ferret the moment he goes out Of your house. I hate to tell you this,

[1:16:00]The ferret, the call of the ferret To the weird pet guy Is too tempting. My brother had an outdoor rabbit. That's not a pet. That's just a... No, it was in like a coop. It was in like a... That's the case. I got about three of them Right now underneath me. Yeah. Oh, no, no. It's technically a hutch, By the way. My wife had a ferret For a while. She did? Yeah. I know. Your wife had a ferret for a while? Yeah. I hate to say this about your wife, But it's hot. Hot stuff. So we were at a weird pet tank. I don't know. Yeah. I hate to say that about your Wife, man, but it does. Rob, if you were going to do A weird pet now, What would be like on your top Three list of weird pets You could get? Nothing. I wouldn't own a fish right Now. I don't want to do any work On a tank. I don't want to... Because you know what's True about all weird pets? They smell. They stink. They are weird pets Because they smell bad. We did hermit crabs

[1:17:00]A few years. Terrible. Smells awful. Just the worst. Ferrets, they literally have Musk glands. Terrible. Smell terrible. Tomorrow awful. They have glands that make Them musky. That's like... That's like... Their oil is like... It was like brownish. I don't even know the name Of the gland. Exactly. Good for shoes, Not good for a dorm room. I didn't tell you... Did I tell you guys How my neighbors Brought back iguanas once, Which I'm sure was illegal And they had iguanas In their house That walked around free, Like not in a cage. Free range. Free range iguanas. That's tasty iguanas. You can get really corn Finished. I like them corn finished too, But... Next up, Frank Zappa. Why does it... Well... Now this is a horse. No, I can't. This is too much. This is... Yeah, I can't. Now this is where I looked up. This is a song about Trichinose, Trichinomyosis. It's often unnoticeable, But the main symptom is discharge. So...

[1:18:00]Oh, this gets mixed up. This is hilarious. I would say that would be A number one symptom. Like, if I'm discharging you When I'm not trying to, Thumbs down. That's a bad day. Might want to get that checked out. I did have a UTI once. I had a minor UTI. And it felt like I was always peeing my pants. It was crazy to me. What kid? You and I were trying to have a baby. So, of course, immediately I got a UTI. Of course. Rob gets mad when you... I'm so deep in those guts. But he'll do this. What's that? You don't think people want to hear The map song in the directions, But they want to hear about your UTI. This is like comparing fish skins To fruit or whatever you did earlier Today, Russell. Of course, everyone wants to hear About my UTI. I guarantee right now, People are mad. They're not hearing the end Of my story to the UTI. But guess what? That was the end. Okay, because I went in And I got a test and they go, You don't have... We don't think you have UTI. So, I still am not sure what it was, But it felt like I was peeing all the time.

[1:19:00]I was always checking the front of my pants. As a teacher, guys, Of course, Pea spots on the pants, I made your concern, Because that is the kind of stuff That will get passed to brother. And you'll be the teacher With a pea spot forever. It'll never go away. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. Next up, we have Weird Al Living with a hernia. And a hernia, Because it feels like an injury, Not a disease. Oh, this is fucked, Russell. If you're criticizing this list, This is a great list. They're great. No, you're right, though. It's not a disease. It's an injury. How did my wife catch a hernia From a toilet seat, then? That doesn't even make sense. You told me she caught a hernia at the gym. Actually, that could happen. The video for this, The Weird Al video, He actually recorded on the set Of Rocky IV. Where they did the James Brown entrance With Apollo. I forgot how that ended. And then finally, of course, Russell,

[1:20:00]I'm realizing that's also not a disease. He dies. He dies. He's a scat man. It's a song about stuttering. The scat man, Singing about how he overcame His childhood stutter, Would be the scat man. Now, I did do a little scat man research. I went on a bit of a scat man deep dive. Is this a scat man funeral dirt? That's your first scat man deep dive. This is not the funeral dirt. I cannot tell you how many times I've thought about that today, though. Where is that funeral dirt? I bet I got it around here somewhere. But it turns out scat man. Here's the funeral dirt. The scat man. Oh, I forgot how fucked up this is. The scat man. Scat man's world. The album that the scat man is on Is the ninth best selling overseas album Of all time. I'm going to say that again. Scat man's album is the ninth, Ninth best overseas selling album of all time. It is one of the top albums ever in Japan

[1:21:00]By a non-Japanese artist. It reached number two and stayed on the charts For 40 weeks in Japan. Scat man was huge in Japan. What the fuck? And then finally, It turns out that Beck has a song called Naja. He debuted this song on David Letterman. And guess who played it? Probably more of a symptom than a disease. Hey Russell, I knew you were going to say that, Trying to bring me down. Russell, guess who played the barimboo On David Letterman when Beck played this? Who was that? Borat. My wife. He was playing with Beck on David Letterman. What? Very cool. Russell, when it comes to songs that are Kind of about diseases, although we found There's kind of an irony. There's no word that can describe all these things. We could have possibly foreseen this one coming. But they played it with Borat.

[1:22:00]Who did it better? Oh, Russell. So good. That's amazing. That's a list about diseases. And I'm not renaming the list, Russell, Just to make you happy. A list by Russell. That was easily a top five list. There's some new songs. Top five lists. Do you like that I Hurt 20 P for a song? Russell, was that like that one? Actually, it didn't. The backside was great. Next up, bring it on home with me. The original of this, Aaron had Lou Rawls in the background. Yeah, it's good. The studio version is good. Released in 62, got all the way up to 13. And it's fine. I would think you sent me. I think you sent me his probably his most famous song. And this is the only appearance of the song On the album. Yeah. It keeps over and kind of makes it sound thank you. He teases. He teases it. He's it. Yeah. He takes the other one where when I'm listening to this, When I get whether it's an album or not,

[1:23:00]That discussion is up for discussion whenever. But you listen to this and you're like, Whoo, how is this has to be higher? If they're going to put it on there, it's got to be higher. 100 percent. 100 percent. Travis, you're going to say it doesn't belong. I hear it. You've got to get to the hit. There's no other. Yeah, there's no other recording of him doing this. Listen to this beat drop coming right up here, man. Here it comes. I would be a bad Sam Cook because I'd be off timing wise a lot. Oh, so good. Next song, Nothing Can Change This Love released in 62, Got up to number two on the charts. Now, I told you there's been various remasters of this album. This is from one of the original versions. This is his final song, Having a Party.

[1:24:00]Whoa, it's a mess, right? And you can hear the audience is way for checking the light. It makes it feel claustrophobic, but you're going to talk about live albums. So like shouldn't like Garth double live or something beyond this list? This is 100 percent. I think there's a different musical talent that comes with it. I remember how big that was. That was huge. And I remember when I was just going to say throwing copper, And so please say whatever you're going to say. It is tough with Sam because the album that he recorded right after this Show is called Nightbeat. I love it. It's wonderful. It has a lot of old Charles Brown tunes and some blues tunes, But it's a very quiet, understated album. And then otherwise, yes, he recorded studio albums, But they were, as Matt said, like collections of singles. So for Rolling Stone, it's really this or that greatest hits

[1:25:00]That came out in compilation portrait of Sam Cooke, Which is great, but doesn't belong on the list. So it's, I guess like they need Sam Cooke on the list. It has to be this. So they have to choose the live album. Agree, it still should be higher because it's so great, But I think it's a tough fine for an album. Listen, I stopped listening when you said the words Nightbeat. Now, Aaron, do you know what that made me think of? You should listen to the album. It's very good. It actually made me think of when I was in a medieval rap duo. We were called the Nightbeats. And it sounded a little something like this. Hello, sir. Hello, madam. We're going to the castle. We're going to go Adam. I've got my armor. This ain't foil. I hope they don't burn me with that hot oil. You're natural. I don't mean to brag. I don't mean to boast, but I'm so good at the joist. I could think of anything. They're riding a joist.

[1:26:00]I'm always boasting. So I was like, people say, mommy, I can be boastful sometimes. Why would we have a timer? Would we get little gems? So much. This is like when you go to sleep and you find out You still have a little bit of a sweet tart back by your teeth. You kind of put a little bonus. Now the bonus sweet tart, Russell. Here's the deal. When's the last time you had some sweet tarts? Bonus. Bonus. Are we this morning? I'll be honest with you. I have not had sweet tarts in a long time. You're right. Because that did make me think. When was the last time I had sweet tarts? I hope the answer is like Halloween, right? That's the only appropriate time to have sweet tarts. Can't you believe you have the strange bag of what are Those called smarties, those little sugar pills or whatever you call them? I think eating smarties, peeling it open, Like a bag of Girl Scout cookies, putting it in your mouth. Delicate, refined. Eating sweet tarts, ripping it out of the tiny package Where it's like pills, it's like travel tile and all. Get the fuck out of here with that shit.

[1:27:00]We're going Mento style. When we're packing hard candy, We're going Mento style or we're going tic-tac style. We're not going tile and all in the paper wrapper style. Get the fuck out of here with that. I was in Paris airport. They had like mango or tangerine, Mento's, unbelievably good. Oh, unbelievably good. Love of Mento's. I don't think I've ever had one. You've never had a Mento's, Russell? I don't think so. Those ads didn't work on you like they did. I mean, God, I fell for those hard. Now listen, is this album Live from the Harlem Square Club? Is this a rolling well-toned? This is perfect at 240. Okay, 240. No, not 230. It's different. Or is that would be a rolling well-toned? If this album should be higher on the list, Okay, it's a rolling bone. Or is it supposed to be lower? We don't need it. Get back there. It doesn't sound right to me. All right, there's too many Sam Cooke's in this kitchen.

[1:28:00]Throw back to a joke I made earlier. That was pretty good. What do you think, Russell? Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling ground? Kind of tough. I could see this not being on the list at all Because it is really just alive, greatest hits. However, you want to look at it. But if it's going to be on there, I think it's got to be higher. There are too many amazing songs. You listen to this, You think about what you want to put on your record player. What do you want to have in your collection? This is what I would want to have on my collection And what I would probably play. If I were to acquire this in the next few weeks, Which I probably will, I could see this being a record That would be in my top 12 rotation for the rest of my life. So to me, I'm going to say it's rolling bone. It's got to be higher on the list. If it is on the list, and Rolling Stone has said it's eligible, I say put it higher. Aaron, what do you think? Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling ground? Yeah, I think I made my bias and my thoughts clear on this one. I think it's wonderful to listen to.

[1:29:00]It's such an important artifact and document Of what happened on this night and with these artists. So for me, yes, it's alive. Yes, it's not mastered that well, but it's rolling bone. It needs to be higher. Matt, what do you think? Rolling well-toned, rolling bone, or rolling ground? I disagree with Aaron when he says That it shouldn't even be on the list. I think it absolutely belongs on the list. I agree with Russell a hundred percent that it should. Yeah, if it's going to be there's just, I mean, we could go through how many albums and just say This should be higher than them. You know, kind of a deal. Russell threw out a couple of them already. But I, yeah, rolling bone should be higher on the list. Completely disagree with Aaron. Unfortunately, fair, tough but fair. That reminds me when I got yelled at By the guy who made mini donuts. He was tough, but he was the fair.

[1:30:00]Russell, if you, if, if I said I could get you A mini donut machine at your wedding, Would that encourage you to get married? It'd probably just be a line and I don't like lines. So I would say no. And yes, Russell, yeah, there will be a line Because I'm going to get the one of the line of dough That goes down the oil. Then there's a machine that flips it. Yeah the mainly donut maker I'm talking about Where you can see it in the oil gets flipped. Speaking of machines, I will say this before Rob's final ranking. I had a meeting today with someone in an office. They had a record player in their office. The only thing I could think about for the whole time Was what kind of record player is it? So at the end of the meeting, I said, Kind of record players that he talked about it For like a minute. He explained the speakers he's got there, The speakers he's got at home. Record player in the office. I think that's a must change for my life. Yeah, I'll do it. And you have the big baller over there So you can make that happen. Yeah, I did it.

[1:31:00]And you know what? Write it off. Write it off. God, that'd be a great wedding present, wouldn't it? Oh, I should see all the things Aaron's been sending me To write off on my taxes recently. I'm surprised he's that aggressive with it. Now listen. Okay. Look, man. I'm not trying to give any more to this regime. Unfortunately, you guys are incorrect. Shit. This gets a rolling chain gong. This album makes me think about our broken prison system. You already used that joke. Oh, you think it's a joke? Wow. I'll laugh it up, I guess. For profit prisons, Aaron. Real fun. Disgusting. Disgusting. I'm going to tear up. My list about diseases was more fun Than what you just said, Aaron. Think about it. That was a good disease. That was a good twist. Diseases and other ailments.

[1:32:00]And maladies in general. Ailments is probably a good way to. Okay. By list of ailments. I'm going to get this clean rustle So I can edit that in. Ailments. Am I going to go back and edit in ailments Every time I was at disease? No. Too much work. Probably not. Next time that we could do a list about ailments. Ailments is my favorite kind of Mentos. Now, ailments. Weird Al's younger brother. Now, here's the deal. What? No, wait. He would have the same first name? Ailments. Not smart. Unreadable. You have experience to give him a different last name In the same first name. Not how you normally name kids. Just going to say that right now. Ailments green. No. Except for George Foreman. You did do that. Now, here's the deal. This next album. It's massive attack. And it's just like the USA flag that Aaron Has hanging up in his garage.

[1:33:00]Blue lines. Massive attack. Blue lines. I get it. Well, it's better than that American flag that Robin. What's his name? Head up. They had blurred lines. What's his name? I'm going to edit it in later. What's his name? Robin Thicke. Robin Thicke. Don't get me started on Robin Thicke. Talk about something that was not my nickname In college. But was it Ween? Where's the goodbye? Where I screwed everything up. There it is. It's time to say goodbye. Hey, both Dean and me and Ween both have mono. Oh, my God. It's the worst.

[1:34:00]Where's the worst day we've had in Ween? You know, Russell, I was thinking about you With the baseball stuff. Back in my day, Coaches didn't give us nerd clusters. Okay. We had to walk to the baseball diamond. Okay. I had to make sure my brother was getting Fucking hammered in the outfield. Okay. So you'd throw up. All right. I got it. Yeah. And back in my day, Russell, we didn't get nerds Clusters. You know what the coach gave me? The clear. We didn't even have the cream back then. We just had the clear. The greenies were the best. We had old trucker pills. If you put one in play, Rob, They said that was a tough fair. Tough fair.