Massive Attack: Blue Lines (1991)

[00:00]rob was playing orgy blue monday crank crank that up again for a second rob okay so rob was playing

[00:06]this when we all jumped on that's what she said playing some music in the background when we jump

[00:10]on we usually make small talk for a minute or two i heard this song i was like oh this was on the

[00:15]rust winamp player in college this is how arrogant i am the fuck the fuck if there were a thousand

[00:24]people in the world that had a better winamp list than i did oh wow i think i think my list of songs

[00:31]would smash almost everyone in the world i'm gonna admit there's some people out there that probably

[00:36]had like everything on the list but a curated list of i don't know let's say eight nine hundred

[00:41]songs or whatever i guarantee mine is in the top one percent really yeah so what what's a mistake

[00:47]most people make when they're making a mix of music what's what's what when does that go south

[00:52]i think one would be when you start

[00:54]adding too much right you start adding song if you're adding songs that you're gonna skip

[00:59]and it's too much on your winamp right if you've got skippers you it shouldn't be on there get out

[01:04]of there wow get out of you do you think for our fans could you make a list on spotify when you're

[01:11]bored sometime summer's coming up so we're all off work for a little bit do you think you could

[01:15]make a little list on spotify where you could emulate your winamp i think i can and here's why

[01:22]i think i might still have a

[01:24]thumb drive with old mp3s of my whole oh my god i was gonna say guarantee russell's got a list

[01:29]no i mean i can i can i just say this before just to frame this up rob would you have a robe on

[01:39]no i got my my linen shirt on linen shirt on and aaron's got no clothes but i was gonna say

[01:44]aaron's got his i'm taking my shirt off going shirtless today yeah if you look up at the sky

[01:51]you're gonna see a picture of russ wearing a t-shirt

[01:54]wow wow uh aaron why are you uh why are you shirtless today it's been hot by the way russell

[02:04]real quick sorry aaron real quick russell if you find a folder on that thumb drive that says

[02:08]uh import uh not important files don't look do not open them okay do not open them please

[02:16]this sounds like similar advice where i should be careful when i'm opening um audio files or

[02:23]any sort of video files on my phone or something like that i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry

[02:24]i'm sorry i'm sorry aaron why did you have no shirt on today uh number one because i wanted to be

[02:50]like rob but it's just it's hot here the last couple of days and we had to

[02:54]we had the dryer on and our this room is probably not ventilated to code so it's just a bit steamy

[03:00]in here but i think we i think we might get a heat pump this summer guys so it's things are

[03:04]looking up around here wow aaron yeah the guys don't know how close i was to driving and seeing

[03:12]you last night i know what a what a what a titillating idea it would have been i was so

[03:17]excited man i was only about two hours away i had somebody request that i drive a car from reno to

[03:24]san francisco and i was like oh my god i'm gonna drive a car from reno to san francisco and i was

[03:27]like oh my god i'm gonna drive a car from reno to san francisco and i was like oh my god i'm gonna

[03:28]drive a car from reno to san francisco and i said i will change my plans let me know and of course

[03:31]with my knowledge of california i was like that sounds far away i don't know where two cars

[03:36]wouldn't you have met in the middle wow that's a great point could have made anything happen

[03:40]i was just saying i was just saying let me know if i can change my plans and get back here

[03:44]he ain't doing that rob rob had a chance to come to my house once and he turned around and went

[03:48]home instead

[03:49]i love the idea that i would make aaron ditches out of my car i would make aaron ditches out of my car

[03:54]his family like on a family trip and just come see me because just because i'm just like hey i'm

[03:58]here come see me this is what we're gonna do we were i was all set i was gonna make you a bunk

[04:02]yeah you're east coast oh yeah no i was gonna stay over i said well i said i said to jenny i go i

[04:08]don't know how much room aaron has i said but i because the house i picture is i know it's smaller

[04:12]than we got enough now here's well rob do you want to hear about this here's what i did tell

[04:15]jenny i go but to look out because the drainage in his backyard is fucked i bet it's french

[04:19]it's all here's what we do with guests now rob what's that

[04:24]anna and i i don't want to bunk in wallace's room for the night no it's nice no because we only have

[04:29]two bedrooms so he has a he has a pull-out couch in his room so anna and i bunk in there with

[04:33]wallace and then guests get our room you could have slept this is only like you're only like

[04:38]your mom though right aaron like so far we've only done it yeah we've only done it so far with

[04:42]anna's parents you know what i would offer that to rob aaron the nasty freaky stuff that i would

[04:48]have done in your bed and then i'd be like i did some nasty stuff there and i'm not going to tell

[04:53]you until the podcast

[04:54]it would be i'll find some boss of baked beans underneath your pillow you'd find a a thing on

[05:02]the wall just mashed on makeup like spread against the wall like what even happened here yours

[05:07]a half-eaten hoagie flushed on the toilet

[05:11]yeah he's eating this hoagie in here oh a high heel a high heel with a condom over it you're

[05:16]like i don't even get what this is i don't even get what happened here what a crime scene but

[05:22]yeah we were so close to visiting here and i was so excited to be here and i was so excited to be

[05:24]here and you know what i was you know what i was excited about is i was going to tell aaron i want

[05:28]to go out to eat and i just wanted to see what happened i was so excited i was going through

[05:32]that i was like where would we have taken them because wireless is here too so like it's like

[05:36]where would we have taken rob and jenny tacos they could have been impressed and enjoy it

[05:40]yeah we probably yeah there's some i don't think jenny would have gone with him he she would have

[05:44]flown home yeah oh i get it did you see all that stuff i could have been she's not packing that

[05:50]stuff into a car she's not getting on the plane leaving well the plan did not get us out of the

[05:54]far enough to actually make anybody have to make any decisions about how much how much time maybe

[05:58]we spent with each other for this last week maybe it was a lot of time a lot of time close together

[06:03]and i kept hearing the same story or somebody kept hearing the same stories over and over

[06:06]not a big deal maybe it was looking forward to a two and a half hour car ride then a flight across

[06:10]the country by myself uh but that didn't happen instead i came home uh and i made a little error

[06:15]on what time i was getting home last night by seven hours what's that the seven hour error

[06:21]the other thing that's not working here is reno's four hours for me so i don't know where

[06:24]you were that was two and a half hours away i was gonna drive fast jenny told him it was only

[06:30]jenny told him it was only two hours matt matt tell tell the listeners what we're talking about

[06:34]we got a text shade with rob that that you need to fill people in on i think rob should tell us

[06:41]i think rob listen uh jenny was going to show you her gold medal if you guys want

[06:44]oh okay i'll give you a hand there's one person in the family that got a gold medal

[06:48]yeah okay and jenny wants to show yours it's not a big deal uh but i need to find some other hobby

[06:54]now here's the deal i asked jenny in the morning what time you think we're landing in new york

[06:58]she goes i don't know like six i think it says oh okay great so then i go oh hey i thought we

[07:04]were landing later makes sense to me we're flying out of reno at uh well now that i think about we

[07:10]were flying out at 11 which already makes that a tough the math is not is tough but already so i'm

[07:15]i'm in the plane at 11 and i say hey or i'm walking around uh that morning i go hey i can do the

[07:20]podcast with the guys a friday night let me text let's get it all set up so we text we get it all

[07:24]set up everybody's excited i'm gonna be flying back in no no no no i i wouldn't i wouldn't say

[07:29]everybody's pumped up they can't get enough of it okay everybody says fine okay everybody's still

[07:35]excited to do the podcast it's not a big deal they can't wait to hear my stories they're excited with

[07:39]what's going on in my life uh and then as i get on the plane we're flying to uh salt lake uh for a

[07:46]connection and i realized that in salt lake we're landing like kind of later than i thought like

[07:54]and i'm like okay well five so then if i get there in minus two hours because then i'm like well

[08:01]there's a is a two hour three hour time change i don't even know so then i actually look at my

[08:05]ticket and it says we're arriving at 11 45 p.m so you're off you're off about six hours have you

[08:11]had have you had a ticket there's just so many questions have you had a ticket the whole time

[08:15]i have had the ticket the whole time but in my defense a ticket just tells you when you're

[08:20]excuse me a ticket just tells you when you're getting on it doesn't say when you're getting

[08:24]click another button you have the app yes i have do you have a watch excuse me matt and i

[08:30]were flummoxed that rob would just like get on like he's not even looking at the ticket or the

[08:36]app to be fair to be fair this resulted in about i would say 10 texts in a row where all of them

[08:42]are just saying how can you not be responsible you're a grown-ass man how can you not be

[08:47]responsible for yourself when you're traveling i would never just listen to somebody about what

[08:50]time we're going to be there and then russ tried and then i kind of said something to russ tried to

[08:54]say well i'm actually very impressed i would like to be as relaxed as you guys but i know what he

[08:58]meant no i wish i could rob is a dumb shit no you were just i think you were but i think you've got

[09:03]an easygoing button in you rob that i don't have you think what's the easygoing button

[09:09]you think i have an easygoing button you do this very much i do i just the if if if you hadn't

[09:18]heard all the stories and look i love jenny great person love hanging out there love going to

[09:24]clubs all this stuff right we have talked about the errors that have happened with her traveling

[09:30]okay right now it is true about her man this is getting creepy it is true that right after she

[09:36]told me what time we're uh flying home she did relay to me a story that she had ordered stitch

[09:41]fix which is a bunch of clothes you know that you could buy yep and she hasn't used it in a while

[09:45]and she had it delivered and so she was asking her mom you know has it arrived yet

[09:49]and it turned out and they said no james well that's strange it turned out that she had sent

[09:54]her house in rochester minnesota a place that we have not lived for almost nine years so these

[10:01]clothes just showed up at somebody's houses and i'm i'm thinking to myself when you just ordered

[10:06]from somewhere that you know you haven't ordered from literally since one of our children has been

[10:11]in diapers you haven't ordered since then wouldn't you just go hey i better change his address because

[10:15]there's no way my current address is in here didn't even think about it she's like yeah all

[10:18]my clothes got sent there and of course you know stitch fix if you don't return the stuff it's like

[10:24]they're like the rei of the custom clothes business exactly turn that shit so yeah guys

[10:30]listen here's my in my defense i don't think two people need to be in charge of the trip

[10:36]you know what i mean somebody's got to be in the back of the covered wagon checking out how many

[10:40]boxes of bullets you brought 99 you're absolutely right two people don't need to be in charge of the

[10:45]trip but if you're on the trip you just take that you know take that extra five seconds and just

[10:50]maybe check the board when you're walking by it or you know look at your app

[10:54]and just say first of all i find this whole thing disrespectful to women

[10:58]second of all second of all it's meant to be disrespectful to you

[11:03]let's be clear second of all i will never do that i will never double check where i'm going

[11:12]okay i am in it to win it i cannot tell you how many times i've gotten on trains with jenny

[11:16]where our tickets have been off by days we're not even in the right day

[11:20]okay and i have learned to live with it because i'm too lazy to double

[11:24]check everything all right i i just had believe it or not i just had jenny booked three flights

[11:30]for me oh my three flights while i was sitting at this computer yeah oh yeah are you going next

[11:35]uh going to mexico okay wish i wouldn't have said it like that actually

[11:39]hey hey matt i don't even know when rob's going there but matt or aaron you

[11:46]you have any plans that weekend rob's going to mexico or not i got no you know i'm free yeah

[11:52]oh i got plans i'm actually going to mexico i'm going to mexico i'm going to mexico i'm going to

[11:54]somewhere rob but i'm glad you're going to mexico again russell we cannot bring up stuff

[11:59]from that text chain into this world oh okay first of all mexico though first of all that's great

[12:06]that's fantastic let me give you a hint i'm not reading that text chain too closely okay not

[12:10]paying attention what's going on in there if there's any conflicts between other people

[12:13]that's on them okay russell are you free to go to mexico right we can i'm not actually i'm not

[12:20]free i'm not free to go to kansas city with my buddies for a baseball trip or mexico

[12:24]wow i'm going tomorrow's that weekend oh okay wow it's too bad rob can't join me it'd be fun

[12:31]uh well listen uh let's get into today's album this is the most we gotta move on

[12:39]ever breaking up i can't hear you wow yep nope i think it's fine the less i say about this the

[12:49]better okay i'm just gonna say this i love my wife i also love my wife's family

[12:54]okay let's just there's no reason for me to take sides if she heard that all right in 2020 four

[13:03]friends decided to listen to every one of the greatest 500 albums decided by rolling stone

[13:06]magazine this results in a text chain that celebrated the music excoriated the order

[13:09]and led us to make this podcast we are far from experts we promise to do almost no research

[13:13]all opinions are our own unless you disagree just want to alert you guys

[13:17]all-time list today okay so just put that in your tickler file okay we got an all-time list now matt

[13:24]on what's going on here that's got air conditioning speaking of a list can i ask

[13:29]oh he took off his headphones we reached the point where you just assume i'm not gonna send

[13:35]one or do you wait for me not to send what a list uh no i i i i i thought to my actually that that

[13:43]thought occurred i i i i yeah that's what led zeppelin said uh i i i i i i said to myself

[13:52]if russell sends me a list we're gonna do two lists

[13:54]because this list is too good yeah it's a double list we're only doing a single tonight

[13:59]i can take my time it's gonna be a quick night

[14:01]let's go five lists you should see me texting bat it's gonna be a real quick episode we're

[14:07]not gonna digress before we even get through the intro tonight it's gonna be five five episode i

[14:11]think it's a short god short russell i'm so excited that you had said that

[14:15]beck did it better we are all the way up to album 240 wow from 1991

[14:24]oh shoot we are all the way up to album 241 from 1991

[14:30]we have blue lines by massive attack that is so similar to how my wife's friends describe her

[14:40]fetish that she has fetish yeah it's she has a massive attract she's a massive oh massive attract

[14:48]yeah massive attract yeah she likes it is actually true when i started dating my wife i figured out

[14:54]the other day that i was dating my wife and i was like oh my god i'm gonna date my wife and i'm gonna

[14:54]the other guys she had dated fat slobs oh real and i was like she is breaking type this time she is

[15:01]okay i guess that finished but every time i make a joke he gets deleted so i've just stopped

[15:07]making the jokes what jokes what joke what if i deleted a joke of yours well you said you fat you

[15:13]know fat guys or i was gonna say or people like that joke is gonna get deleted so at least bleep

[15:23]over it

[15:24]but so i'm just gonna stop i stopped making those jokes i forgot about that guy you gotta have those

[15:29]long i you know you really gotta reach those pedals you know what's wrong you know what's

[15:33]wrong with me i'm gonna figure out who fingered your guys's wives i think about oh jesus christ

[15:37]wow my problem is i think about that guy not because he because he had a great

[15:41]you could fucking dominate pickup basketball with that mid-range game man it was so smooth

[15:48]and easy that's what i should be trying to do oh

[15:51]that's the worst for

[15:54]email dear sir oh do i pleasure my wife

[16:01]she doesn't seem to like it when i play video games all night and then

[16:07]get mad because i have to record a podcast i ran out of time and i can't do anything with

[16:11]her because i need to prep for the show listen guys there is no parody song today i did not

[16:19]i it did not bring me joy to even think about one so i didn't do it so let's get right into it

[16:23]we've got another guys this is another british band so you know what today is that's right we've

[16:30]got another bloke cast oh we've got a bunch of british blokes making this album now listen

[16:34]if you listen to their names though i've got to agree with what aaron said earlier they sound

[16:41]like a bunch of twats okay here god aaron god aaron why would i say bunch i don't think that's

[16:48]the correct term by the way i'm not sure yeah i think it's bushel okay this recording is led by

[16:53]members grant lee daddy g marshall robert 3d delnaja adrian tricky thaws and andrew mushroom

[17:01]vowels and it's produced by johnny dollar now guys tricky went solo then right after this

[17:07]i don't know he promised to do no research he helped to do that he helped to do that run dmc

[17:12]song aaron is is that what you asked those comedians in that stand-up place you went to

[17:16]a few weeks back like is this the type of response they were getting yeah it's all right

[17:20]yeah

[17:21]yeah hey i have some problems with some airlines too

[17:25]i you know i do think this pack of peanuts are too small sir you're the only person in the audience

[17:36]you're the only person in the history listen we had you sign the wall because you're the only

[17:41]person in the history of this show that's ever been here yeah who's not coming on stage practicing

[17:45]can you imagine their face when aaron said no i don't want to come on stage i'm here to listen

[17:49]they're like oh my god

[17:51]our dream has come true this is gonna happen with this person he's gonna tell two friends

[17:54]they're gonna tell two friends and aaron's never gonna show up again now three friends

[17:58]and you guys have each other and that went out to four people who are forced to listen to the

[18:03]podcast because we asked him about it i've reached the point where i i refer to you guys as co-hosts

[18:07]not friends just strictly on a professional basis so tonight guys tonight is blokes night

[18:14]so i've got three british co-hosts with me assistant hosts i've got

[18:21]matt fish and chips matt in minneapolis matt how are you doing good rob the curiousness

[18:26]of your potential kiss has got my mind and body aching i've got russell the guy with the big hat

[18:34]minneapolis russell how are you doing today rob there's a hole in my soul like a cavity

[18:38]you know any one family member maybe that could fill it for over price

[18:42]over diagnose over price no okay we're gonna move on very quickly and i've got you know russell's

[18:50]bringing that up i i need a crown i think on the on one of my back molars and i don't know what that

[18:55]means by any means and so i feel like we need said person to call and tell me if i really need

[19:02]a crown or not or if that's kind of like a fake thing because i don't know if i really i don't

[19:06]know what it is does anybody know what a crown is on your tooth i think we need to consult i think

[19:11]it's like a fancy we need to call we need that person to call it's like a fancy cavity matt

[19:14]where if they if you don't want it to be silver you gotta pay a lot more that's my understanding

[19:19]good insurance

[19:20]matt if you need a crown i would call bosquette oh that's one for my art heads out there

[19:26]look it up i know another artist there and it's not just picasso now i got bosquette as well

[19:30]hey you know what i would get i'd save some money just get an rc cola

[19:34]hey do your dad this is like you need a crown you'd be like i got one right here

[19:38]where the hell did you get that they've made those in years that's incredible

[19:42]rc is royal crown russell that's why i can see you looking at me with a mystified

[19:46]oh no it's just admiration and i've got aaron

[19:50]aaron

[19:50]and i've got my british co-host aaron big ben the clock not the sex predator quarterback who

[19:56]according to someone under oath has a gray penis and gray is spelled the british way

[20:02]oi you may not have a great big old cadillac gangster white walls tv antennas in the back

[20:09]but be thankful for what you got let's talk about massive attack that's william belson

[20:15]wow aaron that's a great way to get us into the voicemail

[20:19]oh yes

[20:20]now i gotta say we could use some more voicemails okay but this one

[20:30]i don't know i feel like i've heard this caller before

[20:35]uh yeah rob i think you should uh quit that job being a teacher maybe like a voiceover guy or

[20:42]something you got a great voice for radio this is not russ all right thank you caller this is not

[20:49]russ i don't know what you're talking about i don't know what you're talking about i don't know

[20:50]i do have a great voice for radio i appreciate it now listen listen matt there's one thing i'm not

[20:55]going to do at the end of may beginning of june and that is quit teaching i think teaching is the

[21:00]greatest job of all time okay i love every part of it i think it's great it's gonna be really great

[21:06]in about two weeks when you're gonna hear why are you telling me that for molding i could be telling

[21:13]anybody on this show matt you're right i'm telling everybody including that caller okay did you guys

[21:18]do you guys ever did you ever think about it did you ever think about it did you ever think about it

[21:19]did you ever think for a second about going into teaching even for like a millisecond uh i i will

[21:25]just i i don't know i don't know if this is insulting or not it's not meant to be insulting

[21:29]we're about to find out okay yep i didn't get i i was a double major math and econ and i did math

[21:36]and i did okay at math drug down my gpa all that stuff i did it because i could do it actually has

[21:42]been very good for my career to have a have a math and that bank account and what a career oh but

[21:47]and what a career it is and that

[21:49]that hsa account

[21:50]because i because i thought the worst you know if all else fails i can go be a math teacher right

[22:03]and like coach sophomore baseball or something like that like that that was my my fallback that

[22:07]nothing if it didn't work out is that it's all no i have to say that fall back no teaching should

[22:11]be everybody's fallback it was my fallback i actually forgot i applied for teach for america

[22:15]but i didn't get it but that but that what yeah how did you not get

[22:19]you didn't get like a charity job you were the one yeah okay i didn't hire me i don't know i don't

[22:25]know what i said i'm not sure if i should kiss the kids okay sir thank you so much we're good

[22:32]we're good we don't need no i didn't i didn't think i was going to go into teaching i was like

[22:36]oh that'd be a fun way to go live in another city and think i'm doing some good or whatever but no

[22:41]teaching every day like you gotta go in every day and entertain the children and teach them stuff

[22:46]fuck no aaron aaron you can find some good stuff i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know

[22:49]so many videos on amazon prime it's crazy how many videos you could find out about subjects

[22:54]okay now i have to say this is this super dirty that i did this i'm just gonna tell you guys this

[22:59]i'm gonna tell everybody this i think the answer is yes i'm ashamed i'm ashamed that i did this

[23:04]oh my god i teach one of the grades i teach is much is young okay so i don't put as much work

[23:11]into the lesson planning because who cares and apple ran and ran and ran and apple ran there's

[23:17]plenty of time for them to catch up pretty much

[23:19]and they'll just sit there and not say anything like i could teach non-consecutive things every

[23:23]day like i could teach about the wright brothers and then i could teach about like uh uh deep

[23:28]underground you don't really teach about the right brother yes they don't remember but i could

[23:31]my point is i could say i remember yesterday when i talked about the right brothers i didn't say no

[23:35]no and they would never know if i didn't teach they don't care about the order i go in

[23:39]so one day i was like listen i'm teaching about the eyeball because we're dissecting a cow

[23:45]but i've got to teach about an eyeball for like a week i've only got

[23:48]like two days worth of plans what do you teach so i science teacher yes yes so i went on chat gpt

[23:56]and i just wrote it i don't even want i need a lesson plan for fifth grade for today i've got

[24:02]nothing guys it was fucking unbelievable implant one of the best lessons i did all year where i

[24:09]showed a video it gave me a link to a video i showed a video i showed a video about how an eye

[24:13]worked up three minutes listen ironically it was about how an eye worked when i wasn't working

[24:18]that hard at all uh then it did that thing remember those magic eye books it show it said

[24:26]start talking you guys don't remember the magic eye books yes i do remember thank you can everybody

[24:32]at home okay or in the car to work at 6 a.m if you're some psycho from wisconsin listen to this

[24:37]uh russell does not know what the magic eye books are this is what i'm dealing with as a main podcast

[24:43]host i am trying to bring up things and have conversation russell's like i've never heard a

[24:48]magic eye books these are the most one of the most frustrating things of my life what's the is it

[24:53]mall rats that has the scene where the guy can't stop looking at the magic eye post yeah it's look

[24:58]at this russell you know what i'm talking about these pictures are you supposed to like see 3d

[25:03]i could never get them to work but my lesson plan that i kind of created if you think about it i

[25:12]gave the prompt was about these and then how it worked it was and i finally was able to see it it

[25:18]was the best lessons i've ever done for yourself it was a lesson for yourself because you came away

[25:24]with something yes it really was i was like this is unbelievable the kids are like okay and i was

[25:28]like no these books are really big they're like probably not everybody knows of it probably only

[25:32]75 knowing that you're teaching the eye books hey let's get some more mcmahon's in the department

[25:37]of education we need to put an end to this more mcmahon i want to say thank you to a1 for helping

[25:46]me teach so much thank you a1 i appreciate you so much now man more so than what that was in that

[25:52]voicemail it was the timing of that voicemail i got that voicemail it was so weird i got that

[25:56]voicemail at 247 on a monday morning and i noticed yes and i noticed that i think it was the same day

[26:03]that you were giving your wedding speech so i wanted to find out how did that wedding speech go

[26:10]oh well this was my this is my rolling are we in the role you know what might as well get into

[26:14]rolling oh shit rolling going how's it going man it's time to see what everybody's up to

[26:20]it's time for rolling going hey and to all my friends who are teachers out there i'm sorry i

[26:28]told that hey i story i know it makes us sound so lazy but i am i can't help it i'm goddamn lazy

[26:33]now all the teachers have to do it now right why would you not no i would never russell i would

[26:39]never tell a teacher that i did that that i went on my way into work i typed in i need a lesson plan

[26:44]just did that lesson plan that's humiliating but you still had to deliver it if you said it was part

[26:49]of like i mean i i guess i'm with russell why would you not like if wait what if that told you

[26:56]something you didn't know or brought in some oh it did it did it did an unbelievable job the best

[27:01]part of it is when that chat gpt told you to put on that clown outfit with the knife and go in the

[27:05]that's the human touch yeah that's what chat gpt will never you're not gonna get from the energy

[27:12]you'll never see a terminator movie

[27:14]the terminator has put on a clown wig is it hiding in the closet not hiding teaching a class

[27:19]that doesn't sound any better sorry i invited the kids into the dark closet and at the end i put on

[27:26]a clown wig and i had a knife and i turned on the light and i yelled and i thought it was funny

[27:29]and then i turned the light back off to add more fear man

[27:32]speech oh you want me to break it down speech speech speech speech it was horrible no it was

[27:40]absolutely i don't believe this wait wait wait wait okay

[27:44]say more this is so hard for me to hear man and i partially blame rob i partially not really i

[27:53]really don't blame rob so here's the thing right so i send out to the text chain like hey uh joe's

[28:00]wedding's coming up i need you know i gotta give the speech his son's the best man but i'm gonna

[28:05]give the speech blah blah blah you know what can i get so i got all sorts of great sarcastic

[28:10]responses back and then i got one really good one from aaron said hey you can't go around the house

[28:14]with just being 100 sincere and i'm like that's great rob sends a text that says you can't get

[28:21]out funnied by the bridesmaids what did you say like you cannot get out funnied by the bridesmaids

[28:26]gotta go over the top so i you know i tried to sprinkle in a few like funny things oh yeah i was

[28:36]extremely sincere about most of it i typed it up i tried memorizing russell you know i

[28:41]i couldn't memorize it you know i practice listen to it

[28:44]practice practice i practice but here's what i did i did not take into account rob

[28:48]who the crowd was okay so this this that was the one thing that nobody like and i didn't even think

[28:55]about this right so the first time i tried to say something that yeah i'm not lying like i i'm not

[29:00]the funniest person but i do know that if some of these jokes if i said it like to our text chain

[29:05]everybody would laugh oh no right yeah and so and so i tried to i tried to just throw in like a

[29:10]little jab right away like not a bad one at all it's not perverted is it

[29:14]no no not at all not it's just it was about joe but like there was not that many like none of the

[29:21]none of the college guys are there right early into the high school guys that were there kind

[29:24]of a thing so it was a lot of inside jokes and you didn't have inside and then a lot of

[29:30]her family and stuff like that and it wasn't even a bit but it was like i realized people

[29:34]maybe don't even really know joe all that well kind of a thing right and like i've known him

[29:38]since i was six yeah and we went to high school grade school in high school we played three sports

[29:42]together went to college you know and i was like oh my god i'm gonna go to high school i'm gonna go to

[29:44]you know he grew up across the street from me coached by kim near lucky wait did he play

[29:48]basketball no hockey oh god you know he played basketball yeah he i mean he was probably the

[29:53]tallest guy in rich i didn't know he was yeah man you know so that was one of the jokes i said

[29:57]you know if you can't find any of the rich show people were all the five seven guys with short

[30:02]hair and you know things like you know you went richfield humor richfield humor matt that sounds

[30:08]like a great joke to me okay i'm gonna back you up here okay so but there was only two other rich

[30:14]there and then you know joe's brother is like five nine so i said well you know and joe's brother

[30:18]is like our king because he's like five nine the rest of us are five seven things like that i love

[30:24]it so it's the instant the instant that there was like a minute chuckle as opposed to like a little

[30:33]just i just wanted a little bit of laugh i just went completely white i went like what is a sheet

[30:38]kind of a thing like well that's how i felt i don't know how i looked or whatever i lost my

[30:43]place i'm

[30:44]messing this up i'm messing i mean so like it ultimately it was like fine right but it was

[30:49]nowhere near what i thought it would be it was not good man can i just say this number one i'm

[30:55]sure you did better than you think everybody probably did but but i i have thought about it

[31:00]for days number two as somebody who occasionally has that happen to him my recommendation would be

[31:08]to just go dirty just right away we're going dirty as we can break out that aaron twat's joke i did

[31:14]think it'd be good stuff okay you gotta live up that crowd you gotta just go for it they're not

[31:18]gonna remember you they'll remember you once you say twat during the wedding speech i guarantee it

[31:22]so here's my tips for anybody who has to do this ever again kind of here's my tips i absolutely

[31:29]think you got to go with aaron's recommendation to be as sincere as possible i i'd go one i'd go

[31:34]one step further and i'd say like you gotta maybe like warm up by like thanking a bunch of people

[31:40]and then saying how you know how good the bride looks and how beautiful she is and

[31:44]what you know what a great job planning all this stuff things like that i mean that dress makes

[31:48]her look amazing i cannot believe but like i think you gotta you gotta kind of ease into it right you

[31:56]gotta ease into it a little bit and thanking everybody and complimenting like the setup and

[32:00]all this stuff and then just go and don't and by god you gotta think about who the crowd is because

[32:06]that that was my one thing that i just completely you thought you had a rich a land full of richfield

[32:12]guys in the audience i did i did you know and then oh no so i mean i i felt i i still i don't

[32:18]feel bad and i've told joe i'm like joe i'm sorry i have to jump in here yep matt sent a picture of

[32:27]him and joe who his wedding it was study picture they looked matt and aaron said this in the text

[32:32]other people matt looked as sharp as a 44 year old man or however old you are 43 44 could ever

[32:39]look at a wedding matt yeah a hundred percent

[32:42]you looked amazing like i'm just saying if something doesn't work out with your wife

[32:45]you throw that picture up on tinder and you are going to get so much point you know it's it's good

[32:51]it's and we know this right it's good for your wife to see pictures like that just to know yeah

[32:56]just so they know you could pull back matt you would pull we know how russell feels about

[33:00]committed relationships not a real thing okay it's just a just a technicality yeah he feels

[33:06]he can get around it's just a way to get a little bit off of your rent yeah somebody else said

[33:09]a little bit of a way to get a little bit off of your rent

[33:12]here we go we're out tonight we were having dinner and i noticed there's a guy he went set

[33:17]down um we were at cove matt in um edina that's probably off of of york and uh 494 in york i would

[33:28]say between france and south edina pan yeah yeah i'm trying so mad doesn't know where it is i don't

[33:36]know where cove is i was sitting outside guy comes and he's sitting down for a while by himself and

[33:42]all of a sudden lady comes in oh that's not 70th that's right next to the

[33:46]galleria you know online first meeting online date right in front of us i couldn't stop thinking

[33:55]about what what was going on i don't know i think they were i think they were both uh whack jobs so

[34:00]i don't know okay so no one could have nice done well with either of them so we we went out to

[34:06]dinner tonight russell sarah's birthday is in a couple days we went as a family went to rosalia

[34:12]jenny went there once with us the pizza place and uh um what do they call it lyndon hills i paid for

[34:17]that if i recall there was a lady who was sitting there and she had a glass of wine and a pizza and

[34:22]was reading a book and sarah and i both just looked at each other like what a fucking saturday that is

[34:28]right yeah yeah well how great is it just to be reading a book on the patio rosalia having a pizza

[34:35]drinking a glass of wine that's marvelous wonderful wonderful and she's like so and she's like i'm

[34:39]here and my husband wouldn't come out with me because we were at a wedding last night we heard

[34:43]one of the worst speeches we've ever heard in our entire life yeah we broke up yeah we can't go on

[34:49]we realized it was it was painful guys like i thought about it i thought about it it was just

[34:58]painful and i feel bad you weren't capable enough of bombing you you might not have done it the way

[35:04]you wanted to but i know you well enough to know that you you don't have the capability to bomb i

[35:09]but it was not it wasn't what you say it was not good it was not up to standard i hear you if that

[35:15]makes sense can i i'll just tell you the worst speech i've ever given and that is i a place i

[35:20]worked for one year oh i forgot about that part oh boy hey the boss take your headphones off

[35:26]what hey man what where what are the odds uh rob had no business giving this speech

[35:30]whatever he's going to talk pretty high this sounds like something he should not have been

[35:34]i'm gonna guess no one invited him to give a speech yeah

[35:37]rob you can put it back

[35:40]tell us about that speech uh now i was told and i remember this quite clearly that it was a roast

[35:49]of this boss who was leaving now the boss had been working there for a long time an elementary

[35:54]school principal no you can't no i came in scorching hot on the roast no scorching i go

[36:03]hey you know she's an elementary school principal because she's got that haircut that the rest of

[36:07]you do in here and i'm like oh my god i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna do that

[36:07]now upper school and middle school teachers that joke is scorching hot fire that is white hot

[36:15]everybody loves that joke elementary school teachers not a good joke and it turned out it

[36:19]was not a roast and i realized it almost immediately it had to kind of change track

[36:23]about halfway through but matt that was my biggest bomb of all time russell what was

[36:27]your biggest bomb of all time uh i think i told you guys a while back i tried to do funny stuff

[36:33]at a professional event in front of like 500 people and it and it just it went horribly

[36:37]wrong and i'm like oh my god i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna do that

[36:37]but i just you got to keep plowing forward i think it's true you got to own it

[36:41]aaron what about you what's your biggest bomb it was at the top gun bit you did at work was

[36:48]it the john henry i think i think yeah i think the top gun i think the top gun bit at work was

[36:54]pretty bad you know uh i mean this should have been a subject for a real ago but i did

[36:59]recently start a team oh you guys are gonna hate me i started a team meeting with a five minute

[37:04]mindfulness no a guided meditation

[37:07]i did i started our team meeting i said hey if this isn't your thing that's fine you can log out

[37:13]for five minutes and come back but we're gonna do a five minute guided meditation and then move on

[37:19]with our meeting so i don't know that probably popped i don't know but definitely the top gun

[37:23]bit bombed was it anybody but you in that meeting at that point i would have i would have logged off

[37:30]forcefully you know what i mean like have them somehow thrown the phone down where everybody

[37:34]could see it i mean like this is the guy they promoted the senior manager yeah upper middle

[37:40]management in a virtual world this guy does not want to fly southwest anymore yeah oh so bad how

[37:48]often how often do you hold these meetings uh once a month once a week every day every other

[37:53]week i meet with my direct reports every other week okay are you gonna are you gonna ever try

[37:58]to do that again no uh i might because i like it like i

[38:04]enjoy the five minutes and like you're the boss yeah you will listen to every word i say

[38:09]yeah i mean i it's it's every other week for 45 minutes if you can't like enjoy five minutes of

[38:15]like okay i had to log into this meeting and now if i don't like this breathing exercise i can

[38:18]you know i'm like that's fine this is not my type of thing but i've done this type of thing

[38:24]at work events before and to me if you can't be introspective and think and have something

[38:30]productive come of it from yourself during that time you got to look in the

[38:34]fucking mirror and even if it's even if it's not your style you it's on you if you can't get

[38:40]something out of that i want to send a message out to all of our working man listeners and women

[38:45]okay unlike some of these guys earlier who are disrespectful technically are you a working man

[38:50]during the summer or what would you consider yourself right now because definitely you were

[38:54]working but i think you were on a vacation so i i don't really know how that works well yeah this

[38:59]last week i had to take the week off for powerlessness but listen i want to talk to the blue collar people

[39:04]sorry that you're listening to boss speak on here where they're telling you that you need to be

[39:08]introspective you need i guarantee you if any of these bums got into a meeting and the boss made

[39:12]him close their eyes for five minutes they'd be pissed as hell about it okay but because they're

[39:16]the boss they think it's god's gift to plant meeting planning that you are sitting there for

[39:20]five minutes thinking to yourself how much you hate meetings okay now that being said of course

[39:26]uh i do also run meetings uh once every two weeks at my job and i mostly use it to tell jokes okay

[39:34]i have got jokes written down i am testing out some new material that is totally different that's

[39:40]fun everybody actually loves it they've never complained about it so i've got a daily meeting

[39:44]because we go over different things like our small group yeah every day every day at 10 o'clock kind

[39:49]of a thing but we've been doing it for like five years now right and so if you're in the office

[39:53]you're not traveling things like that you're you know working from home we log in at 10 o'clock to

[39:57]talk about what's going on with this stuff and i'm at the point it's been five years right so if the

[40:03]boss is five minutes late and i'm at the point it's been five years right so if the boss is five minutes

[40:04]late or somebody you know is three minutes late we don't have to fill the time we can just sit

[40:08]there and wait but there's one guy that always has to be like uh so anybody catch the golf match

[40:15]and like he's not a golfer he's just trying to like talk and i'm like good fucking god yeah

[40:20]give it up just sit there and answer some emails or something while we wait for everybody to get

[40:27]here kind of a thing so what's wrong with that no i'd be checking fantasy baseball though just so

[40:34]you feel good by the way you've got killing it tariq scooble carrying two of my teams back

[40:40]market down detroit now russell i have to ask you with this talk of sports yeah bring it on

[40:46]are you what's going on what's going on in the household right now we've had a major shift the

[40:52]timberwolves are officially out how are things going right now in the russell household rob

[40:58]honestly they're going pretty well because as you know the world of like nba podcasting cares way

[41:03]more about the offseason than they do about the NBA podcast and cares way more about the offseason

[41:04]the actual games so we're now into free agency salary cap the second yes keep randall wow it's

[41:14]gotten very real today i signed a rant when we were at cove tonight i i heard a lot about maybe

[41:19]mike conley retiring i said i don't think he's going to retire he's going to take but he should

[41:23]retire might not retire he's going to take that 15 million dollars there's a lot of thoughts rob

[41:28]some people think we don't need does read or julius randall get rid

[41:34]of both of them right wow russell hey to all you uh timberwolves people out there i'll see you at

[41:39]the beginning of next year's playoffs okay good to see the timberwolves for a little bit watch

[41:43]them for about uh eight nine games this year about what i normally do and i will see you again so

[41:48]rolling going rest how's it going with me i'm doing good guys i got two things i wanted to

[41:52]run by you first first i realized that tonight i ordered a couple of them i think i'm a margarita

[41:59]guy oh yes yes i was never a margarita guy

[42:03]oh yes i was never a margarita guy oh yes i was never a margarita guy oh yes i was never a margarita

[42:04]guy i don't like tequila to me tequila has a funk to it there's a smell to it that has always been

[42:10]off putting the funk with a nasty dunk so i have never been a margarita guy and uh probably four

[42:17]or five months ago and i was in arizona for some work things they had these amazing margaritas with

[42:21]different flavors good margaritas in arizona you're right good margaritas yeah and i've been

[42:26]to a few bars recently and i've been starting to order margaritas more and more i ordered some

[42:31]margaritas tonight they were fantastic i think i'm a margarita guy i don't like tequila i don't

[42:34]margarita guy what are you guys margarita guys russell i'm gonna go a step farther than you

[42:39]i'm just gonna say it right now and i'm gonna say it full-throated and i'm gonna say it proud

[42:43]i'm a frozen margarita guy give me a frozen margarita you know i'm a mush head put that

[42:50]mush in my mouth let's go i'm a mush head through and through i think i don't even need the mush head

[42:56]i i'm you know what it is for me now i want some sort of weird salt oh yeah

[43:01]give me the yeah yes yeah

[43:04]i love it i'm not a tahine fan on there i i i can drink margaritas with the best of right i never

[43:11]order them though unless i'm in like dallas on a work trip or somebody else is like we're doing

[43:14]marks and i'm like okay they gotta be good but i never think to order one but i always get them

[43:19]when i'm in dallas for some reason i think a spicy margarita on a hot day is the perfect that's it

[43:23]like that's the best you can't do better than that if you're in the desert spicy mark not too spicy

[43:27]just like a little bit of spice i will say this though russell margaritas might be right up there

[43:33]with martinis i'm not gonna lie i'm not gonna lie i'm not gonna lie i'm not gonna lie

[43:34]where the if you have one too many you are in a world of hurt world of pain because not only

[43:40]are you suffering the alcohol poisonings okay that's so many of succumb to so quickly nowadays

[43:44]you are also suffering from what i call margarita mouth where you have been you have drank

[43:50]approximately a whole bottle of sour mix without realizing it it has torn up the insides of your

[43:55]mouth you feel like absolute shit russell what are your thoughts on that i hadn't even thought

[43:59]about that i had a dragon fruit margarita tonight it was great did i say i got i had

[44:04]dragon fruit in my fruit queen box last summer did i tell you guys that no i had actual dragon

[44:09]fruit in the house is that the spiky one that smells really bad no no no that's uh durian that's

[44:15]dragon fruit is dragon spiky dragon yeah dragon bite that's out of your face how was the dragon

[44:20]i also gotta i mean i don't want to be fancy highfalutin margarita guy but you can yeah if

[44:27]you're drinking like don't drink margs with sweet and sour mix like don't drink don't drink margarita

[44:32]mix drink russell margarita

[44:34]lime juice with agave like drink a real margarita you gotta go top shelf too yeah they go cadillac

[44:39]i i've made it i i would probably had less than five margaritas in my life until the last six

[44:46]months i think it's my new thing i like them oh it's a good choice you've moved on from espresso

[44:50]martinis to margaritas well i can't say that you know man that's the real key to espresso martinis

[44:56]i'm gonna give you guys a world that you don't even i'm a decaf espresso martini

[45:04]i don't want to be up till three or four in the morning because like i had a few espresso martinis

[45:10]and most bars don't have them spoon and stable down in the north loop area rob that's right

[45:17]off like if you do the 394 exit wow pass washington a little bit decaf and the upstairs

[45:24]roommate has been ordering us decaf espresso if we need it i'm a decaf espresso martini russell

[45:30]i don't know anybody who has come so far on the espresso path as you

[45:34]have since the beginning of this podcast when you were just not doing it at all and now

[45:38]you like the taste of espresso so much that you're getting it without the main benefit

[45:43]which is the caffeine yes oh that's crazy to me one other thing i had to share with you guys

[45:48]before we move on to rob i had uh some my cousins over some uh family members over and they brought

[45:55]their kids over the other day and i i don't have kids i'm not like you guys i don't have toys i

[46:04]got wrestling figures kids rip out a couple of those pictures out of that hulk hulgin magazine

[46:08]if you're bored you know what i mean so one of my cousin's kids uh super sweet kid but very nice

[46:13]kid very sharp and everything probably four i'm guessing um the only thing i could think that

[46:20]would maybe be entertaining is help uncle russ put some records on the record player yes nice

[46:24]they were into it yeah all of a sudden now though my my toner arm is not working right

[46:34]i was gonna ask you guys and this is nothing wrong with him but like we reached the point

[46:38]where he wanted to do dance parties so we're flipping these records like every you know 30

[46:42]seconds right right we're putting a new one on we're putting a new one on youtube when when when

[46:47]when an ipad kid meets a record player russell he's in for a hard lesson yeah and so we we changed a

[46:53]bunch of them we we put a ton of new ones on over probably a half hour we probably put seven eight

[46:59]of them out we were putting them on constantly and i was kind of soon you got to grab it by the size

[47:04]of the plastic yeah that shit doesn't bother me it's not the end of the world but but part of me

[47:08]was wondering i was like then but at the end like the toner arm wasn't working at all and now i've

[47:12]got to try to rebalance it and that's so god dang hard it's so complicated tough yeah and so what i

[47:18]was going to ask you guys is matt and aaron you guys have record players you have kids are is the

[47:22]record player off limits for your kids or how does that work no no i mean yeah it's not off limits

[47:30]and when my son was about that age he was really good about it he was like following directions

[47:34]he was great he loved the ritual of it we played records a lot and then he got to a point where he

[47:40]couldn't really follow directions and wasn't handling it and now like we haven't he hasn't

[47:45]played a record with me for maybe two years because it was just like it's it lost the

[47:49]shine and also he just like wasn't it wasn't fun for him because it was like oh now dad's just

[47:54]yelling at me again matt we've got one down here that we we play a lot and then we were at an

[48:04]end of the show and i'm like oh my god he's really into it now he's really into records nice he's

[48:07]nine get about turn 10 it's over his birthday don't tell him russell okay i know you guys talk

[48:12]getting him a record player he's that much into it with some yes some records i think getting

[48:17]the lumineers and fits in the tantrum and somebody else i've got a couple extra copies of the big

[48:22]bopper if you need it i like that lumineers tune on the zach bryan um yeah russell was your was

[48:28]this four-year-old guest mystified when one of the records was a naked woman holding a cat was

[48:33]there any kind of question

[48:34]about that he didn't get that one i will say that the most of the records made it about a song and

[48:39]then we would switch it the first one i i'm trying here the first one i got out is one of my all-time

[48:46]favorites it's dr teeth in the electric mayhem i'm like this has got to be right up the alley

[48:50]for a russell russell as a parent with kids yeah i can tell you one of the greatest mistakes you

[48:58]could ever make is trying to show something to a kid that you like it is there is nothing as hard

[49:04]they will immediately not like it yeah when i show my kids like the naked gun movies and they're

[49:11]bored after five minutes i'm like what have i done what have i done to deserve this life how am i so

[49:15]bad i feel like well i feel like abraham in the bible so and meanwhile they're just asking for

[49:21]like ferris bueller again and you're like i hate that no if my kids ask for ferris bueller they

[49:25]would be out of the apartment okay we put a few of them on eventually we hit the supremes was the one

[49:31]wow where we put diana ross and the supremes on and we put a few of them on and we put a few of

[49:34]them on and he was down with that and there was a lot of dance and so it we had this world of dance

[49:40]party but when we hit the mute when we stopped the music it's a new person in and then it's a new

[49:46]person and so it's constant dance party but my toner arm got a little off and it's not it's my

[49:50]own fault because i thought this would be the most entertaining way to like engage a kid but now i've

[49:56]got to figure out how to set my tone it probably was but then now it's not now you got to figure

[50:00]it out after yeah in fact russell life pro tip

[50:04]uh i found that harry belafonte specifically

[50:07]it's a big one for littler kids to keep their attention they like that one a few other harry

[50:16]belafonte so i got you man we're only going rob how's it going with you let me tell you what

[50:21]i was in the wrong it is crazy yeah aaron you'll never teach for america

[50:29]i need to give aaron props on one what's that

[50:34]we've talked about how i've one of my favorite shows is top chef yeah there's been a lot of show

[50:40]almost on a day weekly basis on top chef they make fish with fish skin so you guys don't eat it there

[50:46]i i pity you but i will say this last night one of the this is one of the final five people on

[50:54]top chef had a disc featuring dandelion greens yes wow the bitterness i don't like shit they

[51:00]like the bitterness the earthiness did they let me russell did they were

[51:04]they were saying aaron you have to know do they hate it did they say this is the shittiest thing

[51:08]i've ever eaten in my entire life but what they were saying aaron is you have to have something

[51:12]sweet to offset the bitterness okay of the dandelion greens if you're okay and what tom

[51:17]calicchio the head judge was saying and like the one-on-one was you've got to have something that's

[51:22]going to offset the bitterness because it's too bitter yeah wow so and he didn't know what that

[51:26]was going to be and eventually she found some honey or something that offset it so you gotta

[51:30]you gotta offset the bitterness aaron okay okay man

[51:34]matt can you imagine can you imagine how bitter we would be if we were at a table and we were

[51:38]served dandelion greens we would be the most bitter thing at the table for sure correct i like

[51:42]i like i like to go i mean i like i can see i can see it serving with the skin on like cooking with

[51:48]it on things like that i would just normal people eat just skin your skin is good guys we're not

[51:53]doing the same where i'm putting a halt to this bit i don't think i've ever done that on the show

[51:57]listen okay as you guys know i was out in reno this week

[52:02]biggest city for

[52:04]powerlifting nationals

[52:05]and i had dinner with magic mike 69

[52:12]we had dinner together amazing okay i went i went there and i said i said to the place can we just

[52:19]do plastic knives please no no real knives on the table okay because i was talking to a friend of

[52:25]mine and jenny's i said yeah because jenny's like so we're walking back with jay's friend and i go

[52:28]i gotta go to dinner and the friend said to jenny well are you going and jenny goes no he's being a

[52:33]fan of his friend and i said yeah i gotta go to dinner and the friend said to jenny well are you

[52:34]going to listen to the podcast i'm not and the woman was like what i'm gonna listen to the podcast

[52:39]and i was like no you should not listen to the podcast and she did she ended up listening to it

[52:43]very sad what episode i don't know she didn't get back to me with much information she just said she

[52:48]listened to it now turns out guys i had a blast with mike we had a great time out to dinner

[52:58]it was an absolute blast we had a great time and now just because i've said that twice does

[53:03]that mean i can't think of any specifics about what we talked about no do you know how he found

[53:08]us like so he used the origin story that was so first of all let me just say this right away i'm

[53:14]just gonna say this right away i paid for dinner okay i big-timed him i came in high over the top

[53:20]i'm just gonna say that right away also i have to say i have to admit this i was five minutes late

[53:25]okay and here's why i didn't tell mike this but i'm gonna say it now there's a secret

[53:29]you were you were we know we

[53:33]agreed to meet at a burger place that was close to my hotel in my head this meant he was gonna

[53:40]pick me up in my car at the hotel drive me to the burger place even though that was never said in

[53:46]the text messages but in my head it was simply oh you're gonna pick me up so he texted me i'm in my

[53:50]hotel lobby and he said i'm on the couch and i was like oh okay i know there's nobody here i said oh

[53:55]and he goes oh i'm at the couch at the burger place and i was like oh this burger place is 10

[54:01]minutes away by walk i gotta get a car i had to get a

[54:03]three-star burger place and i was like oh i'm at the couch at the burger place and i was like oh

[54:03]three-minute car rushed over there blamed my wife for being late oh no but on the way over i was

[54:10]kind of like what kind of burger place is a couch what's going on here where am i what is he taking

[54:14]me to a swingers club is it a ranch yeah are we going to be giving the eiffel tower to some woman

[54:19]no the answer was no he took me to a delicious burger place that he later admitted to me

[54:25]was a place he took first dates very often oh that's so love it go love it that's how much

[54:30]respect he has for you it was a great time

[54:33]it was a great time

[54:33]we got burgers we talked and i did say i asked him a couple questions number one how did you start

[54:38]listening to us and it turns out that he loves podcasts about lists he was listening to the

[54:45]other rolling stone 500 podcast that's still doing the original list by the way you should

[54:50]check out the inner sandman podcast but my greatest metallica songs rank one to ten thousand

[54:55]oh guys i cannot tell you how much we talked about the podcast we talked about i mean all this stuff

[55:03]but he said he was listening to that he's also listening to a podcast where they're doing the

[55:06]top thousand albums to listen to i was like god damn those guys must be psycho who's ever doing

[55:11]that one and so we chatted about that i told him the big secret of the podcast which he said yes i

[55:18]already knew that i forgot that a long time ago i was like oh okay i guess every okay no i think

[55:23]it's pretty obvious i just think the people that don't get it are dumb fucks oh well that might

[55:28]that might be true and then what we really chatted about uh after i showed him pictures of you

[55:33]and then he drew pictures of you and put on lipstick and said i'm going to meet them someday

[55:38]so i was kind of worried about that but i did show pictures of me he said the only person who

[55:43]didn't look like what he thought was uh matt he and he pictured matt as more and i'm going to say

[55:52]it is more of a steve that steve type that's how he pictured man just from the voice and the way

[55:58]he talked he pictures as a steve now he was not surprised at all to see me it seemed like he had

[56:03]been he had been a steve type guy and i was like oh my god he's a steve type guy and i was like

[56:03]i have been described uh pretty closely and russell he had it pretty much down as well

[56:08]but uh well i so well i'll say aaron he had cyber stalked earlier because he said that there was

[56:13]only one aaron following beck did it better on twitter and it was just aaron he was like oh i

[56:16]figured this out guys bald as fuck so we've done pretty well and you know sort of hiding yeah i

[56:23]mean like yeah russell's uncle famously thinks that we're nuts for the bond of information we

[56:28]we put out there things like that but i think he was like one of the first like 10 albums he

[56:33]called it a steve type guy and he was like oh my god i'm gonna be like a steve type guy and i'm

[56:33]called in to correct us or something you just lit him up and then you sort of call it because

[56:37]his name is not and he's got a username and i don't want to out him he can out of himself it's

[56:41]that's not magic mike it's mike something or other in a different number so you just sort of call him

[56:45]magic mike 69 yeah i asked him about that and he said you know when i posted those corrections to

[56:51]you because he just listens to these list music podcasts at work because well anyway he said when

[56:56]i posted that i thought i was being funny and you got really mad that doesn't sound like me

[57:03]too you sent us a picture of you and magic mike and i noticed i noticed because i again

[57:09]i used to follow magic mike 69 on instagram he looks like a taller guy and i noticed you just

[57:16]happened to take a picture where it makes it look like you're

[57:19]i towered over magic bike it wasn't even close

[57:24]you didn't tower over anybody

[57:28]oh

[57:28]mike andriotti or whatever that guy's name was he had some

[57:33]long ass femurs russell that's because i was not higher up on the podium if i had been higher up on

[57:38]the podium i would have looked much taller but for some reason i was pretty low down on the podium

[57:42]compared to where i normally am all right i got even my wife looked taller than me i'll just put

[57:46]it that way before you get before you get back into it how long are how long are you and magic

[57:50]mike out for dinner like over an hour and a half oh yeah two or three hours yeah and you had fun

[57:55]yeah and finally i said i have to go i'm tired oh i had a blast and it turns out no hold up this is

[58:01]the night before you have to lift

[58:03]yes a hundred percent god wow yeah oh yeah you're dedicated no i

[58:07]oh what else am i gonna do just sit there and think about oh

[58:10]you have to weigh in the night before you're allowed to have a burger

[58:12]oh no no weigh-ins having a burger having a great time and it turns out that one thing that magic

[58:19]mike loved to do was uh we knew that he was a first of all it was interesting because he told

[58:25]me he listens to music where he'll get onto a band and then just listen to every album of

[58:29]theirs chronologically yeah so he's like you know i'll get into like i do that often yeah

[58:33]i get into widespread panic i'll just listen to every album i'll listen to this but it turns out

[58:37]that he went to school he talked about him for being a sound engineer so for about an hour and

[58:42]a half we talked about that and then he talked to me about how different albums are engineered

[58:47]differently from cd to vinyl yeah which is actually going to come up today i'm telling you

[58:51]the whole time i was like if aaron was here he would be creaming his dirty little jeans

[58:57]listening to this story he would be so happy i'd be way into it man it was an absolute blast to talk to

[59:03]him about how you know what what your goal is as a sound engineer like we talked more about sound

[59:07]engineering than the podcast did he did he did he compliment the sound quality of the podcast did he

[59:12]did he say that i you know what i noticed he did i kept saying he didn't mention aaron's mic in the

[59:16]early episodes he's kind of like i noticed aaron's and i said yeah i said that the problem was he

[59:21]didn't listen to the episode so he didn't know but yeah yeah i i tried to get him to say like oh

[59:25]didn't i do a good job eqing and maybe setting up the compression he did not take the bait on that

[59:29]i have to know i have to know okay we kissed oh

[59:33]so when you just one tongue though when you spent like 45 minutes talking about like his

[59:40]sound engineering you've got to be thinking why are we not talking about the podcast

[59:44]no no i know absolutely not absolutely not no we talked plenty about the podcast we talked we we

[59:51]really did we talked about you know because i used to talk about editing it and kind of and

[59:55]we got into the sound mixing we had a great time like he really was a fascinating guy

[59:59]and uh i legitimately had a great time and i'm not just saying that

[60:02]because i know he's listening okay so that's wow thank you mike for hanging out with rob

[60:07]yeah now he also has my personal phone number so i gotta think about that a little bit too

[60:11]okay rob now we also need to move on beyond magic mike yes you competed against other people

[60:17]this time typically you're the only guy in your weight class i need to hear how it went

[60:22]uh well my second squat i almost i went down for my squat with about 710 pounds on my back

[60:28]and then the floor kept getting closer and closer and it turned out which is not what's

[60:32]supposed to be happening and it turns out that's because i was falling forward and i almost fell on

[60:37]my face with 700 pounds it's never happened before i've never experienced that once it was one of the

[60:42]scariest things i know it was scary because my wife was filming it and the moment i started

[60:45]falling forward the camera stops and i'm like this is why we'll never be famous if i was going to get

[60:50]killed squatting this would be a great viral video you posted videos about oh i felt my second squat

[60:56]in the scariest way possible and i'm thinking like oh god is this going to be because i don't know if

[60:59]i could watch it but there's no video of that no they caught me right away i'm like oh my god i'm

[61:02]but it was like a big time so my squat sucked compared to normal god i had a great bench

[61:07]and then i had to get a third deadlift up to get second place because second place i would have

[61:11]got invited to north american championships i was not going to get first place i'll just put it this

[61:15]way there was a guy who showed up beat me with all of his openers just his openers he put him

[61:19]on the board and i was like well that's the end of that for our listeners though rob sent us the

[61:24]video i watched i probably said you had nine lifts rob in the one day is that right i think i saw

[61:29]seven of the nine lift i saw almost all of them very sweet

[61:32]and rob you did an amazing job and you are the best the a number one showman of any of these

[61:37]lifters out there without question you you bring the pain but god damn there are some big fucking

[61:43]dudes in this thing like rob looks like a small little man compared to some of the guys you're

[61:49]competing against and i'm being respectful by saying that but and rob's a lot stronger than

[61:54]we think he is yes yeah not as strong as i thought i was apparently but yeah it was uh russell this

[62:00]the masters what happens is

[62:02]because i keep getting older okay it turns out younger guys also get older and these young guys

[62:08]are coming in it turns out they're incredibly strong and they actually take the sport pretty

[62:12]seriously to the point where the guy warming up next to me uh he had a huge silver chain on that

[62:18]had to have been at least two kilos he was he was wearing a huge silver chain he also had a belt

[62:23]that said tonio the titan on the back i was like oh that's not good that's a very bad sign when

[62:32]it comes to weight aaron i'm going to show you this overall all right okay is this it yeah so

[62:38]here it is aaron 327 kilos how many pounds 730 probably in this before you got the third time

[62:49]you got this you got this weight i've easily gotten this before this should be easy and in

[62:52]fact for my third it was really really easy yeah notice notice come up let me talk notice rob

[62:58]comes out in the court he's not standing there waiting like a little bitch a lot of

[63:02]these guys are standing out there like this is a wrestling entrance you have to come out with the

[63:07]fucking like force of the world behind you and the fury and some of these guys are like standing

[63:12]out there peeking around for like 10 minutes and like is it my time to come out and leave now

[63:17]rob is a monster now you do have a minute to lift russell and i am behind a screen and i will

[63:22]sometimes even when they say the bar is loaded you wait you make oh you make i'll make him tell

[63:27]me twice i wait for that pop everybody starts yelling and i go out and i give a

[63:32]mighty roar and i want to hear it i give a mighty roar now so many people in powerlifting come out

[63:38]and they just don't do anything they just it's very european they come out they do the lift

[63:42]they just show no emotion whatever not me when i came out for my first deadlift i pointed at my

[63:47]watch and i said it's time to deadlift baby let's go when i hit my third squat i blew into the dice

[63:52]and i rolled it because i've been reno baby blow oh yeah so look watch this see if you can hear

[63:57]this roar now i'm going to give you a hint the number one person you're going to hear is somebody

[64:02]else who got first place the day before and is a national champion so congratulations to my coach

[64:09]are there guys just like hitting on her left and right like yes that's the national champion from

[64:13]yesterday no all the all the guys that were in her fetish weight class were actually lifting at

[64:17]the time so she was just she told me she was just kidding okay never mind oh here we go let's i was

[64:24]wondering why she was drinking the gatorade that's all i'm going to say here's the deal

[64:27]oh yeah so there's so much more energy yeah

[64:32]yeah so you can hear me now listen a guy comes out like that he's gotta know how to

[64:36]fall no problem he must have done this hundreds of times and is not worried about it there's no

[64:42]way that he is a set the rack up too high so this walkout is going to be one of the worst things

[64:47]you're ever going to see in your entire life and b doesn't know where to look so he's looking too

[64:51]low hence tipping himself over even though he's done this literally hundreds of times watch this

[64:56]yeah way too tall that's like almost over his head that's like that's all

[65:02]sign up for russell now at this point at this point by the way i should point out i did look

[65:08]at the spotters before i did go out that's one because i always check who it is they are older

[65:12]guys they are bigger guys i have been spotted by literal children before not as confident building

[65:17]my for my second lift i have written the a's on each knee sleeve for one for each child i noticed

[65:22]that i'm about to honor them by definitely not falling over during the squad i was super annoyed

[65:29]i was like if you could do that you could put our goddamn logo on something

[65:32]you know what i bet i can put the logo on your ass you could have it would you're wearing that

[65:38]waldo shirt and everything underneath that thing you could have put our logo on something no it's

[65:42]not a worse well it's a magic eye shirt russell you just never have seen it before you know where's

[65:46]waldo and not magic eye i don't get what books you were buying at home russell do you know who

[65:50]lowly worm is i had no clue what you're oh my god i this is what is going on i gotta see this

[65:55]i got it yeah oh richard scurry because he was in prison got a knife fight now here's the deal

[66:02]watch so now watch this unwrap brutal yeah oh yeah that was yeah that's refreshing on your spine

[66:12]you can see right away you're already looking at my face your head's turning red not good i do look

[66:17]like a firecracker that's about to go off i look like a cigarette you know what i look like i mean

[66:22]big and fat and weird places at a big redhead i look a lot like my penis yeah i look a lot like

[66:27]my penis i thought you'd say a boston baked bean that looks like a boston it does it's got that belt

[66:32]wrapped around it yeah it's trying to stay as tight as possible for as long as it can this is

[66:39]my penis and it's about to disappoint by falling forward so let's see what happens here and also

[66:45]it's holding up hundreds of pounds i mean russell this is so much like my penis it's crazy yeah

[66:48]oh okay okay yeah so it wasn't too scary they caught me right away but in your mind that's

[67:02]because what happens yeah you fall forward there's no safeties during the meet there's no nothing to

[67:08]catch me so then you just get pinned so then no it'll crush my head it'll kill me yeah it'll crush

[67:14]the back of my head and kill me there's no way it won't i mean maybe i'll be able but i can't shrug

[67:18]off 700 pounds no right oh god you have to hope hope it rolls yeah i did notice imagine me not

[67:25]being able to talk about massive attack the world would warn aaron rolling going i was going with

[67:32]it that was part of the previous the pre-rolling going conversation uh it's really going good i you

[67:38]know russell asked us maybe three two or three weeks ago what we would do if we had a whole day

[67:44]off to ourselves and as luck would have it that has happened to me twice since russell asked that

[67:50]question so russell i would not meet robin reno any it wasn't on the day that rob was in reno that

[67:57]was right that was i feel sad about that that was wallace's last day of school so i was doing last day

[68:02]of school stuff i had to go to the last day of school picnic instead of meeting robin reno but

[68:07]russell if there's anything else you want to add you know ask for like uh ask us about that might

[68:12]like then eventually come to fruition but i was going to tell you guys what i did on my yeah days

[68:16]to myself yeah what would it be like to if i'm not gonna make that joke go ahead aaron yeah so

[68:25]last sunday uh the previous friday i kind of had a tough day at work and i uh i texted anna and i

[68:32]shut down a meeting because i told people there's marginal utility and talking about this anymore

[68:36]and i said i need a break she was like that's up for me that's upper middle management talk

[68:41]and she said yeah you you should take sunday as a as a day off so take a break so i did hey so hey

[68:49]aaron this story has no more utility to me yeah right it doesn't none at all so i did so i took

[68:56]so sunday last sunday and it was like take the day it's yours so i played basketball until

[69:02]although he's 11 got up whatever played hoops came home took a shower uh went to the egg pals i was

[69:11]playing basketball it is not a strange woman that you smell me i was playing basketball i went to

[69:18]it's so weird i played against a team of pubic lice egg pals pop up at the ramen shop and i got

[69:24]a egg sandwich and it was great because the veggie special had goat the veggie special had gochujang

[69:32]on it and i really wanted the gochujang cabbage but i also wanted some bacon and so i said can i

[69:37]get the veggie special and add bacon and the guy said yeah that's the move so i got this sound clip

[69:42]is getting harder and harder to push i'm not gonna lie the egg pal veg special gochujang cabbage add

[69:49]bacon and a coffee egg cream and then i wanted to go to the berkeley library but it's closed on sunday

[69:55]so i couldn't go to the berkeley library so i went to the farmer's market and i got a chicken it was

[70:02]some blueberries and some strawberries walnuts so you ran errands dude the farmer's market by

[70:09]yourself is incredible marvelous and then i came home and yeah then i then i did like some stuff

[70:17]around like you had to you came home at like 11 59 p.m i came home no i came home at 1 p.m and i

[70:23]fixed the heater in the yard and then i went downtown to the wine shop because i was going

[70:27]to pick up my wine but they were inexplicably closed so i had to go to the devil's stand

[70:32]which is a great bar and have a shot in a beer and then i came home at 4 30 that was my day that's

[70:37]my whole wow and then this last week solo it's solo errands and a few and a few drinks that

[70:43]you're in there that's a great day that was that's my day uh that was day one that was day

[70:47]one and then the second day i have a buddy uh who's moving from uh he lives in richmond california

[70:52]he's i've known him since i moved out here he's leaving and going to move into connecticut so i

[70:57]took a day to hang out with him and another guy we did the swan oyster depot we did the swan oyster

[71:02]did a russian bath and i got locker number 69 and then we saw nice and then we well i didn't

[71:10]choose it that's the locker they gave me and sure and then we saw the mission there's a case that

[71:15]they gave me yeah yeah that was it did you look over your buddy did you now aaron is this a good

[71:20]enough buddy where when you got that locker did you look over your buddy go hey yeah yeah there

[71:24]were there were three of us yeah and of course they were very much like 69 did you tell them

[71:28]about guy on top day yeah but guys this i mean it was a little weird like hey i bet you can hold me

[71:32]up upside down in the steam room i bet you can like my one buddy was like yeah i want to go to

[71:36]this russian bath and we're like okay cool and then the other guy was like well i brought a

[71:39]swimsuit and the other two of us are like well we we didn't we didn't know that it was a thing

[71:43]and so i mean i know these guys like pretty well but not like as well as i know you guys and it

[71:49]was just like okay well now we're now we're just naked with each other for like 90 minutes and like

[71:54]so many naked dudes just like naked dudes aaron can i tell you we went to a spa for mother's day

[72:02]hot as hot tubs were in the women's side of the locker room yeah and it was nude only right so my

[72:07]kids got a little extra mother's day surprise okay when they were going with their mom naked

[72:15]into various tubs now i went to the same place and i'm just going to say this aaron what time

[72:18]were you there were you there later in the day or just 1 p.m it was happy hour because it's only

[72:21]55 from 10 a.m to 4 p.m so you're at one that's smart because i can tell you i was there by myself

[72:26]when it was closing oh and when i was nude in the male area that had multiple pools and steam rooms

[72:32]there was nothing you could do where it didn't look like i was asking somebody to come in and

[72:36]give me a handjob i would make eye contact with somebody then walk into the steam room they were

[72:41]then walking into and i was like uh-oh this guy wants to give me a handjob and it came to the

[72:46]point where i was just like i might just begin the handjob at the spot you know what i mean like

[72:50]i might just if this happens i might just have to let this happen i might because there's nothing

[72:56]like okay you go to a hot tub dude you get in the hot tub with a naked guy you expect a handjob

[73:01]is gonna happen you know what i mean yeah like you almost have to say to him i don't want a handjob

[73:06]but then you know what that sounds like you want exactly what a guy wants a handjob would say it's

[73:11]like the saunas and steam rooms are fine because everybody kept their towels wrapped around them

[73:14]in those places but yeah getting into the hot tubs or the cool the cold tubs you're just fully

[73:18]naked with another dude you don't know and let's face it aaron when you get out your balls are so

[73:24]long you know i mean you just got the biggest case of long balls when they get that hot and

[73:28]then you go get in that cold plunge cold plunge i couldn't stand there for more than a minute

[73:31]more than like five or seven breaths the cold plunges yeah yeah so aaron's gonna get to two

[73:37]minutes and you're truly aaron did your friends have bigger weans than you were you shocked by

[73:41]the size of their weans was there anything going on there you know i thought honestly rob i did

[73:45]think about you a lot because i was really trying hard i was trying so hard to not look at everybody's

[73:51]dongs and i was like rob it's hard i'll be in their size of people up like rob it's hard to

[73:55]not look you gotta look rob would know i was not looking i don't know how big it's and it's crazy

[74:00]how it changes your opinion because i

[74:01]knew a guy in the football team who by all measures except for one very important one

[74:06]was the most diminutive guy i've ever met just a tiny little guy who had an absolute hammer it was

[74:14]it was unbelievable and i respected that man forever i see you know what i mean like this

[74:19]man was a leader of you i was trying to even kick an extra point oh it was it was crazy

[74:25]it was crazy so that's it that's how i spent my spent my time to myself so now i got one question

[74:31]though yeah yeah this was a a midweek day off is that is that right midweek day off

[74:36]how did you you know we've talked about this just a little bit how did you feel about the midweek

[74:42]yeah as opposed to it being like a monday or a friday day to take off man like a midweek

[74:47]midweek day as you get older that's the day to take off then you only have to wear two days in

[74:52]a row yeah right two days day off two days two days off you know what i did this week that i

[75:01]got the show let's talk about the oh do you want to sub for my middle schoolers at the end of the

[75:06]school year they're really well behaved they're learning a lot they love being yeah they love

[75:10]being in school i'm taking a pto day to have dinner with magic mike done and done our school

[75:15]shut down learning after may 1st is yours that way rob like we weren't learning like our kids

[75:19]weren't learning no for the entire month no no no we're we're pushing it still okay we're working

[75:24]really hard we're not diving into chad gbt and then just do that lesson plan now okay here's the deal

[75:31]aaron did did you bring any boston big beans into the bathhouse with you i can tell you boston big

[75:36]beans in a bath seems like a bad idea oh it's a great it's so great listen we are talking about

[75:42]blue lines by massive attack what does it feel like aaron tell me what it feels like in the

[75:47]bathhouse what's it feel like that what you just said was it feel like no i was just saying i feel

[75:51]like boston big beans would not be a good choice in a bath it seems like that's why you're that's

[75:56]wrong it's your west coast bias yeah we are talking

[76:01]boston big bean bias yeah oh i bet if there were la beans you'd love to have them in the bathhouse

[76:05]oh yeah it's a quadruple b boston bean bias quad the quad i would grab the head of my

[76:11]penis and i would be like have you ever seen a boston big bean so big and red

[76:14]reminds me of some jokes i did when i was in high school that for sure would land me in big

[76:23]trouble now in retrospect in retrospect those jokes were not okay we are talking about blue

[76:30]lines by massive attack now did anybody else think they were going to listen to a punk album

[76:34]when this album started did they just me anybody else i had no idea i had never heard of massive

[76:40]attack i had this is the music every when i was listening i had a vague idea they were trip up

[76:44]everything i listened to before inside inside the game here before i ever listened to an album i

[76:52]read the wikipedia about the album wow i know what it is going to be in before i listen to it

[76:58]that's smart russell because i was

[77:00]i put it on the alexa and i was mystified by what came out i could not believe it but it turns out

[77:05]this is trip hop this is british trip hop in the early 1980s right what's that we've done

[77:13]trip down before portishead i feel like is the class i said yeah yeah so i will say this i have

[77:17]this in my notes but we need to avoid saying dribble about this okay because that trip hop

[77:22]has some of online the most passionate fans it's bands i've never heard of yet the fans on reddit

[77:30]are the most passionate of almost any music type we've learned to and the bad the one bad review

[77:34]this podcast has gotten that wasn't immediately turned into a funny joke was about portishead when

[77:39]the guy said we were just saying too much drivel about portishead uh in the early 1980s we got dj

[77:44]jaddy g and mushroom with rappers tricky and 3d they meet as what they call russell a partying

[77:53]collective known as the wild bunch and that's going to come up over and over so partying collective

[77:59]now that sounds fun doesn't it being part of a partying collective that's something i've never

[78:02]been in my life oh yeah uh to to me partying should always be different how you feel about

[78:08]unionization right yeah we're beyond that now can't organize your parties yeah when you grab

[78:15]the means of the production of the parties aaron then you're the partying collective this is massive

[78:20]attacks first album okay and basically i i like this idea that uh it's it's it's it's the first

[78:27]real album to be released in the first album to be released in the first album to be released in the

[78:28]first album that is this trip hop right which is taking american hip-hop okay and putting it

[78:34]through british culture and it's it's samples it's electronica it's dance but it's really slowed down

[78:40]it's atmospheric female vocals just like we heard with portishead uh and basically i miles raymer

[78:47]said this great in pitchfork because it was really fun to read when this when the remastered was

[78:52]released in 2012 and this album came out again and people got to reflect on how powerful this album is

[78:58]those articles are really interesting and and in pitchfork miles raymer said the blocky rhythms and

[79:03]minimal arrangements that defined rap's identity in the 80s right like like we heard just heard

[79:08]with bdp yeah yeah we're just starting to be replaced by the deep organic textures that would

[79:13]be defined the 90s and blue lines with at the forefront so this is 91 yeah right so this is

[79:19]again we talked about it this is only a couple years after bdp you know chronic has just come

[79:24]out we're really doing this transition and kind of hip-hop now i have to tell you this

[79:28]3D, born in 1965.

[79:30]Daddy G, 1959.

[79:32]Elizabeth Frazier, 1963.

[79:34]Horace Andy in 51.

[79:35]And Tricky was in 68.

[79:37]Wait, so their 3D was the Dudley Boys.

[79:40]D-Von would hoist the guy up.

[79:42]Then Bob would come in with a diamond cutter type of move, Rob.

[79:45]3D.

[79:46]Listen, I love 3Ds when they're on a bra label.

[79:49]Triple Ds?

[79:51]Yeah, triple Ds.

[79:52]I'll put those to the table.

[79:53]Okay, get out the tables.

[79:55]So I just like looking at the birthdays, Russell.

[79:58]I just want to say this.

[79:59]Horace Andy was born in 1951.

[80:01]Tricky is 1968.

[80:02]That means that there's a 17-year difference between these,

[80:05]which always makes me think of my favorite story about old, young band members.

[80:09]And that, of course, is the band LMFAO, where Red Fu is the other guy's nephew.

[80:15]It is an uncle-nephew pairing that did Party Rocking, and it's never not funny.

[80:19]Could you imagine if we had a 61-year-old as one of our hosts?

[80:28]Or like a 27-year-old?

[80:30]Like you're making all these long, bald jokes, and they're like, yeah, I'm with you, Rob.

[80:34]Yeah, really.

[80:35]Hey, what was your guys' favorite M.A.S.H. episode?

[80:38]I don't know.

[80:39]That's what I think all people are into.

[80:40]It's M.A.S.H.

[80:42]Safe from Harm.

[80:43]I just started this at the intro because I think it gives you a good idea of what the album's going to be like.

[80:47]This is, the bass is a sample of Billy Coleman's Status, Stratus.

[80:52]And they said when they found this bass sample, they just realized they had a groove right away.

[80:58]And Aaron, the drums, Funkadelic, good old music.

[81:02]Oh, are they?

[81:02]Oh, I didn't know that.

[81:04]I wouldn't have recognized that.

[81:05]I wouldn't have spotted it.

[81:07]This sounds like the opening of some Beck songs.

[81:10]For sure.

[81:11]For sure.

[81:12]I wonder if we're going to have a little Beck tie-in later in this album.

[81:14]I've got a tie-in now.

[81:16]Uh-oh.

[81:17]Russell, come on.

[81:18]Don't do it.

[81:18]We do that after the podcast.

[81:19]Take that off your neck.

[81:20]I'll wait.

[81:21]Okay.

[81:22]Put on Dark Star real quick by Beck, unless I'm ruining something.

[81:26]No, no, no.

[81:27]Go ahead.

[81:27]Put on Dark Star.

[81:28]By Beck.

[81:29]Very similar, man.

[81:33]Wow.

[81:35]How about that?

[81:38]Yeah.

[81:38]That's a great, great Beck song.

[81:41]I love this one.

[81:41]This does sound a lot like it.

[81:50]You're right, man.

[81:51]God damn, you're smart.

[81:52]Well, it kicks in right here.

[81:54]Hold on.

[81:54]Ready?

[81:55]Oh, I got one more.

[81:57]That was one thing when I was talking.

[81:58]I was talking to Magic Mike in Reno.

[81:59]You know what I realized?

[82:00]I'm fucking stupid.

[82:02]I should not be hosting a music podcast.

[82:04]I don't know anything about music.

[82:06]But you got personality, bro.

[82:08]You know what?

[82:09]That's a great point, Matt.

[82:10]Okay?

[82:11]Personality has gotten me really, really far.

[82:14]Next up, we have a song about monogamy.

[82:17]One Love.

[82:18]This is Horace Andy is singing this.

[82:20]Chara Nelson was on the last song.

[82:22]I had a hard time with this.

[82:25]Some of these songs, like, I really got into a groove with.

[82:28]Like, I was like, I don't know.

[82:28]When we listened to it before, there's a handful of it.

[82:31]It's like every other one.

[82:32]It's not every other one, but a lot of them, like,

[82:34]I could see myself, like, walking through the city

[82:36]and having, like, having, like, a vibe.

[82:38]And then other of some are kind of just strange.

[82:40]Yeah.

[82:42]Yeah.

[82:42]Are those the same horns from Simon Says?

[82:44]Can I just tell you this?

[82:46]I think you can play, like, spots and samples

[82:47]for the entire album.

[82:48]Can I tell you this, Aaron?

[82:50]Yeah.

[82:51]I was convinced I knew the sample.

[82:53]This is the song that plays with my wife calls.

[82:56]I thought for sure those horns were from

[82:58]the theme to Godzilla.

[82:59]Oh, that's the, yeah, yeah.

[83:04]That's the Simon Says.

[83:05]And what I realized, Aaron.

[83:09]Yeah.

[83:09]First of all, do you think it's funny

[83:12]that this is what plays with my wife calls?

[83:13]Yes, that's good.

[83:14]So every time she calls, I feel threatened.

[83:16]What's the rap song that uses this, Aaron?

[83:18]Simon Says by Sarah Munch.

[83:19]Shut.

[83:20]Get the fuck up.

[83:21]There's also a wrestler.

[83:22]I told you I have a good list today,

[83:24]and you're doing this to me right now.

[83:25]There's also a wrestler that uses it, Matt.

[83:26]Dun, dun, dun, dun.

[83:27]Samoa Joe.

[83:28]I believe when he was in WWE,

[83:29]he used that to use it.

[83:30]All right, Rob, you can edit that out.

[83:31]Keep going.

[83:32]It turns out, okay,

[83:34]I can't edit that out, Aaron.

[83:35]You keep saying twats.

[83:36]It turns out that those horns are actually

[83:39]one of the most sampled hip hop people of all time.

[83:43]It's by Isaac Hayes, Ike's Mood.

[83:45]Now listen to this.

[83:46]This is what it's really from.

[83:47]And by the way,

[83:48]let me just play the part I'm playing real quick.

[83:50]There's a horn part right here.

[83:52]I don't know why I'm doing this.

[83:58]That right there.

[83:59]It's not Godzilla.

[84:01]It turned out it's Ike's Mood.

[84:03]That's how this goes into a song.

[84:08]It's so good.

[84:11]But it got me thinking

[84:14]about how much I love that Godzilla theme,

[84:16]so I thought I would simply make a list

[84:18]of the best songs to ever have

[84:20]the Godzilla theme in.

[84:22]And these are songs that we haven't mentioned

[84:25]in a long time.

[84:28]Jump.

[84:28]I want you to pull up.

[84:29]WWE Destroyer.

[84:31]Samoa Joe.

[84:32]WWE Destroyer.

[84:35]Is Russell big-timing?

[84:36]I think he is.

[84:37]Samoa Joe.

[84:38]How dare you talk over Rob

[84:40]when he's talking about his list.

[84:41]Mocha Joe.

[84:42]I didn't say don't talk over Rob.

[84:43]Wow.

[84:46]Hold on.

[84:47]Just give it a second.

[84:48]Wow.

[84:54]Oh, maybe not quite.

[84:58]It's definitely ripped off, though, isn't it?

[85:00]It's a pastiche, big time.

[85:02]It's a pastiche.

[85:02]Okay, Rob, I'll let you get back to this.

[85:04]It's a badass song, though.

[85:05]Now, it turns out

[85:07]that the Godzilla original theme

[85:09]was written by a guy named

[85:12]Akira Ifukubi in Japan.

[85:15]And this guy started as a forester.

[85:18]He was going through,

[85:19]and the Japanese government said,

[85:20]you need to test types of wood

[85:22]to see how strong they are for the war effort.

[85:24]But we don't have any lead,

[85:25]but you've got to test it with x-rays.

[85:27]Okay, well, kind of like Godzilla.

[85:29]He used too many x-rays,

[85:31]and he actually got radiation poisoning,

[85:33]so he had to stop working for the forestry.

[85:35]So instead, he did his hobby full-time,

[85:37]which was being a composer.

[85:39]He composed a number of marches,

[85:42]and in fact, when he was sick in the hospital

[85:43]from radiation poisoning,

[85:44]he heard one of his marches played

[85:46]as General MacArthur was walking in

[85:49]to formalize the Japanese surrender.

[85:51]He heard it over the radio,

[85:52]which is crazy, right?

[85:54]Now, you think,

[85:54]oh, is this another marching episode from Rob?

[85:56]No, we're not even talking about the marches.

[85:57]But he developed the Godzilla theme song,

[86:00]which, again, is this.

[86:01]One of the all-time classic themes in movie history.

[86:05]If you went and saw Godzilla Minus One,

[86:08]they played this,

[86:09]and it was so good when he comes out.

[86:11]Oh, it's so good.

[86:11]But it turns out that this guy

[86:14]also developed Godzilla's roar, okay?

[86:18]And he did this with a move

[86:19]that I know that Russell's done before,

[86:21]where he rubbed a resin-covered leather glove

[86:24]along the loosened strings of a double bass.

[86:26]Okay?

[86:27]Listen to this.

[86:28]This is what...

[86:29]He took a glove across a bass and made this.

[86:31]Wow.

[86:34]So not only did he do the song,

[86:36]he did the roar.

[86:37]That is awesome.

[86:38]What's crazy is this guy lived until 2006.

[86:42]So this is all taking place in, like, 1950.

[86:45]He lives until 2006.

[86:46]So I'm going to take you through a list of Godzilla songs,

[86:49]but I'm going to go in reverse chronological order.

[86:51]In 2020,

[86:53]Big Sean releases a song called The Baddest.

[86:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[86:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[86:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[86:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[86:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[86:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[86:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[87:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[87:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[88:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[88:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[89:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[89:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[90:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[90:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[91:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[91:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[92:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[92:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:51]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:51]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:51]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:51]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:51]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:51]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:51]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[93:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[94:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[94:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[95:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[95:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[96:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[96:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[97:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[97:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[98:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[98:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[99:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[99:56]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[99:56]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[99:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[100:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[100:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[101:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[101:57]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[102:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[102:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[102:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[102:56]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[103:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[103:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[103:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[103:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[103:56]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[104:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[104:56]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[105:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[105:56]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:26]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:27]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[106:49]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[107:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[107:49]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[108:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[108:49]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[109:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[109:49]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[110:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[110:49]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[111:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[111:49]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.

[112:19]And it's a song that's called The Baddest.